Children, children welcome back!

Thank you's for reviewing on the last chapter: Edward's-a-beefcake, HisInnocentDarkAngel, InkStainedFire, shaz308, skydala and vampgurl15.

This chapter is dedicated to Edward's-a-beefcake for having a very perceptive eye and calling a few things before they happened. Hope it answers your questions.

Disclaimer: Not mine.

Explanations

I couldn't move. I was shocked to my core.

We were safe. Every time. I mean, I know condoms are only effective 97% of the time, but still, what are the odds?

She was pregnant? She was having my child? I was getting a chance to be a Father again?

Because there was absolutely no doubt in my mind that the child she was carrying was mine.

I thawed out. A bigger grin than I ever thought possible for the human body to experience broke through me.

She was pregnant! She was having my child! I was getting a chance to be a Father again!

Right now, right at this very moment I gave a million thanks for Dr. Collins abusing his power. He brought us together again and consequently gave me everything I'd ever hoped for. Everything I thought I'd lost forever two and a half years ago.

I went to give her a bone crushing hug and a hysterical laughter broke through my chest. I was drugged on happiness. My fears were forgotten and my heart warmed. I went to look at her face, she was still sobbing. She must have thought I would get mad at her for not telling me. I wouldn't, nothing could burst my bubble right now. I stripped of every other feeling I possessed to focus solely on the high I felt.

"Bella." I managed between my grin.

She looked at me with puffy, tear-stricken eyes. I couldn't help myself; I needed her now more than ever. I took off her oxygen mask and went to crush her lips with mine pouring all the relief I felt at her being unhurt and the incredible nirvana- rivaling reaction I had to the news. I let those feelings take over me. I was so appreciative, so thankful that a few seconds later I started sobbing with tears of happiness, of relief and of immense gratefulness.

My sobs took over and I couldn't kiss her anymore. I went to hug her again, trying to take away her sadness with my happiness.

"Bella, love. I- I'm…" I couldn't get anything else over the lump in my throat. I held her tighter, still remembering to be careful of her precious cargo.

There was a noise in front of me and I looked up to see the same guy I wanted to punch before for being so callous but suddenly actually wanted to high five for giving me the best news of my life enter the room with an ultrasound machine in tow.

"Well aren't we the happy ones?" Maybe just a little punch to get him off the cheesy lines? "Now Miss Swan, I'm just going to hook this up and then we'll see your baby." He went to do that.

"Baby." Just the word gave me a bigger rush than I'd ever experienced. My smile increased in size. My cheeks would hurt tomorrow but I couldn't give a fuck about that right now.

"Now sir, I'm going to need you to let go of her so she can lie down, and if you can lift your shirt up Miss Swan, we can start."

I let go of her shoulders but held her hand captive. I would make it my mission in life never to be parted from her again. She still had tears rolling down her cheeks but she wasn't sobbing anymore. She went to lift her shirt up with a shaky hand and right then I could've died a happy man. She had a bulge, it was small for the 14 weeks along I knew she was, just slightly noticeable with no obstructions and would definitely go unnoticed with loose clothing. It was a tiny, little bump where my tiny, little baby was growing. I started believing in miracles in that moment. I felt like I had found Heaven on Earth.

The technician took me out of my reverie. "This'll be cold" he warned her as he applied the ultrasound gel, followed shortly by the Doppler stick. The first time she left I had thrown myself into my work so I went and got an Associates as an Ultrasound Technician in my spare time. I was immensely glad of that choice now. When the time came, I would be able to tell my baby's gender.

A heartbeat as fast as a hummingbird's wings filled the silence of the room. I went to look at Bella; she closed her eyes, making two more tears fall from her eyes. She was biting her lip and her expression wasn't one of awe, as I was sure mine was, but of relief. She must've been worried about the baby's welfare. Why didn't I think of that before? I took my hand and wiped her tears away. Almost involuntarily she cupped into it and her grip on my hand tightened a little. I fell even more in love with her in that moment. Hearing our baby's heartbeat together for the first time. I focused my eyes on the screen and after a few minutes the technician finally settled on an image.

And there it was: my tiny, little miracle. It was so small Bella's almost non-existent bump seemed too big for it. But it was there, growing and living. It looked a little like a gummy bear, but I knew once it came out it would break hearts with its beauty. Starting with mine.

"Bella, love, look. It's our baby." Her eyes opened and she went to look at the screen. I placed a kiss on her temple.

"Well, it looks like your good luck Miss Swan has been inherited by your baby. All seems well. Would you like a picture?" We both nodded.

He spent a few more minutes checking to make sure everything was indeed fine and then finally went to print out the picture. He handed it to Bella, who let go of my hand and went to run a finger tenderly over it. Her eyes pooled with tears again- only- now she started smiling for the first time since I'd been here.

"Miss Swan, we'd like to keep you overnight, just to make sure. But tomorrow morning you'll be free to go home again." The technician said.

"My apartment burned down." She said in a small voice.

"Your apartment may have burned down Bella, but your home has always been with me." I smiled at her again and went to take the picture carefully from her hand. I was meeting my baby for the first time.

As soon as she had fallen asleep I went out to get my car back. I would need it to get us back home. I smiled at that thought.

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She had remained quiet while being discharged. And once in the car, she had fallen asleep again almost immediately. She must've been so tired, pregnancy already does that to you but adding her ordeal and worry I was shocked she had even woken up at all.

I opened the door to our home and held it open for her.

"Are you hungry, love? Do you want me to make you anything? Or we can go out if you want."

"I'm just going to go to bed. I'm still tired." She turned around and headed for the guest bedroom. I stopped her and veered her in the right direction. To our room. She didn't fight it.

A question had been running through my mind and I decided to ask it. "Bella? Why didn't you tell me before? Were you trying to hide this from me or something?" I asked with a little laugh.

She stepped away from my embrace and her head went to look down. "Yes." She said in a weak, little whisper that felt like a cannonball to my chest. I was hurt and angry by her answer, but the anger took over.

"What? Bella, please tell me you're joking." I practically snarled.

"I didn't want you to know, Edward." Her voice was cracking but my anger wasn't moved.

"Why the hell not?" I was getting angrier by the second.

"I was afraid."

"Of what?"

She was fully sobbing now. "A repeat of last time."

I felt my anger leave me, along with everything else I'd felt in the last 12 hours. I kept nothing, I wasn't happy or terrified or indignant. I was just drained.

That's why she didn't tell me? Because of what happened last time? I felt little tingles of anger come back. That wasn't fair. Last time was an accident, I didn't mean for it to happen. I thought she knew that, but no, she kept me in the dark because she was afraid I'd do the same thing again. Suddenly I was furious.

"Were you that afraid this one would get killed too?" My voice was dripping with sarcasm and I was seeing red.

Her head snapped up and her hand connected with my cheek with more force than I'd ever known her capable of.

"You are such an asshole, Edward. Do you have any idea how long I've tried to put that past me? To come to terms with what happened? Do you know how hard it was for me when I realized what I'd done? Do you know how badly I wanted to die when I found out I'd killed our baby?" She started crying hard.

I blinked, but my confusion stayed in place. "Bella, what-"

"No, no you don't. Because you weren't there. I know you blamed me and I understood that, but you have absolutely no right to talk about the darkest time of my life as if you were talking about a shopping trip. I know it was my fault that the baby died, Edward. But I never meant for that to happen, it was an accident and every day I ask for forgiveness for it. You don't know how hard it was, Edward. In a matter of seconds I managed to lose the two most important things in my life, all because of a stupid mistake." She was shaking and crying so hard she was almost hyperventilating.

I still didn't understand. "What are you talking about? What mistake did you make?" I was fully aware of mine, but I could not for the life of me think of hers.

"I wasn't wearing a seat-belt." She croaked almost unintelligibly. She was right, I remembered that, but I never faulted her for it, it was unlucky, yes, but it was not the catalyst to our baby's death. My veering the car was. Still, that was very unlike her. She always wore her seatbelt. Even if we went just two blocks. She was the daughter of the Chief of Police!

She was obviously very affected by this, so how could I ask her why she wasn't wearing her seatbelt in a tactful manner?

"Why not?" I asked in an almost scared voice.

She inhaled deeply before answering in a rough voice. "You fell asleep, Edward. I don't think you even realize that, because it happened the second your head touched the seat, but you did. I took a test days before but I had just verified the pregnancy that afternoon, everything was already set to celebrate your residency so I decided to wait until the next morning to tell you. I had a onesie made with "Baby Cullen" in the front. It was so beautiful." She started crying again. "I was going to surprise you, I was going to tell you to get me something from the guest bedroom where in the bed you'd find the onesie and a positive pregnancy test. I had it all planned.

"But then you fell asleep and I couldn't wait anymore. I had everything I needed with me in that car and I couldn't have been happier. I took your hand, careful not to wake you and I placed it on my stomach, only it wasn't enough, so I put your hand back and I took off my seat-belt so the baby could really feel you. I lifted my shirt and I put you hand over me again, and I put mine over yours and I felt whole. Our baby was greeting its parents. I was introducing you and I had never in my life felt more complete. But then you started stirring so I returned your hand again, I didn't want the surprise to be spoiled. And then everything happened so quickly I didn't get a chance to put the seat-belt back on. And I was going so fast I couldn't avoid crashing, even if I had tried, but I was so scared for us. I was going to kill us. So I did the only thing I thought of to do, I folded my arms over the baby in an attempt to save it but I failed, I failed and I'm so sorry, Edward. I'm so sorry my impatience killed our baby. I'm so sorry I couldn't protect it. I'm so sorry I was so stupid, I should have waited, I shouldn't have taken off the seat-belt, maybe then, maybe then the baby would've been fine. I'm so sorry, Edward." She was on her knees now rocking back and forth in an attempt to calm down.

She blamed herself.

I remembered the hospital conversation we had had after she found out the baby had died to find any incongruence in her statement. To prove that she had blamed me as she should have, but I couldn't find one.

Yes, she was upset with me for lying to her but she had never, not once blamed me. I just always figured she would have. The only time she yelled was when I apologized for the accident, when I had taken full responsibility for it.

"You don't get to be sorry, Edward. I won't let you."

I took it the wrong way, she never meant she wouldn't let me forget my mistake, she meant she wouldn't let me carry a burden that she thought was hers.

And then I left stating that the blame and guilt would be too much, that we could never get past them and her misassumptions were founded. I left her more broken than I had ever realized. I left her thinking that I blamed her too. That I would never forgive her. I left without giving her a chance to talk things through, without hearing what she had to say for fear that the longer I stayed the worse it would be for her. I left her to herself to deal with her shame and her pain. I just went away.

I had killed her too.

I had never in my life felt more miserable. I was such a scum. I broke her more than I ever knew and I made her think she deserved it.

I fell to my knees too and hesitantly went to hug her. She was so absorbed in her crying she didn't even flinch away from me. I closed my arms around her and she sobbed into my shoulder. I bit my lip but the tears flowed freely down my face.

"Bella, I- I didn't know that was how you felt. I always thought you'd blame me. I was the one who caused the accident. Not you."

"But I was the one who couldn't avoid it. I was the one who was going too fast and couldn't regain control." She sounded so pained, so exposed. "I was the one who wasn't enough for the baby. I was the one who lost it."

"Bella…" I didn't know what to do, what to say, how to heal her.

"And then I saw you again. And I missed you so much, Edward. I missed you every single hour of every single day we spent apart. And I wanted to be with you again but I knew I shouldn't. You were probably happy and my reappearance would only disturb your life. It would only bring back terrible memories; I didn't want you to hate me further. So I tried, I swear to you I tried my hardest to stay away from you, but it was so hard, every day I would see you, I would have you at arm's length and I needed you so much. But I had to respect your relationship, I wanted you to be happy, even if it wasn't with me. I hurt you so much I couldn't begrudge you for trying to make a new life. But then you kissed me and my resolve went out the window, I was with you once more and I would never leave you again. We would heal together, like we should have in the beginning.

"But then I found out about your plans and I knew I couldn't stand in your way. And it hurt me so, so much to leave again, Edward. My life was void of meaning again. I had just found you and then I had to give you up. But I did it because I wanted you to be happy again, even if it was with someone else. I love you enough to give you up if that's what's best, Edward. Even if I die in the process. You had a whole other life set up and I couldn't be the reason you didn't get it. Which is why when I found out about this baby I didn't tell you. I never wanted you to find out because then it would only break my heart further every time I saw you happy with your girlfriend." She had regained a little of her composure while speaking.

"What?" To say I was confused would be an understatement. "What are you talking about? What plans? And what girlfriend? I told you I didn't have a girlfriend." How many times would I have to tell her that? I thought she'd believed me.

"You're right. 'Fiancée' would be a much more appropriate label." She started crying again. Had she hit her head? Where on earth would she get those ideas?

"Bella, I told you that night I didn't have a girlfriend. I thought you believed me."

"I did."

"So what changed?"

"I found the ring."

"What ring?"

"The one on your bottom drawer." Her voice was cracking again. How much had she cried in the last day? She would run out of tears. "Since you were at the hospital that night, I decided to wear your old shirts like I used to. And there it was, right in the middle. And I fell apart again. I understood then: You had moved on and I was only going to hurt you in the end. But I felt so stupid for not seeing it before. Why else would you never call me, other than the blame, I mean? Why else would you never talk to me when we were alone? Why wouldn't you tell your family I was staying here? Why else would you wait until I literally had one foot out the door to come close to me? Why else would you have condoms in your night table? But I didn't care, in that second your kiss was enough, I gave in. I went to the hospital to talk to you but I saw you comforting a girl who was crying, and then you smiled and went after her and I knew you really had moved on. So I left in order for you to keep going with your plans. I wrote you a letter that said just that, that you could forget we ever made love again because you were about to get engaged. Because you were already happy and I didn't want to complicate your life. And then I found out I was pregnant and I haven't stopped worrying, like you said I am afraid this one will get killed too. I'm afraid I'll do it." She wasn't crying anymore but she looked much more pained than with a face full of tears.

How many mistakes and misconceptions had we fallen victims of for not talking to each other? It was incredible the amount of miscommunication between us. And the amount of stupidity too. If only I'd read the whole letter I would've known to go after her and set everything straight. But no, I ripped it to pieces and threw it in the garbage without reading it all. I just, once again, assumed what it would say and I was so far off the mark I couldn't blame her for keeping the baby a secret from me. Who in the world would tell me the truth when so much erroneous evidence pointed to my lies?

I didn't understand one thing, though. Why would she say I never called her and why would she tell me about the onesie again when I told her I kept it? Why would she think the ring was someone else's if I told her it was hers?

"Bella, a month after you left the first time, did you get my call? Did you ever hear my message?"

She was confused. "No, my phone broke in the accident. And when I was able to walk around on my own again I went and changed my number. We were sharing a plan, and you can't share a plan with someone who has just broken up with you. Why? What did it say?"

She didn't know. She never heard the message so there was no way for her to know that the ring was hers. That I was proposing to her that night.

I started laughing; I didn't know what else to do. How much bad luck can two people have? She left so I could go on with my botched plans of proposing to her two years prior?

My laughter increased.

"Why are you laughing, Edward? I don't find any of what I've told you even remotely funny." She was close to crying again.

I hurried to explain myself. "No, no Bella. I'm not laughing at anything you said. Of course not. It's just, well it's ironic that you left because of a ring that was destine-"

There was knock on the door. I didn't want to get it but I had to pull myself together, she'd gone through even more than I had, she was still suffering incredibly, she wasn't even enjoying this pregnancy like I was, she was terrified of making another mistake.

I opened the door to find Casey on the other side. The smile on my face froze.

"Hey, Edward." She came in and gave me a hug. "I just came to give you these; you left my apartment so suddenly after we were done yesterday that you forgot them."

In her hands were my phone, my wallet and the shirt I had changed out of in order not to get it dirty or sweat on it while helping her move.

My eyes focused on Bella and the expression on her face made my heart break once again.

That was so hard, poor Bella, we never thought about her pain.

I'll tell you a little story. I love rubber ducks (check picture on profile) and I love Harry Potter, in fact I love Harry Potter so much my sister's boyfriend calls me Dumbledork (you can laugh, it's funny), so my sister bought me this cute little stuffed duck and I was looking for a name for it and she goes "Oh, it already has a name. My boyfriend named it." And I'm like "What is it?" And she goes "Dumbleduck".

So, do it for Dumbleduck? Leave a review to make him happy?

Next chapter should be up by tomorrow. Have a great day.