TW for rape mention and implied suicidal ideation. This is pretty similar to my Ask Me Something story but I actualy wrote it before that one.
"Ask me something."
"What?"
"Anything."
"What are you afraid of?"
"Fire, burning. The dark. Nighttime - falling asleep."
"What else?"
"That I'm a monster. That nobody will ever love me, or that I can't love anybody."
"What about me?"
"Will you stay with me, though?"
"I don't know."
"What about you? What are you scared of?"
"Of doing the wrong thing, or that I've done the wrong thing. Of drowning. Of the people I love dying."
"I'm scared of being raped. Again."
"Again?"
...
"Why did you say again?"
...
"You can tell me."
"It was a long time ago."
"But it's still hurting you."
"They said it was...a search. That it happened to everybody."
"That's horrible."
"It was the time the king in his almighty wisdom chained me to the dungeon wall. The men set outside to guard me."
"Oh, gods. I'm so, so sorry."
"It wasn't...they just...but it hurt."
"That shouldn't have happened to you."
"The cowards wouldn't even unchain me so I could fight them. When I tried to get away, the metal tore the skin off my wrists."
"I'm so sorry."
"My wrists, they were scarred for weeks."
"Why didn't you tell the king?"
"He wouldn't have believed anything I said to him."
"No."
...
"God. I'm so sorry."
"I'm bored of your apologies. Ask me something else."
"What do you hate most about yourself?"
"Where do I start?"
"Don't be like that."
"You asked the question!"
"You don't have to answer it."
"I hate how I can kill without feeling anything. Sometimes at night I lie awake, making myself remember, trying to feel anything at all. Or counting - trying to quantify the misery I've caused. But I can't seem to feel. It's like I'm dead already."
"You seem fairly alive to me."
"You can be breathing, without being alive."
"What kind of a life is that?"
"The kind you sometimes hope somebody will end."
"Do you?"
"Don't you?"
"Sometimes."
"You haven't answered your question. What does the mighty sorcerer hate about himself?"
"I hate how I tried to kill you."
"Right."
"You don't believe me."
"It doesn't matter anymore."
...
"Ask me another question?"
"If you could have one thing in the whole world, just one. What would it be?"
"You."