So, another installment. Let me know what you think. Ya know, if you feel like it. Thanks! –SJ :)

….

Claire is waiting for me in her room, and the light from the window makes her hair practically glow. I pause in the doorway, her maid curtsies and scurries down the hall, looking over her shoulder at me. I see Claire unobtrusively wipe her hands on her skirt, so I know she is at least as nervous as I am, and for some reason that gives me confidence.

"Claire," I incline my head to her, and bow a little, keeping my countenance light. She is beautiful, and I don't think she knows it, which makes her all the more attractive. In that, she reminds me of Fae. I push the unwilling visual of Fae from my mind, tucking it back. Now is not the time. Really no time will ever be the time.

"Prince Calix," she smiles and curtsies in return.

Taking a deep breath, I offer her my arm, and she takes it in her hand. I'm glad I ditched the suit jacket I was wearing this morning. Her light touch on my elbow is comforting and warm. I didn't realize how much I missed being touched, even in something as simple as this. As she closes her door, I say "Please just call me Calix, at least when we're alone together."

"Okay, Calix." I like the way my name rolls off her tongue. She doesn't blush or even miss a step. She has a quiet, composed demeanor that I envy.

"Thanks for agreeing to join me for lunch. I think this will be nicer than eating with a crowd." I guide her through the palace, heading to the entrance of the gardens and the picnic that I arranged earlier in the day.

"Well," she says drily, "the crowd has certainly thinned since breakfast."

I glance to make sure she's teasing me, and the half smile playing on her lips confirms she is. "Oh. I suppose that is the topic of conversation today?" I am reminding myself that I have nothing to feel guilty about. Nothing.

"The Women's Room was rife with discussion." She bumps shoulders with me, and it reminds me how tall she is.

"Hm." I lead her to the table set up in the gazebo, and pull out her chair. "I'm not used to the Women's Room being rife with much. If Mom wants time alone to work, she heads to her study."

She sits, still smiling, "Well, I think the remaining twenty of us are livening it up a bit."

I take my seat and lean forward a little, looking into her blue-green eyes, "So, what's the scoop? What's everyone saying about me?"

"Besides that you have something against brunettes?" She raises an eyebrow.

I clear my throat and can feel myself blushing a little, "Hopefully?"

"I would never forgive myself if I told the secrets of the Women's Room," she laughs lightly, and places her napkin in her lap. And, something tells me I won't be successful with this line of questioning.

"Point taken. May I?" I gesture towards the food. She assents and I fill her plate with a variety of dishes and set it before her before I fill my own. As we begin to eat, I ask, "Well, since you won't tell me the gossip from the Women's Room, how about telling me more about yourself? You're from Likely?"

She puts one finger in front of herself as she finishes chewing, and then, responds, "That was not the question I was expecting. I don't know why?" I grin back at her, and wait for her to answer. Her eyes are sparkling in the daylight.

And I try to remember what they remind me of…Fae's always remind me of jewels. That dark blue-purple. I hear Claire's voice like an echo, as she shares that she's the only daughter of a province administrator. I can't stop the flashback. The morning after our first night together, Fae slept curled into my shoulder. I woke early and kept still, just watching her sleep. She was so different from the other women I had spent time with, like she didn't even care that I would be king. Her eyes opened, and I was watching her. She had grinned and pulled me in closer, before teasing, "You know that's creepy, right Cal? Waking up to those gorgeous brown eyes staring down at me." And I'd never felt so completely someone else's and still myself. I could be just Cal.

"Cal?" Claire questions, "Are you all right?" She is standing now, a hand on my arm.

Something about her stance or the way she uses my nickname makes me gasp for air. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," I am panicking and tripping over my own feet as I stand. "The guards will show you in. I—" I look back at her confused expression as I stumble in to the palace, trying to find my footing.

The guard moves to steady me, but I wave him away. "Thanks, Officer Cameron. Please, show the lady back to her room. And ask for her discretion." I don't stop for his reply. My only thought is that I have to make it back to my room before I pass out.

…...

After a sharp rap at the door, Ethan enters without fanfare. I expect him to make some sort of joke but instead he asks his question in a barely audible voice. "What happened?"

I flip on my bed from my stomach to my back, an arm thrown over my face so I don't have to look at him. "Mom sent you?"

"No, I came because I actually care about you, you ass." I hear him throw himself into my desk chair. "I'm wondering why myself."

That sounds like the Ethan I am familiar with, "Nice of you to show up, I guess."

"Come on, Cal. Don't give me that crap. You almost passed out in the gardens during lunch. You skipped all your meetings this afternoon and are well on your way to missing dinner. Your family is worried. And, just so you know, you don't look deathly ill. What gives?"

I don't want to put words to how I am feeling; verbalizing everything going through my mind would make it real. I don't want to make it real.

"You were eating with Claire," he prompts me.

I prop myself up on my elbows. "I looked at her eyes."

"Oh." He runs his hand over his face and sighs. "And that caused a full panic attack?"

"I thought I could do this, Ethan. I need to do this."

He sighs again, "What I don't get, Cal is how this experience is any different than college?"

I look at him, "For one, I am not taking in nearly the same amount of alcohol. Secondly, I am around my entire family. And, I met Fae. It sounds absolutely ridiculous and I don't even want to say it out loud. So, please take pity and don't make me."

"No. I get it," he reassures me. And I believe him. "But, this is your choice. Inheriting the crown. Choosing a wife through the Selection. More than that, it's your responsibility. You said it's over with Fae. You have to let her go. I thought you were past this."

"I'm not as strong as I thought I was," I confess quietly.

"As long as I've known you, you've underestimated yourself. There are twenty women who will do anything to help you forget her. Take the opportunity."

I just nod. I know he's right, but around every corner is another reminder of Fae. She made me a better version of myself. And, I'm so off-center without her. How can I be fair to anyone else when so much of my heart is still hers?

"You have an hour before dinner, which you will attend. Take a shower. Put on a clean suit. Forget her. I will be back."

Forty-five minutes later, Ethan arrives as promised. He is bearing two highball glasses each a quarter of the way full with honey brown liquid. I silently raise my glass to him, and then down the drink in two swallows. It burns and warms my throat, and the aftertaste is sweet but not cloying. Dinner is surprisingly uneventful. The women that are left talk quietly with each other as they eat. And the family pretends I haven't spent the whole day hiding in my room. I sit in between Dad and Mom, and they confirm for themselves that I have complete control over my composure again.

As the rest of the family stands to leave, Dad leans to me and says, "Maybe you're in the mood for a movie tonight?"

I consider, and remember how Viviana had me laughing this morning. A trip to the theater seems like it may be too tame for her, but I don't really want to spend the evening alone. And, I also take the hint. Dad is telling me to dive right back in. So, I take a deep breath and do just that.

"Miss Soledad," I begin, as I match pace with Viviana in the hallway. I notice some of the other women pretending not to notice me addressing her.

'"Yes, Prince Calix?" Viviana's smile reaches her eyes and beyond as she takes my offered elbow. She always sounds like she is close to full-out laughter.

"Would you like to join me for movie?"

She is laughing now as she responds, "Well, I was planning a full evening of reading and possibly sulking by myself. But if you insist."

"Oh, I do. And you can even pick the movie." I enjoy the banter, and hope she keeps up her share and mine over the course of the evening.

"The movie doesn't matter," she insists. "The most important question is will there be copious amounts of popcorn? And will you teach me how to make it?"

"I can answer yes to both questions, but why would you want to learn how to make it?" I guide her into the palace theater and to the counter where the popcorn popper and supplies are kept.

She rolls her eyes at me, "Really? You don't think this would be an amazing story to share with my family? My grandkids will be extremely tired of hearing about it, I can promise you."

"So you don't think you'll win?"

"I have no expectations. One of my patients dared me to fill out the application one night on third shift, and if I did they would quit fighting their required blood draw. And, here I am, making popcorn with the prince."

I just grin as we sort the supplies, taking Ethan's advice and pushing the thoughts of Fae from the forefront of my mind. Fae and I had movie marathons every weekend. I did the popcorn; she melted the butter and added the salt. But, my composure didn't falter this time.

The memories might come, but eventually they will fade. Maybe the lessons I learned with Fae will help me to love one of these women even more.

…..

Thanks for keeping up with the story and reviewing/favoriting/following. :) Next up—I wonder what the family thinks of the women? -SJ

azure blue espeon: Thanks for the question about Cal. Since he is still a little touchy, and is pushing himself through the beginning of the Selection, I wonder if he is going to have an honest conversation with himself or not? And, I wonder if he is going to rely on the skill set that he used in college or be the guy we all liked when he was with Fae? :) I appreciate your thoughts. CH 13 was actually pretty difficult for me to write, and I'm not sure I nailed it.

Username1096: Thanks so much—I really struggled with the last chapter, so I am glad you enjoyed it. What did you think of Claire and Viviana in this one? :)

The Devil Wears Westwood: Viviana is sassy. Do you think it's because she's a little older? What did you think of her in this chapter? I personally want to give Cal a kick in the pants. Come on, Cal. Get it together! ;)

Guest: I know. Hard to believe.

AcademicGirl: I do that whole waking up thing with socks. If I forget to take them off, it's ugly. Vara is a difficult lady to love, but I anticipate more of her in the book. And, really no one should call twins "The Twins." How amazingly annoying! I'm glad you liked the last chapter, because it was not pretty writing it. And, truth, I don't think it will ever be where I want it… So, yeah. And, no need to apologize! Long reviews are fun to read. :)

Jthornestudent: Awww, thanks. Viviana is quite the character. I think she'll be good for Cal to interact with. :)

dolly123: Yes, Cal's jerkiness rears its ugly head, doesn't it? He can be totally insufferable. :) I know the overall Selection moves, and I am trying to write to get to them. ;) I am so excited to actually get it down!

luv2read4reading: Got it!

Selection Fan: Thanks! Trying to keep it good… :)

Guest: So noted. Thanks for reading! :)

…

And, for the bracket…. Gale by a landslide.

Next up: Aspen (The Selection) VS Mal (Grisha Series)