Chapter Fourteen
I read Becca's message every day. The last time I saw her was one week ago, and then… She left the message and went away. I still can't believe it! The house is so empty without her. Her room still smells like her, but when I look at the sofa, when we watched the television, or when I go into the kitchen, when we made our cook-competition, or when I look at her guitar. And I hate having a breakfast alone. I miss the singing muffins, and her crazy ideas to make my day better. The house is empty without her, and I'm empty without her. I don't like to be home anymore, because without Becca my house in Westchester is just a house in Westchester, not my home.
- Why don't you call the cops? – Barney asks, while Robin is trying to make Rose sleep. The baby is crying really loud. Poor Robin, she looks very tired. Barney too, but they're helping me, and I'm so thankful for them. – I mean… She disappeared a day ago. You should have report it.
- I don't think so. – I say. – She told me, she's not going to arrive at home for days.
- Yeah, but one week passed…
- God, our little princess is one week old. – Robin says with a proud blink at the crying baby. – Hear you, Rosie? You're one week old. – she babbling. Hearing Robin babbling is really weird. – You're such a big girl! Do you know, what we're going to do? I'm taking you to your bed, and you're going to sleep. – she's going out of the room with the infant. Barney following them with his eyes.
- Wow. – I say. – I never thought Robin will acting with a child like she's acting now.
- Me neither. – Barney says. – I don't know, what happened to her head, but she really likes to being a mother. During the pregnancy she panicked about her career, she wanted to read the news as septimestris pregnant, and after we married, she cried every day, that the child is going to ruin our life. But I think, although the life of a parent is very hard, in some crazy way she likes doing it. And me too. Rosie is the greatest little girl in the planet. – he's smiling. – Okay, it was obvious, because she's a Stinson, and her parents are hundred-procent-awesome, but I never thought, that a more-than-half-canadian child could be so awesome. – there's a short silence. – Why didn't you try? – he asks.
- Try what?
- Try to find Becca. – I'm thinking a bit, and then answering.
- Because I'm afraid. – Barney is nodding.
- I can understand it. But I think, Becca would be happy, if you meet again.
- No, Barney. She hates me. I hurted her, and she dosen't want to see me.
- Oh, that's stupid! – Robin says, when she's coming back. – Only the crybabies can be hurted as much as you think Becca is hurted now abut a little thing. But I think, our Rosie could hold it better, than she. I think, she screams to you to find her.
- No, I don't think so. It's… Not so simple as you think.
- Ted. – Robin says. – Love stories are simple.
- Not always.
- The thing which make it complicated for you is your mind. But we, who aren't in love with Becca, we know, that you should have to find her. – Robin says.
- She has right, Ted. – Barney is looking at me. – Look, Becca overreacted the thing, because she's in love with you. So whatever you do, it means to her. The reason, why she feels hurted, that she's in love with you, and she wants to see you a good person. And chucking off Val's gift was a mean action. She doesn't know to trust you or not anymore. You have to show you care about her, and you love her.
- So if you don't try to find her, she's going to think that you're a jerk, and she really won't get back to you. – Robin is ending the thought. – But you make the decision. If you abscond from your problems like a chicken, then do it. – Barney is looking at Robin enthralled blink.
- Wow. The ending was ruthless. – he says.
- I know.
- I love you so much! – he says, and kissing Robin. I see their happiness. And then I'm thinking about Becca. Maybe they have right. Maybe I should have find her. But I don't know, where to begin.
A half hour later
- So do you ask us for help to find a women, who could be everywhere in the world? – Lily asks. I'm nodding. – Great!
- I don't know… Does your sixth sense say something?
- Well… Nothing interesting. Do you know any of Becca's favorite places?
- Maybe the coffe shop, where we first met after the wedding.
- Do you think she's waiting for you at the coffeshop since a week?
- I don't know. Maybe we can ask a waiter. – I say. Lily is nodding.
An hour later we're standing next to the coffe shop. Lily is drinking water, she can't have a coffe because the pregnancy, and I'm drinking an espresso. We met a waitress, but she said she'll help me after we bought some coffe.
When we were ending, I'm going back to the waitress.
- So, do you want to speak now? – I ask. I feel myself like the bad cop in the movies. Lily is standing next to me glowering the waitress . She's nodding. – Did you see a women in the coffeshop during the passed week, who was as tall as Lily, with brown hair and brown eyes in colored chlothes?
- Like a million. – she answers. I didn't want to hear that answer.
- But she's one of your resorters.
- What's her name? – she asks.
- Rebecca Bluebell.
- No… I don't think Becca has been here in the passed week. – she says with a friendlier tune than before. – I'm sorry. We're going away, when she's starting to speak again. – Are you Ted? – she asks. I'm nodding. – God luck! – she says.
I can't believe for my ears. Where did she know my name?
Seems like Lily doesn't care about it.
We're moving to the next place where Becca usually goes, her office. She's working near to my old workplace, it's funny. We could met sooner, if I'm better at timing.
The first person, we see is her collegine, Sandra. She's a nice short girl with black hair.
- So do you want to find Becca? – she asks. I'm nodding. – I don't know, where she is, she took a day off.
I'm nodding, and then Lily and I are going away.
I'm really confused. This is the first time, when I'm realizing I really could lose Becca. Maybe I've almost lost. I don't want to thinking about it. But I can't stop thinking about it. Everywhere I look I see her. I want to find her so much, but I feel I lost my mind with her. I need her. I can't imagine how I lived before I met her. I know, it's stupid, but I think, she's the One. I just know it. I can't stop thinking about it. She's my best friend, and my soulmate in one. I just can't wait to live my life with her. But now it fell apart. I messed all up. I want to believe to Robin and Barney, that Becca overreacted what I did, because she is in love with me, but I can't believe it. And I was such an idiot' I should have starting to search her the first day, she disappeared! I don't know, where she is, and I'm really nervous. What if she's in danger? I'm just so stupid.
How could I let her go?
I'm such a big idiot! I want to get a slap for myself, just I don't know how to do it.
Four hours later
It's late night. Lily and I are very tired. We searched Becca everywhere; almost in every street of New York, we went to her hairdresser, to the shop where she bought the most of her clothes, to the animal shelter, I don't know why, we asked about her in the supermarkets, I called her parents, I tried everything, but seems like Becca is gone forever. I'm a bit depressed right now, and Lily is very-very tired. She's such an amazing person. She went with me just to help find Becca and make me happy. I know, she's sad to. Lily is the most emphatic person I've ever knew.
We're arriving at Lily's and Marshall's place.
- Ted? – Lily says. – Do you want to sleep in our sofa? – she asks. I know, why she offers me this. She see that I don't want to go home, because alon I everything is worse. I had six terrible nights in myhouse alone, and I missed Becca better. I don't know, what to do, I want to get her back… Whatever, I'm accepting the offer.
When we're arriving at their apartament, Marshall and marvin are sleeping.
Lily says good night to me, and the last thing I remember for the day that I'm laying in the sofa and thinking about how to overtake Becca.
In the next day
I'm waking up, and realize I sleep too much. Marshall is at work, Lily is cooking the dinner, Marvin is playing with Barney, Robin and Rosie.
- Hi, guys! – I say.
- Hi, Sleeping Beauty. – Barney says with a sarcastic smile. – What did you dream about?
It's complicated. I dreamt that I'm in a field, at night, and I see the moon. Becca is sitting in the moon, and singing. I know the song for somewhere, but I don't know where. She says if I say how is the song called, she'll go back to me. But I don't remember.
- I don't know. – I say. – I don't remember exactly. Why are you here?
- We're babysitting. – Robin says. We help to Lily why she's cooking the dinner.
- And have a dinner together. – Barney says. – We do it every Sunday.
- It sounds good. – I say with a smile on my face. Lily is arriving to the livingroom.
- Oh, Ted! You woke up. Finally! We thought you died.
- Thank you. – I say sarcastic.
- How is Marvin? – Lily asks.
- He's fine. – Robin answers. – You know, that I can hold a two-years-old very well.
- Yes, this is why I asked.
- And how are the twins? – Robin asks. – Do you know their gender?
-A boy and a girl. – Barney says in a serious voice.
- No, not exactly. – Lily says. – The doctor said, both of them are going to be boys.
- Then they're a boy and a girl. – Robin says. – The doctor told me, Rosie is a boy. But she's not a boy, she's a beutiful little girl. – she starts bubbling again. I can't settle down it.
- Okay, let's make a deal! – Barney says with a smile. – If they're a boy and a girl, you'll call them Barney and Robin to advertise our awesomeness.
- Okay, and if I win, and I probably will, you're going to be my babysitters forever. Whatever happens, you'll be there and babysitting my three sons.
- Deal! – Robin, and Barney says.
- Deal! – Lily says.
Lily is shaking her hand with Robin and then with Barney. They made the bet.
While they're talking, I'm thinking about Becca. She left me a message. I decided I'm going to leave her a message too. But how? I want she to get the message without meet me. And where's she if she's not at home, not at work, not at her favorite places… She bought the car. Yeah, that's it! She's driving.
I hear a song in my head, but I don't remember how it's called. And then I realize it.
An hour later
We're eating some delicous meal, and talking.
- Hey. – I say. I try to pretend I'm not annoyed. – Why don't we listening to the radio?
- Because we're in 2014? – Barney asks back. Robin is laughing.
- Okay, but…
- Is it something about Becca? – Lily asks. I'm nodding. – Then… - she says with a sigh. – Let's listening to the radio!
She takes her laptop, and we're streaming the radio online. I'm really thankful to her. Lily is just fantastic.
Hello, everyone! You're hearing the Send a song for someone!, when we make your dreams come true. Our first telephoner is Ted from Westchester, who wants to send a song for Becca, who left him in the next week. His message is: „Do you remember? I can't fight against it alone, I need your help. I hope, you hear me." How sweet, am I right? Then let's hear what did Ted send to Becca.
- Did you phone a radio station? – Lily asks with a surprised face.
- And every another radio station in America. – I say. – I hope, Becca is listening to one of them.
- And what is the song you sent to her? – Robin asks. – What's you can't fight against?
- It's a very special song for us. – I say. – When we first met, she thought this is a song about me.
How to fight loneliness
Smile all the time
Shine you teeth til meaningless
Sharpen them with lies
And whatevers going down
Will follow you around
Thats how you fight loneliness
You laugh at every joke
Drag your blanket blindly
Fill your heart with smoke
And the first thing that you want
Will be the last thing you ever need
Thats how you fight it
Just smile all the time
Just smile all the time
Just smile all the time
Just smile all the time
- Do you think, she heard it? – Lily asks, when the song ended.
- I don't know. I'm answering. – I hope so.
And our next telephoner is called Becca from Westchester, who wants to send a song for Ted. Her message is: „You don't have to fight anymore. You won." And here's the song:
- Seems like she heard it. – Barney says.
I've paid my dues (And I need just go on and on, and on, and on) We are the champions, my friends, I've taken my bows But it's been no bed of roses, (And I need just go on and on, and on, and on) We are the champions, my friends, We are the champions, my friends,
Time after time.
I've done my sentence
But committed no crime.
And bad mistakes ‒
I've made a few.
I've had my share of sand kicked in my face
But I've come through.
And we'll keep on fighting 'til the end.
We are the champions.
We are the champions.
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions of the world.
And my curtain calls
You brought me fame and fortune and everything that goes with it
I thank you all
No pleasure cruise.
I consider it a challenge before the whole human race
And I ain't gonna lose.
And we'll keep on fighting 'til the end.
We are the champions.
We are the champions.
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions of the world.
And we'll keep on fighting 'til the end.
We are the champions.
We are the champions.
No time for losers
'Cause we are the champions.
It was 'We are the champions' from Queen. I don't know, what she exactly wanted, but I don't care.
It's Ted again, he's sending a song for Becca, and his message is: „Our home is empty without you. Please drive back as soon as you can."
Well, this is just a simple song,To say what you done.
I told you 'bout all those fears,And away they did run.
You sure must be strong,And you feel like an ocean being warmed by the sun.
When I was just nine years old,I swear that I dreamt,Your face on a football field,And a kiss that I kept,Under my vest.
Apart from everything,But the heart in my chest.
I know that things can really get rough,When you go it alone.
Don't go thinking you gotta be tough,And bleed like a stone.
Could be there's nothing else in our lives so critical,As this little home.
My life in an upturned boat,Marooned on a cliff.
You brought me a great big flood,And you gave me a lift.Girl, what a gift.
When it's ended, I'm hearing the anchor again.
How surprising, Becca phoned us to send a nice song for Ted, and her message is: „I'm at home, waiting for you." C'mon Ted, don't waste time!
- Guys, this is boring. – Barney says. Lily and Robin are looking at me.
- Why are you wasting your time, Ted? – Lily says. – Run!
I'm turning back, and strating to run.
- Good luck! – I hear Robin's voice, but after that I'm trying to run as fast as I can.
I'm catching a taxi and ask the driver to drive very fast.
- Are you Ted? – he asks. I say yes.
- But where are you know? – I'm asking back.
- I'm listening to the radio. – he answers. – I'm going to drive as fast as I can. – he says.
- Thank you.
A few moments later I'm front of our house in Westchester, and looking at our door. I see, Becca's car is parking next to the house. She's really at home. I can't believe it. I really can't believe it.
She came back.
I'm opening the door. Becca is standing in the livingroom in a glow, she's looking at me.
I could say so many things, but I wouldn't be meaning. I mean. I just want to do it and don't ruin it. And although I want to say a lot of things, I can't say anything.
Becca is looking at me, and smiling.
Then I'm kissing her.
- Never go away. – I say.
- I don't want to. – she answers. – I love you Ted. And not as a friend, if you know what I mean.
- I know. – I say, and hugging Becca. – And I love you too. – Becca is starting to laugh. – What is?
- Nothing just… We were so stupid.
- I don't care. – I say. – Do you think am I still that lonely person from the song?
- No. – she answers. – Ted, I told you. You won. I don't want to leave you alone, so you never will. If you smile, it'll be a real smile, not a fake.
I'm smiling. For real.
Becca is looking at me, and kissing me again. And then again.
I want to stop the second or leave it over and over again. Or leave as good life with Becca, as this moment is.
Because I think, I'm the luckiest person in the world.