In which the explosion looms over all

"Now the first time you kill somebody, that's the hardest." - Virgil, True Romance, by Quentin Tarantino and Roger Avery

Gendo kneeled over the toilet, vomiting.

Rei watched him, unconcerned either about his condition or the fact that she was in a male restroom. She was slightly concerned about the filth in the room, and made a note to fire the janitors in charge of the area. But there were more important things at the moment. She turned to Raidon, who stood next to her, looking uncomfortable.

"As you can see," she said coldly, "the A-Type armor is flawed. Gendo wasn't ill until he went on the field mission."

Raidon glared. "A-Type armor protects the Evangelion unit from radiation, not the pilot. The Entry Plug is completely sealed to begin with. You couldn't irradiate it. Not here on planet Earth, anyways."

"There's no other reason for him to be ill," the doctor responded.

Raidon shrugged. "Maybe he ate something that disagreed with him. Maybe it's just a bit of motion sickness. Don't blame me. Not unless the A-Type failed the Evangelion unit. That's what it's designed to protect." He turned and began to walk away.

"I didn't say you were dismissed," Rei said coldly.

Raidon stopped and took a deep breath.

"Dismissed," Rei said after a minute of making him stand there. He walked away in angrily. She glared at Gendo. "What's wrong with you then? I was afraid you were contaminated. If it's not that, then what?"

Gendo vomited some more.

Rei swore under her breath and walked away. "When you empty your stomach, report to my office and I'll give you some medicine, then."

Gendo nodded a little, but stopped quickly. What could have affected him so badly? He couldn't think what it coul-

No, he could. He knew exactly what it was. As soon as he'd pulled the trigger on the prototype missile launcher that Captain Soryu had approved, and watched the explosion, he'd felt... sick. So many people, dead.

It was as if he'd been connected to each and every one of them, and then all of them were suddenly, irrevocably gone, because he'd cut the connections.

Now it was midnight. He'd eaten dinner at eleven o'clock, which was ridiculously late, because that was how it always was. But today even the plants felt like beings of respect, and as he bit into them he felt sick. Then he'd run here and had been vomiting up lunch and dinner. A disgusting state of affairs. Hopefully it would end soon.

When it did, he took a minute to wonder if Lieutenant Watanabe Raidon had actually been at Nerv, or if the Doctor had woke him up. He didn't care either way, it was just curiosity. Doctor Ayanami had a way of being cold to the people around her. He emulated that as best as he could, to make her proud.

Thus far, it hadn't been working.

3792:00:00

Horaki Kodama walked into Shinji's office wearing black. He wasn't surprised to see the Horaki sister in mourning, but he was surprised to see her the very day after her sister's death.

Shinji almost smiled at her, but checked himself. That didn't feel right, all things considered. "I… I'm glad to be able to meet you."

Kodama nodded, sitting down in the chair across Shinji's desk, rubbing at her eyes. "It's… I really wish we weren't meeting like this." She seemed close to tears. "Poor Nozomi…" she muttered.

"Yes. I have already sent Yamada and Asari to location. They're going to conduct as full of an investigation as possible, to determine exactly what happened."

"I'm sure it was the JSSDF," Kodama said coldly. "I know HCI and Nerv have always been rivals, but you are just a UN organization. Odds were our success would just mean our robots would replace Nerv-created ones, but Nerv itself wouldn't be threatened… The JSSDF though…" she trailed off.

"Yes," Shinji agreed. For years they'd been developing, wanting to kick the UN off of their islands and defend themselves solo. A robot force under their control would be enough to not only accomplish that, but to establish Japan as a world, or at least Pacific, power.

And, of course, Shinji genuinely believed that Nerv had nothing to do with anything.

"Uh… why did your employers call this meeting?" he asked after a moment.

"Former employers," Kodama corrected. "I'm leaving the company to focus on other matters..." Then she smiled a little, a fake smile, but a smile all the same. "But, there was a reason. You see, Jet Alone was a prototype, but it wasn't the only one we had. There's another model we still have. It works."

Shinji nodded a little. "I assume this means you're offering it to us?"

"Yes," Kodama said. "We're making a couple of adjustments so it can run off of the power supply if you'd like to leave the reactor off."

"The price?" Shinji asked, worried.

"It'll be high. Another reason they're my former employers is because HCI is about to collapse. Everyone's sold stock, no one's buying. We're barely worth pennies now, and at least three groups have begun to boycott everything we've made. HCI is dead."

The commander shifted uncomfortably. "I'll have to talk to the UN if we're talking about billions of yen."

"I'm afraid they are."

"I'll see what I can do," Shinji said. "How can I get back to you on this?" He reached into his desk and pulled out a notebook and pen.

Kodama handed Shinji a card. "Do hurry, Commander. If you take too long, there won't be an HCI left." She rose and left his office without waiting to see if he had anything else to say.

Shinji leaned back in his chair, and sighed. Then he took out his laptop, printed something out, and signed it.

TEMPORARY LEAVE OF ABSENCE FORM

Employee: Horaki Hikari

Duration: To the discretion of the employee

Reason: Death in the family

Signature: Ikari Shinji

3782:52:39

Keita took off his glasses as they flew overhead, looking down on the world below them. The Nerv helicopter was comfortable but not made out of iron, so the pilot was holding them as high above the terrain as possible. It wasn't like Old Tokyo hadn't been irradiated dozens of times.

Kaito almost yawned, but managed to hold it in. "See anything of interest?"

"Meh. There's not much to see now. All the emissions are over with."

Kaito frowned. Asari hadn't packed anything when the two of them had set off on this mission, and he didn't see him using any instruments. To be doing any kind of proper scanning, they'd need something. Human beings weren't exactly designed to see into the radio part of the spectrum.

"Anyways, there's a lot of metal around still, but it's all too damaged. You'd need a lab to make heads or tails of it, and even then it would have to be with HCI's help so we'd know what was what."

"So what are you saying then?" Kaito asked. He tried staring down, but couldn't see anything that particularly stood out. The wreckage of Jet Alone blended in perfectly with the city as far as he could see. He wondered briefly if this was going to be a regular assignment. He hoped not.

"I'm saying that the way things are right now, it could have been anything. Maybe Jet Alone was just unstable and it blew up on its own. Maybe someone sabotaged it."

"Dammit," Kaito whispered. "We can't have this going on now. If someone is sabotaging robots, they'll be going after us sooner or later."

"So what's Nerv going to do, you think?" Keita asked.

Kaito considered for a few moments. "I dunno," he said. "I guess it depends on how much danger the Commander thinks there is."

3780:11:26

"What are we going to do then?" Toji asked at the inevitable Nerv meeting, held on the upper levels of their command center. Six of the seven most important members of Nerv were gathered; himself, Asuka, Rei, Kensuke, Kaworu, and Shinji. Hikari had of course not even arrived that day. She wouldn't be needed, not right now.

"If it was a terrorist action," Asuka said, "the obvious course of action is to pull the kids out of school and keep them down here twenty-four seven."

"Not an option," Rei said. "Maya's synch ratio has been increasing more now that she interacts with her classmates on a proper level. Removing her would devastate her and possibly crash her ability to pilot. We can't possibly risk something like that."

"Sniper teams then?" Kensuke suggested. "To watch them at all times and keep them safe from suspicious individuals. One team per pilot… Hell, the team that watches Gendo won't have a whole lot to worry about."

"I'll approve it immediately," Kaworu said. "Right now at least the two are synching, right? They're in no real danger in an Evangelion unit." He turned to Shinji. "Is there anything else we need to worry about, sir?"

"We should increase security if possible," Shinji said. "The JSSDF are almost certainly behind this action, and I don't want to have them trying anything on us. We have to keep protecting mankind, and if they're this fanatical, I suspect they're not interested. Or, more worryingly, their project might be near completion."

"Worringly?" Asuka asked. "Surely they wouldn't be able to kick us out…"

"You'd be amazed," Rei said. "Worse, there are allegations that they kidnapped children during the aftermath of Second Impact."

Toji sighed. "I'm glad our company doesn't sink to those sorts of lows."

Shinji nodded. "Of course not. This is about humanity. Unless there's anything else we need to do, this meeting is adjourned."

Everyone stood up and left, except Asuka, who stared at her papers. "That's the second time I've heard you say that… Are you really that consumed by guilt?" she muttered.

3779:26:08