A/N: [Please read this bold part: I'm taking some artistic license and saying it takes three days of travel by foot to get from the canyon to the bay because there was a scene/time skip in the show. Also, if anyone is interested in being a Beta, feel free to message me!] Keeping it short and simple this time: this past LoK episode was amazing, the plot for this story is about to thicken (and no more spoilers from me in the A/N section), and remember that nothing I write is random—I mostly don't do one-off characters.
Edit: A special thank-you goes to JackieStarSister and Kimberly T for pointing out some mistakes that have now been corrected. Good eyes! :D
We spend the next few hours following the map towards the Serpent's Pass, which looks another good few days worth of walking away. Zuko leads the group, map in hand, with Sokka and Toph tagging along close behind. My brother and the earthbender chat and occasionally rope Zuko into the conversation. I'd pay them more mind, but there's Aang to keep me occupied. Not because he's talking but the opposite: he's drifting further and further back, looking up at the sky and sun. Focusing on the wide and cloudless day like his mind is in some distant place.
"Hey, you okay?" I say, falling into step beside him.
He shrugs but keeps quiet. We plod on down the dirt road we're following, a path the sun has baked to perfection. Yellowed patches of grass march up and down the edges. Everything around here, even us, could all do with a drizzle of cooling water. A touch of the healing rain can do wonders for tired travelers.
Around noon we cross a bridge with a river running beneath. Strange how alive this one place could be, even bright flowers blooming on its banks when a few minutes of walking in either direction brings you back to dead grass and bare dirt. As we come to the high curve of the bridge, I stop and lean on the railing. Aang pauses beside me, looking down into the current. I want to climb down to the river bed and practice waterbending together with him like we used to, back before everything got so complicated with the eclipse and the Fire Lord and his son joining the fight against his father. Zuko looks back to check if the rest of the team is keeping up, a motion I notice. Maybe he keeps his eyes longer on me than on the others, or maybe I'm just making things up now. There's a lot more tangled up in my mind than I want to have in there. Like the idea of maybe liking two people at once. And how to get rid of this unwelcome feeling for a person who's barely even my friend.
"Aang." His name comes out of my mouth without me realizing I'm saying it. I think my brain knew I needed a distraction.
He goes down the bridge, and I follow him along the dirt path again. "Yeah?" he says.
"Thought share?"
He blinks. "Huh?"
"When Sokka and I used to get mad at each other as little kids—you know, I threw a snowball at his head, he ate the last of the sea prune stew—our mother sat us down and made us do a 'thought share.' That's when we each had sixty seconds to spill out every single thing that came into our heads during our allowed time. Once we had all our feelings out, we didn't feel as bad."
"Um . . . I guess."
"Here, let me start." I look around for something to give me inspiration. "That tree over there looks like it needs some water, and actually everything around here looks like it could use some water, and you know what I want right now? I want to go practice waterbending with you in that river we just passed. But you know why we can't? Zuko's keeping up the pace and he won't stop for us. He's not the kind of person who'd make room for anyone, ever, in his entire life. It kind of makes me wonder how he managed to get along with his uncle at all. And that's something else: when we find Iroh, he's teaching me how to make his amazing tea. Though I like your tea too, Aang—and it's your turn."
He's barely hiding a smile now. "Well, okay. Hmm . . . today's sky has a really good shade of blue. It reminds me of the ocean and your eyes. Um . . ."
"You can't stop," I tell him. "That's the only rule. Just keep going, you were doing great."
He twiddles his thumbs. "But what if I say something I don't even realize I'm about to say?"
"That's the fun part. You find out a lot about yourself, too."
He takes a calming breath. "Okay. So . . . the sky. It's that pretty blue color of the ocean and your eyes. I wish I could go up there and collect some of that water and bring it down here for the grass. Then I want to take off my shoes and wiggle my toes into the dirt. But I want you to do it with me. Everything's more fun when you're with me. Um . . ." He runs his hand over his arrow, takes another breath, and goes on with: "You're an amazing person to be around, Katara, and I don't know what I'd do if I hadn't met you. You help me focus on what's important. You help me stay hopeful. You've helped me sort through the confusion I've been feeling for a while, and I think I'm starting to see things really clearly now. Like how I feel about learning earthbending even though it's my opposite . . . and how I feel about you. I, uh . . ." He grips his glider staff tightly. "I think that's sixty seconds."
It's the way of the world that it'll go on spinning no matter what's happening in it, whether it's hope or heartbreak or the closest thing to a confession I've heard come from Aang about that thing we still need to discuss: what happened between us in the cave. I link and unlink my fingers. I look ahead at Zuko and catch myself doing it. Thinking about Zuko when I'm back here talking to Aang. Whatever this feeling is, it needs to stop. Now.
I glance back at the airbender, who's looking at me hopefully. "Want me to do another thought-share?"
He grins. "That'd be—"
"You know what stinks? Walking," Sokka suddenly loudly complains from the front, cutting Aang off. "That's all we've been doing for days and days! We need another ride."
"Let's talk tonight," I tell Aang quickly. It's not tough to recognize that we're all about to dissolve into noisy banter.
"Maybe Twinkletoes can drop us all on an air scooter and fly us to the bay," Toph helpfully suggests.
My brother grabs her by the shoulders. "Or maybe we can ride on a wave of rock you keep pushing forward!"
"Or we can borrow some ostrich horses," Zuko says.
"Wow. Now that's a great idea!" my brother says. "Are a bunch of them just going to drop down out of the sky for our convenience?"
Toph points. "He means those."
Far to the right of the road, a fence rings off a wide corner of a grassy field kept green by irrigation—the outer limits of some farm. Two ostrich horses graze on the edge of the enclosure while another stands watch close by. Zuko wanders off the road and the rest of us follow. The self-appointed guard walks over to the fence and leans its neck over, sniffing as we approach. I stare at its eyes, a misty blue.
"That's weird," I say.
"It's blind," Zuko explains. "See those over there? They have normal ostrich eye colors."
"Hey, it's not scared," Aang says, petting the blind one's beak.
"That one can be Toph's since they've got so much in common," Sokka teases, earning him a punch square in the stomach. The earthbender in question then climbs over the wooden fence and drops down on the other side.
"I call riding with Sparky," she says. "He's the only one who looks like he can handle one of these things."
"Katara, would you like to ride with me?" Aang asks shyly.
My brother pokes out a pouty lip. "Aww, man. Odd man out."
When the rest of us follow Toph over the fence, the other two grazing ostrich horses look up. Zuko approaches the one of them with slow steps. It turns its brown eyes on him and backs away until the firebender holds up an open palm. The ostrich horse snorts but leans its head down to smell the hand. It lets Zuko rub its neck.
"You're really good with animals," I tell him, probably the reason Momo liked Zuko's lap and scratches behind the ears.
"My uncle taught me, and these are tamed. They trust people."
"No surprise there. He seems to have taught you everything."
Zuko helps Toph onto the ostrich horse, then climbs up himself in the front. "I haven't ridden bareback very often, but hold on tight and we'll be okay," he assures the earthbender, who wraps her arms tightly around his waist.
"We better be," she tells him, not trying too hard to hide the anxiety in her voice.
He looks at me again. "Not everything. I'm starting to pick up on some new lessons."
The prickle of fire comes into my chest again—but then I hear: "Katara, are you ready?" Aang's already waiting for me on his chosen ostrich horse, the one with blue eyes.
"Do you think it's safe to take this one?" I ask, not sure if a blind animal makes for a good travel companion.
"Don't worry. We'll be okay."
I grab Aang's hand to climb up behind him. "Sokka, hurry up!" I call.
My brother's still circling around his ostrich horse, trying to get it to let him on. The animal shies away, stamping its legs and shaking its large head. Sokka makes a grab for its neck and the ostrich horse flaps its wings, knocking my brother into the dirt.
"Looks like you picked the right one," Toph tells him. "You two have so much in common: featherbrains.
Sokka snorts. "Just watch me tame this beast!"
I know what he's about to do a second before he takes off running, but I've only just opened my mouth to tell him to not be stupid when my brother jumps onto the ostrich horse. He makes a wild grab for its neck and accidentally rips out a few feathers. His legs pin tightly to the animal's side. Probably terrified, certainly caught off guard, it rears and takes off. My brother holds on, shrieking for his life. Our blind ostrich horse quickly runs in pursuit, ignoring my screams and Aang's. The sound of pounding feet from behind lets me know Zuko and Toph are following, but the blind one is the fastest of the three. Like the earthbender, it seems to have found its own way to see—maybe by listening for the panicked one's stamping or feeling vibrations from the earth. And it's probably been on this farm long enough to make a mental map of its surrounding, which helps it navigate.
We've almost caught up to Sokka when we hear a different shout and the thunder of more ostrich horse feet. A rider is speeding towards us, a young woman of about Zuko's age with her hair drawn up into a tight bun. From a distance I see her hand reach into one of a pair of saddlebags and pull out some ropes with weights attached. She whistles loudly, some kind of signal that makes all of the ostrich horses pull up short. The weights and rope come flying at us, one knocking my brother clear off his animal and into a tangled pile on the ground. Zuko kicks away the one coming for him and Toph, while Aang redirects ours with a gust of air.
"Off my land and away from my ostrich horses!" she yells, grabbing two more weights and ropes out of the bags.
"Wait, please!" Zuko says, guiding his animal towards her. "We didn't realize these belonged to someone," he lies.
"Oh, sure. Actually you're just pissed off that I caught you before you could steal them. They cost big money, you know. I should tell some of those Fire Nation soldiers who like to steal things off my farm that they've got competition. I'm sure they'd have no problem dealing with some thieves."
"Hey!" Sokka yells. "Does anyone want to help get these ropes off me? Anyone?"
Zuko ignores him. "We're just travelers who need to reach the Serpent's Pass as fast as possible," he tells the girl. "We'll be glad to pay for these three animals."
I gawk. Unless he's got some secret stash of money that the rest of us haven't seen yet, we're almost dead broke. Before I can ask what exactly he plans to pay with, the girl cuts me off with a gasp.
"The what?" she says. "You guys really aren't from around here, are you?"
"Hello!" my brother shrieks.
"Is there a problem?" Aang asks, leading our mount over, too. The girl looks at him carefully, then at me, then back at him.
"Yeah, the Serpent's Pass is a deadly road. Then again, feel free to go that way. It'll be a faster punishment than having to call over those Fire Nation guys." But her eyes have softened, her mouth almost in a smile. "Hey, wait . . . you look familiar." She points at Aang. "That thing you did with the air—you're not the Avatar, are you?"
"Uh . . ."
"He is," Zuko says, cutting Aang off. "And we're his friends."
"Wow! From all the wanted posters I thought you'd be older and tougher, but you're just a little squirt," she says. "Aang, right?"
"Yep," the airbender says, nodding.
"Jia," she says, half-bowing and tucking the ropes and weights back into the saddlebags. She climbs down off her ostrich horse and kneels by Sokka, cutting his binds with a knife. "I'm about to head back to the farm for lunch. You guys hungry?"
"Starving," my brother says, flashing her a grin.
"That was a quick change of heart," I whisper to Aang.
He shrugs. "People are just more willing to help the Avatar, I guess."
But as Jia climbs back into her saddle, I can't help but notice she's glancing more at Zuko than the airbender. She helps Sokka up onto the back of her own ostrich horse. "This might be safer," she tells him. "You really suck with animals, don't you?"
"Hey!" he says, but she laughs and whistles for the other three animals to follow.
We run at a quick pace, leaping past small herds of grazing ostrich horses. Jia leads us with Zuko close behind. "Do you breed them here?" he asks, nodding at one of the clusters of animals.
"Yep," she says. "Me and my parents."
The gesture is clear. If they have tons of ostrich horses, maybe they won't be too reluctant to part with a few for the Avatar's sake.
The farm is a low, sprawling structure sets out on flat land. A few hybrid pigs cluster around the front yard. We climb off our mounts and Jia waves to a farmhand sitting out on the porch. She whispers something to him before he leads the ostrich horses away. Aang pets a wooly-pig before we climb up the porch steps. A pigster perched on the porch swing cocks its head at us.
"Mom, Dad—guests!" she calls as she leads us into the house. "You guys want baths before lunch?" she asks, looking our dusty clothes up and down.
Toph rolls her eyes. "I'm fine."
"I'm not," I say. "I'd love to get in some water."
"Here, come with me. You got a name?"
"Katara." We shake hands.
She takes me to a small room with a water-filled tub and hands me a towel. "I was going to use this after lunch, but I'll refill it in the evening. It should still be a little warm. Hey—mind if I ask something personal?"
"Uh . . . sure. Go ahead," I say, stripping down to my wrappings in the meantime.
"So, that older boy. The one in Earth Kingdom clothes. You're not his girlfriend, are you?"
I drop my shirt onto the pile of clothes already by the tub. "What? No. No way."
"Oh, okay. That's cool. See you at lunch, and call if you need anything!"
Jia closes the door as she leaves, humming softly. I climb into the water and sink down so the water's almost tickling my nose. I try to focus on the currents I make with my fingers, little swirls in the pool. At least here in my own element, I should feel comforted—but I'm not. I shouldn't let her words bother me, but they hum under my skin like her little tune. Leaning back on my elbows, I slide down until the water seals over my whole face. I want it to wash away this strange grief that touches me deep inside. A sadness I can't explain.
But when I finish my bath, I feel cleaner but not better. And even cleaner is questionable on the grounds that somewhere buried in all that sadness is a dark guilt, a whispering voice that tells me Zuko's my friend and that's it. The whisper that reminds me I like Aang. I tell myself this, over and over: You like Aang.
Waterbending myself dry, I dress and find my way to the kitchen by following a warm scent trail. An older woman who looks very much like Jia, only heavier and a little more worn, is setting out large bowls filled with food. My friends have already settled around the round dinner table, which is full except for three empty chairs.
"Woah! Way too much, Mom," Jia teases the woman, who notices me and waves me into an empty chair next to Aang.
Sokka's eyes leap between dishes. "Do you think we could have some for the road, too?"
"No one's ever left my house hungry," the woman answers, laughing.
"Well, one person tried," Jia says. "But Mom chased him down and brought him back."
"To feed him or fry him?" my brother jokes.
Jia laughs as the woman takes a seat beside me so all the chairs but one are filled. Zuko, who is wedged between Aang and Jia, passes Toph a bowl where she's sitting on Sokka's other side. She spoons out some rice and shoves the bowl at my brother. Momo nibbles some food directly off Aang's plate. Our hosts observe this with a faint wave of nausea passing across their faces.
"Dad's out in the fields," Jia says, explaining the remaining empty chair. "I'll bag him a lunch and take it over after we eat. You guys want to come along? We could use the help harvesting apples."
At the mention of apples, Aang sighs quietly. Or maybe it's just a coincidental overlap.
"We'd love to!" Sokka says, volunteering the whole group with a grin. I think he's already got a new crush.
Toph picks at her food. "Why not," she says, almost sadly.
I scoop large helpings out of a few different bowls. It's not all familiar, but the smells tell me I won't be disappointed. Halfway through the meal, Jia undoes the bun holding up her hair. It pours down her shoulders in dark, generous waves. She glances at Zuko as she does this, although the firebender keeps his eyes on his plate.
"So are any of you guys benders?" she asks.
"Earthbender," Toph immediately volunteers with a pleased grin.
I nod. "Waterbender."
"Avatar," Aang says meekly.
"Boomerang bender," my brother says, whipping out his weapon of choice. "Impressive, ain't it?"
Zuko takes another bite and chews thoughtfully. "Non-bender," he says at last. "I fight with dual dao swords."
"Wow," she says, trying to catch his eyes. "Swords, huh? That's pretty neat. Think you could show me some sword moves later?"
At those words, he looks up and catches me watching them intently. I look hard into my food, my breathing quickened. "Swords aren't something to play around with," he says, the answer clear in his tone.
Jia nudges him with her elbow. "Aww, come on. You guys got a free lunch off us . . . and if you impress me you'll get free dinner, too."
Zuko's eyes close, his jaw set firm. My stomach drops because I already know what he's going to say, this firebender who promised to help us however he could. He would probably do almost anything to fulfill that promise.
"Okay," he says, almost sadly.
"Sweetness," Jia says.
"That's my word," Toph growls.
She laughs rather unkindly. "You can't claim a word."
"Watch me."
"Can someone pass me the rice bowl?" Aang says loudly even though he's closest to it. He glances between the two girls as he says this, probably trying to quell the almost-argument.
"Hey, I've got an idea," Jia says. "Why don't you four"—she points at me, Sokka, Aang, and Toph—"go help my dad in the apple grove. Meanwhile, you can impress me with your sword skills."
Zuko stands up. "I'm going with my friends."
Her eyes flash. "Please?"
"He'll be glad to stay," Sokka says, leaning close to Jia. "I will, too, if you want to see my boomerang in action."
She shoots my brother a withering glare. "Besides," she whispers in Zuko's ear, though loud enough for me to hear. "Don't you need three ostrich horses?"
Zuko bristles, but his shoulders slump. I want to defend him and tell this Jia girl to back off, but before I can say anything he nods. "Okay," he agrees again. "I'll see you guys at dinner."
The remaining four of us are herded outside like moo-sows. Jia's mother gives us directions and tells us to ride two of the ostrich horses that brought us here out to the orchards. "This one's my personal favorite even though he's not very useful," she tells me, patting the blind one's neck. "We can't even use him to sire a new line since the offspring might be blind, too."
"What's his name?" I ask.
"Kan," she says, handing me a wrapped lunch bag for her husband. "Shame he can't see. He's smarter than three of these others put together."
Aang helps me onto Kan's back. Sokka and Toph climb up on the other. My brother takes the front spot and she wraps her arms around his waist. Tighter even than around Zuko's waist earlier, I notice.
The ostrich horses seem to know the road to the orchards by memory. Ladders leading up into trees are filled with workers picking fruit. An older man who introduces himself as Lee takes the bag, thanking us for coming out to help. We spend the next hour picking fruits and dropping them into baskets, though my mind's only halfway on the job. The other half of me is back on the farm wondering if Zuko's okay. If maybe that Jia girl secretly guessed he might have been a firebender by the scar on his face, even though that was a stupid theory. Plenty of regular Earth Kingdom civilians have been burned by those benders. But still I hold on to that theory because that's easier than admitting to the real reason I'm worried. The reason that shouldn't concern me in the slightest at all.
"Hey," Sokka calls from an adjacent ladder. "You don't happen to have any water, do you?"
"Yeah, hold on." I reach for my water skin, but my fingers meet fabric. "Oh, I must have left it back in the farmhouse after my bath. There's probably some water out here—but I have to go back and grab my water skin."
As I climb down the ladder, Toph stands up from her place at the base of a tree. "I'm coming with you," she says, probably tired of being useless. She offered to earthbend-shake the trees so they drop all their apples, but apparently bruised fruit sells poorly on the market. Kan walks over to meet us and pushes his beak into my hand. I feed him an apple I'd torn off on my way down.
"Can you find your way back to the farmhouse?" I ask him after Toph and I are safely situated on his back.
He leaps into a sprint. Toph holds on tightly but stays quiet. "Feeling okay?" I ask her.
"I'm fine." Her tone lets me know the conversation is over even though she's clearly worked up about something.
"You don't have to tell me. I'm just offering you a chance to talk."
My fingers gloss over Kan's feathers, trying to find a steady hold. We really need tack and a saddle once we get back to the farm.
"Your brother's a jerk," she says.
"What'd he do?"
"Did you see him hitting on that girl? You can't just do that to strangers."
"My brother flirts more than he should," I admit. "That doesn't mean he's serious."
Toph thinks about this in silence. "Jerk," she says, then grips my waist a little more tightly.
The farmhouse is coming up in the distance. Kan slows to a jog, then suddenly stops even though we're a good way away. He shakes his head and takes a step back. "What's wrong?" I ask.
"Shh," Toph says. "I can hear someone coming."
There's a dense herd of ostrich horses grazing nearby. I jump down, help Toph off, and guide Kan by the beak into the crowd. The other animals ignore us.
"It's Zuko and Jia," she says, laying her hand on the ground. "They're coming this way."
I hear their voices before I see them. "I will not," the firebender growls angrily. Leaning down, I can just make out their distant feet out through the layer of ostrich horse legs. Toph gets down beside me so we're both listening and watching.
"But you need those three ostrich horses," she says, her voice a low purr.
"What else can I give you?"
"Just that. I have everything else I need. We breed the best ostrich horses and the Earth King himself is one of our customers, making my father one of the richest men in the Earth Kingdom. He only still works because he was raised to like the labor."
There's a pause as Zuko seems to consider this. "He just turned away from her, and his heart rate's really up," Toph tells me. I wish I could see more than just their feet.
"Then let me just pay you for them."
Jia's cold laugh falls across the field. "Pay me? I have all the money I could ever ask for. That's the only way you're getting those animals."
"Fine, then we don't need them," Zuko says. "We'll walk the rest of the way."
Someone sighs, and I'm guessing it's Jia. "I'll give you a sweeter deal," she says. "Instead of killing yourselves on the Serpent's Pass, why don't you go to Full Moon Bay? There's a new ship about to launch on its maiden voyage tomorrow. My friends and I were going to take a trip to Ba-Sing-Se, but I'll give you five tickets for free plus the three ostrich horses. You won't even need passports." A pause, then: "Of course, unless you have tickets and passports. Then please feel free to go—though you're sure you won't stay for dinner?"
"I have a girlfriend."
"She won't know . . . and it's for your friends."
"They're looking at each other," Toph tells me, feeling with her seismic sense.
I suddenly feel it. I feel it way deep down and I know, and know for sure, that he's about to make some stupid sacrifice for the team that he'll regret. I hear him say fine even as I stand. It fills up my ears, it fills up my lungs, it fills me up until I'm brimming with fear as I push through the ostrich horses. I move one aside by its neck and remain clinging to it.
They are standing there together in the bright daylight, pressed together, her arms snagged around his neck. She brushes her lips against his. He squeezes his eyes shut, but he doesn't resist. Then she lunges and turns it into a real and deep kiss.
And from my place among the ostrich horses, I hate my legs for turning to water while I tell myself it doesn't matter, it doesn't, it doesn't—and I hate myself because no matter how many times I say that, no matter how many times I say Zuko's life doesn't matter at all to me in that sphere . . . for some reason I know it does, it does, it does.
A/N: Longest chapter yet, woo! Love it? Hate it? Please hit the "review" button below and tell me (even if you haven't had a chance to leave comments yet but have been following the story)! :D I want to know how I can make it better and what I'm doing well and should keep doing.