And I'm back with another extremely long and contrived chapter! Okay, this one's pretty creepy so don't say I didn't warn you. If you will not like, I will not blame you, it's far too weird. And it's a bit different in some ways.

On another topic, thank you so much for all your Happy Birthday wishes! It really felt sweet:) I had a nice birthday thanks to my family, friends and you guys too. Also, thanks for reviewing and sticking to this bizarre story. And loads of thanks to my anonymous reviewers Oola, Olivia, Morgana, ridda, rose for their kind and thoughtful reviews.

Now unto the chapter!

I'm so tired of playing
Playing with this bow and arrow
Gonna give my heart away
Leave it to the other girls to play
For I've been a temptress too long

Give me a reason to love you
Give me a reason to be a woman
I just wanna be a woman

Portishead - Glory Box

Chapter 14: God only knows

'…and this is for you!'

'Vicky, you really didn't have to…'I mumbled as I took the package from her hands. I untied it nervously.

It was a hat. But not just an ordinary hat. It was a lovely green, tweed hat, the kind I had always seen women wear in Singing in the Rain.

'It's beautiful, thanks so much!' I said hugging her.

Seeing her now, I realized how much I had missed her the past week.

She looked as fresh as a daisy. Her hair ran down her back in rivulets of curls and her smile made me smile.

I also gave her my present which was a pair of black gloves I had bought some time ago but which she could use more than I did. I never really wore any gloves. And she loved them. She had an entire collection.

We stood up all night talking on her bed.

I was wearing the green hat, she the gloves and we were both sipping a tiny bit of champagne Vicky had somehow managed to smuggle in Hogwarts. I had no idea how she had done it. But it was very good. And we were really enjoying ourselves.

'Father made a fool of himself at the Christmas Party, he was doing an impression of a reindeer and it all went wrong when my uncle pretended to be Santa Clause and wanted to harness him. Everyone was rolling on the floor, laughing.'

'Sounds like loads of fun.'

'Try mortification more likely,' she replied, but she was giggling too. 'You should have seen the chase around the room.'

'You should have filmed it.'

'What does that mean?' she asked confused.

'Sorry, I forget you're not well acquainted with my world,' I said, smiling.

'So, how was Christmas with Dumbledore? I'm dying to hear. Was it creepy? Does he really wear those robes all the time? Does he live like a hermit?'

'Wow, wow, one question at a time,' I told her, taking another strong gulp of champagne.

'It was…a very interesting Christmas, I'll say that. He's a very peculiar man. You wouldn't believe the way he lives. He definitely has company and comfort. And he doesn't wear robes all the time, unfortunately. I had to see him in yellow slippers, not a nice memory.'

Vicky started laughing, holding her stomach.

'Yellow slippers? Oh, you're so lucky Jane! I would've loved to see that! You say he has company?'

'Well…this better remain between us, but he does have female company, if you know what I mean.'

Vicky put her hand to her mouth in shock.

'No! Dumbledore? Our Dumbledore? You have got to be joking! We all thought he was a bit queer. Or maybe the right word is sexually confused.'

'Are you trying to tell me you thought he was gay?' I asked, raising a brow.

'No, Jane, he's always merry and happy, what I mean is…'

'Homosexual then?'

'Yes, that's the word. We were all convinced he liked other men.'

'Maybe he likes to keep that appearance, but he leads a completely different life.'

'Wow, he's even more interesting now. I mean female company, yellow slippers…what else?'

'Oh, did I mention he had his hair up in a ponytail?'

Vicky almost fell out of her bed.

'Get out of here! I knew coming back here was worth it! This is too funny!'

She spilt her champagne glass on the floor and we both started giggling again. It was good to forget about some things and just relax for a change.

I wasn't going to tell her about my freak out and the way I ran from Dumbledore's house in the middle of the night like a crazy person.

I just clung to the good memories like glue.

There was still the after Christmas blues for everyone. This is a very depressing syndrome. Everyone is a victim. You can't help but feel it, no matter how bad your Christmas was.

Every kid came back with a sad smile on his faces. The majority of the first classes went on in a languid, soporific way. They glided down our minds like snowballs as we slouched in our chairs, with the books on our chins, thinking about tomorrow.

I was trying to focus, but my mind rested adamantly on Dumbledore.

His words were like a chant for me, the words that I woke up with in the morning and went to bed at night.

He was going to help me by not helping me. He was going to leave me to the dogs. He was never going to give me a Time-Turner. And what was worse, he didn't understand. How could he though? Maybe I was expecting too much from him. I was expecting him to be one step ahead, but this time, I was the one that was forward.

And it killed me that he couldn't understand. I knew he was stubborn, I could see it. When he had something on his mind, he did not relent.

Now he had it going that there was a meaning behind this accident, that I was supposed to come here. It felt like a badly written romance. And I'd suspect Dumbledore to be a fan of those. Usually, in these literary pieces, there is some crap about the heroine being the descendant of I don't know what all-powerful, sexy deity, but it's all resolved at the end when she reunites with her past-soul-mate, a very handsome, musky version of Brad Pitt. It's all very gaudy.

And that's not what happened here. First off, I don't like Brad Pitt, second, I think that flipping a damn Time-Turner that was coincidentally found in the Department of Mysteries (therefore, there could be something seriously wrong with it, tampered with Dark Magic) doesn't mean that I am meant to stay here and be the Slytherins' fun toy.

And what am I really supposed to do? Try and stop Riddle here? This is the past. How could I influence the future without doing some massive damage? I have already done enough.

I have to go back and do my job there. Staying here is wasting precious time and frankly, precious sanity as well. I wouldn't be able to convince Riddle to give up being a power-hungry idiot. And I wouldn't be able to stop him once he started. It's just his nature.

People don't really change.

Why did Dumbledore have to be so stubborn?

Sitting in class, hearing professor Binns rant away, I had a clear image of my life. Looking out the window, I saw a brown leaf on the snowy ground.

By some miraculous chance, that leaf hadn't been torn apart and buried under the cold blanket. It was lying there peacefully, winking at me.

I don't know why, but I felt like that leaf. I could feel the cold and I could see the sky between the branches and I felt very little and brown, taken from one place to another, never finding a resting place.

It was nice to run from one corner to another, but it was nice to settle down and sleep a little bit too. It was nice to believe I was in a safe place and that it was up to me if I wanted to get up and leave.

Did he not think I had tortured myself trying to find an answer why I was here? Maybe I was narrow-minded not to believe in destiny. After all, Dumbledore knew better than me. Was I just alluding myself?

No. I stick to my convictions.

Trying to find a magical reason that went beyond logics just made it more difficult, it made it sound romantic and mysterious, but it was just plain stupid. It's what humans do when they get bored with their lives, they invent secret meanings.

That's what this was? A secret meaning behind it all?

No, it was just a desperate move that I did right before getting killed. The Time-Turner malfunctioned big time and I ended up here.

Maybe it had been a trap set up by the Death Eaters. They're not the most intelligent fellows.

Maybe I just wasn't supposed to die.

Can't life throw you in absurd situations without any sense or reason?

Can't life do that without any silly meaning behind it?

Isn't that life's job?

But whatever the reason, whatever really happened, it wasn't something mystical, it wasn't fate.

People just have to learn to get disillusioned.

It's the best for all of us.

Something out of this world happened during Defense against the Dark Arts.

I think I almost had a taste of Riddle's thoughts.

We were dueling on pairs and after having succeeded in disarming my partner, Robert Blowsworth, I was given Riddle's partner, Black. We both disarmed ourselves at the same time.

After that I had to face Riddle himself.

He looked ready to squish me happily, or at least he looked pleased. I guess he wanted to show me he was far superior in battle.

And he was unfortunately.

After five minutes I was ready to give in.

But as I blasted a curse towards him a sudden delirious idea entered my head.

While casting the second audible curse, I also cast an inaudible Legilimens, pointing to his head.

I don't know why I did it. It had just come into my mind.

And I did it without remorse, with a patient eagerness, if there is such a thing.

For a brief, lucid half-moment I could sense it, a web of candy-coated, poisonous tongues that ran through my mind and tickled my pride.

The skies opened.

There was a precipice in front of me leading to him.

Deep, deep down I could see his mind.

His thoughts were floating like blue drops of ocean water. It was a blue, shimmering river of salty water, of rough, crystallized water.

The breeze was noxious, my nostrils were burning.

There was no sun.

I wanted to jump and swim in the river. I wanted to drink it up and wash away some of my weights. It looked like a haven. Oh, it looked so nice.

But there were flames all around the precipice. And if I tried passing through them, I slowly felt my mind and conscience leaving me.

I slowly felt my thoughts burning and disintegrating into tiny particles of golden ash.

And suddenly I was pushed back by a heavy wind.

It was a curse he had thrown back at me.

I fell down and winced in pain.

I felt the cold floor and there was no precipice in front of me.

Only the boy that looked at me suspiciously, his wand drawn.

His eyes pierced mine trying to find an answer, but I shook my head and grimaced in pain. I slowly got up, holding onto a desk.

I massaged my wrists, looking down.

'Are you ready to go on?' he asked, cocking his head to the side. He was smirking, slightly.

I think he knew I had tried seeing his mind. He looked smug.

His eyes were telling me "Like you could ever do that. Like you could ever pass those flames."

'No,' I answered, 'I can't go on. I need to rest.'

I looked at him with all the honesty I could gather.

And then I got something in return which baffled me. His eyes told me something different, something that scared me.

He was telling me, as best as he could, "Sometimes, I can't pass the flames either."

The shock of it hit me in waves.

My eyebrows questioned this information in disbelief, but he almost nodded his head, acknowledging my discovery.

He had voluntarily put up a wall between him and his conscience. Memory, regret, guilt, there were all thrown into the flames, disintegrated, turned into golden ash, swallowed in a river of pure knowledge, a river that was stained, that looked like it was shimmering…

I suddenly felt this warm, astral connection with my mind that made me sigh with relief. I could go there, I could go and feel whatever I wanted, I could never put a barrier to my conscience.

His freedom scared me.

I wanted his mind to be caged, I wanted him to be caged.

When I was around him, my whole world started bringing out new shades that I had never seen before.

I was scared of those shades. What did they mean?

Could I ever see through them?

What was behind them? What was behind his mind?

He had asked me if I envied it, if I envied this state of simply not caring and I hadn't answered. But did I really want to swim in that river?

Was I so well adjusted? Let's face it, I could have used a wall too.

I could have used one at least for a night or two, so I could get some rest without thinking of the people I had left behind.

He broke contact with me abruptly and left.

I was still standing by the desk, wand in my hand. That river ran through me and choked me with tears.

But I still breathed.

I just felt a terrible wish to know more. Since I could remember, curiosity had tormented me. As always, I wanted to cut off the strings and see the hands that really guided the show.

I wanted to see the world he had in there, locked up from everyone else.

It was better than a library, it felt better than a haven.

It was such an amazing thing… it was the other side of the moon.

I thought I'd get over my silly obsessions once I had some lunch or took a nap. I went through the day normally, chatting with the girls, eating my pudding, trying to master a new charm in Charms Class, thinking about Dumbledore, but ever so often, the river came towards me and then I couldn't get the golden ash out anymore.

I was incredibly thirsty for something.

I drank all the pumpkin juice I could find, but I was feeling more thirst now.

I sat on my bed and imagined being home.

And when I imagined home, I saw it beyond a river. I still had to cross a river.

I couldn't give it up!

I needed to know more.

I slowly opened my trunk. I pushed away the clothes and took out the old parchments.

My fingers rested on the smooth surface and I closed my eyes.

Should I write in it? Should I summon Salazar?

I hadn't talked to him in such a long time.

Would he take my blood again? Did I need to talk to him?

Would he give me the questions? Would he give me the answers?

I took the quill in my hand. My fingers trembled.

A drop of ink fell on the parchment and disappeared.

'Writing your homework?'

I almost dropped the parchments in my fright. I looked over my shoulder alarmed.

It was Bridget and Lucille.

'Hi girls…no, I'm just, looking through my trunk,' I answered pushing the parchments away.

'We just wanted to ask you, have you seen Victoria? We've been looking for her everywhere. Catherine is outside, checking the grounds. We don't want to get seriously worried, but we might unless we find her. You should help us, Jane.'

I looked at them, blinking confused. Their carefully crafted sentences never made sense to me.

'You can't find her?'

'She's nowhere in sight. We looked in all the places we thought she would be.'

'How about the places she wouldn't be?'

'Oh…we didn't check those, why would we?' they answered, shrugging their shoulders.

I groaned and got up.

'Come on, we have to look better. She's around here somewhere. If we don't find her, we go to Slughorn.'

We started with all the classes. She was not in any of them. Then we checked all the bathrooms on all the floors.

Of course she wasn't there either.

'What about the Prefect bathroom?' I asked.

'What about it?' Lucille asked as if it was very stupid of me to inquire.

'What if she's there? We should try to check,' I said.

'But why would she be there? Vicky doesn't know the password and she's not allowed to go there.'

'Maybe someone gave her the password,' I countered.

'But how will we get in?' Bridget moaned.

I rolled my eyes in exasperation.

'Earth to the wonder girls, I'm a Prefect! Geez, it's really hard to remember, isn't it?'

When we reached the bathroom, I mumbled the password half inaudibly and the portrait swung open.

At first, as we stepped inside, there was nothing strange about it.

The marble floor was clean, there were some towels in one corner, then there was that awful mermaid…

The girls all shrieked.

The tub was filled with green water and white foam but there was a small figure visible underneath the foam. We ran towards it and Lucille and Bridget both pulled out an unconscious Victoria.

My heart almost stopped.

We lay her to the ground carefully and we checked her heart.

She thankfully had a pulse. A weak one, but still a pulse.

She looked blue all over. And she seemed in some sort of pain, her forehead was full of wrinkles.

I quickly cast some revival spells, my wand trembling, and after what felt like years, I finally saw her eyelids flutter open.

By now, we had put her on the small sofa in the corner and we had covered her with towels.

'Vicky? Vicky can you hear me? Are you alright?'

It took some moments for her to come round. She opened her eyes widely and stared at us, dumbfounded.

Then she turned over and started coughing up water like crazy.

'Let it out,' I told her, beating her back. 'Let it all out.'

When she stopped, she fell back on the couch and started breathing heavily.

'What happened?' she managed to say.

'We found you in the tub, half-dead!' Lucille squeaked, looking downcast.

'What are you doing in the Prefect bathroom? Who did this?' I asked, pulling her up gently.

'I…I'm in the bathroom? Oh, well, let me…let me gather my thoughts,' she mumbled massaging her forehead.

'I was talking to Black…' she began. 'We were walking down the corridor and we were talking about Christmas…and then I wanted to know the password to the Prefects bathroom and…he showed it to me and we both came in. After that I don't remember much. Is he…is he gone?'

'Vicky, Black did this to you?' I shrieked.

'Jane, I don't know what happened. We have to talk to him!' she said trying to stand up but she fell down dizzily.

'Relax a bit, will you? I will talk to him personally and I swear I will make him suffer if he's done this to you. Why would he…why would he try to drown you in that tub? That's just mad!'

'Maybe…maybe I fell in the tub and hit my head…' she countered.

'Vicky, stop defending him! We have to get to the bottom of this!'

We went to professor Slughorn first and told him everything. Unfortunately, this man was the parody of Walt Disney himself. When he heard what had happened, he started sweating and fidgeting like he had been the culprit.

'Oh, dear, oh, dear, but Mr. Black would never harm a student!' he squeaked.

'Oh, I know, Sir, shocking isn't it?' Lucille squeaked back. 'It's just not right!'

'But thank the heavens Miss Victoria is safe and sound. You did take her to the Infirmary, didn't you?'

'Of course we did. That's the least we could do. But right now we need to find Black and ask him a couple of questions,' I told him.

'Oh yes…of course. But please let us be gentle about it. Maybe there was some sort of misunderstanding…'

'Yes, because a young girl is found unconscious in a tub of water every day,' I replied annoyed.

'Cynicism is not an admirable trait, Miss Greystone,' Slughorn mumbled, getting red in the face. 'Before judging someone, you need to have evidence.'

'And we will find the evidence once we talk to Black,' I muttered.

'Yes, well, I suppose you are right in this case…'

When Black stepped in his office half an hour later, he looked like he had been interrupted from a nice afternoon nap. He was clearly surprised.

'What is this all about, Sir?'

'Perhaps you can explain, Mr. Black, why Miss Victoria is in the Infirmary at the moment?'

His eyes widened.

'Victoria? What happened to her? Is she alright?'

'Not quite. And we believe you might be the cause of that,' I said. 'Vicky was found unconscious in the Prefect's bathroom. Know anything about that?'

'I…I have no idea…' he said scratching his head. 'I mean, I remember we were walking down the corridor an hour ago and we were talking about Christmas and then…then…'

He suddenly grimaced. His whole face turned into deep wrinkles.

'Oh, I think I took her to the Prefect's Bathroom because she wanted to know the password. I think she tried to kiss me…but I wasn't quite in the mood for that and then we said goodbye and I came back to the common room.'

So, you're telling us nothing else happened in that bathroom? She just tried to kiss you, you refused her and then you took off? Just like that?' I asked.

'Well, yes, we both left the bathroom after that,' he said staring at me confused.

'Black, you shouldn't lie to us. Why would Vicky lie unconscious in a tub full of water?'

'Goodness! Unconscious? Nothing like that happened! She was very conscious when we were talking. I would have told you if something had happened. But there was nothing like that!'

By the looks of it, Black was telling the truth. The only thing that made me doubt him was a shadow of fear that constantly flickered on his face.

He seemed appalled by the idea. And the fear, the fear reflected his fear of having done such a thing. He was mortified at the possibility of having committed this act.

Black, was it him…was it him that made you do it? I thought, looking into his bright, watery brown eyes.

He flinched involuntarily when he met my eyes.

Did Riddle do this?

He held his arms as if he was cold. Two red spots appeared on his cheek bones.

You think Riddle did it.

I felt a great flow of hatred wash over me. My friend was badly hurt thanks to him. He had been behind it. Why hadn't this been my first thought? Why had I believed for a second that our conversation at Christmas had been real?

Then again, maybe Riddle was always honest, he was always real. I just never saw that all his words were poisonous knives reflecting a psychotic killer in the making.

He wasn't a troubled man. He was a stupid, spiteful little man that had unfortunately been given a wand.

If he were in front of me right now, I wouldn't hesitate to rip his head off.

Vicky insisted she didn't need to stay in the Infirmary the whole night. But I knew better than to unleash her on a dozen of curious and gossiping Slytherin brats. I also feared that Black and Riddle might still have a bone to pick with her. And what if she got sick or something?

I couldn't take that risk. Before I killed the both of them, I needed her to be safe.

'But this is just ridiculous,' she muttered, pouting. 'I need to get out of this bed. I have to face my fears. I need to talk to him, Jane. I can't believe he did it. He would never harm a hair on my head, I could vouch for that!'

'Yes, and you also said that Grindelwald just needed a good psychiatrist. Until we sort this mess out, you have to stay here. Rest a bit, will you? You will talk to Black later. Look, I don't believe he did it either, but he's a bit off limits right now, understand?'

'Do you think he'll get expelled for this?'

'I don't know, Vicky. He probably won't. Not until we decide what really happened. Headmaster Dippet will have the final word.'

'Oh, Jane, I know I sound crazy, but I'd hate it if he went away because of me.'

'Yes, you definitely sound crazy. Vicky, I'll take care of things. If he is innocent, there's no reason for him to go.'

'Jane,' she said taking my head. 'I almost died today.'

'Nonsense! You wouldn't have died!' I said, trying to sound nonchalant. It wasn't working.

'What if I had?'

'Don't say such things!'

'What if you hadn't found me?'

'Vicky, we would have found you. Even that stupid mermaid would have told someone at one point. Please, don't think of such things. You can't die on my watch.'

'I hope not…God, I am so afraid. I mean what if it's true? What if the boy I like tried to drown me?'

I hugged her tightly.

'Well, then, you sure know how to pick'em.'

She started laughing, but a small tear fell down her porcelain face.

'If…Merlin, if he really did it, even if he was…well, I mean, that means he's not alright. That means he's ill. If he really attempted that, it means he's not well. Either that or…'

'Or?'

'No, I can't think of that! He can't have that much control over him! He just can't!' she said, fidgeting with her blanket.

'It's Riddle, isn't it?' I said, clenching my fists.

'Jane, I don't believe it! I can't. That means Black is lost.'

'No, it doesn't. He is not lost. If Riddle really caused this, I promise you he won't get away with it.'

'But what will you do?'

I looked out the window at the falling night. It was a bleak scenery to me.

'I'm going to go to Prefect Rounds. For now.'

'Hello and welcome everyone to our first Prefect meeting.'

Fantastic. First time I wanted to hex off Riddle's head and we had a bloody Prefect meeting. I was so angry that my knuckles were white from gripping the arms of my chair.

From time to time, I glared at Riddle menacingly.

I usually don't show my anger because it's not a very smart move, but right now, seeing him sit there all smug and pleased with himself made me want to chop him into tiny bits and feed them to the dogs.

He stared back raising a brow.

I nodded as if to tell him 'you know, you little bastard.'

He furrowed his brows in confusion.

So he was going to play dumb.

The short and plump blonde in front of the seats demanded my attention. She was the Head Girl. I saw Dorcas slouched next to her, flipping through some papers, trying to seem detached and relaxed. Though he was constantly looking at his watch.

'First off, I'm happy to see we have some new faces this year. Welcome Fifth year prefects. I hope you'll have a great year with us. I also hope you won't let the team down. There is temptation of course, as a Prefect, to abuse your power. Some of you become irresponsible because the workload is too heavy, some seem to forget that we are their superiors, some simply can't handle team work. For all of those who think they're the next rebels, let me tell you that insubordination will not be accepted here. Any form of retaliation will be met with severe punishment. I will make sure your Fifth Year will be a year from hell.'

Just about every new Prefect looked at each other in fear and gulped down as they sank lower into their chairs.

'But,' the Head Girl began again, smiling, 'thankfully, up till now, no reports of such doings have come to my attention. So, you guys are off the hook. But we do have a more urgent problem to deal with. And that is the efficacy of Prefect Rounds. As we all know, Prefect Rounds demand focus and diligence. Dorcas and I know that some of you lack in that area. All of you slackers perhaps are still unaware of the fact that Grindelwald could have attacked our school and he still poses a treat to this us. Perhaps you're not conscious of the turbulent times we're going through. Well, I am. And I will make sure all of you come to your senses. I have a list here of the Prefect teams that did not manage to stand up to my expectations this year. I'm afraid Dorcas and I will have to join you at some of your Rounds to see how you are doing. Call it a surveillance exercise. Remember, Hogwarts isn't just a school, it's an institution. Starting tonight, you will be inspected.'

I could have almost slapped my forehead. Who was this puny creature that came up with this insipid measure?

Riddle and I were at the top of the list. And Dorcas was more than eager to agree to join us at Rounds tonight.

Was the universe against me? I just wanted to fight with Riddle. Was that too much to ask?

'Focus, lads and ladies, focus. What do you see? An empty corridor? No! Five statues. Five statues that could hide some mischievous students.'

Riddle and I were walking in silence, following a very zealous Dorcas. His voice was like a hammer into my brain. I tried droning it out, but every time I did that, the annoying boy turned around and asked for my opinion, looking at me gallantly.

'After all, some students are familiar with some dissimulation charms, isn't that right Jane?'

'Yes. I bet they use them just to get the mickey out of us. They have nothing better to do with their lives.'

'Hahahaha, you have a very dry sense of humour, Jane. But you have to take care for pranksters. There are some people in this school who think it's funny to levitate a bottle of ink above your head.'

'Just imagine…' I snorted impatiently.

'Here for example,' he said turning a corner, 'is a perfectly innocent looking broom cupboard. But if we open it…'

He pushed the door open. It was empty. A small rat ran out of it scared.

A moat of dust flew over our heads.

'Well, they were lucky. But I caught up to five people in this small cupboard once,' he said coughing from the dust.

I was starting to lose my patience, slowly, very slowly…

Suddenly we heard a sound down the corridor. It sounded like laughter.

'Aha, some new victims,' Dorcas said smirking and ran towards that spot.

My nerves getting the better of me, I opened the broom cupboard, pushed Riddle inside and shut the door.

We both lit our wands at the same time.

'I hope you're not going to play out one of your fantasies, Greystone,' he began.

'How dare you play dumb? How dare you just stand there nonchalantly? How dare you do that after what you've done? You shouldn't even have the nerve to look me in the eye. I knew you were a selfish coward, but I had no idea you went to these kinds of lengths. Though I probably shouldn't be surprised.'

'Before you start raving like mad, might I know what you're accusing me of?' he asked, frowning.

'I think you know better than I.'

'You will find that I don't.'

'Oh, don't start with that! We both know Victoria is in the hospital now because of you.'

A sudden flash of anger crossed his face before his eyes understood.

'Oh, Black. I should have suspected you would ask me about that. I know what he did.'

'What he did? Let's not play innocent here, we both know that you have him in the palm of your hand.'

'I do not think Black would appreciate this description. He's capable of acting on his own, you know. And he's capable of turning psychotic all by himself. He doesn't need my help for that. I was pretty surprised when I found out. It sure killed my appetite at dinner.'

'You made him do it. You can't stand here and deny it to my face. You made him do that to her. He would never hurt her if he weren't controlled by you.'

'I made him do it? You think I'd suddenly start killing young girls just for fun, using Black? No, I'd do that myself.'

'Then you deny using him? I saw you in him once, do you remember? It happened in a bathroom…'

He sighed and leant against a rack of what looked like empty jars.

'I admit it's a bit complicated…Alright, sometimes I take advantage of him, but nothing so serious. Nothing as stupid as this, anyway. If he submits to my control, he does it willingly.'

I opened my mouth in shock.

'Willingly? And you expect me to believe that?'

'You don't know anything about him,' Riddle said, his tone menacing. 'I wouldn't use him for killing. That is beneath him and beneath our friendship.'

'Oh, don't start calling your sick bond a friendship! I'm sure he wouldn't call you a friend!'

'So, you were right. After Christmas, you just started thinking the worst of me again. I mean, thinking bad about me is fine, but thinking the worst? Isn't that exaggerating?'

'Look here,' I said pushing him back a little with my wand, 'my best friend was hurt because of you and your sick friend. I want some answers. And if you don't give me any, Dumbledore and Headmaster Dippet will have a say in this.'

'You'll go to them whether I tell you something or not,' he said blankly.

'I am telling you only once. As much as I'd love to get the credit for this, I did not harm your friend. Is that clear?'

'It's still partly your responsibility if Black did. And I don't believe you,' I told him coldly.

'Oh, I've heard that line before. Though, I can't blame you, can I? I wouldn't believe myself either. Whatever happens, you have no evidence against me.'

'I really hate you, Riddle.'

'Sweet music to my ears,' he said smiling. 'But please, Greystone, say it like you mean it.'

'Most likely, you are not even worthy of hate,' I said.

'Oh, I am. I've worked hard for that. You know, I'm glad you're being so open tonight.'

The door suddenly flew open.

'Mr. Riddle, Jane! What is going on? Did he take you in there, Jane?' Dorcas asked, looking at us worriedly.

I groaned and pushed past him annoyed.

We continued our excruciating Round until we parted ways and I shared a deadly glare with Riddle.

Dorcas probably thought we were very immature. But I didn't care. If he was guilty, then he didn't deserve better.

The following day, the matter was taken to Headmaster Dippet. As usual, he was enveloped in his own thoughts and his own problems. He was already trying to hush up things with Victoria's parents.

'They want the guilty party to come out. They want severe punishment. Otherwise, Miss Victoria will leave our establishment.'

'That can't happen, Sir. We must sort this out, immediately,' I began.

'And I think we shall. In just a couple of moments. I have summoned Mr. Black to my office. And we will deal with this in a civilized manner.'

Black came in minutes later and he was made to sit on the chair in front of Dippet's desk.

Without any warning, dozens of leather straps appeared around Black's body. He was tied to the chair.

Dippet walked towards him, holding a vial that contained some black liquid.

He opened his mouth forcefully and emptied it down his throat.

The girls and I watched in horror.

'Sir, but…isn't that Veritas? That is not allowed at Hogwarts!'

'Nonsense, Miss Greystone, it's been used since the beginning of time. We'd get nowhere in the world without it. Besides, Hogwarts, A History is a very stupid book.'

I was about to protest, but Black was already moving in a very strange way. He opened his mouth, then closed it. His hands shook like mad. His entire body was twisting in the chair.

His eyes looked empty of all life.

'Mr. Black, did you attempt to harm Miss Victoria?'

I saw him squirm in his chair for some moments before answering.

'Yes.'

My heart stopped. No, it couldn't be.

'Did you take her to the Prefect Bathroom?'

'Yes.'

'Did you try to drown her in the tub?'

'Yes.'

'How did you do it?'

'I threw her in the tub and started choking her.'

Angry, hot tears were swelling at the corner of my eyes. I couldn't believe it! I couldn't listen.

'Why did you do it?'

'She kissed me. I went mad. Something went mad inside of me. Something I don't understand. But her taste made me go mad...'

I stepped towards him and looked into his eyes.

'Were you compelled to harm her?'

'No.'

'Are you certain about that?'

'Yes.'

'What about Riddle?'

'Miss Greystone, what do you think you're doing?' Headmaster Dippet asked, looking at me scandalized.

'Tom didn't know, he…didn't know,' Black managed to say looking down.

My shoulders sagged to the ground. I brushed away the tears that were threatening to fall.

'Mr. Black, are you feeling alright?' Dippet asked.

'No.'

'Do you think you are a danger for this school?'

'No. But others do. Sometimes, sometimes, I just lose my conscience, but it comes back...'

'Did you want to harm Miss Victoria?'

'Yes. No.' He struggled for a while longer. 'Both.'

'Do you want us to help you?'

'Yes. Yes, I do…'

The Headmaster's decision was announced in the entire common room. Professor Slughorn made sure everyone knew.

'…and I'm afraid your beloved friend will have to be excused for a while. He will not be attending Hogwarts, for an unknown period of time. But he will be under treatment at Saint Mungo. And we hope the best for him. He is a well-intentioned boy and he has a good heart. He will be healed.'

Slughorn seemed very confident that he would make a recovery but the rest of the Slytherins were very skeptical. All of them were very confused and curious. Riddle's minions looked displeased and annoyed beyond anything else and they threw Vicky some nasty glares as if it was her fault.

She, on the other hand, ran to her bed and started crying. I tried comforting her, but she told me to leave. Now she was blaming me for making him leave.

'He should have stayed! He would get much better help here! I knew it wasn't really him who had done this.'

Even if her face was red and she was wailing, she still managed to look poise and dignified. I admired her strength.

'Do you know what happen to the mentally ill at Saint Mungo? They never leave that place, that's what happens. None of them make a recovery. Because that place just makes them go madder.'

'Victoria, there was no other solution, he was putting other people's lives in...'

'Don't say it, Jane. Just please shut up. I know he will never get out of that place.'

'I can't believe that! I'm sure that if he receives the proper care he will recover.'

'That place won't let him!'

'What have you got against Saint Mungo?'

She looked at me with pain and anguish.

'You have no idea...absolutely no idea,' she said feebly.

'Then tell me, please!'

'Just go away, Jane. I don't want to see you right now.'

'But...'

'Just go!'

I walked downstairs feeling like the last person on Earth.

I needed some peace. I needed silence. I needed to know things would be okay.

I walked into the library feeling dizzy. Everything was spinning around me.

I was amazed to find the Restricted Section open. I stepped inside and quickly sat down at a table, as another wave of nausea hit me. Why had everything gone so wrong? Why couldn't I fix it? I wanted to cry on somebody's shoulder.

But the fact remained. Black was unstable. Vicky was hurt. And Riddle had nothing to do with it. Just like that. He had got away again.

He was always above everything. But everything seemed to happen because of him. Black was mad, his minions were mad, everyone was mad around him.

He had probably helped Black down this path.

Suddenly, I knew why this place was open. He had the key.

He was in the back, arranging a shelf of books.

'What are you doing here?'

'Doing my job,' he answered coldly, not looking my way.

'Black was taken away.'

'I heard.'

'It's much better this way. He is not well. Saint Mungo will help him…'

'Saint Mungo will not help him. He should have stayed.'

'Well, I'm sorry but staying with you wasn't helping him either, as I recall,' I began. I always felt like picking an argument with him.

'Don't you have anything better to do right now?' he replied acidly.

'Fine, I just…I don't even know why I came here.'

I turned around, but in my stupidity I tripped over some books and fell to the floor.

And suddenly the nausea disappeared.

A cool feeling of beauty pervaded my senses. All I could see was blue. The shimmering river was sparkling in front of my eyes.

As I hit the ground I didn't care about the small pain because I felt free.

When I opened my eyes again I saw Riddle towering over me.

No, I hadn't entered his mind.

But ever since I saw that river, I can't get it out of my head. It is following me everywhere. I could easily reach it.

No, I couldn't.

Even if I could cast Legilimens on him, the flames would always be up.

He extended his hand. I looked at him confused. He was helping me get up?

After everything that had happened?

I took his hand and he pulled me up, into his arms.

'I don't feel well at all,' I told him, half-heartedly.

'You just fell.'

'No...it's you. It's always you.'

He opened his mouth to reply, but the warmth was too much to bear.

The river was close.

I pulled him into a kiss. Only God knows why.

I crushed my lips over his and whispered 'Legilimens' in my head.

The dark depths of my mind opened as did his. He was suddenly holding my waist. My head had hit a shelf and the pain was numbing me.

Our tongues met and my hands found his neck. I pulled his collar roughly, trying to crush his neck.

And then, the precipice opened for me.

And there were no flames around it. I smiled with joy. I probably smiled into the kiss. It grew stronger. I felt our bones collide. But I was stronger.

I jumped into the shimmering river.

Darkness engulfed me.

Next time, we enter Riddle's mind. And some interesting discoveries...

P.S. This is not The Kiss. The Kiss has to be mutual. It also has to be devoid of any interests. It will be only based on feelings. This is not to say this kiss doesn't mean something. Just not that something.

Thanks for reading :) (Now wasn't that long?)