Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.
OK, so here's my Easter present for you. this is the first chapter to Part II of TMTH:IY.
Sit back and enjoy!
Take me to heaven: I'm yours
Chapter 12: The icy cold, this life
Hey Momo?
Be my BFFL: Best Friend For Life, okay?
Or at least, the rest of my existence.
…
"Karin! Not like that!"
"Aw, why not? It is my side of the cave, right?"
"Well, okay. Fine. As long as it doesn't get on my side, got that?"
"Right!"
*SPLAT*
"Kariiin!"
"Oh I'm so sorry, Momo! The paint must've just slipped out of my hand and flown across the room. Gee, it seems to be doing that a lot lately."
"What do you mean? You only just threw it once…"
*SPLAT*
"Sorry, Momo? What did you just say?"
"Oh, Karin!"
*SPLAT*
"Yay! Paint fight! I'm in!"
"Well, Karin. You asked for it!"
*SPLAT*
*SPLAT*
*SPLAT*
"Woah, Momo! Three in a row! You really are Superman!"
"Superwoman, Karin. And yes, only the best for you, my darling!"
…
They lay silently on the small mat used for sleeping, both sharing Momo's one blanket. Karin grasped Momo's hand and entwined both their fingers together.
"Tell me how many stars are out in the night sky, Karin." Momo gazed at the constellations dreamily.
"Thirty-three billion, eighty-nine million, twenty-five thousand and three hundred and thirty-six."
"That's completely incorrect."
"I know."
Momo snuggled up beside her and looked away, knowing what Karin's reaction would be. "Toshiro loves you, you know that?"
Karin shot up to glare at the other girl. "Where the hell did that come from?" She asked angrily.
"The stars. Toshiro must be watching them too. He had always loved watching the stars." The brown eyed beauty gazed back at Karin, her lovely chocolate orbs filled to the brim with longing for her white-haired childhood friend. Momo had this amazing ability to distract you. With her large eyes and tight smile, she would confuse you, twist you around until you fell prey to her charms. She did this unknowingly, and failed to realise the effect she made on most men.
"If he loves them so much why doesn't he go and marry them?" Karin replied stubbornly, crossing her arms.
"Oh, Karin." And all the emotion in those two simple words wounded Karin more than Grimmjow ever could. Love, sadness, regret, pain and bitterness.
"I don't love him, Momo."
"So you say."
"I've had my chance with him. He's had his chance with me. I got rejected. We're done. That's it."
"It wasn't rejection, darling. All he wanted was time. He needed time to sort out his feelings."
"What feelings?" Karin retorted back.
Momo sat up too then and turned Karin's face to her own. She reached out and cupped Karin's face in her cool hands. She smoothed out the creases in her forehead, relaxing her muscles. "Don't frown like that, Karin. It doesn't become you."
"Why should I care if it becomes me?" Karin choked, clearly upset. Momo gave her a quick kiss on the forehead.
"Go to sleep, Karin. We can talk in the morning, alright?"
Karin sighed. "You sleep, Momo. I need to get some fresh air."
Momo nodded in concern. "Don't stray too far. You don't want the shinigami to catch you, alright?"
"Yes, yes. I know." Karin replied impatiently. Momo gave a tight smile.
"Night, Rin."
"Night."
Karin watched Momo slide back under the covers of the blanket they shared and give Karin one last worried glance before closing her eyes and falling prey to slumber. Momo had that magical ability to fall asleep at will. Karin had always envied that. In fact, there were many things Karin had always envied Momo of having. Her beauty, for instance, and her perfect femininity.
Karin spared the sleeping Momo one last glance before heading outside to think. The fresh air felt cool on her face and she breathed it in deeply. It tasted like grass and the first drops of morning dew. She sat down; making sure to sit within the bubble of Kidou Momo had created to keep intruders out. It would make them almost invisible to outsiders, Momo had told her. It was a spell she had created herself. Momo was smart. Karin envied that too.
Karin loved Momo the way she loved Yuzu. Momo was like the older sister she'd never had. But despite their similarities, Momo was really quite different to Yuzu. She had courage, for one thing. And strength. She was sensible and practical. A little overreacting at some times but Karin loved her for it. She hated cooking, but was always able to make some delicious meals for them both, consisting of fresh fish and stolen rice. And, if they were lucky, a stolen watermelon or two. Shunpo was really quite handy in Rukongai.
If Momo was Yuzu, her sister, then Toshiro was her late mother, as funny as it sounded. Lost a long time ago and far away from her. Never quite in reach. He was her labyrinth, and she was stuck in the middle, with no idea on where to turn next. One side was love and the other was loss. There was no other alternative. She could either love him, or lose him. And she wanted neither. She just wanted him to be there, not quite in front of her, but not quite behind her either.
It took a while for her to gather her thoughts together enough to want the aching of sleep again. It may have been a few minutes, a few hours? But she finally picked herself off the cold ground and joined Momo in their little bed. She lay down and closed her eyes, not really sleeping but not quite awake.
She was stuck in the middle, with no idea which way to turn, which path to follow. Her body fell limp and she dove into sleep, tracing the lines of familiarity and finding that she was walking precariously on the edge of losing her way, her sense of direction. And if anything, she didn't want to become another Kenpachi, running around in total loss, following orders from overenthusiastic young children.
Karin! They would shout at her. Come this way.
No, turn this way, Karin. Toshiro's this way!
You don't want to find Toshiro, do you? So go this way.
It's the next turn, I know it!
Karin!
Oh, Karin.
…
It took a while for Momo to convince Karin to see Toshiro. Getting some sense through Karin's thick skull didn't just take Momo's gentle encouraging. It had to be beat into her. After a whole stack of eggs and thirty-eight paintballs, (from god knows where), Karin finally gave in.
"Fine." She sighed through a mouthful of green paint, her hair dripping wet with bright orange shades of egg yolk. "But you can't force me to make up with him."
"Deal." The older girl nodded. They bumped fists.
…
Snore…
Tap. Tap. Tap.
Snore…
Scratch. Scratch.
"Well," Karin commented. "This place looks like fun."
Toshiro's head whipped around so fast that Karin got scared it might fall off. "What-What are you doing here?" He hissed in shock. "You could get found."
His eyes were wide open with shock. For once, his emotions glaringly obvious. The blood was slowly draining out of his face, his pale white complexion something to rival his hair. Karin found, with slight surprise, that she'd missed his little bouts of emotion and she wanted elongate it, drawing in their memories (even if it doesn't last forever). It took her a while to reply, and by then, her companion had already arrived. Toshiro's window really was, quite useful.
"Oh, what's a little execution or two? It's healthy. Better than sitting in an office all day, I bet."
"Karin!" Momo reprimanded, getting that look in her eyes. Karin just rolled her eyes.
"What? I bet the most exciting thing that happens to him is getting new paperwork. Oh, yippee, more papers to sign!"
And as she said this, she felt a change of pattern in the still air. Karin turned her head around and finally caught sight of what had been causing the snoring. She ran quickly over to the couch and knelt before the sleeping lieutenant. It seemed like the world had stopped. As if there were no shadows left in her life. All her cynical sarcasm and darkened attitude left her and there was only her, Matsumoto, and a waterfall of happy memories.
"Matsumoto." She said softly. "It's me, Karin."
She knew that the shinigami wouldn't be able to remember her. But that still didn't stop the small smile creep across her face, and the even smaller spark of hope alighting in her eyes. Momo just sighed and watched sadly, knowing that there's no possible chance of reminiscence.
Snore…
"Matsumoto?" Impatient, Karin picked up Toshiro's vase of lilies and dumped the entire contents; soggy flowers, water and all onto Matsumoto's face. She spluttered a few times before turning to glare at her.
Toshiro's a little ticked because the lilies were a gift from someone special. Momo's a little ticked because she was the one who sent the lilies in the first place.
"Good morning!" Karin said cheerily.
Well, it's a start.
Matsumoto gave a funny little gasp, which made Karin giggle. Momo's eyebrows creased in worry. Karin never giggled. The 10th division's lieutenant jumped to her feet in a second.
"What do you want?" she asked. Karin just laughed.
"Oh, don't be such a grump, Ran-chan. It's just me, Karin!"
"Yes, the last time you said that, you sliced me in the stomach." Matsumoto replied bitterly. It really shouldn't concern her that much, this girl. She really did seem quite sorry last time.
"Should I-" Momo whispered, glancing over at Toshiro.
"No." He replied quietly. "Let them sort it out."
Momo bit her lip in worry but refrained from interrupting. She knew that Toshiro would know Karin more than she ever would. (It didn't stop her from crying as soon as the women began yelling in anger).
"I don't care what you remember. You were my best friend! How could you ever write a note like that! Did you know how much you hurt me? Do you even care that Ulquiorra died?"
"I don't know what you're talking about! I've been right here in Soul Society since… since…"
"Since September 29th, right?" Karin choked. "Since the day you left Hueco Mundo."
Matsumoto became silent, her face going pale. Her hands shook as she turned to her captain. "Taicho!" Her beautiful ice blue eyes seemed frosted over. She didn't bother to hide the shock she felt. "Taicho… is this true?"
He didn't reply but she sensed his affirmative. All the blood drained out of her face (as if it hadn't already). She looked at Karin one more time. The young Kurosaki somehow reminded her of herself, too honest and too trusting. Too naïve for her own good. She felt regretfully like Gin as she turned and ran from the scene. Her footsteps resonated in the empty hallways and her sobs were muffled by distance. She ran for what seemed like hours before stopping. She fell back against a wall, exhausted. It seemed a good hiding place as any other. She slid down the wall, shaking, and shivering though she wasn't cold. She began gulping for air as she cried and the tears ran steadily down her face. She wasn't sure why she was crying. Why was she crying? Why was being an Espada affecting her so much? She should move on, she had moved on, without ever realising it.
Her mouth was as dry as her eyes were wet. She rubbed her face with her hands and stood up, holding onto the wall for reassurance. Why did it seem like the world was crashing down upon her? What happened in the past had happened in the past. She couldn't change anything now. Now all she could do was walk back to the office and keep her head up, her eyes alert, and her resolve unbroken. That's all she could do.
How was it? I tried to put a little of Matsumoto in it, how she felt about everything. I imagine she would be feeling a little overwhelmed.
Review please!