N/A: Okay guys, I feel like the last few chapters have lacked in quality, so I've taken some time to write this one for that purpose. I will be revising the chapters as soon as this story is finished.

Without further ado, I proudly present chapter fourteen: Of Late And Lost!

Chapter Fourteen: Of Late and Lost

Robin Pov

JLA Watchtower

*Flashback*

Atop a giant T in the middle of a small island in the bay sat a girl, shrouded in darkness and only the waning crescent moon reflected the shadows. Her purple cloak concealed her figure, and when it swayed in the light breeze she hugged it closer. I stood watching for a moment, awed by the sight, then settled down beside her and looked at the moonlit bay. She spoke first.

"Do you ever feel like maybe without us, the bad guys wouldn't come out to fight? Maybe we are the reason for the crime, we antagonize them to try."

"I've thought about that a few times," I admitted.

"You can't have God without the Devil, and vice versa. Without the Devil, God wouldn't be needed; And without bad, there would be no need for heroes like us."

"Are you alright? I mean lately... especially after your father... you don't seem like the Raven I know. You seem like you're in the grey, ready to dive either way."

"I'm fine, just tired of the same old thing. Fighting this... saving that..." Raven pulled back her hood and let it collapse behind her, her eyes staring at the waves of the ocean as it crashed lightly against the shore beneath us. She sighed.

"If you ever need to talk, I'll always be there for you," I stood and turned for the door back inside the tower.

"I know, but you've saved me enough."

I turned to see her disappear in her black ora, probably teleporting back to her room.

*End Flashback*

Raven Pov

Otta, Norway

"...But I never thought it would change you so drastically. The Toxin targeted your pent-up anger and it didn't help that you had so much of it. I thought that the Toxin would affect you differently because you're a half demon, but I was wrong," Slade sat back comfortably on the white plush chair, swirling his drink in his hand.

"So why? Why make me your apprentice? Out of everyone you could have chosen... What made me so special?" I sat on the opposing chair, my legs laying beside me over the arm, my drink sat on the coffee table.

"I had already failed with Robin, and you are his equal. Not only that, but if I'm correct, you didn't want to play hero anymore either," Slades' lone eye staring into my very soul, if I even had one.

"Hmph," I leaned my head back against the arm of the chair. The ceiling caught my gaze, but only for the split second between reality and the sea of memories that had always plagued my mind.

"I don't know if it's reversible. It's possible that it will wear off after so long, it could take months or it could take years," Slade said thoughtfully.

"But what if it doesn't?" I asked, bring my head back to face him, sullenness tugged at my lips.

"Then you will forever have overactive emotions, but your anger is another story entirely. You've always held yourself back by not allowing yourself to feel that emotion, and that's why you've never had control of it. You need to experience your emotions, you know, the ones you keep bottled up inside. Once you allow yourself to feel them, you will understand them. And only then can you have true control of them," Slade took a sip of the golden liquor, his lips twisting slightly from the taste, then he sighed and set it gently next to my matching drink on the coffee table.

"I'm going to bed," I declared, partly from anger, rising with a stretch I headed down the hall.

"You realize its two in the afternoon, don't you?" Slade snickered.

"Yes, and I don't care, I didn't get much rest last night."

I walked into the first bedroom, since I had already slept there last night, and shut the door. My clothes, which had suffered dearly, needed to be thrown away. I still had that blue long sleeve shirt and jeans on, but they were smelly and discussing. I stripped them off and searched for something else to wear. Sadly, the dresser only contained giant male button up shirts. I grabbed a black one, which I'd noticed was worn and a few of the buttons were missing, and threw it on. Then I found a pair of grey adjustable sweatpants and put them on.

Once dressed, I plopped in bed under the plush covers. How dare he try to tell me how to feel. How dare he say I'm not to my full potential.

He is stupid and doesn't understand me, I concluded. Not only does he not understand, but he doesn't care. He's just trying to cover his ass.

Wouldn't want his willing apprentice to be pissed at him, now would we?

But was it really so bad? A voice in the back of my head rang, an imoticlone of mine; Rage. She continued, No, it wasn't. You enjoy it, every minute of it. You enjoyed almost killing Robin, you enjoyed watching that scum Black Mask die at Deathstrokes hand. You like being bad because you'd been good for too long.

And do you know what else I'm tired of? I asked the clone in a cynical tone, then continued, People telling me what I feel and why.

But I'm not a real person, I'm yourself, she argued.

Well thats another reason why I'm not listening to you, because your biast.

I swear, if punching my emotions didn't hurt I would do that more often...

But it does hurt you so...

Shut up!

A pillow exploded beside me, causing me to jump. With an aggravated sigh I hopped up and stomped out of the room. If Slade wanted to put me in a bad mood he better be ready to face it.

"Slade!" I called out. I walked down the hall to the kitchen, where I found him leaning causally with his back against the counter.

"What?" He asked evenly.

"You know what! If it wasn't for you I would have had a normal life. I would have left the Titans and became a citizen and created a life-" I was interrupted.

"You would have turned dark either way. As much as you don't want to admit it, you wouldn't be able to stay away," He returned, pushing off the counter to tower above me, trying to intimidate me.

"I would have stayed away, but now the mind control CRAP that YOU put in ME makes me do differently. Even if I tried now I wouldn't be able to override it!"

"I didn't put that much in, you know that, I told you the truth earlier!"

"You ruined my LIFE, Slade, can't you see that?!" Both of us unknowingly had taken steps closer to the other, another form of intimidation.

"You ruined your own life by not seeing all that I did for you! I trained you, I gave you a roof to live under, I fed you. And now look how ungrateful you are!"

"Ungratefull?! I was being manipulated by YOU. You used me!"

"You allowed yourself to be used, you were stupid and naïve!"

"I am not stupid!" We were inches apart now, and I wanted to kill him. I was so angry that I wanted to explode.

Then, in one swift movement, he gripped the back of my neck and pulled his lips to mine. For a moment I was shocked, I wasn't able to move. But I quickly recovered and my anger melted into passion. I closed my eyes and kissed greedily back.

I stirred and stretched, apparently I had fallen asleep in a bed. My eyes fluttered open softly, my sight was blurred and there was no light on. What little I could see was only allowed by my half demon eyes. I numbly felt around for any sense of memory of before this. The soft blankets layed limp at the end of the bed and I was completely naked.

When did I go to bed?

My hands glided along the mattress away from me until it hit something warm and rough. I felt it more and discovered the rough substance was worn and weathered skin; it was an arm.

The only other person in the base was Slade.

Slade!

Why was I naked in bed with Slade?!

Then it hit me like an Atomic bomb! We didn't do anything, did we?

"Oh Azar..." I mumbled in shock.

Slade began to stir. I levitated off the bed in order not to wake him and felt my way out of the dark room. The hallway was visible, though barely, and I made my way to the bathroom. I swiftly shut the door and flicked on the lights.

The first sight of me was frightening; My hair was knotted and ratty, my eyes had dark sleep-deprived bags underneath them, and deep red blotches had formed around my neck and chest. My face was another thing, it felt foreign. The disgusted look slapped acrossed my face was hideous. My eyes were distant, otherwise distracted. My mouth and nose were twisted into a sneer, but only at my self.

Why had I stooped so low?

Why hadn't I stopped him, me, whoever's fault this was?

I curled up in the corner with a towel and cried. I tried to keep it concealed by burying my face in the towel but it didn't work as well as I wanted it too. I don't know how long I stayed like that. Minutes? Hours? But long enough to fall asleep.

However, again, I woke up in bed. My towel was replaced by a warm bedsheet and thick blankets. A light was on, though just dim enough for one to sleep. But Slade was nowhere to be seen. I slightly prefered that.

I sighed and sat up. Why hadn't I been able to control myself? I felt horrible. In the pit of my stomach I felt bile start to rise and churn. I closed my eyes and tried to calm down. I got up slowly and quietly, listening for a strain of noise. Breathing, footfalls, or anything of the sort; nothing was heard. I scanned the ground for my clothes, which were strewn in various places on the floor.

Heat fled to my cheeks; we must have been in a rush.

I pulled on my clothes slowly, my muscles were sore and restricted from movement. I pulled the door open, luckily it didn't squeak. I snuck through the hall past the kitchen, towards the door that let out of the compound. I didn't walk through it though, I rested my forehead on the cool metal door. I closed my eyes and pictured where I wanted to go.

I couldn't stay here, not with him. Not now, anyway.

"Raven," His voice causes me to jump; I didn't pay enough attention to if I was being watched. I don't speak for several seconds, but when I do it was cold.

"What?" I spit.

I turned to face him. His expression wasn't what I expected it to be, it was soft.

We stare at each other for a moment; I felt like his look should be scolding, because that's all I have ever known from Slade. But I see regret and sorrow in his eyes. W didn't speak, but I felt like he wanted to say something. What did he see in my eyes? On my face?

"I'm sorry," Was all he could say.

"I..." I bursted into tears before I could say anything else and drop to my knees. Slade knelt down by me and put his hand on my back, as reassurance.

Teary eyed, I look up at him. I carry a heavy burden, one of pain and of regret. I made mistakes, a lot of them. And most of them I regret. I get my pain from all of those mistakes. They bathe in my hopes and dreams and twist them into something fake.

He cupped my face in his hands and kisses me, and in one moment, I can't remember. I can't remember why I hurt. I can't remember what I regret. I just see the look in his eye and I felt something. It was strange, like I took a dephibrilater to the heart.

Robin PoV.

JLA WatchTower

When I woke up from my wild dreams and memories, I cried. I am not a child, I should not cry. But I did. When my sniffles stops, batman entered my room. He looked at me, very mono-faced as he always was.

"The Justice League wants to hear your side of the story. Strictly what you remember," He pulled up a chair and sat down staring intently at him.

I resight my memory, little did I know I would have to say it twenty more times that night.