AN: Thanks again to Lamb's Ear. I wish you could read her hilarious comments when she proofed this for me. Somehow she managed to include Beyonce lyrics.

Spock

Starfleet Academy showed few outward signs that anything had changed since the attack upon Earth 8 days previously. The ruins of the golden gate bridge were visible at times between the buildings as Spock made his way across the campus, but apart from the additional attention he received from the cadets in the hallways and quads, there were no other signs that anything had occurred - that almost a ¼ of the enrolled cadets, the majority of the fourth year students, were dead.

Spock made his way to his quarters. It was only the work of 23.5 minutes to pack his personal belongings. He placed the duffel bags and the case containing his Ka'athyra near the entrance to the quarters and changed into the instructor's uniform he had left out for that purpose. He had a PADD containing his letters of resignation, one for the Academy Board resigning his position as an instructor and another for Starfleet Command resigning his commission aboard the Enterprise.

He was aware that he had left it late to refuse the First Officer's position, but he anticipated Kirk would have little difficulty in locating a suitable replacement for the role. It had been a highly desirable post before Nero's attack, it would be doubly appealing now.

It was to Admiral Komack that he tendered his resignation as an instructor. The admiral did not appear surprised – he was undoubtedly aware that the Enterprise was due to depart the next day and had been expecting Spock's departure. Spock did not bother clarifying that he would not be leaving to serve upon the flagship. He would have to explain his decision to Starfleet Command and the Admiral would learn of it through them. Repeating it would serve no purpose, simply waste additional time on what was likely the last day he would be on the same planet at Nyota for some time.

He crossed the campus to the shuttle hanger intending to travel directly to Command at the Presidio across the bay. He had felt Nyota awaken some 48 minutes previously and was eager to return to her once he had tendered his resignation. He accessed a computer terminal on the hanger deck and determined when the next scheduled shuttle would cross the bay to headquarters.

There were few personnel in the hanger. He made his way towards the designated shuttle - 12091. The shuttle's door was open and awaiting passengers. A Vulcan was crossing the hanger bay alongside it. Spock regarded the figure curiously. The Vulcan had grey hair and appeared quite advanced in age. He was dressed in a practical variant of a traditional Vulcan robe. Clearly he was not a member of Starfleet.

Something about the tilt of his head and his gait struck Spock with an intense feeling of familiarity.

'Father?' he called out in inquiry even though he knew the hair was wrong and the man approximately 5cms too tall to be Sarek.

The Vulcan paused, tilted his head and slowly turned with an almost amused expression upon his face.

Spock felt an odd surge of recognition as the elder's face was revealed to him. He knew the man. Was absolutely certain of it, however he appeared to have… forgotten… who he was. Such a thing had never occurred to Spock before. His memory was infallible. He frowned slightly, felt himself turn his body, twist to get a clearer look at the man's face so he might identify him.

The elder spoke, his face expressive for Vulcan, his voice wry, amused.

'I, am not our father.'

Spock blinked, suddenly realising who the man was. Himself. He as staring at himself. From the future. This was the 'Spock' that Nero had so despised. The one who had found James Kirk upon Delta Vega. The 'Ambassador Spock' who's ship he'd piloted. His feelings were exceedingly conflicted. On the one hand he felt simple amazement as the unique position he was in, meeting… himself. But on the other, this man, this Spock, was he who'd brought red matter into the galaxy. Who'd given Nero the tool with which he destroyed his, their home-world.

He found himself walking forward towards him and forced himself to stop. The other Spock continued forwards.

'There are so few Vulcans left, we cannot afford to ignore each other.' A reasonable conclusion, but one reached rather belatedly. Where had this Spock been when he and James Kirk were attempting to stop Nero?

'Then why did you send Kirk aboard when you alone could have explained the truth?' he asked. He found he could not entirely keep the confusion and censure from his voice. With the insight of this Spock, defeating Nero would have been much easier. Far less risk would have been taken.

His counter-part appeared unconcerned by his tone. Unrepentant. 'Because you needed each other. I could not deprive you of the revelation of all that you could accomplish together. Of a friendship, that would define you both in ways you cannot yet realize.'

Spock knew he was frowning openly, but didn't care. What did it matter if this man knew his feelings? They were apparently the same person. His explanation was not satisfactory. He had risked Earth simply so that he and James Kirk would realise there was the potential for friendship between them? Not only did the risk seem wildly disproportionate to its pay off, it did not explain how he had managed to get James Kirk an 'arrogant, stubborn, insufferable ass' as Nyota put it, to go along with his plan.

'How did you persuade him to keep your secret?' he inquired.

'He inferred that universe ending paradoxes would ensue, should he break his promise.' the older Spock replied.

He had let Kirk believe to speak of him would somehow damage the fabric of space and time. Given Kirk's demonstrated lack of knowledge with regards to general relativity and related fields of physics, his confusion was unsurprising. 'You lied?' Spock accused him.

His counter-part shrugged. 'Oh, I… implied.' he replied, seeming almost pleased with himself.

Spock found a small smile tugged at his lips at his older self's odd, casual, humorous personality. It appeared he would become far more relaxed and human in his later years. This older Spock's actions had certainly not been the logical ones of a Vulcan. He'd taken a great risk - 'A gamble?' he asked.

'An act of faith.' he clarified using a phrase that again, was far more human than Vulcan. 'One I hope you'll repeat in the future at Starfleet.' he continued.

Spock felt his mild amusement drain away. The words he'd been repeating to himself for several days, those he would soon address to the Admirals of Starfleet Command came out of his mouth automatically. 'In the face of extinction it is only logical that I resign my Starfleet commission and help rebuild our race.'

'And yet you can be in two places at once.' his older-self pointed out calmly.

Spock froze as he pondered the implication of that simple sentence. It was factual. Through a series of exceedingly unlikely events, he did exist in two places at once. There were two S'ch T'gai Spocks. He was uncertain of how to respond to such a thing.

'I urge you to remain in Starfleet.' his counter-part continued. 'I've already located a suitable planet on which to establish a Vulcan colony.'

Spock wondered at that. It seemed, presumptuous. 'I am certain the High Council will be delighted to hear of this.' he remarked with something very close to sarcasm toning his words.

His older-self smiled, very widely for a Vulcan. Apparently Spock's tone amused him. 'I am 157 years old. I have seen much of this galaxy. In this regard I believe I can offer insight that would be advantageous to our people.'

Curiosity rose in Spock at his words. He was intrigued by thoughts of precisely what his counter-part had seen over his 157 years. He was aware that seeking such knowledge would be unwise however - would influence events as they were meant to unfold.

'Spock, in this case do yourself a favour. Put aside logic, do what feels right.' His words sounded like an odd mix of things his father and mother might have said. An amalgamation of Vulcan and human. He sounded utterly sure of himself, at peace. That was… encouraging. Spock found himself revealing things he would not usual voice to anyone save perhaps Nyota.

'I must admit resigning my commission, whilst logical, does not 'feel right' as you put it.' The elder Spock seemed pleased by his admission and Spock felt able to continue, albeit awkwardly and somewhat haltingly, 'I find the concept of being separated from my wife to be most... unsatisfactory.'

Transparent shock spread over the older Vulcan's face. 'You are bonded?' he asked in surprise.

Spock frowned. 'Yes.' he admitted. 'You… were not?'

His counter-part was slow in answer, no doubt being careful in what he said so as not to negatively affect future events in their now shared timeline. 'I did not bond until I was 104.' He paused. 'I am curious… T'Pring?'

Spock found himself equally intrigued. 'No. We severed our betrothal when I departed for Starfleet.'

The older Spock smiled slightly. 'Well of that I am pleased to hear.' He shook his head. 'A most logical woman, T'Pring.' His tone was ironic, but did not demonstrate particular animosity. Spock wondered at what had occurred between them in his timeline. Obviously they had not bonded either, but evidentially for different reasons.

Spock thought of T'Pring's odd communiqué. He needed to respond to it. Sooner rather than later. 'Indeed.' He replied coolly.

'If not T'Pring, and forgive me, but you would not have had a need to bond yet,' his counter-part said in obvious reference to pon'farr. '… might I inquire as to whom you are wed?'

Spock suddenly felt nervous. He had assumed that his counter-part would know, that Nyota Uhura and he would have loved one another regardless of whatever changes Nero had wrought when he destroyed the Kelvin. But perhaps not. Perhaps they had not even known one another... the thought was distressing. 'Nyota Uhura.' he replied.

The older Spock's eyebrows shot up towards his hair in shock before, to Spock's amazement, he smiled and let out a short exclamation that was almost a laugh. A very short truncated laugh, but laughter none the less.

'This seems to come as a surprise to you.' Spock remarked nonplussed.

'Indeed. Not an unpleasant one,' he offered by way of reassurance, ' - but a surprise none the less.' His expression softened. 'Nyota Uhura.' he said wistfully. 'A most admirable woman.'

Spock found the assessment somewhat lacking but it was acceptable enough. 'Indeed, and yet, judging from your reaction not your admirable woman.'

'No indeed. I was not acquainted with Nyota Uhura until stardate 2266 when she became chief communications officer of the Enterprise.'

Spock could not resist. 'Then you and Nyota were not...?' he asked.

His counter-part shook his head. 'I counted her as one of my closest companions, a life-long friend, but a friend only.' he paused, clearly thinking on what for him were ancient memories. 'She was one of the first humans to truly befriend me. There was no artifice to her. She was exceedingly pleasant company.'

Spock wondered at his counter-part's words. He recalled vividly his attraction to Nyota from their earliest acquaintance. Shan'hal'lak. The engulfment. Had this Spock not felt this? Or had he been able to repress his emotions? His supposed his control at 36 would be greater than at 24. It had taken quite extreme situations for him to admit his love for Nyota, situations that this Spock and his Nyota would not have experienced.

His older-self had a look of slight bemusement on his face. 'Bonded to a human woman at 28. Fascinating.' He was silent for a moment before he continued. 'From what I had heard of you, and from my own experiences, I had thought to find you set on following the Vulcan way absolutely.' He paused. 'I wonder if my words of encouragement were even required?'

'This shuttle departs for Starfleet Command in 3.8 minutes. It was my intention to tender the resignation of my commission.' Spock replied.

'Despite Lieutenant Uhura's imminent departure with the Enterprise?' his counter-part inquired.

Spock found himself frowning as all the complicated feelings he had over that departure rose up within him. He recalled the terrible p'pil'lay the previous evening. He was certain his distress was plain to the Vulcan standing before him. It was unlikely any other in the galaxy could read his expression as accurately. He found himself speaking, again, of things he would not usually discuss with anyone. 'She misunderstood my intentions with regards to rebuilding our race and requested p'pil'lay of me last night.'

'Then you are no longer bonded?' his older-self inquired quite gently.

'No. The severing, it caused Tel-has-mar (bond sickness). The shock very nearly killed Nyota. Grandmother was able to undo the damage, reform the bond. But…' Spock found vocalising the facts of the situation very different to voicing his feelings with regards to it. 'The thought of being parted from her for five years causes me excessive discomfort.'

'For p'pil'lay to cause such injury, I assume this marriage is not one based in logic or convenience?' the older Spock asked.

Spock let himself give his older-self a depreciating look at his exceedingly obvious observation. Impulsively he held out his hand, palm up, in a gesture of el'ru'esta (hand embrace) - a form of telepathic contact used amongst family members. The action was motivated as much by curiosity as a desire to explain without needing to verbalise his feelings. The older Spock raised an eyebrow but returned the gesture without hesitation. Evidently he was just as intrigued.

It was exceedingly odd. The older Spock's thoughts did not feel like own, there was no sense of feeling an echo or some sort of 'copy' of his mind through their fingers, but there was a very strange sense of familiarity. Rather like that he'd felt when he'd mistaken him for Sarek. They were both very curious, but attempting to restrain themselves. In that respect at least their thoughts were perfectly mirrored. Recalling his purpose for requesting telepathic contact, Spock let his older-self feel his bond to Nyota, his affection for her.

He felt the older Vulcan's surprise. He got the vague sense that although his older counter-part had bonded, what he shared with his wife (Saavik - half Romulan, half Vulcan, a lovely dark haired woman in a strange Starfleet Captain's uniform) whilst warm and affectionate, was quite shallow in comparison to that which he shared with Nyota. (Dan'Vansurik dan'taluhk dan'ashayam ashal-veh. - most-beautiful, most-precious, most-beloved darling-one.)

Heard through their fingers, his counter-part's voice sounded stronger, younger - more like his own. /k'hat'n'dlawa?/ he inquired in shock.

/yes./ Spock replied in kind before pulling his hand from the older Spock's and clasping it back behind his back.

His counter-part seemed to be in shock. After 6 seconds of silence he spoke again. 'If you resign your commission, chose your perceived duty to our race over Starfleet and her, then you are a fool.'

Spock raised an eyebrow at his almost confrontational tone but replied quite evenly. 'It occurs to me that owing to your far greater experience, you have more to offer our race than I. Since it would be unwise for us to interact more than necessary, it is therefore logical that I remain in Starfleet.'

'I must concur with your assessment of the situation. Commander.' came the amused reply. 'Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self-serving,' he lifted his hand into the ta'al, '...I shall simply say good luck.'

Spock returned the salute and watched the older Spock walk away in a mild state of shock. The shuttle was cycling its engines, preparing to take off. Spock looked at the open door for a moment, then turned and walked decisively out from the hanger.

.

.

Spock located his father in a meditation chamber within the Ambassador's private apartments at the Embassy. Nyota was not in the building. He had briefly contemplated reaching towards her with the tel'esta (bond-touch) to ascertain her location before he recalled that he could simply call her personal communicator. He felt decidedly foolish for not considering the obvious ahead of an obscure Vulcan telepathic technique he was not overly familiar with.

His father seemed unsurprised by his presence. He gestured for Spock to join him at the asenoi he knelt before. Spock did so, sinking to his knees directly across from him. His father's eyes flicked over his instructor's uniform expressionlessly.

'You have made your choice.' he intoned. Spock could detect nothing from his tone.

'I have father.' Spock replied.

'You have given much thought to this choice I hope.'

'Indeed I have father. I did not come to a decision until 49.2 minutes ago.'

Sarek inclined his head in apparent approval. 'Then you will remain Starfleet?' He did not sound displeased. He did not even sound resigned.

Spock tilted his head in surprise. 'Yes father. That is the decision at which I have arrived.'

'Logical.' Sarek replied serenely.

Spock frowned slightly. 'Forgive me, I am... confused at your reaction.'

'I have meditated upon the matter. It is the best choice.' Sarek said calmly, as if it was perfectly normal for him to speak of Starfleet in such a way, as if it had not been the cause of a 9.8 year rift between them.

'I am gratified we are in agreement, however unexpected that fact is.' Spock replied hoping his father would elaborate.

Sarek merely nodded. 'T'Pau informs me that your Nyota is undamaged. She saw to her this morning. She anticipates no lasting ill-effect to your p'pil'lay.'

Spock's confusion grew. Sarek was now speaking casually, in open acceptance, of his human wife. 'That is most pleasing news. I shall express my gratitude to Oko'mekh-il before I depart with the Enterprise.'

Curiously, Spock reached towards his father through their bond. He thought back on their interactions since he had beamed down to the Katric Ark. There had been some... change in his father. Even his earliest memories, of times during his childhood when their family had been most as ease, his father had not been as calm and as serene as he had of late. Given the terrible events of the last week and half, this made no sense.

Sarek reached back, neither eagerly or timidly, but instead with a certainty that spoke an implacable belief that Spock would not reject the contact. This too, was unlike his father. Spock had been distracted when last they had shared mental contact. In the transporter room aboard the Enterprise he had been having something of an emotional crisis. Traumatised Nyota had thought him. He had felt the change in his father at the time, but not noted the nature of that difference. Now, centred and in his right mind once more, (more or less the human in him wryly pointed out), it was plain.

Sarek carried a katra within his mind. Spock raised his eyebrow in query.

His father extended his left hand, palm up, in the el'ru'esta. Spock looked at his father's tanned hand for a long moment, thinking of when he himself had made the gesture less than an hour previously. Sarek did not react to his hesitation, again, he seemed utterly confident that he would not be rejected.

Spock reached out and pressed his fingers to his father's for the first time in a decade.

Sarek's mind sharpened, came into focus. The difference between him and his older counter-part was quite apparent. Sarek's mind was all serenity, logic, and peace. His thoughts were supremely confident, perfect. The logic that ran through his mind was flawless and the calm that knowledge afforded him was prodigious. Spock reeled in awe. Surak. His father carried the katra of Surak himself within him.

Spock could not commune with the katra of the ancient philosopher directly, but his father let him sense an echo of his thoughts. He felt a wave of cool approval. His father broke the connection, pulled his hand from beneath Spock's.

Shock. Awe.

Spock stared at his father silently for... he was uncertain of the exact period of time. Less than a minute, more than 30 seconds. Surak was the reason for his father's new found acceptance. Surak found his choices, found him to be satisfactory. It went against all of the aforementioned teachings, but Spock was forced to admit feelings of pride at the revelation.

A part of him wondered though - why would Surak approve of him? He was not even fully Vulcan. His confusion must have been evident to his father, since he spoke in response to it.

'Changes will have to be made if our people are to survive this hardship without falling back into the old ways.' Sarek said. 'It would be easy for us to do as our cousins did millennia ago, to become as the Romulans are. We must instead find our own path. Be more than Vulcan, yet still Vulcan remain.' Sarek paused and Spock wondered where his words came from, his father or the ancient katra he carried. 'You Spock, are proof that we can change, that a Vulcan can be more without being less.'

'I had always hoped you would be a symbol to our people Spock, proof that humans were not somehow less than us because they were different. This you have done, just not in the manner I anticipated. Spock - the disrespectful, emotionally compromised, half-breed son of Sarek and his outlandish, primitive human wife,' he continued voicing words that had followed Spock throughout his life on Vulcan, '- and James Kirk, an irrational and violently emotional human if ever I met one, saved Earth and the Federation itself from destruction. All that remains of Vulcan is thanks to Spock and Kirk.'

Spock stared at his father in stunned silence. He wondered at the strength of Surak's influence upon him for Sarek to voice such things.

'Commander Spock of Starfleet is a Vulcan that many already look to. Your mother suddenly finds she is Lady Amanda in more than just name. Those who would not even speak to her suddenly follow her every move, because she is your mother. T'Pau humbles herself before your human wife. And constantly I am asked of you, asked of my 'dan'osa-fu, zhel-lan Spohkh (most honourable son, Commander Spock)' or 'Opidsu Spohkh (Honourable Lord Spock).'

Spock was uncertain what he felt at his father's revelation. He was most definitely not comfortable being referred to as 'Opidsu' it was an ancient honorific, on par with S'haile in terms of respect, and not he felt, appropriate.

'Elder Sosik spoke of your p'pil'lay and I arose from my rest this morning to find 7 offers of marriage for you.' Sarek continued. 'T'Pau spent 8 years seeking a suitable mate for you, but none would have you with your human blood. Suddenly it matters not.'

'I assume you clarified the situation?' Spock inquired.

'You mother took care of that. She appeared to take enjoyment from the process and I saw no reason to deny her.' Sarek replied.

Spock could imagine the petty human delight she would have taken in returning the scorn he'd received over the years. He hoped she had restrained herself. Or at least, that was what he told himself.