A/N: Sorry this one took a while…nothing here but a bit of a transition so that we can move on to the next phase so to speak. Hope you enjoy the little bit of happy I tagged on to the end ;)

Chapter 14

Loud angry music was blaring throughout the garage reverberating off every surface, making the tools that Edward had sitting on the bumper of Bella's truck practically shake.
True, he may have the background of a highly trained pianist but Edward was not above appreciating other types of music and today all he wanted the mind numbing noise of some classic, teeth rattling metal.
It was pretty common for Edward to use music as a way to escape, but it also helped him focus—today he was undoubtedly using it for a little bit of both.

His mother and Bella had been gone from the house for a while and Edward had been in his zone, busy trouble shooting problems and figuring out solutions, but he'd grown tired of the silence and the periodic sound of his own voice, as he talked to himself about his troubles with Bella or cussed at stubborn bolts that refused to budge without straining every last muscle in his body—he'd come to think at one point that whatever fool had last worked on this truck must have been some sort of mutant, or they could have been closely related to grizzly bear at the very least. Even with the rust and the wear and tear there was no other way to account for why this thing was fighting him so.
Finally becoming aggravated by just about everything he'd taken a break and gone inside—up to his old room to root around though the old CDs he'd left there for a few minutes.

CDs in hand, he'd grabbed a soda from the fridge on his way back out and spent the next half hour loading the disk changer that his father had installed that summer when they'd decided to spend time bonding over his old Range Rover.

The music, as loud as it was and as chaotic as it sounded, had begun to sooth him almost instantly. He figured that if he couldn't hear himself think then there was no need to—and that was just the way he wanted things for now.

Earlier in the day Edward had changed into the old outfit that he'd been wearing when he'd arrived on his sister's doorstop a few days ago, before he and Bella made their way over to his parents' house. He had done so because he knew that Alice would never forgive him if he were to get any of the new pieces that she'd picked out for him dirty or damaged while working on Bella's old truck, but he didn't miss one bit of the symbolism his state of dress suddenly seemed to indicate.

No longer wearing designer jeans or high priced shirts, Edward would seem to have basically reverted back into the shy, unspeaking man he'd been before meeting and getting to know Bella, as far as anyone else was concerned. He knew that he was still capable at this point but the thing was, he didn't want to talk and he didn't want to be around anyone right now; he was brooding and moody following his restless night and his equally disappointing morning and he was embarrassed for anyone to see it. He was also angry with himself for not paying more attention or considering other options that might have prevented this setback that he and Bella were now being forced to face.

Additionally, his overall mood aside, he wasn't happy with his own lack of effort today; the only thing he'd said to Bella since they'd gone their separate ways this morning was a simple request while she'd been driving them over to his mother's.

He'd needed her to show him what the truck had been doing, so he asked that she speed up and drive over fifty for a bit. As she followed his orders, slowly accelerating, he'd reached over and turned off the old static prone radio so that he could listen carefully. It didn't take long after the truck had rumbled to its seemingly maximum speed for it to repeatedly stutter and skip. There was a gentle lurching, as it seemed to lose some of its power for a second before resuming the desired speed each time. Bella had carefully backed off of the gas to let the truck run at a slower pace after only a brief moment, unwilling to showcase her truck's deficiencies any more clearly than was necessary.

Edward had simply nodded to let her know that he was satisfied before adjusting the radio back to its previous volume. He then crossed his arms over his chest and returned his attention to the passing scenery. Neither one had anything else to say after that; the most communication they'd managed since being nothing more than a little wave and a pitiful smile that they had exchanged right before she had gone off with his mother.

With that in mind, the only bright spot in his day so far had been determining that the problem with her truck had been as he'd suspected, but he wasn't entirely sure that he was happy about that either.
He would only need to make a few minor adjustments to her carburetor, clean out the fuel lines that fed into the engine and check to make sure the meager electrical system was firing properly. All total he should be able to get her truck running smoothly after just a few short hours of work, but he really had hoped that it would be something more complex. Not only would he enjoy the challenge, as a way to keep his mind busy, but he also didn't want her leaving with things being the way they were between them. He wanted a reason to insist that she stay for a few more days—hell he would take a few more hours of her time if meant that they could figure some things out and make the easy comfortable connection they'd once felt return.

If he were prone to lying then perhaps he could force himself to tell her that the truck was unsafe, unable to be repaired, or going to take a lot more attention than he'd anticipated, but he knew that he could never bring himself to do that. So instead, as a way to preserve his sanity, hide from his thoughts and release his frustrations, he'd cranked up his music to a decibel level that was sure to drown out his heartache and attempted to press forward.

He would make himself fix her truck as he had promised he would, and he would see her off this afternoon so that she could go visit her father and pack up the things she still hadn't been able to move into the new house yet. Then he would wait on her to come back to him and see if, what he'd hoped was turning into something special between them might still be possible.

On the flipside of things, Esme had been excited about their little outing today, but all Bella could think of was how disappointed she'd been seeing Edward stand next to her after they'd greeted his mother, his hands pushed deep into his pockets and his head bent forward the same as it had been all morning.

"I'll be outside," he'd mumbled softly during one of the few breaks his mother'd had to take in order to breathe during her review of the shopping plan she'd just come up with, before turning on his heel, exiting the same way they had come.
She knew that things were a little tense and that he was beginning to pull away from her, but their serious lack of communication today was the hardest thing to understand. If only they could talk about things in a bit more detail, then maybe she would feel better about the decisions she'd already made.

Bella had resigned herself to going along with Esme this morning, since their arrival had been so much earlier than anticipated. She didn't want to sit around the house by herself and she didn't feel comfortable keeping Edward company while he got started on her truck, so it had been the best alternative; but with everything that was weighing on her mind today, Bella now felt like she'd been riding around with Edward's mother for hours, even though they'd just taken a quick trip up to the store to gather the ingredients they would need in order to bake this cake that Esme had been so excited about. She should have known that with the Cullen's living on the outskirts of town the way they did, it was always going to be a trip to get any place.

Thinking back, it had been obvious that Esme had noticed the significant change in their demeanor towards one another. She'd given an exasperated sigh after Edward had walked away seeming to almost forget that Bella was still standing there with her. And of course, to offer her some much appreciated consolation, Esme had ushered things along with her usual sense of understanding.

"Come on dear, let me grab my bag and we'll be on our way. Edward prefers a bit of alone time when he's got some project ahead of him anyway."

Once Esme had left her to gather her things, Bella had gone out to the porch for some fresh air and noticed that Edward was nowhere to be found—it was almost as if he'd vanished. In that moment she suddenly realized that this was going to be so much harder than she thought it would be.
She'd not been able to bring herself to really speak with him since the depressing little exchange that had happened in the kitchen first thing today, and she feared that he wasn't just taking some time to himself. It was becoming clear to her that he was falling back into his old habits, further and further with each passing minute. Knowing that this had been her decision and therefore her fault was something that was beginning to weigh heavily on her mind.

Unable to keep herself from remembering how easy it had seemed in the beginning—all it had taken was a friendly smile and a willingness to be there for him to bring about such a change in his usual demeanor, she was starting to feel her resolve begin to crumble. The memories made her regret having to deal with her own problems just now even more, but she couldn't help that she was feeling scared and uncertain; she hated that her own issues were now causing Edward to seemingly lose what progress he'd been able to make lately.
Thankfully though, before she had been able to dwell on things for too long, Esme had come to stand beside her, and hooking an arm through one of Bella's they'd headed off towards the garage.

"I'll just go and check with Edward to see if there's anything that we might need to pick up for him and I'll be right with you." Esme told her then, sending her off towards the far entrance of the large four-stalled building that held the Cullen cars.

She had slipped the keys for her conservative BMW sedan into Bella's palm so that she could go ahead and open the car for herself before going off in the other direction to find Edward.
Bella could see that he already had her truck backed in to the open bay down at the opposite end of the garage, but she really didn't have it in her to go say hello or goodbye or whatever would seem appropriate just then. She wanted to talk to him and try to explain a bit more clearly what she was thinking and feeling but she had no words to express her concerns.
It wasn't like he had forced her to do anything; he hadn't demanded her consent or pressured her to see his side of things, so in essence she really had no reason to be upset or afraid of what had transpired between them. This left her with no way of explaining her reaction except to share the truth of her past and the fact that she wasn't as recovered from the ordeal as she would like for others to believe.

She was already convinced that Alice or some other member of his well-meaning family might have given him an indication as to her issues, based on his easy understanding and she was actually quite thankful for whomever it had been, for seeing the need to be so upfront on her behalf; had Edward taken things just a bit further last night she would have undoubtedly let him and she would now be regretting their very first everything.

Bella went ahead and unlocked the car but instead of getting in she stood peering over the top of it so that she could see Edward and his mother talking down the other end of the building, reliving in her mind yet again the events that had led them here.

He'd located a new jacket that Alice had thought to purchase for him this morning; this one was lighter and more of an all-weather variety, to combat the rainy days and the cool windy nights that one could expect around here. It fit him well and she loved the way it added just a little something to the casual clothes he'd changed into today, allowing her to finally conclude that this was his best look.

She could see now that he had already taken the jacket off and had hanging from her truck's passenger side mirror. The hood was up and he was comfortably leaning against the front studying the engine compartment, his hands resting on his hips, his shirtsleeves rolled up to expose the firm, sinewy muscle of his forearms.
She couldn't hear what was being said but she could see that he was shaking his head ever so slightly from time to time—never making eye contact with Esme as she spoke with him. After this went on for a few moments he finally nodded instead and with that his mother started to walk back towards her.

"Alright my dear, let us be on our way then." She'd smiled encouraging Bella to join her.

Bella nodded, but before she let herself slid into the waiting vehicle she ventured on last glance in Edward's direction only to find that he was looking her way this time. She swallowed hard feeling a bit self-conscious all of a sudden, before she raised her hand in a discreet little wave, needing him to know that she was still going to try. Edward gave a subtle nod to acknowledge her, but what meant the most was seeing the right side of his mouth pull up just a touch, creating a rather sad imitation of his crooked little smile. It wasn't quite the same but it was enough.

Esme for her part in this little drama had been carefully staying away from the subject that was truly on her mind throughout the outing that she and Bella had taken; but as the day went on she was beginning to lose patience. Finally, when they'd arrived back at the house and she saw the desperate look on the poor girl's face as she turned towards the garage, she had decided it was time to say something.

"Don't worry too much about him. He always does his best work when the music is just a few notches above deafening." She'd teased. "When his was younger I had to have his room soundproofed and the walls lined with noise reduction fabric, just so that the rest of us could stand it when he'd get on a roll with his studying. One would think that he'd have massive hearing loss by now, but it's never seemed to bother him."

She explained all of this while they divvied up the packages to be carried inside, the pulsating sounds of Edward's music filtering out across the yard.

"He's quite a quandary isn't he?" Bella sighed, carefully following his mother inside with her arms loaded down with groceries.

"Indeed he is." His mother agreed with a little chuckle.

She went to retrieve the recipe she had in mind once they'd made it inside, so that Bella could look things over while she started to unpack some of the bags they'd carried in, and in a very cautious manner she started to dig for a little bit of information.

She knew that two grown people could have any number of things happen between them that would warrant some type of drastic change in their relationship, negative or otherwise, and for the most part whatever that might be should be of no concern to anyone else. This however was Bella and Edward. She and Alice had already discussed at great length the sensitive nature of their situation, and she believed as her daughter did, that they would most likely require a bit of guidance during this process.
As hard as it was for a teenager to seek the advice of a parent or peer when questioning the subject of first love and relationships it would be doubly hard for these two, being at an age where one would assume that they'd already been down this road a time or two. Esme truly hoped that Bella would understand that she was there for her if she felt the need to talk to someone.

"I spoke with Alice this morning, before you two showed up. She said you were going back to Forks this afternoon?"

"Uh huh." Bella nodded, her teeth biting into her lower lip as she pretended to study the recipe still.

"I'm sure Charlie will be excited to see you. How long do you suppose you'll stay?" Esme was so pleasant and unassuming with her conversation that Bella didn't really mind, though she still found the probing questions somewhat obvious.

"I'll be back Sunday at the latest." She offered, not knowing what else to say.

She hadn't taken time to call her dad yet, as this had all come about so suddenly. She had meant to contact him earlier in the week knowing that her plan had always been to visit and pack up her things this weekend, but with the arrival of Edward and now the unexpected need for this trip she'd neglected to inform him of her plans.

"Well, I was thinking that you could take some of the cake with you, since I know how your father feels about that sweet tooth of his." She teased gently, "That is if Edward doesn't manage to eat the whole thing before you leave."

"Edward likes cake that much?" Bella found herself asking before she could remember that she was supposed to be feeling depressed today.
Despite all of her concerns she still had such a desire to know everything about him.

"A strong cup of black coffee and anything covered in chocolate will have that boy on his knees in no time." She winked mischievously.
Esme actually made herself chuckle with that little comment. So much so that she had to turn her back to Bella and hide her expression for a moment before she might continue.
"He's much like his father that way, and I know you've seen how Carlisle will race through a meal if there's the promise of chocolate waiting at the end."

Indeed she had, and the memory of the times she had witnessed just that made her giggle.

"Must be a man thing." Esme nodded, satisfied that she'd at least gotten Bella to smile while mentioning Edward.

With that out of the way, Esme took a step back and let the conversation drift to more mundane topics until the opportunity to try again presented itself.

"Did Edward happen to mention how long he thought it would take to fix the truck after you all left last night?" she was able to ask, shortly after she'd noticed Bella glance at the clock on the stove on more than one occasion over the past fifteen minutes.

She shook her head to answer her, again worrying her lip with her teeth.

"So what has been your latest topic of conversation then?" Esme asked as innocently as possible, throwing caution to the wind in an effort to get to the bottom of things.

When Bella and Edward had made their appearance much earlier in the day than she'd anticipated, right away she'd known that something was off. Bella was nervous and fidgety while Edward seemed to be back to his old self—ever the meek and silent one. She had been so glad to see them when they had arrived, but it was hard for her to understand their sudden lack of enthusiasm. After waiting patiently throughout most of the morning for some answers to come her way she was now determined to uncover the source of all this tension.

"Umm…he told me about the mountain lions." She ventured quietly.

"That must have been a little bit of a shock I would imagine." Esme said softly, after a few moments spent considering what if anything that could have to do with the way they were now acting around one another.
It was indeed a topic that was usually off limits for Edward, so this would indicate that he was opening up to Bella in a way that he'd never done with anyone else.

"He felt like he should explain to me about why his hands are always cold." Bella again looked uncertain and very timid as she spoke.

"Bella," Esme left where she had been busy cleaning the counter space they'd used to prep their ingredients and went to her side. "Edward is a very complicated person. And I know that it probably doesn't mean much coming from me, since he's my son, but I think you will find that getting to really know him can be quite challenging. When you do however, you'll find that he has an awful lot to share—being so experienced and knowledgeable in many ways and yet so innocent in others."
Esme placed an arm around Bella's shoulders and gave her a bright smile. "He surprises me every time I talk to him and even more so when he's here, but it's always in a good way."

Esme knew that Bella had never been in a relationship because of her own choices, and she feared that the progression of whatever this was with her son had somehow frightened her into stepping away from what this could be. Likewise, Edward had almost no experience dealing with people, which left him ill-equipped to deal with any sort of unexpected reaction.

"I do look forward to knowing him better someday." Bella agreed with a weak smile, "but I think that I might need to learn a little more about myself first—if that makes sense."

"Perfect sense." His mother nodded. "In the meantime, I'll see if I can keep him coming around for the chocolate until you're ready."

She was satisfied for now. It would seem that it had been as she'd guessed, but all she could do was take comfort in the fact that at least Bella seemed to still have some desire to try.

Esme eventually excused herself to make a few phone calls while they were left waiting for the cake to finish baking, believing that perhaps Bella might appreciate a little time to herself. And indeed Bella had been struck by a sudden need to see Edward. She knew full well what Esme had been up to with her questions and subsequent words of encouragement, but she hadn't realized until now just how much she'd needed that.
She hadn't realized how much she needed to talk things out or how much she wanted someone to listen; and she knew that Edward was the one she needed in order to really accomplish that.

Without pausing to over think things she checked the time on the stove once more—this time to make sure the cake wouldn't be unattended for too long, and headed outside, determined to make things if not right at least a little better with Edward before she went off to try and make peace with her own issues.

She could still hear the music echoing from the garage as soon as she made it to the porch—only getting louder the closer she got to her destination.
When she stepped through the open door she winced at the overwhelming mix of sounds that greeted her. The blasting music attempted to cover the sounds of an air compressor that was busy mechanically refilling, while Edward stood with his back turned to her position operating some type of tool that made an equally awful buzzing sound as he ground away at the chunk of metal he had propped up on the workbench before him.

As luck would have it he'd set the tool aside about the time Bella had located the source of the music. Flipping the switch so that she might be able to gain his attention, she began to walk cautiously in his direction.
The silence was deafening now, such a drastic change from the combination of noises just before. And sure enough Edward had noticed, spinning around, a startled look in his eyes when he found Bella just behind him.

Much of him was covered in a rusty colored dust and he had grease on his hands, arms, his face in places—pretty much everywhere to be honest, but it didn't matter one bit to her. She reach for him immediately and wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head against his chest, looking to get as close to him as she could.

"I'm sorry, Edward. So, so sorry; and I don't care that I'm not supposed to say it because I feel awful for making you worry and for making the both of us miserable."
She felt his arms come around her, holding her to him tightly, the sound of his heartbeat being the only thing she could hear now.

"I've never been here before, and I'm terrified that I'll do something or say something to ruin what we might be able to have together." Bella continued to mumble, sagging against Edward, using his strength to keep her standing.
She had so much she wanted to say that the words weren't even making sense to her, but she knew that she wanted to try.

"There was this boy…some jerk I went to school with a long time ago…I didn't…but he…"

Edward pulled away ever so slightly and placed a finger under her chin, encouraging her to look at him. The action abruptly stopped her rushed flow of words. She was trembling within his embrace and Edward was concerned that she might be pushing herself too hard. She didn't have to do this yet.

"That's not me Bella. And it'll never be me." He assured her.
He pulled her back to him and went on to tell her, "When you're ready you tell me all about it…if you want to, and I promise that I'll be there to listen. Until then just tell me what it is you need from me and I'll be sure that you get it, okay."

She had appeared nothing short of frantic when he'd first looked into her eyes, but with each of his words he could feel that the anxiety and desperation was leaving her.

"Alice?" she asked softly after taking a few deep breaths to calm herself.

"Alice." He nodded.

They stood quietly holding one another for a time, but eventually Bella lifted her head from where it lay against his chest and giving him a shy little smile that showed some of her embarrassment over the way she'd managed to handle everything she said, "I missed this."

He knew that she was talking about them talking oddly enough and he smiled gently in agreement.

Just the sight of her reaching to embrace him had almost taken away every ounce of the frustration and disappointment that had been plaguing him—her words had done the rest.
He didn't have any answers to their problems yet and he doubted that he'd ever be able to figure things out without her help, but he was still overjoyed that she had come to him—that she was still willing to try.

"Would you want to call me while you're away?" he asked with a hopeful look in his eyes.

"We do have a lot that we should talk about." Bella conceded sadly.

"Well, since you're already covered in yuck thanks to that hug, how about give me a hand for a bit and we can go ahead and get started on some of that." He grinned while gently dusting off her shoulder only to embrace her once more, ultimately defeating the purpose.
He wanted to lighten the mood. He'd been suffering long enough and now that Bella seemed ready to talk he wanted nothing more than to move on to happier topics.

"What exactly do you think I can help you with?" Bella asked looking up at him with a surprised expression, "You do remember just how clumsy I can be, right?"

"You turned my music off, you can be my background noise." He teased.

"I can hardly compete with Metallica." She chuckled, his silliness beginning to lift her mood with ease.

The feel of her tiny body shaking with humor while still being held in his arms was amazing and he was so pleased to know that it was just that—an amazing feeling of contentment, hardly a sexual undertone to be found.

"No one can compete with you." He promised, her close proximity and his unexpected feeling of control bolstering his courage to speak freely.

"Not even chocolate cake?" she teased back, wanting to smile and laugh with him again more than anything.

"Technically chocolate cake isn't a person and therefore it can't be considered when speaking of this particular competition. No inanimate objects allowed." Edward corrected, successfully making her laugh once again.

"You're too damn smart for me, you know that?" Bella griped as if his comment had upset her.

Edward just shook his head and held her a little closer.

"I can play dumb with the best of 'em." He grinned, "and I'm totally willing to be whatever you need me to be—always remember that."

"Right now I need you to be my mechanic. If you do a good job there might be chocolate cake available for payment." She smiled.

"Well in that case you're gonna have to let me go so that I can get back to work." He playfully insisted.

"Just for a little while, okay." She blushed.

"I'll hurry, I promise." He beamed with satisfaction.