Chapter 14

—xx—

Blaine swam up into consciousness, his eyes stinging from the sunlight peeking in through the blinds. Suddenly, he was aware of a splitting headache and, subsequently, the night before. Kurt's arms were secured tightly around his chest and he could hear his soft breathing as he snoozed against his neck. The younger boy sighed and recalled the events from the previous evening, wondering where Jesse was, what he had done when he'd left. He had never seen that look in his friend's eye. Sure, the senior was often disgruntled, but he was never livid. What's worse, the fire of hate in his eye had been completely directed at him. Blaine knew that Jesse had always been careful around him as if his feelings were a fragile thing. The older boy had been a good friend to him, caring for him and putting him back together when his parents hadn't given a damn—just shoved him off into some faraway private school.

But now his support system was gone. Racking his brain, Blaine tried to understand what, exactly, he had done to make Jesse so mad. One moment he had been comfortable in Jesse's arms, crying over someone else, and the next, Jesse had him up against the wall, kissing him for some unbeknownst reason.

Why had he done that?

Before Blaine could even register what had happened, he had felt a deep-seated anger rise in him, shoving Jesse away. He just couldn't fathom how Jesse could have possibly thought that that would fix things, that kissing him would distract him or that Blaine would have just shrugged and went along with him because he was sad.

But, no, Jesse had denied that. More than anything, the older boy had worn hurt like a second skin, before giving into his rage. If that hadn't been the reason for the sudden kiss, though, what was it? It couldn't truly be the reason that his friend had given him… Surely that had been some defense mechanism, some way to make Blaine feel equally hurt for being denied that kiss. He knew his friend could be quick to insult, knowing how to hurt someone in a very specialized way, despite the fact that he'd never used such a skill on him. Maybe he'd thought that Blaine would truly feel the pain of being accused of hurting someone close to them if he'd factored emotions into it.

Because there was just no way that Jesse St. James was in love with him.

Kurt roused next to him, mumbling something incoherent. In his deep concentration, Blaine had nearly forgotten that his friend had been there beside him. The older boy's arms slipped away from him and he sat up, making eye contact with him.

"Hey," Kurt murmured, "you doing okay?"

Blaine remained silent for a moment in the realization that he didn't know. Finally, he offered, "I… I'm confused." Kurt's eyes narrowed and he merely waited for his friend to gather his bearings and continue. "I would be able to handle this somehow if I understood why Jesse got so angry."

Kurt sat up completely and crossed his legs on the bed, "Well, I don't know Jesse that well, but maybe if you tell me what happened, I could help." He watched as Blaine mimicked the movement. "I mean, if that's alright."

Blaine shrugged and then relayed the story to his friend, doing his best to leave out the part where he was still in love with Sam Evans. "I told him that I'm in love with someone…" he frowned, "…someone I can't have. And he just sat there, comforting me like he always does, like he's always done for me. But then he made that face at me, like something was wrong…" Blaine's face screwed up in confusion, "and he, for whatever reason, kissed me. I don't know what he was thinking; and when I got mad, his explanation…" Blaine trailed off, staring off as if trying to find some reasoning, then corrected, "his defense… he lied and said he loved me."

The younger boy looked up to see his friend completely gaping at him, eyes wide. "B-Blaine… are you serious?"

"Exactly! Why would he say that? Why would he lie and think that would fix everything? Does he think that because I can't have S—I mean, someone else, that he can just fix it by taking advantage of me? I'm just so confused," Blaine huffed, "Jesse has never been this inconsiderate to me before. He's always been very careful and I just don't get why he'd hurt me like this! He looked pissed… and thinking about it makes me even more confused. I'm the one that should be upset!"

Kurt just stared incredulously. When his friend remained silent, Blaine let out a groan of frustration. His emotions were doing about eight different things at once, unable to decide if he was confused or sad or angry with Jesse. "Blaine," Kurt spoke slowly, carefully, almost as if he, too, didn't understand. "Honey, do you really not see it?" The blank stare on Blaine's face was more than enough answer for Kurt. "Good lord, Blaine. You really are completely oblivious. Jesse wasn't lying! How haven't you noticed?" He looked deep into Blaine's eyes, trying to understand. "Blaine, everyone knows."

The younger boy just stared, still unconvinced. "No. There's just no way."

"Why?" Kurt implored. "Look at the way he treats you, Blaine! Look at the things he does for you and compare them to the way he acts around everyone else. Blaine, Jesse is so obviously in love with you—why is that so impossible for you to see?"

"Because… Because he's Jesse and I'm me!"

A thick blanket of silence fell upon them as each boy let the sentence Blaine just blurted out hang in the air, staring at each other as they both let the words sink in. Blaine's eyes went wide with realization, as he realized that he had indeed spoke such vague words without thinking, just as Kurt opened his mouth to speak.

"Blaine… what does that mean?" He cocked his head, speaking softly and carefully through the tension, "What do you mean?"

"I mean…" He breathed, averting eye contact, "I mean, well, you've seen Jesse. He's just so… confident, and he's got every right to be. He's good at practically everything, and not just a little bit. I mean he kicks ass at every single thing he puts his mind to! How could a guy so sure of himself not just walk up and say he likes someone… especially a guy like me! I mean, Jesse could easily have any guy at Dalton—just the fact alone that he doesn't and he's alone gives me even more reason not to believe it! He's so above everything and everyone. If he wanted to be with me then he'd just say so, classic Jesse-style, and not take no for an answer. But, he doesn't, and why should he? If Jesse truly wanted me, he would have made his move a year ago when we met. But, he didn't—and he definitely won't now that he knows all my secrets, knows everything about me. Any part of him that might have had feelings for me is definitely not there anymore now that he knows how messed up I am."

Kurt's eyebrows, which now seemed determined to become a permanent part of his hairline, arched impossibly, his mouth slightly agape. "Jesus, Blaine." He started incredulously. "Self-depreciating much? Cut yourself some damn slack, buddy! Blaine, you're first lead in the Warblers. How is that not enough proof that you're special?" From the look on his friend's face, Kurt knew that all the encouraging in the world wasn't going to change Blaine's mind. "Listen. I can talk your ear off about what a stud you are, but I can see that it's not going to make much difference. So, I need you to do something, Blaine."

The younger boy quirked an eyebrow, "And what's that?"

"I want you to just think about everything you know about Jesse. Think about the things he's done and who he is, and, for God's sake, stop tearing yourself down for a second!" Kurt chuckled, uncrossing his legs and kneeling to put a hand on each of Blaine's shoulders. "You're my best friend, so clearly that means you're fabulous," Kurt trilled, "so stop embarrassing yourself!"

Blaine chuckled softly. "Okay, okay. But, honestly," the boy frowned, "I have no idea what to think about this. I mean, what if it's true? What does that mean?"

Climbing out of Blaine's bed, Kurt shrugged. "I can't tell you that, Blaine. That's why I'm telling you to think about it. And don't worry about anyone else, okay?" The boy strode across the room, shedding his crumpled clothes from the night before and grabbing his robe. "I know Jesse freaked, but I'm sure Sam managed to calm him down when he got home."

Blaine's eyes went wide. "Oh, shit," he mumbled. "I… didn't think about that."

The older boy turned around and leveled Blaine with a questioning stare. "Think about… what?"

"Well… don't freak out," Blaine gulped, "and I can't stress that enough, but… Sam is the guy that I told Jesse I'm in love with."

—xx—

Pain.

That was the first thing he was aware of, before he even opened his eyes. Throbbing, searing pain, pounding through his skull like every hangover he had ever experienced combined. Samuel cracked his eyes open, causing the resulting fresh agony to elicit a low groan from his lips. Raising his hand to the source of the ache, he discovered that it wasn't his forehead, but below his right eye that was its cause. Finally forcing his lids completely open, Sam fought the sting that the sunlight pouring in was causing and studied his surroundings. The first thing he realized was that he had spent the night on the floor, slumped against the side of his bed, closely followed by the fact that his room looked like it had been hit by a tornado.

And then the previous evening came flooding back to him.

Gathering his bearings, Sam pushed himself off the ground and onto his bed, where he began to piece together the events. After his date with Kurt, Jesse had shouted at him about Blaine turning him down, then punched him. Evidently, Jesse had left him where he lay, allowing him to pass out; and from the state of Jesse's side of the room, the senior had apparently gathered some of his things and promptly left. As far as where he went, Sam hadn't the slightest clue.

"Well," Sam mumbled to himself, frowning, "this is a fucking mess."

Gingerly touching what he could only assume was a black eye, Sam groaned loudly and fell back into his comforter. It was Saturday, so Jesse's sudden disappearance wouldn't affect his classes, but they had Warbler rehearsal at five and the council didn't look too fondly on unnecessary absenteeism. He couldn't imagine that Jesse would answer or return any of his phone calls after the way he acted the previous evening, but he needed to talk him down. The problem happened to be that Sam had simply never seen his friend that way, never seen him so livid and seething. And while his anger was misplaced and somewhat unnecessary, Sam knew that this was serious, that Jesse wasn't just going to let this go. Jesse most probably felt wholly justified in punching Sam and all the things he said to him. Not to mention that he was the person Jesse was angriest with, which would definitely complicate trying to calm him down.

And he didn't even know where Jesse was.

With a sigh, he sat back up, beginning to piece together the events and trying to make an educated guess on where his best friend had angrily stormed off to. He knew that his parents were doing that thing where they vacation for two months, so Sam guessed that he probably packed up his things and went home. It was the most obvious place he'd have gone to. That part was easy. The difficult part was trying to figure out how to go about talking to him. If he knocked on Jesse's front door, he was about a thousand percent sure that his best friend would slam it right in his face. Or shout at him. Or punch him in the other eye. None of which were very appealing. Usually it was so easy to talk to Jesse. Sam was always speaking from a very objective point of view, so he had no trouble telling his best friend when he was being a dramatic idiot. However' from the point of view of the person who was essentially the root of all of Jesse's problems, telling him to stop being a drama queen might prove to be rather counter productive.

A couple of short knocks jarred Sam from his train of thought and his eyes trailed to the source of the sound. Had Jesse already come to his senses and come back? Just the though alone caused Sam to chuckle softly. Besides the fact that it was absurd for Jesse to be knocking on his own dorm door, Jesse rarely blew off steam that quickly under normal conditions—of which these were definitely not.

The knocks came again, so Sam pushed himself from the bed and went to answer the door. Kurt Hummel stood on the other side, face obvious with stress, until it fell at the sight of Sam. He quickly pushed into Sam's room without a word and onto his bed.

"Sam!" He looked down from where he was standing over him, "Holy crap, what happened to you?" He carefully ran a thumb over Sam's bruise, causing him to wince slightly. "Who the hell did this to you? God, it looks—"

"That bad, huh?" He stood up with a smile, walking past Kurt to look in the mirror on his wall. He grimaced and turned back around, "Jeez, Jesse did a hell of a number. Didn't think the dude—"

"Jesse did this?!" Kurt shrieked, causing Sam to jump. "Christ, that idiot really has it coming now. I'm not about to allow him to hurtyou and Blaine!"

Sam cocked an eyebrow, trying to ignore the stab of pain under his eye when he did so. "What did he do to Blaine, exactly?" Speaking slowly, carefully, Sam's tone had a sudden edge. "He didn't hit him, did he?"

"Oh, god, no," Kurt's hands flew up, "No, not at all." With a sigh, Kurt collapsed onto Sam's bed, back first, "He was just an absolute mess when I got home last night. A sobbing, crying, emotional mess. And I've just never seen him like that." He looked over at Sam from where he lay, "How could Jesse do that to someone he loves? Is he really that awful?"

Sam pursed his lips and sat down next to Kurt, "Nah. Jesse's a good guy. He just got emotionally smacked in the face. I probably wouldn't have dealt with something crazy like that too good, either." He grinned, "Probably wouldn't have punched anyone in the face, but Jesse and I are different that way, I guess."

"How can you make excuses for him, Samuel?!" Kurt sat up, quirking an eyebrow, "He punched you in the face!"

"I'm not making excuses, Kurt," Sam stated flatly, simply. "I just know him and he is my best friend. He's not a bad guy. He's just hurt—really hurt. All I care about right now is finding him and smacking some sense into him." With a chuckle, Sam stood up, "Not literally, obviously. That probably won't help."

"Find him? Where even is he?" Kurt looked up from the bed.

With a long sigh, Sam strode over to Jesse's side of the room, fiddling with something on his desk. "I dunno for sure. I'm guessing he ditched outta here and went home since his 'rents aren't around. I guess I'll start there."

"Well, if you're going to talk to him, I'm coming with you," Kurt stated matter-of-factly, standing up. "Whether he wants it or not, he's getting a fricking piece of my mind. No one hurts Blaine like that and just gets away with it. Besides," Kurt smiled, "I think you're right about Blaine, anyway."

Sam just looked at Kurt confusedly in response.

"I don't know for sure, but it seems like he's got feelings, too. I just don't think he knows it because of the thing with you, and because he seems to have put Jesse on this insane pedestal." Kurt scoffed, "Which is just about the most idiotic thing I've ever heard."

"So, you know about all that shit with Blaine, then. Good, I didn't feel like going through all the awkwardness of explaining it." Sam chuckled and shrugged, "I guess it can't hurt? I'm pretty sure the moment Jesse sees me, he's gonna give me another black eye to match this one."

"Well, then I'm definitely going," Kurt started, striding past Sam without waiting for him to follow. "I'm an unbiased source—and I'll make him listen. I'm driving. Let's go."

—xx—

A/N: The semester's started and I'm not sure how often I'll be able to update, but I'll sure try to make it often!

maria