My father keeps sending me emails telling me he has the fourth book (that it's arrived) and keeps teasing me about it! Some father! I'm so annoyed! Sorry, I just love this rant and I can't stop. Twitches.

And I've been feeling really excited lately, like just really energetic. But here's the thing; I don't know why! How weird is that?

Okay so there isn't going to be much left to this I don't think; no more than twenty chapters total. Maybe. I don't really know.

And I'm sorry for the lack of editing (if there are any mistakes) but I'm feeling like...well...crap, and I don't want to beta right now. Any mistakes will be corrected, just not right now.

Love you all and thank you for being so patient!

x

Alice's Take

"No!" I screeched, looking imploringly between Esme and Carlisle; they couldn't do this.

"Alice, please try to understand."

"I do understand! We can't leave! What if he comes back and finds no one here? He won't know where we've gone!"

Their eyes flickered to each other's worriedly, then back to mine. I could tell what they were thinking – you didn't need to be a mind reader to figure it out. They thought I was in denial, that I wanted Edward to exist again, so I imagined he did.

But he did. I had seen him. And he was beautiful; a vampire, deadly and powerful and so amazingly focused. I hadn't seen what he was doing, but his task had taken him close to home, and I can't imagine him just passing us by. Unless he didn't remember us. But I had to believe he would; he could.

"Alice," Esme said slowly, like talking to a five year old. Hah, I'm old enough to be her great grandmother. "I know that you think Edward will come back, but what if he doesn't? Forks has too many memories for us to stay. It wouldn't be fair to the rest of the family."

"We can't leave him!" I fell to my knees then, overcome by another vision.

Edward was there, looking up at the burnt remains of the house. There was someone at his side, and though I couldn't see her face, I knew it was Bella. She took his hand and traced soothing patterns on his palm as he simply stared up at the house, unmoving and unspeaking.

It broke my heart to watch.

I had to convince them to stay.

When I opened my eyes I saw Esme, Carlisle and Jasper watching me with concern. I sighed and straightened myself up, pulling Jasper along behind me.

"Alice! Where are you going?" Esme hurried to keep up with us; I was trying hard and failing to keep a human pace. Jasper said nothing.

"Somewhere," I hissed. I had a few ideas where Bella would take Edward; wherever it was remote, isolated, cold and cloudy.

"Alice, I understand you're upset, but please don't break the family up any more than it is." Her voice was becoming thick with unshed tears and I stopped, heaving a sigh, and turned around to face her, pulling her into a gentle – even for a human – hug.

"I promise that I won't be gone for long. And I'll bring Edward back. I know he's alive, Esme." Her shoulders started shaking as she began to cry. "Edward's alive, and he's coming back. Trust me." I pulled away from her slowly, once again dragging Jasper towards the garage.

"We'll be back so quickly you won't have time to miss us!" I called with false cheerfulness as we got into the car – my yellow Porsche – and pulled out of the driveway. I very pointedly ignored the faces in the rear view mirror. The entire family – well, what was left – had gathered in the front, each with different expressions of sorrow and confusion on their faces.

Esme was still sobbing.

Edward's Take

I had spent the past few days staring at the fire. I wanted to get over this stupid fear I had. I had been born from fire and into fire; I had no reason to fear it anymore. Burning wood should not have this hold over me.

Yet every time the wood shifted, making the flames leap up, I flinched and shied away. It was infuriating.

Bella and I had stayed in the little log cabin since my change, and I had quickly settled into the life here. I was still getting used to the whole not-sleeping thing, but I was enjoying being here, with her, and no one else.

I loved her. It was obvious to both of us, yet neither one was willing to take it any further. We were both content to simply be in the same house. I hoped that our relationship would flourish eventually, but I wasn't going to rush her; she was too precious to risk losing.

I could hear the faint sounds of a guitar being played from downstairs and smiled, closing my eyes and focusing on the notes as she played. The sounds were being played so fast that I'm sure human eyes would not be able to follow her fingers as she strummed through different riffs, each tune molding into another. She often did this when she was thinking, the notes playing according to what she thought and felt. Right now it was slow, unhurried, methodical. I laid back on the floor of the room allocated as mine and listened.

Soon after I sat up, hearing a faint roar in the distance. I frowned; the sound was unfamiliar. I glanced at the clock and with surprise noted that I had been listening to Bella playing for three hours. She had shifted to a slow pace a few minutes ago, her fingers weaving beautiful sounds that filled the house. It was happy and sad all at the same time, and made my still heart skip at the sound of it.

The roar was getting louder, and with displeasure I heard her stop playing; she had heard the sound too.

In a flash I was downstairs, looking out the window to the front house. I saw a black…thing in the distance. It was huge, and I recognized it eventually as a giant black monster jeep. The sight reminded me painfully of Emmett's car, and I pulled away from the window, sitting down on the couch with my legs curled up at my folded arms resting on my knees, my chin on top of them. I stared silently at the wall, waiting for the visitors to either stop or move on.

I heard them talking as they came closer. They were all excited about meeting the 'newbie', and I abruptly realized that they meant me. I frowned at the term. Was being a vampire like a game to them? It certainly wasn't to me, but perhaps I would lighten up about it after a few years. I knew that most of my angst was impatience at not being able to see my family and have them know I'm alive. Well, as much as I could be, anyway.

The roar of the engine was deafening, and the silence was stifling as it was cut off. I heard three sets of feet and three voices, and Bella ran to greet them at the door.

"Hey you three!" her beautiful voice called. I closed my eyes, wanting nothing more than to just listen to her talk for hours on end. She always managed to soothe me when it became too much, and I loved her all the more for it. I got the feeling that she had never done this before, taking care of another, especially a vampire, so I was impressed with how she was handling it. I was sure that I wasn't making it any easier.

"Hi, Bella! Wow, it's been ages since you came to live back here, though I can't say I'm surprised. So…where is he?" The female voice was filled with barely disguised excitement, and I heard another – a male – chuckle.

"Don't scare him too much; newborns are skittish."

There was a light snort of derision and I felt the female move to where Bella had no doubt gestured – to the entrance of the living room where I sat. I wasn't facing them, but I simply closed my eyes and listened, focusing.

'Okay…three…two…one!' I opened my eyes as I heard the female leap up behind me. I spun around, pulling her by her arm forward, using her momentum, and followed behind, ending up pinning her against the wall. She grinned at me and I smiled back, recognizing her.

"Hello Victoria."

"Hey Edward, nice to see you again."

"Same here." I let her go, moving back to the couch. "You need to work on your technique though."

"You heard me?"

"Kind of hard not to."

The other two – Laurent and James – laughed and Bella smiled at me. I returned it and sat back down.

"He's fast." 'And strong.'

"Aren't all newborns?"

"I suppose, but still, that was impressive. Victoria's a master at sneaking up on people."

'You would know.' The innuendo in the voice was…disturbing to say the least. I groaned, holding my head in my hands.

"Laurent please," I said, "keep the scenarios PG. I swear that mental image will stay with me forever."

They were all surprised, that I could tell.

"Laurent, what's he talking about?"

"No idea."

Pause.

"Alright then. Say Bella, what's the game like around here?"

"There's lots of moose and bears, mostly. A couple of mountain lions but I think Edward ate them all." 'And looked damn sexy doing it.'

I turned to Bella, surprised. "Excuse me? What did you say?"

She seemed taken aback by the intensity of my question, and repeated her answer, slowly; testing out each word for something she may have said wrong. "Mostly moose and bears…and a few mountain lions…but you may have eaten them all…" They were all staring at me, confused, and I turned back to staring at the wall, equally puzzled. There was another pause, and then she continued, "You guys thirsty? I'm sure Edward wouldn't mind joining us for another hunt. Always thirsty."

They each laughed, and I smiled too. I liked hunting, now that I had gotten used to it. I loved the thrill of the chase and the adrenaline that came with fighting and knowing you would win. Hunting was incredible, to say the least.

"Yeah sure, let's go."

I jumped to my feet, following them as they headed out of the door. The sun was shining in the freezing morning air and it set all of us sparkling like million-faceted diamonds. It was the first time I had seen it happen in a while – and only my second time seeing it at all; I had witnessed it once with Bella, hunting – and I felt a smile spread over my face as eagerness overcame me, and I shot off into the forest, not even bothering to wait for everyone else. I had discovered that I was much faster than any other vampire older then a couple of years, and I had no desire to slow myself down.

"Christ he's fast," I heard James say behind me, his voice rapidly fading.

"Yeah, I know." At first I though that she wounded wistful, but put the thoughts out of my mind when a came across the scents of moose, and took off in that direction.

The hunt was on.

Bella's Take

He looks so happy and content when he runs…so…free.

I followed him, having caught the scent of the moose myself, and James and Laurent broke off, heading in another direction while Victoria followed us behind. I slowly gave myself over to my senses when I heard the sounds of a herd coming closer and closer. Venom pooled in my mouth at the scents and I pushed myself faster.

I found a large herd of the animals in a clearing, all chomping on grass and blissfully unaware of the three predators bearing down on them.

But I couldn't see Edward. It wasn't like him to waste time; he usually attacked as soon as he saw the prey. Where was he, then? Perhaps he had found something better, but no; newborns hardly controlled themselves when hunting. They found a scent and focused on it, they didn't change course halfway through.

Unless…

I sniffed the air cautiously; aware of how close I was to losing myself to my hunger. I caught it, faint but there. Human.

Oh God.

Victoria noticed it too. Her eyes were slowly coming from the flat black of a hunter to the dark gold that she had possessed in the house.

"If Edward…"

"Did he?"

We both looked at each other.

"We have to go."

"Yes."

We ran towards the scent. I kept my senses pricked for any sign of Edward's passing.

I found him quickly. He was crouched low, hidden in the shadows cast by the trees and bushes in the forest. Looking ahead, I saw three tents dimly lit by torches as the humans prepared to get up for the day. Edward growled low as the wind shifted, bringing their scent strongly towards them. They didn't smell particularly nice to me; their blood was thick with impurities, but Edward obviously liked it. He took a few steps forward, then stopped. His expression was torn, and I knew that he was fighting against the urge to kill mercilessly. He was fighting the monster I had turned him into. Guilt surged through me even as I crept up on him from the side, in plain sight. He turned to look at me, and for a second I thought that he was returning to sanity, slowly getting over his bloodlust.

How wrong I was.

The wind shifted again, blowing the scents even more strongly in our direction, and he snapped. Quicker than even my eyes could follow, he ran forward and jumped on the nearest tent, shredding the material in seconds. There was a startled cry from the occupant, and I tried to race forward, to tackle him away, but I was too late.

Victoria and I both landed on him, pulling him away from the rapidly weakening human, but he was latched on like a parasite, drinking greedily, unheeding of the blood that ran down his chin and pooled into a stain on the ground.

I sensed James and Laurent drawn closer by the blood. They quickly surveyed the scene and came forward to help Victoria and I, who were now holding Edward down with all we had, the dead human forgotten. He was snarling viciously, his teeth snapping together as he tried to get to the remaining tents. Mercifully, the humans in the remaining tents had stilled, thinking that it was an animal outside.

Hell, it was an animal. Edward had been reduced to the primal savagery of our kind. He looked so inhuman, but so beautiful, even lost in bloodlust as he was. Thankfully James and Laurent provided the strength necessary to hold him down, and we kept him pinned until he stopped thrashing and returned to himself. His eyes were now the color of wine and I felt sadness overwhelm me. He had been doing so well.

I sat by his head, stroking his hair soothingly as he returned to himself, Victoria, James and Laurent watched on in silence, unmoving save to keep him still. His eyes focused eventually, and he sat up quickly, looking at the scene around him. His expression was full of self-loathing. He had realized immediately what he had done. His fingers were shaking as he ran them along his jaw, were the blood was rapidly drying. He studied his red fingertips for a long time before his hand clenched into a fist.

"I'm a monster," were the only words he spoke. None of us had the heart to contradict him.

"Come on, Edward," I said gently, pulling him to his feet. The others got up around him, subtly making a line between him and the other humans as I led him back towards the house. "Let's get you cleaned up."

He didn't protest. He didn't say anything as I led him into his room and pulled out some clean clothes for him, nudging him gently towards the shower. When I heard the hot water running I crept in quietly, getting the bloodstained clothes into a pile. I carried them out to the backyard where there was a patch of scorched grass in the corner for this precise use. I poured a small amount of gasoline on the soiled clothing and lit the match. The fire leapt up and consumed the fabric quickly.

When I went back inside Victoria, Laurent and James were sat on the couch. They all turned to look at me and I said nothing, sitting down on the floor and leaning against the couch between my sire's legs. He smiled and stroked my hair like he used to, like when I had lost control once…and slipped up. How strange to be on the other end of the occurrence. It brought a lot of things into perspective.

"Bella, you did nothing wrong, stop worrying," said Laurent and I tilted my head up to look at him, forcing a smile.

"I know, but I shouldn't have let him run off like that. I could have…"

"Could have what? He would have killed you to get to the humans. You almost killed me many times," he chuckled a little at the memory, still stroking my hair, "and every time I calmed you down afterwards, and accepted your apologies, and made you feel better. You need to do this for him now, and he'll thank you for it. It's not your fault, and it's not his. It's what we are, and the only thing that we can do is try and better ourselves. Edward wants to learn, Bella, you just have to help him and he'll do fine."

The room was silent for a few moments; contemplation was tangible in the room.

Edward came downstairs silently, his hair still damp from the shower. He sat himself down in the only solitary chair in the room and returned – as was his habit – to staring at the fire. He would flinch every now and again, and my heart went out to him, but I knew that he would prefer to be alone, and brood. I needed to give him space, and he would come to me when he was ready.

Laurent's eyes were focused on Edward as he continued to absently stroke my hair. Edward didn't move for a very long time, but he kept tensing every now and again, like something was upsetting him, and he would get over it very quickly. All of a sudden his head snapped up, to glare at Laurent. He hissed and disappeared out of the room, his footsteps barely audible as he went to his bedroom and slammed the door. I heard his heavy sigh upstairs and the creak of the bed as he flopped down on it.

"What did you do?" I asked Laurent, staring up at him, my brow wrinkled in confusion.

Laurent smiled a little, his eyes bright.

"Go ask him yourself."

Before I could ask him any more questions the three of them had left the room. When I tried to chase after them I was just in time to see the jeep driving away. I could have outrun it and caught up, but I was unwilling to leave Edward alone, even for a second.

I went upstairs and sat in the hallway, opposite the door to his room. 'Go ask him yourself'. What the hell was Laurent playing at? I felt a surge of familiar annoyance towards my old sire and mentor. He always had to be so damn cryptic. But my curiosity was insatiable. I wanted to know what had him so upset, and how Laurent simply looking at him could set him off so.

I got to me feet, taking a deep unneeded breath, and my fingers closed around the handle. I let my breath out as I slowly opened the door. Edward looked up from where he had laid down on the bed, staring moodily at the wall, and his eyes flashed with some unknown emotion.

"Can we talk?"

Okay, so the italic speech is thoughts in someone's head. I didn't want Edward to figure out his gift straight away, and I wanted the thoughts to seem like someone was talking, so there we go, all explained nicely for you.

Thanks for the patience!

Love you all!

x