Author's Notes: Wow...This chapter took longer to write than it should have. I've had other fanfics to work on, so I've kind of neglected this one. I'm not through with The Savage Earth yet though, and I do have an ending planned! Don't know if it'll be the next chapter or the one after that. At any rate, thank you all for reading this story and reviewing it, too! I always enjoy hearing from you :)
Chapter 14
Friendly Competition
Ever since that day when Kickback played ball with that human boy he started to realize how much he liked human sports. He would oftentimes sneak away from the rest of the group so he could spy on a human soccer game or catch a round of drag racing. It was fascinating to see what lengths the humans would go to just to prove they were the best at something. Didn't they realize that any of them could be easily squashed by a minibot no matter how good they were at kicking a ball?
Kickback collected a bunch of vines and started rolling them together over time until he had a perfectly round ball that was the perfect size for him to play kickball with. No matter how good the humans were, he knew he was better!
Bombshell, meanwhile, was having trouble figuring out the internal structure of the Decepticon chain of command. He saw that Megatron was the queen, Starscream was second to him, and Soundwave was third, but he didn't understand why.
In Bombshell's mind a subservient drone like Soundwave would make a much better SIC than a temperamental harpy like Starscream. Why did Megatron let that traitorous rat survive, let alone be his right hand mech?
He watched with fascination as Megatron and his liability of a SIC started arguing once again.
"I'm telling you Megatron this plan will never work!" Starscream shouted viciously.
"You have no imagination, Starscream…" Megatron said almost mournfully.
"It's a giant purple gryphon!" Starscream screamed as he threw his arms up in frustration, "You really want to try to conquer the earth with a giant purple bird monster?!"
Starscream was answered with a painful punch to his jaw! Megatron lifted his fusion cannon and seemed to silently dare Starscream to object further. Starscream did not answer that challenge, instead choosing to sulk and play the victim for all he was worth.
Bombshell watched this display with fascination and confusion. Starscream wasn't very respectful to his queen. Why did Megatron believe he was worthy of a position as high as second in command? Finally, he could stand it no longer! He had to ask him!
When Bombshell voiced this obvious question Megatron stared at him for a moment with his hand resting on his chin. The old gunformer seemed to ponder his words. At last, he felt he had an answer for the Insecticon.
"Do you know how I chose my ranks in the first place, Bombshell?" Megatron asked the rhinoceros beetle.
"No, Megatron. I never thought about it before," Bombshell replied.
"Millions of years ago I held a tournament, much like the gladiatorial matches I was forced to fight in when I was young," Megatron explained as he reminisced on his old life and his rise to power, "That tournament decided who lived and rose to power, or who died due to their own weakness. It was a measure of physical and mental strength and capability. Starscream won that tournament, and earned his place as my right hand mech! Even now, despite all of his treachery, I still recognize the talents that brash overconfident seeker possesses."
"I see," Bombshell nodded studiously, "So there are many people who want your job?"
"Indeed, but I am the leader because I am strong!" Megatron bragged, "Now I am curious Bombshell...How exactly did you Insecticons choose your leader?"
"Well, we, um...didn't," Bombshell admitted bashfully, "I was leader once, and then Shrapnel was leader. We never really discussed it. It just happened."
"You allowed him to usurp your throne? Just like that?" Megatron asked disdainfully, "I would sooner die than allow one of my underlings to defy my authority! That display of prowess is what separates the Decepticons from the Insecticons! You'd do well to remember that, if you ever hope to be more than what you are right now."
Those words stung Bombshell like an angry wasp. Megatron had called him many names out of spite before, but this was different. He wasn't insulting the Insecticons by calling them inferior...He was stating it like a fact.
Bombshell knew then...The Insecticons needed to formally decide who was going to be in charge. Which of them deserved to be called queen?
Bombshell returned to Bali to find Shrapnel standing out in the rain with his hands spread out as if to greet the roaring thunder clouds. Kickback was tossing around a collection of vines that had been formed into a sphere. The lightning struck Shrapnel and he laughed with unsuppressed glee!
"That's it! Feed me feed me!" Shrapnel called out to the heavens above.
"You are so weird, Shrapnel!" Kickback quipped from his spot on a drooping tree.
"Insecticons, we need to discuss something important," Bombshell said without preamble.
The other two gave Bombshell their undivided attention. He almost hated to discuss this now when they were so relaxed and having fun, but their status as superior beings was at stake! He had to get this over with! Shrapnel and Kickback listened as Bombshell explained their need to officially determine which of them was the leader. Kickback seemed fascinated by the idea, but Shrapnel fidgeted and looked wary of the prospect. He didn't want to potentially surrender his position to Bombshell or (heaven forbid) Kickback!
"So Bombshell...How exactly would this work work?" Shrapnel asked when Bombshell was finished explaining.
"I thought of that," Bombshell told him, "I think we should each think up one area of competition. That will make 3 contests total. Whoever wins 2 of the 3 contests will be our official queen! How does that sound?"
"Sounds great great! Bring it on on!" Shrapnel challenged, "I will decide the first test! I say we...Have an eating contest contest!"
"An eating contest?" Kickback repeated, "Sound like fun! What are the rules?"
"We go to a tall building in one of the human cities and start munching on a wall!" Shrapnel explained, "Whoever gets to the bottom of the building first is the winner winner! Think you can handle it, junk piles junk piles?"
"I'm gonna eat so fast you won't know what hit you!" Bombshell declared proudly, "Let's go!"
With that the three Insecticons took to the air and scouted a location for their eating contest.
They arrived an hour later in Shanghai, China. They chose a building that was about 30 meters tall and flew to the roof. They each took their own side so no one could argue they inadvertently assisted another Insecticon.
"Hey, cool! This place makes pie!" Kickback exclaimed as he read the factory's sign.
"Never mind that!" Shrapnel snapped, "On your marks, get hungry, eat eat!"
The three Insecticons started chowing down on the building with reckless abandon. Bombshell thought he was winning due to the fact that he hadn't had anything to eat all orn, but Kickback was catching up quickly! What he couldn't see was that Shrapnel was already halfway down the building! His larger mandibles made eating the walls of the building even easier.
The human workers saw the walls being leveled by the monster bugs and screamed! They tried to run, but there was nowhere to run to! If the Insecticons made it to the ground level first then they could accidentally eat anyone who was trying to escape the building! Most workers chose to stay where they were and hoped the giant bugs didn't notice them.
There was no danger of that happening. The Insecticons were too engrossed in their power games! It took 11 minutes exactly for Shrapnel to reach the bottom first! He whooped and cheered in victory! He never was a graceful winner.
Bombshell and Kickback stopped eating then. Both felt sick from consuming so many bricks, and Kickback actually purged his fuel tanks after he hopped down!
"That's Shrapnel one, and losers zero zero!" Shrapnel bragged at his two companions, "So chumps, what's next next?"
"I choose the next competition!" Bombshell shouted defiantly, "And I choose a trivia contest!"
"Who are we going to get to ask the questions?" Kickback asked.
"Hm…" Bombshell thought for a minute before saying, "Meet me back at Demon Swamp! I'll bring back a flesh creature to ask us questions!"
Bombshell then flew away, and soon Shrapnel and Kickback flew off in the opposite direction. Shrapnel was already feeling better about this competition. Soon he would earn his place as their true commander!
Shrapnel was kicking up a bunch of moss and foliage as he took out his anger on the landscape! The human that had asked the questions was cowering away from the vengeful Insecticon and hoping he would be allowed to leave. Bombshell had easily won the competition since he had the most knowledge of earth's topography, native life, and had even studied human history before the competition. Oh, he was a crafty one, and was also a tactless winner just as Shrapnel had been before.
"In your faceplate, Shrapnel!" Bombshell danced around Shrapnel and overall made a fool out of himself.
"Alright guys, so that's Shrapnel one, and Bombshell one," Kickback tabulated the results, "There's just one competition left, and I get to decide what it is!"
While he was talking the human snuck away. He didn't know how he would get out of Demon Swamp, but anything was better than getting eaten or stomped on by those monstrous bugs!
"Alright Kickback Kickback," Shrapnel intoned, "What test do you insist upon?"
"Soccer!" Kickback exclaimed jubilantly.
"What in the pit is soccer?" Bombshell asked skeptically.
"Well, if I remember correctly, each team has a net to defend, and the teams kick around a ball and try to get it into another's team net in order to score a point. You can't use your hands, and each team wears a different color so you can tell them apart," Kickback explained, "Simple enough, right?"
"Oh, you mean football!" Bombshell exclaimed once he figured out what Kickback was talking about, "Yes, yes! That game is simplicity itself! Still, how are we going to get team colors to wear?"
"We don't need to wear anything," Shrapnel insisted, "There's only one Insecticon per team team."
"Fair enough," Kickback agreed, "I'll go get the ball and then we'll build our nets!"
Needless to say, this was not soccer in the conventional sense. There were three nets, one for each Insecticon, and they were playing with a wad of vines instead of a regulation soccer ball.
The competition started in earnest, but before long Shrapnel and Bombshell both stayed right in front of their nets for fear of the other scoring a point. The two warring Insecticons were so focused on making sure the other lost that they forgot Kickback was even playing, and because of this he managed to score the most points on them! In fact, after a while he lost interest because he felt like he was playing alone.
"Hey guys, can we quit now?" Kickback asked, "We've been at this for hours! Let's just calculate the points!"
The others agreed, and looked at their scoreboard. It was Shrapnel 3, Bombshell 3, and Kickback 27! The other two looked flabbergasted as they realized that they let Kickback win because they were too focused on each other!
"Wait, I don't understand!" Kickback finally said, "If Shrapnel got 1 point, Bombshell got 1 point, and I got 1 point...Then who is our leader? Who's the best?"
The other two thought about it a moment. Shrapnel paced, and Bombshell held a hand to his chin as he pondered the implications of their findings. Finally, it was Bombshell who said "Well...I guess this means...We're equal."
"Hm...Works for me me!" Shrapnel shrugged good-naturedly.
Then the three Insecticons flew off to look for more food. They had burned off a lot of it playing soccer. They were all happy with the results of their makeshift gladiatorial match. They had proven once and for all that all Insecticons were the best. Maybe together they could overthrow Megatron and prove Insecticons were better than Decepticons...