BOCD

New Green Café

Monday, October 18

12:30 PM

"Hey, who do you think you are?" the chunky blonde girl screamed at Melody (her first big mistake). Massie smiled, waiting for Melody to work her magic.

"Hmmm, who do I think I am?" Melody asked herself (sarcasm, ahb-viously), tapping her chin. "Well, I seem to be under the impression that I'm Melody Sousa, seventeen-year-old who knows how to kick some serious ass, but, what do I know? I'm only talking about myself, so, who knows?"

Okay, what's going on?" a brunette girl, with a dry, flat bob ran up to Chunky and asked what she was getting into.

"Melody here just rammed into me!" she whined. "And, she didn't even say sorry." She attempted to stare Melody down (second big mistake) but as soon as Melody's flickering amber eyes stared at the girl, shooting out little hate-rays, Chunky turned, and Massie saw her lip quiver a little.

"What can I say? You walked right into my path, and there definitely wasn't any room to walk around you, that's for sure," Melody snapped, her anger-filled face inches away from Chunky's.

"Are you calling me fat?" Chunky screeched.

"Well…I ain't calling you skinny, big ass."

"I'M ON A DIET!!!"

"Oh, well that changes everything."

"Really?"

"Nope," Melody snapped. "So, you're on a diet you said. Does it, by any chance, collect unemployment?"

"What? No. Wait, uh, no, why?"

"Because, it is not working for you," Melody snapped. She was the queen of comebacks, which is how Massie learned what she knows today.

Suddenly, Chunky ran towards the door, with salty, tear-stained, red cheeks.

"She could season her French fries with all the salt on those cheeks," Melody whispered to Massie. Massie instantly started giggling. "You know, she may even loose, uhhh, I'd say .2 pounds." Massie burst out into hysterics.

"How could you do that to her?" Chunky's bad-hair-day friend asked.

"Kay, um, she ahb-viously can't handle a little constructive criticism. Now, normally I don't talk to trash, so BEAT IT, before I throw you in a dumpster."

"You wouldn't dare."

"Try me." Chunky's little friend stared at Melody, and as soon as Melody took a step forward, she ran away. Everyone in the Café cheered, especially the boys.

"And, that's how it's done," Melody said, to no one in particular.

"That. Was. Beautiful!" Massie told her, wiping away a fake tear. "It's, like, art or something."

"It's mean," Claire retorted.

"Look, I dunno what makes a little girl think she can stand up to me. I warned her…"

"Be-sides, Kuh-laire, she totally deserved it," Massie defended Melody.

"Look, hun, that's survival," Melody added.

"I don't know why that girl even tried to start," Massie said.

"Well, I'm glad she did." Melody said.

"Huh?" Claire and Massie said in unison.

"Ahb-viously after seeing that, nobody will e-ver try ah-gain."

"Melody Sousa!" Burns shouted, as she walked in.

"What?!" Melody snapped at her.

"Oh no," Massie said.

"Uh-oh," Claire said.

"May I have a word with you?" Principal Burns asked Melody.

"Shoot," Melody answered.

"Well, to reason to be rude about this."

"No, I mean," she sighed. "I'm sorry," she said, holding back a mixture of anger and giggles. "Go awn."

"Oh, of course; it would be an honor if you did the school's broadcast for us."

"Ah, hell, why not?" Melody answered.

"Language," Burns reminded her.

"Sir, yes sir," Melody saluted her.

"That's one strike, Miss Sousa," she said.

"Or what? I get a detention?

"More like suspension."

"She's really getting old, isn't she?" she murmured to Massie. "It won't happen again, Sir. As you were saying, Sir!" This time she spoke directly to Principal Burns.

"Strike two, Miss Sousa," Principal Burns added. "Let's go."

Melody walked away, leaving Massie and Claire behind, laughing their heads off.

Burns punched in he code to open the door for the broadcast room.

"Ah, Alicia, you're early," she said.

"Yeah, Alicia, you're early," Melody repeated in a tone so sugary sweet, Alicia actually thought she could gain weight.

"You're never too early," Alicia answered.

"Well, today, you are too early, Miss Riviera. Melody has agreed to do the broadcast, so you may be excused now."

"What?" Alicia screeched her jaw dropping.

"Awww, aren't you ah-dorable?" Melody cooed. "What don't you understand, sweetie" Melody asked in the same kind of understanding tone that pre-school teachers use when a child doesn't understand what they're doing, or when it's time to go home or take a nap. "ME-IN, YOU-OUT. Do. You. Un-der-stannnndddd?"

"Uh-bu-I-uh," Alicia stammered.

"T-t-t-TU-DAYYYY, Alicia!"

"Fine, but, Principal Burns, do you mind if I try and help her out?" Alicia asked, trying to copy Melody's super sweetness, but it just didn't sound right. Melody giggled in the corner.

Melody let out some more of her musical chuckles and said, "Wow, Alicia, your voice is soooo Splenda."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Uh, HELLO! The tooooeee-daaaaal fake sweetness." She let out a fake sight," Maybe someday you'll be able to actually get sugary words to roll off your tongue…then you won't have to try so hard."

"I wasn't trying too hard," Alicia snapped.

"Please, hun, I could smell you brain from over here. Here's a little P.S. for you, thinking like that, will give you wrinkles by the age of 20. Good luck!"

"'Scuse me?" Alicia asked.

"Don't get your granny panties in a bunch. I'm just havin' a little fun."

"I do nawt wear granny panties!"

"Oh, please, girls," Principal Burns started. "Stop the fighting, and Ms. Riviera, I think I speak for both of us when I say that comment was in-apropriate."

"Fine, kid, you wanna help, you can help."

"Alllrighttttt," Principal Burns approved, though it seemed like she wasn't sure about it. Then, she walked out, leaving the girls to themselves.

"Well, first thing's first," Alicia started. "The school is now BOCD, nawt just OCD."

"Do I look like I'm stupid? I saw all those dudes cheering for me out there. I saw the construction going on across the street."

"Kay, well you can say BO if you'd like, Burns loves it when you say BO."

"I'll say it, but only because I know you're lying, and I know that Burns will HATE IT. And I repeat to you, do I look dumb to you?"

"No, it's just that-"

"Con-tin-ue!"

"Oh, right. Yeah, just basically say what's on your mind," Alicia lied smoothly.

"Will do, you bitchiness," Melody said, as if it were the highest form of a compliment. "Now, scoot your boot out of here. You are about to witness magic! Oh, and Alicia?"

"Uh, yeah?" she mumbled.

"The gray pull-up boots are sooo last season. Try to get something that's, oh, I dunno, In?"

Alicia gasped, again, and she wanted, so desperately to stretch. She had heard that stretching relieves most of the tension in your body, and she was so sure that that was exactly what she needed.

She simply tried to compose herself, lifted her chin, pulled her shoulders back, and turned around, as she headed for the door. She thought the pull up boots looked cute over her black super-skinny jeans and her cropped down, black bomber jacket. She will win Melody over. She will not be treated like this. She walked out the door, trying to stop the babbling that was going on in her head. Was she going in-sane?

Melody started her broadcast:

"What's up, BO?" Laughter was heard all the way in the broadcast room. Oh yeah, and Burns was yelling…ahhh, music to her ears.

"So, BO, my little, uh, haha, buddy," she said sarcastically, "Alicia Riviera thought she was smart enough to screw me, so she wanted me to tell you what's on my mind. Now, that probably would be interesting an all, but some things are just too much for you. Anyways, I did happen to find a card here, which lists all of the upcoming events and whatnot. Alicia, nice try, but I always win." She paused and there was more laughter.

Back in the Café, Massie and Claire, along with the rest of the student body, were laughing their heads off. Alicia, however, was turning as red as Chanel's Rouge Hydrabase Crème Lipstick in Fire.

Melody, then, started the actual announcements:

The Briarwood Tomohawks make it to the championship. Be there, I mean it. Oh, don't be late. (She let out a small chuckle.) The game starts at 6:30 and should end at 8:30-

"Thank Gawd that's over," Alicia said to no one in particular.

Oh, and one more, quick detail. The reason the game should be ending a little later than usual is because of the two cheer-squads competing-THE TOMAHAWK DANCERS, and the Hear-nets." She mumbled everything after Tomahawk Dancers.

"Kuh-laire, I guess we know the name of our cheer squad," Massie murmured to Claire.

Finally, a little announcement of my own: If you wanna be a part of the hawtest clique at BOCD, got to table 17 for auditions. Four girls will be selected to be in the New Pretty Committee. Think about it ladies, ex-clusive sleepovers on Friday nights, that ev-er-y-one will be jealous of, VIP parties, the envy of every girl, the hearts of every boy-I would know-and, you will never be in the dark, when it comes to what's IN and what's OUT!

Peace out and rock on!

"Kay, that should be it," Alicia tried to relax herself. "Wait, Dyl, did she say auditions?"

"Yes, yes she did," Dylan said, looking a little dazed and confused.

"I've gotta talk to Massie," Kristen said, as she left her seat at the table.

When she arrived, she was surprised to see that Melody was already there, along with a line of girls, going back, so the line was about the length of ¾ of the Café. Kristen cut to the front, before Massie had anyone sit.

"Massie, auditions, really?" Kristen started.

"Name please?" Massie asked, not even looking up. She had non-prescription glasses, her hair was tied into a neat bun, and her shirt was a white, silk button up, with a black Calvin Klein cami underneath. The top three buttons were undone.

"Please, ma'am, don't get rude-just, please, tell me your name or leave," Massie said, looking up. She was smirking, which showed that this was just a big joke to her. She was testing Kristen's patience.

Kristen sighed, loud and heavy, before speaking, to show her how annoying and infantile her little game was.

"My name is Kristen Gregory."

"Ah, Kristen, we were expecting you."

"Oh, uh, okay."

"Please, have a seat, Ms. Gregory," Claire said, giggling, and pointing to the seat across from her.

"Now," Melody started, "to be a part of this clique, there ware many rules you will abide by, and there are many things you must make up for." She sounded so sophisticated, and mature. Kristen was almost hypnotized as she listened to her speak.

"Look, I can explain everything to you, but you just gotta give me a chace," Kristen whined.

"Fine," Massie surrendered. This is a trick, Kristen thought to herself. Massie doesn't just give up. What is she thinking?

"Look, I'll pick you up after school. Explain ev-er-y-THING! NEXT!" Massie called up whoever was next.

"But wha-" Kristen was cut off, as Melody took her arm, and motioned for her to go back to her table. When she didn't move, she pulled on Kristen's arm, until her feet started to shuffle forward.

When Melody arrived at Table 18, she saw Dylan, Alicia, and Dempsey, chatting a little. "Excuse me," Melody interrupted their meaningless babble. "I think this belongs to you?"

"Kristen, how could you just take off like that?" Alicia asked. "I thought we weren't going to have anything to do with Massie."

"Leesh, you can't just tell me what to do, you're not in charge," Kristen snapped.

"Wow, somebody's a little feisty, arent' we," Dempsey said.

"Hey, who's jungle-boy over here?" Melody asked, snapping her gum.

"That's my boyfriend," Kristen explained.

"Ohhh, I see," Melody said, as she eyed Dempsey. "I don't see what the big deal is," she said, as she grabbed a baked chip from Kristen's bag, and walked off.

"What was that all about?" Dempsey asked.

"You really don't wanna get into that, hun," Melody called over her shoulder. When Melody got back to Table 17, she examined the line.

"Hey, you!" Melody yelled.

"Me?" an eight grade boy stepped out of the line. He was wearing the tightest jeans, and a Baby Pink Lacoste polo shirt.

"Hun, this is a girl-only clique. Sorry," she said, actually feeling bad for the boy.

"That's cool," he said, as he sulked over to his table. All of a sudden, every boy in the Café was laughing at him.

"HEY!" Melody called out to the Café. "DOES SOMEONE WANNA TELL ME WHAT'S SO FUNNY?"

"You know what," a skater boy answered.

Melody went over to the boy in the pink shirt, and whispered something to him. He whispered back. "So, are you saying that you're laughing at my Damien? You people sicken me!" she snapped.

Skater boy instantly turned pink and said, "What, no, he's by best friend, aren't you buddy?"

"Didn't you pick on me for two years?" Damien asked.

"You might wanna step away now," Melody warned him. He backed off. She ruled this school, and she's only gonna be here for the day. Massie was ecstatic.

"Massie, continue," Melody said.

"Next," Massie called. A girl dressed in head-to-toe Hollister stepped up. She had shiny hair, down slightly passed her shoulders, but she straightened her hair right through the tangles. She had boobs, almost as big as Alicia's, but her gut stuck out-it wasn't that she was fat, but, well, losing a few pounds couldn't hurt. She was wearing sneakers-not even a brand name. She had a clear and even complexion, and sparkling eyes, that were too small and too far apart. Her nose was small, but round, and her lips were thin, but she had this really long smile.

"Name please?" Massie asked her.

"Brianna-Brianna Brause," she answered.

"Kay," Massie agreed.

"NEXT!" Melody called. "Be-lieve me, you do nawt want her."

"Hey, that's not fair!" Brianna yelled.

"Oh, cry about it, why doncha!" Melody snapped.

Their hunt went on for the rest of the lunch period.