"I wouldn't want to belong to any club that would accept me as a member." -Groucho Marx
Prompt: How is Callie adjusting to lesbian land now? Being a lesbian mom, dealing with lesbian friends. Rated T. 341 words.
"So, Callie," Natalie says over the din of the bar. "How does it feel to be one of us now?"
Callie furrows her brow. "One of who?"
"Us," Irene, Natalie's wife, laughs. "The lesbian mommies club. You've joined the ranks." Callie looks around at the group she's with. Natalie and Irene have a baby. Beth and Jamie have a four-year-old. Arizona chats at the bar with Ruth, who's pregnant with Phoebe's child.
"So," Natalie says again. "How does it feel?"
Callie places her glass on the table with an authoritative clang. "I'm not a lesbian mommy," she declares. Everyone within earshot looks at her strangely. "I'm a mother and I'm married to a woman. I wasn't aware that stuck me in the 'lesbian mommy' box."
Irene raises her eyebrows, backpedaling. "We just meant –"
"No, really," Callie presses on. "This is interesting. So does my being married to Arizona negate the fact that I slept with a man to have a baby in the first place? Never mind that I'm not actually a lesbian. You're willing to overlook that now that I've, what, done what's expected of me?" Callie scoffs. "Do I get my toaster now?"
Arizona returns to the table just in time to see a pissed-off Callie take a long swig of beer while no one else makes eye contact. "What did I miss?"
Callie swallows. "I love Arizona," she declares. "More than anyone else, man or woman. We have a baby together, with a man. I don't love my wife because she's a woman. I love her because she's Arizona and she-she's perfect." She swallows and looks at Arizona, who's taking it all in with a wide-eyed gaze. "I love my wife and I love my daughter. That'swho I am." She places a tender kiss on Arizona's cheek. The rest of the table is speechless.
"I don't know what just happened," Arizona says, "but I think I liked it."
Callie chuckles, then rolls her eyes at the situation. "Ready to go home?"
Arizona beams. "With you? Always."