AN: I'm sorry that compared to the last two chapters, this is shorter, so i'm sorry about that, but it was split the chapter here or i feel i wouldn't of had enough time to finish the chapter to the ability i would of liked by the end of the week and i don't want to keep you guys waiting ever! I hope you enjoy it all the same, comments are always welcome, thank you again to everyone that always does comment.
AN2: WARNING Some Sexual content in this chapter. Not a lot though.
AN3: Speaking of sexual content, how do my readers feel about this, feel free to PM if you don't want to say in the review, i'd just like to know? if its split i could post a clean and not clean version of the chapters, please again all comments and PM's welcome. many thanks.
I gradually wake out of my slumber, I have yet to open my eyes as I don't want to believe that it's my time to wake up yet, I squeeze my eyes further shut trying to convince myself that I am yet to wake, this is all a dream and that I will soon be back in the land of nod. I often have little conversations with myself when I wake in the morning, this one is no different. My head feels heavy. I try to slightly stretch out my muscles but fail terribly my body is not awake enough for that yet. I feel more rested than I have in a long time, but I ache everywhere. When did I come to bed, I don't remember that.I think to myself as I can feel thick material on my face. I'm hugging my quilt, sign of a lonely and desperate lady that is. My arms wrapped around the material, one arm underneath. The other draped over the top, the rest of my body stays uncovered except for my legs, my quilt is draped over my legs, it feels warm, I they to move my legs from under it but it's too heavy. That's weird. I tense all of my muscles around the quilt so I can relax them and maybe just maybe feel a little relief from the ache that seems to of overcome my entire form. I hear a small Moan. My eyes snap open. Arizona? I don't move an inch. My head pressed into the middle of her back. Why is she in my bed? I don't remember us coming to my bed. I lift my head and take in my surroundings; we are still in the sofa bed in the living room. We must of fell asleep watching movies.
I try to pull my arm from over her to see if I can remove myself without waking her but in her sleep she grabs my hand entwines our fingers and pulls our hands close to her chest. I try to pull it away once more but her grip only gets tighter, I glance over to the window and she that it is broad daylight outside, I know I should wake her up but she's holding me close and something about me just doesn't want this moment to end, I shift my body slightly so that my head is sharing the same pillow as Arizona's. My arm is still under her neck, her legs draped over mine. She's holding my hand in hers. Sharing a moment like this with her, it feels just like when we used to share lazy Sundays on the sofa at the apartment. I know I should let go of this but I don't want to. I squeeze her slightly in my arms, I hear her let out a sign of content, my heart melts and it's decided I'm staying right here. In this moment for as long as I can. I close my eyes and let myself fall back to sleep.
I hear a loud groan that brings me out of my hazy rest, I didn't really get back to sleep, half in half out really. She tightens her hold on my hand and pulls it further around her. She drops my hand and turns in my arms.
Arizona: Are you up?
She whispers as she runs her finger across my forehead and behind my ear tucking a stray strand of hair away. I am about to speak when she says something else.
Arizona: You are too beautiful.
I wanted to pretend that I was asleep but I couldn't help the smile that tugged at me lips.
Arizona: So you are up?
Callie: Nope.
I pop the 'p' to emphasize my point and keep my eyes closed I hear her chuckle and I can't help but smile wider. She bops my nose with the pad of one of her fingers. And I let my eyes flutter open. When they do they are looking into the clear blue eyes.
Arizona: Good morning.
She smiles that amazing dimpled smile at me and I am mush.
Callie: Morning.
I give her a weak smile; this feels to easy to natural, to… normal. Like the past five years never even happened, it's amazing, it feels like I am home, I am euphoric. Until I remember, every bad night, every sleepless night, every night I cried myself to sleep, every morning I woke up in an empty bed. And I can't help but feel uncomfortable holding her being scrutinized by her gaze. I can tell that she has noticed the falter in my mood because her eyes give me a quizzical look.
Callie: I'm sorry, I'm all over you, I'll erm… I'll just get off.
I try to move my arm away from her body but she stops me.
Arizona: It's nice.
Callie: It's not too… Familiar?
Arizona: We've known each other for years; we've been a lot more familiar than this in the past.
I laugh at her candor and she joins me, at the same time she keeps a protective arm over mine making sure I don't move it away.
Callie: I know but isn't it too soon for this, I've only been back in your life for like 36? Hours. What time is it?
She leans over behind herself and taps the lock button on her phone. 3:37pm. She lifts it to show me and I quickly try to do the math.
Callie: 40ish hours.
I correct myself.
Callie: Wow that's later than I expected.
Arizona: It doesn't feel like you ever went away.
Callie: Same… but isn't that just a little bit scary.
Arizona: Very. But it's nice.
She takes her hand and places it over my exposed hip and squeezes while slightly pulling me towards, I feel a surge of heat hit me just a little south of where her hand sits, she still knows how to get to me. I cough trying to hide the breath that has just hitched in my throat. I swallow hard.
Callie: But-
She moves her body close to mine and places her face directly in front of mine, if I move even a millimeter her lips would be on mine.
Arizona: But what?
She moves in to kiss me but I use every ounce of will power I have and I take my arm from around her place it on her shoulder and push her back only the slightest amount.
Callie: But. I think we need to take our time with this I don't want to push anything; I want to get it right this time. We're not even.. I mean, we're not even a 'we're' 'us' or whatever how can we do this?
Arizona: I think you are far too worried about labels.
Callie: Maybe. I just don't wanna screw this up.
Arizona: Me either.
Callie: So?
Arizona: So I still want to kiss you.
Callie: I want to kiss you too.
Arizona: Then do it, take what you want Calliope.
With that I cant stop myself, all the want and need I have been holding back, everything that's been running through my mind and body since I can remember and I crash my lips into hers and my arm drapes back over her side. I place my hand on her back pulling her body closer to mine. Her hands lost in my hair, kissing her more deeply than I can ever remember kissing her I lay her on her back and rest part of my body on hers, I feel one of her hands fall from my hair and run down my back, when she reaches my boxers I feel her slip her fingers just below the hem I stop her hand as its about to plunge down and grab my backside I take it in my own I entwine our fingers and raise it so it is just above her head pinning it to the bed with my own. I feel her other hand start to make its way down my body I grab it kneeling up I mirror the position of her other hand pinned to the pillow above her head, as I look down at her I see her drag her teeth along her bottom lip, she's about to say something when I lean down and kiss her hard again. While I'm kissing her I move so that one of my legs moves to the other side of her hips, straddling her I feel like I have all the power in this heated exchange and I love it. I grind my lower half upwards painfully slowly and down again in the same motion, I hear her moan into my mouth and it makes me want to continue but my need for air overtakes, I stop kissing her to take a breath resting my forehead against hers.
Arizona: Wow.
Callie: Yeah wow.
We both giggle slightly. She looks at me seriously, then gives me a playful wink. I feel it in my core.
Arizona: I forgot how much I like it when you take control.
I watch as she bites her lip and I don't notice that she has wiggled her hands free. And that they are now cupping my behind.
Arizona: I really like it when you do…
She pushes my bottom so that I grind up her center again.
Arizona: T-this.
Callie: I remember.
I wink at her pushing back down again slower than the first time her hips move up off the mattress to match my movements creating more friction and much more pleasure, I hear her breath hitch in her throat and lean down to kiss her; just before I reach her lips I hear her stomach growl. I sit bolt upright on her and tilt my head back as I laugh extremely hard. When I calm my giggling.
Callie: Hungry.
Arizona: Very… and not just for you.
She husks out. I cant help but laugh at her and she gives me a playful tap on the shoulder as she sits up supporting herself with her hands that are lay flat on the mattress. Her face millimeters from mine my breath gets stuck in my throat again. She takes one hand and firmly places it on the middle of my back, I feel her fingers dig into me slightly and before I know it she has spun us around, I'm flat on my back and she is in-between my thighs… I look into her blue eyes and I see something that I haven't seen in her, or any woman for that matter in some five years, arousal, she wants me, me… its like she is taking all of me in with her eyes, she is scrutinizing my ever feature, my hands move up to cup her cheeks, and I pull her face to mine until her lips are almost grazing mine, but I stop, I pull back and look into her eyes again, this time they are questioning… I pull her face back once more and just as I feel our lips touch… I hear the familiar rumble, that happened only moments before, only this time, it was louder and lasted longer, I try to stifle my laugh, but fail, miserably, I look to her to make sure I haven't upset her, she's holding herself up with one hand on either side of my face and I concentrate on her further. I she the sides of her mouth start to curl up and before I know it I can her white teeth and she falls on me and her head in the crook of my neck laughing hard and loud and I cant help but join in, she rolls off me one hand draping over her eyes as the other lays across her flat stomach. As our laughing fit calms down I find myself turning onto my side to look at her.
Arizona: I'm so hungry.
Callie: Then lets go eat.
I take the pillow from behind my head and throw it her, she giggles like a teenage girl and I hop of the sofa bed and run away as I see her try to hit me with it as I run off.
Callie: I'm going to get dressed.
I shout at her from down the hall. I make my way into my bedroom and close the door behind me, I find myself leaning against it with a massive smile on my face, I let me head drop back, I close my eyes and bite my lip as I bring my hands up to my face entwined. I shake off my smile and my thoughts get just a little darker. I don't deserve this, I don't deserve to be happy, I don't deserve her. I feel like there's just so much… Stuff… I hate stuff. I blow out a loud breath, run my hands through my hair, hoping that it will wash away my negative thoughts. Then push myself off the door. I move over to the closet and pick out some clothes, I have a very cool shower and dress quickly, I throw my hair up into a messy bun as I walk out of my bedroom, as I do I'm met with Arizona, just out of the shower, I taking in her whole body, her bare feet padding on the floor her light blue skinny jeans and then I spot her hands pulling my hoody down over her then I look up, her damp curls framing her face, her blue eyes watching me. Her lips curl into a small smile.
Arizona: Ready?
Callie: More than.
Arizona: Can I borrow some socks?
Callie: Of course you can.
I smile, turning on my heel to answer her request and get what she desires, once back I hand them too her, she disappears back into the room from which she just came and I continue down into the living area, I find that she has already tidied away the sofa bed and the blanket is folded neatly and placed over the arm. I sit and place on my shoes and wait for Arizona to come back, I suddenly feel nervous all over again. I hear her come into the room and I stand placing my hands in the back pockets of my jeans, feeling a little vulnerable. My voice is very quiet when I next speak.
Callie: You ready?
Arizona: More than.
She mimics my words from moments before. She smiles at me and suddenly I feel at ease again. That scares me. The fact that with just one look, one smile one touch, she makes me feel better. It scares me because she can take all of that away, I can't bare the thought that one-day she will just be gone. Decide that the best thing that she ever did was leave. Nothing would hurt me more than that; nothing could hurt me more than that.
Callie: Let's head out then… mind a walk?
Arizona: As long as it's not too far, I might fall over and waste away.
We both chuckle and u just shake my head in response, I make my way over to the door of the room and I pull open the door for her. She walks out and over to the elevator and pushes the call button. The doors open and we ride down in a somewhat awkward silence. I think maybe its because I am just feeling so out of sorts and nervous around her that I feel awkward, I'm making it awkward, I hate that. We leave the elevator and make the short walk to what has become one of my favorite breakfast spots in New York in the short time that I have been here. We come up to the corner and there is a green door with a red neon "burger" sign over the door, I found it after I had been for a walk on one of my first days here, its always quiet which is a shame, because I love this little place, I push the door open and signal for Arizona to walk in before me, she does, she doesn't look very impressed, but none the less she walks in, I say the first words I have said to her since we left my room about 15 minutes ago.
Callie: Do you want to get a table? Ill grab some coffee?
Arizona: Sure.
She walks over to a little booth in the corner, I wait for the chef and owner to notice me, as the place is so quiet she does the cooking and takes the orders, she spots me from the kitchen hatch before the need for me to call her using the provided bell.
Callie: Hey Charlie.
Charlie: 'ey up, Callie. The usual?
Callie: I'm not too late?
Charlie: For you it don't matt-ah what time of the day it is.
Callie: Then yes, times two please.
She busies herself making two coffees and talks over her shoulder.
Charlie: 'Ow are you this mornin' my duck?
Callie: It's refreshing hearing that lovely English accent, I'm alright thanks, how are you?
She laughs at me before she answers me again.
Charlie: It comes ease-eh to meh, I'm good, 'oo's the company?
Callie: It's her…
Charlie: Oh, ya mean thee 'er?
Callie: Yup thee her.
Charlie: Well, good luck, ill bring the food over when it's done.
Callie: Thanks chuck.
Charlie: Anythin' for my best customer.
She gives me a smile and places two cups of coffee in front of me. I return her smile and pick up the cups. I take them over to where Arizona is sat and place one in front of her on the table, while I keep one in my hand and slide into the booth to be sat opposite to her. She takes her cup in both of her hands drawing it close to her lips and blows on the hot brown liquid then she takes a short sip placing the cup back on the table but keeping her hands around it.
Arizona: Mmm, that's a good cup of coffee.
Callie: I know right.
Arizona: How did you find this place? In all my years living here, I don't think I have ever come across it.
Callie: Found it on a walk one night.
Arizona: Oh I see, I've got to say, and please don't take this the wrong way but this doesn't really seem like its your type of place, it's a bit run down and well below your usual price range.
She lets out a nervous laugh.
Callie: I love place like this, hidden gems that don't really get the recognition they deserve, beside it makes me nostalgic.
Arizona: For what?
Callie: If I tell you it will ruin the surprise.
Arizona: Oh okay then, say no more.
She looks down at her cup again and I mirror her actions, when I look up I can see that she is still focused on the cup in front of her turning it in her hands.
Callie: What are you thinking?
Arizona: I don't know.
Callie: How can you not know?
Her eyes snap up and she looks at me like she is considering everything. Her mouth bobs open and closed a few times and she lets out a sigh
Callie: Say it?
Arizona: Say what?
Callie: Whatever it was that just flashed through your mind, that you were going to say and then didn't.
I looked her in the eye starting a staring contest yet again, just as she is about to say something she is cut off.
Charlie: Here you go ladies.
Callie: Thanks Chuck.
I say as she slides the plates in front of us.
Charlie: Enjoy.
She gives us both a smile and turns to go back towards the kitchen area, my eyes stay on Arizona and she looks down at the plate and examines it, sausages, back bacon, toast, tomatoes, beans, eggs, black pudding and hash browns, then she looked up at me.
Arizona: What is this?
Callie: It is a full English breakfast. I'd treat myself to one a week when I was on my travels in England. I know its unhealthy but I couldn't help myself, I've never found a place this side of the pound that does one, well not properly anyway. Then I found this place, Charlie's from a town in England, so she knows how to make a real full English.
Arizona: Well okay then.
We both start to eat and we do so in silence, a few moments later, the host brings over two cups of English breakfast tea. We continue to eat, and its nice, just eating with her, as I come to the end of my meal I put down my knife, only needing my fork, I notice that Arizona has done the same thing, without lifting my head I slice my free hand across the table and run my fingers across hers, she didn't pull away so I move to entwine our fingers, I still don't look up, but I get butterflies, I take the last bite of my meal and finally look up, only to find that the blonde has finished her meal moved her plate to the other side of the table and is palming the side of her cup of tea.
Callie: Did you enjoy your breakfast/lunch/dinner, whatever you call it at this time of day?
Arizona: Well it's an English breakfast so it's kind of in the name. And yes I did, very much thank you. That's something I've missed about you.
Callie: What that I by you breakfast?
We both chuckle. And then she squeezes my hand.
Arizona: No, that you are? Were! always showing me something new.
Callie: I'd like to change it back to 'are'. If that's okay with you?
Arizona: I'd like that.
Callie: I'd like that.
She smiles at me and pulls her hand back taking a sip and smiles at me again.
Arizona: Does that mean were 'girlfriends' ?
Callie: Well… erm… * cough * well I-I'm I Ju-
Arizona: I was kidding Calliope.
Callie: I know but-
Arizona: No buts.
Callie: Well yo-
Arizona: Nope.
Callie: Arizona, come on, I know you say we don't need labels but what are we doing?
Arizona: We are spending time together.
Callie: I know but what are we doing?
Arizona: Spending time together…?
Callie: Come on Arizona.
Arizona: What do you want me to say?
Callie: I don't know. Just not that, call it something.
Arizona: I cant. We are spending time together and that's all it can be.
Callie: So all the kissing, and the, the teasing this morning.
Arizona: I believe you were the one teasing.
Callie: Wait don't, hang on, you started and the kissing, and then, I told you last night.
Arizona: What did you tell me?
Callie: That if you let me kiss you that I wouldn't be able to…
Arizona: Control yourself.
Callie: Yes exactly.
Arizona: Why is that a problem?
Callie: Because I want to know what this is.
Arizona: I feel like we are going around in circles.
Callie: Because you wont answer my question.
Arizona: You didn't have to stop.
Callie: Arizona.
Arizona: I really like it when you do… that.
Callie: ARIZONA ROBBINS.
Arizona: WHAT?
Callie: WHY WON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT WE ARE?
Arizona: YOUR LEAVING IN A WEEK AND A HALF.
Callie: Arizona.
My voice is soft when I speak her name, it rolls of my tongue and I reach out to take one of her hands in-between mine.
Callie: Arizona, I don't have to leave right away.
Arizona: You run a business.
Callie: I own a business.
Arizona: Exactly.
Callie: No. Arizona, listen to me, I might run it right now, but I own a business.
Arizona: What does that even mean? You said different words, but you're saying the same thing.
Callie: I own a business. Which means, I don't have to run it, I can hire someone to do that, I chose to, because I needed something, anything to distract me from you, and I needed to make sure all the designs were what you wanted. I chose to, I don't need to, I can still have control and work here, I can hire someone else.
Arizona: Wait no; you can't do that just for me.
Callie: Why the hell not.
Arizona: Oh calliope it's too much pressure.
Callie: What?
Arizona: Its too much pressure, you have to go.
Callie: Then what are we doing?
Arizona: Spending time together?!
Callie: Until what?
Arizona: Until you leave.
Callie: And then what?
Arizona: Long distance?
Callie: No.
Arizona: That's it just no.
Callie: You know how I feel about long distance.
Arizona: Yeah you're right, I feel the same.
Callie: So what are we doing?
Arizona: Spending time together.
Callie: What and then in a week and a half that's it?
Arizona: I guess.
Callie: You can't be serious?
Arizona: I don't know.
Callie: What are we doing Arizona? What are we doing?
She pauses for a moment, takes her hand from mine and places it, along with her other hand in her lap. She looks down at them and without making a move her next words are barely heard.
Arizona: I-I don't know Callie.