Summary: Candace discovers that Janet is evil and contemplates telling Phineas. Janet tries to steal all the money in the Tri-State Area.

Mom Bust

*Street*

As she and Phineas walked to Janet's house, Candace sang, like she did in 'Phineas and Ferb: Christmas Vacation,' "Walkin' my brother, to his birth-mom's hou-ouse, so he can visit her. Singin' what I'm doin'-"

Phineas cut her off. "Why are you singing what you're doing?"

Candace shrugged, no longer singing. "I have no idea."

Phineas laughed. "You know something? You've been a lot more relaxed, since that whole boarding school incident (see 'The Best Adventure Ever' in my fic, "Calling Agent P")."

"Yeah. I guess since Mom knows about you and Ferb and your inventions, I've been able to just cool it. No more busting for me."

Phineas pointed at something off-screen. "Hey, there's Django! I'm gonna go say hi."

As he ran off, Candace called, "I'll be here." An explosion caught her off-guard. "What was that?'

A chihuahua in a fedora - that looked kind of like Isabella's dog - flew out of Janet's front door on a jetpack. Janet ran outside and called after it, "That's right. Fly away. But, know this: tomorrow, I'll have an even better plan! I'll take over this city, then the Tri-State Area, then the world! Okay, maybe the world's a little extreme, but I'm evil, so I'm bound to conquer something!"

Candace, mouth now agape, had heard her. No. It wasn't possible. Her little brother's birth-mother could not be evil... Could she?

"Okay, Candace." She started at her brother's voice. "Let's go see- There she is! Later, Candace!"

Phineas ran up to his birth-mother and wrapped his arms around her. Janet, laughing returned the embrace. "Hey, squirt."

Candace was still standing in that same spot, processing what had happened. Her eye began to twitch. "M-Miss Applebottom's e-evil? My brother's... Sh-sh-she... Old...busting...urge...returning..." She slapped herself in the face. "No! Candace Gertrude Flynn, you are a changed citizen. You are calm Candace. Calm Candace. You don't bust!" She turned right around and forced herself to walk home.

(This song is a parody of Unwanted by Avril Lavigne, which is currently stuck in my head.)

-Candace-

All...

I used to do was try to bust my brothers.

That's how I was...

But, everything that they'd build would just disappear.

Oh, yeah, yeah.

I wanted Mom to see it.

'Cause she wouldn't believe it.

Couldn't do it.

Wouldn't happen.

I could never seem to

Bust them...

Then, it happened.

They were busted.

I no longer bust...

There is just no point...

*Bedroom*

Perry was sound asleep on Phineas' bed when Candace barged in and shouted, "Perry, help!"

Startled awake, Perry exclaimed, "Roll-on deoterent!" He blinked at the panicking girl before him, stood up, put his fedora on, and asked in all seriousness, "What's going on, Candace?"

Candace took a deep, calming breath. "Sorry. Um, can I talk to you?"

Perry smiled, relaxing a little. "Of course, Candace. You can tell me anything."

Candace smiled back briefly and sat down beside him. "Well, you know how I stopped trying to bust Phineas and Ferb?"

Perry rolled his eyes knowingly. "You found someone new to bust, didn't you?"

"Well, yes. Yes, I did. A-and, this is someone Phineas likes a lot, and I don't want him to get hurt from this, but I over-heard this person saying that she'd do something tomorrow..."

Perry nodded in understanding. "I guess the best thing you can do is try to resist the temptation."

"Resist the temptation? Is that even possible?"

Perry's eyes became half-lidded. "Candace."

"Okay, you're right. I can do this." Candace stood up and raised her fist in determination. "I will not bust!"

"Atta girl!"

-The Next Day-

*Candace's Bedroom*

Perry entered to find Candace in a feetle position on her bed. "Um..." Perry had no idea how to react, despite knowing what this was about. "Do you mind if I use the lair entrance under your bed?"

"I will not bust!" Candace shouted, not paying any attention to the platypus.

An unnerved Perry said, "Well, that happened," then crawled under Candace's bed. After sliding down a tube, Perry landed on the floor. His chair was missing. "And, so did that." He stood up.

Major Monogram appeared on the monitor. "Hello, Agent P. Sorry about the distinct lack of chairs. Long story short, Jeremy is still kind of figuring this agency out... Anyway, I hope you enjoyed your day-off, yesterday, but evil never rests. Applebottom was spotted being carried out of the bank by security. Knowing her tendency to hold grudges, this cannot possibly lead to anything good. Go check it out."

Perry saluted. "Yes, sir. And, by the way, next time you see Jeremy, could you tell him his girlfriend is in Busting Purgatory? He'll know what it means."

*Applebottom Evil is Crazy*

"Seriously, jingle-people," Janet scolded towards the ceiling, "could you stop with the 'evil is crazy' thing? That's the second time you've sung that!"

Perry appeared out of no where and was immediately hit with a gigantic dollar-bill, which stuck him to the floor, like a blanket.

"Oh, there you are, Agent P. Like the new trap? Thought I'd start being a little more creative. Okay, so, long story short, I am no longer welcome in," a shot of the bank was shown, "the First National Danville Bank."

An upbeat jingle played: *The First National Danville Bank*

Janet continued, "They gave me my deposits back, but I didn't get any interest. And, I'm a little tight on funds, these days... So, I have," she showed off a large magnet hooked up to an even bigger clear container, "my money magnet. It'll attract all the cash in Danville and stick it in this big ol' box. Therefore, I'll be rich, everyone else will be broke, ex cetera, ex cetera."

*Backyard*

"Whatcha doin'?" Isabella asked, as the boys walked around in a circle.

Phineas stopped, and Ferb bumped into him. "We're testing Ferb's theory that walking in a circle helps you think," Phineas answered. "It must have worked, because I know what else we're gonna do, today. We're gonna build our own arcade!"

"Cool! Hey, where's Perry?"

*Living Room*

Candace's hand was on the handle, ready to open the sliding door, but she wasn't sure she could do this. "Oh, if I tell him, it'll break his heart. But, if I don't tell him, and he finds out for himself, it'll still break his heart." To her surprise, Jeremy - a welcome distraction - walked up to her. "Jeremy? What are you doing here?"

"I heard you were in 'Busting Purgatory,'" Jeremy answered, "so I thought I'd-"

Why did he have to mention busting. "I can't help myself." She threw open the sliding door and ran outside, shouting, "Phineas!"

Jeremy smiled fondly. "Ah, memories."

"Phineas, Phineas, Phineas!"

Phineas turned around at his sister's screams. "Hi, Candace. We were just about to-"

Candace wasn't listening. "Your birth-mom is evil! She's doing something evil right now! You've gotta see it!"

She hoisted her brother over her shoulder and ran off, ignoring Phineas' cry of, "Candace!"

*Outside Janet's House*

Candace ran up to the window. She brightened at seeing the invention inside, but she didn't see anyone with it. "Yes! I knew she was up to something." She turned around. "Phineas!"

*Inside Janet's House*

As Perry and Janet were fighting, they rolled into the money magnet, which dented and started sparking. They froze, Perry on top of Janet in a rather awkward position. The device vanished into a puff of smoke, as though it was never there to begin with.

They stared at the spot where the invention had been, neither of them quite sure how to respond. Perry broke the silence with, "Well, that happened."

"Yes," Janet responded. "Yes, it did. Um, am I the only one, who notices what position we're in?"

Blushing in embarrassment, Perry left.

*Outside*

Candace hadn't seen any of what had happened inside. "Phineas, come on!"

Phineas wasn't listening. He was busy laughing at the butterfly that was currently perched on his nose. "Check out this butterfly, Candace. Isn't is cute?"

Candace ran over and grabbed him. "Come on!" She dragged him to the window, the butterfly flying away. She gestured to the window. "See?" There was nothing there. Candace deflated. "But, but, but-"

Phineas smiled. "That's a very nice window, Candace."

Candace face-palmed. "Deja-vew."

The End

Candace has someone new to bust! Yay!

Okay, so summer is right around the corner, and I'm going to give you guys a little summer gift. If you have an idea for "Calling Back Agent P," PM it to me, and, if I like it, I'll post it! So, send in the summaries, folks, 'cause summer only lasts 104 days!

Review, PM, and other phrases!