wooo! it's been a while! so, how is everyone? did you all miss me? haha i'm sure you did... sarcasm? i really have NEVER heard of it enjoy!

Everywhere was commotion and loud noises. Pirates pirates everywhere. But what could possibly be better?!

Rick was running up ahead of Claire and Jack and narrowly avoiding swords and pirates.

Claire was looking everywhere but where she was going.

'This is so cool. I am actually witnessing the fight scene! I can't believe it! Cora is NEVER going to believe this.'

Jack pulled on ahead of her. Not because he was a guy and could run faster than her because girls are better than guys anyway, but because she was distracted and wanted to stay and watch.

-BAM!!!!-

She ran flat out into a pirate.

"OOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Gosh! Look where ye'r goin'!"

But the pirate was out cold and couldn't hear her anyways.

Claire got up and rubbed her forehead. It hurt a lot.

"Bloody pirates..."

She looked up to see where Jack and Rick were, but they were long gone.

"DAMNit!"

She knew that Jack and Rick wouldn't notice that she was gone until after they reached Will's. By then she would have been captured or stabbed or shot or...

"OOOO.K. Trying not to think of that. I'll just go to Elizabitch's house because if I stick with her than I can be sure to get back to Jack eventually. I'll just contact Rick and tell him what I'm doing." She stood there just talking to herself in the middle of all the confusion wearing clothes that didn't fit her. You can just imagine how strange this might look. "But he probably knows already. He's the one that brought me here because I'm so obsessed. He would be able to figure out that I got captured by pirates on purpose."

-GRUNT-

She looked to her right. A big ugly nasty pirate was standing over her with a knife.

"OOOH! Hello! I'm Claire! Nice to meet you. I've always wanted to meet a pirate!"

The pirate just looked confused and lowered the knife... slightly.

She was about to grab his hand and shake it when she got rucked from the side and went flying over.

-UGH!-

"What IS it with people running into me today! My GOD!"

She looked at the person who was now laying on her legs.

The person lifted his head. A gorgeous pair of eyes stared back at her. The cutest deep brown eyes, besides Jack's. They were like big round sad irresistable puppy dog eyes. When he looked at her with those eyes, she could just melt in them. She loved eyes because she could just see into a person's soul with them. Medium length, shaggy dirty blonde hair hung in his face. It looked messy and flipped out a little in the front. He looked about the same age as her. If she was not so preoccupied with plundering pirates and her 'involvement' with Captain Jack Sparrow, she would have been interested in him.

The boy stood up. He was fairly tall, taller than her anyway, and really thin. His skin was lightly bronzed and smooth. No gross acne to hide his georgeous face.

"Nice hit," Claire said, rubbing her bruising side. "You should play rugby, man."

"Sorry for that but I couldn't let you be attacked by that pirate." His voice was fairly deep.

"Uh, well thanks but I think I can handle my own afairs..." Claire put on a guilty face. "I just wanted to meet one in person, ye know?"

"Erhm, actually I don't know. Why would you ever want to meet a pirate? They're horrible vicious things that kill everything in sight."

Claire's mouth dropped open. "How can you say that?! Have you ever met one? You can't just judge a book by its cover ye know—"

The boy started pulling her into an alley.

"Hey! What are you doing. Get off me. RAPE!!!"

"You're worried about me raping you and yet, you were unconcerned about a pirate? Are you mad? And anyway who would really care with all this going on, hm? I'm just trying to get us out of this mess."

They went in the alley. It was very long and very dark. At least none of the pirates could find them there.

"Tell me: why did we come here again?"

"To apologize for tackling you and to explain myself."

"Well thank you. Now, may I know the name of my knight in shining armour?"

He rolled his eyes. "I'm Ryan. And," sarcastically, "what am I to call thee, fair maiden?"

"Pleasure, Ryan. I'm Claire."

"You're, erhm, not from around here are you?"

"No, but how'd you know that?"

He looked her up and down. Her clothes were like nothing he had ever seen before on a lady. She wore pants, almost like a man, that were too big for her. Pirate maybe? She wasn't vile enough to be considered a pirate, but not a proper lady for that matter either.

"Just a hunch. Where are you from?"

"North Carolina," she said almost bouncy-like. She was excited by all that was going on around her but nervous because she really needed to get to Elizabitch's.

"What?"

"Here, uh, Ryan. I have to go. It's been real nice talking to you."

She turned to leave but then realized how odd this situation was and how bad she would feel if she just left him there. He had never seen this movie and really didn't think that pirates were the shit. 'Aww... damnit.'

"Ye know what? OK. Ye know where the blacksmith shop is, don't ye?"

He nodded.

"OK. This is going to sound weird but go there and when you see Will, tell them Claire sent you and that you're going to come with us, savvy?"

"But—"

"EH! No questions. Just go!"

He turned and left. 'Good boy.'

So did Claire. She really needed to get to Elizabitch's house now before it was too late.

---

Jack and Rick ran all the way to the blacksmith shop.

They came in the door and—

-SMACK!-

Jack ran straight into Will who was leaving with his sword and ax to go help in the commotion.

"Ouch!" they both yelled.

"JINX!"

Jack and Will both look at Rick.

"What? I used to say it all the time when I was a kid. I haven't been able to since then and I thought—"

"Rick, just stop talking. What are you two doing here?" Will was caught completely off guard.

"Two?" Rick sounded really confused.

Jack stopped laughing and looked around. "Where's Claire!?!"

"It's alright Jack. She'll be OK. She really does know what to do. I promise."

"What's going on?" Will sounded like an impatient little kid.

Rick got to explaining the whole ordeal with Claire while Jack sat in the corner quietly.

After Rick finished there was an odd silence.

-door swings open with a BAM!-

A young boy came into the room.

"Why does everyone have to barge in here like that?" Will whined.

"Evening. I'm Ryan," Ryan said breathlessly. "I just ran all the way here. Claire sent me. Apparently, I'm coming with you? She told me so. But I have a question. Where are we going?"

"I don't know where you are going. I had jest planned on commandeering a ship and getting the bloody hell out of here," Jack said defiantly.

Will shrugged. "I was just going to be doing my job like usual."

Jack and Will both looked at Rick who was looking at the floor with a smirk on his face.

"Rick?" they both said accusingly.

"JINX!" Rick yelled.

"What??" Ryan said very confused.

"Rick what's going on?"

"I... I... I don't know."

"Yes, you do."

"NO I DON'T!"

"FINE! WHATEVER!" (men really do act like babies sometimes don't they?)

Ryan just stood there confused. "Erhm, O... K?"

Rick decided to make a suggestion. He had to or else they could be stuck here all night and the movie wouldn't be nearly as good. "Let's go fight icky pirates!"

"YEAH!" yelled Ryan and Will.

–Ahem... – coughed Jack.

"I mean, well what I really meant was—"

"Save it."

Will passed around swords for everyone that didn't have one already, which would be everyone but Jack and himself, which would be Rick and Ryan.

They all ran outside and started chopping at people.

But Jack had an idea.

"RICK!"

"Fighting! –chop chop– What?"

"Where'd ye say Claire was gonna be?"

–chop– "The govenor's house. OOPS! Oh shit. NO JACK!"

Jack took off towards the govenor's house. Unfortunately for him he had to pass by the Fort to get there first.

---

Norrington was standing at the top of Fort Charles with only a few men. The men were all anxious because of all that was going on, but Norrington was quite sure of himself. The govenor had fled to Norrington's office and barracaded himself in there, hopefully, because by George that's what he had told him to do. He better have done it or...

There was hardly anyone in the streets surrounding the Fort which was surprising. Most pirates came for the arms as well as fortunes. But so far no one had been there.

He thought too soon. Someone was running, armed it looked like and in a hurry, towards the Fort.

"Men! There's an easy target. No use in shooting at him, though. We'll just be waiting for him by the time he gets here."

They all went down to the front of the Fort. They weren't in plain sight, though. The commodore was smart and decided to hide behind the building and wait for the pirate to run past the front wall before they pounced.

-Waiting...waiting...waiting...waiting...FOOTSTEPS!-

"Get ready men," Norrington whispered.

-closer footsteps!-

-s'more closer footsteps!-

-EVEN CLOSER FOOTSTEPS!-

"AH HAH!" –nab–

Norrington grabbed the man and his men helped him wrestle him to the ground.

"Let go o' me!"

"Well, well, well. If it isn't our little Jack Sparrow."

"Bloody... WIGMAN!"

Norrington found a gag out of nowhere and stuffed it in Jack's mouth angrily.

He also adjusted his wig...

"I guess this shall be known as the day that Captain Jack Sparrow almost escaped. Take him away."

"Ymph wmph gmph mph wmph wph vmph!"

"So sorry, Mr. Sparrow. Would you mind repeating that?"

Jack gave the most spiteful look he could and aimed it directly at the center of Norrington's forehead.

One of Norrington's men rapped him over the head with something and he fell limp.

---

Claire was sprinting towards the lizard's house. Dodging pirates was harder to do now since it was nearing the time where the pirates would raid the govenor's house.

Finally, she reached the big oak doors. She turned around and leaned against them to catch her breath. She could already see the crowd of pirates coming to collect the medallion.

'Maaann... I really don't want to go through this with.. with .. her!'

But she pushed her way in the door anyways. As it turned out, Estrella was standing right there.

Claire knew that if she calmly explained what was happening that Estrella wouldn't believe it. So she had to use her mad acting skills.

(Out of breath sounding) "Pirates! (gasp) Coming! (breath) Must warn (another gasp) Miss Swann." (clutches chest looking like can't breathe)

The maid charged upstairs and Claire charged after her. She stopped at about the middle of the staircase because that was the best spot to see the pirates coming in.

Meanwhile, Estrella was fetching Elizabeth.

"Miss! A lady has run here and told me that there are pirates—"

-BANG-

Elizabeth and Estrella both ran out of her room and to the top of the staircase.

A butler was walking towards the door. They were trying to break in.

Elizabeth started running down the stairs.

Claire saw her and shouted to her. "Here, here! Best seat in the house."

Elizabeth gave her a weird look and shouted to the butler as he had his hand on the door handle. "DON'T!"

But he opened the door anyway.

There was the pirate gang.

Claire almost sang to herself she was so excited.

" 'ello chum."

-SHOOT-

Claire flinched and grimaced beside a shrieking Elizabeth.

"EW! It wasn't that gross in the movie!"

"Up there."

"GIRLS!"

Claire grabbed Elizabeth's arm and pulled her up the stairs. "This way please. Step lively."

"Excuse me! Who do you think you are, directing me in my own home?"

"Excuse me," Claire was mocking her, "you realize there's a gang of pirates chacing you-us-and you're worried about who I am? Sheesh... just shut up and come on."

They went into Elizabeth's room, closed the door, and ran into Estrella again.

"Miss Swann. They've come to kidnap you!"

"What?"

"You're the govenor's daughter."

'These people think they've got it all figured out don't they...'

"Being rich isn't everything, you know. They might want her for a reason other than the ice around her neck. Well... in this case I guess it is for what she's got around her neck."

Elizabeth gave Claire a look like 'how-do-you-know-what-I've-got-around-my-neck?' but seemed to get the message.

-BANG-

She turned to the maid again. "Quick hide. At the first chance you get, run to the fort."

Elizabeth ran behind another wall and Claire followed.

The pirates saw the edge of Claire's/Will's pants go behind the wall as they broke through the door and headed that way.

-WAMB-

Elizabeth hit the pirate in the face with the bed-heater-thing.

"I liked you, just so you know," Claire said respectfully.

The other pirate came, too, but grabbed the heater thing. He began taunting Elizabeth with it. Claire reached over and started tickling the pirate maddly in the stomach.

"AHHH! No! Stop, please!"

"Move!" Elizabeth yelled to Claire. She jumped back and Elizabeth pulled the handle and all the red hot coals fell on the pirate's head.

"OO! Ahh! It's hot! You burned me!"

"SORRY! C'mon!" Claire tugged Elizabeth out of the room and they began running down the stairs. Claire saw Estrella scream as she ran over the dead butler infront of the door.

The pirates followed them. One of them had almost caught up with them and they were about to reach the bottom of the stair case when the other, jumped the railing and landed in front of them.

"It's the one with the wooden eye! YEAH! I've always wanted to meet you. So what's you're name? Ragetti, right?"

But he didn't answer her. He had to turn around and stare stupidly like everyone else at the cannon ball that ran into another pirate halfway across the room even though noone else could have even seen the cannon ball coming and so therefore had no reason to turn and stare.

Anyway, the chandelier fell and separated the two pirates from the two ladies.

Elizabeth felt smart so she took a candle holder and put it over the door handles. Psht. Like that would stop them. Elizabeth's stuff was cheap anyways, seeing that Will broke a different candle holder by just touching it earlier.

But then she felt even smarter and decided to take the plaqued crossed swords off the wall. Claire didn't know what she would have done with it anyways. Elizabeth was such a girl.

The swords didn't come out of the stupid plaque so they had to hide. Or rather, the lizard hid and left Claire to fend for herself.

Claire saw the pirates come in from under the table, where she was hiding.

Elizabeth was such a little brat, leaving Claire to find her own hiding spot when she knew there was enough room in the closet. Under the table was such a bad hiding spot that the pirates found her instantly.

"Stupid Govenor's daughter, miss priss, Miss I-think-I-already-run-Port-Royal!"

"SHUT UP!" the pirate with bright yellow eyes shouted at her.

"I'LL SHUT UP WHEN I WANT TO SHUT UP!"

He pointed a pistol in her face.

Claire just laughed. "PARLEY! NYE!!!!!!! You can't hurt me, na na na na na na!" She blew a raspberry at them.

"Blaizes wit' the code."

"I WANT TO BE TAKEN TO YOUR CAPTAIN! And I'll go wit'out a fuss. Oh yeah and before I forget, Elizabeth is hiding in that closet with your medallion."

"Stupid wench! Why did you tell them?" Elizabeth came storming out of the closet.

The pirate that had yelled at Claire pointed the gun in her face, too.

"Give me that medallion, or—"

"Parley."

"URGH! I'm just tryin' ta do me duty like a good little pirate and two wenches come along and spoil it all."

"It's OK. I know what you mean... hey! TWO wenches?! I was just helpin' you out!"

The pirate looked at Claire in disgust. "Let's go. Both o' ya!"

---

Will, Ryan, Rick, and icky pirates were all fighting each other. Actually, Ryan, Will, and Rick were fighting the icky pirates. Will had just stabbed one of them when he saw Elizabeth and Claire being dragged along by two pirates.

"Elizabeth! Claire?"

"Will!" Elizabeth whispered.

"Will!" Claire said in a 'yes-I'm-making-fun-of-you' voice and reached out her hand towards Will dramatically before waving a giggly good-bye.

'Something's up,' Will thought. 'She's got that look in her eye that she gets whenever something's up. And it's not usually good. How did this all get so messed up?'