A/N: I know that this chapter is really short and it still took me ages to post it. But your reviews for the last chapter got me (and my beta for that matter) thinking. I found it incredibly hard to add some of the things you mentioned. Yet here it is and I hope you can live with that and it does Mac some justice.

14 – Working Out The Impact

Mac lay in her bed, her eyes strained on the window behind which she could see the lights of Chicago. She couldn't sleep – again. Only this time the thinking that kept her awake, though it followed the same chain of thoughts as that of the previous night, was different, more bothersome. While she had been able to settle for the pleasant thoughts the night before, her mind now focused on the bad decisions she'd made in life, at least as far as it concerned Harm and her together. And it all culminated in the ever so wrong decision to separate their children. Both her and Harm might have thought it to be for the best, but now that she saw herself face to face with the consequences and their children's reaction that definitely wasn't the case. Yet still, they all would have to cope with things. One way or another, they all would need to adjust. The only question was, in what way they would adapt.

Her eyes slipped from the window and settled on the bed next to hers. They roamed over the sleeping form of Aaron, her eyes barely making out the outlines of the child.

Mac suppressed a sigh that wanted to escape her lungs when she remembered how she found her little boy sitting outside the door, crying. As she lay there, on her side, and listened to the even breathes of her son, Mac thought about the previous hour. An hour she had spent with Aaron by her side, trying to explain to him just why he never knew about his father.

It hurt her, now that she realized that the boy of nine, nearly ten, has always believed that his father didn't care about him. She wasn't sure that her explanations, which were enough ten years ago but now were insufficient at best, had done anything to devoid him of that thought.

Mac rolled onto her back, closing her eyes. Yet there were a lot of questions she couldn't get rid of. Would the new situation destroy the happy childhood her son had up to now? Was there anything she could do to help him deal with it? Would he even accept any help from her?

And what would happen after that? Was there a real chance for her and Harm? Could she even think or wish about it when her own son wasn't happy with it? Yet could she stand the fact to not know about her daughter now that she met her? Everything was easier when she hadn't known Hannah. True, she never forgot the newborn girl she held in her arms next to her Aaron, but it was different. It was the past, a memory from a time she knew was long gone and would never return. But she'd spent three days with the girl and had come to know her at least a little. It was so much harder to let go of her now.

Mac's mind conjured pictures of the weekend. How the kids had laughed together. How the five of them had settled so easily into a routine as if they'd known each other for all the years they missed. Everything was fine before Harm and she decided to tell their children the truth. She wondered whether there was a chance that the future held anything in store for them that was even close to what she'd experienced since Thanksgiving.

Her thoughts wandered to Harm. Mac was amazed of how fast they had fallen back into the familiarity of their friendship. All these little details she missed throughout the last years were back again. The laughter they shared, the silent conversations and the little touches that seemed so natural.

Thinking about Harm made her see all the small things that changed about him. He was more open with his feelings now. She doubted that he would have told her ten years back that he was scared to see her or that he didn't know what he would do. He also clearly stated what it was that he wanted, something that she never was sure about in the past. And probably the one thing that had led to their separation – neither of them being able to really follow through with what they wanted the most.

It was then that Mac realized how great Harm was during the weekend and especially through their talk the night before, when he'd asked her to give their future a try, no matter what happened in the past. She as well understood – she knew it back then already, but always tried to ignore it – that the attitude she had before he made the decision to leave, had driven him away, had made a relationship with her seem impossible for him. Therefore she needed to apologize because she was wrong for pushing him away and for not arguing when he told her about his decision. If she didn't, she didn't think they would have a real chance in the future.

With her mind set that she would talk to Harm before they parted, exhaustion took over and let Mac finally drift off to sleep.

ooooo

The atmosphere at the breakfast table the next morning couldn't be compared to the playful manner that had opened yesterday's meal. An awkward silence enclosed the four people for whom life had taken a sharp turn the previous night.

Though Hannah had seemed to be relative understandable when hearing the news, she was quiet when she woke up. And she got even quieter and somewhat shy when she saw Mac sitting at their table. She was still insecure about the way she felt towards her.

Aaron on the other hand wasn't that undecided; he shot Harm a hostile glance when he approached the table.

"Hi Aaron, hi Mac." Kenny was the only one being his normal self, but for him yesterday's night hadn't held any surprises and he didn't know so far that his life might change.

"Mornin'," Mac offered him a soft smile.

After breakfast the three kids gladly took part in the children's activities of the hotel again, especially since neither Hannah nor Aaron seemed to be in the mood to spend more time than necessary with their newfound parents. That left Harm and Mac to pack their belongings. While doing so, Mac thought about the decision she made in the night. What was she going to say?

So now Harm and Mac sat in the lobby, their packed bags standing at their feet, passing away the last minutes before they would need to head for the airport. Both were silent, which seemed odd considered the fact that there were still so many open questions. But Mac still didn't know how to start and Harm wasn't sure about how to make their departure any easier for her, for him.

Finally it was Harm who started, "Did Aaron say anything last night?" It sure wasn't a question to light the mood, but it was what bothered Harm most of all. How was his son coping with the information?

"He didn't say much." Mac hesitated before she continued. "Just that he believes that you don't care about him."

She literally saw his face fall before he spoke. "But I do, I never forgot him and I always wondered how he was doing. And I don't know how often I was close to calling you or Harriet to ask about him."

"I know that Harm. And I'm sure Aaron will understand in time," Mac tried to convince him just as much as she sought to convince herself. She then braved herself for her next question. "What about Hannah, does she understand?"

"I'm not sure, and I definitely don't know why or how, but she seems to deal with it a little better. Though she still struggles through her feelings I guess," Harm offered with a slight smile.

Reassured by his answer, Mac took his hand and chanced her next question, "How do you feel about all this?"

Harm looked down at their joined hands, something he had missed for the last ten years.

"I despise hurting both Hannah and Aaron that much. I hate having to let you go again. This weekend felt so right. It was wonderful to have you back in my arms."

Though Mac knew that Harm was more open about his feelings, she still was surprised about his revelation. And it was the cue for her to finally say what she wanted to tell him the whole morning.

"I know how you feel. I don't want to let you go either. But for this to even have the chance to work out, I need to apologize." She raised her finger to stop Harm from interrupting. "I'm sorry for the way I acted previous to your leaving. I don't have any excuses and they won't change anything, I know that. However, I want you to know that I regret what I did back then."

Mac captured his gaze with hers. And Harm just gave a silent nod in response. He accepted her apology.

"So I don't need to worry whether we're going to see each other again?" Harm asked with a playful smile, trying to cover his fears.

"No, you don't," Mac replied, although she know that if Aaron wasn't willing to accept his father, it might be a hard thing to achieve. But this moment was about her and Harm and for the two of them she needed to believe that they would meet again and that things would somehow turn out alright.

ooooo

When they arrived at the gate of the plane back to Washington, there were only about 30 minutes left for Mac and Aaron to get their flight. So it was time for goodbye.

"Aaron, say your goodbyes, would you," Mac asked when she saw that her flight was already boarding.

"Bye Hannah." They had hugged shortly, nothing compared to the time they first met at this place. But still they were friends, or so he hoped.

He waved his hand at Kenny, before he turned to face down the corridor. He wasn't about to say goodbye to Harm.

Mac watched him closely and also saw Harm's reaction to the behavior of his son.

"Sorry," she mouthed.

"It's okay. I should have expected something like that."

So now it was time for her to say goodbye. Would she get the same reaction out of Hannah? So she first stuck her hand out to Kenny, who took and shook it rapidly. Inhaling deeply she turned to face her daughter, preparing for her reaction.

And Hannah only let her worry a few seconds before she took her mother's hand and softly whispered, "I'd like to see you again."

A smile grew on Mac's face. "And so would I. I'm glad to have finally met you."

Hannah nodded before she softly pulled her hand free.

Harm pulled her into an embrace when Mac faced him.

"I loved spending these days with you. As difficult as these last hours were, I've enjoyed the rest of the weekend." His lips were close to her ear, whispering the words into it.

"Let's not lose it again. I want to get to know my daughter. And I want to get to know you." Her lips softly brushed against his cheek, before she stepped out of his embrace.

"I promise," he said when she turned for heading after her son.

Mac only smiled, she knew she could rely on that.

ooooo

Early December had quickly passed without anybody even noticing. There were so many other things to take care of. Things like Kenny getting a really strong flu which kept him in bed for almost two weeks. And Aaron had been so engaged in a school play that would premiere in six days, that he hadn't much time to think about his father or tell any of his friends about the Chicago weekend at all.

As the rising amount of decorations and Santa Clauses all over town indicated, Christmas was approaching fast. Time to make plans on how to spend the holidays.

"Hi Mac. How are things on the East Coast?"

"Hello Harm. Pretty hectic I'd say." She'd just rushed home to be there in time to bring her son to today's rehearsal.

"Bad time for a call?"

"No it's okay, I like talking to you."

Over the last month they had talked several times. It was their reminder that they would meet, that they wouldn't lose touch again. And it was a reassurance that the other still felt the same way about it.

Harm heard her call for her son, his son, before she was back on the line.

"How is Aaron doing?" It was the same question every time he called. Harm wanted to know whether the boy was still mad at him.

"He won't tell me," Mac replied like always. She had decided on their flight home from Chicago that she wasn't going to push Aaron about it. If he wasn't willing to talk about his father, she wasn't going to bring it up. Yet she didn't keep the frequent calls between California and Virginia secret either. She'd had secrets for too long already. "We haven't talked much about Thanksgiving at all."

"You haven't?"

"Not since the night at the hotel. You did with Hannah?"

"Sort of." He hesitated a moment before adding, "No, actually we didn't." He wasn't going to lie to her.

The only time Thanksgiving had come up, had been the weekend thereafter when Trish had asked her grandchildren about Chicago and was pleased that Harm had finally told his daughter about her mother. Though she was in total shock when she'd learned that she had another grandson. She was still trying to understand why he'd never told her.

"Harm?" He must have missed Mac's last statement when he was recalling the weekend.

"Sorry, what did you just say?"

"I was asking why you called." 'Not that I need a special reason being able to talk to you again.' By now both Mac and Aaron had left the house and gotten in the car.

"Oh yes. I wanna ask about your plans for Christmas."

"Nothing yet, apart from our traditional dinner with our friends."

"I see. I wondered if we could meet again. See if we can get along. I'd love to spend time with Aaron. But if you got other plans I understand."

"Same here. I need to get to know my daughter. So how about you and the kids come to join us here?"

"You and Aaron okay with that?" He knew Hannah would love to see Mac and Aaron again. And Kenny would surely be overpowered by the prospect of snow in Virginia.

"Wait a moment." Mac lifted her eyes to the rearview mirror to look at her son sitting behind her, as they had already made their way towards school.

"He thinks he can handle you being here," she finally answered while still eying her son to verify if he had spoken the truth. She wouldn't like to see him unhappy, especially not during Christmas.

"So I guess I should book us a flight then."

"I'm looking forward to all of you being here. And I think there would be several more if only they knew."

"Right. We need to tell them, don't we?"

"Most probably." She wasn't looking forward to this.

"So I'll call with arriving hours." A loud horn could be heard from Mac's end of the line. "Where are you anyway?"

"Driving Aaron to his school play rehearsal."

"You know, I truly hope you're using a hands free set to call from a driving car, Mac." There was just a slight hint of teasing in his voice. He was worried about Mac concentrating enough on the traffic while talking to him.

Mac rolled her eyes, although he couldn't see it. "No worries there, Harm. Everything's under control," she replied in an amused tone, smiling about the way he cared.

"I still think I better hang up. Oh, and wish Aaron good luck from me."

"Will do. So until our next call."

"Bye."