Chapter 14

I feel so bad!

I broke my promise!

I cut again!

I'm so weak… I can't even stop cutting…

Albus can't ever find out, he'd be so disappointed! I couldn't bear seeing him like that!

I was lying in bed, curtains drawn, and was looking at my arms.

I groaned. I'm so ugly… See? I ate something and I'm already getting chubby! Well, I didn't promise Albus I wouldn't vomit anymore, so… I won't be breaking any rules…

I quietly got out of bed and crept all the way to the bathroom.

I entered and locked the door behind me. I rushed over to the toilet and pushed my fingers down my throat.

After I was done, I got up to clean my mouth. When I looked up at the mirror, I saw someone standing behind me.

"Albus…" I whispered.

"Scorp, I'll talk to you about this later." He looked sad and disappointed. His expression turned to worry, though, when he continued. "Ricky is not in his bed. I haven't seen him since dinner and I'm worried."

"You're sure he's not in his bed?"

"His bed looks like no one's been sleeping in it. Scorp we should go search for him!"

"Sure, let's go," I said, knowing we were going to get in trouble for this.

-o-O-o-

Ricky's PoV (Didn't see that coming huh? :3)

I woke up with a throbbing headache.

Where was I? What happened?

I groaned.

"Ricky?" I heard a female voice say.

"Rose," I croaked, attempting to sit up.

"No, stay like this. Ricky… What have you done? You could've died if I hadn't stopped the bleeding!"

"I'm sorry," I whispered, tears starting to fall from my eyes. I covered my face in Rose's lap (I was resting my head in her lap).

"Ssssh… It's okay… Why did you do it?" Rose asked soothingly.

"I don't know… Whenever I feel pain, emotional pain, I cut myself. It's the only way the pain is kinda relieved. Please don't think I'm a freak… Today, when Damon said he wasn't my friend anymore, I felt heartbroken. I lost him… The one I love… My friend… I lost him… I needed to cut, Rose… But this time was different… I felt like I needed to really punish myself, rather than just relieving the pain. When Damon said he hated me because I'm gay, I felt like vermin. Something not worth living…"

"Ricky, listen to me," she said, looking at me with sadness. "You should never feel like this! You are an amazing person, whether you're gay, straight, bi or even into bestiality! You are handsome, funny, smart… Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise, please…"

"Thanks Rose," I whispered, sniffling.

"Just stating the facts, but you're welcome," she said, smiling.

"Rose?" I asked.

"Yes?"

"Why does Damon hate gay people?"

"I don't know, but it's very dumb… I don't know why homosexuality is not accepted yet," she replied sadly.

It was silent for a while, before Rose spoke up again: "What are you going to do now?"

"I don't know… Probably go to bed and cry. Then in the morning I get up extra early and avoid Damon and hope he won't hurt me anymore. How can I fall in love with a person like that?" I became furious. Furious at myself, that is.

"Damon won't hurt you. I won't let him. You've experienced yourself how dangerous I can be," she smiled evilly. "Love is a strange and unexplainable phenomenon," she answered my other question. "You should probably forget about him, how difficult it may be…"

"I suppose…"

"I think we need to get up to the castle again," Rose suggested.

"We should, but I'm too tired to stand," Ricky said.

"Alright, we'll sleep here." She started running her fingers through my brown hair.

"Thanks again, Rose," I said, before drifting off to sleep.

-o-O-o-

"Ouch! Al, watch your step!" Scorpius said angrily.

"Sorry! We're just too big to both fit under the Invisibility Cloak!"

"I figured," Scorpius huffed.

They'd been looking for Ricky all over the castle. He was nowhere to be found.

"Al, I'm getting cold. Let's just go back to our dormitory… He'll turn up, I promise."

"Here," Albus said, handing Scorpius his hoodie. He put it on over his white shirt. It was still warm and it smelt like Albus: delicious.

"We need to keep searching. If you're really cold you can go back, though," he said, looking at me worried.

I didn't want to leave Albus, but I needed to go back. My arm was itching and I was incredibly tired. I knew that I wouldn't sleep for a while anyway, but I still wanted to go back. Ricky would turn up soon enough. Not that I didn't care if he disappeared, but I just thought he was taking a stroll around the castle to clear his mind or something. I knew from experience it helped.

"Al, I'm going back," I said, getting the Cloak off of me. "I'm sorry, but I don't want to get in trouble and I think Ricky will soon enough turn up. Good luck searching for him, though."

Albus only looked at me with a shocked expression. Wait, no, he wasn't looking at me, but over my shoulder. I slowly turned around, already knowing what was going to happen.

I was right.

Professor Kellington and Filch were standing right in front of me, Kellington looking furious and disappointed and Filch looking victorious.

I swallowed.

"Fuck…" I whispered.

"What do you think gives you the right to sneak around the castle at this hour?!" Professor Kellington nearly shouted.

"I'm sorry Professor, I was just going back to my dormitory."

"Potter, I know you're there."

Albus poked his head out from under the Cloak. "H-Hi, Professor…"

"Finally, some justice!" Filch barked in glee.

Professor Kellington looked at him annoyed. "I can take it from here, Argus. You can leave now."

"B-But I wanna see some punishment!" Filch said disappointed.

"Goodnight, Mister Filch," Professor Kellington smiled sweetly.

Filch shuffled away angrily, muttering incoherently under his breath.

Albus stifled a laugh, causing Professor Kellington to direct his attention to us again.

"I wouldn't laugh that hard, Mister Potter. I'm not done with you two. Go to bed now, I will speak to you tomorrow," he said, before walking away.

"We're in deep trouble…" I groaned.

This is the last update for three weeks! I'm leaving tomorrow morning, so yeah… I hope y'all stay glam and I'll keep writing in Spain, posting it as soon as I get back bc no wifi and shit. So, please bear with me :3

Please tell me what your favorite chapters were till now and what you thought of this one!

Byeeee!

P.S. I'm sorry this is a little short! :$