A/N: Hello loves! Before I get any more hate mail, I just want to make one thing clear: Yes, Isabella and Jacob are going to have sex. Not every scene, but enough that their relationship will be very present in the upcoming chapters. Sorry if this offends you. Honestly, in an M-rated story where Bella is involved with both male protagonists, I don't know how some of you didn't see this coming. That being said, warnings for brief sexual content. Anyway, the topic of conversation gets kind of weird in this chapter, but I promise it's important in the future. Hope the majority of you can enjoy! XOXOX
The Laws of Nature
The lovers woke in the morning far later than the rest of the pack. There would be no mistaking what had happened, especially not when they were the only two who had yet to show their face. However, neither one cared, and instead they spent the morning hours in comfortable silence, basking in the sunlight and each other's presence.
Isabella felt a strange sense of completeness. She knew she should feel terrible. She had betrayed her wedding vows and lied with another man, the enemy her her husband at that, but she could not bring herself to be troubled. Instead, she felt calm, at peace. And she felt Jacob's touch as he traced feather-light patterns up and down her spine. His chest was pressed up against her, the steady thrum of his heart beating through her back so that her heart and breaths fell in time. It was an unfamiliar yet welcome feeling to be held in such a manner, to be encompassed by Jacob's warmth, strong muscles protecting her though she knew the only thing they had to fear was the judgement of the pack. But that was another worry entirely; nothing to ruin this moment over.
"What shall I make of this vision?" he pondered, eyes still lazy and content from a good night's sleep as they scanned lazily up and down her bare frame. Though she could not see him as her back was turned, she could feel his gaze boring holes through her skin.
"Make of it as you like," Isabella answered, just as content.
There was a pleasant ache in her bones, a stiffness that she was in no hurry to reprieve. Her entire body was aglow with a new kind of energy, the kind that made her feel invincible. Was this was immortality felt like? This burning, raw kind of power that amplified every second? Because lying next to Jacob, she could feel every inch of his skin against hers, each point of contact alive and overwhelming her senses. It drove her mad in the best way.
Jacob rolled her over so that they were nose to nose, close enough so that she could feel his breath puff against her cheek, so that he could capture her lips in a sweet, hesitant kiss that held none of the urgency of the previous night, but all the desire and more. He took Isabella's breath away, and when he pulled back, she felt herself chase him, not willing to let go just yet.
He only chuckled.
"What should I do with this?"
The whistle had fallen off again during some point in the night. It was proving itself difficult to keep track of, though it looked rather at home in the palm of Jacob's hand rather than large and unwieldy in her own.
"Hold on to it for me?" Isabella asked, peering up into those deep dark eyes. "You seem to be far less forgetful than I. It is safer in your hands."
Jacob nodded, taking the whistle from her. He covered her hands with his own, lowering lips to place feather-light kisses along ridges of her fingers. They tickled, and she could not withhold the giggle that escaped her mouth. Oh, how childlike she felt! How absolutely giddy! Try as she may to keep a sober mood, she could not stave off this intense happiness that warmed her from the inside out.
"What does this mean...for us...?" Isabella wondered aloud, unable to meet Jacob's intense gaze.
Isabella dared not think she could make herself so important to someone as timeless as a god. How many mortals had he seen, watched wither away and die, their short life spans so insignificant for someone whose life spanned infinite eras. She was a speck, a blip on his never-ending timeline, nothing more. While Jacob...well she was not sure what Jacob was to her, though he was becoming more and more essential by the day.
"My heart seeks what it knows it cannot have," Jacob sighed, breath ghosting across her cheek. "You belong to someone else, and yet..."
"I belong to no one," Isabella rebuked, her eyes burning with something fierce. "Not anymore. Never again."
"Forgive me..."
His apology was swallowed by the crash of her lips on his, soft and insistent.
She welcomed Jacob back into the cradle of her hips and he slid inside her with a low moan, both of them enjoying the way they fit together so perfectly. This bout of love making was different than the night before. While last night was a whirlwind of unspoken thoughts and feelings, this was slowly and hazy, unrushed in its race towards ecstasy. Jacob took his time learning every inch of skin on her body, fingers and lips tracing every freckle, every curve and every scar, mapping her as if she were some uncharted land that he dedicated to put to memory.
His hips accelerated, stuttering as they both neared their release. It was just as exhilarating the second time as it was the first. Perhaps she was becoming addicted to this man. That had to be the only explanation for such desire, for a need that lingered long after the satisfaction of coupling.
Lying there in the afterglow of ecstasy, Isabella wondered what game her treacherous heart was playing.
Like any good thing, the morning had to come to an end.
They could not hide away in Isabella's hut forever. Jacob had pack business to attend to, and Isabella needed to check in on Emily as well as help her with any lingering chores. Reluctantly, they parted ways, promising to see each other in the evening when all work was over.
After changing into plain brown day robes, Isabella found Emily up the hill and a ways into the woods where the trees hung low enough so that ample branches broke off for kindling. There was a basket of her pickings laid a few feet from where she hunched over a mound of fallen wood. Though she had already gathered a substantial amount, it would take much more to stoke the bonfire at night. Isabella had come to find that out of all the tasks, this one was most daunting.
"How are things with Sam?" Isabella asked as she approached, putting herself to work as soon as she spied a stash of her own.
"Better," Emily smiled much more genuinely than she had the night before, much more at ease. "He apologized as soon as I arrived. Got down on hands and knees and begged my forgiveness for what he said. Do not tell him I told you, or he would deny it."
"The woman who can tame the alpha is a woman to be feared indeed," Isabella teased.
"And you?" Emily countered, seeing straight through Isabella's veneer of false normality. "What has you so giddy this day? Surely, it is not the twigs."
To emphasize her point, she tossed more branches into the basket where they rustled against their brothers and sisters.
Isabella flushed at the thought of telling Emily what had transpired. Though, she should have expected someone as observant as she to notice the change. It was foolish to think she could trick Emily.
"It's Jacob," Isabella said, unable to form more words without getting flustered.
"Oh?" Emily asked, arching an eyebrow. She stood upright now, giving Isabella her whole attention. "What of him?"
"He and I...we..."
Isabella was unable to continue, wringing her hand like some shy child. She was a woman now! This should be easier to talk about! Then why was it hard to speak without getting tongue-tied or having her throat close up? Her emotions were wild, uncontrollable, and she hated it. Thankfully, Emily was wise enough to glean her meaning.
"Truly?" she asked, eyes wide with surprise.
Isabella only managed to nod.
"Well, then I must offer my most heartfelt congratulations to you both," Emily said warmly, reaching over to embrace Isabella which she heartily returned. "It has been quite some time since I have seen Jacob happy, and I am glad to know you return his sentiments."
"It is more than just sentiments. When he isn't here, I crave him. I want him beside me, around me, inside me. I took him inside and it were as if he completed me. Without him, I feel empty. I want all of him always," Isabella confessed, her emotions sending her through a whirlwind. "Am I mad? Tell me, Emily, is this what insanity feels like? Because if it is then I never want to be sane again."
"You are not mad, Isabella," Emily smiled knowingly. "No, I know your affliction quite well. You are falling in love."
"Is love nothing but carnal desire?"
"At first," Emily replied. "Then it evolves. It becomes more passionate as you learn one another, draws you closer until you cannot imagine a life before they were in it. Soon, it is not about the lovemaking at all but the act of becoming one, the merging of your kindred souls."
"How is it - with Sam I mean?"
"He is...gentle," Emily said, unable to keep herself from smiling. "He puts on a brave front for his brothers, but in our tent he touches me as if I were made of glass, something precious, something to be worshipped. He cares only for my pleasure and thinks little of his own. And when we come together...I swear by the gods I see stars."
"You make it sound so...magical," Isabella sighed, wishing she was as eloquent with words. How had Emily managed to so perfectly capture the feeling Isabella had been trying all morning to describe?
"And with Jacob?" Emily prompted, curious but not overtly so.
"He is...cautious. But also generous? It is hard to explain," Isabella tried to find the words to properly describe being with Jacob. "I can feel his desire for me, and he showed it in such incredible ways, but there were times when it felt as though he did not know what to do with me."
"I suppose that is to be expected," Emily sympathized. "Mortals are hard to come by in these parts, and bedding a woman would not be worth the amount of energy it would take to travel to your side of the river."
"Given that knowledge, he was surprisingly skilled," Isabella said, correcting her interpretation of the evening with this new information on her freshly-minted lover. "Perhaps gods are just naturally more inclined in the art of seduction."
"The boys have their ways," Emily shrugged, confounding Isabella who stared at her intently, expecting an answer. "They take care of each other's needs, as brothers do. Sam encourages the pack to engage in such behavior to keep up their stamina and quell any building frustration."
"So you mean to say Jacob knows what he is doing, not because he has lied with women but because he has lied with...other...men?"
"Why do you sound so hesitant? Such relations are as natural as man and woman," Emily insisted, at first irritated at Isabella's narrow-mindedness until realization dawned on her. "Ah, yes, forgive me. I forget how conservative the village was. So foolish, trying to box the gods into certain roles, never once thinking that there were things in their divine nature far out of the limited understanding of mortals. Though, to be fair, it wasn't until I helped birth a few godlings that I was more open to possibilities."
"Godlings? You mean to say children spawn from these trysts?"
"Dear girl, how else do you think new gods are born? Not everyone goes around offering divine power to mortals."
"I always assumed through natural birth," Isabella said, while in all honesty she never gave it much thought. Obviously, Isabella knew about the mechanisms of sex, but the Elders had never told her much about the process of child-making or childbirth. There was no information on whether it was the same or vastly different from the mortal way. Pregnancy was something Isabella thought would just...happen. Or perhaps she would wake up one day with a baby in her arms. Now, talking to Emily, she realized how childish that all sounded. "Though I suppose if that were true, the River God would have more offspring...or any at all."
Emily's expression clouded and the mood sobered. Isabella was shocked how quickly Emily went back to picking up sticks, as if she had forgotten her reason to be happy.
"Children between mortals and gods are unnatural creatures. They are not meant for this world," she said curtly.
"How do you know?"
There was more angry stick sounds as Emily threw them onto the pile. It was evident Isabella had hit some kind of sore spot, though she could not imagine why or how the conversation had turned to something so serious.
"When I first arrived in this land, I too dreamed of a life by my husband's side. I dreamed of children filling his vast palace, of music and laughter, and we would be happy. Imagine my surprise when I arrived to find that he already had a child."
"What?" Isabella gasped.
A child? He had a child! All her time in the palace and there was no sign of any children ever taking residence within those stone cold walls.
"While he shielded the truth from you, our husband was frank with me. He told me that his previous wives had all passed and that the babe was the last remnant of the woman he had so freshly lost in childbirth. But the child was dying too. It did not look right, so small and pale with shriveled arms and legs. I was terrified. The River God had given up on it - never visited nor held his son - but I tried to save the poor creature. Nothing would work. I had no milk to lend from my breast and it refused all manner of foods. It never slept, never rested. Three weeks later the crying stopped, and we knew what it meant."
Emily had to stop for her own sake and collect herself, and a tense silence passed between them.
"When his son passed, the River God did not even shed a tear. He instructed the aura to get rid of it and just...moved on. I did not understand," Emily shuddered, a chill running down her spine as she finished her tale. And tears, they pricked her eyes at memories that still stung even after all these years. "He was so cruel afterwards, as if he could only see my failure to keep his child alive."
Isabella did not know how to feel or how to react to such a story. It shattered so many things she had come to believe about her husband and her fellow wives. However, one thing stuck out alarmingly.
"They had all died?" Isabella asked, searching for clarification which she unfortunately found in Emily's nod. "How? Did they all run away as you said or-or was it something else?"
"I am not sure. The one before me died from the complications of childbirth but I cannot think she was the only one. As for the others who did not run...I do not know. I only know that that palace is no place for a mortal woman nor their children."
Unknowingly, Isabella's hand flew to her stomach. She had never been so grateful to not have fallen pregnant during her husband's first and only attempt to bed her. She had never been so grateful to stand her ground. To carry a child to term only to die...and then have it follow in death...seemed like a horrible waste of a beautiful life.
"So...has Jacob...ever...you know...?"
"Sired children?" Emily finished, seeming to enjoy teasing Isabella with the ways this conversation unnerved her. "Yes, twice actually."
Isabella was dumbstruck. She was not expecting a yes, the word ringing through her ears but not traveling to her brain, as if she could not reconcile it.
"I can't imagine him looking so...wide."
Emily laughed, nearly doubling over, though Isabella did not know what she had said that was so amusing.
"Gods are not born the same way as mortals," Emily explained, wiping the sweat from her brow as she went and gathered up more sticks. "Mortals are pushed from their mothers into the world as tiny screaming masses that require years to mature. When a Shapeshifter is born, normally he spawns from the ground in which both parental seeds mix - sometimes fully grown, other times in various stages of development. Conception does not happen every time, not even most of the time, and there is no telling what set of circumstances will lend the forest to donate its magic to instill new life. Normally, it is in the case of a death or a shift in the balance of power."
"If they are born from the ground, then why say you helped birth them?"
"Had you ever seen a Shapeshifter birth, you would not ask that question," Emily laughed, and Isabella could tell from the seriousness that backed her playful tone that the birth a much more gruesome, violent affair than she was aware of.
"What about Leah? Can she have children through her own body?"
"Leah is barren. She will never have children," Emily replied, the first semblance of sympathy for the woman she claimed to hate slipping through. "The blood that courses through the veins of a god, the golden ichor, is meant to be the strongest, purest substance in existence. It increases strength, longevity, and virility. For men, this means an increase in stamina and other physical advantages. For women, this means no weakness, no tender times when your body betrays you. Ichor is not meant to be spilt or wasted on something as fickle as the promise of a child."
"What about you?"
"I may not have ichor, but I am still immortal. Many of the same rules apply," Emily said, her eyes deeply pained, as if this were a hard accepted truth. "I have not bled in nearly two hundred years. Even if I were still able, I do not think my body would be a hospitable environment for a child."
She seemed so despondent to this truth, as if her unborn children were something that she was still grieving. It pained Isabella to see her this way. Emily would have made such a wonderful mother, and the cruelty of immortality had robbed her of the chance.
"Do not worry for me, Isabella," Emily insisted, grasping her hand with a gentle squeeze. "Focus on yourself. You are still young. Your body is fit and in its prime for bearing children."
"You just told me that any child I sire with a god will be doomed to die," Isabella reminded, feeling uneasy about the notion of having children now that she knew the risks of incompatibility.
"I only know that of children sired by the River God. No mortal has ever sired a child with a Shapeshifter before. Sam turned me before we had the chance." "For all I know, you and Jacob could have a dozen godlings and live your lives happily in the forest until the end of days."
Momentarily, Isabella allowed her mind to wander. She saw a green glen filled with blooms on a bright summer day. There were little feet tripping over themselves on the soft grass, giggling as they ran from a man with long dark hair and dark eyes. Isabella saw herself sitting a ways away, cradling another little bundle to her chest as she watched the scene longingly. In this vision, her heart was full of all the things she had almost let go of. In this vision, everything was perfect.
"That is a lovely fantasy," she sighed, and Emily squeezed her hands in comfort.
"You are in the land of the gods, my dear. Fantasy is just another word for reality."