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thanks, Nic, for making this better, best. much love.

It wasn't hard to fall for Garrett Kelly.

I mean, yeah, he was hot – really hot. But there was a lot more to sexiness than just looks. The way he walked down the hall, for one. All confident and laid back, like he knew where he was headed but it wasn't a production to get there. I'd never really noticed him before, but I sure noticed him now. He sought me out by my locker as soon as I got to school on Monday, his eyes crinkling when he smiled at me. When we talked, it was like there was no one else around. I didn't mean that in a cheesy way. It was like, when he spoke to you, he was really paying attention to you.

Once I had him on my mind, it was pretty difficult to get him out.

Not that I didn't try. I was determined not to be an easy catch this time around. Game playing was stupid, and I knew that, but I guessed it was more a matter of not wanting another broken heart. I'd never been good at practicality though. The heart wants what the heart wants, and in this case, it was beginning to want Garrett.

He didn't make it easy to ignore him, either. He'd never sat at our lunch table before, but on Monday he plopped right down next to me, slinging an arm around the back of my chair. He and Jasper were teammates, so it wasn't that out of the ordinary. No one seemed to even blink. I played it off, but I was very aware of his presence.

From then on out he was always around: at our lunch table, during the few spare minutes between classes, after school but before practice. He always found a way to talk to me, or sit next to me and pull me into a one-on-one conversation. The attention was flattering, so different from what I was used to, that I found myself wanting him to single me out.

One day when Alice and I both had free time after school – a rarity for us both – we went down to the pool to watch the swim team practice. Because of dance, she'd only been a couple of times, and I'd never had any reason to go. She said the coach didn't mind if students and parents came to watch, as long as we stuck to the bleachers and stayed quiet.

It wasn't hard to see why Garrett was the captain. All the guys were strong swimmers, but he was by and far the best. His signature stroke was the butterfly, and it was fascinating to watch him swim up and down the lanes, his muscled shoulders spread like wings.

Eventually the coach blew his whistle and the guys pulled themselves out of the water. Garrett snapped his cap off and ran his hand through his hair and over his face.

All that shiny, toned, bare skin… by the time I actually looked at his face he'd already seen me ogling him. He grinned at me, and winked.

Yeah, it wasn't hard to fall for him at all.

It didn't take him long to ask me out; it took even less time than that for me to agree.

The first time we went out, we went bowling. I hadn't done that since I was a kid. Even though I was a little rusty, we had a lot of fun. There was a lot of laughing, and a lot of hands on mine while he taught me the "correct" way to throw a strike.

For our second date, we went out to eat at this quiet little place in downtown Stuart. I got to know him a lot better that night. He told me how he'd been swimming competitively since childhood, and how his father had been his first coach. Even though his parents were divorced, his father lived nearby and they were close. Like me, he was an only child.

The post date process was the same each time: he drove me home, walked me to the door, kissed my cheek, and waited for me to let myself in. Both times I was relieved he hadn't tried to kiss me, and then vaguely disappointed.

Maybe that was part of his plan, to make me want him so that when he finally busted a move I'd be ready and willing.

On our third date we went to the movies at the Treasure Coast Mall. I was a novice at dating, so I found it both amusing and appealing that our outings were so typical. There wasn't much to do in Jensen Beach, but I was used to hanging on the beach or at people's houses, usually drinking or smoking. Or both. Garrett wasn't into that, though. He said weed messed with his lungs, in turn messing with swimming.

It didn't make much of a difference to me. I liked smoking, but I had always been able to take it or leave it.

Tonight, our hands were clasped on the armrest between us, and I kept feeling him glance over at me. Finally I looked at him, trying not to smile.

"What?" I mouthed, hoping it was what I thought it was.

He leaned toward me, running his nose along my cheek. "Can I kiss you?"

He was so, so appealing, and I was suddenly so, so nervous.

I nodded, almost holding my breath. He leaned closer and kissed me. Our lips met and, after a moment, he slipped his tongue into my mouth. I was distantly aware of the half eaten Snickers bar in my hands being squished as my fingers clenched involuntarily around it.

He broke the kiss after a while, softy kissing both corners of my mouth before sitting back. I opened my eyes and turned back to the screen, slightly breathless.

And so it began.

Whereas Edward had always been a bit of a mystery, Garrett was more of an open book. He didn't seem to have any reservations about relationships, or about letting me know he liked me.

Garrett always came to the front door, and never to my window. I was glad he wasn't into that. Only one boy had done that, and those memories felt sacred. I would've felt a little sick inside, being that way with someone else. I wanted new experiences, ones unique to Garrett and me.

Because I often worked into early evening, he got into the habit of stopping by the bookstore after practice or work to wait for me to get off. He had this table he always sat at, in Starbucks, where he'd do his homework and sneak glances at me. Sometimes, if it was slow, I'd join him for awhile.

We also went bowling a lot, which was fun in a sweet, dorky way. I had to admit though, I was getting pretty kick ass at it.

Not surprisingly, my parents liked him right off the bat. My father always did have a good nose for shenanigans, and Garrett was as straight laced as they came. It was nice not having to worry about being caught doing… whatever.

The girls liked him too, which was important to me. It wasn't like I needed their permissions to date, but we'd always looked out for one other. They kept it real; I trusted them. Plus, I wanted to feel comfortable if we were all going to be hanging out together. Group chemistry was important – regardless of how I felt for a guy, I didn't want to forget about my friends.

I sort of missed Jake. He was doing his own thing lately, hanging out with the same friends he'd always had, playing soccer and chasing girls. He seemed indifferent toward Garrett, and I wondered if that had anything to do with old feelings for me. I really hoped not, but there was nothing I could do about it.

We spent time with Jasper and Alice, though. Jasper and Garrett were a lot alike, relaxed and easy going, and they were friends anyway.

Still, I was spending more and more alone time with Garrett, which automatically meant less time with Alice and Rose. It happened so subtly I wasn't even aware of it until I spoke to Rose about it one day in biology.

"So, have you spoken to Emmett recently?" I asked, scooting my stool closer to her.

"Actually, he's been calling almost every night." She smiled, doodling in her notebook.

"Really?" I asked. "When did this start?"

"Like, a couple of weeks ago. Right after he went back."

Emmett had been in town for a visit, and it seemed as though he and Rose had gotten really close again.

"That's so sweet… how come you didn't tell me?"

She looked up. "Well, you've been a little…preoccupied lately."

I winced, putting down my pencil. "I'm sorry, Rose. We should do something together soon, all three of us…"

"Stop it." She rolled her eyes and went back to her doodles. "I'm just glad you're not moping around because of what's-his-name."

Edward was not a topic we broached often, but he was always going to be floating at the fringes of things. Rose was still in close contact with his brother; it was inevitable. Thankfully, it didn't sting the way it had right after he'd left.

I nodded, looking up at the board to make sure Mr. Banner was still busy. "Me too."

"Do you ever… think about …?"

"What?" I frowned at her, not used to her beating around the bush.

"I mean, do you ever regret not having sex with him?"

Pausing, I considered what she was asking. While I did still think of Edward, I hadn't really thought about that in a while. If anything, though, I felt a little conflicted about it. "Not really."

She nodded and started drawing again. I was slightly flustered that she'd even ask that, especially when it had been so long since I'd even been with Edward. Instead of dwelling on it, I opened my text book and began taking notes for the chapter review.

I was fumbling through my back pack for a highlighter when I felt Rose rap my knuckles with her pencil.

She directed my eyes to her paper. Scrawled in Rose's messy script was one word: Bullshit.

With a smiley face.

Sighing, I scribbled a note back to her.

Even if I wished it could have happened, it was never a good time. Anyway he's gone. Maybe it's better this way.

Rose read the note and nodded, tucking it into her pocket. "It probably is better. No regrets."

Exactly.

Garrett and I were both fairly busy with school stuff and jobs, plus he had swimming, but we always found time to be together. It was… effortless.

By the time the school year ended, though, we were pretty much inseparable. That summer was near perfect. I was given a few more hours at the bookstore, so I had cash, but I also spent hours at the beach with Alice and Rose. Days were spent lazing beneath umbrellas and listening to the ocean. At night we were with our boys, doing our own thing. Emmett had come home for the summer, picking right up where he'd left off with Rose.

Sometimes, when you're used to having to work so hard to maintain something, having it come easy takes getting used to. I'd never realized how simple it could be to be with someone until I found Garrett.

We spent hours just talking, sometimes on the phone but mainly at the beach. One of my favorite things to do was toss down a blanket and curl up beside him, chatting about everything from politics to college. He wanted to study humanities and social sciences at the University of Miami. His being inspired, inspired me.

It was on one of those lazy, summer nights that I realized I loved him.

I'd made him dinner – with Mom's help, of course – at my house, and afterwards we went back to his house to watch movies. We were in the middle of a particularly romantic scene when he paused the movie, cupped my face, and said he loved me. I told him I loved him, too. I lost my virginity that night.

It wasn't perfect by any means, but it felt right. I was glad I'd waited to do it with someone who was devoted to me, someone who loved me like I loved him. I hated even comparing what we had to what Edward and I had, but it was hard not to. When it came down to it, I'd been so young before. Edward and I had been so crazy hot for each other that we'd been practically combustible. It may not have ended so nicely, violent delights having violent ends and all that.

On the flip side, though, Garrett and I fit together so well that sometimes I'd over think things. I was afraid things were destined to go terribly wrong, simply because they'd been going so fantastically right for so long.

That kind of thinking irritated the hell out of my friends.

"Life's going to happen, Bella," Rose said, pursing her lips. "You just have to enjoy the ride, right? If things start to change, then change with them."

Easier said than done, but she was right. I knew from experience that I couldn't always control what happened in my life.

Things shifted when I started junior year, but not the way I thought they would.

Garrett left to go to college down south. At first, I was a little depressed about it. I didn't want what we had to fade. I cried about it to the girls, complained, but he'd had his plan mapped out way before he met me. There was nothing I could do.

Not that I'd wanted to hold him back, anyway. I convinced myself that if things were meant to work, they would.

I did miss our lunch time dates and week day romps in his room, but we talked and texted all the time on the phone. Plus, he drove up every single weekend, sometimes even surprising me on weeknights, showing up at my house with flowers, or a U of M sweatshirt or something equally as corny.

One night, Alice and I were doing our chemistry homework together over the phone. Neither of us was very good at it, and it was better when we had one another to check answers.

Alice, who'd always been so damned independent anyway, thought that it was a positive thing we had time apart. Jasper had graduated as well, but because he was going to school in Georgia, she saw him even less. "Maybe it's good. Now you guys can let the relationship breathe a little."

"I know," I mumbled, scribbling down a formula. "I just need to get used to it."

And I did. Any fears I'd had dissolved once it became apparent that Garrett was just as committed to making things work as I was. He'd proved that distance didn't have to be this insurmountable obstacle. Granted, he was only a couple of hours away, but still.

In May, I brought Garrett to my prom, just like he'd brought me to his the year before. I didn't think things could get any better than dancing with my best friends and boyfriend underneath the stars.

Some of the kids got hotel rooms, but we didn't bother. We hung out at a diner with a huge group of my friends, goofing around until we were exhausted.

He dropped me home as the sky was beginning to lighten, promising he'd be by later on.

The next day, Garrett was quieter and more pensive than usual.

"What's up?" I asked eventually, covering my mouth as I yawned.

He glanced over at me, giving me a small smile. "Got good news today."

"Yeah?"

He nodded. "Remember that exchange program I told you about?"

My heart sank. I vaguely remembered him saying something about it a couple of months before.

"Did you… get in?"

He nodded again, pulling into the driveway of a house I was unfamiliar with.

"Um… whose house is this?" I laughed, squinting up at the rather large, Spanish style estate in front of me.

"I'm kind of house sitting for my aunt and uncle." He grinned, jumping out. "They have a pool, tons of food, huge TVs…"

"Nice," I said appreciatively, following him to the front door. "It's like… a staycation."

He looked back at me, amused. "A what?"

"You know, like the commercials. A staycation… a vacation at home?"

"Something like that." He opened the door and we walked inside.

"So, tell me about the exchange program," I urged, leaving my sandals and bag by the couch.

Garrett led me over to the glass doors. The pool was just outside, and way beyond, the ocean. It was gorgeous.

"Well, it's more of a study abroad program… it's in Brighton."

I stared back at him. "Is that in…"

"England," he finished, opening the sliding glass door. "They have programs that last a year, but I'm just going for the spring semester."

On one hand, I was relieved that we had a good few months before he had to leave. On the other hand, though… a semester? It was better than a year, I supposed. That would have really put a damper on things.

"So, how long exactly?"

"January to June."

"Wow," I cried softly, trying to wrap my mind around it.

"I know," he said, wrapping his arms around me. "It's a good six months… but it's a really good opportunity. My dad did something like this when he was in college and he says he's never regretted it…"

"No, I know," I said quickly, putting an end to his rambling. "I think it's awesome. You should go. I'd go, if I had the chance." I meant it, too, even though the thought of him being that inaccessible for that long freaked me out a little.

"Maybe you will one day."

"Maybe I will," I agreed, shrugging.

I'd had him for a year and half, and it had been beautiful. There was no need to panic about something that was still six months away. We had another summer, and that's all I wanted to focus on for the time being.

At least, that's what I told myself.

In the guest room later, where Garrett was staying while he watched the house, we ate pizza in bed.

"It's so weird you're gonna be in England for six months," I said, wiping my hands on a napkin. "I bet you'll get to travel to other places n Europe, too."

"Probably." He paused, frowning slightly. "I didn't think they'd accept me, actually."

I rolled my eyes. "You're good at everything… of course they accepted you."

He was quiet for a moment. "I really don't want to leave you."

I swallowed back the tearfulness that had been prickling at me ever since he'd told me. "I don't want you to leave either."

Still, he heard the shaking in my voice and pulled me into his arms. Kisses of comfort turned into kisses of another kind, and for awhile, it was easy to forget.

Lying beneath the covers later, with Garrett dozing next to me, it occurred to me that we might not be forever after all. Oddly, the thought didn't devastate me. I'd known going into the relationship, long before, that things could change in the blink of an eye. In some ways I felt lucky that we'd had as long as we had.

It didn't mean that I liked thinking of being apart – in fact, I hated it – but like Rose was so fond of saying, I had to just roll with it. Who knew; maybe our relationship would grow even stronger.

Sometimes great things came out of unlikely circumstances.

Somehow we remained stoic about it, the sense of rapidly impending separation. It helped that we had so much time to prepare for it.

I told him how I felt, wanting to be honest and real. I told him that while I felt our relationship had a good chance of making it, I'd come to accept that a huge part of that was doing our own thing. He was right with me on that, not freaked out at all. I got the feeling he was relieved that I wasn't, like, falling apart at the idea of him leaving. Things felt weirdly mature, like we'd grown up. Like I'd grown up.

We made the most of the summer, taking road trips to places like Key West and Panama City. As always, my days were filled with either work or friends, and my nights were good times and bonfires, often watching the sunrise at the beach. My parents had really loosened the reins, and it felt good to be deserving of their trust.

Garrett was heading back to Miami in the middle of August. He had a new off-campus apartment and different roommates than the year before so he wanted to settle in before classes resumed.

Feeling sappy and sentimental, I baked a crap-load of cookies and assembled a back to school care package for him the day before he left. It was full of items both novel and practical.

"Where am I going to fit this?" he chuckled, holding up the ginormous canister of hot chocolate I'd found at Target.

"I can send it to you," I offered, eyeing his already-packed car.

"I'm sure I can find space," he muttered, shoving it into the backseat for the time being.

He wrapped me in his arms, sighing. "I think we're going to be okay."

"I know we will. And anyway, you're not going overseas… not yet."

"You know what I mean."

I nodded, tiptoeing to kiss his chin. "I do."

We stayed that way for a minute, hugging and swaying in his driveway.

His stomach growled loudly, making us both smile.

I pulled away first, patting his belly. "I'm hungry too. Moe's?"

"Sounds like a plan," he agreed, tugging my ponytail. "Let's take my mom's car though."

He ran back inside to get the car keys and we left.

Typical of August, the heat and humidity were stifling. The sun was currently hidden behind a mask of dark, muggy clouds, but it was still hot. Mrs. Kelly's car had the worst a/c ever, and after waiting for more than five minutes for it to cool down I rolled down the window.

"Did you bring your iPod?" I asked.

He shot me a look. "Do you have any idea how old this car is? Even the tape deck's shot."

"Ugh, right," I mumbled, noting the decrepit state of the stereo. The radio still worked, though, so I flipped idly through the stations, searching for something decent.

"Ah, I love this song!" I gasped, turning up the volume.

Garrett smiled at me sideways, shaking his head as I started to sing.

It was an obnoxiously peppy tune, the sort of garbage that Alice and I would sing secretly in her bedroom. Come to think of it, we had done that, thousands of times.

I was still singing when we hit US-1, lost in my own little pop-star universe.

Garrett hit a red light and stopped, drumming his fingers impatiently on the wheel.

A car pulled up in the next lane and I peeked surreptitiously to see if they were watching me make a fool of myself as I sang. I was always paranoid about other drivers watching me. They never were.

Unfortunately, that car's windows were up, and tinted, so I couldn't tell. It was a really nice car, though, a Camaro. One of the brand new ones, a gorgeous, gun-metal-grey. It reminded me of rain, of stormy days.

As soon as I thought it, rain drops began to speckle the windshield.

I glanced up at the light, wondering what was taking so long. Garrett's phone rang, and he turned the radio down to answer it.

Sighing inwardly I glanced back at the Camaro, noticing the driver had rolled his window down.

He was looking at me.

My heart stopped.

Edward.

thanks for the reviews and PMs last chapter, guys. i know it's stretching our comfort zones but dammit, we can do this. and look. loverboy is back.

happy thanksgiving to those of you in the states. i'm making a snickers pie to bring to the in-laws' feast. mm. xoxo

songs:

Stolen - Dashboard Confessional

I Get My Beat With Yoou - Richard Ashcroft

A Slow Dance - Explosions in the Sky