After Brown had left my apartment, I got up, closed the door, locked it, and sat myself down on my couch. The anger over how my life was going was still there, but I felt like it waning as it was starting to go back to normal. I looked over the back of the couch to the wall where I had thrown the bowl, soup ran in little streams down the wall and shattered pieces of bowl were everywhere on the floor. The crash of the bowl against the wall had felt good, but it was gonna take a lot to get out all that I had eating away at me.

Once I sat there and calmed, thoughts of what Brown had said about Stephanie entered my mind. He had told me stuff that I'd been trying to figure out for a while without hurting the trust Steph had put in him.

"She was the first one on the scene" he said and I thought back to that night. I haven't really talked about the kidnapping or the beating to anyone other than Ranger and Lester who were in my hospital room. When I began telling about the beating, Steph got up from my bed and walked away form everyone. When I was tossed or thrown out of my captors car, I can't remember a lot but I do remember a females voice that seemed familiar to me and it was screaming my name. I thought the voice sounded like Steph, but I wasn't sure of anything but the pain.

"She was the one that alerted us that you were there" Brown said and I searched my mind again and remembered hearing her yelling to go get Ranger and Bobby now and to call nine one one.

"And she begged you to hold on and that help was on the way" he said and I remembered being in tremendous pain laying on something very cold and very hard and then felt my head being lifted and placed on something warm and soft as the voice encouraged me to hang on that help was coming as the sound of boots thundering towards us filled the air and sirens were blaring in the distance.

"Shit" I said realizing it was Steph that was there, she was the voice I kept hearing. What she must have seen and what she must have heard, I can't even imagine what it must have been like for her. She must have been the one to lift my head and then by doing that got my blood on her and that how she was covered. A lot of the questions about her weird behaviors were answered, but a lot of other pieces like how was she the first one on the scene were still missing. I needed to talk to her and I needed her to talk to me.

Getting up, I felt horrible about what I had said and done to her. I never meant to hurt her; I had on several occasions stopped the attack when I was angry because it was her. I know she didn't mean to spill the soup in my lap; it was just the straw that had broken the camels back. I am sorry for what I'd done and I needed to go and find her. I knew with her being so upset, Brown would not have let her leave the building, opening my door I walked up the hall and knocked on his door.

"What?" Brown growled when he opened his door

"Is Steph here?" I asked. Bobby crossed his arms over his chest and stared at me from his spot in the middle of his doorway. Steph is close to most of the core team and if she had to stay here I knew it would be with one of us. With me being the one who had hurt her and Ranger and Santos gone, thank God, Bobby was the only one of the team left she could go too. Figuring he was my best bet, I'd come to him.

Brown stared at me and then looked me up and down "I gave her a sleeping pill about ten minutes ago; she finally agreed to take one"

"Is she still awake, can I see her/" I asked. Bobby sighed and I waited for him to tell me to get lost, but surprisingly he stepped aside and motioned me in.

"You upset her casts or not, I'll kick your ass" he said closing his door "She's in my room"

I nodded my head telling Bobby that I had heard him loud and clear, he had every right to threaten me. When I got to his door, I turned back and looked up the hall to see Bobby standing at the end of his living room looking at me, letting out a slow breath I opened the door and went inside.

"Steph" I said seeing her curled up in the middle of Bobby's bed. Before I had a chance to do or say anything, a wave of jealously washed over me because Steph had been practically living in my bed with me. Shaking the stupid thoughts away to deal with later, I walked across the dimly lit room to the side of the bed were I sat down. It struck me suddenly as I moved some curls out of her face that the shoe was now on the other foot as our positions were now changed. Steph had always came in to my room to check on me and now here I was doing kinda the same thing.

"I don't know if you can hear me in sleep like I did when I was in my coma, but I am sorry for tonight and I would love for us to talk" I told her sleeping form. I watched over her a few minutes and then decided that it was time for me to go, leaning over I kissed her temple, wished her a good sleep, and left the room.

"You know" Bobby said from his kitchen as I re-entered his living room "she is one remarkable woman"

"Yea I am beginning to really see that" I told him. I had already known she was a great person, Steph had accepted us warts and all and she brightens our world when we can only see the darkness. But for her to be the one to have been there when this whole nightmare began was something else entirely.

"I hope you do and know how lucky you are"

"Because Ranger and Santos aren't here?" I asked knowing how much she meant to them

"No because I'm just as lethal, but because in spite of what you did tonight she has already forgave you" he said and I stood there blinking in shock.

"Forgave me?"

"Before I gave her the pill to take she made me promise not to go over and kill you when she fell asleep" he said leaning against his sink.

"And you promised her?"

"Of course" he said letting me know that the curly brunette gets to him like she does to us all.

"For some reason she likes you and knows that the outburst didn't really have anything to do with her"

"It didn't you know" I told him

"I know, but still…" he left off

"I know" I told him and he nodded his head

"She and I need to talk"

"That's probably a good idea, just get everything over and back on track before Ranger and Santos gets back" he said and I understood his warning.

I left Browns place trapped in my own head. My thoughts were going everywhere with the things I'd learned about Stephanie. She truly amazed me for forgiving me and understanding that it wasn't her that made me lash out. I had to talk to her tomorrow and apologize, she had to know how truly sorry I am.