Villains

A/N: It's been awhile since I've updated, I know! I had extensive writer's block and standardizing testing is just pure evil. So, this chapter's about villain sies! Enjoy!

Ron, Harry, Ginny and Hermione are in their normal empty classroom, either studying or eating lunch. Ginny looks quite bored with herself.

"Ginny, what's wrong?" Hermione asks with a hint of concern in her voice.

"Why can't we start the lesson already?" Ginny whined.

"The lesson for today is..." Before Hermione could even finish, Ron turned off the lights, took out a Muggle flashlight (how he ever managed to obtain a flashlight, being a pureblood and all, will remain a mystery) and cackled:

"Villains!"

"Villains?" Harry, Hermione and Ginny asked curiously.

"Villains! They usually have a terribly tragic past, usually connected with You-Know-Who torturing and killing the person's parents. It actually affects them, sometimes causing them to want revenge on him, thus going on our side to help and defeat him, thinking it's revenge. She eventually wins, with little of Harry's help. She may even get tied up and gagged in You-Know-Who's 'lair' and possibly get tortured to get information out of her. Since she has powers that greater than a full grown witch or wizard, she does some unknown wandless magic to get herself free from the evil Dark Lord. "

"There is a second scenario with the villain or evil sue, usually the sue being either in fifth, sixth or seventh year in Hogwarts, depending on which year the author wants the story to be set in. She, for reasons not fully explained, is a Death Eater at fifteen/sixteen/seventeen years old, sent by You-Know-Who to find ways to defeat Harry once and for all."

"She is obviously a Slytherin and is friends with Draco and his goons, occasionally with Pansy Parkinson. Pansy isn't really present to be 'friends' as she's portrayed as an annoying, fawning slut. Over time, Sue and Harry fall in love and live happily ever after because Sue changes from the Dark side to the Light, and helps Harry, Hermione, Ginny and I to defeat You-Know-Who. Sue may or may not have a love triangle with Malfoy and Harry, depending on which actor the author loves more." Ron takes a deep breath after much explaining and relaxes off to the side.

Harry looks offended to think he would be willingly and happily paired with a Mary Sue. He shudders at the thought.

"Like many Mary Sues," Hermione adds, " they have long hair that cascades to their waist in perfect waves. It's described as being either 'raven black', 'dark as the night sky', 'black as soot' or something else just as poetically cliche. Her eyes are usually 'blue as the ocean', 'silver/violet flecked blue', 'blue, like uncried tears'. They can also be 'steely gray', 'stormy' or something else cliche or unusual."

"Her body is one of her few defining traits, besides being a Slytherin and possibly a Death Eater, she is skinny enough to be anorexic, but still 'has curves in all of the right places'. She is absolutely, stunningly beautiful to the point where it seems unhealthy."

"The Sue's name is the worst part of the whole story." Ginny adds, as Hermione breaths from ranting. "Her name, about nine out of ten times, is 'Raven' or any variation, which includes but not limited to: 'Reyvin', 'Raeven', 'Raivien', and so on. 'Darkness' and 'Shadow' may be incorporated as one of her names, as 'Coal' could be too. Since Evil!Sue is a pureblood, she might also be named after a constellation, 'Cassiopeia', 'Lyra' and 'Pyxis' being some examples. She also has many unique titles, like Lady Voldemort-" Ginny shudders at 'Voldemort' as does Ron. Harry and Hermione are unfazed.

"So, with that being said, this lesson is over! So long everybody, and don't forget to stay tuned for the next Mary Sue lesson!" Harry says enthusiastically as the room fades to black.

A/N: Yeah, short chapter, I know. At least I updated right?

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