Hey guys...so I know that I made some people very angry from the last chapter. (I got the angry reviews) I'm sorry for the people who were upset, this story is loosely based off of the Nicholas Spark's book Dear John, Jason is back in a big way this chapter so I hope that people don't hate me. Let me know what you think?

October 2009

Dear Jason-

I'm sorry that I wasn't more receptive to you when you were in town. I'd love to be able to tell you that it was good to see you and that we should catch up sometimes but I don't know if we are ever going to be able to be those people. We met and fell in love and everything happened so fast that I couldn't remember a time before you were a part of my life, for a while you were my life.

I never meant to fall in love again, I didn't think that I could until I met Coop. I know you didn't come here to Miami to hear about my love life or about my problems. But you were able to reassure me in a moment where I didn't know what I was going to do. And for that I will be forever grateful to you. I'm going to be a mom. And while it's an entirely terrifying feeling I'm excited beyond belief. I hope that one day your life will be safe enough to be able to be a parent. I've seen you with Morgan and how close you were to Michael and how well you take care of people. I hope you get that one day, you deserve to be happy.

While I'm not sure if we could ever be friends if you ever need anything, if you ever get into trouble. I'm only a phone call or a bike ride away. Who knows, maybe you and Coop could be friends too.

Thank you for being my voice of reason and for teaching me to love,

Maxie

April 2011

Jason didn't know what he was doing in this town. His only son, Jake was dead. And he didn't even get the chance to really know him. He had given up any claim or attempt at a relationship with his son to keep him safe only to have him hurt and killed in a hit and run accident. It made no sense. He'd been at his birthday parties as a family friend but his son had never had the chance to call him dad, and now he never would. He wanted to be there for Elizabeth, to be there to mourn his son; but in reality he couldn't. He just had to go. And so once again Jason found himself driving his motorcycle down the coast, by now it was his go to when he was hurting. He really should have known better than to drive down to Florida, he didn't need to see Maxie and her husband and child. He'd kept tabs on her once a year through the last 2 years. Every year on the date of Emily's death instead of thinking about his sister he would look into her life. Or at least the life she put on the internet for the world to see.

Jason saw the opening ML Promotions, after taking over the company from Markem they had agreed to change the company using their initials for their name. Max Barrett and Logan Hayes, but she would always be Maxie Jones to him, whether she was married and taking her husband's name she would always be Maxie.

Jason had just parked his bike and was making his way towards the doors when suddenly a familiar face appeared.

"Can I help you man?" A slightly older Logan stepped up. His hair was buzzed now, but he still looked pissed off every time he saw Jason.

"I was just going to see Maxie—"

"She's out of the office today with her kid; he caught some bug from daycare." Logan explained. "Look Jason," Logan started to speak. "Yeah I remember who you are. It took Maxie a really long time to get over you and with everything with Coop—"

"I get it, you're looking out for your friends," Jason raised his hands in defeat. "I just—just wanted to know that she's okay, the last time I saw her—"

"She's my best friend, and so is Coop."

"I'm not here to cause any trouble."

"Then go, she just got her life back together and there is no reason for you to be here. She doesn't need you coming in and messing with her head again."

Jason was about to turn and walk away but he still didn't know that she was okay. "Is she—"

"Jason, she's not your concern anymore. If Coop was here he'd be the one to tell you this but you have to go!"

"Was?" Jason said picking up on the word change.

"He um, he was killed in the line of duty three months ago. If Maxie didn't have Keegan—"

"Is that her kid's name?"

"Yeah, when she got pregnant, Maxie and Coop were still figuring things out. It took her a really long time to trust that he wasn't going to just up and dump her like that last guy did."

"Look Logan—"

"No, you look. I don't know what you're doing here but you didn't see Maxie when she came back from Port Charles. Okay I was there for her, I made sure she kept eating, and remember to take her medication. Made sure she didn't go home with the wrong guys from the club. You just threw her away and forgot about her and Maxie doesn't need you here. She managed to get over you, and she'll get through this too. But you need to stay the hell away from her. So get back on your bike and get out of here."

Jason couldn't fault Logan for his protectiveness. It's how he was towards Emily's ex's if you mess with one of your own you do everything in your power to keep them away. It was what Logan was doing now. But it still hurt like hell to hear about what Maxie went through then and now. He never wanted her to hurt. That was the last thing he ever wanted to do.

Maxie had just taken Keegan to the pediatrician who basically told Maxie it was a cold. He had spiked a minor fever the morning before and so he wouldn't be allowed back in daycare for another day. Which meant Maxie wouldn't be spending too much time in the office. After finding out she was pregnant she had stressed about the right moment to tell Coop about the baby. After her conversation with Jason that day she drove to the police station to tell him the news but he was out on a call and waiting killed the nerve she had. It took three more days before she blurted out the news one night during dinner. Coop had started to pour her a glass of wine when she quickly told him to stop because she was pregnant. He had almost dropped the bottle out of shock but his surprised face soon turned into a smile followed by laughing and kissing and more on the living room floor.

She was considered a high risk pregnancy because of her transplant so everyone in her life hovered over her nonstop. At work she soon stopped doing night promotions. Now that she was one of the owners she had people to do the dirty work and she just had to supervise. Which in reality made more sense once she started to show, she quickly went from revealing skintight dresses to flowing skirts and Maxie dresses to accommodate her growing belly. Stiletto heels replaced with reasonable wedges, "just because I'm pregnant doesn't mean my feet can't look cute!" She yelled every time she had to get assistance putting on or removing her shoes.

And while Maxie had never planned on motherhood the moment the doctors placed her newborn son into her arms she was through the roof, glowing and knowing that she would do anything in her power to protect this miracle baby. Moments after Coop proposed which Maxie deliriously said yes knowing that Coop loved her and would do everything in his ability to keep her and their beautiful baby boy Keegan Jones Barrett safe.

Coop getting shot was never part of the plan. Logan had been the one to come find her. She was at the park with Keegan when the officers came to the offices. He knew she wasn't going to handle the news well but she almost handled it too well. She put on a brave face at the funeral Keegan sitting in Maxie's lap unsure what all was happening. But Logan had been around to see her cry. He temporarily moved himself into the three bedroom house Coop and Maxie had purchased just before Keegan's birth. With the thought that a backyard was necessary for their baby boy and for the dog and future kids that would follow. Logan stayed for 6 weeks and had only recently moved out.

Things were beginning to return to the new normal.

"Look Mommy vroom!" Keegan ran out of his mother's grasp up to the shiny piece of foreign mechanics.

"Keegan you know better than to run like that." Maxie said catching up. "It's a pretty bike."

"Mommy—." Keegan said as if to admonish her for calling the motorcycle pretty.

"Babe, we can't touch other people's stuff—it's like when you don't like when Cousin Collin plays with your toys." Maxie tried to explain to her young son. He had an uncanny ability to find anything with a motor that would go extremely fast—he was very much like his father that way, although Coop's motorcycle had barely left the garage in the last few years.

"It's okay he can touch it." A voice called out from ahead of them.

"Jason—Its good to see you." Maxie smiled allowing Keegan to slip out of her grasp and touch the bike with Jason's permission. "What are you doing here?"

"You know how you always assume—"

"Oh, I'm sorry Jason. Who?" Maxie asked knowing that someone close to Jason had died.

"Uh, my son." Jason said causing Maxie's face to rise up in shock. Hearing that made her want to wrap her arms around Keegan and never let him go.

"Do you want to go to the park with us?" Maxie asked quickly before she lost her nerve.

"Park, park." Keegan yelled jumping up and down.

"You sure?" Jason asked looking between the mother and son.

"Yeah, it's a bit of a drive out of the city but if you want to come your more than welcome." Maxie smiled taking Keegan's hand in hers and walking across the parking lot, "come on Jason."

After a moment Jason followed across the parking lot toward Maxie's "mom mobile" as she called it. It was still far from a minivan but it was a much more practical vehicle for a woman with a child. Jason moved to get into the Maxie made quick work of getting Keegan buckled into his seat making sure he could reach his sippy cup and the toy that was sitting in the opposite cup holder.

"Do you want to drive?" Maxie asked extending the keys to him. Jason glad excepted them loving the distraction from thinking about himself for a while.

They drove in comfortable silence as Maxie gave directions when necessary, and they soon found themselves at a quiet park in the next city over. Maxie unloaded Keegan's toys which Jason quickly picked up and Maxie got her squirming son out of his seat knowing full well not to put him down until he was on the woodchips. The minute she set him down he moved as quickly as his short legs would allow towards the sandbox.

Maxie and Jason followed and Jason sat the toys down next to the boy who quickly started to dig through the toys until he found his shovel. Maxie gestured to the bench a few feet away and the duo moved to sit well within sight and hearing distance of the little boy.

"So, you had a son?" Maxie asked after a while.

"Um, kind of. I mean biologically he was mine, but I didn't raise him." Jason tried to explain without detail. "How old is Keegan?"

"He's um, he'll be two next month." Maxie smiled, her fingers absently playing with the rings on her wedding finger. "Jason um Coop he—"

"I know," Jason said not wanting her to have to say it. "about Coop. I ran into Logan earlier and he filled me in and then asked me to stay away from you."

Laughing to herself, "That's Logan alright, always trying to protect me."

"I'm really sorry."

Placing her hand on top of his in a simple gesture that spoke, 'I'm sorry too.'

Keegan came running over to the bench holding a sea shell in his hand which he quickly gave to Maxie, she bent down and almost as if it was a trained response he wrapped his arms around her neck and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek before running back to the sandbox.

"Coop taught him that. Every time you bring a girl a gift you need to give her something sweet too, he would say. He was from Texas which I guess explains a lot."

"He's going to give you a run for your money later." Jason laughed, the little boy looked nothing like Jake. Where Jake's hair was blonde and spiked, Keegan had a messy mop of brown curls. "Uh, I shouldn't have come here."

Jason moved to stand, causing Keegan to notice something wrong. "Are we leaving?" The little boy asked tugging on Jason's pant leg. Keegan lifted his arm up expecting Jason to lift him. "What's your name?"

"Jason."

"Why are you so sad Jason?" He asked framing his face in his tiny hands.

"I lost somebody." Jason said simply.

"Like my daddy?"

"Yeah sweetie, like daddy." Maxie answered for Jason, his face still squished between tiny palms.

"Mommy said it's okay to be sad."

"That's right buddy."

Keegan wiggled willing to be put down which Jason quickly did. Keegan just changed his tactic and grabbed his hand leading him over towards the sandbox. He quickly put Jason to work filling his bucket was sand so he could attempt to build a castle with the sand bucket mold.

Maxie sat watching them play for a while before her phone started to ring. "Hey Logan, yes I know. I'm currently sitting at the park watching him play with Keegan." She said listening to his rant about Jason, it wasn't anything she hadn't heard before. "Logan, I appreciate your concern but I'm not that girl anymore. Jason just lost someone close to him, he just needs a break and I don't mind him being here, Coop wouldn't have minded either."

Looking up from her shoes Maxie say Jason carrying a crying Keegan back over towards the bench, quickly ending the phone call Maxie rushed over to them taking her son out of Jason's arms trying to find the cause of his sudden wailing.

"He fell, he's fine just scared himself."

Jason handed over Keegan and watched Maxie goes into Mom mode. Gently rocking him with him pulled into her chest easily calming him down in a matter of seconds. "What do you think baby, should we go home and get some lunch?" The little boy nodded into his mother's chest slipping his tiny thumb into his mouth.

"I'll gather all the stuff if you want to go put him in the car." Jason suggested already moving back towards the park while Maxie moved to put the almost asleep boy in the car. She knew it was going to be a struggle to get him to stay awake for the car ride home but they didn't have anywhere to be.

"Are you staying at the hotel again?" Maxie asked once they were on the way back towards his bike.

"I haven't checked in yet." Jason said making a few more turns back into the city.

Maxie turned back to check on Keegan who was now knocked out in his car seat, head tilted to the side a small dap of drool rolling down his chin. "Do you want to stay with us?" Maxie said rushed out. "I mean, at our house. We have a guest room, and we didn't really get to talk today."

"You don't have to do that Maxie—"

"I really don't mind, Jason. Honestly we can catch up and you can maybe, just maybe get a tan." She joked trying to put him at ease. In reality it would be Logan she'd have to put at ease once he found out about this.

"Well Keegan is asleep now," Maxie smiled later that evening. After the park they stopped to pick up Jason's motorcycle before he followed Maxie back to the house. She quickly called and warned Logan about her house guest so when he did his random house check he didn't flip out. While attempting to get Keegan out of the car he woke up demanding lunch. Thankfully Jason was able to keep him occupied by letting Keegan show him all of the toys in his room and play room. Between lunch and Dinner Jason took a nap while Maxie got Keegan set up with a Jake and the Neverland Pirates episode while Maxie attempted to get some work done.

She found herself distracted by the pictures surrounding her desk, of Keegan, her and Coop, and Georgie. On her computer though she had a file saved from years before. It was inside a folder marked "old accounts" inside were pictures of her time with Jason. In South Beach, in Port Charles, pictures of them as a happy long distance functioning couple. She had tried to delete the pictures the day after Coop had moved in. She hadn't looked at them since their first date, the day she moved them to this hidden folder. She was right when she told Logan that she would never have closure when it came to Jason Morgan, because while she had loved Cooper Barrett, there was always a part of her heart that belonged to Jason.

It wasn't until after Maxie put Keegan down for the night that Maxie had to face the reality a uninterrupted conversation with Jason.

"He sleeps through the night?" Jason asked from the couch.

"Yeah, he's a really good sleeper." Maxie smiled sitting on the opposite side of the couch from him. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," Jason nodded waiting for her to speak again.

"Your son's mother, was it the woman you went to rescue? When I came to town after Michael's accident, I found you on the roof with a nurse, that's her right?"

"How'd you know?" Jason asked confirming her suspicions.

"Just a vibe I got from her. She was always around and it just didn't feel like things were finished between the two of you."

"It's not that, we've been done for years. She was my sister's best friend and she and I—"

"You don't owe me an explanation." Maxie smiled already knowing that she didn't want to hear about Jason's love life. She didn't really want to tell him about Coop either. "Tell me about your son."

"His name was Jake. He was almost 4 years old. I um…I really didn't know too much about him,."

"He lived with his mother?"

"Yeah, Elizabeth the nurse, he has a stepfather too named Lucky, he agreed to raise him as his own and keep his paternity secret. Um, he has a older half-brother Cameron, and a younger half-brother Aiden."

"That's a lot of halves? Is everyone in your town related in some way?" Maxie smiled trying to lighten the heavy mood in the room, she knew Jason was running out of things to say.

"He, um…he was hit by a car while playing in his front yard." Jason said embarrassed that his couldn't answer the basic questions. "I wasn't really there for a lot of stuff, ."

"Because of your job?" Maxie asked bitterly, she didn't mean for it to come off that way but like she had told Logan all those years before, there was no closure.

"Um, I did it to keep him safe, after everything that happened with Michael—"

"Jason I've heard the speech before." She bit back. "I'm sorry, uh I guess I'm not over it." Getting up from the couch and moving into the kitchen to pour herself a glass of wine.

"I'm sorry, for how I—" Jason started following her.

"Can I be honest with you, like brutally honest for a second?" Maxie asked after taking a large sip of wine. When Jason didn't refuse Maxie continued. "You do all these things for the good and the safety of others, but what good does that noble act actually get you? I mean be real Jason, Michael gets shot while walking through a warehouse with his dad, Emily gets killed by some physco and you blame yourself. Jake gets hit by a car in a random accident that again has nothing to do with you. You have all these rules and you've built all these walls to keep the people closest to you safe yet life is still going on and sometimes shit happens. I mean Cooper get shot and killed during a typical traffic stop. Bad things happen in this world and your job or you pushing people away isn't changing that fact." Stopping to take a breath Maxie could tell that Jason was significantly uncomfortable with all the information Maxie had just spat out at him. "For goodness sake Jason you broke up with me through a voicemail message!"

Through Maxie's tirade she got closer and closer to Jason until she finally had it enough and pushed him out of the kitchen. Maxie wasn't violent but her words didn't seem to be enough. Jason just stood there and took it, her hits not causing any real damage. When it seemed that she was beginning to wear herself out Jason just grabbed her arms holding her against his body.

"I loved you."

"I loved you too." Jason smiled looking down at the woman in his arms. Hell if he was being honest with himself there was a part of him that still loved Maxie, even after all this time.

As if out of muscle memory, Maxie's arms slowly moved up Jason's muscled arms, his moving down to hold her waist, and the second their eyes connected the distance between the two evaporated. Lips on lips, hands moving fast into Maxie's hair anchoring there mouth's together in a kiss that could only remind her of their past together, and it wasn't a bad feeling.

Lifting Maxie unto the counter top Maxie opened the space between her legs pulling Jason in. She had just wrapped her legs around his back when a sudden wailing came from down the hallway in Keegan's room.

Head's snapping up as if awaken from a dream Maxie quickly pushed Jason back, hopping off the counter and disappearing down the hallway into her son's room. A few minutes later when Maxie walked back out with the whimpering toddler snuggled into her chest, the kitchen was empty and Jason was gone.

Am I forgiven yet?