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A/n thank you all again for your patience and good wishes for my health. Unfortunately, the cold changed into allergies without a break. The good news is that I have medicine for allergies and feel better. Also, I must apologize for the delay with this chapter. I've had computer problems and writers block. I'm determined to have the next chapter out much sooner. Again, thank you for your patience and support.

Spencer opened his eyes to grayness. The hotel room lay in the gloom that matched his mood. Today was the day. Today, he'd say goodbye to his mother. He blinked slowly in the low light of the stormy day that felt more appropriate for a memorial service, than golden sunlight and blue skies. He closed his eyes again and thought about more sleep, but Chriscelia moved against him. He shifted and looked down at her curled into his right side. Her blond hair, mussed from sleep lay over his upper chest and shoulder. He liked watching her sleep even though he couldn't see her lovely hazel eyes.

Chriscelia moved again and sighed deeply. Her eyes fluttered, then closed. He kissed the tip of her nose. She moaned softly, and one of her hands slid from his chest to his groin. He hissed, and something he'd thought buried beneath a flood of grief raged to the surface.

"Celia," he growled and kissed her full lips.

Her eyes fluttered again and stayed open, as he worked his way down her neck to the hollow of her throat.

"Spencer."

"Don't talk," he said hoarsely. "I need you. Please!"

His hands dipped into her sleep pants, and she arched off the bed. "Oh, God. Spencer."

"Love me," he whispered in her ear.

"Yes!"

She bucked and pushed him over on his back. "Relax, baby. Let me do the work this time."

She straddled him and at the same time, in one smooth motion that mesmerized him, pulled her tee shirt over her head and tossed it away. She looked down at him with eyes that saw the real him, the true person that hid behind his everyday persona, that him that lived with drug addiction, PTSD and the loss of too many people he loved. She saw his true soul and the darkness that lived in an uneasy alliance with the light, and she didn't turn away.

His hands took possession of her breasts. He loved the fullness of them, and how smooth the skin felt on his palms. She blew out an explosive breath and closed her eyes, but only for a moment. "Oh no," she gasped out, her eyes going dark in the low light of the storm. "I said I'd do the work."

Her head fell forward, and her mouth ravaged his lips until he opened them and let her tongue fill him. He couldn't breathe when she released him, and her mouth moved from him to his chin, then his neck. His hips arched when her hands returned to his waist and pulled down his sleep pants. He began to forget everything, the pain, the loss, and the hopeless certainty that he'd never feel right again.

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Chriscelia found him in the living area of their suite after she'd showered and dressed in lounge pants and a tee shirt. Over the last week, they'd fallen into a routine of sleeping late and eating even later, then going out to all the places Spencer remembered from his childhood. It was as though he were trying to recall every memory he ever had with his mother. It hurt her heart to see him sitting there in the gray light of this day, knowing it was the day he, at last, had to say his final goodbye.

"Hey," she greeted him with a kiss.

Spencer smiled at her, and it was a smile that resembled a little the man she'd seen that day in the airport. His eyes held pain, but not the terrible depression that had clouded them for days.

"You feeling better?"

"I am," he said quietly.

"Good."

Spencer pulled her to him and embraced her hard. "I'm sorry about this morning."

She pulled back and swept one hand through his wavy hair. "Why are you apologizing?"

"I was a bit demanding. I barely let you wake before I –"

Spencer looked down at his hands. Chriscelia sighed and said. "Look at me, Spencer."

"I should have talked to you." Spencer protested. "We haven't had sex since my mom died. I was just feeling –"

"Like you needed comfort," Chriscelia said. "I understand, baby."

Spencer's beautiful eyes searched her face, and she waited for him to make up his mind what to say next. "I did," he finally said. "I don't know what happened. I woke up, and I was watching you sleep, and I just… felt different." Spencer shook his head. "I don't know what is wrong with me."

"You do know," Chriscelia argued. "There's nothing wrong with you. You're beginning to feel again, instead of going through the motions as you've done for the last week. You're not numb anymore, Spencer. That's a good thing."

He nodded and put his head on her shoulder. "I'm afraid I won't be able to make it through the memorial service."

"You will. Your friends are here. I get to meet the famous Derek Morgan, remember."

He chuckled at the enthusiasm in her voice. "Yes… I remember. He's very intrigued by you, too."

Chriscelia pushed him away. "What did you tell him?"

"Don't look at me like that. I didn't reveal anything untoward about you."

"I'm not sure I believe you. You're squeaking."

"I do not squeak," Spencer said firmly.

"Whatever you say," Chriscelia responded loftily.

Spencer tried to hug her, but she narrowed her eyes at him. "Don't try to kiss up to me," Chriscelia said and then laughed and kissed him firmly on the cheek. "Come on. It's getting late, and we are supposed to see Morgan, JJ, and Garcia before the memorial."

Spencer sighed and grabbed her hand. "I don't want to do this, Celia. I want to stay here with you and pretend everything is okay."

Chriscelia took his face in her hands. "Everything isn't okay, Spencer, but it will get better. I promise."

Spencer hung his head, then straightened his shoulders. "You're right, of course."

Chriscelia squeezed his hands tight. "I wish I weren't right. I wish none of this happened and that your mom had lived long enough for you to spend more time with her."

"I love you for saying that," Spencer let go and stood. "The problem is that I don't think I'd ever be ready for her death. Perhaps if I'd have the kind of mother other kids had, then it wouldn't be so difficult to say goodbye. Why did she have to suffer so much, Chriscelia? I don't understand."

Chriscelia watched him walk back to their bedroom as his last question echoed in her ears. If only there were an answer for him that could take away his pain.

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The rain stopped by the time Morgan, JJ, and Garcia knocked on his hotel door. The sun had begun to peek out from hiding behind pewter clouds in a white sky.

"Hey," Morgan greeted him with a long embrace. "How are you?"

"I'm holding on," Spencer said when he let go of his brother. "Just barely, but I'm better than I would be without Chriscelia."

Spencer turned to see her greeting Garcia and JJ. "Chriscelia, this is Derek Morgan. Derek, this is Chriscelia Moore."

Derek ignored her outstretched hand and hugged her instead. "I'm glad to meet you. Thank you for taking care of my man."

"Ditto," said Garcia.

"Yes," JJ agreed. "Thank you."

"Should we sit?" Spencer offered. "Or do you guys want something to drink?"

"No thanks," Derek said, but he did sit on one of the two sofas in the room.

"We're good," Garcia said and JJ nodded in agreement.

JJ hugged Spencer tightly. "You sure you're okay," she said softly.

"I'm alright for now, but I'm not looking forward to the service."

"I know," she kissed his cheek. "You'll make it through, Spence. We're all here."

"Emily sends her love," Garcia said as they sat.

"The others finally got a lead on Mr. Scratch," JJ said.

"You should be with them," Spencer said, and agitation filled his face. "I don't want you to lose this opportunity."

"They'll be fine," JJ said.

"Yeah, Monty is on the computer stuff as well," Garcia added.

"Yes, but as good as he is, he's not you," Spencer stated.

"Thank you, sweet cheeks, but even I am not indispensable."

JJ reached over and squeezed his free hand. "Don't worry about Mr. Scratch or the team. Emily promised to call us if she needs us."

"Yeah, pretty boy," Morgan added. "you need your friends with you. Don't worry about work right now. It'll still be there when you get back."

Chriscelia feathered her fingers through Spencer's hair, and then rubbed circles on his back. His shoulders relaxed and his body language changed. He uncrossed his legs and arms and leaned into her touch. He didn't see JJ look over at Morgan, or the older man's eyebrows cock at Chriscelia's obvious talent for calming his brother.

"Alright, I'll leave it alone," Spencer said and sighed. "I'm so glad you guys are here."

"There's no place we'd rather be," Garcia said.

He took in her somber black suit that fit her curves like a glove. She wore a red Dahlia in her hair, scarlet lipstick and glasses with red frames. Her shoes polished to a high shine, matched the color of her dress.

"Thank you," he said.

"You're welcome," they all said together, and everyone laughed a little.

"So," Morgan said with a smart-ass grin. "Tell me about yourself, Chriscelia."

"Morgan," Spencer said wearily.

"It's okay," Chriscelia said. "What do you want to know?"

"I want to hear your version of how you met my man over there," he wagged a finger between the two of them."

"I'll make you a deal," Chriscelia said as Spencer rolled his eyes in exasperation. "I'll tell you about how we met, and you tell me something the others don't know about you."

"She's got you there, Chocolate Thunder," Garica quipped, and JJ smirked.

"Chocolate Thunder," Chriscelia said. "Hm… I can use that."

Spencer grinned at her. "Yeah, I think that's an inspired idea."

"Use it for what," Morgan demanded as JJ and Garcia held in their laughter.

"Uh, no," Chiscelia shook her head. "You said you wanted to hear my version how we met and that's what you're going to hear."

Later, after Chriscelia told her story, the mood became somber again as Reid pulled on his suit jacket, while the others waited in the living area.

"I'm not sure I can't do this," he said as he watched Chriscelia put on her shoes.

Chriscelia adjusted his tie, and kissed him. "You can do this, Spencer Reid. I believe in you. Your friends are here, and I'm not going anywhere, but besides all the people that love you, there is something else you have."

"What?"

"You have your mother's love." Chriscelia laid her hand over his heart and felt it beating, a little too fast, but that was normal, she supposed. "She's here with you, in your heart. She'll never leave you."

"How do you know?"

His raspy whisper and the tears that collected in his amazing eyes broke her heart once more. "I know because your mother loved you so much, baby. That kind of love doesn't just disappear because she's no longer of this world. It stays with you."

"I hope you're right."

Chriscelia wiped away a tear from his cheek. "Just take it one breath at a time and hold onto me."

He clasped her hand and pulled her in for a lingering kiss. "Thank you."

"You don't have to thank me, Spencer. I love you."

"I love you too."

They left the bedroom to join their friends. Morgan, JJ, and Garcia stood as if they waited for something more important than anything previous and they smiled. Soon he was surrounded by their familiar presence that covered him like warm water. Chriscelia smiled at him. JJ and Garcia hugged him. Morgan slapped his shoulder, then hugged him tightly. "We will get you through this, Spencer."

"I know."

Spencer met their eyes, in turn, and saw only compassion and sorrow for him. He wished he could stop time at that moment and forever put off this next step, but it was a fool's dream.

"It's time," he said and followed his friends out into the now sunlit day beyond the safety of his hotel room.