Part Two
P.S: Sorry for having it out later than I originally said.
No wonder Hisagi likes her.
We arrived at the town central where most of the activity was being held. It was not dark enough to set out the lanterns since the sun was still lowering in the distance. I walked behind Rangiku keeping my eyes focused on the pebble walk way. Never before had I worn so much makeup and clothes. I felt uncomfortable and the sensation of throwing was beginning to build up in my stomach.
"Where are they?"
The strawberry blonde placed her hand on her hip, before spotting the guys. Renji stood, leaning against a watermelon stand, in a white yukata with pink petals across the bottom. Izuru stood in front of him, with a black yukata covered in white and golden birds. Ayasegawa's was the most extravagant and flashy of them all and was a plum color with light purple large flowers. Ikkaku's was simple, to be expected, and didn't even appear to be a traditional yukata. It was a dull green color with a zanpakuto to match hanging at his waist.
Last but not least, was the hyper active pink haired girl from before, who was hanging off Ikkaku's back. I was unaware that so many shinigami took part in this holiday. I wondered how they had got off of work.
I used Matsumoto as a shield, and peaked from behind her. It was inevitable that they would see me, but I could not help but hide.
Renji waved at us.
"Hey," He said.
"About time. What the hell took you so long?" Ikkaku said irritated.
"Beauty takes time." Rangiku countered.
Ikkaku shut his mouth, before looking around and opening it again.
"Where's Ayame?"
She cocked her head to the side.
"What are you talking about?"
He folded his arms over his chest and looked away. Yumichika held his hands and laughed lightly.
"He's been asking about her all day." Yumichika's voice fluttered jokingly.
Ikkaku face reddened faintly and he shoved his hands into his pockets and looked in the opposite direction.
"Che," He grumbled.
"You were asking baldy." The pink haired girl confirmed nodding as she did so.
"No one asked you!" He growled at the girl behind him.
I slithered out from behind Matsumoto.
"Ayame's right here." She pointed at me.
Shock was the easiest word to describe their facial expressions and reactions. All but Ayasegawa, seemed to respond in a thoroughly astonished behavior. Matsumoto giggled to at their dramatic reaction.
My eyes darted from right to left, embarrassed by the gawks.
"Ayame is that you?" Renji asked dumbly.
"Of course it's her you idiot. Stop acting stupid." She slapped Renji across his head. He rubbed his head.
"But, you look so…different."
"Pasty-chan!" Yachiru greeted upon recognizing me.
Pasty-chan? Was that the nick name I was supposed to live with? Was that the best she could come up with?
"Of course she does. Thanks to my help that is." Yumichika commented obviously taking great pride in what he deemed his 'piece of work'.
I smiled a bit nervously.
"We should get going." Izuru suggested.
As we walked, I migrated to the back of the group where Ikkaku and Yumichika were standing. I sighed. Maybe I should say something, I thought. We had been training together for a while but I had not had the chance to see them since working with Hisagi.
Suddenly, I was reminded of the conversation I had had with the Lieutenant yesterday. It was juvenile how satisfied I had been when he told me how he thought I was a good shinigami. I was also reminded of the regret of not personally asking him about the fireworks festival. It was too late for that now though.
He probably won't come, so I should just stop thinking about it, I told myself.
But it would be nice if he did.
"I-I'm excited to see the lights." I greeted out loud in an attempt to make things seem a tad more casual. However, the sentence came out more forced than I would have liked it to.
Ikkaku did not look at me but he grumbled a 'hm' in response. I could only guess that that was his way of agreeing.
"Hm, you've been awfully quiet Ikkaku. This quite new for you." Yumichika teased while nudging his bald fellow shinigami in his side.
"Shut the hell up." He grunted.
Why was he acting that way?
Maybe it's because I look completely stupid in this yukata. I groaned. Why did I even get out of bed this morning? The subconscious feeling that everyone was judging you as you walked by was too much for me to handle.
It was difficult to blend in. My kimono was mint green and my hair had been pulled away from my forehead. I felt naked. Not as naked as I felt when Rangiku had nearly assaulted me this morning but pretty darn close to it. I also felt vulnerable. And I could not find encouraging thoughts to make me feel better about helplessness.
We walked deeper into the city streets. There were booths and shacks lined up across each side selling a variety of festive items.
I sighed with content. Calming a bit as the crowds got larger. I was not a fan of crowded places but at least in bigger crowds it was more complex to be singled out. I remembered when my father had taken me to the festival. I did not recall anything that stood out besides the smell of good food, flashing lights, and awe.
Yachiru gasped and awed at the sight of the ostentatious colors. She was quite cute despite her high rank and her threatening ability to probably snap my neck in half if she wanted to. Still cute, nonetheless.
"Pineapple head, I'm hungry." She tugged Lieutenant Abarai's sleeve.
He focused his attention on the girl hanging from his arm.
"Get me some food." She pointed excitedly at a booth nearby.
He sighed.
Rangiku's smiled and her beauty mark crimpled at the corner of her lip. Her voice unexpectedly oozed with sweetness.
"And get me something too Renji, a girl like me shouldn't walk around famished."
"Didn't any of you bring your own money?" He asked.
Rangiku clutched onto his other arm and put on her signature pout.
"Come on Renji. For me?"
"Fine, but just this one time."
They celebrated their victory and happily skipped over to one of the sweets booth.
I gazed at the stand full of candies and sweets I had never even seen before.
"You want something?"
The question had come out of the blue. I turned to realize Ikkaku had asked. His face was serious.
"Oh, um, I'm fine." I really was. And I could not have the guilt of making him buy something for me.
"Why didn't you offer me anything?" Yumichika asked.
Ikkaku ignored his comment.
"I want this one." Stated Yachiru.
"Do you even know what that i-"
"I said I want this one." She ordered.
The salesman handed them their food while Renji in exchange, hesitantly handed him money for the overly priced food.
Yachiru danced around with her Mitarashi dango, four little balls of dough stuck on a stick with sweet sauce covering them. She waved it around in the air with joy. Matsumoto held her food of choice in a carton. I peaked inside.
"What is it?" I asked meekly.
"It's chocolate covered squid with mayonnaise sauce. Want to try one?"
I shook my head.
"Your loss," She waved the stick in my face before placing it into her mouth. The sauce dribbled down her chin and onto her breast. I caught Izuru and Renji staring out of the corners of their eyes.
"Oops." Rangiku said innocently.
There were so many children around. So much laughing and so many couples holding hands. The festival had a romantic air to it.
I speculated the possibility of Hisagi arriving. For some reason, I felt disappointed, even though I found the result inevitable. He had to work today.
Yet still, I hoped.
A line of children with masks pushed their way past us.
"Ah!" Matsumoto called out.
"What happened?" The guys asked in unison. I bumped into her back, unaware that she had stopped in the middle of the road.
"Goldfish scooping." She said in wonder.
Yachiru's face lit up.
"Goldfish scooping?" She gasped.
"Not again." Renji sighed.
They made their way to the goldfish booth pushing aside what ever poor pre pubescent young soul in who stood their way. We followed.
Games were always popular at festivals, so it was only customary that we played one, I assumed.
"What's the point of playing, you're just going to neglect it like last time."
Yumichika stated a matter-of-factly.
"That's not true. Now someone give me some money." Matsumoto objected.
I eyed the large tub of water. Inside were a school of bright orange goldfish glimmering as they darted and moved through the shallow water. Kids stared at them wide eyed and snot nosed.
"May I have two bowls please?" Matsumoto asked the old man overlooking the game.
He handed her two nets and bowls which she gave one of each to an excited Yachiru. The pink haired girl jittered around before kneeling beside the tub.
I turned to Yumichika. "Are you going to play?"
"And risk getting water splashed on my hair? I'll pass." The black haired shinigami held up his hand in a disgust at the childish game.
"Okay," I watched, unfamiliar with how the game was played.
Matsumoto and Yachiru coupled with the other participants stared at the water attentively, waiting for the right moment to catch their fish, I suppose. Unable to take the stillness of the moment Yachiru lunged into the water hands flailing. She splashed water and goldfish into the concentrated faces of Renji and Izuru who sat were kneeling beside her. They coughed.
"Come back here fish!" The fish fluttered away from her outstretched hands.
"You can't go in like that. You'll scare all the damn fish away." Ikkaku advised.
She stuck out her bottom lip and crossed her wet arms over her chest.
"I know!" An idea had landed in her brain.
She took out her zanpakuto and lifted it above the tub. Everyone moved back from the unexpected unsheathing of the weapon.
"I'll just catch the fish using-"
"No!" We all yelled in unison.
She looked disappointed and released an aaw.
Matsumoto giggled.
"Silly boys, it's all about grace. You have to be gentle and delicate, like I." the strawberry blonde placed her net in the water only to have it break abruptly.
"Delicate you say?" Yumichika snickered.
"Shut up Yumichika. I need another net. This one was poorly made!" She pouted, waving her broken net in the air.
They all seemed to not be having much luck in the game. It appears that it was a lot more difficult than it appeared.
"Hey old lady, I want a turn."
"Don't you see I'm busy?" She snapped at the young child. Matsumoto seemed to be getting a little testy and I made a mental note not to approach her when she's concentrating. He stuck his tongue out at her but she didn't notice due to her interest in the game.
Yachiru walked up to me, shoving her net and bowl into my hands.
"I don't want to play anymore. You have it, Pasty-chan." She shoved the items back into my hands.
"B-but I don't..." It couldn't hurt to try. I kneeled beside Izuru and observed the tube of fish.
I sat next to the tub of fish, unsure of what to do.
So all I have to do is catch a fish without breaking the net? That shouldn't be too hard, I assured myself. I singled out one fish in particular. It was a pretty golden orange color. I slipped in my net and gently but swiftly raised the flopping fish out of the water. It flopped sloppily into my fish bowl.
"Ah, you make it seem so easy." Renji said in marvel.
"Wow!" Yachiru added peering over my shoulder with her big red eyes.
"How did you do that, and on your first try?" Rangiku added.
I blushed."Well, I was just lucky, I mean, y-you just have to be gentle is all."
"See how many you can catch until the net breaks." One kid asked.
"Okay..."
I looked back into the tub and put my net back into the water. Then quickly I lifted another fish into the bowl.
"Amazing," Someone whispered. Was it really that big of a deal, I wondered.
"I give up." Rangiku concluded and put her things onto the floor. She got up from her spot and moved behind me. If I had not been so involved in the game I would have noticed that she had convinced everyone except for Izuru to follow her to some unknown destination. Izuru watched on, oblivious to the sudden lack of company.
Within five minutes I had successfully caught ten goldfish before breaking my net, which apparently had broken the booth's record. I had even acquired a small crowd mostly composed of small children and a few adults. They clapped and I was given a cute little sakura blossom pin to put in my bun.
"So, do you want these in bags?" Asked the man gruffly.
"You mean, I get too keep the goldfish?"
"You won 'em didn't you."
I looked at the small fish as the flittered around the bowl.
"Can I just take one?" I held up one finger. He shrugged in indifference.
"Fine by me."
I walked from the booth with my new companion in hand. But to my surprise, I only say Izuru standing off by himself.
I searched the pathway for a sign of another familiar figure. None could be found.
"Have you seen Rangiku and everyone else?" I tried standing on my tiptoes to look over the heads of the other pedestrians.
He shook his head.
"She said she was coming back..." He said uncertainly.
That Rangiku! She probably ditched us on purpose. Curses.
"Oh, well, I'm sure we can find them again." I said holding my new goldfish in my sleeve.
We walked along the pathway. The moon had set and it was beginning to get dark. The fireworks would be starting soon.
I felt awkward walking alone next to Izuru. I really didn't know him that well. His surprisingly deep voice cut through the quiet between us.
"So, are you enjoying yourself?" His voice wavered but was calm at the same time. His question sounded as if he was unsure to even ask.
"Y-yeah, um, are you?"
He nodded.
Izuru was an interesting person. He had changed considerably so since graduating from the Academy though. Once he had been so mischievous and cheerful, now he looked so…sad. He obviously was not in this state of emotion all the time. He had his share of jokes here and there, but still.
"You look...nice," He tried to compliment me.
I blushed. I waved my hands furiously in the air but was unable to say anything audible.
"Thanks," I finally told him.
"Your yukata thing looks cool too."
"Ah, thanks"
I sighed. Where was Matsumoto?
It was silent for the rest of our walk. I mentally cursed Matsumoto and her efforts at playing match maker.
It will be impossible to find them in this mass of people and it was getting increasingly darker by the moment.
"I think I sense them a ways off here." Izuru spoke up.
Out in the distance and shrouded by darkness, a figure waved at us.
My stomach gurgled and a pain shot through my abdomen. It clenched and writhed inside my gut. I winced at the uncomfortable sensation.
He began walking but stopped once he realized that I was not following him.
"Are you coming?"
"Oh, um, I'm just going to get a snack first."
"Are you sure Ayame?"
I nodded. My stomach growled in a predatory like manner.
He was hesitant to leave me by myself.
"Well, if you say so..."
I watched him walk off towards the group who sat on a hill near the river bank. Everyone seemed to be preparing for the fireworks. Families had their blankets spread out picnic style and children were beginning to calm down.
I was happy that Matsumoto had brought me here. She was too nice to me.
I went to the nearest stand. The smell radiating from the freshly baked pastries filled my nostrils and forced my stomach to react with a series of convulsions. I pointed to the first thing I could see.
"May I have this cake, please?" I asked eagerly.
I spent the last of my pocket money. Not that I had brought a lot, only enough to get a snack. Unknowingly, I had not taken into account that prices were always higher at events like these. That did not matter now, as long as I had something to eat, I thought.
It smelled delicious, and my mouth watered at the fresh warm pastry in my hand. I tied my goldfish bag to my waist.
As I was about to eat the cake slice I noticed the eyes of a little girl staring at me. I stopped myself from taking a bite of the cake and looked back at her. The girl stood, almost out of place, amongst the yukata clad children. Had I offended her? She licked her chapped lips. Her face was dirty and her mane was a bit disheveled. She looked alone.
She continued her intent look but now it was directed at the food in my hands. My stomach growled in competition with my brain and heart. I turned away from her longing gaze in an attempt to block it from my view. Then I stared at the cake. Sweets did not taste as well when mixed with guilt, my conscious told me. The voice in my head seemed to resemble that of my mother's own critical voice. I looked over my shoulder at the girl who still standing there.
Then I walked over to her.
"Um, do you want this?" I asked quietly. I slowly handed out the cake. My stomach rumbled louder in protest.
She shrunk away.
"You can have it, if you want. Here, I wasn't hungry anyways." I placed the cake in her hands. Her brown eyes became wet and wild with emotion. Then she dashed quickly down the street. My stomach growled again disillusioned with its loss, but I hushed it. Then I walked down the street.
I wonder where Matsumoto and the guys were. The grass by the bank side was filled with groups of people sitting together. I thought it best to not try to step over them. Maybe I'll go around, I decided.
I took a route through the woods along the river. The trees kept much of the moonlight from spilling through. The white light that did reach the ground formed different shapes made by the treetops. The farther I went along the river side the more the noise from the crowd and festivities seemed to fade in the back of my mind. Soon, the noise appeared more as a humming.
I hoped that Rangiku was not looking for me. She had been nothing but kind this entire day, and I was thankful. For her friendship. A part of me felt I did not deserve it. I was not overly interesting, in my opinion. And I did not have many friends before Rangiku. How could I even be sure I was doing this whole friendship thing right?
I walked up to the edge of the water. The moon was bright and its light reflected off the water like sparkly glitter.
"The moon is so pretty," I whispered to myself.
Why can't I be like the moon?
Someone who was mysterious, elegant, and subtle with grace. I skipped across the bank taking no mind of the water splashing against my geta shoes.
But someone who had the power to move waves too, I added. Then I would not have to worry about being weak, I would be perfect.
I sighed. How easily I became distracted. If anyone here to see me here alone they would think I was strange.
At least I have you goldfish. Or should I call you Haru?
It was childish having such an attachment to the little animal but I giggled anyways. My own laugh scared me. I was on my own now and the calm always emphasized how much you were alone.
I walked up to a small hill.
I kneeled onto the grassy floor which was cold and hard from last night's rain.
Then, I held my knees up to my chest and stared up at the sky again. Was it outlandish that I find tranquility in isolation?
There was a rustle of the trees before I felt a high reiatsu behind it. The sudden movements shocked me momentarily before I realized that it was probably Matsumoto or one of the guys looking for me.
"I'm sorry, I got lost." I said quietly over my shoulder.
There was a moment of silence.
"Ayame?"
My body went rigid.
His tone was cautious and surprised.
I turned behind me.
The outline of a lofty slender man appeared behind me. The only thing noticeable was the roughness of his hair. His face was shrouded by the night, but I did not need it to know who he was. My only problem was believing it was him. I rubbed my eyes. He held a lantern up to his face. His lips were parted and his eyebrows set in a hard line against his forehead. The harshness of his scars was dulled by the dim lamplight. It made him appear softened by the night.
"Shu-I mean L-Lieutenant?" My voice cracked. What was he doing here, I thought.
"Hm?" He walked closer, shining the light near my face.
"Is that you?" He asked.
He moved closer and kneeled beside me. The Lieutenant was wearing a traditional blue yukata and a jacket over it. Unsure of what to say, I held my hand to my mouth.
"Is someone sitting here?"
"N-No! I mean…" I could not bear to tell him I was sitting by myself.
He sat next to me and placed the lantern between us.
"H-How did y-you find me here?" I struggled to ask.
"I thought I had sensed your reiatsu."
He looked at me but this time he seemed to be analyzing something. I shifted uncomfortably under his steely gaze.
"Did you cut your hair?"
I touched the strands unconsciously.
"Not really..."
"You look different." He struggled to find an appropriate word.
Was different a bad thing or a good thing I wonder?
"If you were looking for Matsumoto and everyone else they should be over there."
I pointed in the direction I had come from. Hisagi did not make a motion toward that direction though.
Silence.
"Is it fine if I stay here?" He asked.
My heart jumped.
"A-Are you sure? I mean, you can probably see the fireworks better from over there..." My words were coming out quickly and began tripping over one another. I was too confused to think properly.
He did not respond. And I wondered if he had even understood me.
He looked at me again with those dark eyes of his. The weight of his stare was too much for me and I buried my head into my knees and picked the grass beside me.
His eyebrows furrowed and he stared at the sakura pin placed in my hair.
"I like your hair."
I stopped plucking the grass and looked slowly at the collar of his clothing.
He seemed as if he had regretted his comment.
"I mean, I like uh, how it's out of your face. It makes your eyes look..." He coughed immediately afterwards. And for some reason, I thought he may have been nervous.
He liked my hair? I thought it had made me look stupid. Was he trying to be nice? I didn't want to believe his words were actually a way of complimenting me. Yet, I blushed profusely and felt my whole body get warm.
"Ayame, listen," His voice was a lot more serious.
I swallowed and looked up at his eyes.
Silence filled the seemingly long distance between us but the silence this time was not upsetting; it was comforting. If I did not understand anything about Hisagi: What pain he was experiencing. What his thoughts were.
I could sense his emotion. I realized that he appreciated solitude and silence just as much as I.
A crackle rippled through the sky. Lights and flashes of red and blue illuminated the profile of his face as I stared at the firm yet strong lines of his countenance. His features were haggard, nervous and flustered all at the same time, a drastic difference from his usual calm level appearance. His visage was filled with so much sentiment yet he spoke no words. For the first time I found the courage to stare straight into his eyes.
I needed to see, I thought. I needed to see something, anything.
We sat there, looking at each other. And I felt that I might die. Another firework flew into the air and crackled and sprinkled lights of green and white. In the far distance the low hum of cheers could be heard.
I waited patiently but on edge to see what he would do next.
His cheeks flushed. His face moved slightly and hesitantly down towards mine. I could smell the sweat, and the tint of sake radiate from his warm moist breath. My face was burning now.
Finally, I couldn't take it any longer.
"L-Lieutenant?" My voice was strained and quiet.
Another spray of light shimmered across the black sky. A wave approving noises erupted from the crowd far off. But their sounds seemed so remote now. All I could hear was the steady breathing of my current Lieutenant's and my own heartbeat pounding in my ears.
"Please, call me Hisagi." He said.
I stared back at him mutely. His face retreated away from mine. And the heat from my face seemed to dissipate with it. I turned away and looked at the moon.
Then I heard him shuffling beside me. For a second, I believed that he might be leaving. I felt his leg brush mine. I swallowed. Then I scooted a tad bit closer to him. We were touching and that part of my body seemed to ignite with fire.
My throat was dry, and my mind was fuzzy.
"Are you cold?" He whispered next to my ear.
I could not answer and Hisagi did not wait for a response. He moved even closer, if possible, and placed his arm behind me. I stiffened at the contact and he was alarmed at my response.
Hisagi did not look at me but I craned my neck to see him. His face looked so mysterious lit up by the artificial fire. It looked surreal. The entire moment felt surreal.
After a moment, I gradually laid my head against his shoulder. It felt warm through the fabric.
We sat there in silence, relishing in this unexplained moment that no words could describe.
And I felt at peace.
Author's Note: That's the end of this chapter, I suppose. I want to really thank everyone who has been reviewing and stuff. (you know who you are) It really helps!