A/N: Hello! And thank you! This chapter was actually not easy to write; but I had been preparing myself for it, so here it is! I hope you enjoy.
Chapter 14
Long Long Way (Damien Rice)
The sunrise was worthy of the word breathtaking. Warm flares of light seeped through Emma's window; bathing her skin with an amazing glow. Regina had fled with a heavy heart and the blonde was only seconds away from noticing her absence. She shifted in her bed and once her arm did not collide with the now familiar body, her green eyes fluttered open.
At first the blonde's mind settled in the idea that she must be in the shower or perhaps having coffee with her grandmother; however once she noticed her luggage was gone that's when it hit her. Regina was gone.
Emma sat up and saw the envelope full of money on her nightstand, her heart sank. In her mind this could mean two things… either this was Regina's way of breaking ties for good or it simply meant that what had happened between them was as real for her as it was for Emma.
The woman couldn't find the will to be mad at Regina… she didn't understand why she had just left with no word; however what she had lived with and seen in the woman was as real as it gets. The only thing she felt at the moment was her heart breaking.
Regina had already been in Seattle for hours; after arriving she had gone home for a long hot shower and some space to ground herself. After putting on an impeccable outfit; the brunette left to meet with her father.
She was now making her way into the tall skyscraper. Every regal step she took was worthy of a monarch; most people she passed by once inside the building of course knew her. About twenty floors after, Regina walked towards her father's office with determination.
His faithful secretary stood from her fancy desk as she noticed the brunette had no intentions of stopping.
"Good morning Miss Tchaikovsky"
Regina sneered at the woman and continued to walk; she hated the bitch and she knew that the feeling was completely mutual.
"Ma'am you can't go in like that, I have to announce you" She rushed and tried to catch up with the other woman.
Regina waved her hand dismissively and let herself into the stunning large office surrounded by glass. The view of the city was simply amazing yet the brunette only wanted to see her resolve through. The man sporting an expensive suit looked up from his paper work and noticed his daughter approaching him with fire in her eyes.
He turned his attention back down to his papers "Good morning Реги́нa"
Regina didn't even bother with sitting down; she went directly to the point "So you have people following me now?"
The man looked up expressionless "What are you talking about?"
"You know exactly what I am talking about"
Her father put down the luxurious silver pen and leaned back in his leather chair "I have no need or interest to follow you"
"Then how the hell do you know of my whereabouts? My life is none of your business"
"When you use my name to free yourself from jail time and an array of consequences you become my business"
Regina clenched her jaw and swallowed as she took a small breath in, she had actually called her grandfather to help her and Emma out of Jail… they had a very close relationship and she knew he would never tell her father about it.
"And no… Your grandfather didn't cross you if that is what you're thinking"
"Then who?"
"That is not important"
Regina was growing more and more frustrated "Then. What do you… want?"
The man furrowed his brows curiously "Why are you in such distress?"
"Stop it with the bullshit! You want something what is it?"
The man said nothing and stood from his chair; a few steps away he came to a wooden surface where a glass bottle and glasses rested. He began to pour himself a drink.
"Scotch?" The man turned to his daughter and politely asked.
"You and I… we don't just meet for drinks and catch up on our lives' current events, and let's be honest it's not like you care enough to scold your little girl for getting in trouble with the police"
"You have so much potential Regina… great potential" He took the glass in his hand and put a hand in his pocket "All of this… could be yours, you were trained for it"
"Well I don't want it"
He smiled and raised both brows "You always did have a problem…"
"What Father?" The last word came out of her lips with such disdain, it felt like a mock "I didn't become enough of a bitch to overtake your throne and follow your footsteps? Because I actually think you did a fantastic job, I grew up to become another one of your casualties, surrounded by a massive fortress and incapable of true human connection"
"On the contrary Regina, love is weakness… and you always had that flaw, for a moment there I thought you had overcome the obstacle… reason why I called you here today, Well… I see I was wrong"
Regina smiled darkly as she shook her head "I knew you were bluffing! I swear if you touch her… I will kill you myself" The woman threatened as she pointed a condemning finger at the man "And we both know I am more than capable of doing so"
Her father placed the glass on the classy desk and walked closer to the brunette. Once they were face to face he spoke again "You think I want to hurt your little blonde friend?"
"I don't know you tell me" She challenged.
The man took a deep breath as his brows knitted together "Why would I want to do that Реги́нa?" The man grinned and looked into her eyes "That's what you do… after all you are my girl"
Regina's eyes reddened and shone with unshed tears. She clenched her fists and jaw. The man walked over to his side of the desk and placed his hands on it as he sat.
"We destroy everything we touch…" He said looking into her eyes with no regret.
By now Regina's lip was twitching lightly.
"Just look at your mother… Dear" He finished with a pitiful smile.
And with those words he gave the last blow; a single tear broke and fell down Regina's cheek.
The man knew exactly how to manipulate the brunette; he had mastered the art over the years. She had never been able to win a face off with her father… and it seemed today would be no different. He had planted yet another toxic seed.
After the blonde dragged herself to the bathroom and took a long shower herself, she made her way down the stairs said her goodbyes. The trip back to Seattle was an absolute blur, practically everything she owned still smelled like Regina; and even though she had considered it more than a couple times as she stared at her cell phone, she did not text or tried to call the brunette.
She needed to pick up Jackal from Ruby's place and head back to her apartment. The blonde was quickly finding tasks to fill her day with; getting Regina off her mind would be difficult but not impossible… or so she thought.
Once her brunette friend saw her; she figured what had happened… Ruby opened the door of her apartment no words needed. Emma walked in and was welcomed by her beloved dog. The blonde smiled and kneeled down while she petted and gave him a couple hundred kisses.
Ruby closed the door and then walked to her kitchen; she opened the refrigerator and retrieved a couple of beers, handing one over to the blonde.
"Ok… what the hell happened and why do you look like someone just killed your dog?"
Jackal barked at the brunette; Emma turned to the golden retriever and let out a small smile.
Ruby did the same "Cat… I meant to say cat"
Emma took a deep breath and shook her head "Where do I even start?"
"Ok… let's recap here… I take it you guys totally acted on that hella crazy chemistry thing you had going on?"
The blonde closed her eyes and kicked herself a thousand times in her mind.
"Alright… nuff said" Ruby added and took a sip of her drink.
"We more than acted on it… I love her"
Blue eyes nearly jumped out of the brunette's face "You what?!"
"Exactly what you just heard"
"Heavy… well does she love you back?"
The blonde looked up unsure of what to say
"Oh no… Emma"
"She does… I think, I mean maybe… Ugh" The blonde crossed her arms on the counter and dropped her head on them "I don't know…" She said with a now muffled voice.
After a few seconds she lifted her head back up and stared at empty space "You can't fake what I saw in her eyes…"
Ruby took a deep breath and placed a hand over her friend's "I think you are both fucked Em"
Emma let out a lazy laugh.
"I mean it doesn't take a genius… the woman was dead jealous of me after only a few days of meeting you; you basically lived in denial for weeks, dropped an insane amount of money just to spend a few days with her… There's no doubt about it, you both have lost your fucking minds"
"She left…"
"What do you mean she left?"
"We spent the night together and when I woke up she was gone… money on my nightstand, no note… nothing"
"Oh my God you fucked her!"
Emma furrowed her brows "Ruby… I didn't just fuck her… It was more than that"
"Well clearly it was you look like a thousand shits… I just can't say the M word" The brunette shuddered. "I knew this woman was going to rock your world… Well, why don't you just call her and just ask her? I mean be up front"
"Ruby she walked out on me… I think it's obvious she doesn't want to be bothered"
"Emma what are you seven? and in freaking elementary school?"
"I can just take a hint Rubes… She would have left a note or something; this is all my stupid fault… she told me she didn't do feelings or commitments, she was clear about it"
"Emma call her… put yourself out of the fucking misery, unless you want to mope around for ages… just to find out she maybe does want you back"
The brunette placed a hand on her friend's arm and gave her an honest look of support "You might regret it if you don't"
The blonde shook her head and swallowed the desire to cry as she rolled her eyes "I can't"
Ruby accepted her friend's answer and did what she would always do regardless… be there for here unconditionally.
A couple of days had passed and everything had regained its normalcy. Regina had returned to her busy schedules and Emma back to her airplanes. Things seemed to be normal yet over both their heads hovered a tiny gray cloud.
Regina found herself in unbearable moods more often than normal and it was becoming far too exhausting to even be inside her own skin. Getting Emma Swan out of her head had proved to be the hardest thing she had ever been faced with. Her father had played her fantastically; it was now obvious he had no interest in harming the blonde to get to Regina; he was a master at it using a handful of words and mind games. Sadly the man had turned his daughter against herself in a matter of seconds, and she was now trying to stay as far away from Emma as she could, truly believing she could bring nothing good into the blonde's life. Nothing but expected heartache and that was the last thing the younger woman deserved. Regina had made sure to rip the band aid off quickly; hopefully Emma was now hating her and on her way to healing the damage Regina knew she had done.
Emma on the other hand was far from despising Regina… The blonde had gone back to her lonely and secluded life; overloading herself with the intensity of her emotions, not a word about it to be shared, simply accepting things as they were… the only difference was that now she was walking around with a huge love inside and what seemed to feel like an eternal belly ache.
Back at her apartment; the blonde laid on her comfortable couch with her beloved and massive golden retriever resting on her legs. As pitiful as it seemed Emma had somehow found her way into her photo gallery and was now staring at the only thing she had left to remind her that what she and Regina had was real and had actually happened.
Ruby walked in with a bag of take out food and closed the door behind her. The brunette noticed what Emma was doing and placed the packed food on the counter.
"Ok… we have to get you out of here I'm serious"
Emma rolled her eyes and placed her phone on her chest "I told you… I don't feel like going out"
Ruby walked over to the couch and sat on the small edge next to Emma's feet "Emma you are wallowing"
"I'm not Rubes… I told you I'm fine"
"No you are not…"
Emma shifted and Jackal jumped off the couch in search of some fresh water.
The blonde sat facing her friend "I am fine"
"You need to seriously stop saying that and fucking break something"
"What?"
"Yes! You are not allowing yourself to feel what you really feel"
Emma furrowed her brows "You make absolutely no sense"
Moments like this were few far in between with Ruby yet the brunette adored Emma and the blonde was basically the only one who got to see her softer side "I know… that deep down that big amazing heart you have Emma, there has to be at least a drop on anger"
The blonde simply looked into her friend's blue honest eyes.
"Being angry at her doesn't mean you hate her… but what she did to you was absolute shit and you need to allow yourself to express it"
Emma's phone vibrated in her hands; she looked down and noticed her grandma Lily was calling her however the blonde was feeling far from coherent and did not want to worry her, she allowed the phone to continue to vibrate until it went to voicemail.
Emma looked up at the brunette.
"Actually… I think you are right, we should go out" The blonde completely changed the subject on her friend and stood
Emma made her way to her bedroom "Come on! Let's get ready… and call Neal" She said from within the room.
Ruby took a deep breath and laid back on the couch worried about her friend.
Regardless whatever crazy state of denial and inner avoidance Emma was currently in; Ruby was always there and ready to be the friend she needed; the bond they shared was thicker than blood and whatever the blonde wanted to do they would do… be it cry herself to sleep or party all night.
After a couple of hours they were already on their way to one of their favorite bars. Ruby drove through the beautiful and lively streets of downtown Seattle as the night fell.
Regina found comfort in watching the sun sink into the deep waters that overlooked her terrace. The brunette remembered Emma's words that day on the bridge… she smiled softly at the memory and watched something bigger than herself. She was easily reminded that nothing had a beginning or an end; as she played with the necklace on her neck, stunning dark eyes got lost in the soft movement of life happening around her.
Back at the lively place; Ruby and Emma met up with Neal. The handsome man welcomed the blonde back with a warm hug.
"Welcome back and you are right on time" The man said with one of his signature charming smiles "This asshole over here was kicking my ass and cleaning my pockets" Neal pointed at his friend who was also smiling and holding a pool cue.
He placed his arm around the blonde "She is Seattle's own black widow my friend… so get ready to detach from my 300 bucks"
Emma pushed a smile and agreed to a round of pool. Ruby went to the bar and ordered a round of beers for her friends. After washing down the first bottle and easily winning back Neal's 300 dollars, Emma felt her cellphone vibrate in her back pocket. She pulled it out and realized she had a couple missed calls from her mother.
She instantly grew curious and began to dial back; in the haze of the music playing in the background and her friend's laughter, Neal dropped the cue and caught the blonde from falling; her knees almost failed her as her ears began to beep her mind into another state.
"Emma! Are you ok?"
Voices echoed faintly as she dropped her phone and an already worried Ruby reacted and caught it.
The brunette resumed the call Emma could not finish and as the voice on the other end spoke her face fell. Ruby looked at an expecting Neal.
Life has a strange way of shaking the fuck out of you and suddenly remind you that you are a small as a grain of sand; even though you feel vast and immense inside, full of these insanely amazing things called feelings, those things could sometimes be and feel so complex that nothing in existence no matter how stunning or how ugly could convey meaning to them. Life was in full motion… and we were all in it, black or white, right or wrong, and every stunning shade of color in the middle.
Things happened quickly; Ruby drove Emma back to her apartment after convincing Neal they would be fine. Emma was out of her shock and now seemed to be running on pure adrenaline; the blonde frantically ran into her bedroom and began to pack a small bag, Ruby followed and tried her very best to make her stop for at least one second.
"Emma…" The blue eyed woman searched for green eyes however they were focused in the rush of walking around her room collecting everything she needed and could fit in a small bag.
"Emma please stop for a second and look at me" Ruby placed a hand on the blonde's arm.
"I can't" The blonde shook her friend off and continued.
"Emma you can't ride like this! Please wait until tomorrow, I'll get out of my shift and take you"
"I don't need you to come with me I'll be fine, I don't want you or Neal following me… I want to be alone… got it?"
"Emma I'm serious! You're in shock; please just listen to me this once"
The blonde stopped and looked into the brunette's eyes "I told you I'm fine and I want to be left alone now please…" Emma buried her hands in her blonde hair and looked around, a few seconds later she walked into the bathroom.
Ruby walked out to Emma's living room and took the blonde's cellphone from the counter. The brunette went through the contacts and a few seconds later she was typing with speed.
'Emma's grandmother died and she is about to ride her motorcycle all the way to fucking Vancouver. I know she won't listen to reason because she is too fucking stubborn but if you really care about her, you won't let her go through this alone. I will be there tomorrow as soon as I can. Ruby'
The woman hit send and placed the device back on the counter.
Emma walked out of her bedroom, passed Ruby and then out of her apartment.
"Fuck!" The frustrated brunette growled.
Emma raw away in the cold night and rode; she rode her motorcycle with high speed; not caring about anything or anyone, she had just lost the only mother she had ever know, she had lost a partner in crime and best friend… she had lost her hero and now everything looked black. After she could truly count herself alone. The further south she headed the heavier the cold became, the air was a numbing shade of cool dry which could only mean one thing. Snow was well on its way…
Life had just finished breaking Emma's heart into pieces; as snow began to fall she was feeling so alone and stuck, everything painted in the deep dark sky, the pain she felt… the raw movement of the reality beneath her and little did she know that the same life that had broken her spirit tonight, would bring her the sight of light back to her green and now tired of crying eyes.
After three hours that felt like they would never end, Emma finally turned into the familiar street of her grandmother's house. Regina sat on the front steps as snow fell from above; the familiar sound of the motorcycle allowed the brunette to breathe again, she was of course worried for her safety however the only thing she wanted to do was hold her.
Emma parked the vehicle and removed her full face helmet. Regina stood with dark eyes full of pain; her heart smashed as she realized the woman had to have been crying for hours. Emma released a fresh bash of tears as Regina's body collided with hers into an embrace that would linger in time.
"I'm so sorry Emma" Regina whispered with ache painted across her face.
The blonde continued to cry on Regina's shoulder as each single snow flake softly fell on and around them. The brunette's warmth merged with the blonde's trembling body speaking for every broken soul.
A/N: I hope you guys aren't hating me right now; I know it sucks! But I promise it is all part of the story and its integrity as a whole. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, much more coming soon. Please let me know what you thought and how you felt! Review!