Author's Notes: First, a thank you to Aphrodite who beta'd this and got it back quick! You are awesome.

I worked hard to convey a couple things in this chapter, It actually took a week of writing and re-writing, deleting and starting over, and I'm still not sure what I intended to get through is coming across, but I am sure you all will tell me if it doesn't. I will issue a word of caution here: Much of the text and dialogue in this chapter comes straight from Chapters 13-18 of "The Prince". If you have not read that one first, you may not understand what is going on here.

So, with that said, here it is.

The Prince: Absolution

Chapter 13

"Spock?"

Uhura hesitantly stepped into the darkened room. She hadn't seen or heard from him since he and Jim arrived back from the Narada.

She heard a voice call out.

"He is in his chambers, Ms. Uhura."

"Lights, twenty-percent."

The dim glow lit up the face of the Vulcan in front of her who had spoken. But it wasn't the face she wanted to see.

"Ambassador Sarek, I apologize. I should leave."

She turned to head to the door, but the Ambassador called out to her.

"Lieutenant, stay. I shall leave. My son needs you at this juncture."

She looked up, surprised by his comment, but he had already turned to the door, his back to her.

She watched as his frame was bathed in shadow from the glow of the corridor, the light pouring into the room from the open door. A moment later, he was gone.

It was quiet.

What was she doing here? What had she been doing all this time? She had bullied him into getting her on the Enterprise. She had kissed him again in the turbo lift, and again in the transporter room.

She had been full of his emotions. She had felt his turmoil. The hurt and the anger he had been fighting so desperately to control.

When she kissed him, she had felt the depths of his despair and sorrow and it flooded her senses, bringing her to the point of tears. He was so lost, fighting against himself and everything that had happened.

And, for some reason- she really didn't know why- she had felt she needed to be here. Something in her felt that she was being called.

She slowly made her way from the living area into his sleeping quarters.

"Spock?" she peered into the darkness and heard a voice uncharacteristically graveled and hollow.

"Please leave Nyota."

She felt pain radiating from him, and it overwhelmed her. She couldn't leave him. Not now.

"I'm not leaving you."

She began walking in the direction from which she had heard his voice.

"Lights, twenty-percent."

A dim glow illuminated the room just enough for her to make out his shadow.

She could tell he was sitting on the edge of his bed, hands clasped in front of him, head down.

He looked so despondent, so lost…

She moved beside him, and reached out to touch his hand.

She was literally knocked backwards by the level of the emotions swelling inside him. Hurt, confusion, anger, pain and guilt.

She closed her eyes, and forced herself to breathe. When she opened them, he was looking at her. His face a mask, but his eyes almost black and full of the inner turmoil he was experiencing.

"Why are you here?" he asked, his voice low.

"I am here because you need me. And I'm not letting you go. Not now."

He looked down at their hands, still clasped together.

"I have not treated you in the manner that you deserve. I have acted out of my own selfishness, with the misguided notion that what I've done was to your benefit-"

She cut him off as she moved against him, her body coming to straddle his lap, her arms wrapping around his waist. She pressed her lips to his and kissed him. She could feel his grief, it was so palpable.

As they kissed she felt his arms clench around her tightly as his body began to shake.

She held him tighter as he picked her up, and placed her down on the bed, coming to rest on top of her.

She heard his breath coming in pants, as the warm tears fell against her face.

Her hands caressed his back as she moved them down to grasp at his shirt. He was kissing her everywhere- her forehead, her nose, her cheeks, her lips…each kiss she felt more deeply than the last- his way of finding some sort of release…

She pulled off his shirt as he reached for hers, both shedding the clothes between their tangled limbs.

She could feel the heat of his body as he pressed his nakedness against her skin, his kisses growing more urgent and desperate, as if he were searching for something, anything to cling to that would stop him from drowning in the depths of his own despair…

When he entered her she let out a silent gasp and raised her legs, giving him the access to her entry point he so desperately sought- and she now craved.

He was so big, and he filled her, stretching her so that she bit back a small cry as her muscles involuntarily clenched around him.

She heard him let out a sob at the sensation as he felt the warm, wet heat surround his lok, pulling him in further.

He buried his head in her hair, attempting to anchor the emotions threatening to break through the fragile dam that had been holding them.

They lay like that for what felt like an eternity- he, anchored in her, his face buried in her hair. And she wrapped around him, her legs crossed at the ankles at the small of his back, her arms pulled tightly around his broad shoulders.

She kissed his face, raising her eyes from his lips to meet his, and what she saw left her breathless.

Spock- he who had risked his own life on a crumbling planet to save what he could of his home world- he who had dove head first on a suicide mission to save Earth from the same fate. He, who had lost his home, his mother and people…

His eyes were tinged green, brimming with tears still unshed, his pupils were large and black- those same eyes that had sparkled with such intensity before- now looked dead.

In her arms was a broken man and the sight cut into her heart as she began to cry for him. She pulled him tighter against her body and she felt the pressure of his hands as they gripped her hips, clinging to her so hard she knew there would be bruises as he forgot his own strength.

"Spock," The sorrow and grief she felt for him bursting through as she choked out his name through her tears.

They began to move.

He slowly drew out of her and she felt every twitch of every ridge and muscle of his lok against her inner walls. She was open to him and she felt her own wetness dripping down in his absence.

It wasn't gentle.

He returned to her with force, driving his lok deep into her. She cried out against his shoulder. He was so far into her she could feel him pulsing in her belly as he drew them both up until she straddled his lap once again. It was all she could do to hold on as he began to move her.

He gripped the backs of her thighs so hard she knew there would be bruises. He began to pound her-moving frantically- in…out…in…out… and she began to moan.

His mouth found hers again and she felt his body shake as the heat began to build between them- the friction shooting against her vulva, melting her core. He trembled, a shudder not born of orgasm but of the hurt that came with losing everything he held dear, and he began to sob.

She closed her eyes and rested her forehead against his, bracing against him. And it was as if…

She was suddenly swept up into his flood. She hadn't truly realized the depth of his grief and she cried out from the sheer agony he felt. She was drowning in his sorrow…and suddenly, a memory…

She watched as the matriarch entered, walking slowly towards them. Her hair, done up in an elaborate series of braids and twists has a single streak of white running through it, contrasting with its blackness. Her face was wrinkled, and her eyes piercing, but not unwelcoming. She wore the same expressionless mask as the rest.

Following the elder was another Vulcan, Ambassador Sarek. His robes were tailored to his body, made in rich hues of blues and greens. He looked positively royal.

And then- Spock and Amanda. She caught a breath as she stared at him. He wore the same colors as his father, but with streaks of gold embroidered into the pattern. He stood in the same posture, but the cut of this robe was much like that of his commander jacket. It fit perfectly on him, with a high neck that made him look absolutely regal.

They moved faster now and he drove into her harder, the depth of his emotional despair controlling him. They were crying together- she on the wave of emotions radiating from him as they coursed through her body, blending with her own grief over the loss of friends, of family, of Vulcan and six billion lives. Plus... one more, scattered and lost to the galaxy…

It was a scene she had never seen. And somehow in her fog she knew it could not be hers. She watched as two Vulcans lay on the stone floor the dampness of the chamber invading her senses…

She watched as Spock pinned the Vulcan woman down against the cold, stone floor, her rear exposed. She felt his radiant heat around her and watched as his fingers penetrated the woman. She heard him inhale…

"You have no choice Spock. You must have me. I am your only option. You need this now. Or you will die. You will have me." The force of her words struck Spock cold, and he released her.

"Are you a true Son of Surak? Your actions this day show you have been tainted by the off-world. Perhaps you reject me because you are inadequate. I have seen that human whore of yours. She cannot satisfy your need. It is as mine. We burn for each other. Do not fight it. To desire a human is not Vulcan. Are you human, or are you Vulcan?"

The sounds of sobs and grief broke through the silence that had previously been in the room-only magnified by the impact of their most intimate parts- the increasing slaps of skin-to-skin contact, the wet, sucking sounds their juices made as they mingled together as his lok continued to drive inside her.

She was approaching her peak now, fully engulfed in the odd sensation of pleasure and emotional pain as the fire between her thighs burned. Through her own tears, she saw his clearly…

The fortress had been built for a warrior people. As a defending structure, replete with hideaways and passages long lost to its current inhabitants. Except one. He used that knowledge now, climbing higher and higher…he had found and frequently used these tunnels as a boy. Now they served as the instrument to his success…she was close… He could smell her…he paused briefly, inhaling in the scent he'd been tracking amid the dampness of the walls…she was there…his ears perked, listening…soft breathing…slow, even…His blood was on fire, and he stumbled forward like an injured animal…soon it would be over…yes…there! He slipped into the darkened room, observing the small figure in front of him…he drew his fingers around her face…peace…peace…

As she embraced him, she felt the heat of his skin on hers, his stare, intent, passionate as he enveloped her , drawing them closer, and closer….His lips on her neck, his hands caressing her legs, moving around her thighs, seeking her permission for approval…yes, yes…she felt his kiss...so soft…so tender…so.. .the kiss…his body shifted on top of her…she gasped… the pressure increase, and she began to struggle…it was no longer passionate…he was crushing her …she whimpered now…trying to break free as hands grasped around her wrists…Spock…she was calling out to him, but he couldn't hear her…she was panicking…she was drowning… she was…

She watched as her own eyes flew open and it was all she could do to scream before white-hot flashes of light exploded behind them. Fear and pain coursed through her body. Her last sight – brown eyes, now glassy and black, empty, staring down at her.

His pace had sped up as a steady stream of sobs wracked his body and she could feel the approaching breakdown coming. His arms raised her high off of him and he began to slam into her with such force that she cried out.

She was drowning now with him, their joint hurt washing over them like the waves of the sea.

Her hands began to rake over his back, her nails digging into his flesh and it was his turn to cry out into the darkness around them. He brought his mouth down against the place where her neck met her shoulder…and bit.

'Your father is a traitor for marrying that human whore…'

'Oh look…he's getting all emotional.'

'What, are you going to cry, Spock?'

It was too much. Too many sensations. Too much feeling and she couldn't contain it all. She couldn't hold out for the both of them any longer.

She heard him moan her name repeatedly, like a prayer chant to the gods…

The sound brought the final climax and the heat that had been building for hours between them became an inferno, engulfing her like an explosion, the white-hot waves of orgasm coursing through her body so fast and hard that she began to shake uncontrollably.

Spock, come with me!'

'Nyota, I do not understand how you can justify my partaking of such an experience.'

"Spock! You act like I am asking you to dig your own grave! It's just swimming! Think of it as an adventure!" He raised his eyebrow at her but put his foot in the water. ...Fleeting impression followed: the sound the wooden beads in her hair made when she wore it in a traditional style… the way the bridge of her nose crinkled when she smiled… her sense of accomplishment as she mastered a particularly difficult dialect… the easy silence between them as they graded papers together… her never-ending quest to find the perfect combination of spices to make plomeek soup palatable… her sitting with her back against his chest as he repositioned her fingers on his lute…

The scene changed to them walking side-by-side near a large body of water.

She looked up at him and Spock felt warmth radiate through his body. Love. This must be love.

'Spock', she said softly, 'I love you.'

She couldn't blink, she couldn't focus, she could only shake as the tears flowed down her face, a single thought screaming through the body that was no longer under her control…

She threw her head back and let out the loudest scream she had ever had…And immediately blacked out.

The sound of his name from her lips took him over the edge as his emotional dam broke. He could feel her muscles clenching and releasing against him, causing his own body to quake through his own tears. He pumped her furiously, bringing his head down to her shoulders, his grip on her tightening further still. He heard her scream his name, the sound ringing in his ears and he was undone.

He couldn't fight against his own emotions any longer as his own orgasm crashed through him like a bolt of electricity and his head snapped back-his seed emptying deep inside her…

She was limp in his arms as he lowered her gently back on the bed. Her eyes were closed, her breath coming in ragged pants. He collapsed beside her and felt her burrow her head into his chest. He pulled her snugly against him.

The storm that had previously engulfed him was now a dull ache and he felt the calm that had eluded him for weeks beginning to take hold- Kaiidth.

She had found him when he was drowning and saved him. He gazed down at the sleeping form curled in his arms. It felt right.

He noticed his eyes were tight.

He raised a hand to his face, surprised that it was wet from tears- his own.

The emotional dam he'd forged for so long, now broken. It was strange that the emotions he'd fought so hard to repress had healed a part of him that had been dying- and she had pulled the release valve.

He felt a pang in his heart as he realized this moment with her wouldn't last forever.

Tomorrow…he thought, as the sound of her even breathing lulled him into sleep. I must tell her the truth. Tomorrow…


Words used:

1) Lok- penis

2) Kadiith- "What is, is." A form of acceptance.