A/N – Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the warm reviews. I am thrilled Chapter 13 stirred some heavy emotions. We're getting down to the end of the holidays as time is progressing in Texas. This chapter delves into a lot of loose ends. I hope you enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of The Big Bang Theory. This is for entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement intended.

~Chapter 14~

"…Because what's worse than knowing you want something, besides knowing you can never have it?"

― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment

Amy felt warm fingertips caressing the skin of her leg. The sensual, deliberate touches sweeping higher and higher until they reached the delicate area behind her knee. She arched her back, allowing more space for the exploration to continue. The tender movements prompted her to sigh, longing for the touches to grow bolder. But they didn't.

Slowly…so slowly, they trailed back and forth. Awakening something inside of her that she'd previously thought was dead.

The need to be touched. To be understood. To be accepted. To be desired…

"Please," She sighed, her head rolling into her pillow as she turned sideways, allowing the hand that had given her leg such blissful attention free reign to now focus on her thigh. Her hip. Her side. The side of her breast. Sweeping down her back to glide over her backside, but not stopping to lay claim there.

Amy sobbed in frustration as another hand joined the first, touching her with gossamer delicacy.

"Please…" She repeated, her voice sounding pained and weak.

Oh…this was never meant to happen to her. This all-consuming fear of wanting something so badly that you would sell your soul for it. She was a Scientist. She was cool. Calculating. Level-headed.

Strip all of that away, Amanda. And who are you, really? Her inner voice challenged her, dragging her into a reality that she didn't want to face.

She was only a woman. And she had been running from herself forever. She was so tired of running. So incredibly tired of being alone.

She craved love. She craved touch. She craved him.

"I need you…" She murmured, her body breaking out in a cold sweat as one of the hands teasing her finally took pity on her pleas.

"Anything…anything you need," A soft voice whispered back, cupping her soft flesh and teasing her with unrelenting gentleness. Its fingers brushing over her hardening nipple as it learned her weakness.

"Oh..." She moaned, her body beginning to tingle from head to toe as the caresses grew firmer.

Warm lips took over from warm hands, kissing a path down her neck towards the small of her back as her body rolled over to give access. The hands never stopped their momentum, though, sliding under her garment to raise it from her parched and shaking skin. Hot lips met hot skin as she felt herself cooling under the effects of being disrobed.

"Sheldon..." Amy moaned, feeling his mouth on the sensitive flesh of her tummy. His wet tongue trailing its way around her sensitive navel. Trailing upwards to swirl around a hardened bud before taking it in his mouth.

"Delicious…" The voice echoed, bouncing off of Amy's eardrums as she ground her head into the pillow trying to stay in the moment. All could be lost is she allowed herself to open her eyes. And she needed him to continue. The jolt she felt as he sucked gently on her flesh had her seeing stars.

Suddenly those warm lips abandoned the mystique of her breast and trailed up to her mouth, taking her in a fierce kiss that left her breathless. She tried to catch her breath, helpless to fight against the feeling of suffocation rising in her lungs. It wasn't fear that he would continue. It was fear that he would stop.

She closed her eyes tightly, reaching out to clutch his head and run her hands through his soft hair.

All she felt was air. The warmth was gone. The heat was gone. Everything…gone.

Don't leave me… She heard herself yelling down a long tunnel, opening her eyes just in time to see Sheldon's face fading from view.

Amy jerked awake, the stirrings of arousal still fresh in her mind and coursing through her body. Her face tingled as she reached up and touched her lips, still feeling Sheldon's delicate yet passionate kiss. She lay there panting, the erotic yet disturbing dream still fresh in her mind.

Don't leave me…why on Earth would she say that to him? He was right here, after all. In the next room.

Suddenly, everything made sense to Amy as the vestiges of sleep fell away. She wasn't talking about Sheldon leaving her in the literal sense. It was in the emotional sense in which she feared. After last night, and what happened on the couch, she was more confused than ever.

She looked around the bedroom in disorientation. Chaucer was nowhere to be found, and she jumped up in a panic.

What time was it, anyway? She wondered in a haze, throwing on her robe hastily. She was about to fling open the bedroom door when she spotted a note on the bed next to her pillow. Staring at it dumbly for a moment, she finally went to retrieve it and felt her heart racing as she noticed Sheldon's elegant handwriting.

Good morning, Amy. Please forgive my intrusion into your room this morning. I would normally never enter into a lady's room unannounced. Chaucer was crying very early to go out, and I cautiously popped my head in to make sure you both were alright. You were sound asleep. I hope you are not offended that I took him for a walk, as I did not want him to wake you, especially since he was so insistent. Please sleep as long as you'd like. Harvey will be picking us up at 12 pm sharp on his sailboat. Please remember to dress warmly. I made blueberry muffins this morning if you are hungry.

Sheldon. X

Amy read and reread the note three times. He had come into her room. Had he heard her dream? Had he heard her crying out his name?

Amy sighed, rubbing her temple.

Oh, God…what would she do if he had heard her? She wondered frantically, feeling her face heat up.

It took Amy the better part of the night to calm down after the incident on the couch with Sheldon. She found that she couldn't even meet his gaze on the walk back from the lake, and when they reached the cottage she could only stand numbly and look somewhere beyond his shoulder as she muttered out a hasty 'goodnight'.

He returned it with an equally distracted 'goodnight', she noticed, the pair of them retreating to their respective bedrooms.

After escaping to her room as quickly as she could, she slammed her door and fell to the floor clumsily.

"I…"She murmured, not sure what it was she was trying to say.

I can't believe this happened?

I want him.

I need him.

She had sat there on the floor, Chaucer sitting pretty next to her and just staring at her in confusion. He'd seen his mistress act strangely before, but never to this degree.

Amy spent the night tossing and turning, the feeling of Sheldon's solid body pinning her down gently and his gentle fingertip sliding along the neckline of her sweater sending her into hyper drive. She had wanted him to peek. She had wanted him to do more than peek. She had wanted him to touch.

To claim.

And after watching that Naomi drape herself all over him like a suit, she knew that she had wanted to claim him, too.

She'd never been jealous before. She never cared about a man, other than Drew, and that was innocent. To know that she had these dormant feelings of possessiveness inside of her…the way she wanted to bare her teeth and claws to Naomi and every other woman Sheldon knew or would know frightened her. He owed her nothing. He was a free man, one whom she suspected had his choice of companions. She had better stop foisting her ideals of romantic notions upon him before she lost his friendship altogether. The last thing he probably wanted was being the object of her burgeoning love.

Amy shook her head at her predicament. Sheldon was such a mystery to her.

Yet it was there last night, in the way his behavior changed from sexy to shy, that Amy wondered just how he did that so flawlessly. He was like a chameleon; intense and provocative one moment, clueless and without guile the next. And his intellect…she knew he could sit and debate any topic with the greatest minds on Earth. Yet simple sarcasm seemed to elude him. He was such a paradox, and those idiosyncrasies only made her long to know more about him. Not less.

Now, in the glaring light of day, it became all too apparent that their little flirtatious game last night had opened the Pandora's Box to all of Amy's emotions. All of the major hitters were there, too…the good and the bad.

Love

Lust

Longing

Desire

Greed

Need

Caring

Hoping

Fear…

Amy went to the deck, throwing open the doors. The mid-morning air was brisk and cool, and she breathed it in hungrily. She needed a shower to wake up. And a nice cup of tea to calm her nerves.

She stood by the door, admiring the boats that were out on the water in the distance. She was looking forward to sailing today on Harvey's boat. It had been years since she went sailing, and it would be a wonderful time to get to know Sheldon's family further before she had to leave.

The thought, as always, left her with a heavy heart. She wondered if once gone, if it would be appropriate for her to correspond with the Cooper's. Would Sheldon mind, if she and Missy kept in touch? Or she and Mary? And having met his beloved Meemaw Rose, Amy didn't know how she could never talk to her again.

She felt embarrassed, that part of her wanted to latch onto his family since she had none of her own. Yet their kindness had touched her so deeply, and she was loathe to let that go. She would take the cues from them, and of course, Sheldon, as to whether or not that was acceptable. She didn't want to overstay her welcome, after all.

Her eyes trailed over the dock, where she saw Sheldon sitting with Chaucer. He was reading what looked to be the newspaper while Chaucer sat by his side, watching the lake with interest.

Backing up behind the door, she put her hand over her suddenly thumping heart to quell its pace. She knew he probably couldn't see her from this distance, but she didn't care. Sheldon had seen too much, already.

That was the problem.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Harvey took a deep swig of his coffee, his eyes surveying Sheldon over the rim of his mug. The boy looked troubled this morning and every time Harvey tried to start up a conversation to draw him out, Sheldon would look away towards the horizon, avoiding eye contact with the older man.

When he picked up Sheldon and Amy on the boat earlier, he noticed how quiet they both were with each other. A 180 degree change from Christmas, just two days ago, Harvey mused. They were still polite and talking to each other, but something was different. He couldn't put his finger on it, but it was there. A tension of some kind was in the air that you could slice with a knife, and not the good kind.

No, it was the kind that spoke of sadness and fear. And Harvey was oblivious as to why.

It was in the way Sheldon and Amy stood side by side on the dock, waiting until Harvey moored the boat. Their shoulders touched, but they were still as statues, barely able to look at one another. Or the way Amy's eyes followed Sheldon as he jumped on, turning back to secure Amy's hand and help her onboard. She had lost her footing and Sheldon grabbed her, setting her to rights before quickly letting her go and putting distance between them again. His face turned beet red when her arms released his back, mumbling a hasty 'thank you' to him.

Something must have occurred in the last two days to form such a shift. They didn't seem calm around each other anymore; as though they each sensed an impending doom that was descending upon them. By the time they picked up Mary and Missy, the heavy atmosphere had dissipated. But just a bit. As he was not familiar with Sheldon's mannerisms, he could only assume his aloofness meant something was not right.

Harvey was no psychologist, but he could tell that somehow in the last three weeks…Sheldon had changed. Gone was the haughty, sarcastic man who demanded Harvey take this woman and toss her out into the street. Gone was that cold veneer of uncaring and it had been replaced with a vulnerable warmth. And most importantly, gone were the looks of derision and disgust. Replaced by looks of confusion and…longing.

If Harvey had to guess what the change was, he'd have bet this boat that Sheldon had fallen in love.

Ever since he met Sheldon at Mary's house two years ago, Harvey knew there was something special about the man Mary called her 'little Shelly'. He wasn't like his older brother George, that was for sure. George was gruff and ready; a true Texan through and through. Sheldon was like a Northeast Scholar; he could quite easily see Sheldon teaching at some Ivy League school. Lord knew he had the brains. And the talent. He'd made several findings as a Theoretical Physicist, a fact that blew Mary away on a daily basis. She hemmed and hawed about how his Science clashed with her faith, but deep down, Mary was as proud as the dickens that her son was so intelligent.

Harvey had hoped the two of them could forge a friendship. After all, he had two kids of his own. He was no stranger to offering advice, or going the extra mile in someone else's shoes to see where they were coming from. But from day one, Sheldon had eschewed any kind of relationship with him.

At first, he wondered if his being the Sheriff was off putting for Sheldon. Maybe he didn't think that he was good enough for his Mother? But then the unthinkable happened, and everything became clear as to why Sheldon disliked him so much.

All too clear.

Sheldon had come to Texas for an unscheduled visit last year, finding him and his mother in a very compromising situation. He'd been mortified at having been caught out like that, in front of his girlfriend's son. He'd stayed away for weeks, not wanting to cause Mary any more grief. He knew she had her hands full trying to smooth things over with Sheldon; Harvey also knew that Sheldon had put Mary on this pedestal of virtue and watching her topple from it was traumatizing for the boy.

Mary assured Harvey that Sheldon had gotten over it. But even now, Harvey could see that he had lost something from Sheldon that day. Something he never even knew he wanted.

Sheldon's respect.

Harvey broke out of his thoughts, catching Sheldon's eye and smiling broadly.

"Ever been sailing, Sheldon?" He asked conversationally, putting down his coffee to check that the lines were secure.

Sheldon had been distracted, too busy glancing over to where Mary, Missy, and Amy were sitting at the stern, chatting animatedly.

"Hmm?" He questioned in distraction when Harvey asked him again. "I'm sorry, what did you say?" Sheldon asked quietly.

Harvey narrowed his eyes at the younger man, figuring it was best to take it slow here. He followed Sheldon's vision towards the ladies, unsurprised to find his focus on Amy.

"She's certainly a gem, that little miss. I knew it the moment I laid eyes on her, back on the day I drove out to the cottage. I had no idea what I was going to find out there. I show up, faced with the two of you madder than rabbit's caught in a huntsman's snare. I'll never forget the way she put her hands on her hips and stood up to you. You've got at least a foot on her, and watching her seethe was…well, it was entertaining," Harvey said, humor tainting his voice.

Sheldon licked his lips, nodding faintly. He would never forget that day, either. Whether he wanted to or not. It was the day his life was irrevocably changed. Opening that door, seeing her standing there with her key in hand. The way she looked at him. The way she looked through him…

"You don't have to remind me of that day. I have an eidetic memory, remember?" Sheldon asked dryly, but his tone held more sorrow than anger.

Harvey nodded.

"I can see that although it was awkward, that things turned out…okay?" Harvey ventured, tilting his head and arching a brow in Sheldon's direction.

Sheldon stared at him, knowing full well to what he was alluding to. Looking down, Sheldon blushed and tried not to give anything away.

Harvey sighed.

We'll have to come back to this. But first…

"Sheldon, while we're alone I'd like to ask you something. I know you and I haven't always been…well, close. And I don't know why. I've tried to do my best to treat you with respect. If I've done something that…bothered you, I really wish you would do me the courtesy of being honest and telling me. So that I can try to make amends." Harvey said seriously.

Sheldon felt his heartrate triple. He looked at the Sheriff with a mixture of embarrassment and weariness.

'Dear Lord…Not this,' Sheldon thought in a panic.

But as he met Harvey's expectant gaze, he knew he couldn't stave off this inevitable conversation any longer.

"Do I really have to say it?" Sheldon asked quietly, trying to make this as painless as possible.

Harvey smiled wanly.

"I think its best. That way…it'll be out in the open." Harvey said reasonably, but with trepidation in his voice.

Sheldon pursed his lips, shaking his head helplessly. He took a deep breath, blowing it out with more force than he'd thought.

"You…ravaged my mother on our family couch. That is an image I must have burned into my brain now for the rest of my life." Sheldon said, his voice harsher than he intended.

Harvey nodded in embarrassment.

"I see." He murmured, shaking his head in understanding. "I figured that this was the wall between us."

Sheldon met his eyes, and he saw true remorse staring back at him.

"Sheldon…I can imagine how hard that was for you to witness. I'm sorry. I respect your Mother and I truly love her. That was just…it happened. And neither one of us are sorry. We'd been lonely for a long time. We were finding each other more and more interesting. The hour was late, and our feelings just came out. Hasn't anything like that ever happened to you?" Harvey asked with gentle candor, praying the boy could relate to him and understand. After all, Sheldon was a grown man.

Sheldon's eyes widened in embarrassment and shock at being asked such a direct question about something so personal.

"No." He answered truthfully, looking mortified at his answer as Harvey raised his brows in surprise.

"Oh…well. Your mother is a beautiful treasure to me, Sheldon. I never want you to think that I don't respect her. I do. Very much. She's brought a joy to my life that I hadn't experienced before. My late wife and I, we weren't very good together. I never thought I'd find a lady who would care for me so deeply. She is just a Godsend." Harvey said tenderly.

Sheldon cleared his throat, his eyes suddenly tearing up. He hadn't ever heard his father speak so highly of his mother before when he was alive. It grieved Sheldon that George gave her so much grief in the end, when this man was willing to offer her the world. Sheldon always assumed it was because his father was a Texan with a thick underbelly who couldn't show emotions. Yet Harvey was no less manly; he was as Texan as the next, and a Sheriff no less.

"Is it because of you father? Are you mad because you think I'm trying to take his place?" Harvey asked gently, his face serious.

Sheldon's eyes shot to his, and Harvey could see anger there. But not towards him.

"He never had his place," Sheldon said bitterly, not answering Harvey's question directly. His eyes bore into the Sheriff's with an intensity that startled Harvey.

Those words upset Harvey, and all at once his heart softened for the man before him.

"Sheldon"-

"Look, Sheriff, the thing is…all of my life my mother instilled in me the importance of 'virtue'. No sex before marriage. No giving away the milk for free. Treating women like fragile glass. How sinful it was to have impure thoughts. You can imagine how hypocritical I found her actions to be, that…day. And I don't…fault her. Or you. I'm not a religious person. I don't buy into all of that fire and brimstone. It's just…I think part of the reason I am the way I am is due to her constant instilment in my head that sex and intimacy was somehow…something to be afraid of." He admitted, his face burning at what he'd just confessed.

Harvey narrowed his eyes, trying to piece together what Sheldon was trying to say.

"The way you are? I don't understand." Harvey said kindly.

Sheldon gave Harvey a look laced with incredulity.

"You think I'm strange. Just like everyone else I know. Because I'm…there are things about me that aren't normal. And nobody understands how difficult it is to be me. I guess part of me chose this, long ago. But another part…feels like it was chosen for me. Events shaped my life that forced me into this mindset. And now…I can't seem to break loose." He whispered.

Harvey's face fell at Sheldon's words. It seemed to him that Sheldon harbored more pain than what he lead on.

"Sheldon…you can talk to me. Man to man. I would never laugh at you or judge you. Never. I have two kids of my own, you know. A parent doesn't tease their child." Harvey said seriously.

Sheldon laughed, but there was bitterness in his tone.

"A parent shouldn't," Sheldon echoed, thinking back to his father and the way he tormented because of his quirks.

Harvey nodded solemnly.

"You're right there. They shouldn't. And if they do, the problem is theirs. Not yours. I know a little about what your daddy did to Mary and you kids. Your mama doesn't like to discuss it much, but a little has come out here and there. I know you were bullied as a child, and I know your daddy didn't prevent it. Most of those kids' fathers were his friends. He should have done something to keep you safer." Harvey said kindly.

Sheldon thought the mention of being bullied would upset him. Somehow, since meeting Amy, the pain of the past had lessened. It was by no means gone, yet he didn't feel on the verge of a panic attack every time he thought about it now.

"I…had trouble. For many years afterward. Trouble making friends. Trouble trusting people. It's been an uphill battle for me. People look at me, and they see a genius. They see a pompous know it all who has no problems. They see a man who outwardly has so much to be envied. And I guess, to avoid letting myself feel…I began to believe the lie. That I was exceptional and untouchable. That I didn't need anything or anyone. That I was fine." Sheldon murmured, his voice cracking.

Harvey gave Sheldon his full attention.

"And now?" Harvey ventured, daring to put his hand on Sheldon's shoulder. Sheldon met his gaze, and Harvey was shocked at just how miserable the younger man looked.

"Now… there is a variable. There's always a variable," Sheldon whispered.

Harvey's eyes darted over to Amy, who met his gaze suddenly. She tilted her head at Harvey as he simply looked at her, finally smiling at her before settling his attention back on Sheldon.

"Amy is the variable, isn't she? She's what changed you." Harvey stated.

Sheldon gulped, afraid to answer him and afraid not to.

"Yes." He whispered, his confession carried by the sound of the wind.

Harvey didn't know whether to laugh, cry, or smile. Mary had been so worried about her son for years. Finding love, coming out of his shell. Even as a God fearing Christian, she was reaching the point of worry about him that she wouldn't have even minded if Sheldon admitted he were gay! As long as he was alive, and feeling something. Anything. Other than being the cold and scientific robot he perceived himself to be.

He looked at Sheldon with a large smile, daring to nudge his shoulder lightly.

"And, if I may be so bold to pry…why is that not a good thing? I mean, she's a lovely girl. Intelligent as the day is long. Sweet and caring. Your Meemaw is over the moon about her, you know. All day yesterday, all she talked about was Amy this and Amy that. I think she's smitten with her. And anyone can see that young lady is sweet on you. She can't take her eyes off of you, boy. Why are you riling yourself up? You young people today make everything hard. In my day, if we wanted something, we went after it. Bingo." Harvey said light heartedly, laughing at his own joke.

Sheldon gaped at Harvey, stunned.

Amy is sweet on me?

Harvey looked back towards the ladies, raising his coffee mug in greeting. Sheldon's eyes followed, meeting Amy's with a shy smile which she returned. When he brought his attention back to Harvey, the older man was watching his with a shrewd smile.

"You can't hide it forever, Sheldon. You can't even try. The way you look at her…it's deep." Harvey said quietly.

Sheldon swallowed, trying to formulate an answer for all of this. Harvey's statement right here was the crux of his fears. What the future held, because he couldn't hide his feelings.

"The politics of romance in the workplace are not easy to navigate." Sheldon offered by explanation.

Harvey shrugged, nonplussed.

"Well, there are ways around that. You are both Professors…Scientists. Not students. You'll be in different departments. And unless you ravish her on her desk in her lab, I don't see why if you aren't discreet, things will be a problem." Harvey said, laughing humorously.

Sheldon gave Harvey a scandalous glare, appalled at the image he provoked. Harvey caught his reaction and tried to backpedal.

"I'm just kidding, Son. Calm down. You get my gist though. Right? If you're really worried about it, look into the policy. Get the facts straight before you go cheating yourself out of something that has the makings to be wonderful. You know…the way you both met is pretty unique. I wouldn't go throwing that into the fire. Something special happened here, this holiday. I think you owe it to yourself to explore what that could be." He said with wisdom.

Sheldon nodded, swallowing deeply.

"It's more than that. People will talk. People will…get in the way." He said quietly.

Harvey nodded, taking another sip of his coffee.

"Oh, I see. You've had her all to yourself here these last few weeks. You don't want to share her." He said simply.

Sheldon eyed him with confusion.

"No…not per se. It's just...I don't want anyone making a mockery of our time together." Sheldon said truthfully.

Harvey blinked, not following him.

"And why on Earth would they do that, Son? You're not the first man to fall in love with a woman, for Pete's sake!" He said in exasperation.

Sheldon lowered his eyes, ashamed. He couldn't even begin to address what Harvey just said…but there was another matter, anyway.

"I've never…I'm not…There's never been…anyone." He looked back at Harvey, helpless. He didn't know how to voice the words that would undoubtedly make him look like a loser in Harvey's eyes.

Harvey's eyes widened briefly as he tried to digest Sheldon's words. He tried to hide the shock on his face by schooling his features.

What? But…that was impossible.

This kid was a looker; that was for sure. Tall, handsome, muscular… he had his mother's smile and his Meemaw's blue eyes. Soft spoken, too. Sheldon wasn't some loudmouthed bum. He was brilliant, schooled with Southern manners, and was respectful. On top of that, he was one of the most intelligent people on Earth. Harvey was certain women were lined up to have a piece of him.

But when he stopped a moment and gave it a thought, Harvey could see that those blessings were also a curse. Sheldon was a very private person, and very shy. Perhaps his attributes were a hindrance. He tried to put himself in Sheldon's place…never having been in a relationship before, and now suddenly madly in love.

"Oh. Never?" He asked gently, trying to calm Sheldon's fears as the kid stared at him wide eyed and embarrassed.

Sheldon shook his head back and forth in shame.

"Son…that is nothing to be ashamed of. Trust me." Harvey said seriously. "I think in this day and age, it is the most admirable thing I've ever heard. If your Mama knew"-

Sheldon gaped at Harvey, aghast.

"Which she never, ever will!" Sheldon said seriously, earning a chuckle out of Harvey.

"Of course." Harvey promised. Holding up his hand in promise.

Sheldon nodded, confident the Sheriff would keep his secret.

"If daddy were alive, he would mock me until the cows came home." Sheldon said sadly.

That made Harvey angry.

"Listen here. All that business of sex making you a man? It's bull. What makes a man a man is who he is inside. His character. His love for those in his life. His integrity. Sex is something you do. It isn't who you are. I'm not in the habit of going around disrespecting the dead. But if your daddy would hold that against you or make you out to be any less than the wonderful man you have become, than he can burn for all I care." Harvey said with vigor.

Sheldon gaped at him, not knowing what to say. He hadn't had an older man defend him with anything since Pop-Pop died when Sheldon was five. To hear Harvey, a man whom he previously held contempt for saying such a fatherly thing…suddenly Sheldon felt more than ashamed at his behavior. He felt disgusted.

"Thank you, Sheriff." He said quietly.

The older man nodded, smiling at Sheldon.

Harvey took a moment to compose himself, finishing off his drink and sticking the mug under the control panel. A few minutes passed as they simply sailed, enjoying the water and the quiet. Sheldon turned to him suddenly, helpless to keep his fears to himself any longer.

"May I ask you something?" Sheldon ventured, relieved when Harvey smiled warmly.

"You can ask me anything, Dr. Cooper." He said gently.

Sheldon laughed at the formality. He supposed he deserved that.

"I don't…why would she want an inexperienced man who has spent the last thirty years afraid of his own shadow? I've never even taken a woman out on a date. I wouldn't know what to say, how to act. I would end up ruining everything. I don't want to appear weak to Amy. She is too important." He admitted quietly.

Harvey smiled, chuckling warmly as he leaned in closer to Sheldon.

"Sheldon…I've been watching that girl. First, at the cottage. Then all day at Christmas. And today. You are right. She is important. She is so intuitive to other's feelings. She's selfless. Unassuming. You wanna know what I think? I think the Heavens opened up and dropped her on your doorstep." Harvey said kindly.

Sheldon couldn't deny that prospect was very pleasing, albeit frightening.

"But that still doesn't answer my question. Why?" He asked, truly stumped.

Harvey reached out, putting his hand on Sheldon's shoulder and squeezing tightly.

"Quite possibly because she cares for you. Just as you are. Quirks and all. Who can say how humans fall in love. It's chemical. It's magical. But when it happens…good god, boy. You gotta grab it. It may never come again. And especially not as strong. Why…if I ever lost your mother now, it would kill me, Sheldon. I love her, that much." Harvey admitted.

Sheldon frowned, biting his lip in thought.

"Harvey…I want you to know something. I've never disliked you. I just…worried that you might one day get hurt in the line of duty, and…I don't want Mama to suffer again. She's been through enough. I just want her to be happy." Sheldon confessed, daring to meet Harvey's eyes.

Harvey nodded slowly, grateful for Sheldon's honesty. It was time for some of his own, now.

"Son…I love your mother. I'm not going to pull any punches and say that I don't. I want the same things that you do. I want her to be happy. Truth is, I'm turning sixty in two months. I'm taking an early retirement, because…I want to ask your Mama if she'd consent to be my wife."

Sheldon's mouth fell open in a soundless gasp as Harvey gazed at him steadily.

"You…you want to propose to her?" Sheldon asked seriously.

Harvey nodded.

"I do. I'm at the stage where I want to enjoy my life. I've been in law enforcement for forty years. I've held a good career, made a very decent pension. And now, I want to relax. I want to take Mary traveling. I want to show her the world. I would love to have your blessing, Sheldon. Because out of all you kids, you are the one who's opinion matters to her the most. And I guess…to me too." Harvey admitted.

Sheldon stared at him, shocked.

"Me? Why would you care what I think?" Sheldon asked, baffled.

"Sheldon…you have to know how much I admire you. And after our little chat here today, I admire you even more. You're a rare breed, Dr. Cooper. A true gentleman. I couldn't very well ask for your Mother's hand, if you didn't approve. I wouldn't ever ask Mary to choose between me and her children." He said respectfully.

Sheldon stared at this man he had so long held contempt for, feeling ashamed at himself. Harvey was a very honorable man; one that could offer his mother the love she deserved and never received. He realized that it was time to stop being a child and grow up. The past had held them all in its sorrowful clutches and it was time for them to break free.

Standing up, Sheldon put his germ phobia aside and held out his hand for Harvey to shake. Harvey looked at his outstretched palm, his face softening into a smile.

"Harvey…you have my blessing. I think my mother deserves better than what she had. I feel you'll give her that. I'm sorry I've made you feel like you don't belong in our family. I'm ashamed at my actions. Please…just don't hurt her." Sheldon begged, his eyes watering.

The two men shook hands, a deep understanding passing between them.

"Sheldon…I would cut off my hand before I did that." Harvey promised seriously.

Sheldon nodded, before breaking out in chuckle.

"Well…don't do that. I don't know how to steer this thing." He said fearfully, and Harvey barked out a laugh.

Across the boat, Amy watched the scene with interest. She knew something special had just occurred. Something important.

And she smiled.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Mary went to bring Harvey another coffee as he hoisted the sails. Sheldon had moved to the stern of the boat, lost in daydreams as he stared at the water with Amy by his side.

Mary frowned as her gaze shifted from Sheldon to Harvey.

"Shelly alright? What did you two talk about? I was worried." Mary admitted, sitting next to Harvey.

Harvey rolled his eyes, adjusting his baseball cap and giving his girlfriend a wink.

"Mary, you don't have to worry every time Sheldon and I talk. In fact, it was the best talk I've ever shared with a kid, including my own. So stop your frettin'." He said lovingly, his voice tender.

Mary blinked at her boyfriend like an owl.

"Really? Are you sure? Because I know my Shelly. And after what happened last year"-

Harvey waved a hand, stifling her train of thought.

"God alive, woman. We all need to get past that. I think Sheldon realizes now that we love each other. It was your home. It's not like we were out in the backseat of my cruiser in the parking lot of the 7-eleven. And, well… I think we've turned a corner here. We had a good talk. Man to Man. I think he is going to be fine. But he's going through something right now that has his heart in tatters and his brain in overdrive." Harvey said seriously.

Mary's gaze swung behind her to Amy.

"It's Amy, isn't it?" Mary asked softly. In answer, Harvey merely smiled slightly.

"Oh…I knew it. I know my Sheldon. That night of the bonfire, when Brett had left and we came upon Sheldon and Amy? I saw them holding hands. Well, more like Amy was holding his hand, trying to bring him back from whatever dark place he'd gone to. But the look on his face when he acknowledged she was there in front of him… Harvey…I have never seen my boy look at a woman like that. I nearly cried." Mary admitted, tears now beginning to fill her eyes.

Harvey nodded, pulling Mary to his side.

"Listen, Darlin'. He's confused. This is the first time in his life a woman has affected him like this. And he has a lot to consider. He's concerned about the fact they'll be working together soon. He doesn't want gossip to ruin their newfound friendship."

Mary stared at Harvey strangely.

"Gossip? When would Sheldon ever care about such a thing? He's above all of that childish nonsense." Mary said with surety.

Harvey shook his head in the negative.

"You'd think that, until you're faced with it. He's concerned that his friends will tease him. Or that the University would frown on two Professors fraternizing. And, if you ask me…I think he's worried that another Professor there would try to put the moves on her. He's just found her. He's afraid to lose her." Harvey said with sympathy.

Mary stared over at her son, examining him closely for the first time all week. Suddenly, the magnitude of Harvey's words hit home.

"Good Lord, Harvey. It's that serious? What did he tell you?" Mary asked in shock.

Harvey nodded, trying to be discreet.

"I think it is serious, yes. But do not go on to him about it. Let him be. If he needs your help, he'll ask. He's a grown man, Mary. You need to let him go. He's not that fourteen year boy that went to Germany all alone. He needs to know you don't think of him as a child still." Harvey said seriously.

Mary narrowed her eyes at her boyfriend.

"But…Sheldon"-

Harvey cut her off, waving a hand.

"Sheldon is thirty-five years old, Mary. Leave. Him. Be." He said with love, reaching out to caress her cheek with his finger.

Mary bit her lip, finally bowing to Harvey's logic. She leaned in, whispering in his ear conspiratorially.

"You're just lucky that I'm a God fearing woman. Otherwise, I'd throw you off this boat."

Harvey chuckled, shaking his head.

"I don't doubt that for a second, Miss Mary. Not one." He said tenderly.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Harvey moored the sailboat, Mary and Missy helping him secure it to the dock while Sheldon helped Amy off. Harvey took the ladies on ahead up to the cabin, while the couple lingered on the dock taking in the property with awe.

"Wow, Harvey's home is beautiful. I've never been in a real log cabin before," Amy gushed, pausing to look around and take everything in. The house was nestled into a cove that was private, complete with a huge boathouse. They walked the short distance to it and looked inside, amazed at how big it was.

"Mama told me he built it himself from the ground up. It took him two years. He had a home in town with his late wife. I guess he wanted a change, after…" He trailed off, shrugging.

Amy walked closer to Sheldon, crossing her arms. She hoped what she was about to say wouldn't upset him. But after witnessing Sheldon and Harvey's talk today, something told her it wouldn't.

"He's good for your mother, Sheldon. You know that, right?" Amy asked gently. Sheldon nodded, his eyes fixed to hers gently.

"Yes. I know it." He whispered, earning a relieved smile out of Amy. "He um…he asked me for my blessing. I think he is planning on proposing to her soon." Sheldon admitted, a blush covering his skin.

Amy's eyes lit up with joy. She walked closer to Sheldon, wanting to bask in the secret.

"Really? That's…wonderful. How do you feel about it?" Amy ventured cautiously.

Sheldon bit his lip, his eyes burning a hole through Amy's.

"I…want her to be happy. If loving Harvey is what will accomplish that, then…who am I to stand in her way?" He asked her softly.

Amy smiled tenderly at him and the way he was putting his mother's feelings first. He continued to stare at her intently, and it prompted Amy to broach the topic she'd been avoiding all day.

"Hey…are you alright? You seem very distracted today. I hope it's not about last night. I told you, everything is okay." Amy whispered gently.

Sheldon looked toward the door of the boathouse, unable to face her suddenly. It hit him all at once that they were in here alone, and there was so much ready to bubble up to the surface that he was afraid.

He'd spent the better part of the morning avoiding her until Harvey sailed in to get them. Ashamed at how weak he'd been last night, giving in to his baser urges and touching himself as he fantasized about her…it made him feel awful. Guilty. And yet…he couldn't regret it.

The act itself was…wonderful. He could almost feel her there with him, a fact that stunned and aroused him even more. What he felt awful about, was using her in that way. The living, breathing Amy was right in front of him, yet he was powerless to tell her how he felt.

When he awoke this morning, the first thing he did was reach over and grab his pillow. He pretended it was Amy, and that made him feel even worse. He was beginning to feel a dreaded weight inside of his stomach. Their time together was drawing to a swift end. And it was breaking his heart.

Chaucer had been whining to get out of Amy's room for nearly an hour. Throwing caution to the wind, he carefully opened her door to see Amy passed out cold, her blanket on the floor and her nightgown askew. Sheldon had gulped as he took in her lovely body, on display for his wandering eyes. The fabric of her hemline just skirted her upper thigh, and he struggled to do the gentlemanly thing and replace her blanket. After leaving her a note and hightailing it out of there with Chaucer on his heels, he spent the morning walking the grounds with the dog and reading the paper. He couldn't face her. Not yet.

Four days. They had four days left together. He felt the heavy hands of time weighing on him like a globe. He felt like Atlas; left to carry the burden on his shoulders.

Was Harvey right? Was he worried that once home, he wouldn't be able to have Amy to himself, and that was what was bothering him? He didn't have any idea how he was going to separate his real life from what happened these last few weeks with Amy. The irony was, she was entering his real life. She'd be a permanent fixture, living four short miles away. Why was he making this so difficult?

The truth hit him with its ugliness. He was petrified that he couldn't continue this momentum once he returned to his normal routine. How would she fit in? Where would she fit in? Would she come over for dinner at the apartment? Would he and his friends meet her for dinner at the Cheesecake Factory? Would they have lunch in the cantina? Would they invite her along for paintball, game nights, or movie nights? Would Penny, Bernadette, and Emily warm to her? Accept her…if he allowed it to get that far?

Amy and Sheldon had become friends. Brought together by happenstance, they grew close due to circumstances beyond their control.

But just where would Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler fit in to Dr. Sheldon Cooper's life, once they were both living in Pasadena and working for Caltech? Once they were out of their secret hideaway, and placed under the microscope of nosy co-workers, inquisitive bosses, and juvenile but well-meaning friends?

Coming back to himself, he looked down to find Amy watching him steadily. Her eyes were large and so green, gazing into his with so much emotion. What he would give to just tell her. Everything.

"Everything is fine, Amy. I think I feel a little seasick, is all. Just need to get my sea legs back," He said humorously, yet Amy detected a hint of sadness in his voice. He had been that way since last night, when she turned to find him gazing at her with that haunted look in his eyes after he found her in the woods.

Sheldon walked over to the doorway of the boathouse to get some air, and Amy followed him. She watched him with an ache in her heart.

"Sheldon"-

He turned abruptly, looking in the vicinity of her neck.

"When you leave, um…will the airline come pick up Chaucer…that morning?" Sheldon asked her, his off the cuff question startling her. His voice cracked on the last word and Amy frowned.

"Yes. They'll pick him up that morning and board him for two days before flying him out to me in California." Amy said quietly.

Sheldon nodded, also frowning.

"Would you mind if I kept him those two days, so he wouldn't have to be in a crate with strangers feeding him and walking him? They could pick him up the morning I fly out. You should be in California by then. That way, he won't be as afraid. If the reservation can be switched, of course." Sheldon hurried out, still avoiding eye contact with her.

Amy swallowed as she took in Sheldon's words. He was willing to keep Chaucer so he wouldn't be uncomfortable any longer than necessary? It touched her heart and Amy didn't know what to say. The bond Sheldon and her beloved pet had formed made her want to cry. She cleared her throat of the lump there.

"Sheldon, that's…very sweet. Are you sure you want to do that. I know he's a handful. He'll be fine, you know. He's done it before and he wasn't upset. He's used to being on his own," Amy whispered, overwhelmed with just how much this gesture of Sheldon's meant to her.

Sheldon winced as he stared at her. For some reason, Amy's words hit Sheldon right where he lived.

He's a handful

He'll be fine

He's used to being on his own…

Lies, all lies. No one was emotionless. No one.

He took a deep breath, letting it out noisily.

"How do you know that? That he'll 'be fine'? He can't tell you how he feels, Amy. He may just…put on a show for you. A front. So you won't worry. But inside, he may be…dying. You just don't know. You only see what he wants you to see," Sheldon murmured, his voice raspy and far away and sounding so lost.

Amy came to stand in front of him, surprised at the grief on Sheldon's face. She did the unthinkable, but she didn't know what else to do. Placing her hands on either side of his cheeks, she forced him to look at her.

"You're not only talking about Chaucer here, are you? What is happening inside that head of yours?" She whispered, unable to help herself and stroking his cheeks with her thumbs.

Sheldon closed his eyes, not able to look at her another second without breaking down and taking her into his arms. His entire body hummed at their gentle contact. He tried to keep his feet steady, but he wavered slightly.

"I'm a complicated man, Amy." He said quietly, not offering any further explanation.

Being the brilliant Scientist she was, Amy didn't need one, anyway.

"I know that, Sheldon. I've known that from the beginning. It doesn't affect how much I care for you, though. Or how much I respect you." She said tenderly, rubbing her thumbs across his cheeks. Sheldon pulled out of her grip gently. Her touch was entirely too tempting.

"It should. Because…I can't promise that I will always be a good friend to you. I'm doing my best, though." He whispered quietly. "I'm trying."

Amy's heart began to ache. Where was this coming from?

"I know you are, Sheldon. I can't ask you to be anything more than what you are," She said soothingly.

Sheldon chuffed in self-deprecation.

"You say that now, but…you don't know me. Not completely. I don't want to hurt you." He admitted, raising those haunted eyes back to hers.

Amy pulled back, folding her hands against her back as she leaned up against the wall. She knew what Sheldon was doing. It was a classic defensive tactic; he was trying to distance himself from her, so that her leaving wouldn't be so painful for him.

"I see. And by retreating back into your shell, you think you're…what? Protecting me?" She asked with a hint of staunchness in her tone.

Sheldon met her eyes sheepishly.

"I…I'd like to protect you. I just don't know how to," He admitted helplessly. "The truth is…the only one you need protection from is me." He whispered.

She came back to stand before him, tipping her head back to meet his gaze.

"Sheldon…everything will be fine. I promise you. I meant what I said. I would never tell anyone about our time here together. It's no one's business anyway. I would never compromise you like that." Amy said sincerely, worried that he was afraid she would out him somehow.

Sheldon's face crumpled as he gaze at her softly.

"I know you wouldn't. I know…" Sheldon whispered.

Amy bit her lip as they watched each other, sizing one another up. She could tell there was more he wanted to say, and she waited patiently as he gathered his courage.

"Amy…I really am so sorry about last night. I don't know what possessed me to behave like that. If you hadn't called my bluff…" He trailed off, the confession rushing out before he could stop it.

Amy's eyes widened as she took in his meaning.

"Then…what?" She whispered, swallowing thickly.

Sheldon met her gaze helplessly, the look in his eyes frightened.

"I…"

Just then, Missy came bounding down the dock and popped her head into the boathouse, startling Sheldon and Amy.

"Lunch is ready, ya'll come on in." She said, smiling. Her gaze flickered back and forth between the pair, before she realized she had intruded on something private.

Amy pursed her lips and blushed, looking down. Sheldon kept his eyes on Amy.

"We'll be right there, Missy." He whispered.

Missy left without another word.

A few moments passed before they were able to face each other again.

"Are you really willing to watch Chaucer those few days? Because I can call the airline and rearrange his flight." Amy said softly.

Sheldon nodded.

"Yes. Of course I'm willing. I wouldn't have suggested it otherwise," Sheldon said quietly.

Amy smiled at him tenderly.

"Thank you. He would love that, it just being the two of you for a bit." She said truthfully.

Sheldon nodded faintly.

"I would, too." He whispered.

They both knew the near collision last night was no fluke. But now wasn't the time to discuss it.

"Shall we?" He asked her politely, ushering her to walk ahead of him down the dock.

Amy nodded, walking ahead and trying to plaster on the happy face she knew she must.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Missy and Amy put away the last of the lunch dishes, before Amy wiped down the counters and threw the paper towels she used in the trash.

"Sit a spell, Amy." Missy prompted, headed out the back door to the veranda. She settled into a swing rocker, and Amy sat on a rocking chair across from her. They settled in with a cup of tea each.

Harvey, Mary, and Sheldon had gone into town to get some gear for the boat trip back to the cottage, leaving the two woman alone.

"So tell me about yourself, Amy. How long have you been a Neurobiologist?" She asked conversationally.

"Ten years." Amy answered, smiling at her.

"Wow…I think what you do is amazing. Do you have the training to do brain surgery?" Missy asked in awe.

Amy giggled.

"Well…if I had to, probably. I know everything about the brain, both human and primate. I can removed tumors. I can dissect. I'm sure in a pinch, if I was stranded on a desert island with someone who needed emergency surgery, I could hold my own." She said with humor. "Not that I'd like to test that theory, of course."

Missy laughed, shaking her head.

"You're amazing, Amy. I can see why Sheldon is so attracted to you."

The words slipped out before Missy could stop them, prompting Amy to sputter on her tea.

"I'm sorry, what?" Amy asked, her voice timid and fearful.

Missy bit her lip. Shrugging. It was out now, no use trying to take it back.

"My brother. He thinks the world of you. Surely, you must realize that. He doesn't behave this way around anyone, Amy. You are the exception to his every rule." Missy said gently.

Amy's heart began to accelerate with a combination of fear and hope. But she could not get her hopes up, not now. Not after Sheldon basically told her an hour ago that a relationship with him would be fraught with pitfalls. If he was trying to sabotage a romance before it began, he was doing his best. Amy knew that keeping Sheldon in her life as a friend was better than nothing at all.

"I'm sorry, Missy. I don't know what you think you see, but…Sheldon does not think of me that way." Amy murmured, her voice holding an edge of sadness.

Missy narrowed her eyes at the younger woman, leaning forward to get her full attention.

"I'll tell you what I see. I see a beautiful woman who doesn't know it. I see woman who has singlehandedly, in the span of a few weeks, turned a caterpillar into a butterfly. A man so afraid to trust anyone that he would hide himself from the entire world. What you've done to him in the course of a fortnight…it's simply boggles my mind." Missy said in wonder.

Amy peered at her.

"What I've done to him?" Amy squeaked in confusion, shaking her head.

Missy looked at Amy pointedly, unnerving her when she arched a brow.

"He loves you." Missy stated, knocking the wind out of her.

"W-What are you talking about?" Amy laughed nervously. Missy smiled sadly at how deeply Amy was defending him.

"My brother. He loves you. It's a plain as the nose on his face. But he's fighting it, with everything inside of him. Sheldon is his own worst enemy. He makes everything so hard." Missy said, drawing out the last word.

Amy stared at her in shock.

"Maybe you're not seeing him clearly. He doesn't…He can't…" Amy stuttered, not allowing herself to say those words.

He loves me.

Missy sighed, ruffling her long hair with her fingers.

"I want you to know something. I don't know what my brother's life is like back home. He doesn't tell us much. It's like…he lives a secret life or something. I know a few of his friends. Leonard, Howard, Raj…they're great guys. But again, Sheldon is very guarded with them. He's never been able to trust anyone. He still doesn't trust me, and I'm his twin sister. I know I've been mean to him, in the past. As a kid, it was hard having a genius for a brother. Everyone expected me to be just like him. I could barely write a book report, let alone solve an equation. I teased him. When my girlfriends teased him, I let them. I feel really bad about that now, of course. But…the day I turned up at the cottage, and found him on that dock…I knew something had changed for him. Something big. When he explained to me what had happened, and…what he'd done, I had never seen him display such remorse for someone else's feelings. Sheldon is a good man, Amy. But he is haunted by things that…I don't know. If you are going to be his friend, or someday something more, than you need to realize it won't be an easy climb. You'll need to have patience. You'll need to…realize that he has a process. And without it, he's lost. I don't doubt that Sheldon can change if he truly wants to. He's lived a certain way for so long, that it's all he knows. Perhaps all he needs is something to live for. Someone else to live for," Missy said passionately.

Amy gazed at Missy with watery eyes, afraid to believe that Sheldon could care about her that deeply.

Can you do that?" Missy asked hopefully.

Amy watched as tears rolled down Missy's face. It was clear Missy loved her brother very much, and held remorse for their past. For some reason, she wanted to reassure her new friend that she would do everything in her power to ensure her brother's future happiness.

"Yes. I can. I have no choice, because…" She drifted off, unable to finish.

Missy tilted her head in understanding.

"Because you love him, too." Missy finished, her voice soft.

Two pairs of eyes met and held, the truth sinking in.

"Yes." Amy whispered, wiping her eyes.

"Thank God." Missy said laughing, wiping her wet eyes. "Thank God."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Okay, here we go. Are you ready, Skipper? Preparing to jibe." Harvey yelled to Amy, shouting out the warning in his no nonsense voice.

Amy grinned at the salutation of being called Skipper, nodding vigorously. She wiped her hands on the back of her jeans to dry them before firmly gripping the stern. She began to guide the boat windward, approaching through the eye of the wind.

"Ready." She answered loudly in exhilaration. Harvey smiled at her enthusiasm. He pulled the mainsail in all the way, controlling the jibe. He waited patiently until the wind met them.

"Ready about! We're coming in fast." Harvey instructed Sheldon, Mary, and Missy, who hung tight preparing for the transition. He turned quickly to Amy and gave her the order.

"…Jibe ho!" He shouted over the wind, laughing enthusiastically as the boat met the wind with top speed. The other three passengers ducked as the sail swung around. Harvey ran around to the other side, letting out the mainsail on that side.

Amy turned the wheel flawlessly, the boat shifting smoothly as it sailed into the wind. She gaze Harvey a quick thumbs up which he returned.

"Mary, release the headsail," Harvey shouted, and Mary ran about to complete the task.

Sheldon smiled in awe as he watched his mother work the sail with ease. He had no idea she could trim a sail so well. Harvey's tutelage, he thought with pride. Obviously, the man was good for his mother in more ways than one.

"HaHa!" Amy shouted happily, the wind flowing through her hair as the mainsail plumed high above the boat. The feeling of exhilaration was amazing. Harvey came over to pat Amy on the back for her flawless execution. Sheldon watched the scene unfold with admiration. Amy was amazing. He had no idea she could steer a boat so well. He should have realized it, after their day on the lake in the rowboat.

"Where on Earth did you learn to sail like that, Dr. Fowler? My boy Christopher who has a hundred pounds on you can't even steer this thing!" Harvey told Amy, chuckling at the proud look on her face.

Amy tilted her head and laughed.

"I was on the ladies rowing team at Harvard. Part of our training was going out onto Boston Harbor and practicing with the current winners of the America Cup." She said, smiling proudly.

Harvey shook his head back and forth. It seemed Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler had it all.

"You are a little dynamo, young lady. I'd be honored to see what you can do with a scalpel." He chuckled wryly.

Amy laughed, the melodious sound making Sheldon smile.

"I'm not so sure about that. Stop by my lab one day when I'm trying to remove the locus coeruleus from one of my brains. Grown men have passed on me." She chuckled wryly.

Harvey snickered at her.

"Ah, heck. You haven't seen gore until you've broken up a fight at a Lone Star bar," Harvey joked, and Amy smiled widely. She handed over the wheel to Harvey, and he held out his hand for her to shake.

"Good job, Dr. Fowler. You have a place on my crew anytime." He said, shaking her hand.

"You have the conn, Skipper." Amy replied sternly, and Harvey looked at Sheldon in shock.

"I like this girl, Sheldon." Harvey said slyly, causing Amy to blush as she met Sheldon's deep stare of admiration.

"I like her too," Sheldon said affectionately.

Amy went to sit with Sheldon and Missy as Mary sat with Harvey.

As they settled in, Missy turned to Amy with glee.

"Wow, Amy. You did such a great job! Didn't she, Sheldon?" Missy asked her brother happily.

Sheldon bit his lip as his eyes met Amy's.

"She always does," He said warmly, looking down when Amy broke into a dazzling smile. Missy watched the scene with a heavy heart.

She knew without a doubt that her brother loved this woman. And it didn't matter that they had only know each other 17 days. Wars had been won and lost in shorter amounts of time. Besides…her twin was never one to do things the practical way.

Missy had watched Sheldon's face as Amy helped Harvey sail the boat, amazed at the changes in her brother. When last she'd spoken to him, back in October, he had been going off on a tangent about Leonard and Penny and how their wedding plans were driving him crazy.

'All they ever talk about these days is romance, cake, love, romance, lace, invitations, romance…it's like living in a Harlequin romance novel around my apartment. So they're in love. Blah, blah, blah. Enough already,' He had bemoaned, going on to say that romance and its backlash were driving him crazy.

Now here he was, gazing at this woman who had stormed into his life like a hurricane as though she held those mysteries of the Universe he had been seeking for so long. He couldn't tear his eyes away from her as she helped Harvey hoist the sails and steer the boat. Missy had a feeling that whatever they were talking about down by the boathouse today, it was heavy.

She didn't want to meddle, even though she knew this might be her last chance to get Amy alone before she left. Her speech to Amy came from the heart. She loved her brother, and she was sorry for the way his life had been shaped by people who didn't understand him. She had played a part in that as well, she thought with regret. Hearing from Amy's own lips that she loved Sheldon had made her heart soar. She knew if anyone could shake up Sheldon's life, it was Amy. Not only had no other woman ever looked twice at Sheldon, despite his handsome good looks, no woman had ever had the patience to look beyond the surface. Sheldon's surface was like a rough piece of driftwood; gnarly and rough. But if someone took the time to smooth it down, tend to it with love…they would have a fine and beautiful instrument beneath.

Amy said something that had Sheldon breaking out in laughter so fierce, that Harvey and Mary turned to view the scene. Mary's eye's met her daughter's, and they gave each other a knowing look.

Amy Farrah Fowler was definitely the 'One'.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

It was late when they arrived home, both deciding on a quick snack before bed after Chaucer was walked and fed. After sharing some cheese, crackers, and fruit, they sat on the downstairs deck which overlooked the water side by side in the comfortable deck chairs there.

"Did you enjoy yourself today, Amy?" Sheldon asked, his sleepy voice soothing her own tired mind.

"I did. Thank you, Sheldon. Your family is wonderful. I'll miss them." She said, her voice taking on a sad edge that Sheldon didn't want to face.

"You know…for the first time in a long time, I will too." Sheldon admitted sheepishly.

Amy turned in her chair, leaning her temple on her wrist as she studied him in the soft light of dusk.

"Really?" She asked softly, hoping Sheldon would elaborate further.

He sighed, turning sideways to face her, too.

"I used to dread coming home. I don't know why. I mean, Mama can be overbearing with her faith, but…she was always loving. And Missy too. Meemaw…well, I always loved seeing her. I don't know, I guess…since my father died, I felt like I was this drifting buoy. The family stayed here, I went to Germany to teach before moving to Pasadena for my doctorate…and we just drifted apart. The years passed and I felt less and less like a Cooper. I don't know…maybe that's what I needed at the time." Sheldon said quietly, his eyes gazing into the past as Amy watched.

She had so many questions about this man whom she'd come to adore. Something deep and dark had happened to him as a child; some trauma that had shaped him to be the man he was today. She hoped that one day, Sheldon could move past it to be the man she knew he could be. Until then, she would do her best to support him. Without further thought, she put her free hand on top of his to pry his attention back to her. Sheldon gazed at her with curious eyes.

"What happened with your father, Sheldon? Why do you hold such a bad memory of him?" Amy asked gently.

Sheldon tensed up, his face turning to stone. He turned away from Amy quickly, his eyes peering out into the darkened lake.

"My father was a good man once. Or so I was told. Maybe when George Jr. was a baby. But by the time Missy and I were born, things had taken a drastic turn for the worst." He said ominously.

Amy narrowed her brows, frowning.

"How so?" She pressed, her voice gentle.

Sheldon took a deep breath, releasing it slowly.

"George Jr. is 7 years older than Missy and I. I don't think my father was keen on having another baby so long after him, let alone two. My mother had gained a lot of weight with twins, as you can imagine, and by her 6th month, she was on bed rest. Something happened during that time. I don't know what, Mama never talks about it, but it was something bad. I heard Meemaw and Mama crying about it one day, but they hushed up when I came into the room. It was around that time, that my father began to drink. Heavily. And he didn't let up until he died. George Jr. went off into the army when Missy and I turned 11. Things…got really bad. He missed his firstborn son, as the two of them were like peas in a pod. They hunted together, fished together…Missy was a girl so she was excluded, and I just wasn't interested in those things, so I was excluded as well. Losing George Jr. turned our household upside down. My parent's fought constantly. My father began staying out late. Sometimes, the whole night. Just before he died of a heart attack, Mama found out he had been having affairs behind her back for years. Years, Amy. He would get drunk and take out his aggressions on us. All of us. Sometimes, it was a whipping with a belt. Other times, it was a jab to hurt us. Missy was too stupid. I was too weird. It was a never ending battle. We never told Mama the worst of it, because she was bearing the brunt of it herself. There were times I just wanted to disappear. If it wasn't him hitting me, it was the kids at school. He would do terrible things to me, to hurt my feelings. He knew I had…quirks. He would hide things of mine to upset me, then tell me to deal with it like a man. He'd come into my room and mess up my things out of order, knowing it would cause me to have a panic attack. He'd stand in the doorway and laugh as I struggled to fix things back. I began to hate him," Sheldon said, his voice faltering. He looked over at Amy cautiously to find her in tears.

"Amy…" He said in warning, mad at himself that he upset her. "Please don't cry." He begged her.

Amy nodded, her tears falling faster.

"I'm sorry. I just…that is horrible. I thought I was the only one whose father behaved that way. How could your father do that to you? All of you? His wife…" Amy faltered, hoping against hope that he hadn't ever abused her.

Sheldon shrugged.

"I don't know. What makes a man do anything? My father, your father... You know, my biggest fear growing up, was that I would turn out just like him." Sheldon said remorsefully.

Amy gasped, grabbing Sheldon's arm tightly.

"You could never do that, Sheldon. You are the most decent man I've ever met." She said sincerely.

Sheldon gazed at her a moment, his guilt over last night returning again. He got up and walked to the railing, unable to face her.

Decent…

If only she knew the thoughts that had been running through his mind lately. Thoughts that would make a sailor blush. She wouldn't think him so decent, then.

"Amy…you don't know me. Not…everything. There are things about me… If you knew the truth…you'd go running in the other direction." He said with surety.

Amy frowned at Sheldon's back.

"Why don't you let me make that choice?" She said seriously.

Her commanding tone caught Sheldon's ear and he turned to face her. She wouldn't back down, gazing at him steadily.

"I have OCD. You knew that. I've kept it under control here, but…it gets bad sometimes. Really bad. I can't sleep for days. I just…work and work, and work myself to death. I push myself so hard that I become someone else. I have these long blocks of time where I just disconnect. I say things I don't mean. I…alienate people. I drive them crazy. I can't help it. It's just who I am. The Doctor's I've seen said it's a part of my intellect. My brain function is so high that it goes haywire. I could take medication for it, but I'm terrified it will stymy my creative abilities. I'm…trapped. Trapped in this brain that I wish I could just shut down for a day. But even that terrifies me. Who am I? If not the great Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper?" He asked her, true fear in his voice. He turned back around to avoid her soft gaze.

Amy got up to stand next to him, placing her hand on his back comfortingly.

"You need to give yourself a break, Sheldon. Even the greatest of minds understands that man is only as intelligent as his heart allows him to become. Trust your heart once in a while, not just your intelligence."

That was cold comfort, considering he could hurt her one day with his callousness.

"If I ever hurt you, Amy…if I ever broke your trust in me? It would kill me. Don't you understand? You are the first person to ever just…get me. You didn't judge me. You didn't push me. You were so patient and kind. You…you're the most wonderful person I've ever met." He admitted tenderly, his eyes tearing up.

Sheldon turned away, exhausted all of a sudden.

"What makes you so certain you will hurt me?" She asked him gently.

Sheldon shook his head back and forth in frustration.

"I just…know. I cannot take that risk. Please…don't ask me to. You have no idea what you'd be opening yourself up for." He said fearfully.

Amy nodded sadly, placing her soft palm on his cheek.

"I don't understand what it is you're so afraid of, Sheldon. I'm a big girl. But I will leave it to you to decide. I'm not going anywhere." She promised.

'I wish I could believe that', Sheldon prayed silently.

They turned to face each other, and her beauty and warmth was just too much for him to resist.

Sheldon gathered her to his chest, pressing his body against hers as closely as he dared. Amy laid her head against his breastbone, closing her eyes when Sheldon began to stroke her hair gently. The soft, soothing sound of crickets filled the night air, lulling them both. Her soft, fragrant body melted against him and he melted into her. She listened to his heartbeat, steady and strong. She longed for the day when their hearts could merge together, and beat in sync.

What he wouldn't give to show her how much she'd changed him. To thank her for opening him up to possibilities he had previously shunned and didn't believe existed. He was terrified to take that step; to fall off that mountain and have faith. He wanted to drag her to his bed and prove to them both that he could do it. He could be the man that she needed and deserved. But he wasn't ready. He needed time to trust himself.

As much as he trusted her.

Amy leaned up on her tip toes, placing a tender kiss on Sheldon's neck. She lingered there, trailing her lips across his Adam's apple with a gentle sensuousness that stunned Sheldon. He shuddered and closed his eyes, the urge to devour her driving him insane. He leaned down and kissed the side of her head, waiting to see what Amy would do. But she made the choice for him, pulling back and stepping away.

She was gone when he opened his eyes again, leaving him on the veranda with his thoughts. His fears. And his longings. Her scent lingered, wrapping itself around him like a ghostly mist.

It was then that he knew, he would never be free of her. He needed her like he needed air. His bubble was about to burst, and he knew the fallout would be nothing short of suffocation.

A/N – Thank you for reading. Next chapter…New Year's Eve.