A/N: Alright. I hope this chapter isn't disappointing. ^_^ And I hope it makes up for all that angst in the previous chapters and the last story. Thanks to all of you for reviewing that last chapter. Cheers to you all. This chapter is for you! Enjoy.

Chapter 14: Mending Hurts

Kakashi set a cup of tea on the dining table, in front of Iruka. The younger man was silent as Kakashi took his seat opposite him. Both of them had finally calmed down after the confession earlier on and they were beginning to think on clearer grounds, trying to piece things together and work it out.

Neither said a word. The atmosphere was tensed as they tried to decipher what the other was thinking. Finally, Kakashi raked a hand through his hand.

"Iruka, I……."

"First things first." The chunin stared into his eye. "Why didn't you look me up after you have recovered?"

"I……." Kakashi sighed. "I'm sorry."

Iruka reached over the table and placed a hand on the jounin's. Kakashi almost flinched at the contact.

"I don't want an apology, Kakashi. I want an explanation." Iruka pleaded softly, imploring for the jounin to speak his mind.

The silver-haired man looked away. Then he sighed, knowing that he has hidden from Iruka for long enough and that it is time for him to come clean. That's the least he could do to be fair to the younger man.

"I…… I didn't know how to face you, Iruka. I can't look at you without remembering all those hurt that I have done to you."

"I never blamed you for all that." Iruka's eyes softened. "You should know me better than that, Kakashi. You should know that I understood why you did all that. It wasn't your fault."

"I hurt you." Kakashi choked out. "That's a fact. No matter who was the one who caused it, it was a fact that I was the one who carried out that act."

Iruka withdrew his hand. He closed his eyes and he took in a deep breath.

"You didn't hurt me with those denials." Iruka started as he swallowed the lump in his throat. "You didn't hurt me with that punch. And you didn't hurt me with your words." The chunin opened his eyes and stared at the table.

"The time when you really hurt me deep was when you did not look for me after you have recovered. You hurt me when you did nothing to salvage our relationship. And you hurt me when you distant yourself from me, even when you remembered our relationship and you remembered who I was."

Kakashi was silent as guilt hit him. Iruka looked up from the table.

"I couldn't blame you when you lost your memories. No matter how much you denied me and our relationship, I still hang in there because I held on to the belief that you would recover one day." Tears welled up in the corner of the chunin's eyes. "But when you recovered and you did not look for me even once, I felt that hope slowly crumbling. And I began to question myself if you really do still love me or if you ever did."

Iruka paused, as he tried to keep down his emotions and stopped himself from breaking down. "I tried to tell myself that you need time to adjust back. Time and again, I convinced myself that I need to be patient and wait for you to come back. I waited. But every day, that hope just seems to get bleaker. And then, after hoping against a futile hope for such a long time, I'm finally convinced that you are never coming back and that it's really over between us."

Iruka bit on his lips as the tears flowed from his eyes. "I didn't want to believe it. But, it was a fact that I had to face. I knew I cannot hold on to a one-sided love anymore. And it really broke my heart when I have to believe that you no longer love me. That was when you hurt me the most, Kakashi."

"I do, Iruka." Kakashi's voice trembled. "My love for you has never wavered once."

"Now I know." Iruka smiled softly. "And at least, the most important question that I have has been answered."

"I never meant for this." The jounin pulled down his mask and rubbed his face. "I never meant to hurt you like that. I just wanted for you to be happy."

Iruka stared at the jounin, stunned for a second. Then he folded his arms on the top of the table. "Why would you think that I would be happy without you?"

"Why wouldn't you?" Kakashi swallowed hard. "You wouldn't have someone who is on the risk of failing you at any time. You wouldn't have to bear with someone who doesn't even know how to care for you. You would be able to pursue your own happiness without a burden to hold you back."

Iruka shook his head slowly and averted his gaze. "You think too little of our love, Kakashi. You think too little of my love for you." He paused. Then he lifted his gaze and met the jounin's. "The only time you failed me, was when you failed to give me a clear explanation and it led to the situation that we are in today. I have someone who cared for me. Or at least I had until you chose to leave me. And I didn't have to pursue any happiness. I had my happiness till you gave up on the relationship."

"I'm sorry." Kakashi mumbled, as another wave of guilt hitting him square in the chest.

"Kakashi, don't apologize. I just want you to tell me. What are we now?" Iruka watched him tentatively.

Kakashi was silent. And then, he shook his head slowly. "I… I don't know."

"We promised to work this out. We promised to talk things through. Don't give me such vague answers, Kakashi." Iruka pleaded softly, desperately holding on to that last bit of hope in his heart.

"I don't know, Iruka. I want to be fair to you." Kakashi buried his face in his hands. "I can't expect you to just take me back after what I have done to you. I can't expect you to pretend that nothing had happened and move back to the life that we used to lead. I can't treat you like that."

Iruka leaned over and held the jounin's hand. "It's alright, Kakashi. I can pretend nothing happened. As long as we can make things right again, I can forget everything and continue from where we left off."

"But I can't." The jounin raised his head and met the warm brown eyes of the chunin. "I want to make it up to you, Ruka. But…." He sighed and pulled back. "I want to be fair to you. I need some time to think things through."

The chair scrapped across the floor as the jounin pushed his chair back and stood up. He turned and stepped away from the table.

"Are you going to leave?" Iruka asked softly as he fought back the hurt. "Are you going to walk out on me again?"

Kakashi froze at the statement. He turned around slowly and almost flinched at the crestfallen look on Iruka's face. He felt the urge to just go over to the younger man's side and comfort him.

"Iruka……"

Iruka shook his head sadly as he stood up and limped over to where the jounin was standing. He stopped a few steps away and looked at him. "If you step out that door, then, take back all your words and your confessions from earlier on and don't ever look me up again. I don't need your lies to get on. If you leave now, then I will take it that it's really over between us. I won't hope for anything anymore."

Kakashi couldn't say a word. He looked up to meet the desperate gaze in the chunin's eyes. Iruka wanted him to stay. That much was obvious. The younger man was willing to give their relationship another try. So why was he still holding back? Did he really want to give up on their love, their life and seal the chunin out of his heart totally?

Deep down, he knew he can't. Iruka was his last anchor, holding him down to the reality of the world and keeping the last bit of sanity and humanity in him. Without the younger man, he knew he would sink into the darker depths of his mind and never surface from it again.

He took two stumbling steps towards the other man.

"Iruka….."

At the jounin's slight movements towards him, Iruka threw away his reservations and limped up to him, closing the last bit of distance between them. He threw his arms around the pale neck, as Kakashi tried to gather his thoughts together and react to Iruka.

"Don't leave." Iruka whimpered. "Don't leave me alone." His hands clutched on tightly to the jounin. Kakashi closed his eyes and wrapped his shaking arms around the lithe frame. He swallowed hard, knowing that this is the last chance that he has and if he is truly a genius, he should know that he needs to treasure it and hold on to it.

He pulled the younger man closer when he felt the chunin's tears hitting the exposed part of his neck. "I won't. I'm here to stay. As long as you will keep me, I will stay." His voice choked from the strain at the sight of his anguished lover.

The tears spill from the chunin's eyes and wrapped his arms tighter around Kakashi, burying his face in the broad shoulders and the tears staining the jounin's vest. Kakashi ran his trembling fingers through the brown locks soothingly as he whispered comforting words and soft promises.

"Don't go." Iruka whimpered. Kakashi felt his heart clenched tighter at the hopeless tone in the chunin's voice. He tightened his embrace and pulled the younger man closer.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm here, love. I'm here. Always will be." He pulled back a little, tilting the chunin's face and eyeing him guiltily. Then, he wiped the tears gently away from the tanned cheeks. "I know I'm not good enough for you, Iruka. But, I don't want to let go. I want to give this another try. I don't want to fail you again."

Iruka nodded as the jounin leaned forward and kissed away the tears, trailing gently across the cheeks and then, his lips pressed against Iruka's quivering ones. That lost warm feeling for so long filled Kakashi's senses.

Then, Iruka returned the kiss, hesitantly at first and slowly, he gave in more, as the months of pent up frustrations and emotions flowed through.

Kakashi reveled in the taste and the warmth that he had missed for so long, hugging tighter the one person that he had longed for every night. Finally, everything felt right. Finally, that void was filled again. Finally, Iruka is back in his arms.

Both of them stood in the dining area, holding each other close, long after the kiss broke. Nothing mattered as long as the other is there. Iruka closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around the jounin's waist as the arms around him held on to him.

And for the first time in a long while, a contented smile graced his lips.

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