Hello! :3

There is snow EVERYWHERE. I'm beyond excited. It'd be nice if the end of our driveway wasn't a gigantic snowdrift, though.

Thank you guys again for your reviews ... I've gotten some of the most amazing compliments from you. I'm so, so happy that I can make you smile with my stories.

I have a spooky-scary speech to give tomorrow in one of my classes, so pray for me. D: Rest assured, I'll be writing like crazy once that's over with.

Enjoy, and if you're in a place that has snow this time of year, please be careful!

Chapter 14

"Oh, I know, I know! It was a giant mutant weasel! Resurrected from the depths by its children."

Double Dee looked up from the textbook in his lap. Eddy dropped his pencil.

"…no, Ed," the genius finally uttered. "The answer for x isn't a giant mutant weasel."

"How'd you get to high school?" Eddy shot the slowest of the Eds a skeptical look, kicking wildly to balance himself as he reached over the edge of the bed to find his pencil.

"Prayer and persistence," Ed answered instantly, giving a pleased grin. Eddy raised an eyebrow.

"We're gonna need more than persistence to this scam rollin'." The shortest male paused to chew on his eraser, a molar catching on the metal fastening it to the pencil and making a tiny squeak. "If we play our cards right, we could get tons of people to come to our study group. Think of all the freshmen!"

Ed's lazy smile faded, replaced by a stare of horror. "Did freshmen do it, Eddy?"

"Gentlemen, please!"

The pair looked at their brilliant friend, Ed blinking his right eye and then his left, Eddy once again gnawing on his writing utensil.

"We have to stay on task! Do you have any idea how rare it is to be given an additional day to study for final exams?"

"Studying stinks," Eddy growled. The genius made a concerted effort not to gag at the saliva glimmering on his friend's mangled eraser. "Stupid Jonny, gettin' a whole extra week. Don't teachers take vacation? Why couldn't my house get hit by a tornado?"

"Did a tornado do it, Eddy?!" The alarm was now written plainly across Ed's face.

"Quit it, Lumpy," the shortest of the Eds snapped back. He glanced over his shoulder towards the rumble of backhoes and dump trucks. "We should be out there goin' through junk…"

"Plus sign plus minus sign equals an equal divided by a square," agreed Ed. The beeping of heavy machinery reversing seemed oddly fitting, Double Dee thought.

"The city hired its own workers to do it to avoid any lawsuits or gas line damage, Eddy. You know how overbearing the local legislature has become."

"BEARS," Ed bellowed, and Eddy jumped so hard he fell backwards off of his mattress. "Did bears attack you, Double Dee?!"

"Oh, um…" The genius's face heated up as clasped his hands. The constant muted shouting of a million guilty worries eagerly crashed over his thoughts. Of course someone had noticed something. Had his window been cracked? Had a bruise poked out from under the collar of the shirt he'd been wearing yesterday?

Swallowing thickly, the ravenette hunched his shoulders, subconsciously covering more of his neck with his shirt. "Why, Ed, I haven't the slightest idea what you're talking about."

"Yesterday, Double Dee," Ed insisted, as if his sockheaded friend was an utter moron. "You looked like a piece of gum stuck to a shoe. Oh, were you saving chickens too?"

"W-well, I-" Edd swallowed, now tangling his fingers together nervously. Eddy was eyeing him suspiciously. "I did seek shelter in the basement when it became apparent that the winds were approaching dangerous levels. That should account for any disheveled appearance, yes?"

The yellow-skinned boy leaned toward Eddy, holding a hand before his face to obscure his words. "I think bears did it, Eddy."

"Don't worry 'bout it, Ed," the shortest of the trio replied, turning his attention back to the study guide he was doodling on. "Double Dee's got secrets now. It's none of our business."

"Oh, come now, Eddy." The genius glared at his best friend, the pounding of his heart met with a painful twist of his stomach at the other's words. "Surely you have a few secrets of your own, and Ed and I respect that. Everyone appreciates a certain measure of privacy."

The shortest Ed glanced up at the ravenette wordlessly before putting his pencil back into his mouth. "Whatever. Teach us algebra already."

Frown tugging at his lips, Double Dee glanced back at Ed's neutral expression before turning his attention to the equations in his book.

-x-

The guttural rumble of a backhoe's hydraulics thrummed through the earth, rattling the back of Kevin's throat and prompting him to clear it for the hundredth time. "Dude," he called, pulling his hands from his pockets and shuffling from foot to foot. "Quit it already."

The teal-haired male ignored him and dropped to the ground. "No, I'm gonna make it."

"You're gonna die."

"No, I'm gonna make it."

The redhead rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, and Nat crouched, wiggling his butt comically before leaping for the top of Rolf's fence. His fingers hooked over the boards and his immaculate white shoes scuffed the wood for purchase. The jock looked away, unable to bear the secondhand embarrassment any longer, ignoring the hyperactive teen's shout about "fuckin' splinters."

"Give it a rest already, Nat."

Thwumping back to the ground, Nathan brushed off his shirt before pulling a tiny sliver of wood from his palm. "Ugh. Kev, come on. Just put me on your shoulders so I can see. I'm not leaving until we do this."

"Man, no. Why do you always gotta turn everything into some weird thing where your junk is too close to my face and you're doing something you could get arrested for?"

The shorter teen huffed melodramatically, throwing his arms up in frustration. "My thighs are like a fucking shiatsu massage and you know it."

"And I wish I didn't," the redhead retorted. Nathan narrowed his eyes, sticking his bottom jaw out. It was The Look of A Thousand Staredowns, and Kevin had grown far too wise to fight it. "Just don't get my shirt dirty," the jock muttered, refusing to acknowledge his friend's triumphant squeal.

Approximately twenty seconds later, the iridescent flash of Nathan Goldberg's hair bobbed over the edge of Rolf's fence, wobbling to and fro before his arms flew out to steady himself. His bright gaze scanned the property and he pointedly ignored the loud swear from below. "There he is! Rolf! Rolf!"

Kevin glared at a knot in the fencing, trying to steady his friend while keeping his hands as far away as possible from his backside.

"Rooollllllf! Rolf. Rolf! Rolf? ROLF."

Finally, the foreigner turned and squinted over his shoulder. His mouth moved, the high cadence of his voice rising just barely above the roar of machinery. Nat wiggled violently, sending Kevin into a string of curses as he re-planted his feet. "WHAAAT?" Nat screamed.

"Yes!" Rolf's voice slowly became intelligible as he approached, wiping the sweat from his forehead. He'd arranged the splintered branches into a pile next to the barn and was tossing shingles and siding into a wheelbarrow. "What do you want, birds-and-the-bees Nathan?"

"Hey, can we help with anything?" Kevin attempted to squint between two of the vertical boards, finding only a tiny slit of light.

"Your olive branch of misguided pleasantries is acknowledged, but this is the duty of a son of a shepherd."

"But-"

"Good day! Goodbye! Gersploosh!"

"What?"

"Okay, Nat," the redhead grunted from beneath, "Get your junk off the back of my neck, man."

"But - aaah, okay." The shorter male cautiously dropped down, caught by the redhead's elbows fitting into his knees. He grabbed at Kevin's collarbone, making the jock wheeze, and upon catching sight of Kevin's scowl when he looked over his shoulder, Nat released his grasp, his back hitting the ground with a whump.

Kevin hadn't had the opportunity to let go of Nathan's legs when a familiar voice rang out behind them.

"There you guys are … uh … yeah. Why is it that you guys are doing something that looks both gay and illegal every time I see you together?"

Nat grinned up at the cheerleader. "Greetin's, fair lady."

Kevin let go of his friend's knees, and the green-haired boy grunted when his feet fell to the grass. "Heya, Nazz."

"Hi," the blonde replied, one eyebrow rising until it disappeared behind her bangs. "I was gonna ask you guys if you wanted to hang out with me, but if you're busy-"

"Nah, that's cool." Kevin glowered at Nat, still sprawled out on the ground. Nat pointedly ignored him.

"Rolf won't let us help him clean up his yard." The teal-haired male scrambled to his feet, brushing his sweater off and running a hand through his hair. "So now we're bored."

"I made cookies if you want some," responded Nazz, interrupting before Kevin could protest his friend's inclusive sentence. The redhead had clamped his mouth shut, and when he opened it again to accept, Nat drowned him out with a squeal. He'd sprinted off toward the blonde girl's house before Nazz could blink.

-x-

Not thirty minutes later, the trio had gone through nearly two batches of chocolate chip cookies and a single batch of snickerdoodles. Nazz was halfway through a Sprite, as was Kevin, his bendy-straw included without having to ask.

Nathan sat across from the pair, one arm hanging over the back of Nazz's chair. He had pinned three bows in his hair in front of her mirror before slathering on a coral-colored product she'd identified as "lip stain balm," taking up the habit of neurotically touching it up every few minutes. He had finished three Sprites and a Mountain Dew.

"Anyway, it just sucks. I'm really worried about her. Mom told her she could come and stay here if she needed to, but then we felt really bad, because, like, we can't invite Emmett to come out. Mom thinks the last thing this neighborhood needs is another teenage boy."

"Bullshit," Nat chirped, taking a noisy gulp of his pop. "The more butts, the better."

"Yeah? Then he should stay at your house," Kevin uttered dryly.

The teal-haired boy shrugged, an action greatly hindered by the fact that the arm he'd draped over the back of the chair was asleep. "Hey, if rent can be paid in booty access, I'm in."

Nazz set her Sprite down on a pile of beauty magazines, licking her lips and smiling slyly. "Speaking of booty…"

When Nat blinked, his eyes going wide and flicking from the blonde to Kevin, the redhead turned to find his best friend fixing him with a look that made his stomach sink to the floor. "Uh…"

"Dude." Nat wriggled around until he was sitting up straight. "Dude. What?"

"Oh my God," the jock murmured, lifting his hands as if to shield himself. "Don't."

"Kevin's seeing somebody."

The redhead had time to flinch before the hyperactive male screeched. "DUDE."

Hiding his blush beneath a scowl, he glared at the floor. "Seriously, Nazz?"

"DUUUUUDE." Nat kicked his feet violently. "Is he really?"

In reply, the blonde reached over and yanked the redhead's shirt up to reveal the deep, crisscrossing claw marks lining his ribs. When Kevin had swatted the cheerleader away and leapt halfway across the bed, he turned back to Nathan, mouth opening and closing in desperation for any believable explanation. The teal-haired male's enormous, open-mouthed smile was framed by his hands, which he'd clapped to his cheeks.

"Yep." Nazz nodded, satisfaction oozing from her voice. "He spent the whole day yesterday running around shirtless. I can't believe nobody said anything."

"That's because normal people were focused on the tornado." Kevin returned to frowning at Nazz's carpet, a hand absentmindedly smoothing his shirt down over the scratches. The chair creaked loudly as Nathan wiggled around on it.

"Shush. Now's the time for girl talk, not being a big ole brooding hunk." When Nazz giggled, Nat talked over her. "Blonde?"

"God dammit, Nat."

"No, not blonde. Brunette?"

The ADD-riddled teen and the cheerleader were met with a burning, embarrassment-filled silence.

"Redhead? Oh. God. It's not Sarah. Is it Sarah? Please tell me it isn't Sarah."

"It's not Sarah," Nazz and Kevin replied, nearly in tandem.

"Whoo! Thank Jesus. Is it someone I know? Tell me, Kevin, is the tuchus a work of art like nothing you've ever seen before?"

"Sorta..." Nazz covered her smile with one hand, and Kevin cursed the way his heart fluttered and his gut twisted painfully when he visualized the adorably petite individual in question.

"He won't tell me who it is, though." Nazz nudged the redhead with her foot.

"Good thing I'm the greatest officially unofficial detective Peach Creek as ever seen." Nathan tipped a pair of invisible sunglasses down to sit over his eyes. "I charge a simple flat rate of one booty grab per hour of service."

Nazz quirked an eyebrow. "How many booty-grabs of my lip stain do you think you're wearing?"

The fidgety kid's grin faded. "God dammit."

Undeterred, the blonde returned her long-lashed gaze to Kevin. "Whoever it is, if you look this bad, they're probably in a full-body cast."

"Everything's fine, Nazz." Swallowing, the redhead met her eyes for a moment before looking away. "Everything's cool."

"More like hot," Nat supplied unnecessarily. "Your abs look like a giant tic-tac-toe board, dude."

"Are you into, like, weird stuff? Kevin, are you into bondage?"

"You're givin' me a headache, Nazz."

When neither the cheerleader nor the teal-haired boy babbled over him with demanding, teasing questions, Kevin let out a long, quiet breath and looked up. The two were watching him with stares so intense that the jock felt naked.

Settling into a position that covered his lap with his arms, Kevin rasped, "I'm not gonna tell you who it is."

"Oh, we'll find out," the pair echoed. The jock felt all the blood drain from his face.

"I sure as hell hope not."

Eeek. I hope I wrote Nat right. :x