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DISCLAIMER: Naruto is property of Kishimoto©
WARNINGS:this contains male pregnancy or mpreg and NO yaoi. Heterosexual couples only.
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CHAPTER 13: Cat out of the bag
...
"I feel like I turned north and gone to the Land of Fangs instead…" Oonki griped. He continued to complain under his breath about how the cold made his bones ached but his pride would not allow him to take one of the many electric blankets available. "When I told you to "show us how it's done" I've never imagined this!"
Minato's lips twitched. "Is that a compliment, Tsuchikage?" he asked before taking sip of his hot chocolate. Normally the hot beverage would have been coffee, but alas, Rin wouldn't let him near the coffee pot. She allowed ramen only because he could eat it without blowing chunks but Minato could not negotiate his caffeine fix.
Onoki scoffed. Turning away so his face couldn't be seen, he snipped, "Take it as you like, Hokage!"
A soft chuckle emanated from Minato. "I'll take it as a compliment then, thanks" He replied. Minato lifted his nordic blue eyes to view the impressive ice carven surrounding them.
"Aaaa-aaachoo!" Cain, one of the Raikage's guards, sneezed before wiping his nose on the back of his sleeve. "Dang its cold, even in the upper part of this tower!"
The Raikage leaned forward in his heated chair so he could see the surveillance screen more clearly. Currently the Kages were waiting the arrival of the first twelve teams at the Tower located in the center of the Forest of Death. It had taken three days in total much to Oonki and the Kazekage's displeasure. The desert Kage fared even worse than the old man since he was not used to cold weather at all.
Several cases of frostbite were the worst of the injuries among the chunin-wannabes. One death occurred but it was unrelated to the environment. Turning the forest of death into a frozen wasteland for the survival exam was considered genius. However it was actually a two for one event; one, the Leaf-nins froze the forest in order to kill off a vicious race of parasitic slugs that had been multiplying faster than rabbits in the lagoons. The second reason was rather comical; Minato wanted an escape from the mid-summer's heat.
Minato was in his office a week ago with several fans blowing on him at once. Minato could take the heat but the humility was unreal. His shirt clung to him like a sticky wrapper. Minato had to remove his Hokage cloak and his jounin jacket when Saku approached him with an idea. Minato looked upon the man as if he was an angel sent from heaven.
"You get a 10 percent raise"
After the finalists have reached the tower. They were able to rest and prepare for their final matches for 3 days. On the fourth day, the final stage of the exam consisted of 1 on 1 Battles in which the winner becomes a chunin. There was at least one newly appointed chunin from every nation. After the successful completion of the third part of the chuunin exam, Minato and his staff decided that a small celebration would be hospitable. So a party was given for the upper management and jounins while ironically leaving out the chunins during the chunin exam as Minato sheepishly noted. They made an exception and allowed the participants to partake in the festivities as well but it remained exclusively for Jounins.
Minato raised his wine glass. Unlike everyone else in the room he had apple cider instead. "For the first time in history our countries have come together to compete in a fair and diplomatic international chunin exam! To commemorate this success a feast will be prepared tonight! Congratulations!"
The Raikage didn't miss a beat. He squinted at his wine glass suspiciously. "And why is the Hokage not drinking this?" Ay whispered.
"It's safe, Raikage-sama" Cain whispered back. "I tested it"
After socializing with the Kages, the participants and everyone in between Minato excused himself for the night.
Meanwhile in secret base set up in the forest. About a mile and quarter away from the village, the leader of the Hot Springs Ninjas, the Steam Shadow, was meeting in private with the head ANBU OPS from the Mist. His code name was Red Snapper.
"Did they drink the wine?"
The masked man nodded. "Yes Yugekage"
"Including the Hokage?" He specified.
"Unfortunately, no" Red Snapper replied. Respectfully he advised, "Because of this, Yugekage-sama, you will have to adjust you strategies—"
"No matter" The Yugekage waved him off. "When we set out tomorrow at 700 hours, his fate will be the same regardless"
Red Snapper's eyes narrowed. "Please do not get cocky. Leaf Ninja are not pushovers. Even with this handicap they can still prevail against you" he warned.
"Don't underestimate the power of the Hot Springs" The Yugekage retorted.
"Of course not" Red Snapper replied coolly. "Underestimating and overestimating can lead to one's downfall, Yugekage-sama" Red Snapper stood up. "That's it for the Mist. On behalf of the Mizukage, we hope you will succeed in your ambitions" Before the Yugekage's eyes, the agent flickered before vanishing from sight.
The Yugekage narrowed his eyes thoughtfully at the place where his so-called ally disappeared. He always wondered why the Mist volunteered to help the Hot Springs with this operation. At first Yugekage accepted the help with cautious glee since their lack of manpower concerned him a bit. A small ANBU team from the Mist could do nothing to help with an invasion that required might in numbers. However who needed numbers when the enemy would be incapacitated?
To be honest the Mist had done more than enough to help them succeed. The Yugekage was still suspicious though. Mist, like all the other great nations did nothing for nothing. He figured the Mist wanted to use the invasion as a distraction while they used a small group to raid something of value in the midst of confusion and warfare. Quite clever the Yugekage had to admit. Whatever the reason for their temporary alliance, it would surely benefit them both. An eager smirk formed on the Yugekage's lips.
...
The next day nearing 700 in the wee hours of the morning. A one-eyed crotchety old man was already wide awake. In fact he did not sleep a wink that night. He wouldn't dare to. 'Today is the day'. Danzo thought. 'Those fools… Drinking and merry-making when our enemies surround us!' He knew Hot Springs were coming but it was none of his concern at the moment. He coldly glared down at his ROOT agent knelling before him. Danzo said, "You disappoint me…you still haven't found the identity of the Namikazes' surrogate mother?"
"No sir but then we tried a different approach"
"Explain."
"In this situation, it's perhaps better to show…Here, Danzo-sama" the agent pulled out a thick envelope from his breast pocket. Danzo raised an eyebrow but took it and opened it. Photographs fell into the palm of his hands and copies of private medical files. In a single glance, Danzo's lone eye nearly popped out of its socket. That WAS ridiculous! Not to mention reckless!
At seeing his master's reaction, the agent spoke up, "We managed to secure the information from the Hokage's former student, Rin's apartment"
"This is…" for the first time in decades, Danzo had been shocked into silence. His face paled and then soured to green. "The…The council will hear of this! I will get him impeached for this!" His lone eye crinkled around the edges with hideous glee. "Well done"
An explosion suddenly went off in the distance. The blast was so forceful that it rocked the foundation located deep within the earth. Danzo jerked. "What was that?"
"The invasion is happening now. The village of the Hot Springs is attacking, Danzo-sama. What are we to do?"
"Nothing" Danzo smirked. "Let's see how our Hokage-sama and his drunken lackeys handle it"
When Minato awoke the next morning, the first thing he noticed was the heavenly scent of lilac. Minato grinned childishly as he inhaled deeper. Without opening his eyes Minato knew it was his wife's silky red hair. Kushina's hair always smelled so soothing. He scooted closer to nuzzle his mate when that annoying alarm clock went off.
Stiffing a groan Minato slammed his hand on the machine and reluctantly rolled out of bed. Emphasis on rolled. With another groan, Putting on his house robe he headed downstairs to the kitchen. Muffling some yawns he started to prepare breakfast when he started to feel a little peckish. Minato quickly retrieved some oreo cookies from the canister on the counter and popped them into his eager mouth. Minato never had a sweet tooth but lately he had been finding the chocolate cookie with its gooey and sugary frosting quite addictive.
"I see yoooou Minato!" Kushina teased him. She was leaning against the door frame watching her husband. Minato shamelessly stuffed another oreo into his mouth much to his wife's amusement. Suddenly the doorbell ranged frantically. Kushina raised her eyebrow. "Who can that be this time in the morning?"
Minato hastily wiped his mouth before activating his henge and answering the door.
"Hokage-sama!" Mai Hatsu cried as soon as Minato cracked the door open. "The Hot-Springs Village is attacking our borders!"
"What!?" Minato asked incredulously, accidentally spraying Mai with cookie crumbs much to his embarrassment.
"WHAT DID SHE SAY?" Kushina exclaimed. The redhead came running to the door and managed to catch the end of Mai's statement. She clumsily tied her house robe together. "You said we're under attack?!"
"Yes! T-The Yugekage himself is confronting our guard teams in Greenwood forest as we speak!" Mai explained. She visibly jerked when a sudden explosion rumbled in the distance.
Minato swore mentally. Of ALL the times to invade the leaf it had to be when he was 7 months pregnant. Minato knew he wasn't helpless, far from it, but he was still at a disadvantage. Even with the Hiraishin, his speed had significantly slowed down due to obvious reasons and his skills have gotten dull as well. Minato had been so tired lately that he hadn't been training enough to help keep up his stamina. Plus, most of his chakra was being focused to the baby in his belly which left him with little to spare.
"Hokage-sama!" Mai said again, calling Minato out of his thoughts. "What are your orders?"
Minato nodded. Calmly he ordered, "Dispatch teams. Call for a complete evacuation for civilians!" Pregnant or not, he was still Konoha's Hokage and the Yellow Flash. Minato announced, "I will go to the front! Have the jounins meet me there!"
Kushina was alarmed at the idea of Minato fighting in his condition. "Minato-"
"Kushina-koi, please" Minato silenced her gently but sternly.
"Um…Sir…about that…ahhha.…the jounin…they are…" Mai hesitated. She motioned with her hands. "Um how should I say this… they're all um…drunk?"
Minato froze. "…What?"
Kushina stared at the woman in disbelief. "Mai, you mean from yesterday's party? I can see a few still tipsy but how in blazes can they all be drunk now?" She demanded.
"Well normally you're right but in the bottles…the shipment we received from the Land of Grain was contaminated with the crouching doom powder!"
Kushina paled. "That kami forbidden herb?! How did that happen?!" She asked, truly freaked out. At seeing his wife's reaction, it unsettled Minato. Usually it was him who was knowledgeable about these types of things however botany wasn't one of them. "And what does that powder do?" Minato asked.
"It delays the body's ability to digest alcohol sir…it prevents oxidation and accumulates alcohol's effects in the blood stream" Mai explained. "What makes the crouching doom power so dangerous is that it's odorless, tasteless and doesn't work until 8 hours later when it's least expected. That's when it leaves their victims even in a worse, non-ending drunken state!"
"Do the effects wear off eventually?" Minato asked.
"Yes sir but it takes days—"
"DAYS?!" The redhead shrieked
Mai nodded despairingly. "As you can see…" Mai Hatsu trailed as she looked behind her. As on queue Rin came on the porch trying to lead a staggering jounin and failing. The poor chump was running in the siding of the house and almost tripping over his own feet.
Minato's eyebrows shot up in alarm. "Kakashi!?"
Kakashi appeared to be intoxicated almost into a stupor. Kakashi giggled at Rin with a flushed face. He didn't even lower his facemask as he cuffed his mouth around a liquor bottle and drank. Half of it was going in his mouth, the rest on his mask.
"Kakashi, that's like the fifth bottle!" Rin shrieked as she snatched the bottle from him.
"Awww…can I—hic—have it back? Hic!"
"NO! DAMN IT KAKASHI! Where are you getting this bottles from anyway?!"
"My ass" Kakashi replied.
"It gets worse Hokage-sama" Mai Hatsu raised her voice to be heard over the noise in the background. "Whoever drinks the wine becomes hopelessly addicted to it!" From the corner of his eye, Minato could see Kakashi pull out yet ANOTHER bottle from somewhere and was drinking it down. Rin was going into a rage tying to confiscate it as well.
"RIINNNNNN!" Kakashi whined when Rin finally got all his bottles. It turns out that Kakashi was telling the truth. He had stored the liquor in a storage seal located in his back pouch. Rin deactivated the seal before ripping it off. Kakashi grabbed onto her legs and rubbed against them pleadingly. Giving her big watery eyes; he whined shamelessly like a dog.
"Oh stop it! I'm not giving back your wine stash!" Rin growled. She sighed. "You know I always thought Kakashi hugging on me would be sweet… but it's actually so damn annoying!" She glared down at the sliver teen. "Get off me, Kakashi!" Rin tried to shake the boy off her leg but he wouldn't let go. "Seriously let go, you're creeping me out!"
"You feel nice…and smell nice tooooooo!" Kakashi giggled with a wide, perverted smile. That innocent rubbing was starting to turn into humping much to horror of everyone present.
"I knew he was closet pervert but this takes the cake!" Kushina snorted. She then turned a suspicious eye toward her husband. "Minato…is there something you want to tell me?"
"W-What? No! Why would I have anything to do with this?"
"Well you ARE his sensei-"
"I can't be held responsible for Kakashi!"
"And that perverted Jiraiya was YOUR mentor hmmm…" Somewhere in the Land of Beaches Jiraiya sneezed. "…come to think about it you said his books were your favorite. All Jiraiya-sama writes are those erotic porn novels!" Kushina glare turned deadly.
"K-KUSHINA! Now isn't the time for this!"
Rin twitched. She could barely contain herself from beating down her teammate but it wasn't fair to hit a happy drunk. Enduring a happy, clingy drunk was the right thing to do. "Kakashi I am warning you—"
"You know Rin…." Kakashi grinned up at her with a big predatory smile. "We should act out page 98…hehehehehehe….with these long legs you are perfect for it—" A loud crunch what heard as Rin punched Kakashi out like a light. He crumbled to the floor making unintelligent mumbles from the ground.
"I've reached my limit!" Rin justified.
"I don't blame, you. You've got more patience than me" Kushina complimented her.
Minato swore vocally this time as he imagined that well over half of his shinobi forces were in a similar state as Kakashi. Minato took a deep breath. Trying to stay levelheaded, he asked this time, "How many abled shinobi do we have?"
"Roughly three quarters of our force is um…. incapacitated" Mai Hatsu answered carefully. "Even Sarutobi-sama…I'm sure you've noticed his absence…I would have bought him to your office but he fared worse than young Hakate here…Biwako is trying to sober him up but it's not going well"
Minato wilted. This was bad; this was really, really, really bad!
"Excluding our jounins, who are currently on missions outside the village, we have roughly only 14 percent of jounin ranks available for combat. The rest are chuunin and genin" Mai Hatsu finished explaining.
Minato dropped his head into his hands. "Oh kami…Can our allies help?" He asked next.
Rin snorted. "They are just as bad! What's even worse is that they're trying to blame their drunken states on us!" she complained. "Right, as if we would intoxicate our own forces just to be handicapped for an unperceived invasion the very next day!" Rin ranted sarcastically.
"Calm down, Rin-chan!" Mai Hatsu cautioned. The secretary turned to Minato expectantly "Hokage-sama, what are your orders?" She asked. Kushina and Rin waited for his answer as well. Kushina was privately scared it would be an answer she didn't want to hear.
Minato nodded. Calmly he ordered, "We are at war. Let the senior academy students complete the evacuation for civilians. I will need every chunin and genin and any able bodied jounin ready for combat!" Pregnant or not, he was still Konoha's Hokage and the Yellow Flash. Minato announced, "I will go to the front!"
Rin's jaw dropped. "Sensei!"
"Rin, I need you to report to the medical corps" Minato told her. "You may have to lead if your superiors are incapacitated as well"
Rin's bottom lip quivered. "But…" she trailed. 'You can't go out there! What about you? What about the baby?!' was the unspoken cry.
"That's an order" Minato stated firmly. He looked directly in her eyes. "…And don't worry about me, I will be extra careful, okay?" He assured her.
Rin bit her lip reluctantly. "A-Alright…Meanwhile I'll do my best to treat the wounded while trying to find a way of sobering up these jounins!" she promised in a determined voice. Minato smiled proudly at her. Minato and Kushina retreated inside their homes to prepare for combat.
'I hope you will be okay sensei—WHAT THE!'
Several veins suddenly popped on Rin's forehead when she felt two hands snaking up her leg. She had always wanted Kakashi's attention but definitely NOT like this. "KAKASHI, I'VE TOLD YOU TO GET YOUR DAMN HANDS OFF ME!" She bellowed.
Mai Hatsu sighed wearily. "We are doomed, aren't we?" She asked to no one in particular.
…
Minato barely succeeded in zipping his jounin vest up over his engorged stomach. He paused as he ran a hand over it. The baby squirmed underneath his fingertips. "Kushina, listen, I—"
"Don't worry, Koi, I know you're a big boy who can handle himself…" Kushina tied her blue Konoha headband to her forehead. "And I'm a big girl who can rip those Hot Spring Ninjas a new one!" She turned to him with a determined smile. "You make sure to be careful. You're carrying our precious legacy after all!"
Minato returned Kushina's confident smile with a relieved one. "Thanks koi, I'll make sure to remember that." In a flash he was gone. That's when a worried frown appeared on the redhead's face. Kushina didn't want Minato to go to the front lines but there wasn't much she could do about it at this point. Konoha needed it's Hokage now.
...
While the academy students helped evacuate the civilians, the genin and the chunins rushed into combat. Among those chunin were Guy, Asuma and Kurenai. "I can't believe they're sending us chunins to the front!" Asuma cheered. "Finally we get some action!"
"You do realize we are the Leaf's last resort, don't you?" Kurenai said, trying to pop Asuma's ego before it got too big. "The jounins are intoxicated and—"
"Who cares! We'll show Hokage-sama we're the real deal and may even get promoted!" Asuma said.
"YOSH! That's the spirit Asuma-kun!" Guy exclaimed as he pumped his fist into the air.
Kurenai rolled her eyes. 'Boys…' she snorted. "…Still I can't believe how these Hot Springs-nin infiltrated the city like this! At this rate we may be unable to confront them at the gate, let alone back up the Hokage in the forest!"
"We'll do what we can and then support the troops on the outer scale!" Asuma reasoned.
"Right! Guess we have to settle for this!" Guy jumped right down into the town square and began taking the enemy-nin head on. Asuma groaned at Guy's straightforwardness. "Geeze, he's so impetuous!" Asuma readied his chakra blades before jumping down to support Guy.
"He's not the only one…" Kurenai mumbled to herself. She hung back for a moment as she prepared a genjutsu to help confuse the enemy below.
…
Minato managed to arrive at the outskirts of the village quickly. There were several hundreds of enemy troops stationed there but they had yet to advance. They seemed to be covered in some strange sort of barrier; almost like being in a large green foam bubble or a transparent cocoon. Minato spotted one of his top jounin who were actually able to stand, Shikaku Nara. Landing down next to the Nara he called out, "Shikaku! What's the verdict?
"We're having some problems. They had set up this area barrier in the middle of our fight. We're currently trying to break it back down, Minato-sama—urgg…" Shikaku grimaced suddenly. He clutched his head.
"Are you are suffering from the hangover?" Minato asked concerned.
"I'm…" Shikaku twitched. "I'm m-managing, Minato, don't worry….I… I only drank a sip last night. Not a whole glass or anything which is probably the only reason why I'm still standing!"
Minato nodded. "Wait here, Shikaku" Minato wasn't sure how he was going to deactivate the barrier but walked forward anyway. As he got closer a small hole opened for him. Minato hesitated for a moment before he moved forward to walk in until Shikaku grabbed him by his shoulder. "I advise against it!" the Nara whispered franticly.
"I know it's a trap but I'll improvise" Minato promised.
Shikaku sighed as he reluctantly let Minato go. "…Be careful, Minato-sama"
Minato gave Shikaku a comforting smile before entering the barrier alone. Not unexpectedly the entrance closed up after him. Minato could feel hundreds of eyes watching his every moment as he walked farther and farther in. 'Yes, come Fourth Hokage' The Hot Springs shinobi thought. 'We will put an end to your precious Hiraishin. Come further in if you dare!'
Bright fluorescent lights were the first thing Kakashi saw. He squint his eyes shut and let out a pain filled moan. He held his hands over his sensitive eye. Not only were his eyes hurting, his head felt like it was going to split open at any moment. "Ummmm….wha….oh kami my head!" Kakashi whined out.
Rin didn't look up from the saline bag she was changing out. "Finally back to normal, Kakashi?" She mentioned. Referring to Kakashi's shamelessly perverted behavior earlier and also to check if the young jounin was actually sobering up.
Kakashi laid back with a groan. His head was killing him. "Wh…what happened?"
"You drunk the wine at the Chuunin exam party last night" Rin explained.
Kakashi frowned. "I don't, ow…I didn't d-drink that much!"
"You didn't have to" Rin explained. "Even one sip could cause prolonged drunkenness"
"How…how is that possible?"
"Someone managed to slip a tasteless, odorless powered herb into the wine that we imported from the Land of Grain. It called the crouching doom powder. It cause those who drink it to—"
A loud bang went off in the distance.
"What was that?!"
"An invasion" Rin told him. "We're being attacked by the Hot Springs village!"
"WHAT?" Kakashi sat straight up only to wish he didn't. He moaned loudly as he clutched his throbbing head. Rin gently pushed her comrade back down. "No, Kakashi. I can't check you out at least for another hour to make sure there's no the side effects-"
"Rin if there's an invasion I must help!"
"Kakashi!" Rin snapped impatiently. "You can't help if you're a hazard! Just stay put for 30 minutes and then I'll check you out to see if you have no further side effects!" She repeated firmly. Kakashi ignored her and tried to rush out the door. Normally he was faster than Rin but not today. Rin simply held out her foot and Kakashi tumbled to the floor pathetically. Rin fumed over the stubborn man. "KAKASHI! KAMI SO HELP ME, I WILL CRIPPLE YOU JUST TO PREVENT YOU FROM LEAVING THIS HOSPITAL IN YOUR STATE!"
Kakashi whimpered from the ground. He was actually a little afraid of Rin at this point. "The only reason you could actually function half-way right now but this mixture I just created! It helps flush the powder out of your system!" Rin grabbed a tube filled with some palish green liquid. "I need to give this to the medical research team right away…" she trailed off with an irritated sigh. "...But what am I gonna do with you?"
A young patient assistant ran hastily in the room. Her name was Arata. She had just started at the Konoha Hospital as a receptionist and a patient healthcare tech just two weeks ago. Privately she wished she had majored in accounting rather than medical administration right now. "Rin-san! Please come quick, Nurse Kayo needs your assistance! She needs help with a delivery!"
"It's something wrong?"
"It's just…well it's Tsume Inuzuka…" Arata said as if that explained it all. For Rin it did. Tsume was always a handful. There were still horror stories about when she gave birth to her Daughter Hana four years ago. All those holes and claw marks in the waiting room (that were poorly concealed by paint) testified to it.
A mischievous glint lit up in Rin's eyes. Kakashi decided that he didn't like that. "Oh, Kaaakashi…" The sliver haired boy flinched. "If you want to help Konoha soooo badly then help with this list!" Rin held tightly onto Kakashi's arm as she followed Arata to the delivery rooms on the upper floor of the hospital.
The first thing that met the trio was a strangled cry along with curses. "Um…R-Rin what is this?!" Kakashi asked in a panicked tone.
Rin motioned toward the struggling Tsume. "You're assignment. Help Tsume and Nurse Kayo to deliver this baby!"
Kakashi was on the verge of freaking out. "I thought you meant an actually 'list' NOT THIS!"
"Well deal with it! I'm a little busy so help this nurse, okay?"
"Wait Rin! NOOOO!" Kakashi screamed as Rin slammed the door behind her. Rin sighed in relief. "At least he's out of my hair for a while!"
"Rin-san! Rin-san! Rin-san!"
Rin sighed. "Oh kami, what now…?" She looked up to see a medic-nin running toward her desperately. "I need your assistance! NOW!"
Rin turned to Arata and placed a tube in the young girl's hands. "Here, take this to sector 7, floor 3. Tell the medical team to multiply the solution and start giving this out to everyone who was infected by the sake" Arata nodded feverishly in understanding before dashing away with the cure. Rin meanwhile took off with the other medic.
"So what's the situation?" Rin asked as she followed after the woman.
"I really don't know!" The medic exclaimed. "He seemed fine just an hour ago and then he started having seizures!" She quickly led Rin to the room and closed the door behind them. Rin didn't know but the medic craftily locked the door as well.
Rin quickly placed on gloves. The patient was shaking in a curled ball up on a hospital bed. "Sir!" Rin exclaimed. She placed her hand on the man's shoulder and forcefully rolled him over. All that meet her was a cruel smile. "Ahh how sweet! A good little medic coming to check up on little o' me?"
Rin tried to scream but a cloth muffled her mouth and nose. Rin struggled futility in the man's bury arms before she began to feel woozy. She slumped down in his arms before fainting. "That's a good girl" the Mist-nin quickly bounded Rin's hands and feet and wrapped her mouth closed just in case she woke up before they could reach their check point.
The medic-nin who led Rin into the trap dropped her genjutsu. "Captain Red Snapper…we have secured the target!" She informed their leader through a radio behind her ear.
"Good job" The Head Mist-nin purred through the mic. He nodded his head approvingly. "Get moving, with any luck those idiot Hot Springs ninjas will make you're escape flawless. Go to the Land of Waves. We'll meet up with you at check point Beta"
"Yes sir, Rainbow Trout and Sea Serpent out!" In a flickering wisp the two Mist agents disappeared, along with Rin in tow.
Meanwhile inside the barrier Minato had eventually reached the center. A large host of Hot Spring ninjas were waiting for him. The troops however (and wisely) kept a distance back. Only one man stepped to the front to greet Minato. "Thank you for honoring us with your presence, Hokage-sama" the captain recited mockingly.
Minato wanted say that it was obvious they wanted him to stage his presence or why else would the barrier allowed him in in the first place. Instead Minato asked, "Why is the Hot Springs invading the Leaf? What do you want?"
"We are taking what is rightfully ours; you can't argue with that, can you?"
"And I will defend what is rightfully my mine" Minato threw an array of kunai around the area. The soldier didn't even seem to blink. "Just try it you fat bitch and you'll get yours!" He threatened darkly.
…Fat…?
Minato's eyebrow twitched. That guy was so dead. Minato waited, ready to pounce when the opportunity arose. The enemy made the first move but it seemed half-hearted. Minato nimbly avoided the attack. The ground beneath his feet crumbled before exploding. "Ack!" Minato yelped as nearly lost his balance. "Mines…they planted mines here" he muttered. 'That's why they were testing those mines!'
He thought back to Saku's investigations in the Land of Hot Springs. This was it. Minato scoffed. He needed several hands to indicate how many times this ploy was used against him. He ran a hand across his henge concealed belly. His speed would be significantly slower do to the weight of the baby but he had experience and the Hiraishin on his side. And so began a deadly dance.
The Hot Springs ninja jabbed a blade toward him. Minato tried to jump to the kunai that was positioned near the man's right only to realize he didn't. Minato's heart stopped. He didn't teleport. 'But why? I can't dodge it…I can't!' In slow motion the cut got him at his right arm as he tumbled forward. To add insult to injury, Minato yelped in pain when he did not land on his feet but his bottom. Laughter swirled around Minato as the Hot Springs ninjas began to mock him.
'Damn! That was close!' Minato thought panicked. '…why didn't my kunai work?!'
The Hotspring Ninja smirked. "You're catching on, Yondy?" He snickered. "Your seal doesn't work here in our dome!"
The other ninjas who had kept their distance at first now came forward. They eagerly encircled Minato like vultures encroaching on road kill. Minato realized how foolish he was to wander inside here. He knew it was a trap but not on this magnitude. Suddenly a loud crunching sound was heard followed by a visible rattle in the barrier above their heads.
"What was that?!" The captain demanded.
"Above us, captain, it's a Leaf shinobi?!" someone shouted. "How did they get pass our outer barrier?!"
Minato's head shot up to see a cloaked man running along the the edge of the rounded spear, leaving lines upon lines of explosives. Minato could recognize that mask anywhere. That orange swirl only belonged to the one person he knew…"WATCH THIS MR. LION-MANE!" Yep, it was Tobi. He was wrapping the roof of the dome as a spider would with their paralyzed their prey. When he was finished he activated the paper fuses and they all exploded at once rocking the entire dome. Small cracks appeared on the outside and crept slowly inward to the horror of the Hot Springs ninjas.
"He's going to destroy the force field!" the enemy-nin shouted franticly. "Stop him!"
Minato didn't hesitate to take advantage of his aid. If Tobi was showing him that you could break the barrier by brute force then he was going to do what he could to help. Minato focused all his chakra into his kunai before launching it. "Shuriken Shadow Clone Jutsu!" The one kunai became many as one thousand exploded onto the ceiling. The barrier cracked before shattering completely like glass.
"I am done!" the cloaked man squeaked triumphantly before receding into the ground.
"So you destroyed the barrier—we still have this!" Minato grunted in discomfort as ropes were fastened to his frame and tightened around his belly. "What?…oh, you have got to be kidding me…" This was the same lame trick Kushina used on him weeks ago. Minato blushed at the memory. He quickly teleported out of his binds to the horror of his invaders.
The Hot Springs-nin captain paled horribly. "The…the rope doesn't work…?"
Minato didn't respond. With a three prong kunai in each of his hands, Minato swung one and sliced open the man's jugular. Just as that cut had been delivered, Minato teleported to another victim and pierced him straight through the heart. He then reached for another, this time a woman, and punctured her kidneys on both sides. Minato continued the high speed slaughter from person to person within a moment to spare in between while ignoring the throbbing pain that began to rack his body. The contractions started from his back and traveled toward his lower abdominal muscles. Minato continued to attack regardless. 500 troops were stationed in this forest and he had to get rid of them all. It was his duty to.
One soldier managed to escape the chaos simply because he ran when the barrier was beginning to crack. He was hoping to meet up with a platoon as a backup. As soon as he entered the camp he yelled, "We make a full retreat! The Anti-seal Dome Jutsu failed—Ahhh! What the hell?!" he cried out as he saw his comrades were all dead. There carcasses were piled high together in a large heap.
"Going somewhere?" asked a soft, sinister voice. The man's blood ran cold. Before he could turn and face the intruder, he was grasped from behind and in one quick motion his neck was snapped. His body was dropped carelessly to the ground.
"Hm, that takes care of the enemy scouts on the outskirts…" Obito muttered to himself as he brushed off his hands. From a distance he could see the Hiraishin with its devastating power at work. "It's up to you now, Mr. Lion-mane…sensei…" Slowly he sunk back into the shadows and vanished.
Kushina estimated the distance between her and the enemy-nin. He was four meters away and closing. Hiding would do no good. A direct assault was the best option. As she was about the leap out, Mikoto grabbed her arm and forced her to her knees. "Kushina…NO!" Mikoto begged with pleading eyes, "You can't fight in your condition!"
Kushina narrowed her eyes. She may look pregnant but it was just an illusion. "I'll manage! Stay here, okay?"
"KUSHINA!" Mikoto yelled. She tried to grab her friend back again but Kushina had already leaped out of her range.
"Oh, I'm honored" the man sneered as Kushina faced him. "The first Lady of Konoha has given me an audience"
"Oh my pleasure! You have my undivided attention, Mister…?" Kushina raised an eyebrow.
"Ryou Hikaru"
"Ryou, why is the Hot Springs village attacking the Leaf?" Kushina asked.
"Because it's about time we made a name for ourselves. Plus, the Yondaime devastated us in our brief war"
"Can't blame you for that one…" Kushina agreed empathically. "It was so short and tedious that it's called 'The War That Never Was'…Shame" she shook her head.
Ryou's jaw squared. "Because of that blasted Hiraishin!" he snapped angrily. He then smiled cruelly. "Not to worry we have found a way around it"
That shocked Kushina. "Y-You what?"
"His Hiraishin will be useless! Hahahahaha! By the end of his day we will have the head of the Yondaime on a pike!"
Kushina stared at the man for a second before she started laughing out loud.
Ryou looked displeased. "What's so funny?" he spat at Kushina's attitude.
"My husband is known for more than just the Hiraishin, Ryou-san. Minato can still take on your entire nation with one hand tied behind his back!" Kushina proclaimed proudly. "And as for me, ha! I can do it with both hands tied!"
"You little arrogant little bitch…" Ryou hissed. "Don't mock the village hidden in the Hot Springs!"
"Then show me whatcha got!" Kushina said as she raced forward. "Nobody attacks my home and gets away with it! I'm not holding back!"
"Neither will I!" Ryou shouted. That is when the two Shinobi entered a very dangerous dance of speed, shuriken and kunai. Watching their opponent with a trained eagle's eye, the other waited for a moment of weakness in order to exploit it. 'Wait, something is off…' Ryou thought to himself as he watched Kushina's movements. 'This chick isn't moving like she's knocked up. She's way too fast for her condition' He deflected another kunai from the redhead. 'Not to mention her chakra isn't going to her abdomen like it normally would…' Ryou's eyes widen suddenly as a thought came to him. '…Unless…'
Ryou broke off their hand-to-hand combat and positioned himself back. "Secret Hot Springs Art: Breaker Jutsu!" he cried out.
Kushina had no time to evade. When the move came it was like a harsh shot of hot wind that shattered her henge. The illusion of her seventh month pregnant belly melted away, revealing a flat and well-toned stomach under her maternity dress. "Wha…what happened to Kushina?!" Mikoto gasped in alarm. She was still watching from afar. "Where's her baby!?" she asked horrified. She was thinking the worst. Perhaps the enemy had either killed or stolen it.
Ryou chuckled. "Well, well. Tried to play a trick on me, eh? You thought I would go easy on you if you were pregnant? Well I got news for you, sweet-cheeks: I don't show mercy to women, or children and especially not to knocked up women who engage in battle!"
"Then you are a brute!" Kushina replied. "Bakudan-kage clone!" She suddenly blackened while giving off an ominous hissing sound. A mere second later she decimated on the spot. The ends of Ryou's uniform were singed as he barely retreated in time from the blast. Kushina was not fond of her exploding clone jutsus but it was necessary in order to get the job done in a desperate time frame.
Another clone managed to get close enough to grab Ryou by his collar. "Good-bye, Ryou-san" Kushina said before exploding. In a spray of blood, Ryou's head blew off, thus ending his life. Before anyone could notice, Kushina quickly reactivated her henge. Mikoto was confused. She activated her Sharingan and saw it was nothing but an illusion. Kushina wasn't pregnant at all! When Kushina noticed that Mikoto was looking at her with the sharingan she cursed.
Quickly grabbing her friend by the shoulders, Kushina pleaded. "Please, don't tell anyone what you had seen!"
"Kushina…" Mikoto was still a little bit overwhelmed. "Where…where's your baby?" she asked.
Kushina's eyes softened. "Don't worry, he's safe…now please promise me you will not tell anyone what you saw"
"…Okay but-"
"Thanks!" Kushina said, cutting the brunette off and more importantly, successfully ending the conversation.
The Raikage groaned. He along with the other Kages was currently in the overcrowded emergency room at Konoha hospital experiencing the worse hangover of their lives. "I swear…I'm gonna kick Minato's ass for this!" he vowed. Thanks to that 'cure' the Konoha medics were injecting into his bloodstream he actually could see straight again! For good reason he had very reluctantly accepted it.
Meanwhile three floors up in the same hospital…. The wailing of a newborn baby pierced the air.
"Would you like to cut the cord, Daddy?" Nurse Kakyo offered.
"NO! I'm not the father!" Kakashi exclaimed quickly.
"Oh darling how could say such a thing? He even has your eyes!" Tsume teased. She held out her newborn to him. The baby boy was wide awake and cooing at Kakashi. He was amazingly alert for being only 3 minutes old. Lowering his guard a bit, Kakashi poked playfully at the baby.
The baby gurgled before it bit down unexpectedly on Kakashi's finger. "OUCH!" That sure hurt and the little bastard only had gums! Kakashi had always heard that Inuzuka clansmen had canine teeth. Now he certainly believed it.
Tsume howled with laughter. "Sorry about that Kakashi!" Tsume beamed down proudly at her son. "I think I'll name you Kiba! My little fang!"
"A fitting name…" Kakashi agreed as he examined his assaulted finger. "Catch you later, Tsume. I need to go now" Once Kakashi exited the room he was met with a whirlwind of uncoordinated activity. Everyone were scampering around like crazy.
Kakashi managed to spot that receptionist from earlier. The poor girl was running on all cylinders as she ran from side to side, checking patients in, checking patients out, running errands for the busier medic-nins and medical staff. Kakashi caught her by her shoulders. "Hey! Do you know where's R-Rin?"
The Arata shook her head. "I don't know. She went off with some medic-nin earlier concerning an emergency!" She explained quickly before resuming her mad dashes.
"Oh…" Kakashi wasn't alarmed. There was an invasion after all. Rin was probably busy somewhere attending to the wounded. Kakashi quickly nodded his thanks before exiting the crowded medical facility. His new objective was to seek out a Leaf commander for orders. Instead he ran into the chunins Guy, Asuma and Kurenai.
When the barrier had dissipated he ran in immediately. Shikaku panted as he ran, his legs wobbled slightly and his head was pounding but he kept going. The metallic scent of blood misted the air and entered his mouth as he inhaled. The taste became stronger the closer he got. When he arrived, he found the scene littered with bodies. "Hokage-sama!" he yelled. No reply. He prayed Minato was not among the corpses. "Hokage-sama!" Shikaku cried again. "Minato! Answer me, Minato-sama!"
"I am here" The blonde Yondaime stepped out of the woods looking a little worse for wear.
"Oh, Hokage-sama! Thank—" Blood sprayed when a knife was driven right through Minato from behind. "MINATO!" As he writhed to death, he transformed back into a hot springs ninja. Standing behind him was the real Minato. For being a seasoned Jounin, Shikaku condemned himself for such an amateur mistake. "Minato-sama…thanks"
With a grunt, Minato tossed the body aside. "That's the last of them I think. This was the main army but I think some riff raff are probably in the city"
Shikaku nodded his head. "We'll get right on it, Hokage-sama" he promised.
Minato was about to take a step forward but cringed as a shooting pain shoot up through his belly. Minato groaned loudly as he clutched his stomach. Once the adrenaline wore off, the pain was unlike anything he had ever felt before. He had overdone it… big time! Minato even entertained the possibility that he might be going into premature labor. His face shinned with sweat and began to drip off his brow. Minato dropped to his knees still cradling his belly.
"Minato!" Shikaku ran over to him. "Hokage-sama! Did he wound you in any way!?" Shikaku said worriedly.
"Shi…Shikaku get-" Minato paused and hissed. "…get me a midwife, now!" he ordered through clenched teeth.
Shikaku was confused. A doctor, yes, but why a midwife specifically? "…Why a midwife?" he asked aloud.
"Just…just go!" Minato snapped but then he gasped. "M-My henge is…oh no!" He formed a hand sign in a desperate attempt to hold it in place but it was useless. He had lost too much chakra in the previous battle to even hold the genjutsu correctly.
Shikaku Nara was known to be a laidback level-headed man but today that reputation went out the door when he saw his leader release a strong genjutsu and produced a heavy, protruding pregnant belly. "WHOA!" Shikaku shouted in surprised. Easing back he muttered, "No…way!"
"I…I think I'm going into labor!" Minato hissed through the pain.
Shikaku was now on the verge of pissing in his pants. "Please…please say you're shitting me…" he begged.
Minato growled impatiently. Why was Shikaku not getting help? "No shit…AHH SHIT!" he cried as another wave of pain hit him.
"H-Hokage-sama!" Shikaku shouted in alarm. "Breathe! Sit down! Sit back! It's not coming now is it—" Minato's abrupt scream answered his question. "HELP! SOMEONE GET A FREAKING MIDWIFE NOW!" Shikaku was now running like a chicken with its head cut off.
Minato could have laughed if he wasn't in so much pain.
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TBC
Next chapter: "Descend of the pregnant Hokage"
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Chosenmibhar: sorry if this chapter was not well written. I basically combined two chapters into one and I apologize in advance for any spelling/grammar mistakes. I seriously can't believe how time just flew since my last update… I feel like I don't have time for anything anymore but I really want to finish this story. BTW Naruto chapter 629 really threw me off. I swear all Rin is good for is being kidnapped! Damn you Kishimoto!
On the bright-side Kushina gets a fight scene this chapter! Yay!
You know that I was actually disappointed with the 'Road to Ninja' movie. I didn't watch it because of the character flip flops (whoopeedo. I've read a fanfic YEARS ago with a very similar plot…And it was better written than the movie! anyway…) I watched it for Minato and Kushina only to be disappointed. It was said that Naruto got his personality and ninjutsu from his mother so I was expecting a cool fight scene from Kushina only to be disappointed. She gets acid burn from a bubble and Minato has to step up to save the day as usual…huge disappointment…FYI I'm not a feminist but its ridiculous how Kishimoto unintentionally undermines his female characters!
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