Disclaimer: I no own Hetalia or the song in here.

This is long, I think. I was carried away with picturing what would happen if the nations were drunk too long, so that's why this is long. Anyway, hope you enjoy and now... ROLL FILM~!

Chapter 14

"Aw nuts!" Monique groaned once France broke the news. "At least we can figure out where they are. Come on!"

While Monique and France were shoving their way through the crowd, America and England had a very drunken conversation.

"Dude, those fairies… do they make you mad?" America asked.

"I'm no Harry Potter, you twit!" England yelled.

"Whoa… you serious? They do make you mad? They're all cutesy and tiny and sparkly!" America giggled.

"I mean, it would be awesome to be Harry Potter, because I can magically make your thick skull smarter!" England screamed.

"Yeah… if I was a fairy, I would prank you until you scream," America sighed happily.

"I'd trade my life with Harry Potter, because he doesn't have to hang with nut-jobs like you," England coldly stated.

"Dude, look at that sunset!" America gasped.

Selena, Jay, Jasmine, Naomi, and Sonya already arrived on the scene. "I knew it!" Jasmine groaned. "They're drunk…"

"Great, just great!" Sonya moaned.

Jay spotted Annabel and Violet cowering near England and America. "Yo, Violet, Annabel, how did they get drunk?" Jay called to them.

"They got drunk on vodka," Annabel informed.

"…But they're not the only ones drunk, though," Violet mentioned. "When Japan and the Chang brothers came, America did some kind of 'chugging train' on Japan and made him drunk!"

"Oh goodness," Naomi and Selena gasped. "Is he okay?"

"He is, but he's trying his best to keep his drunk down," Annabel nodded.

"China got drunk, too," Violet updated. "I don't know about Canada, though. And Russia is just continually cursing everybody and giving sunflowers."

Monique and France already arrived on the scene. "Sonya!" Monique squealed. "It is you!" She hugged her friend warmly.

"It's good to see you again," Sonya smiled. "But can you help us figure out how are we going to go around the world with these guys drunk?"

"Um… what are they drunk on, though?" Monique asked.

"Vodka," Annabel answered.

"What kind: the French-modified one or the original, Russian?" Violet asked. "I heard they had some from France…"

"Wait, England, let me see that cup, please," Annabel asked politely.

"What cup: the Triwizard Cup?" England asked. "Uh-uh. Last time I heard of it, it was a Portkey to He-who-must-not-be-named. I can't risk you transporting to him, love."

"No, not that cup, silly," Annabel sighed as other Harry Potter fans in the crowd laughed. "I mean the cup you're drinking from!"

"Oh, this cup," England realized. "Here you go."

Annabel took the cup away from England. "Monique-that's your name, right? If it is, do you know how to identify alcohol? I don't really know how…" Annabel asked.

"Sure thing," Monique accepted. "Yes, that is my name. And I know how to identify alcohol. My other best friend's dad is an alcoholic and I can tell what kind of drink it is by the smell." She sniffed at the cup. "This smell… it is strong, but it's… not original. Mr. Fournier brought French-modified vodka to the party. Oh, nuts…" Monique sighed.

"Okay, now I think we should-" Violet started before she heard a crash. "What was that?"

Liang and Shen suddenly ran into the room. "France drank some vodka, too!" Liang notified.

"Great… He was the one who warned me about the alcohol. Now, he's drinking it!" Monique sighed.

"What are the nations doing? Did you keep track of them?" Selena asked.

"Yeah, I did," Shen answered. "We all know what America and England are doing…"

"Dude, British people can be dull," America pointed out. "Why did you come here? You sucked the fun out of this evening!"

"I don't see what the point of the Revolutionary War was," England argued. "I mean, I only became your brother because I was trying to save you from that frog-faced git, but nuh-uh!"

"…yeah, so 'Scones' and 'Hero' are here," Sonya nodded. "Continue on, Shen."

"Nice nicknames for them," Shen approved. "Anyway, I spotted China a while ago. France apparently was trying to give some alcohol to someone else."

"Who?" Almost everybody asked.

"A woman about twenty," Shen replied. "She had blonde hair, a slight French accent, and a sarcastic attitude. She seemed pretty serious, too."

"Hey that sounds like… that woman backstage with me!" Sonya recognized.

"What do you mean?" Jay asked.

"Before I was on stage, I asked one of the back-up singers what song we were singing," Sonya explained. "She sounded exactly like that!"

"What happened to her?" Naomi asked.

"Well, before France could give that lady alcohol 'mouth-to-mouth,'" Shen continued, "China came and whacked France with his wok… which I don't know how he was toting it around."

"Wait, France was going to use mouth-to-mouth?" Jasmine asked. "Yup, he's really drunk."

"How about Japan and Canada?" Sonya asked.

"I saw them!" Liang called. "Japan was okay, but he had his tie wrapped around his head… anyone find that a unique way to be drunk? He was near the karaoke stand and resisting the urge to sing there."

"…Er, right… What about Canada?" Selena asked.

"He seemed fine," Shen told them. "He didn't touch that alcohol. I'm sure glad that Germany and those Italy brothers aren't here. It would have been a whole lot worse."

"Yup, it would," everyone agreed.

"I think we should get rid of the alcohol now," Naomi told the others.

"No, duh!" Monique rolled her eyes. "I've been thinking that for an hour! We were just here wasting our time talking! While we were, the other nations could have probably been doing other stuff!"

"Like what America and England are doing right now?" Jasmine asked.

"What are they doing?" Selena asked.

"Why don't you take a look?" Violet groaned.

When they turned around, they regretted it. America and England were rolling on the floor, wrestling.

"…All UsUk fangirls would scream-" Naomi mentioned.

"Don't think like that," Monique interrupted.

"Okay, you two, break it up!" Jay yelled. He and Shen separated the two English-speaking countries.

"We'll retain these two," Shen told the others. "You guys go get rid of that alcohol."

"Right," Liang agreed. "Come on guys!"

With that, Liang and the others raced off to get rid of the alcohol.

America: "I'm no wanker, dude... whatever that means!"

England: "I would tell you, but the definition won't go through your thick skull!"

Jay: "Sorry, we have to break these two up again, folks... so just keep reading."

"Okay, Jasmine and I will get the bottles from this table," Selena instructed. "Violet and Annabel will get the bottles over there at that table." She pointed northwest. "Monique and Sonya, you will get the bottles from the table on the left. Liang and Naomi, you guys will get the table way over there. Are there any questions?"

"Nope," everybody shook their heads.

"Actually, I have one," Monique piped up. "Lucie, the birthday girl's dad is an alcoholic. He might get really mad if we get rid of the alcohol. Who's going to ask if we can get rid of the alcohol?"

"Good question," Selena nodded towards Violet. "Violet, you're the braver one; you ask Lucie's dad."

"What? Why should I ask?" Violet indignantly retorted, trembling with fear as she pictured how Lucie's dad would be if they removed the alcohol.

"Okay, I'll conduct a survey. How many of you want to go up to Lucie's dad and ask a question that includes ridding the alcohol in the party, which he absolutely loves?" Jasmine asked. No one raised their hand; they were all trembling in fear.

"See? You're the braver one," Selena pointed out. "Now, ask him!"

"Okay, fine, I will," Violet sighed. "But I don't know where he is!"

"I'll show you," Monique offered. "Besides, he doesn't know that much English. I can be your translator."

"Thanks for offering that, but I know French," Violet proudly bragged.

"You do?" Monique asked, surprised.

"Okay, I know some words in French, but not all," Violet corrected. "Maybe I do need you to come with me."

"Sure thing," Monique assured. "Besides, I can be your back-up. Monsieur Fournier isn't really the gentle type."

"Thanks," Violet acknowledged. Together, Monique led Violet away to confront Mr. Fournier.

"Now what should we do?" Sonya asked. Suddenly, they heard some singing that sounded really familiar...

"Oh, man, that's Japan's voice!" Naomi exclaimed. "Selena, we have to help him!"

"The alcohol got to him," Selena sighed. "Naomi and I will be right back."

Selena and Naomi hurried off to stop Japan from ridiculously singing karaoke.

Japan: "At least I don't have my tie around my head, right?"

Selena and Naomi arrived on scene to witness a totally major Japan fangirl experience: hearing Japan's smooth and hot voice sail all throughout the room. Only, this time, they had no time to fangirl. They were serious this time. Besides, Japan wasn't singing the best song to suit his voice.

"Why is he singing 'I'll Be There'?" Naomi asked Selena.

"The alcohol definitely took over Japan," Selena confirmed. "We need to help him out. Come on!"

As Selena and Naomi hurried over to Japan's side, Naomi groaned. "'I'll Be There' is one of my favorite songs," Naomi commented.

"Okay, so what? Isn't it better to hear your favorite anime character singing that song?" Selena asked.

"Yes, but he's messing the lyrics up!"

"With his accent?"

"No, not at all!" Naomi shook her head. "He's messing the lyrics up literally. He's slurring through words and changing words and all."

"Oh, I didn't notice that," Selena admitted.

"You're just paying attention to his voice, aren't you?" Naomi scolded.

"Maybe," Selena jokingly smiled.

Naomi and Selena joined the crowd that was forming around the singing Japan. "You're right, he is messing up the lyrics," Selena agreed.

"How do we get him out of there?" Naomi asked. "People are starting to laugh and point at him!"

"Hm…" Selena hummed. "Okay, I'll distract the crowd, and you pull Japan away. Got it?"

"I guess…" Naomi agreed reluctantly.

Suddenly, Selena started whistling suspiciously and going towards the karaoke machine. She waited patiently and whistled as the song came to a close. Once the song ended, Selena volunteered herself in a duet with Japan.

"What?" Naomi yelped. "She's nuts!"

One of the crowd pretended he was a referee. "We've got a challenger challenging the legendary 'Tone-deaf Drunkard'!" Almost the whole crowd laughed at that. "And what song would you be singing, kiddo?"

"Do you have the song, 'My Life Would Suck without You'?" Selena asked. Naomi slowly attempted to creep up on Japan as the crowd all cheered.

"Yes, we do," the same man nodded. He pressed a couple of buttons on the microphone, and soon, the acoustically electronic instrumental started to play.

Naomi soon successfully crept up to Japan. "Psst! Let's get out of here! You're making a fool of yourself!" Naomi whispered before Selena started to sing.

"Guess this means you're sorry.

You're standing at my door.

Guess this means you take back

All you've said before."

"Why should I leave? After all, this is a contest after all," Japan slurred.

"Yup, you are definitely drunk," Naomi sighed. "You said 'After all' twice. Japan, we need to go!"

"Nashi, I won't," Japan stubbornly stated.

Some people in the crowd started to notice Naomi and Japan's little quarrel. "They're starting to notice…" Naomi whispered to Selena.

"I've got this," Selena assured as she took on the chorus:

"'Cause we belong together, now.

Forever united here, somehow.

You got a piece of me

And honestly

My life would suck without you!" Selena hit notes that seemed impossible to most of the audience, so that grabbed their attention.

As the audience cheered, Naomi continued to urge Japan firmly and gently. "No, I won't leave until I dishonor her family," Japan firmly chose.

"…Poor Selena, then," Naomi sighed. "I guess there's only one thing left for me to do. I'll just have to drag you out."

"Being with you

Is so dysfunctional.

I really shouldn't miss you

But I can't let you go."

Naomi grabbed Japan by his sleeve and, with all her might, pulled. "Wow that salt must have made you strong and tough, because you're heavy!" Naomi gasped.

Naomi decided to try a different tactic and push Japan from his back. With all the strength she could muster, she attempted to push and shove Japan, but to no avail. Naomi cussed under her breath in Japanese as Selena was beginning to end the song.

"Ai yah!" a familiar voice called. Suddenly, China appeared out of nowhere and smacked Naomi with his wok.

"What the-? What was that for, China?" Naomi yelped. The audience began to watch Naomi intently. Great, they've noticed me. Thanks a lot, China, Naomi sarcastically thought.

"Don't hurt my kid brother," China yelled.

Selena stopped singing and looked over at Naomi's sticky situation. "Man, does everyone get into bad situations?" Selena wondered aloud. She tried to hurry over to Naomi and assist, but to no avail. France stepped in front of her. He was the only obstacle between Naomi and her starting point.

"Selena, why don't you try some of this?" France offered, holding out his glass of vodka.

"No thanks, I'm too young to drink, and I will never drink alcohol," Selena bluntly stated.

"That's okay; people can be stubborn," France forgave, even though Selena didn't even apologize. He approached the helpless Filipino closely and horror washed over Selena.

"What are you doing, man?" Selena asked, horrified.

"I'm going to give this to you, mouth-to-mouth," France smirked.

Selena could've sworn that puke was about to form in her mouth. Selena was about to scream at France's face as he came closer and closer. Suddenly, someone pushed France away. It was America! No, wait… it was Canada!

"Papa, get away from her!" Canada screamed, or actually whispered. "She doesn't want that alcohol; leave her alone!"

France pouted, seeing that his adoptive son kind of screamed. He smiled and ran away. "Thanks, Canada," Selena thanked.

"Ouch!" Naomi yelled.

Selena and Canada turned around to see Naomi getting whacked with China's wok, really hard. Suddenly, Japan took out his katana.

"Oh-" Selena cussed. "He's not going to use that sword, is he?"

Japan started to swipe at Naomi. Luckily, Naomi ducked. "What the butternut was that for?" Naomi yelled.

"He is…" Canada sighed.

"We better help Naomi then!" Selena yelped. The audience didn't do anything; they were just enjoying the "show."

Naomi back-flipped to avoid Japan's swipe. She then ducked to evade China's wok. "This reminds me of my martial arts classes all over again," Naomi groaned.

Naomi flipped again to avoid China's wok, but Japan's blade was right there. His katana was right where Naomi was about to land.

"Naomi, watch out!" Selena screamed.

Naomi, quick to look, spotted the sword. Naomi doubled over and flipped over to the side.

Selena quickly grabbed onto Japan's arms while Canada snagged Japan's katana.

"That's enough!" Selena yelled, but China whacked her with his wok.

"Shut up!" he yelled.

"Watch out for those guys!" someone called.

Suddenly, like a bull, two men charged in. "You git, get away from me!" England screamed.

"Dude, you're my bud, and buds can't leave the other's side!" America contradicted.

"That's not true!" England yelled.

China hit both American and England with his wok. "Pork, you guys should keep quiet!"

"So should you!" Japan argued, shoving Selena off.

France appeared once again. "Ohonhon~ so… the tension has caught up with all of us has it?"

"Shut up, you frog!" England shouted.

"No, it hasn't!" Everyone but the audience screamed.

Suddenly, England and France wound up in a fist-fight, while America was invading Japan's personal space by hugging him too much. China repeatedly hit Japan and America with his wok. Canada was the only sane nation.

Jay, Shen, Sonya, Jasmine, Annabel, and Liang came to the rescue. "Wholly macaroni!" Jasmine exclaimed. "This party is a complete mess now."

"We got to break 'em up!" Selena and Naomi yelled.

"We got that," Jay nodded. "Shen and I will get China. You guys get the others!"

"Naomi, let's try to get Japan," Selena told Naomi.

"Right," Naomi agreed.

Jay and Shen worked together to retain China. Jay gracefully grabbed China's arms while Shen seized China's wok. He decided to do the others a little favor.

"Canada, can you hold China's other arm for me?" Shen called out to Canada.

"Sure thing," Canada nodded. He held onto China's arm.

Shen quickly banged every nations head with the wok hard, so as to knock them out. It worked for America, but not for the rest.

"Oh snap, I'm in trouble," Shen groaned. He dropped the wok and started to run as Japan threatened Shen with his katana.

Selena jumped onto Japan and grabbed his arms. But, she accidentally knocked down Japan to the floor. She held tightly onto Japan's arms and called out, "Naomi, grab his katana!"

"I'm on it!" Naomi yelled and seized Japan's katana.

"Hey, Sonya, get France, please!" Selena yelled as she struggled with Japan's stubbornness.

"Yes, ma'am!" Sonya agreed. She pinned down France and forced his arms behind his back. Liang did the same with England.

But, their efforts to hold down the drunken nations were in vain. The mess of the drunken nations became even worse when Russia suddenly came in and gave Selena and the others a scare. "Become one with Mother Russia, da?" Russia asked with his innocent smile.

"Um, no thanks," Sonya stated, pushing Russia gently away.

Suddenly, she felt something hit her head hard. "Ouch!" Sonya screamed as she touched her head. When she withdrew her hand, she felt horrified to see a little bit blood. "What was that for?"

"You will become one with mother Russia," Russia stated, the dark haze getting darker.

"Oh my butternut," Sonya screamed as she started to break into a dead-run for the hills. She let go of France, which made things bad. "Help me!"

Jay heard the scream and called out, "Sonya!" He didn't know what to do; if he lets go of China, things will be really bad. "Canada, hold onto China real tight. I'm going to help Sonya."

"Sure," Canada agreed.

But as soon as Jay left, China took the advantage and released his arms from Canada's grip. China grabbed the wok from the floor began to run towards Shen.

France approached Selena with the vodka again, but this time, he was aiming for Naomi. "Ohonhon~" France laughed. "Naomi, why don't you try some of this?"

"No thank you," Naomi refused.

France was about to use his mouth-to-mouth strategy, so Selena yelled, "Naomi, run for it!"

Naomi obeyed and ran, taking Japan's katana with her. Japan took the advantage and busted out of Selena's grip.

Soon Naomi slowed down and rested for a bit, but to her surprise, Japan was right there.

"Give me my katana," Japan directed.

"NAOMI, RUN!" Selena screamed. France was approaching Selena closer.

Naomi shook her head and ran for her life.

"Oh my butternut, Naomi!" Liang yelled, desiring to do something. Naomi ran past Liang. Suddenly, Liang had an idea. He stuck his foot out and tripped Japan, which accidentally gave England an advantage.

Soon as Japan got up and started to run again, England broke free. He pulled off a roundhouse, but Liang was able to avoid it.

"Whoa, calm down!" Liang yelled as he attempted to pin down England again. As soon as Liang grabbed his arm, England kicked him hard in… a certain place.

"Ow," Liang groaned as he stumbled to the floor in pain. He couldn't catch up with the rushing England. "…That… guy's… got… mad… skills."

"I've got England!" Annabel assured. With her good arm, she grabbed England's arms, but was quickly punched on the face. Annabel was knocked to the floor, groaning. "At least that didn't break this arm," Annabel joked.

"Whatever happened to boys don't hit girls?" Jasmine cursed as she rushed to Annabel's side to help.

"Oh please, he's drunk, so what do you expect?" Annabel chuckled.

As Liang groaned some more, Shen began to notice. "Liang!" Shen yelled. He rushed over to his brother's side. "Are you alright? Where did England kick you?"

Liang just pointed to a place and groaned again. "Ouch, that's got to hurt…" Shen sighed.

"Ai yah!" China called.

"Oh no, watch out!" Liang called. Shen protected Liang and shoved him out of the way. Suddenly, Shen was hit hard on the wok, and the world suddenly became black for him.

"Shen!" Liang cried out. Liang, being experienced in martial arts himself, kicked China's wok skillfully from his hand. After wincing a bit, Liang stated, "…Don't do that to my brother!"

"Alright, everybody stop!" a familiar voice cried. It was Violet, who cried out, and Monique, with other guests too. Lucie and her father were there to witness the scene: Sonya cowering in a corner while Russia loomed over her like a big shadow, Liang, who was wincing hard, and China having an all-out martial arts fight, Canada and Jasmine aiding a punched-in-the-face Annabel, Selena's horrified expression as France approached with his lips, Shen and America's limp bodies on the floor, and Naomi trying to keep the katana out of Japan's reach.

Suddenly, the nations all aimed for Monique, but she was able to use her judo skills and knocked them all out with the wok.

"It pays to know judo," Monique sighed. "Let's take all the alcohol away and we'll wake these fools of drunkards up with water."

"You should have seen what we've went through," Selena groaned.

"Oh, we know," Violet nodded.

Whew! *wipes of sweat* Finally done! I got too carried away, I think. Anyway, this is like random, so I'm not sure if this is a filler...?

Next Chapter Summary: A glimpse of how the conversation between Mr. Fournier and Violet went. Plus, the nations reaction to what they did while they were drunk!

America: "Dude, I fought with England? No wonder why I have this bruise near my cheek and why my glasses are cracked!"

Japan: "Why would I bring out my katana?"

Me: "I don't know. Why don't you guys tell me?"