After Marian's passing, the family left the hospital and went back to Kristin and Andrew's home. Regina stayed in a guest room there and did much of the caring for Roland while the family mourned over their loss. She offered to help Kristin organize the details of the funeral, and Kristin gladly accepted the help. The family had already taken care of most of the details previously, for they knew this day would come and they knew it was better to take care of them in advance than to wait until the day Marian died. Regina called the funeral home to inform them of Marian's passing and to schedule the funeral for that Friday.
The family was still in shock. Throughout Marian's entire illness, the family tried to prepare themselves for what they knew would come; nonetheless, nothing could've prepared them enough to face the death of someone so close.
Regina struggled within her own head as she watched the family grieve. Memories of her parents and their death flooded her mind and she couldn't get them out. Every night, when she was alone, she let her emotions go. She knew if she kept them bottled up, they'd eventually come bursting out at some point. So at night, she let herself drain the tears she was holding back that way she'd be less likely to cry in front of the family the next day. She needed to be strong for them, especially Robin. Robin had been her rock these past two months, and now it was her turn to return the favor.
The funeral was held at 1pm on Friday afternoon. The family was on edge and could barely fathom that they were about to bury Marian. They all piled into a limo and drove to the cemetery, with the casket in the car preceding them. Regina held onto Robin's hand and gave it gentle, reassuring squeezes here and there with a loving smile to go along with it. Though they were small gestures, and though it was an extremely tough day for him, Robin was grateful for Regina's actions. At times he'd give her a small grin in response, but very soon after, his face contorted into a frown again. Grief and pain evident in his features and in his body language.
When the limo reached its destination, the family filed out slowly and stood staring into the distance. Kristin held Roland in one arm, and clang onto Andrew with her other arm. Tears streamed down both of their faces. Robin had his arm around Regina's waist, and Regina wrapped both of hers around him, holding him closely to her. Her head buried in his neck as she breathed him in.
After a few seconds, Regina felt something wet drip onto her forehead. She tilted her head to see Robin's face scrunched up as if he was trying to force himself to stop crying, but failing horribly. She brought her hand to his cheek and softly wiped the tear drops away. She kissed his jaw and then his lips. When she pulled away, she saw his eyes. They looked as if they had been glazed over. Robin was so out of it, and so grieved that he couldn't even function. Regina moved so she was standing in front of him, still close, but now facing him instead being off to his side.
She stood on her toes and brought her hands to his face.
"Robin," she whispered. She got no reply. "Robin, look at me." Still no reply. "Robin look into my eyes. Look at me," she repeated. Finally she saw his eyes blink and shift to meet hers.
Piercing blue eyes were now staring into chocolate brown. Where before Robin was staring out into the cemetery, now he is staring into the eyes of his one true love. Both parties mesmerized by the other; completely captivated by each other, forgetting the circumstances of the day and the heartache that it brings.
"We'll get through this; together," she encouraged him.
"How can I be sure of that when right now? My heart feels like it's gone. I feel like I can't live or breathe or do anything," he cried.
She grabbed his hand and placed it over her heart. "Well if yours isn't functioning, use mine. Use my heart for the both of us. Live and breathe through me, with me," Regina replied.
Robin didn't smile, he couldn't get his mouth to form one, but deep within he was smiling. Regina always has a way with words. She knows how to encourage him, even if he doesn't realize he's being encouraged at the time. He leaned down and kissed her ever so softly before the reverend gestured for the family to make their way to the funeral ceremony.
Before they made their way there, Regina walked to Kristin and offered to hold Roland for her. Kristin was hesitant at first, because she wanted to hold onto her grandson and couldn't get herself to let go, but Andrew encouraged her to let Regina take the boy. So eventually, Kristin handed Roland over into Regina's arms. Regina walked back to Robin and held his hand in her free one. The family walked to the cemetery plot where Marian was to be buried. They sat down in a line of chairs that were lined up in front of the casket; Kristin next to Andrew, Robin next to Kristin, and Regina next to Robin with little Roland in her arms blissfully unaware of the event taking place.
The reverend began, "We are gathered here today, not to mourn the death of Marian, but to celebrate her life. We are here to remember her and rejoice in the time we had with her. Marian was a sweet young woman. I've known her since she was very little. I remember her when she was about 7 year's old, singing in the little kids' choir down at the church. She was the most precious sight to behold. Her face so radiant and her voice so beautiful. And I remember years down the road, marrying her and her beloved husband. And shortly thereafter, baptizing their precious son, Roland. Its memories like these that we shall never forget. Memories like these that we should hold in our hearts forever.
Yes, I admit, today is a tragic day. Today is the day we have dreaded for the past few months, and the reality we eagerly tried to ignore as time went on. Nothing I can say can take that pain away. However, if we strive to remember the positives of Marian's life today, we will find ourselves feeling uplifted. So let's do that. Marian wouldn't want us to mourn her death; she'd want us to celebrate her life. She'd want us to smile and not cry. So let's give her that. Let's bless her in that way."
After the reverend spoke, songs were sung and other friends and family gave touching speeches. A slideshow of pictures was displayed on a small TV, causing the family to weep and even laugh at times as they reminisced the memories that were being shown.
When the slideshow ended, the family stood from their chairs as Marian's casket was lowered into the ground. Robin held onto Regina and brought her into a hug. He held her closely, careful not to hurt Roland, and buried his face in her neck. Kristin did the same to Andrew. The family stood there for a while, but eventually got back in the car and were driven home.
When they got home, no one spoke. No one even ate. They all went into their respective rooms and stayed there the rest of the night.
Regina however, made Roland a bottle and fed him. When he finished eating, she burped him and changed his diaper and put on his pajamas. It wasn't night time, but it was his nap time. So she walked to the small nursery the Locksley's had made for him, and laid him down in his crib. The poor boy must've been exhausted, because he didn't cry at all. His eyes closed shut immediately. Regina leaned down and kissed his soft head.
"Goodnight little man. Sleep tight," she cooed.
She walked out of the nursery and into Robin's room. He was sitting straight up on the edge of the bed. His eyes were once again glazed over and he was motionless.
Regina walked over and knelt in front of him, placing her hands on his knees. But as soon as she did, Robin flinched and moved her hands off his legs. Regina's face contorted in confusion. He has never denied her attempts to comfort him before. He has never shoved her away. If anything, he's always pulled her closer. She attempted it one more time. She lifted her hands and tried to hold onto his, but before she could Robin stood up and walked to the bathroom and locked the door.
As soon as he shut the door, Robin slid down onto the floor and put his head in his hands. He felt numb. He couldn't cry, or speak, or move. Aside from the fact that he was breathing and his heart was beating, he was essentially lifeless.
"Robin?" he heard a soft voice beckon. "Robin are you ok?" she asked. Regina was sitting on the floor outside the bathroom with her ear pressed against the door.
He couldn't get himself to speak. His heart was telling him to respond, but his mind was stopping him.
"Robin, I know this isn't easy. I know what you're feeling," she paused and took a deep breath. "I understand how confusing all these emotions that are running through your body and mind are. You feel angry, bitter, sad, regretful, distraught, hopeless..." she trailed. "But most of all you feel numb. You've let yourself cry so much and feel the pain so much that your body is no numb to it all. You can't think, you can't move, you can't do anything."
Robin lifted his head from his hands and rested it against the door. He could hear her speaking, but was unable to respond. Any attempt he gave to speak failed.
"I learned this feeling at a very young age, and I'll never forget it," she sighed. "But you know what I'll also never forget?" she paused. "Coming out of it. When I finally reached a point where I could feel again and I could live again, I realized something. I realized that I came out of all of that as a stronger person. As hard as it is to think, and seemingly horrible to say, my parents death made me a stronger, more responsible person. Without it, who knows if I'd be the person I am today."
Tears were now streaming down not only her face, but Robin's as well.
"And you know what? You'll come out of this stronger too. You will realize at some point that you are a better person because of this. And whether you realize it or not right now, you are a father. You are a father to a beautiful baby boy who needs you as much as you need him. If you have nothing else to live for, live for him. Be strong for your son."
When she stopped speaking she waited a moment to see if he'd respond somehow, but he didn't; not in a way she could see anyway. She slowly stood up from the ground and walked out of the bedroom. She knew he needed space. She has been where he is. He needs time to process everything before he can engage in conversation and interact with others.
Robin spent most of the rest of the day in his bathroom or his bedroom. He didn't want to come out. He couldn't face people right now. So he stayed to himself.
Kristin and Andrew, on the other hand came out of their room. Regina told Kristin she'd make dinner for everyone and encouraged her to just sit down and relax. Kristin tried to get Regina to let her help, but Regina was insistent.
Regina made spaghetti for the family. She made plates for herself, Robin and his parents. After placing Kristin and Andrew's plates on the dining table, Regina brought a cup of water and a plate of spaghetti to Robin's room.
Without saying anything, she laid it on his nightstand, leaned over to kiss his forehead, and walked back out to the dining room. Her and Robin's parents sat relatively quiet at the table and ate their meal.
When everyone finished, Kristin and Andrew insisted on helping to clean up, and Regina let them. They worked together to clean dishes and wipe the table. After they were done, Kristin brought Regina in for an unexpected hug. She wrapped both of her arms around Regina and hugged her tight.
"Thank you, Regina," she said weakly.
Regina smiled and held onto Kristin. "No need to thank me. I'm doing this because I want to. I know what it's like losing a family member. I know it all too well. It's the least I could do to help you all during this time," Regina replied.
Kristin pulled back and smiled. "You really are a wonderful woman. Robin is a lucky man to have found you," she said sweetly.
Regina smiled and moved over to hug Andrew. "Well you raised an incredible man. I'll forever be grateful for that."
After their encounter, Regina walked to the nursery to get Roland. She fed him another bottle, and shortly after, she fed him a small jar of peas. When he was done eating, she brought him back to his crib and put him to bed. Again, the boy didn't make a sound when he was laid down. Regina kissed his head before leaving.
She then walked back to Robin's room. He was now lying down on the bed, leaning up on his left side, facing the door. Regina quietly walked in and picked up his empty plate. She smiled when she saw it, because she was thrilled that he actually ate. When she went through the loss of her parents she hardly ate, and she reaped the consequences of that. So she was glad to see Robin wasn't doing that. She began to walk away but then she heard him.
"Stay," he said faintly, almost too quiet for anyone to hear.
Regina turned around to face him with her eyes wide. "What?" she heard him speak but didn't quite catch what he said.
"Stay," he repeated slightly louder.
Regina smiled and walked back over. She set the plate back down on the nightstand. She felt Robin's hand on her arm pulling her to him. She took that as a plea for her to lay with him. So she crawled into bed and laid beside him. Robin wrapped his arms around her tiny waist, and Regina wrapped hers around his waist as well.
They were pressed close together, Regina able to feel every muscle in his toned chest. She pressed her head into the crook of his neck. They laid their motionless and speechless; neither of them feeling the need to speak. Robin just couldn't get himself to talk, and Regina not wanting to force him to speak.
They lay there, in the arms of their beloved. Nothing else was needed in that moment. Comfort and peace filled their bodies, and for the first time in several days, Robin felt calm. He was at home being with her, the one he loves, as was Regina with him. They lay there the rest of the night; both eventually drifting off to a dreamless, motionless sleep while being warmed and comforted by the touch of the other.