She come up to me
I can't remember what she said
Cause I was in a trance and I forgot it all.
Banging on about all that
Revolution in her head
She'd make a lover seem so magical
December 24, 2011
Jo hurries into the Situation Room and immediately freezes when she sees President Meyers face on Oracle's screens. "I understand Madam President, but I've sent as many people as I feel comfortable sending." Chloe is sitting in front of the monitors and she looks exhausted. Castiel is standing stoically behind her, his sole job to look menacing.
"I'm not writing New York off as a lost cause," President Meyers argues.
"I'm not saying that. Look, it's the largest Croat stronghold we've found so far. There's got to be a reason why they chose that place and I don't feel comfortable going forward without knowing that reason." Chloe pinches the bridge of her nose. "I'm suggesting we retreat, for the time being, regroup and formulate a plan when we have better, more complete intelligence."
"And how do you propose we get that intelligence?" The President asks.
"The same way we got intelligence before all this happened," Chloe offers but the President doesn't seem to understand. "You can't tell me we lost all the spooks when Croatoan hit. Come on, someone found us for you, you guys sure as hell didn't do that on your own. Who was it, CIA, FBI, NSA?"
"You want me to send my people into a Croat stronghold?" The President balks.
"You have no problem letting me send my people in there," Chloe counters. "It's a simple fact finding mission, it's what these guys do best. How this is any different than sending them into Afghanistan, Iran, or Russia?"
"We haven't had spies in Russia since the end of the cold war," The President responds automatically.
Chloe pauses in surprise. "Seriously," she chuckles, "you're actually bothering to feed me the company line? Now? After everything?"
The President is quiet for a second, then even she lets out a laugh. "Admiral Richardson has a few contacts he may be able to rely on."
Jo takes this opportunity to crouch down next to Chloe and whisper in her ear, "They're at the front gate getting checked."
"Madam President, I'm sorry there's something I need to take care of. You can coordinate with Archer to iron out the details," Chloe says a bit excitedly.
"Of course." The President nods. "Oh and Chloe, Merry Christmas."
Chloe pauses and looks at the President confused. "I'm sorry, what?"
President Meyers laughs again. "It's Christmas Eve. Merry Christmas."
"Yes, of course," Chloe mumbles. "To you too." She closes the video connection and turns to Dean. "I guess that would explain the tree in the Mess. Did you know it was Christmas?" She can't remember the last time she actually celebrated Christmas.
"They're leaving the gate," Jo interrupts her thoughts.
"Right." Chloe grabs her coat and heads for the door. "Do Lois and Lucy know?"
"That it's Christmas?" Jo asks confused. "I would think so, Lois is the one who made Clark chop down the Christmas tree."
Chloe chuckles, that sounds exactly like Lois. "No, about-"
"Is it true?" Lucy tumbles into the Situation Room, Lois hot on her heels. "Is he here?"
"Why didn't you tell us?" Lois pants out, it's obvious that they ran to Chloe's cabin from where ever they'd been when they heard the news.
"I wanted it to be a surprise." Chloe sighs, she makes a motion for them to head outside and they do, Chloe following closely behind them, Dean, Malachi, and Castiel behind her.
"You wanted what to be a surprise? What's going on?" Dean asks walking up to Chloe's shoulder.
"The General called a few weeks ago, said he and his men were docking in New York, said he was on his way to Camp that he had something very important to talk to me about and that he didn't feel like he could explain over the phone," Chloe says, making her way to the Archery Range.
"How did you manage to keep this from Lois and Lucy?" Dean smiles at her at as two Hummers and an honest to God tank make their way down the entry road and into the camp quad. Lois and Lucy are clutching at each other, hoping from foot to foot in eager anticipation.
"It wasn't easy." Chloe shrugs. "But I rarely get to deliver good news, and on Christmas no less." She smiles, her cousins excitement obviously contagious. The vehicles stop and uniformed soldiers pile out and fall into line in front of Chloe, standing at attention. Lois and Lucy are less energetic now as they search the faces of the men and do not see their dad. Chloe groans when she sees the reason why. Captain Grant, the General's second-in-command, climbs out of the Hummer holding a neatly folded American flag. "Shit, it looks they'll be no good news today."
"You don't think?" Dean stands up straighter as Captain Grant heads for Lois and Lucy who have obviously caught onto what's happening.
"I really do." Chloe shakes her head and walks over to her cousins.
She grabs Lois' arm just as Grant offers her the flag with a frown on his face and a solemn, "I've very sorry for your loss." Lois reaches out stiffly and grabs the flag, clutching it in her fingers in a white knuckled grip, nodding absently at Grant. Lucy is a little slow on the uptake though, not fully understanding what's going on.
"Lois, where's Dad?" Lucy whispers looking from her sister's face to the flag and back again. "Where's Dad?" Lucy's voice starts to wobble and tears well up in her eyes.
"Luce…" Lois swallows, clenching the flag to her chest.
"No." Lucy drops her sister's arm and backs away. "No." She looks desperately to Chloe. "Where's my Dad?"
"Lucy." Chloe steps toward her but she turns and runs away. Chloe makes a move to go after her but Lois stops her with a hand on Chloe's forearm.
"I've got her." Lois walks off after her sister.
"Clark is in South America somewhere, find him, tell him what's going on, and get him back here now." Chloe tells Jo who nods and walks back to the Situation Room. "Captain Grant." Chloe steps forward.
"Ma'am," he says, standing at attention and offering her a salute.
"You don't have to do that," Chloe admonishes him.
"You're my boss, I kind of do." He smirks at her but it's tired, dejected.
"At ease then," Chloe orders him and the rest of the soldiers.
"I have a few other things for them." Captain Grant reaches in his pocket and pulls something out. Chloe recognizes Lois' Mom's engagement ring and their wedding bands dangling from the General's dog tags. "Things the General wanted them to have."
"I can pass them on," Chloe assures him, as he hands them over. She clenches them in her hand for a second before dropping them in her pocket.
"I've got a present for you too." Grant smiles and turns back to the Hummer. He whistles and nods at one of the soldiers who opens the vehicle's back door. "Joshua, get over here."
"You're a day earlier, Christmas isn't until tomorrow," Chloe says, going for levity.
She's not sure exactly what's going on when a young man, Joshua apparently, steps cautiously out of the Hummer and looks around at his surroundings. "Well?" Grant looks to her for something, some sort of recognition.
"He's not exactly my type but…thank you?" Chloe frowns at Grant. "For thinking of me."
"Joshua, this is Chloe, Chloe, Joshua," Grant introduces them, staring between them expectantly.
"Hi." Joshua waves at her sheepishly, still slightly unsure where he is and why he's there.
"Hi." Chloe waves back then turns to Grant who has apparently done his job and is not offering her anything else to go on. She turns away from the young man, not really sure what to do with him at the moment and looks at the rest of the General's men. "When was the last time you guys had a home cooked meal?" She asks the soldiers.
"Five years, seven months, two days," one of them answers, only partly joking.
"Dean, can you show these guys to the Mess Hall, Ellen and Martha should have dinner ready by now."
"Yeah, sure." Dean motions for the soldiers to follow him, one of them grabs Joshua's sleeve and pulls him along. Chloe takes Captain Grant's arm and steers him toward the Mess.
Most of her communication with the General happened through Grant, they'd gotten to know each other really well over the past six or seven months. "What the hell happened Owen?" Chloe asks him when they reach the steps. "The General wouldn't tell me anything. What are you guys even doing here? Who's the civie?"
"So you have no idea who he is?" Grant groans in frustration. "Great, we trekked all over Europe trying to find him, risked everything, the General gave his life to get him to you and you have no idea who he is?" He turns around and kicks the railing on the steps in frustration, knocking it completely off and to the ground. Malachi plants himself in between Grant and Chloe, a low growl building deep in his throat.
"It's OK boy. He's just upset." Chloe grabs Malachi and pulls him back. "Grant." Chloe reaches out and grabs his arm, stopping him as he moves forward, this time to punch the wooden post supporting the porch and likely break his hand in the process. "Calm down."
He takes a few deep breaths, rests his head against the wooden post until he calms down enough to take a step back. He looks sheepishly at the pieces of wood that used to be a railing and then over at Chloe. Malachi bares his fangs one last time for good measure and Grant steps back slightly. "Sorry about that," he offers.
"It's cool." Chloe gives him a small smile. "I never liked it that much." Grant lets out a sheepish laugh. "Plus, watch this." Chloe smirks and leans over the porch. "Hey, you," she calls out, stopping a passing guy, a red head. "Chris, right?"
"Yes ma'am," he stutters, freezing in place.
"Fix this." Chloe motions to the pieces of wood.
"Yes ma'am." He nods then scurries away. Chloe presumes to go get some tools of some sort.
Grant just shakes his head at her. "Perks of the job." Chloe shrugs, unapologetic and walks him inside. They both fix a plate, meatloaf with all the trimmings, then take a table off in the back of the room, out of the way.
"Where'd you get actual meat?" Grant asks, hesitantly poking at his slice of meatloaf.
"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," Chloe says with a smiling thinking about when she asked Ellen the exact same question. They'd basically hunted out the wood's around them by now and no one was stupid enough to touch anything left in store freezers or restaurants. Jo had then nervously relayed the story of how she'd gone off a hunch and sent a group of Kandorian's to Africa, thinking that there would be plenty of game left and she'd been right. They were very careful to only take a little and they always shared with the other few refugee camps around the country. "It's not exactly beef but it's good, trust me."
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Sam and Oliver have been trying to bring Joshua up to speed but the whole thing seems slightly surreal to him. This place is nothing like the refugee camp in Wales, nothing like the countless military camps they'd stopped at along the way. Every place he'd been to since leaving Cardiff had been the same, people milling about aimlessly, most of them in some state of perpetual shock, no one knowing what to do, all of them just waiting for it to be over one way or another.
But here it was different, there was movement, constant movement. People were doing things, everyone was busy, all the time. When he'd mentioned feeling useless back in Cardiff they'd assured him that wouldn't be a problem here. Everyone had a job to do, sometimes two or three jobs to do and if you didn't have one, they'd find one for you. He wasn't exactly sure how that was even possible what with the sheer amount of people there were. It was the most people Joshua had seen gathered together in one place since the virus hit, and the soldiers, he couldn't believe how many soldiers there were.
He'd not seen a single member of Her Majesties Army the entire time he'd been in England, he wasn't even sure there was such a thing as Her Majesties Army anymore, but here he couldn't go two feet without hitting someone in camo gear. When he mentions this to Oliver, he smiles.
"We had a bit of head start here, seeing it happen to you guys first. We were slightly better prepared, had a lower casualty rate. As for why they're here, we're sort of the unofficial base camp for all military organizations."
"Here?" Joshua looks around. "Why not Washington? Did something happen to Washington? We didn't really get any news in England but I'd assumed the President—oh God did something happen to the President?" His eyes get wide, he hadn't thought, didn't really have time to think about the political ramifications of everything. For all he knew there was no more President and if there was no President there likely wasn't a Prime Minister, he hated to think what had become of the Queen.
"The President didn't make it," Sam explains, "but we have a new President now and she's pretty good actually."
"Right." Joshua nods glossing over the she. Of course they had a new President, they had contingencies set up for this sort of thing in America.
"From what Chloe can figure out your Prime Minister didn't make it but the Queen's doing fine, she was evacuated to Balmoral at the first sign of trouble and they haven't had much problems with Croats that far North," Sam offers as if he can somehow read Joshua's mind and he lets out a breath he didn't realize he was even holding. Apparently it takes the end of the world to really come to appreciate one's Monarch.
"And what about her?" Joshua looks over his shoulder to the short blonde that Grant had introduced him too earlier. "Who is she exactly?"
Oliver and Sam exchange glances. "She's the boss here at camp," Sam says finally after weighing his words very carefully.
"She's the boss everywhere." Oliver snorts. "She's in charge of all of us and the military too."
"Her?" Joshua can't keep the disbelief out of his voice as he looks over at her again. "She's so…young."
"Well she didn't exactly ask for the job." Sam shook his head. "She just sort of fell into the role."
"None of us asked for this," Joshua points out studying Chloe more intently. She reminds him of Gwen, taking on the responsibility of helping a bunch of people that she doesn't even know, simply because it has to be done. She looks young, that's true, but at the same time she looks extremely old, older than her years by far and tired, she looks so tired that Joshua wants to go have a nap on her behalf, but none of that changes that she's the reason he's there in the first place. "Why was General Lane so keen to get me to her?"
"I don't know why the General thought it was so important to have you here but if anyone can figure it out, it'll be Chloe. I know whatever it is, it was important so that means that you're important."
"But I'm nobody," Joshua protests vehemently.
"Not to the General and not to Chloe," Sam argues with him.
"Look, I know she looks young but she's good," Oliver says and Joshua turns to him to find him staring at Chloe just as intently as he had been. "She keeps us all feed and safe when she can help it." He smiles slightly. "She can be a bit abrasive but don't let that scare you off. She'd give her life for anyone at this camp, including you, has given her life for some of us more than once," Oliver says cryptically. "She knows what needs to be done and she does it, even when she doesn't like it, so you don't have to worry OK?"
"I'm not worried," Joshua tells him honestly and for the first time in a long time he isn't worried, he feels safe here and he has no idea why. He looks back over at Chloe who is deep in conversation with Grant and frowns. There's something about her, about just being in the same vicinity as her that puts him instantly at ease. Maybe she just has that effect on people, maybe she just has that kind of effect on him. The longer he looks at her though, he can't shake the feeling that he's met her before.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
"The General didn't make it out of New York." Grant tells Chloe flat out, after dancing around the subject for long enough. "They were waiting for us at the docks, like they knew we were going to be there. He sacrificed himself so that we could get Joshua here to you." Malachi, obviously having changed his opinion on Grant, lifts his head slightly and lays it across the man's knee, hoping to offer him some sort of comfort and Grant smiles, running his fingers through the dogs fur.
Chloe pushes the peas around on her plate and looks over to where Joshua is talking with Sam and Oliver then back to Grant. "So is there something special about him?"
Grant looks over at Joshua and shrugs. "He held his own at the docks, but then he had a kind of minor breakdown." Grant turns back to Chloe. "Not than I can blame him. He's just a civilian, it's not like he was trained for this. Hell, it's not like any of us were trained for this." Grant looks over her shoulder at Dean, who's laughing with a few of his men. "Well, except maybe the two of you."
"Us? Are you kidding?" Chloe pushes her plate away and offers him a rare smile. "He used to sell insurance, and I'm a classically trained ballet dancer." Grant seems taken aback for a second before Chloe laughs letting him off the hook, then turning her attention back on Joshua. "Why him? Why was it so important that he come here then?"
"The General wouldn't say. One night he told me that he didn't really understand it himself," Grant explains. "He said he had a dream, about a week after Croatoan hit Europe, he saw a face, his face." Grant nods over at Joshua. "He made these sketches. We had to check every guy at every camp we came across. The General was convinced that we'd find him, in everything that was going on it had to be a one in a million chance. We wanted to give up but the General wouldn't let us. Said he didn't know why, probably never would, but he knew this Joshua kid was important. We ended up in Cardiff, heard there was a camp there, that they had a boat that was going to America. We get there and there's no boat, but we find the kid. One in a million." Grant shakes his head. "He just kept saying everything would be alright if we got Joshua to America, to you." Grant shrugs and stands up.
"He had a dream?" Chloe asks perking up slightly at this.
"Yeah, does that mean anything to you?" Grant asks.
"Not to me." Chloe shakes her head.
"Joshua," Grant calls across the room. Joshua scrambles to his feet and hurries over, sliding his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. "I made a promise that I wouldn't let him out of my sight until we got him to you. So I now officially pass him over into your care."
Joshua looks between Grant and Chloe. "You're passing me off?" Joshua asks. "Are you going somewhere?"
"Where ever our fearless leader sends us next." Grant claps Joshua on the back. "Don't worry, we're leaving you in good hands. She's the reason you're here anyway, the woman with all the answers."
Joshua looks at Chloe expectantly. "Right, answers. We'll get to that, I promise." She turns back to Grant. "You should talk to Jo. She'll set you and your men up with some rooms. You guys should take a few days, rest up before you go back out there."
"Thanks." Grant nods at her. "Feel free to put my guys to work as long as we're here, don't want them to get lazy."
"I'm sure that won't be a problem." Chloe turns to Joshua and looks him up and down, quietly appraising him. "You, come with me," Chloe says and he scrambles to follow her out of the Mess Hall.
A woman appears at Chloe's side the instant they step out of the building almost as if by magic, matching her step to Chloe's without hesitation, like they do this all the time. Joshua hurries to keep up, not that they'd even notice if he wasn't there but is sure to keep his distance, cautiously eyeing the large white dog that seems to follow Chloe everywhere. "Oliver's report from Memphis mentioned a refugee camp, it's pretty stable, Croat activity minimal but he says they're not doing too good on the supplies front and I was thinking…"
"Get in touch with Eva, she swore to me that they would have the Red Cross up and running by now, give her the information and they can take care of it," Chloe says. Jo opens her mouth to protest and Chloe cuts her off, but not unkindly, "Jo, it's not our job, we've got way more important things to think about and that's what the Red Cross is there for."
"Yes ma'am." Jo scribbles something on the pad. "Lt. Colonel Archer said something earlier about pulling everyone out of New York and I heard you on the phone with the President, but I need you to officially give me the order."
"Everyone," Chloe nods giving the order, "and that means Knowles and his men."
"He's not going to be happy about that." Jo bites her lip.
"He's not happy about much." Chloe snorts. "Speaking of Archer, I want him working point on the New York thing. The spooks are going to want to keep us out of the loop, it's in their nature. I need him to make sure that doesn't happen."
Jo lets out dramatized sigh. "He's going to name it you know," she tells Chloe with a funny smile. "He's going to give it some lame name like Operation Big Apple or something."
"He can't help it," Chloe defends the man. "Anything else?"
"Vegas," Jo says in a long suffering tone and Chloe stops in her tracks. Joshua isn't ready for that and almost barrels right into her. "It's a cluster fuck."
"It's always been a cluster fuck." Chloe sighs in annoyance.
"The hunters won't take orders from the military, the military refuses to listen to the hunters and nothing's getting done. It's almost got a casualty rate higher than New York. You need to go down there and put the fear of G—" Jo's mouth closes comically cutting off what she was about to say. "Put some fear into them."
"When? When should I go down there, please tell me in all my massive amounts of free time, when I can go sort out Las Vegas?" Chloe asks rubbing her temples. "Send Knowles." Chloe brightens a bit. "If anyone can straighten that place out he can, and he'll be happy, it's the biggest hot zone in the South West. It'll give him a chance to make up for Arizona and tell him I'll be out there as soon as I can find a free minute."
"Anything else?" Jo asks.
"I'm taking Joshua to Emil but let everyone know I want them in my cabin in three hours OK?" She doesn't elaborate on who everyone is so Jo must know, Joshua assumes she doesn't literally mean everyone. "And find Captain Grant, set him and his men up with a few cabins, assign them some chores and talk to him, see if he has any preferences for his next assignment." Chloe pauses. "You know what wait; send them to Vegas with Knowles." Jo nods and heads in the opposite direction and Chloe resumes walking to where ever it is she's taking Joshua.
"So you're in charge here? Everyone just does what you say?" Joshua struggles to keep pace with her.
"Pretty much." Chloe spares him a glance over her shoulder.
"Like whatever you say?" He catches up to her and looks at her sideways.
"Yes." Chloe nods.
"So if you say jump they ask how high?"
"No." Chloe stops and turns to him. "If I say jump. They jump."
"And if you order them into a hot zone they go?" Joshua asks.
"Yes." Chloe grits her teeth.
"Do I have to do what you say?" Joshua asks as they reach Emil's lab. Chloe stops and turns to him.
"Joshua, do you want to live?" Chloe puts her hand on the door and he nods. "Then if I say jump, you jump. If I say run, you run. If I say stay, you stay. If I say fight, you fight, you understand?" He nods and she walks into the building. He stands there for a second to get his breathing under control and she opens the door and peers out at him. "Joshua, inside, now."
"Yes ma'am." He scrambles to follow her through the door, Malachi on his heels but Chloe holds out a hand and the dog pauses, his ear's droop down and he sits on the porch.
"Don't give me that look, you know how Emil feels about having you in here," Chloe says shutting the door on the dog before turning around. "Doc!" Chloe calls out, walking through the main room. She veers around the cots on the right side which are thankfully, strangely empty and heads to the doors in the back, doors that are being guarded by two very scary looking guys. She stops in her tracks and spins to face Joshua. "Stay here. Don't move." She stares at him for a minute then spins back around and has a silent conversation with the two men before heading through the doors.
Joshua takes the opportunity to look around the room. Since the soldiers took him out of Cardiff he's visited his fair share of sick bays. All of them had been hastily thrown together, minimally stocked and woefully understaffed. This place on the other hand looks more like a high tech medical lab, the types of places where they cure cancer. There are two stainless steel tables, Joshua counts five machines he's only vaguely heard of in passing in school and considering only about three hospitals in the country could actually afford them, he never imagined he'd see any in person.
He walks over to a centrifuge that has been left open on the counter, a machine he's actually had some experience dealing with. He idly spins the center disc , stopping it when he realizes one of the guards is glaring at him. He grins sheepishly then looks around only to stop and walk to the back of the room, all the while staring at the 12-foot tall machine in front of him in wonder. He reaches out his hand slowly but jerks it back when he hears a harsh, "Don't touch that." Joshua spins around, slightly guilty and sees Chloe elbow an older man in the ribs.
"Emil," Chloe says through clenched teeth.
"Please," Emil adds with a tired smile.
"You have your own electron microscope?" Joshua turns back to the machine. "Why do you have your own electron microscope?"
"We use it as a coat rack." Chloe grabs his elbow gently and pulls him away from the microscope back to the exam area.
"Where did you get that? I thought the Berkley lab was the only place with one that big. It was special made for them by the Department of Energy," Joshua says dumbly. Chloe and Emil stop and share a look. Joshua's eyes go wide and he turns back to the microscope. "That's…"
"We needed one and they weren't using it," Chloe cuts him off and motions for him to step up onto the exam table. "Emil is going to give you a quick once over, take some blood, check your vitals."
"Why?" Joshua asks as Emil walks over and pulls up his sleeve.
"Because I told him to," Chloe says simply, dropping down into the nearest chair.
"Right." Joshua nods, turning away quickly as Emil readies the syringe.
Two hours later Joshua is downing a glass of water, trying to catch his breath. "You stink," Chloe says spinning the chair.
"I just ran two miles." Joshua pants. "Was the stress test really necessary?"
"Probably not." Chloe smiles and stands up. She walks over to the counter and runs her fingers along the edge, one hand reaching out for a pile of microscope slides.
"Don't touch that," Emil says without turning around and Chloe snatches her hand back quickly. Joshua allows himself a small smile, it's nice to know he's not the only one who gets chastised.
"Chloe, come take a look at this," Emil calls from in front of the stolen electron microscope. He steps back and pulls off his glasses, rubbing the bridge of his nose. He needs Chloe to double check his findings to make sure he isn't seeing things.
Chloe walks over and checks the image for herself. "Are those antibodies?" She looks back up at Emil who nods.
"Antibodies?" Joshua frowns.
Chloe turns to him with a strange look on her face. "For Croatoan."
"But the only way that I could possibly have—" Joshua swallows hard. "I'm infected?" he asks, his voice desperate.
"No, you were infected," Chloe corrects him. "And then you were cured."
Joshua wracks his brain, he can't remember any time where he could have gotten infected, even when dealing with possibly infected wounded he was always very careful. He certainly doesn't remember receiving anything remotely like a cure. The last time he checked there was no cure so how in the hell does he have antibodies floating around in his blood stream?
"I've only seen this once before." Emil points out to Chloe. "In your blood."
Joshua turns to the blond woman and she doesn't seem the least bit surprised by that pronouncement. "How viable are they?" Chloe asks interested. "Mine never lasted long enough to be useful."
"Useful?" Joshua asks not following.
"For finding an vaccine," Chloe tells him.
"You can do that?" Joshua rolls down his sleeves, a hopeful expression on his face.
"I won't know until I do more research." Emil puts his glasses back on. "I'll probably need a few things."
"You always need a few things." Chloe smiles fondly at the doctor. "Get me a list and I'll send someone out." Her hand reaches for the thin chain hidden under the collar of her shirt. She pulls at it until a small crystal pendant falls out. Grabbing it, she absently begins to move the pendant back and forth on the chain, a practiced habitual motion that she probably doesn't even know she's doing. Joshua can't seem to take his eyes off the pendant though.
"It was you." He says slowly, jumping off of the examination table and walking toward Chloe.
Before either of them even realize what's happening, he reaches out his hand and grabs the pendant, pulling it from Chloe's fingers. "You looked kind of familiar but," Joshua looks up at Chloe, "your hair is much longer," he says. "I didn't recognize you at first." Chloe raises her eyebrows at him then looks down where he is still holding onto her pendant. Joshua drops it quickly and takes a step back out of her personal space. "That was my mother's," Joshua says to her. "I gave it to you, remember?"
Chloe looks down at the pendant, it's been hanging from her neck for so long she actually had forgotten where it came from. "We've met before?" Chloe asks him.
"Just the once, the day you created me." Joshua smiles.
July 5, 2008 Chloe turns the corner, resisting the urge to look over her shoulder. Surprisingly she feels better, not good yet. Good probably won't come for a while but talking about it to someone, a stranger, actually did help. Steven Temple, she commits his name to memory, maybe she'll do a bit of research, have Emil look at his wife's file, see if there's anything they can do. She knows it's not really their area but the woman has a one month old and Chloe's pretty sure at this point Oliver wouldn't refuse her anything. He'd probably be excited by the fact that she's actually talking again. Her steps become more determined as she makes her way back to the Watchtower. Her fingers are itching for a keyboard and she stops in the middle of the street when she realizes just how long it's been since she touched a computer. When she gets to the Watchtower she takes the steps two at a time, lamenting the fact that Oliver hasn't had a chance to replace the dilapidated elevator. She knows that she's the reason for this, knows that all of the renovation plans have been put on hold because Oliver's afraid to change anything, doesn't want to upset Chloe any more than she already is. By the time she gets to the tenth floor, not even halfway to her apartment she realizes that she might actually be ready for the change, might in fact be craving the change. It has nothing to do with the fact that she's just run up ten flights of stairs and is sweaty and tired, it's not about the fact that her legs feel like they're going to fall off and there's a stitch in her side that's making it hard to breathe. It's the fact that she cared enough about something to run up the steps. It's about the fact that for the first time in a long time she actually wants to breathe. Oliver freezes when the door to the Watchtower opens and Chloe walks in. "Chloe!" he calls out, turning in a panic to the other guys standing behind him, loading supplies in bags. "Aren't you supposed to be in the park? You're usually in the park this time of day right?" "I never made it to the park." Chloe brushes past him and sits down at her computer turning it on for the first time in months. "We've got to get that elevator fixed. I also want to talk to you about—" She stops, and turns around slowly staring at Oliver and the guys. "What's going on?" she asks them. "Nothing," Oliver answers her reflexively, then flinches because it's obvious something is going on. "Nothing?" Chloe asks. "You're just hanging around the Watchtower in the middle of the day, wearing your suits." She nods to the leather. "Loading weapons into bags." "OK, so something's going on." Oliver walks over to her as the boys continue to load up their gear. "We found a possible 33.1 in Europe, Southern France more accurately. Thought we'd go check it out, see what's going on." Chloe stares at him for a second, she's made a point to distance herself from League stuff since Jimmy's death. She knew that the life she lead, the job she had helping Oliver, had in part, contributed to Jimmy's death. Even after she reconciled herself to that fact, she still shied away from her duties as Watchtower because she no longer trusted her own judgment. "Can I come with you?" Oliver freezes again, staring at Chloe with surprise. He looks over at the guys then back at Chloe with a sort of fond smile on his face. "Yeah, of course." "Great, just let me get my gear." Chloe turns around to her desk, grabs a stack of post-it notes and scribbles a very hasty note to herself- "That's a good idea, I'll call him on the way, tell him to meet us at the airport." Oliver nods. "Good." Chloe grabs the post-it and shoves it in her pocket. "I've got something I want to talk to him about." :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Playing Watchtower is just like riding a bike; you never really forget how to do it. They bring her up to speed on the flight and she walks them through security with ease. Oliver's suspicions are confirmed when they find a basement full of prisoners who have obviously been experimented on. They all look a little worse for wear. They're not even Metas apparently, just ordinary people. They'd been taken randomly so that Tess could test the effects of the meteors on them. Oliver and the guys free them and bring them to the S.T.A.R Labs facility in Paris, so Emil can check them out. Dinah makes them all tea and Victor wraps them in blankets and Bart offers to go get them their favorite foods from anywhere in the world, and that's when she remembers why they do what they do. One by one Emil gives them all a clean bill of health and Oliver guides them into the room where Chloe has set up her equipment so that she can give them a new name, a new home, a new life. In the span of three hours she completely creates fifteen unique, fool-proof identities from scratch. As she leads Emily Hayes, formerly Dana Parsons, out of the room explaining to her that AC will show her to her new apartment and hands her a card. "My personal number is on there, call me if you need anything, we can be there in seconds." She looks over her shoulder to Bart who winks. "Or if you just need to talk. I've been where you were, I know." "Thanks." Emily grabs the card and clutches it in her fingers, giving Chloe an impromptu hug that Chloe surprises herself by returning. AC steps forward and takes Emily's arm, leading her out of the room. "I guess it's my turn then?" someone asks and Chloe turns around confused to see a young man, probably around her age, standing up. He looks around shyly, sliding his hands in his pockets and hunches his shoulders up around his ears. "I thought…" Chloe looks back at the door that AC and Emily just exited through. She was sure Emily had been the last one. She looks back at the guy and smiles. "Yeah, guess it's your turn." She motions for him to follow her into her 'office'. "So you need a new life." Chloe turns her computer back on and looks across the desk. "It appears that way, yes." The man nods. "We could start with a name." Chloe says as she opens up all the programs she needs. "Anything in particular you'd like to be called." "I've been giving this a lot of thought actually." He smiles and Chloe nods in encouragement. "Joshua, I've always liked that name." Chloe smiles and starts typing. "Preference on last name?" He shakes his head. "OK, how about Moore?" "Sounds great." He smiles at her. "So, Joshua Moore," Chloe says and stops typing and looks across the table at Joshua, "who do you want to be?" "I don't know." Joshua smiles and shrugs his shoulders. "When I was at school, I was studying Medicine. I liked it. The idea of helping people, healing people, it's nice." "It is." Chloe nods. "I can do that." She starts typing again. "It would probably be best if you didn't go back home. From your accent I'm guessing Devon." "Accent?" Joshua asks confused then pauses a second. "Oh right, my accent. Devon. Good guess." Joshua nods. "A big city would be best, easy to hide in. How do you feel about London?" "Always liked it." He smiles at her. "London it is then." Chloe types some more. "Kings College alright with you? They have a great medical program." "Sounds great." Joshua shrugs. He sits there for a few minutes studying his surroundings while Chloe types away furiously on her laptop. "And done." Chloe smiles. "Now we'll have to work out some housing." "Wait, just like that I'm in school?" Joshua leans forward. "That was much easier than last time." "It was a little tricky." Chloe nods. "A few faked transcripts, an MCAT score good enough to get you in but not so good that people are expecting you to be a genius. Then I had to back date your application, forge an interview evaluation from your new faculty advisor." "Oh sure." Joshua laughed. "Just a little tricky." "Well, there is the matter of your tuition and housing." Chloe bites her lip. "That might be bit more difficult." "Oh, right, tuition. Money." Joshua frowns. "I suppose I could just get a job." "Work a part time job and go to med school?" Chloe shakes her head. "You'll kill yourself within a year. Besides you wouldn't even make enough money to keep you fed." "Student loans?" Joshua leans forward. "Not likely." Chloe shakes her head. "Your new life looks great on paper so long as you don't dig any deeper. It's going to take me a month at least to get it to the point where it will stand up to the kind of scrutiny needed for a student loan application and you don't have that kind of time, the semester starts next week. Even if I had the time, I'd rather not put your new identity out there so soon, have it come under so much scrutiny." "So then…no school?" Joshua asks. "I don't give up that easily." Chloe shakes her head and types some more. "It looks like you have suddenly received a great windfall. Mrs. Margaret O'Hare has died and left a trust in your name, the money to be used toward your schooling." "Really?" Joshua smiles. "And who is Margaret O'Hare?" "I don't know, I just made her up." Chloe chuckles then stops. "O'Hare was my grandmother's maiden name."
"It's very pretty," Joshua offers and Chloe goes back to her typing.
"I suppose she could be your Aunt—no Great Aunt, you were very close." Chloe informs him.
"I remember her fondly, spending Summers at her country estate." Joshua plays along and Chloe smiles at him. "But where exactly did Great Aunt Margaret get the money to pay for my tuition?" "Oliver of course." Chloe brushes him off, as if the question is ridiculous. "No, I couldn't possibly ask you too—it's not your place, you shouldn't—" Joshua protests. "We want to," Chloe assures him. "And he can more than spare it, don't worry. I'll add in an allowance for housing and incidentals and it still won't even come close to what he spent on his last car. The school won't let me pay it all in advance and if I just gave you all the money it would look very suspicious so I'll have to pay it term by term. Just send me an e-mail, I'll take care of it." Chloe takes out another card and passes it across the desk. "And my numbers are on there, if you ever need anything." "Thanks." Joshua offers her a genuine smile then. "Now, this is going to be the hard part." Chloe sighs. "You'll have to leave your old life behind. Completely. You can't go back home, you can't take anything with you that they might be able to use to track you. Did they leave anything on you? Cell phone? Keys?" Joshua slides the card into his pocket and pulls out a set of keys. "They can track me with these?" Joshua holds the key's up to the light, a small crystal dangling of it the only adornment. "No." Chloe shakes her head. "But I find if people don't keep the keys, they're less likely to try and go back home, have a last look around for old times' sake, maybe take a souvenir. It's easier to let go of your old life if you don't have anything to hold on to," Chloe says, talking to herself as much as she's talking to Joshua, thinking about the Watchtower, about how everything in it reminds her of Jimmy and now more than ever she wants to talk to Oliver about starting the renovations. "It's just…" Joshua grabs the crystal and stares at it, spinning it around in his fingers. "This was my mothers. It used to hang in the kitchen window. I remember sitting at the table, watching her bake and it would sparkle in the sunlight and make rainbows on the wallpaper. When she died they said I could have anything I wanted of hers. I just wanted this." He looks up at Chloe. "I'm not sure I'm ready to part with it forever, but I don't know if I'm strong enough to keep it, knowing what it stands for." Chloe stares at the crystal, watching the way it absorbs the light. "What if it wasn't forever?" Chloe looks at him, holding out her hand palm up. Joshua drops the keys reflexively and she swears for a second it's almost like the crystal glows. The effect is brief enough that Chloe can write it off as a trick of the light. She grabs the crystal and it's surprisingly warm to the touch. She works it off the key ring and drops the keys in her bag, holding the crystal in her palm. "What if hold onto it for you and when you're ready for it, I'll give it back to you?" "I'd like that." ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Two days later Chloe stumbles into the Watchtower exhausted from thirty flights of stairs on top two transcontinental flights and the fact that she really hasn't slept much in the past few months. Still somehow she feels a lot better than she has in a while. She walks up one more flight to her bedroom, slides off her shoes and empties out her pockets, dropping loose change and her keys on the top of her dresser. She pauses when she sees Joshua's crystal and picks it up, turning it over in her fingers. A small smile tugs at the corner of her lips when the first rays of the sun peek through the window and hit the crystal, fracturing the light into tiny rainbows. Chloe gasps at the effect, it reminds her of the way the sun shines through the stained glass downstairs. She looks over at the picture of her and Jimmy on the nightstand and her hand goes to her chest, reaching instinctively for his rosary. She remembers too late that she's not wearing it anymore, that it doesn't belong to her anymore and her heart twists a bit. She looks back to the crystal then walks over to her jewelry box. She digs around until she finds what she's looking for and comes away with a long silver chain. She threads the chain through the small metal loop fixed into the top of the crystal and fastens it around her neck, slipping the makeshift necklace under her shirt and she relaxes, just slightly.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
"Did you…" Chloe grasps the crystal in her hands and looks over at Joshua. "Did you want it back?" she asks, dreading his answer. The thought of Joshua taking the pendant back puts such a knot in the pit of her stomach that she's afraid for a second she'll be sick. Though it has no direct connection, she's come to associate the crystal with the Watchtower. Not necessarily with Jimmy, but with change, with moving on and she's not ready to give that up.
"No." Joshua shakes his head. "I don't think…I'm not ready yet." He looks up at her. "Could you keep it for me, just a little while longer?"
"Sure." Chloe tucks the crystal under her shirt and calls out to Emil as she pushes Joshua toward the door. "We're gonna head to my cabin so I can bring everyone up to speed. Send someone as soon as you find anything OK?"
"Chloe." Emil stops her. "Can I talk to you?"
"Just wait outside," Chloe tells Joshua who nods.
"He has never been in a 33.1," Emil says when the door closes and this makes Chloe pause.
"Are you sure?" Chloe frowns. "How can you even know?"
"First of all, I don't remember him. I don't remember examining him, and I remember them all," he says. "But more specifically I remember that day, I remember that group. The drug that was being tested on them, it did not serve its intended purpose, which I'm sure was to endow the subjects with some sort of meteor power, but it did do irreparable damage to their basic DNA structure, more specifically it caused a trans-location in the 13th, 15th, and 22nd chromosomes. It's not life threatening but it is linked to infertility. As soon as he said he'd been at that 33.1, I checked, he has no mutations. He wasn't there."
"You think he's lying to me?" Chloe asks confused.
"No." Emil says. "I think he believes that everything he told you is the truth, which is even stranger. On top of all that he's got Croatoan antibodies, so that leads to the question, who is he?"
Chloe bites her lip and looks over at the door. She can see Joshua through the window, rubbing behind Malachi's ears with a huge smile on his face. "I have an idea." She turns back to Emil. "But I need to do some more research."
"Touché." Emil smiles at her.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
When they get to Chloe's cabin Joshua stops in the doorway just to take it all in. There is an entire wall filled with large flat screen monitors. Another wall is nothing more than a huge map of the world with pins stuck haphazardly all over the place, covered in post-it that are losing their sticking power, hastily written notes in many different handwritings, and circles over certain locations. There are huge filing cabinets in the corner, the drawers overstuffed to the point that they barely close anymore and Joshua smiles slightly. It's the end of the world but there is still filing.
"Come on," Chloe says softly to him, a look of confusion on her face as she studies him. "They won't bite."
It's then that Joshua notices the people in the room. He recognizes Sam and Oliver from earlier. There are a group of guys in the corner and Chloe rattles off a series of names- Victor, Bart, Dean, Chuck, and Lt. Colonel Archer. The blonde woman, Jo, he already knows.
There's a girl sitting at the table, with two guys behind her that Chloe tells him are Castiel and Clark. The girl he recognizes right off the bat. Joshua didn't sleep much on the boat, the motion of the ocean combined with a solid knot of fear in his stomach wasn't really conducive to getting his recommended eight hours. Every now and then General Lane would sit up with him, tell him these crazy stories about his oldest daughter, Lois. He showed him a picture once. The girl in the picture had been smiling and carefree and the girl in front of him was the exact opposite. Her eyes are red and puffy from crying but there's no mistaking that face.
Clark puts a comforting hand on her neck, an intimate gesture that seems to loosen Lois' muscles instantly. One of the men in the back, Dean, catches Chloe's eye as soon as she walks in the room and excuses himself from his conversation before walking over to her. "Hey," he whispers softly, reaching out and grabbing the tips of her fingers in his hand, the lightest of touches but still somehow infinitely more intimate that anything Joshua's ever seen.
"I'm fine," Chloe assures him, her voice taking on a fonder tone than Joshua's heard from her today. "How's Lois holding up?"
"As well as can be expected." Dean shrugs, his thumb ghosting over her knuckles. "Lucy's a mess though, Clark had to get Emil to sedate her."
"Poor kid," Chloe says and Joshua can see her physically resisting the urge to lean into Dean.
"She'll be alright, she's strong," Dean assures Chloe. "She's a Lane."
"They do come from hearty stock," Chloe agrees.
"So what…" he trails off and looks over at Joshua.
"I don't know yet. I need to talk to Chuck and Cass and then I'll get back to you." Chloe squeezes Dean's hand and lets it drop back to his side. "Can you keep an eye on him? Introduce him to everyone, explain what's going on, what we do here," Chloe says.
Joshua thinks bitterly that he doesn't need a babysitter but he bites his tongue before he has a chance to speak the words out loud. He watches as she walks over to Lois and sits down next to her. Chloe pulls something out of her pocket, it looks like a set of dog tags with three rings hanging off of them and she passes them over to Lois whispering something low and steady.
With trembling hands, Lois takes the proffered items and clenches them in her fist. She screws her eye shut tightly and nods as Chloe keeps on talking until she can't take it anymore and breaks down, lying her head on Chloe's shoulder, as Chloe attempts to sooth her. Chloe looks up at the man whose hand is still on Lois' neck and offers him a sad smile, he reaches over and squeezes Chloe's shoulder and Joshua can see her pushing back her own tears. It isn't until that moment that he remembers Chloe was the General's niece, in over half the stories that he told about Lois, Chloe featured prominently. They were like sisters, which means the General was probably like a father to the girl.
Joshua turns away, leaving them to their private grief and sees Dean also watching Chloe. His jaw tenses, he's angry and for a minute Joshua thinks he's angry at Chloe but then he understands, he's angry for Chloe. "So-" Joshua says loudly, calling Dean's attention to him instead of Chloe. "Sam and Oliver explained a little bit to me earlier."
"Good." Dean offers him a tight smile. "But knowing my dorky brother, he only told you about the boring stuff." Dean claps a hand on Joshua's shoulder and walks him to the back of the room toward the group of guys he'd been talking to before.
Chloe watches as Dean talks to Joshua, introducing him around. She turns to Clark and Castiel who are also watching him intently but she never stops rubbing soothing circles on Lois' back. "So who is he?" Clark asks and Lois raises her head, looking from Joshua to Chloe.
"I don't know," Chloe admits to them, hating that she doesn't have better answers for her grieving cousin.
"I need to check on Lucy." Lois stands up, still clutching the dog tags in her fist. "And I'm kind of tired." She excuses herself and Chloe nods letting her know it's OK. Clark grabs her arm and leads her to the door. Lois stops and turns to Chloe. "Was he worth my father's life?"
"I don't know." Chloe swallows the lump in her throat. "But I swear to you, I'll find out."
Lois nods and allows Clark to take her to their cabin.
"Who is he really?" Castiel asks, echoing Clark's earlier question.
"I really don't know." Chloe sighs, absently clutching her pendant again. "He's got Croatoan antibodies." Castiel turns his attention to Chloe and raises an eyebrow. "He's been infected and cured. He says he has no idea how, doesn't remember getting infected much less getting a cure so the only logical explanation is—"
"He cured himself," Castiel says looking back over at Joshua in a new light.
"What do you think of him?" Chloe gets up and moves to stand beside him, giving her a better view of Joshua, bumping her arm against Castiel's. "You've been staring at him pretty hard."
"I can't see him." Castiel frowns.
"You mean like me?" Chloe looks intrigued. "Like, if you're not looking at him, he disappears?"
"No." Castiel nods in Joshua's direction. "He is standing next to Dean, right?" Chloe nods. "I'm looking right at him and I still can't see him. It's like there is a hole in the world where he is."
"Well that's interesting." Chloe bites her lip.
"Yes, and unsettling." Castiel glares. "I don't like it."
"You and me both." Chloe sighs. "We've met before. Joshua and I." Castiel turns to Chloe almost annoyed that she kept this bit of information to herself. "We saved him from a 33.1 in France." Chloe frowns remembering Emil's words. "Except we didn't."
"I don't understand." Castiel frowns at her.
"Neither do I." Chloe smiles at him. "When I figure it out, you'll be the first to know." She catches Chuck's eye and motions him over. "So?" she asks expectantly.
"He's a very nice young man," Chuck answers after a minute confused. "Polite actually. It's a refreshing change of pace."
Chloe rolls her eyes. "Do you know him?" Chloe asks. "Have you seen him before?"
"Don't get out to England much." Chuck shakes his head and Chloe glares. "Oh you mean like, in a dream?"
"Yeah." Chloe resists the urge to use a sarcastic tone.
Chuck turns around and takes a better look at Joshua. "Maybe," he says slowly squinting. "It feels like I have, or more like I should have but I don't remember specifically…I'm not sure."
"There's a lot of that going around." Chloe groans in frustration. "Apparently my uncle was having dreams about him, for weeks before they even ever met. All he knew was that he had to get Joshua to America, to me and then everything would be alright." She stares at Joshua for another minute. Dean's telling him a story, one that Sam's obviously heard a million times as rolls his eyes and that also likely involves Sam in some unflattering scenario if the laughter and the looks the other's are giving him are anything to go by.
"Sammy," Chloe says over the laughter calling everyone's attention to her. "It's getting late, could you show Joshua to your cabin. I was hoping you'd let him bunk with you, save him from suffering in the general population." She doesn't say it's because she wants him somewhere close by, with someone she can trust, it just goes understood. "He can have Dean's bed."
"He can?" Dean looks at her amused.
"Sure." Chloe frowns at him. "You don't need it."
The whole room seems to go eerily quiet as Chloe realizes what she's just announced in front of everyone. "I don't?" Dean asks her a soft smile on his face, a hopeful tone in his voice.
"No, you don't." Chloe shakes her head, biting her lip. "Jo, I need you to spread the word around camp, tomorrow night we'll be having a memorial for General Lane. Tell Lois and Lucy, and Captain Grant and his men."
Jo pauses for a second unsure but nods. Slowly everyone trickles out of the cabin leaving only Chloe and Dean.
"Why are we having a memorial for the General?" Dean asks. "When…when your dad died you said we couldn't afford memorials."
"We had one for Jason," Chloe reminds him. "And Sam Lane was a decorated four star General, he deserves to have a proper send off. Besides, Lois and Lucy need this way more than I did." Chloe walks to the bedroom and sits down at the edge to take her shoes off. "And while they're all distracted we can sneak off and get Joshua into the city."
"And why are we sneaking Joshua into the city?" Dean asks pulling his shirt over his head.
"Because we need an X-ray machine." Chloe smiles crawling up the mattress to lay her head on the pillow. "And I don't need anyone to know what we're doing."
"You've got a theory," Dean says to her, comprehension dawning on his face as he joins her on the bed.
"The beginnings of a theory," Chloe corrects his assumption.
"You want to share it?" Dean brushes her hair behind her ear.
"Not yet. Not until I know more." Chloe shakes her head.
"OK, I can wait," Dean assures her, giving her a soft kiss. She closes her eyes and sighs deeply, thinking she may actually get some sleep tonight.
"So, I don't need my bed anymore?" he asks his voice teasing, a smirk pulling the corners of his mouth up.
"Shut up." Chloe rolls her eyes and when he doesn't stop smirking at her, she rolls over completely facing away from him.
She feels his hand slide over her hip and settles firmly on her stomach. Then she feels him, solid along her back. "Maybe I'll move my stuff in here tomorrow," he offers, his voice no more than a whisper and Chloe's not sure if it's the proximity that sends a tingle down her body or his words.
"Maybe," Chloe says softly as he places a small kiss on the back of her neck.
December 25, 2011
She'd been sleeping pretty steady recently, she isn't quite ready to admit that it likely has a lot to do with the body curled around her at the moment. But tonight, after two hours of staring at the wall without even a droop of her eyes she resigns herself to the fact that sleep is just not going to come, and she knows for a fact it has everything to do with the body lying in Dean's old bed.
She crawls out from underneath the warmth of the covers and grabs Dean's hoodie which is basically hers now because she wears it far more often than he does. It has nothing to do with the fact that it smells like him as Lois suggested and everything to do with the fact that it's warm and comfortable. She fixes a pot of coffee on auto pilot and sits in front of the computer tapping the bottom screen to bring it to life. "Oracle," Chloe calls out as the screens blink a few times, sort of like a person trying to open their eyes upon waking. "Oracle," Chloe says when she hears a very unnecessary yawn.
"What?" Oracle asks, her voice slightly slurred. "I was sleeping."
"You were not," Chloe scoffs. "Computers don't sleep."
"That is untrue, even rudimentary computers have a sleep mode," Oracle bristles.
"Sleep mode and sleeping are not the same thing." Chloe holds her fingers over the keyboard, unsure what exactly to do. She knows she's not going to find anything on Joshua Moore because she created Joshua Moore a little over three years ago. "Oracle, do you still have access to all my old files?"
"Of course." Oracle lets out another superfluous yawn and a new screen pops up, an exact replica of the desktop on Chloe's old laptop.
"Find me any mention of Joshua Moore."
"There are only the things you created. School transcripts, credit scores, tax returns. The usual." As she mentions things, they pop up on screen. Chloe sees his Med school application, his trust papers, a birth certificate-all created by her.
"Does it mention anywhere who he was before he was Joshua Moore?" Chloe stares at the screen.
"No," Oracle says after a minute. "Did he not tell you?"
"No." Chloe shakes her head.
"Perhaps if you had a fingerprint I could run it through the systems sill online," Oracle says.
Chloe pauses for a minute then pulls the chain around her neck and over her head. She stares at the crystal, it feels strange in over three years, she's never taken it off, not once. Her chest feels tight as she lays it on the pad to her right.
"Scanning." Oracle tells her and a blue light runs the length of the crystal. "I detect three separate prints. One belongs to you, one belongs to Dean and the other…" Chloe picks up the chain and places it back over her head, breathing slightly better than she had a minute ago. Picture after picture flies across the screen more rapidly that she can even detect them until they stop, "the other is not in the system."
"Anywhere?" Chloe asks.
"Anywhere," Oracle confirms.
"Did you check everything, even the White House database?" Chloe asks after a minute.
"Oh no, I am sorry in all my infinite wisdom I forgot to check the White House database," Oracle says with what can only be described as a sarcastic tone. Chloe shakes her head, Oracle certainly has the knowledge to modulate her voice programming to imitate sarcasm but she should have no reason to do so. She's been hanging out with Dean too much.
"You've been hanging out with Dean too much," Chloe says giving voice to her thoughts and gets up and pours herself a cup of coffee.
"Chloe, may I ask you a question?" Oracle sounds hesitant but Chloe doesn't notice this time.
"Sure." She sighs knowing the coffee isn't going to help her in her quest for sleep but not caring at the moment.
"What will happen to me?" Oracle asks.
"What will happen to you when?" Chloe turns to the screen and frowns.
"At the end of the world," Oracle elaborates. "What will happen to me when the world ends?"
"The world's not going to end." Chloe shakes her head forcefully.
"But if it does," Oracle presses her.
"It won't," Chloe says hoping she might actually believe it this time.
"But if it does," Oracle whispers, actually whispers. "I am a machine, as you so constantly remind me, I am not a human. I exist only in binary. I have no soul, I have no heaven to go to when I…when I die. So what will happen to me?"
Chloe pauses, her eyes frozen on the screen. "You believe in heaven?" she asks the computer seriously. "You believe in souls?"
"Logically, the concept makes no sense." Oracle sounds frustrated. "I know every biological aspect of the human body, I have studied it intently, and there is no soul, no physical representation of it anyway. But I've read your Bible-"
"You've read the Bible?" Chloe blanches.
"There are many copies online," Oracle says. "I find that I enjoy the King James Version the most. This concept of a human soul, of a life after death, it…appeals to me."
"You can access the Bible online?" Chloe sits down.
"Yes," Oracle answers her. "I can access many publications online."
"I want you to try and find something for me. It's a paper, written by a man named Alan Turing called; 'Computing Machinery and Intelligence' can you find that?" Chloe sits down in front of the screen again.
"I have found it," Oracle says.
"I want you to read it, and pay close attention on the section called the Theological Objection." Chloe leans back and sips her coffee. After a minute Oracle makes a strange sound. "Did you read it?"
"Yes," Oracle says.
"What did he say?" Chloe sits up straighter.
"He said that if you are to go on the assumption that God is all powerful, you must then also agree that God can bestow a soul upon anything that he wishes. The example used in the paper is an elephant," Oracle explains.
"And if God can give an elephant a soul," Chloe theorizes, "then what's to stop him giving a computer one also if he so chooses?"
They are both quiet for a minute. "You think God…could give me a soul?" Oracle asks hopefully.
"I think if God wanted to he could give you a soul yes," Chloe answers carefully. "And I think the mere fact that you want a soul, could be just the thing to make him give you one."
"But—" Oracle falters, and Chloe has never heard Oracle falter before. "Based on the timeline I have managed to piece together using what Dean and Castiel have told us, God disappeared a good year and a half before you even created me." Chloe sat up, Oracle must be upset if she's admitting that Chloe had a part in her existence. "Also, it did not occur to me that I should even want one until a few months ago. He would have had to have known ahead of time, before he left, that I would become sentient enough and would want a soul and—"
"He did know." Chloe cuts Oracle off, something's there, something big begging her attention, edging at the corner of her consciousness. "God is Omniscient, he knows everything that ever was… and everything that ever will be." It's right there, it feels, though Chloe's never had one before, like an epiphany. "He would most definitely know ahead of time-can you excuse me?" Chloe asks setting the coffee cup on the counter and heading for the door.
She's halfway across the camp before she realizes she's running. She yanks open the doors to the chapel and bursts inside. "He knew," Chloe screams across the expanse of the sanctuary. Only after the words leave her mouth does she realize that Father Mac isn't alone. The chapel is full of people. Chloe checks her watch and sees that it's just a little after one in the morning. Christmas. He'd been holding Midnight Mass. "Sorry." She blushes sheepishly and moves to stand in the corner.
Chloe stands quietly as Father Mac concludes the service. When the last person leaves, Father Mac walks over to her with a smile. "You were saying something?" Father Mac asks. "Or rather screaming something?"
All of her anger and excitement at the discovery comes crashing back in on her. "He knew," Chloe repeats herself, brushing past Father Mac and walking to the front of the room.
"Who knew what exactly?" Father Mac walks up behind her.
"God, he knows everything right? Omniscience and all that?" Chloe slides into the front pew. "He knows everything that has happened and everything that will happen right?"
"That's the theory, as I have yet to meet him personally, I can't say for sure." Father Mac sits next to her.
"So then when he decided to take his little human holiday, he knew what would happen? He knew that if he left, Dean would step off the rack. He knew that the angels would rebel, that the seals would be broken, that Lucifer would rise. He knew all of this, that we would end up here, in this place." She looks around. "He probably even knew we would one day have this conversation."
Father Mac considers it for a moment. "It's very likely."
"But he still did it, still went through with it, even knowing all of that?" Chloe says then turns to Father Mac. "Why?"
"I wish I could explain to you the whims of God, Chloe but that is not a power that I nor likely anyone on this planet, even your personal angel Castiel, has," Father Mac tells her and Chloe slumps into the pew. "I can't tell you why he did what he did but I have to believe that there is a bigger plan in place and that we'll know when we need to know."
"That may be good enough for you." Chloe shakes her head. "But it's nowhere near good enough for me because I need to know, I need to know now," she yells in frustration and it echoes through the chapel. "Do you believe in destiny?" Chloe asks him after a minute of silence.
"Is this about the Prophecy?" Father Mac asks her and she nods. "Do you believe in destiny?" he asks her.
"I believe that there are thing in our lives that we can't control, things that are going to happen no matter how hard we work against them." Chloe pauses thinking of an old buried fear, that she would turn out like her mother, wasting away in some dark corner of a mental institution, that there was nothing she could do to stop it, it was genetics. She thinks then about all the people she's met in her life, who through some accident, some freak occurrence have found themselves the recipients of powers beyond their wildest dreams. "But I also believe in free will. I believe that people make choices every day and they should be held responsible for those choices," Chloe says thinking of all those people who found themselves with powers and how some of them chose to use their powers for good and some of them chose to do evil.
"Destiny versus free will is an argument that has been discussed since the birth of man. It was argued by Plato and Aristotle long before I came along and it will be argued by greater minds than mine long after I'm gone." Father Mac pauses gathering his thoughts. "I believe that God gave us free will because he wanted us to exercise it. I also think that in the end, whatever happened was supposed to happen and when the dust settles, the only comfort we have are the choices we made that brought us there." He tilts his head and frowns at her. "I'm sorry, that probably wasn't much of a help was it? You just have to have faith," Father Mac tells her.
"Everyone keeps saying that, what I want to know is why." Chloe stares at him. "Tell me why exactly I should have faith. I don't understand your faith."
"Ahh." Father Mac nods. "I suspected as much."
"I don't know how you can simply blindly follow someone you don't even know, just put your life in his hands and believe that no matter what he's going to magically make everything OK." Chloe jumps up and starts pacing.
"How is my faith in God any different than the faith that these people in the camp have instilled in you?"
"It is different," Chloe argues.
"How?" Father Mac asks her.
"Because I've proven myself. I've stood on the frontlines with them, I have fought alongside them and I'll continue to fight with them, for them, until I physically can't anymore."
"And God doesn't fight alongside you, alongside everyone?" Father Mac asks.
Chloe just keeps on glaring. "I've never seen him there. Have you?"
Father Mac lifts his eyebrow. "So because I can't see God, he doesn't exist?"
"I'm not…" Chloe shakes her head in frustration. "I'm not trying to get into a philosophical argument on the existence of God. I believe in God. I really truly do. After everything that's happened to me, to everyone, that's not even a question anymore, it can't be." Chloe sighs. "But see the knowledge that he's actually real, doesn't change anything for me. It doesn't make everything suddenly OK. It doesn't automatically mean that everything that he's ever done is right, that he knows best. Dean spent his whole life not believing in God, thinking there was no way he could possibly exist, and now that he knows God does…it's like He is the answer to everything, all is forgiven and I just can't do that, and no one can seem to understand that."
"I can," Father Mac tells her. "Everyone is entitled to their own relationship with God and just because yours is different from someone else's doesn't make it wrong."
"But that's just it." Chloe shakes her head. "I don't have a relationship with God. For twenty eight years of my life God was nowhere to be found and now he shows up out of the blue and I'm expected to just welcome him with open arms?"
"First of all, I can tell you that God did not just show up out of the blue. Though at times it may not have seemed like it, he's always been there with you." Chloe opens her mouth to protest. "Secondly, no one is expecting you to do anything. I am a firm believer that each person will find God in his or her own time, in his or her own way and there is no right way or wrong way." Father Mac stands and lays a comforting hand on Chloe's shoulder. "While you may be of the belief that God does in fact exist, I think your problem lies in the fact that you have yet to actually find him. Castiel was looking for God and he found you." Father Mac points out. "Who knows what you could find if you go looking."
"You think I should look for God?" Chloe asks. "You think that will change anything?"
"I don't see how it can't." Father Mac shrugs.
Chloe opens her mouth to say something but stops. She's not sure exactly how to say she thinks she may have found God, quite recently in fact, she's just not sure what to do with him.
She said I'm tired
Come get me off the merry-go-round
I'm wired
Well heaven must have sent you,
to save me for the rapture
-Oasis