Chapter 14
Let Me In
Blaine goes and talks to Kurt the next day.
That is he is hoping to talk to Kurt when he shows up, unannounced with Elliott to band practice at Kurt's place ... half an hour early.
Kurt's appearance is dishevelled as he opens the door, wrapped tightly in a bathrobe, "Elliott, you are early. You are never early. What is ..., Blaine?"
"I need to talk to you," Blaine cuts to the chase.
"Um, okay?" The confusion and discomfort are clear in Kurt's features as he nevertheless steps aside and silently asks them to enter.
As the door closes and Kurt finds Blaine's gaze fixed on him he wraps first the robe then his arms tighter and tighter around himself, nervously running a single hand through his hair over and over, gaze sunk to the floor.
Only Blaine's hand reaching for his stops the motion.
Blaine has been afraid of this, as Kurt looks up his face is filled with pain again, his eyes, strands of loose hair hanging over them, obscuring the view from both sides, flooded with tears, already streaking thickly down his cheeks. He squeezes Kurt's hand tightly. "Are you afraid of me?" Blaine asks, pain burning in his chest.
"No," Kurt chokes out shaking his head.
"But you are afraid of something, right?" Blaine tries again.
It is no more than a whisper, "Too many things."
Blaine does not know what else to say or do, tries to trust his instinct and Wes's advice when he asks, "Can I hold you?"
"Blaine watches Kurt's right arm, still curled protectively around himself loosen a little as he chokes out the wet plea, "Please."
Elliott stands quietly, a few feet away by the couch, where he had retreated to instantly after they had entered the apartment. He offers his boyfriend a reassuring smile, an encouraging nod, as he catches Blaine's gaze, as Blaine keeps holding on to Kurt fiercely, buried now in his arms, head resting on Blaine's shoulder, face buried, still wet against Blaine's neck, breaths shaky at best. Running his own hand through Kurt's still damp hair, over and over, Blaine hums a soothing sound, nothing more. Eight whole minutes pass like this, only then, Kurt resting much more relaxed in his arms, Blaine speaks again.
"I am here for you. No matter what and when you need it. I am always here for you. As much as I possibly can be."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
When the doorbell rings, crushing the quiet still only just settling, Blaine, tightening his arms around Kurt, throws a look toward his boyfriend as he begins to guide Kurt towards the bathroom.
A moment after the small bathroom's door closes behind them they hear voices on the other side, exchanging greetings, a distinct question, "Where is Kurt?" And Elliott's answer, "He needs a couple minutes more, he just jumped out of the shower a while ago to let me in."
"Oh, okay."
They sit down together on the bathroom floor, backs resting against the door. Breathing settling, more winded thoughts returning, for better or for worse.
"Blaine?" Kurt's voice squeaks.
"Yeah?"
"Do you love me?"
Blaine's heart races for a couple moments at hearing those words, before his insides settle again and he answers calmly, "Of course I do, Kurt. Of course I do. You are one of my best friends."
"I am?"
The wonder carried in Kurt's voice asking this question cuts deep in a way Blaine himself does not fully understand. "You are."
"I think ... I love you too," Kurt whispers, burying himself deeper still in Blaine's embrace.
"Good," Blaine answers with a smile. "Very good."
"Very good," Kurt echoes into a new quiet settling around them, filled with a calm that had not been there before.
It will take them a good while longer tonight to get back up onto their feet, but neither man is bothered by the sounds of the band practice starting without them a moment later on the other side of that door. No one comes to bother them.
And Blaine smiles at the knowledge that Elliott always has his back.
And Blaine smiles at the feeling of Kurt's warm body resting relaxed in his arms.