"Everyone hold on." The Doctor said before he slapped the vortex manipulator on his wrist. A second later we appeared in the Tardis. My body was getting used to these little jaunts through space, or at least it had stopped purging everything in my stomach when we landed. It was a step in the right direction. Still not 100% with it though, because the only thing keeping me upright was my death-grip on Oswin's metal shell.
"Martha, we're through." The Doctor let go of Oswin and crossed to the console.
"All clear then," Martha's voice came through the intercom and the Doctor brought her image up onto the monitor. "I'll flash by Torchwood's satellites to give them something to chase."
"Mind they don't actually catch you." The Doctor clucked like a fussy librarian.
Martha grinned. "Don't plan on it." She struck me as the sort of woman who had her shit together. Our escape plan went infinitely smoother because she'd managed to break into, and then pilot, one of the Torchwood transport ships. That was the sort of skill set that looked real impressive on your resume. It didn't seem like she needed any of the Doctor's, however well-intended, advice.
Actually, it struck me now that maybe I'd gotten back on the wrong ship. But the Doctor had the vortex manipulator, which seemed sort of crucial to my whole 'getting back home' plan that had been effectively stalled. Maybe if I beaned him over the head and just took it-
"And Doctor?" Martha's voice yanked me from my violent plotting. "Thank you."
It looked like she had stunned him. It was hard to tell if it was because he wasn't used to being thanked, or he wasn't used to doing things that got people thanked in the first place.
He swallowed hard, and suddenly focused his attention on turning several knobs on the console instead of looking directly at the monitor. Knobs I'm sure that did absolutely nothing.
"Try to stay out of trouble, Lieutenant." He said gruffly. It was nice to know "emotionally stunted" was a common trait among time lords. Bunch of idiots.
"Yes sir," Martha gave a mock salute. "Say thanks to the rest of them too. Don't want you getting all the credit." The Doctor glanced at the screen again and gave a short nod. Martha's smile faded somewhat, and then she reached forward and severed the connection.
"Well, I like her." It was too late to clobber the Doctor and hijack the manipulator, but it was important for him to know that I had considered it.
"She is quite a lady." Oswin said.
He shot me an exasperated look as he turned off the monitor. "So pleased to know you approve." His tone wasn't quite as nasty as it had been prior to us breaking into the torture prison to help Leo escape with Martha. Hold on to your pants folks, but he might actually be warming up to me. If he didn't threaten to leave me on a deserted planet in the next ten minutes, I was going to update our relationship status to 'acquaintances'.
"We're going to need jackets. Exceptionally warm jackets." He said, frowning in thought. This time his movements on the console had purpose. We were headed somewhere, and I got the feeling it wasn't 'home'.
"I'll take a look," Max said, clearly eager to do something. She'd been particularly quiet, probably from the lingering guilt of getting me shot. Okay, technically I got myself shot. But if I'd known I was infiltrating a prison with a glorified filing cabinet I would have been more careful. The point was, I was definitely holding it against her. Mostly.
"Down the hall," the Doctor didn't even bother looking up. "Wardrobe will be the first or second door."
Max hustled down the hallway and my arm still ached enough that standing very still was almost more effort than I wanted to expend, so I stayed where I was.
"You need patching up?" It took me a moment to realize the Doctor had slid his gaze toward me and was asking a genuine question. The ship groaned and wheezed softly around us, suggesting we were on the move.
"Don't suppose we're headed to a hospital?" I glanced down at the bandage that was still wrapped tight around my upper arm. It hadn't bled through, but then that's probably just because a laser had effectively melted through my skin instead of just tearing through it. Even thinking about that sent a sharp pang throug my shoulder, reminding me how important it was to my pain receptors that my arm just lay uselessly at my side.
"Haven't really got the time." He grimaced. He almost looked sorry.
"Then it can probably wait." If anyone was going to tend my wound, I was going to need pain killers, and lots of them.
The Doctor walked over, giving the bandage a once over, but careful not to touch it. "She didn't do half a bad job," he admitted when his inspection had been complete. "Nor did you." He met my gaze briefly.
"Was that an admission of approval?" The idiot grin on my face brought an immediate scowl to his.
"Don't get excited. It was a miracle you didn't bring every soldier in the complex down with your little gun fight."
"If that's your version of 'excellent work', it could use some improvement."
"I hardly thing acknowledging you've not done a bad job is worthy of excellence-"
"I recorded it," Oswin said proudly. "If you'd like to review it later. It may have been difficult to discern to the casual observer, but if you consider his usual tone, he sounded positively cheery."
"I knew it!" I started to pump my fist into the air but the sudden and violent flood of pain that ripped through my shoulder put that to an immediate stop.
"Yes, all right." He rolled his eyes at the both of us. It was nice to have the sassy bucket in my corner. "I was just surprised is all."
"Because I'm the worst." I scoffed.
"Exactly," he didn't sound like he was kidding. "Still, you may want to clean up a bit along your temple there." He gestured along the left side of my face. I hadn't gotten a chance to inspect the rest of the damage and since it was nowhere near the pain in my shoulder, I hadn't been too worried about it.
A ginger probing near my cheekbone caused me to hiss in a sharp breath. It stung like a bitch. It felt like a long wound that extended back to my temple. It was deep enough to have bled and effectively superglued my glasses to my face. That was probably something I was going to have to deal with. Ideally later, when I wasn't already exhausted and in tremendous pain. So I just wouldn't remove my glasses for a few days. If we lasted that long.
"Didn't ruin my good looks did it?" I asked, trying to disguise the grimace that had followed my attempts to shift my frames.
"Perhaps you'll have to rely on your winning personality from now on."
"Was that a joke he just made?" Apparently helping Martha had managed to put captain grumpy pants into a good mood. I never thought I'd live to see the day. I turned to Oswin. "Did you get that recorded too?"
"Perhaps you'll have to rely on your winning personality from now on." A slightly tinny version of the Doctor's voice emitted from Oswin, followed by a painfully faked laugh track.
The Doctor shot me a dark look.
"I know," I sighed, struggling to hide my amusement. "Disagreeable behavior gets me thrown onto a flesh eating planet. I got the memo."
"Well, it's nice to know you've been paying attention."
"I don't suppose there's a chance," I glanced back down the hallway to see if Max had returned. "That we don't have time to go to a hospital because you're in a great big rush to get us home?"
His face fell, and I could already see the answer played out. Whatever we were hustling to do, it wasn't to improve my day. "We've arrived at Trenzalor." He said, his voice hollow.
"I suppose that's not the planet I'm hoping for?" All I remembered about the landing site was that it was orange and dusty. Probably should figure out the name at some point. You know, if I lived long enough to get there.
"It's not a planet at all, technically. Trenzalor is just a coded set of coordinates." He pulled up the monitor and I could see whatever it was trying to display, was replaced by irregular static. "It's the heart of the universe."
That sounded dramatic. And also unhelpfully vague. "And… is that supposed to mean something?"
"It's the place where every single moment in time converges. It's a hyper-condensed micro-accumulation of every point in past, present, and future. And there's a rift smack dab in the middle of it."
"To be fair," Oswin chimed in. "The rift has been there for quite some time. He's just been ignoring it."
"Yes, but the heart is constructed of antimatter, which makes the rift inconsequential to its existence." The Doctor gave Oswin a sharp look. It seemed like he'd been ignoring all sorts of nightmares in this universe. Probably because there were too many to count. But it was nice to know Oswin had been vocal about it. "But something's coming through now." He swallowed, returning his gaze to me. "Something that could tear the whole universe apart if we don't stop it."
"Oh, so no biggie then?" I tried to keep my voice light, but it was made more difficult by his utter seriousness.
"I could take you home," he said, his eyes were strangely distant. "If you like. I could take you both home. It would be the last thing I do."
There was a long and heavy pause.
"Wait, I'm sorry, are you actual asking me?" I thought it was just one of those 'I coulda been a contender' kind of speeches, but when he didn't continue, I started to have my doubts.
"Yes," his voice rasped. "I might not be able to- to stop this thing. These last few decades have… well they haven't been especially forgiving."
"Doctor-" Oswin tried to interrupt him, but he silenced her with a gesture.
"It's just as likely that I fail. That the whole universe will come crashing down around us because I couldn't stop it from happening. But I could get you home. You would fall safely on the other side of the door that dropped you here. You and Max, you could go back living in this universe you came from. Forget you were ever here." He stared at me and for a moment I could see every single mistake he'd made over the years etched deep into the lines of his face. This man was nothing like the Doctor. But it wasn't just because he reminded me of soggy toast, it was because things had happened, bad things. The kind of things that wreck a person permanently.
He was genuinely asking me if I wanted him to take me home now, because he had no idea if he was going to be able to do it after.
"I'm not-" my breath caught in my throat. Part of me wanted to shake him. Yes! Take me home! Your universe is shit and I don't belong here! It took me longer than I'd like to stifle that thought enough to know that it wouldn't be the first thing I was going to say when my mouth opened next. "Look, it sucks that you've had a tough time of things, but that doesn't make everyone on this ship a toad. I'm not going to ask you for a ride home if that means everyone and everything in this universe dies." But I desperately want to anyway. "Listen," I wrestled my thoughts once more. Pep talks weren't really my forte, and they were probably less effective if I couldn't convince even myself this was the right thing to do. "When we met, you told me you were the Doctor. I've seen hints of it, but nothing all that convincing. So if you want me to believe that crock of shit, you better cowboy the fuck up because if I have to slap sense into you myself, it's going to hurt my arm tremendously and I'm not really in the mood for it." Not my best work. In my defense, it really would hurt to slap him. Probably have to get Max to do it. For an intern, she was built and I was pretty sure it would only take one or two strikes to drive the point home.
Oswin's eyestalk spun toward the Doctor as if to say 'I told you so.' He looked startled, and then almost disappointed. But that look vanished before I could be sure and he nodded.
"Right then," he took a deep breath and straightened his jacket. Max walked back down the hallway, her arms overflowing with brightly colored parkas.
"He tell you why we need jackets?" Max asked, she didn't look especially pleased to be preparing for the cold.
"We're going to save the universe." The Doctor said in a voice that almost made me believe. Almost. "Allons-y."