A/N: Well, this chapter got remarkably out of hand and, as I've heard some people have problems uploading chapters over 100KB, it'll be split into two separate chapters- 'Love' and 'Through With Me'. So, yes, this chapter's a little shorter, but the next one only requires only a little bit more editing before its ready so look for it shortly. I'll try and get it up in a couple of days- promise I'll try! Thanks for reading, and enjoy!
Deliver Me From Evil by Kiara
PART TWELVE- LOVE
Dawn jumped when she felt something brush against her neck. She twisted around, pulling out her wand…only to point it at her boyfriend. She threw herself into his arms, the anxiety she'd been feeling over seeing her mother again momentarily overcome by the relief that he was safe.
"Hey there." Connor said softly. He was surprised by her initial greeting, why would she be expecting someone to attack her? Had something happened while he was away? But, to be honest, he was most preoccupied by thoughts of his real father fighting most likely to the death. Well, to a more permanent death than the one he was currently 'living'.
When Dawn pulled back she looked him over critically. He seemed to be in one piece, physically at least, but he looked…devastated was the best way to describe it, with an unhealthy measure of guilt mixed in for good measure. Something was wrong. Dawn felt her heart lurch at the thought of something happening to a member of what had once been her family. "What's wrong? Is Angel okay?"
To her surprise he dropped down in the chair she'd been sitting in until she'd jumped up at his unexpected arrival. He buried his face in his hands and took a deep shuddering breath as the guilt threatened to overwhelm him. He'd left his father to an almost certain death. He could have helped, that's what he'd gone to do, but he'd left. There was so much he needed to say, so much to apologise for and now he might not get the chance. He needed to prove to Angel that he was okay, to show him that he could be a better son, a better person, even if he couldn't have been that person living with him. But, most of all, he could really use a father right about now.
"Connor? Con, you're scaring me." Dawn said, kneeling next to him. She'd never seen him like this, even when they were children he'd been so sure of himself.
"I left." Connor said dully, his voice sounding muffled as he spoke through his hands. "He told me to go, so I did. I left him to fight God knows what on his own."
He was surprised when she was quiet. He'd expected for the well meant comfort and placating phrases to start immediately but they didn't come. Maybe she knew that he didn't want to hear them.
He felt her arm go around his back, balancing herself as she perched on the narrow arm of the chair he was still slumped in. As she rested her head on his shoulder, he couldn't make up his mind what he felt. Was he grateful she hadn't run away despite him having done that very thing to his father? Could he turn and bury his face in her arms while she whispered soothing nonsense as he tried to blot everything out? But he didn't deserve that, he'd left Angel, he didn't want her pity and was frustrated that she didn't she didn't see how important this was. If he snapped at her, if he took his anger out on her, would she leave?
"What happened?" She asked softly, and all of Connor's other feelings were replaced by that enormous guilt again.
"When I arrived, Angel was fighting this…I don't even know what he was but Angel was loosing. I hit the other guy, made some lame joke and the next thing I know I'm fighting like I used to. Then I'm out, Angel's biting the other guy and then he's dead. The walls were shaking, the whole place was coming down around us and I can hear screaming from outside. I, God, I don't even know what was happening out there, but it was bad, Dawn. He just looks at me and tells me to go; he said that they couldn't destroy him as long as I was alive."
"He loves you." Dawn said. "All he wants is for you to be safe."
"And I repay him by just leaving?"
She flinched at his angry tone, and Connor muttered an apology.
"Did you ever think that maybe he's safer if you're here?" Dawn asked, hoping that he didn't blow up at her. He was understandably touchy right now and she didn't particularly want to set him off after everything that had happened today. "If you were there, then he would have been constantly worrying about you, looking out for you. He would have been distracted and I don't know what he's facing, but he'll need his wits about him."
She sighed as he remained silent. Hopefully that meant that he was at least considering what she was saying. "Con, I know how you feel. Buffy's been off hunting these…these super-demons for the Order since Christmas and, aside from a letter every now and again, I have no idea how she is. We've just got to know that by being here, by not getting in the way and learning better how to fight Voldemort, that we're doing what's best. It's difficult, but life's not meant to be easy. We get by the way we can and hope for the best."
He stared at the wall in front of him. He recognised that what Dawn was saying made sense, but until he knew that Angel was safe he couldn't let go of that guilt gnawing away inside of him. There was too much to do, too much to say and he'd never forgive himself if he didn't get the chance to say it. He nodded curtly, not really trusting himself to speak.
Dawn felt his head jerk. She twisted to place a kiss on his jaw line before sitting more comfortably against him. She didn't know how long they would be waiting for news from Angel, sometimes these battles could be over quickly, sometimes they lasted all night. Connor sat, staring ahead in silence. She knew he was feeling guilty, she also knew that nothing she said would make him feel better.
When she'd fallen asleep, exhausted from the day's events, she didn't know. But when she was woken by Connor getting up from where he'd sat next to her it was still dark outside, though the fire in the grate had burnt itself out. As Connor grabbed the letter from the nervous house elf, she muttered the charm to relight the fire, watching him carefully for any sign as to the outcome of the battle.
Connor opened the letter anxiously. It had to be from Angel- no one else would write him, via the headmaster, at this time of night. And if was writing then that meant he was alive, right? Or someone had written it for him. Much to his irritation, his hands shook slightly as he unfolded the grubby piece of paper.
Connor. [he read]
The worst is over. We have a long way to go, but we've made a big step towards winning. They're running from us, son, but we'll catch them. I hate to have to tell you this, especially in a letter, but we've lost Wes, and Gunn's seriously injured. I don't know how much you remember, but they've both always done what they believed was best for you.
I never expected you to come to help and, as your father, I feel that it is my job to tell you that you better not put yourself in so much danger again. It was very reckless of you. But thank you. To see you there...well, it meant a lot.
I have to cut this short, we still have work to do. Stay safe,
Dad.
"He's okay." Connor said hoarsely. He reread the letter again, just to double check and then gave it to Dawn to read. "He's really okay."
"That's great, Con." Dawn said with a smile. Then she frowned. "How long was I asleep? You could have woken me you know."
"I know." He did know that. She would have talked with him if he'd have wanted her to. "You were only asleep for an hour or so."
Was that all? She'd have expected it to be longer before they heard anything from Angel. "Well that was quick."
Connor shrugged. It was plenty long enough for him, he'd been waiting on tenterhooks ever since he'd left L.A. "Well it took me a while to walk back up from the Shrieking Shack and get into Hogwarts without getting caught. Plus I kind of took a detour to the Hogs Head."
She froze where she was. She'd been going out of her mind with worry, and he'd had a drink? That was a whole new level of insensitivity. "You did what? Are you mad? Anything could have happened just hanging about in Hogsmeade. Are you trying to get yourself killed?"
"What?" Connor was surprised at her reaction. "Dawn, it wasn't late- there were a couple of seventh years still down there when I left. It's not a big deal."
"Not a big deal? Anything could have happened!"
Connor frowned. This had to be about more than him just stopping on the way back to the castle for a drink. "What's wrong? Has something happened?"
"I…When I was walking back to the castle, I saw my mum." Dawn admitted. She hadn't been going to tell him, he'd been worried about Angel and Cassandra would be long gone by now, it was over.
Still, concern filled his face as he checked for injuries. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine, Connor." She assured him and it was true. Mostly. Okay, so she was a bit freaked out and jumpy, but that would pass.
"Your sure? I just…shit…I don't…shit." He repeated. "What happened? Why didn't you tell me?"
She answered the easier question first. "I was walking back to Hogwarts and I walked down that alley by Madam Pudifoots- she used the imperious. We had a nice little chat- you'll be glad to know she approves of you."
He returned her ghost of a smile. "And why wouldn't she?"
"We argued a bit, about her leaving mainly, until Potter and Granger showed up. Faith had been checking up on me and she knocked her into the wall, so I apperated us back here. And that was all."
"Did anyone see Faith?" Connor asked urgently. If anyone had seen that then her life was in serious danger.
"No, I'm sure."
"Did she hurt you?" Connor asked after a pause.
"No lasting damage." Dawn quipped lightly. A tried and tested coping method. A part of her was mad at herself for letting Cassandra get the upper hand, another part wondered what she'd done wrong. How could her own mother treat her like this? They were meant to have unconditional love and even though she thought that she'd come to terms with the way her mother was, seeing her again made her feel like the little girl who used to wonder what she'd done to make her mummy hate her. It may not have really happened, but she those memories and feelings so it may as well have. Would it be too much for the monk's to put her in a functional family?
Connor eyed her critically, not buying her dismissive attitude. "Does your Dad know?"
"Yeah, and he fussed all evening. The only way I could get rid of him was by telling him I was going to bed."
"You should go to bed, get some rest. The cruaticus curse is no small thing." He was hoping that she'd dispute the last bit, tell him that she hadn't used that curse. But she didn't. He'd grown up with a Death Eater for a parent, he didn't need to use much imagination to know what they were capable of. They don't think twice about using an unforgivable curse.
Dawn rolled her eyes. "And now you sound like Dad."
"Dawn," he said reaching out for her. "This is me. I know. I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you."
"She's gone." Dawn muttered.
"I know." Connor said simply.
"She won't be coming back." Dawn said, more to herself than to him.
"Let's hope not." Connor said in the same tone. Let her take the pace of the conversation.
"It wasn't so bad." She whispered, relaxing into his embrace. She bit on a ragged fingernail as Connor rested his chin atop her head and linked his arms around her waist. They stood in silence for a while- it had been a hell of a day for both of them.
"The first time was the worst." Dawn finally whispered. "Even though it was only a weak curse. I know it's stupid, but I wasn't expecting it even though it was just like when I was a kid. I guess I should know better than to talk back."
"It's not your fault, Dawn. You haven't done anything to deserve it."
"I know." Dawn muttered, but Connor could tell she doubted herself. He knew, it had taken him years to stop doing it himself.
"Last summer I got into an argument with Lucius." Connor revealed quietly. He didn't talk about this usually. "I was doing some school work in the drawing room when he came in. He was in a bad mood so I started clearing my stuff away. Then he saw a leaflet that Flitwick had given out in his class. It was about a post-Hogwarts charms thing to prepare us for a career as part of Gringrotts. Adding security charms or some such rot, I wasn't even considering it. Try telling him that. Actually, looking back, I think he believed me, he just wanted to take his bad mood out on someone who wouldn't fight back. I took it, just like always. But then, that's what we do isn't it? Hide behind the mask? I think Mother was actually worried about me, she even brought my meals to my room herself when I couldn't leave it."
"That's horrible." Dawn murmured, looking up at him. She knew why he was telling her this, he wasn't usually one for sharing like this. He wanted her to admit that it wasn't her fault. But it was one thing to know that in theory, another to actually know it.
"That's life." Connor said a touch bitterly. "We make our own choices, and we're responsible for them. No one else."
"I know." She meant it. "I love you." She meant that too.
"Love you too." He smiled and kissed her. "And I thought you needed rest."
"Spoilsport." She pouted, but she was unable to stop the yawn that threatened. Now he mentioned it, she was a bit tired. "Okay, I'm going."
She walked away a few paces before turning to look at him. "Well? Aren't you coming? To sleep." She added firmly causing him to grin. It might have taken them a while to get there, it might take a while longer still, but he had a feeling they'd be alright in the end.
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It was three days since the Quibbler had printed Harry Potter's article, making it the fastest selling issue ever. Educational Decree 27 had made the possession of the Quibbler an expellable offence, but everyone had read it. Including the Slytherins.
Connor nearly laughed out loud when he saw that Potter had named his father. The kid had guts, he'd give him that much. To name several inner circle Death Eaters when Voldemort was already gunning for you was not the smartest move, but it did have style. He wondered if the hate mail had started arriving at Malfoy Manor yet.
It had been the day after the article had been released when Connor had first seen Potter. The younger boy was nervous, looking around the deserted corridor in resignation and certain he was about to be hexed.
Connor reached into his bag and pulled out a copy of the Quibbler that he'd confiscated from Hermione earlier that day. The girl had been distributing them in the library, making sure that it was available to all the students. He'd seen her looking around shiftily, making sure that no one was watching and had immediately gone over to see what she was up to and confiscate points from Gryffindor- he was still a Slytherin after all. When he'd seen what she was doing he regretted coming over. He wanted people to read that article, it would be easier to fight Voldemort with an army behind them rather than people living in a scared denial. But there was no going back and he confiscated the magazine, deducted house points and lectured her about the risk of expulsion. She'd given him a haughty look in response, he had to admire her defiance, and he'd smirked, shoving the illegal item into his bag. Now he rolled his eyes at the 'woe is me' picture of Potter on the front cover and handed it over to a suspicious Harry.
"I believe this belongs to Granger. Interesting reading. A bit different to Skeeter's usual style isn't it?" He'd said quietly.
"What? You mean actually reporting the truth?" Harry had replied boldly.
Conner inclined his head, and Harry swore he saw a flicker of a smile. "Perhaps."
Harry was surprised by the response, expecting Connor to be angry at him for accusing his father. Draco had already tried to curse him once that he knew of and he'd been treated to many dark glares from the Slytherin table. Before he could think to say anything more, Connor had already moved on so Harry hurried back to the common room to tell Ron and Hermione. The more he saw of Connor Malfoy, the more he saw how different he was from the rest of his family.
When Connor got back to Slytherin, he immediately hunted down Dawn. It was getting to be a rare sight, for him to be without her and although some of his housemates were making comments, he found himself not caring.
When he found her, she waved a piece of paper in his face excitedly.
"Buffy wrote me again!" She explained, looking relieved. She had been worried about her sister, especially since contact had been limited to a few brief letters. "She says she wants us to visit at Easter and everything's been taken care of."
"Was there ever any doubt?" Connor said pleased that his reassurances had not been unfounded. Buffy and the slayers had been assigned to taking out some of the demons Voldemort had recruited. From what Connor could remember from his previous life and tidbits picked up in DADA and Care of Magical Creatures, the demons she'd been fighting were only lower level. Voldemort, it seemed, didn't have the confidence to go after the more independent, upper level demons. Minions would not be a problem for the 'Greatest Slayer of all Time'. And besides, Dumbledore would not have sent her on the mission unless he thought she would win.
"I know it was just routine, I know she could handle it. I just worry. Anyway, she says Angel's still helping out and he's fine. Well, 'uber-annoying' was the phrase she used, but I know she meant fine."
He kissed her on the forehead as he sat down at the desk, pulling out books. He was relieved to hear about Angel. He'd only gotten one short letter since he'd left him at Wolfram and Hart and he'd been most relieved to find out that his father had survived.
"You've got work?"
"Essay for McGonagall, due tomorrow." Connor replied as he tried to smooth the creases out of his parchment and make sense of his notes. He'd been more restless lately, probably something to do with the extra strength and energy that came with being part-vampire. He was considering taking up running or something to get rid of that pent up energy.
"Connor Malfoy behind on work, wonders will never cease." Dawn teased.
"Must be your bad influence." He retorted, quill already flying across the page.
"Ha ha." It wasn't often that noise from the Common Room could be heard upstairs, but Dawn could definitely here the faint sound of laughter. "What's going on?"
"Not sure. Umbridge told me she was going to sack Trelawney today, maybe it's something to do with that."
"Teachers pet." Connor gave her a look. He would not be anything's 'pet'. "What? It's true, Con. She bites everyone's head off for the slightest thing, but not yours. It's that Malfoy charm. She's fallen for it hook, line and sinker."
Connor shrugged. "Whatever keeps her off my back is fine by me. She wants me to go to her office after dinner, something about a squad of some sort."
Dawn groaned. If it was Umbridge's idea, then it wouldn't be good. "Oh Merlin, what's she planning now?"
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Faith looked up the minute she heard the door open. It could only be one of a handful of people. "Any word from Angel?"
Dawn rolled her eyes. "Hello to you too."
"You know I've never been big on social niceties."
Dawn grinned at the truth of the statement before answering her first question. "Angel's gonna stick with Buffy for now."
"I bet he is."
"She's already started rambling about cookie dough in her letters and it's only been a day. I think the Spike-Angel combination is sending her a bit insane."
"Already?" Faith raised one eyebrow impressed. "Damn, it takes at least a week for me to have that effect on her."
"I can send her schizo in an hour."
"No need to brag. You have genetics on your side."
"True. How's patrolling going?" Dawn asked with a false air of casualness which did not fool Faith in the slightest. Everyone had been on edge since the Death Eaters escape, not in the least Dawn.
"Slowly. We've even branched out to Hogmeade and there's still not much happening. A few underlings here and there, but that's all. It's making Illyria pissy."
"Just Illyria?"
"I might be getting a tad itchy." Faith admitted. It was no secret that all slayers loved a good fight. No matter how much they tried to be normal, after a week they would get restless. It was just the way they functioned. The severe lack of things to kill in the Hogwarts forest and surrounding villages was starting to take effect and Faith was looking forward to taking a holiday to the Hellmouth. "If that boy of yours ever wants to spar, send him my way. It's not that much fun hitting on a demi-god who could swat you like a fly."
"Sure." Dawn shrugged. Connor had been itching for a fight too. It would do him good to let it out on a slayer rather than another Slytherin. "But if you break him, I'll let Illyria swat you."
"Yeah, yeah. You have you own personal lackey. Rub it in. How you doing anyway? I think Illyria's actually worried about you."
"I'm fine, really." Dawn tried to loose the stiffness from her voice. She'd be a lot better when her mother was back behind bars, but until then she was doing as well as could be expected.
"Maybe you should tell Buffy."
"Maybe we should find her first so that Buffy will have something to unleash her rage on." Dawn countered. "You know how she'll take it."
"Yeah, the same way the rest of us will. Try not to worry about it though. Illyria's on constant watch and I'm up for kicking a little Death Eater ass. We won't let her try anything."
Dawn plastered a fake smile on her face. Though she appreciated the sentiment she really wanted this conversation to be over. "I know."
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Connor leant against the wall hoping not to see anyone running past. If they did, then, as a prefect and not-so-proud member of the new inquisitorial squad, he would have to stop them and take them to Umbridge. And he didn't want to do that; as far as Connor was concerned, if Potter wanted to start a club to fight Voldemort then the best of luck to him. Anything that would help tip the odds in their favor was fine by him.
He heard, and ignored, the heavy footsteps running down the next corridor. But he couldn't ignore the pained shout that followed it and set off at a run to see what was going on.
"Professor Umbridge! I've got one!"
Was that Draco's voice? As Connor rounded the corner, he heard his brother gloating about a tripping jinx to Harry Potter who was still sprawled on the ground.
"You idiot, what do you think you're doing?" Connor hissed, dragging Harry to his feet. "Go."
Harry, still disorientated from his fall, blinked and swayed on his feet.
"What?" Draco asked, torn between confusion and anger. Why was his brother helping Harry sodding Potter?
"Are you thick? He's helping to fight-"
"Mister Malfoy!" Umbridge's voice drifted down the corridor.
With a groan, Connor reached out, grabbed Harry's robes and slammed him back against the wall. He made sure to keep him pinned there by the shoulder, as Draco watched on confused and Professor Umbridge approached.
"Nice work, Mister Malfoy." Umbridge said approvingly.
"He was trying to get to the bathrooms." Connor said, giving Harry a shake for good measure. He cursed his brother's stupidity under his breath.
Umbridge smiled cruelly. "Take him to Dumbledore's office while I check in with the others."
Harry found himself being hauled roughly down the corridor, until they rounded the corner when the grip on him suddenly loosened. Okay, now he was really confused.
"I'm gonna have to take you to Dumbledore's office."
Connor had spoken so quietly, not even looking at him, that Harry wasn't entirely sure what he had said. "Huh?"
"If I don't take you to Dumbledore, Umbridge will know that it's me." Connor said very slowly as if talking to someone deeply stupid.
"So?"
Connor rolled his eyes. Honestly, every time he thought about giving Potter a chance, the kid just ruined it. "So it wouldn't look good. Besides, it wouldn't make a difference, she knows about you now."
Harry considered his options. If Connor thought that he was going to come quietly then he was sorely mistaken. His hand began slowly inching for his wand until-
"Don't even think about it kid. Let's forget than I could curse you where you stand, I know several ways to kill you before you say 'Avada'." Connor said, managing to sound both threatening and amused at the same time.
"And this is meant to be reassuring me that you're not evil?" Harry snarked, following after Connor nonetheless.
Connor resisted the urge to throttle the boy. He just rubbed him up the wrong way, whatever he said. He decided to change the subject before his did something that he would (possibly) regret later. "I don't know how much Umbridge knows, but I do know that it's not all that much. Don't tell her anything and you might not get expelled."
Harry was about to ask how he was going to get away with that against a teacher who wasn't opposed to torture, but they were already approaching Dumbledore's gargoyles.
"I'd put money on Dumbledore already knowing what you've been up to, so let him bail you out. As usual. And, for Merlin's sake Potter, learn to be a bit sneakier next time." With that Connor gave him a shove up the staircase before turning on his heel and heading back to his common room.
Harry glared after him. He still didn't like the Malfoys'. Even if they weren't evil.
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"I heard you caught Potter's vigilante group."
If he was anyone else then she would have made him jump, but he'd heart her heart beating, smelt that scent that was uniquely Dawn. "Yeah- wait, how did you know? It happened less than an hour ago."
"Everyone's talking about it." Dawn answered simply. She sat down next to him, leaning into his side. She got out a roll of parchment and a quill and went back to the homework she'd been doing. Everything seemed to be happening this year. It was far less stressful going to school in America.
"Fantastic." Connor muttered. Because he really loved being the subject of school gossip.
"Well, that and Drake was up here, bitching about you stealing his thunder."
"I didn't mean to." He protested, earning himself a glare from Dawn as he jiggled her from her comfortable position.
Dawn rolled her eyes, tucking her legs up under her and resting her work on her knees. She chewed the end of her quill absently as she read what she'd written. "Whatever, don't tell me you didn't enjoy the chance to shop Golden Boy to the headmaster."
He smirked, looking very much the Malfoy. "There was a certain amount of satisfaction."
"I'll bet." Dawn said, shaking her head. Boys will be boys and all that.
Connor looked over her shoulder at what she was writing. Charms. How tedious. That wasn't entertaining at all. "So…Dumbledore's been fired."
Dawn dropped her quill. "He what?"
Ha, that got her attention. "Yeah, Potter got sent to Dumbledore's office and Fudge was there. Dumbledore admitted forming an army so Fudge tried to arrest him and now Dumbledore's done a runner. Fudge is searching the school for him as we speak and is damn near having a nervous breakdown. The weasel twins have a pool over when he cracks."
Her eyes boggled. "You were only gone for an hour!"
He smirked, unable to pass up such an easy line. He brushed back her hair and kissed her neck. "Well, you know what I can get done in an hour."
Dawn rolled her eyes, well used to his quips and innuendos by now. She was getting better, she hardly ever blushed nowadays.
"I'll give you three guesses who the new headmaster will be."
"If you don't get it on the first guess, then I have severely overestimated your intelligence." A voice came from the shadows.
Connor immediately leapt back from his girlfriend. "Professor Dumbledore! Err, what are you doing here sir?"
"Hiding." Dumbledore said very seriously. He squinted round the room, closing the heavy curtains with a wave of his wand. "As you were about to accurately guess before my rude interruption (which I do apologize for), Professor Umbridge will be announced as temporary headmistress in my absence."
Dawn and Connor exchanged worried glances. They were under Dumbledore's protection, for the moment at least, and if he was a wanted criminal than that would probably make things more difficult. And not just for them; Dumbledore was a big part of the school- the thing that had kept it free of Voldemort's influence (for the most part) during his first reign. If he left now, then it would be like putting a big 'Welcome Voldemort' sign outside the castle.
"And while I have every intention of staying on the grounds," said Dumbledore, reassuring their fears, "I may not be as… available as I once was. And in these times I would rather be here to guide my students."
Dumbledore trailed off. This really had come at the most inconvenient time. With so many doubting Voldemort's resurrection, the pressure was on those who knew the truth, especially as Delores was doing her utmost to crush the spirit of anyone who dared to speak out. He suspected that now the truth regarding 'Dumbledore's Army' (that name make him smile every time) was out, her High Inquisitor's tactics would not be limited to Harry.
He looked again at the two Slytherins. He knew there was a time when they would have to speak out. They would not be able to hide at Hogwarts forever, tucked away in the senior prefect's rooms where no one would bother them. He just hoped that at that time they would step up and not shy away.
He shook his head. Now was not the time for these thoughts, hopefully there would be plenty of time to prepare for that. Hopefully.
"Though I have come to see that you will all support each other when it matters. It is our friends which are our greatest support at times like these." Dumbledore said, offering a last piece of advice before he left.
He just hoped that they would heed his words.
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The next half of this chapter will follow in the next couple of days. Till then, please review.
