How to Fall Head over Heels
by TheBucketWoman
Disclaimer: I have no affiliation with LWD or any of its producers, writers, etc.
Chapter Fourteen
Part One: George
The doors opened directly on Derek and Casey.
"Oh God," Nora said, shaking her head and covering her face to hide the smile that was spreading despite her best efforts.
"We are never sleeping again," George muttered. "I am locking both bedroom doors and—"
"Georgie, don't be a moment killer," Nora said as she pulled George out of the way of the closing doors.
"Don't let us interrupt you," George said. Casey jumped. Derek had the most glazed, brainless expression on his face. It would be a lot of fun to recall it later and imitate it for Marti, Lizzie and Edwin, but now George had lecturing to do.
"If I remember correctly, Derek," George began, "there's a list of things that you are not supposed to be doing yet. Kissing was on the list, was it not?"
"Wait a minute," Casey said. "You're not supposed to be kissing?" She hit him on the arm. "You let me kiss you knowing full well that it's bad for you?"
Derek looked at her like he didn't see her point. George had to bite his tongue.
"Der-ek," she yelped, "I can't believe you'd do such a thing! Do you ever—"
"Take a breath, Casey," Nora said. Derek put one hand on Casey's arm and gestured for something to write with with the other.
The doctor didn't say no kissing. She said not to go crazy on the kissing. She knew better than to say no kissing, Derek wrote after Nora dug out his notebook.
"Are you sure?" Casey asked. Derek nodded.
"I don't believe you," she said. He threw his hands up in defeat.
"Actually that is what the doc said, Casey,"George said. "I just wanted to remind Derek of the importance of doctors' orders, but then I realized that it would be easier to have you do it."
Casey took a second to take that in, and said "Are you saying that I nag, George?"
"Uh-huh," George said.
"Mom!"
"Look at it this way, Casey," Nora said. "It's your prerogative as a girlfriend."
"Well, if you put it that way," Casey said.
HEY!!! Derek wrote and waved the notebook over his head. Casey grinned at him evilly and left to get the car.
"You have no rights, son "George said, starting to wheel him out. "You really should've figured that out by now."
Derek looked at Nora, who nodded in confirmation. "Best to surrender to the inevitable,"she said. She'd been holding Der Bear all this time and she handed it over to him. He clutched the bear in mock fear.
The second the wheelchair hit sidewalk, Derek hopped out of it. He stretched luxuriously, as if he hadn't walked in a week. A nurse on his way back from a smoke break took the wheelchair from George, who nodded a quick thanks.
Casey pulled up in the car and said "I don't have all day, Derek."
As Derek was climbing into the car, he cracked an imaginary whip.
"You better believe it," Casey said, smiling.
Part Two: Lizzie.
Lizzie and Edwin hopped off the bus and ran to the house. Edwin stopped himself on the porch, and put an arm out to restrain Lizzie.
"We need to be cool about this," he said. She rolled her eyes.
"Out of my way, Venturi," Lizzie said. "It's cold out here, warm in there. I see no reason to be out here." She pushed past him.
Lizzie walked into the house and passed Casey on the couch, tossing vague "Hey" over her shoulder as she made her way to the kitchen. She found Derek leaning against the island drinking something thick and green.
"'Sup," Lizzie said on her way to the fridge. He stuck his green tongue out at her, and stared at her until she broke into giggles and went over to hug him. He made a show of allowing it, but squeezed hell out of her.
"Do I want to know what you're drinking?" Lizzie asked. He handed it to her and she took a wary sniff and wrinkled her nose. "Spinach," she said, "and...fruit of some kind, and what is that...grass?"
Probably, he wrote. I didn't ask. Didn't wanna know. He drank the last of it, looking at the green film on the glass in disgust. He rinsed it out in the sink.
When he came back, he wrote, Excellent fake out by the way.
"I know," she said.
Edwin was waiting in the doorway, and Derek and Lizzie seemed to notice him at the same time. He was being a sap, standing there like he was afraid to move into the actual kitchen.
"Way to be cool, Edwin," Lizzie said. That seemed to break the spell.
"Does this mean I don't get your room?" Edwin said. Derek pointed at him as menacingly as he could manage. This usually sent Edwin running to hide behind the nearest large object, but Derek was too busy trying not to laugh that he didn't quite pull off menacing.
Then Edwin went in for his hug.
Part Three: Edwin
Edwin decided to enjoy this mellow, non-noogying Derek for as long as he hung around. He was in a surprisingly good mood. They probably still had him on some nice drugs.
Marti, who Edwin and Lizzie knew had not slept too well all weekend, attached herself to Derek's leg as soon as she got home, eventually falling asleep on top of him on the couch. Derek himself didn't take long to fall asleep on top of Casey, who struggled in vain to read her book with the combined weight of the two of them on her. Nora got at least two pictures of this, both with Casey rolling her eyes. Nora gave Lizzie the memory card and she ran to save them on the computer.
After an hour or so, his dad came home, took a couple of minutes to admire the stack of kids on the couch until Lizzie said that Nora's gotten pictures.
"Cool," George said. "We have our Christmas card."
Casey gave a little snort of disgust, then said, "George? Little help here?" She gestured at Derek and Marti. Dad scooped Marti up, which woke up Derek for about a second. He stretched and finally got off of Casey who promptly got out of the way before Derek leaned over again. He looked up briefly like he was wondering where his pillow went, but then he went right out.
Edwin saw Derek wake to the sound of the blender, like a kitten at the sound of a can opener. He sat down to dinner with the rest of them and drank a much nicer looking smoothie while they ate an omelet that Nora whipped up using leftover spaghetti. It looked weird, but tasted pretty good, so Edwin decided to shelve the 'I'll have what he's having' line that popped into his head when he saw the food.
It was Edwin's turn the do the dishes, so he knew something was up when his dad shooed him and Lizzie out of the kitchen and told them to watch TV with Marti and Casey, while Derek stayed at the table.
"A little surveillance is in order," Lizzie said as she waved him over to the doorway to eavesdrop with her.
"Subtle, guys," Casey said from the couch.
Part Four: George.
All day, he'd been planning what he was about to say. He planned and revised it like he would for a jury. His officemate had seen him visibly rehearsing and had laughed at him for about ten minutes.
He took too long to get started and Derek started to squirm.
"Quit it," George said, sitting down at the table so that he was eye to eye with his oldest son.
"I had a talk with Jerry Davis the other day, to thank them all for taking Marti Friday night. Nora sent me over with a cake," George began. "So we sat there, eating the cake, Jerry and I, and we got to talking about you."
"Now you know that he's never been too crazy about you, and he's had some reasons, as you know. But the real reason had nothing to do with you crushing their peonies, or swimming in their pool. No, his real reason, he said, was that he has a beautiful teenage daughter, and as such, he hates all teenage boys. So you, being a teenage boy are persona non grata. Needless to say, this was pretty funny until Jerry reminded me that I had not one beautiful daughter but three. And that two of them are teenagers. So I have one beautiful teenage step-daughter and one teenage son who are apparently crazy about each other. Which puts me in an awkward position."
Derek knew not to so much as blink during this monologue. He'd trained his son well.
"So," he continued, "I'm going to talk to you seriously here. We've already had this talk, but circumstances change when you share a bathroom and an adjoining wall with the object of your affection. I don't think that either of you are stupid, but I remember what it was like to be sixteen. It wasn't that long ago despite what you might think. And what I remember the most is how my brains tended to fall down on the job here and there. This is what I'm afraid of. I'm thinking in terms of reality, here. I trust you and I trust Casey, and Nora and I will be there for the both of you no matter what, but I can't stress enough the importance of using your common sense. Now I do not endorse the idea of sex of any kind, but again, I'm not an idiot, and I want to make sure that you two are always safe." He pulled out a bag from the drugstore and watched color drain from his son's face.
"That's pretty much the reaction I expected," George said. "But I believe that you'll do anything for Casey. Am I right in assuming this?" Derek nodded. "So you will be responsible, right?" Another nod.
"I'm glad," George said, handing the bag of condoms to Derek.
"Now," George continued, "I think that you and Casey, mostly Casey, have some explaining to do to the others, yes?" He beckoned to Derek to follow him to the living room. George collided with Edwin on the way.
George took a split second to figure out what Edwin and Lizzie were up to, and he was ticked, but he'd deal with them later.
"Sit," he said to the three of them. "Casey?" he said.
"George?" Casey said.
"You're up," he said. Nora came up behind him and slipped an arm around his waist, leaning her chin on his shoulder. Her timing could only mean that she'd been eavesdropping too.
"Guys," Casey said, her voice wavering like a sheep's. "Um, this is going to be extremely weird but..."
"You and Derek," Lizzie said. "We know."
"I know," Casey said. "Cuz you were listening, but we need to talk about how you guys feel about it."
"You should kiss," Marti said. Derek stifled a laugh. Casey colored.
"We've...done enough of that for one day," she said. Edwin wrinkled his nose.
"TMI," he said.
"You Venturis and your acronyms," Casey said. "What's TMI mean?"
"Too much information," Lizzie said. "Get with the program, Case."
"Anyway," Casey said. "We just need to talk about how this affects everybody."
"Why?" Edwin asked.
"What?"
"Why do you think this has to be so dramatic?" Edwin asked. "We're obviously okay with it. We probably knew about it before you did. As did Dad and Nora."
George felt Nora nod into his shoulder.
"I guess I'll just sit down then," Casey said.
Part Five: Derek.
An hour or so after Casey's abortive attempt at her speech, the doorbell rang. Derek got it and opened the door on his mother. He waved her in. This was inevitable.
"I come in peace" she said. She turned to Casey, who was alone at the couch. "Can I talk to the both of you?"
"Okay," Casey said uncertainly, patting a spot on the couch next to her. Derek sat down on Casey's other side.
His mother got right down to business. "I wanted to apologize to both of you."
"Huh?" Casey said.
"Because, well, I have a tendency to be a little judgmental and neither of you deserve it. I think that I underestimated the both of you. I had a long talk with your father last night, Derek, and he reminded me of that."
Casey said nothing, continued to look confused. Derek let her go on.
"I'm afraid that I made a horrible first impression on you, Casey," she continued. "I came off like a dragon lady, and I knew it, but I was unable to stop myself. Since you are very important to my family, I don't want to alienate you."
"I honestly didn't think you were that bad," Casey started.
"You looked at me like a chicken looks at a bucket," his mother said. "And I just interrupted you, I'm sorry."
"No big," Casey said. "I was just going to say that I was having kind of a shaky weekend, for obvious reasons, so I think I had that look on my face the whole time."
Derek nodded.
"All the same, I didn't help things," his mother said.
All of this apologizing was making Casey more nervous, Derek could tell. He put an arm around her.
"That reminds me," his mother said, gesturing at the two of them. "Do you have something to tell me?"
"Well, um," Casey said. Derek went for the almighty notebook.
"Don't bother, hon," his mother said. "You've obviously finally made your move."
"Huh," Casey squeaked, "How could you possibly—"
His mother was smiling. "You kids are so obvious." Casey hid her face.
"I'll be honest," his mother continued. "It's weird. I am thoroughly weirded out by this, but your father gave me a piece of his mind when I said as much to him last night. And I decided that he was right, and that I need to trust the two of you, and even if I didn't trust you, there would be no stopping you."
Wow, Derek thought. Good, he wrote.
"So," his mother said. "That's about it."
You're not happy about any of this, Derek wrote. Casey blatantly peeked at the page before he handed it off.
"You're right," his mother said. "But that's not your problem."
I know, but I'm sorry you're unhappy, he wrote.
"I'll get over it," she said. "It's nothing personal, Casey, honey. For the record, I liked you immediately. This is just weird."
"It is," Casey agreed. Derek nodded.
"Well, I'm going to go bug your brother and your sister for a bit, then I will be on my way, Puppy."
"Puppy?" Casey said. Derek shot her a dirty look.
"Puppy," his mother agreed. "I'm just gonna..." she gestured to the stairs and Derek waved her away in exasperation. She just had to play the puppy card. Why would anyone want to give Casey that kind of ammo?
"Puppy," Casey said as Derek's mother went upstairs. She really wasn't going to let him hear the end of it.