Hey, Mindless minio... I mean, readers! I have taken note that I don't really go through the steps of this temple very well, but it is a hard temple to do, let alone write about. Anyway, enjoy this chapter!

This chapter is brought to you by Crappy Authors Inc. where rejected authors from around the world put this s*** together for your own entertainment.

Link: I have decided that I am going to break the fourth wall!

Navi: HEY! What fourth wall? This is a fan fic, the fourth wall isn't even in the vocabulary.

Link: Yeah, but this fan fic is so bad it needs a little bit of spicing up! Besides, I need to communicate to my fan girls out there.

(Blows a kiss)

Link: That's for you, my lovely honey bunches!

Navi: LISTEN! My only consolation in this entire mess is that by the end of this story I will be leaving you, and you will be presented with a new fairy who is less annoying as me, but far ruder.

Link: Did you just break the fourth wall?

This chapter begins with Link in the Water Temple. Ruto and Link talking, much to Link's dismay.

Ruto: My love! We have finally united!

Link: This just sucks. Why is it taking so long for me to finish my adventure? If I had finished sooner, I may have been saved from this horror!

Ruto: You think I am happy about it? I had to wait thirteen chapters before I could FINALLY meet you again! It makes me so happy!

Link: Talking about chapters is breaking the fourth wall! I am the one who is suppose to break it!

Ruto: Didn't you hear? There is no fourth wall in this story, which means there is nothing to break, which means that you are a little late to the party. You and I will be married, and have children together forever and ever! Unless it turns out I am some sort of sage, then I am afraid our marriage will be ruined.

Link: You just love to listen to yourself talk, don't you?

Ruto: Who doesn't?

Link: True.

Ruto: Follow me, Link. Before we can get married, there is a horrible monster in this temple, which, according to the Manga of this game, is a monster that I can apparently talk to. He wishes to marry me instead, but I have no wish to!

Link: Really? Then, I wish you a happy marriage.

Ruto: But…!

Link: Well, Navi, it's time to go!

Navi: LOOK! Wait, Link, hold on, use your head!

Link: What are you talking about?

Navi: HEY! If we let Ruto breed with a sea monster that lives in a fresh water lake, there will be mutant Zora babies running around who will be exactly like Ruto… only ten times worse.

Link: Ruto, let's go kill the beast!

Ruto: Very well, follow me!

Navi: LOOK! Do the words "You're going to vanish and we will be lost" mean anything to either of you?

Ruto and Link: No.

Navi: HEY! I am surrounded by idiots.

Link: Yes. Yes you are.

And thus, as you can imagine, Ruto mysteriously vanishes, which is SUCH a downer, because Link just simply LOVES Ruto. Navi and Link end up wandering the Water Temple for along time, trying to remember when to raise water levels and, for that freakin matter, WHERE!

Link: I hate this temple, I hate this temple, I hate this temple, I hate this temple…

Navi: LOOK! It's not so bad.

Link: What is this temple even for? Most temples are used to be worshipped at! Like the Temple of Whatever Maannga called it (bonus point for anyone who can find out! I'm too lazy to go back and find it out myself.), Temple of Fire, I mean, it all made sense. But now we are in a freakin temple underwater, where only Ruto can be found, and to be honest she is the last thing I what to see.

Navi: HEY! Look at Mr. Negative! Well, Link, it's to give the fan girls a chance to see you fight your shadow self in a duel to the death. Girls love to see heroes fight their sexy alter self, apparently.

Link: The fiends!

Navi: WATCH OUT! First you like fan girls, then you hate them. Make up your mind, freak.

Link: Listen, I don't mind giving my sexy body to the ladies, but when woman take pleasure in seeing me with my sexy alter ego, they have taken a step to far.

Navi: HEY! Don't you also hate the fan fics about you hooked up with other male characters, or any other creepy characters? Like Ganondorf or that dog lady she-male thing from Castle Town?

Link: That dog person is female? And besides, there was a fan fic about that? I must sue!

Navi: LOOK! You didn't say anything about Ganondorf.

Link: I thought it would be implied that I would hate it.

Navi: LOOK! But you're talking to a fairy that repeats herself every other second she can, so assuming that I would understand your implying is making an ass of yourself.

Link: Look, I'm a cross dresser, not a gay hero!

Navi: HEY! …

To get on with the temple, Link and Navi slowly make their way through the Water Temple, hoping to not make a mistake that would mess up the entire game so that they would totally have to start over from scratch…. Grrrr….

Link: Hey, Navi, look! A giant room filled with water and a sky, and a mysterious island with a tree in the center! A random door is behind it! I just hope that nothing will attack me in this obvious mini-boss room.

Navi: WATCH OUT! All right, Link, it's time to get the hookshot.

Link: Stop breaking the fourth wall without me!

Navi: WATCH OUT! All right, Link, it's time to get the hookshot.

(Suddenly, bars fall and lock Link in)

Link: GAH! We're stuck!

Dark Link: Yes, you are.

Link: Where did YOU come from! You couldn't have possibly been standing secretly behind that tree.

Dark Link: No, I wasn't because if I had been I would have killed you from behind. But no matter. It's time to settle a score with you.

Link: What do you want? I have no qualm with you!

Dark Link: Yes, you do. You see, I am your sexy alter ego, very similar to that of Yugi and Yami, whose real name is Atem, from Yu-Gi-Oh. Except I'm not a pedophile possessing your body.

Link: I'm an adult!

Dark: True, but inside you are a child, Hero of Missed Puberty! However, because I am suppose to be your polar opposite, you have done some serious damage to my appearance. I am very manly, as opposed to you, and wearing this dress makes me look like a cross dresser. This simply won't do. Also, it gives the fan girls a chance to see us duel.

Link: Hang on, are you telling me that while I oppose to letting the fans see me fight my sexy alter ego self in a "suggestive" duel, you agree?

Dark: Yes, and while you surrender yourself to the fan girls normally, I can't stand them. You see, we are different!

Link: So then, you must be gay! Because I am not!

Dark: Look away, fan girls, before that truth is exposed!

WARNING: All conversation from this point on should not be viewed by fan girls, or else have your minds destroyed.

Dark: Yes, Link, because you are not gay, this makes ME gay! And being as manly as I am, this hurts my inner self!

Link: And this means that the fan girls may not get the moe they wished for.

Dark: Do you know what moe even means?

Link: I am a ten year old in a seventeen year old body. What do you think?

Dark: Poor fan girls, they are missing out, but I will still kill you, because you cannot kill me. The only thing we share in common with each other is your fighting skills, which are exactly the same.

Link: That makes no sense.

Dark: Exactly.

Link: I have Din's Fire!

Dark: Please, for this fan fic, Maannga decided to write it out. Good luck, "hero."

So, they engage in battle. Fan girls can look now.

Dark: Having trouble, Link?

Link: Gah! (in his thoughts) He's too strong! I cannot defeat him. Damn, if my Triforce of Courage had any power like Zelda's piece or Ganondorf's piece, I could defeat him a second. Well, I'm not suppose to know I own this piece, but whatever. Or if this was an anime, a magic being would come from out of nowhere to give me some weird magic spell to win! What is something I have that he doesn't?

Dark: Getting tired? Nothing can save you now! Not the gods, not your princess. What are you going to do about it?

Link: I am going to reveal my facedown card! Behold, the Great Magical Beast of Annoyance, Navi the Fairy!

Dark: What? Since when is this Yu-Gi-Oh! Maannga….

Link: This monster allows me to attack you directly! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Navi: HEY! Dark Link, he's so mean to me! If you are his alter ego, then you must be nicer!

Dark: Heh, is that the best you got. She isn't that annoying at all!

Navi: HEY! Dark Link, he's so mean to me! If you are his alter ego, then you must be nicer!

Dark: Huh? Why did she repeat herself!

Link: Not only is she annoying when she says HEY! LOOK! LISTEN!, but she has the ability to repeat herself over and over again, driving you mad!

Dark: NO! This can't be! No one can withstand this torture!

Link: Except me! And now, be gone!

(Dark Link dies from the attack)

Link: Navi, that was probably the most impressive thing you have done this entire story! I am impressed!

Navi: HEY! Dark Link, he's so mean to me! If you are his alter ego, then you must be nicer!

Link: Ok, do that one more time and I will rip all your wings out.

Link and Navi continue to the final stage. The room before the boss room. The impossible room of death.

Link: Why is this room so difficult. Honestly, I am going to lose all my hearts before I even get to the boss! This might was well be the boss.

Navi: LOOK! Watch out for those sharp blades! If you get hit by those, then you will end up sliding back down to the bottom of this room!

Link: Navi, I am aware of that, I already tried to climb this thing five times.

Navi: LOOK! Watch out for those sharp blades! If you get hit by those, then you will end up sliding back down to the bottom of this room!

Link: Navi, repeat yourself one more time, I dare you.

Navi: LOOK! Watch out for those….

Thanks for reading, everyone! Look forward to the next chapter! I hope you guys had an easier time going through the Water Temple than when I went through for the first time… And I hope you didn't mess up when you had the Golden Scale and a bunch of other goodies that are hard to get…

Ruto: I just realized that I don't appear in this chapter a lot. I wonder why…

Tingle: Don't worry, my dear, you will have another chance! Now, when seducing Link…

Dark Link: Maannga killed me off, but didn't destroy Ruto why?