While it had obscenely good funding, the high school Ranma attended was widely considered one of the worst schools in the city. This was due to a wide variety of factors, but it all boiled down to the fact that it had some of the worst discipline problems period. It lacked the vicious gang violence that plagued the normal schools, but it more than made up for it with the random acts of property damage and total disrespect that the teachers got. Attendance was also widely noted to be horrid, and the only thing that made the school any good was it's top notch sports teams.
All of these problems came about because the area around it was a haven for a wide variety of martial arts schools who were both eccentric and highly skilled. Most students knew at least one style of martial arts, and there were several that would be considered skilled in any other place. The entire school was a place where the conventional schooling was a facade, and the real learning was outside of it.
By contrast Nanoha's school was the top funded school in the city. It had the best teachers, and graduation from the school almost guaranteed the students choice of colleges. This was a fairly big deal in Japan. Nanoha's school actually had a waiting list obscenely long. The school had no records of violence, and it's students uniformly had the best average scores in the city. In short, if there had been a perfect high school this would be it. Even the girls that attended the school were said to be top notched, called 'princesses' by other students.
Nanoha would have traded it all to in a heartbeat if she hadn't had family living nearby. The high school was safe, boring, and while warm and friendly, it somehow lacked the adrenaline that Ranma added just by being there. Fate had made the school tolerable, and sometimes even fun, but the blonde had decided to transfer to Ranma school. To be honest Nanoha didn't blame the girl, Ranma had a bad tendency to get into something problematic, and lacked the diplomacy to actually get himself out of it.
It still left Nanoha with Suzuka, Alisa, and Hayate. They were outstanding friends, and Hayate was especially dear to her, but they weren't Ranma and Fate. It wasn't so bad in school, but the other girls had their own lives, and they didn't always catch the cues when Nanoha was overworking herself. It had taken awhile for Nanoha to admit that to herself, that she needed to be watched, that she had a self destructive work ethic.
So Nanoha went to school, and visited Ranma and Fate regularly. It made them happy, and it prevented Nanoha from burying herself in work. It also strained her relationship with the rest of the class. Alisa, Suzuka, and Hayate knew the reasons and approved, but the rest of the class' opinion of her and Fate hadn't been helped by the fact that Fate had transferred to Ranma's school.
"So I hear that Fate destroyed half the school again." The rumor made Nanoha's hand clench a bit on the pencil. "Really, I didn't think she was such a delinquent. I suppose that's why she was such friends with the hellion."
The brown haired girl took a deep breath, and looked forward at the teacher. It wasn't worth getting in trouble for it. Class was almost done anyway.
"Tch, I hear she's already leading half the boys on in the school." Was the quiet response. "I didn't think she was like that when she was here, shows what I know."
That made Nanoha's pencil creek as she gripped it. She grit her teeth and restrained the dark impulse to blast the idiots that were whispering.
"Excuse me!" Alisa's voice rang out loud and obnoxious. "I am TRYING to pay attention to class."
The teacher's gaze snapped back to where the voice had came from. "No yelling in class." He looked from Alisa to the two rumor mongers. "And don't think I didn't hear your whispering too."
Nanoha flashed a grateful smile at Alisa and put her attention back on the school work, and simulating combat with Raging Heart. The rest of the class passed without incident, and the bell rang soon afterward. Today had been a half day, so most of the students rushed out to get to their own life. Nanoha and her friends hung back to talk.
"Thank you." Nanoha finally said as she looked out the large windows that dominated the classroom. "I was that close from blasting them, secrecy be damned."
"I was that close from smacking them myself." Alisa sniffed in disdain. "Dear Fate transfers to be with Ranma, and the rest of the school starts smearing her good name."
"I think.." Suzuka twiddled her fingers as she looked at the other girls. "That I would have done it as well."
"Well I think that's something we can agree on." Hayate giggled as she shouldered her bag. "Actually, now that I think about it, why don't we visit the two. Nanoha has been hogging their time to herself."
"Well, not everyone can fly there." Nanoha smirked at the other girls. "Or in Hayate's case not everyone can stop mothering her family."
Hayate sniffed in mock disdain. "I will have you know that my knights are perfectly able to take care of themselves. Though I do make sure that Shamal is never allowed near the kitchen."
"Isn't Vita going out and clubbing every night?" Nanoha wondered out loud. "I mean, ever since she got that necklace she's been abusing her adult form all over the place."
Hayate looked off into the distance with a slightly demented grin on her face. "I don't mind that, she's absolutely stunning as an adult."
"Hayate is so pervy." Suzuka giggled as the four teenagers began to walk out of the school and to a local train. "Almost as bad as Nanoha."
The brown-haired mage looked slightly incredulous. "I mean really, I'm offended, I have taste! Compared to Nanoha I am an absolute paragon of virtue!"
"How many people have you groped?" Nanoha teased with a smirk as she paid for their tickets. "I'm sure you have a list somewhere on you."
"That reminds me, I need to test out Ranma's female form's body a bit." Hayate wondered out loud. "I hear he's stacked in that form."
"That has to be the strangest phrase I have ever heard." Aliza commented as Suzuka blushed from the blatant innuendo.
"Yep, they are all soft and perky." Nanoha giggled as Hayate zone out. Then in a softer voice. "It's always amusing watching Hayate get like that." She said as an aside to the two other girls.
"Wait, how would you know that?" Hayate blinked a few times. "I thought Ranma has Nayru keep him from changing all the time now."
"He carried me in his shirt a lot when we were in our alt forms." Nanoha shrugged. "Once you get past the jiggling it's actually pretty comfortable."
Hayate blinked and zoned out again even longer this time, her eyes becoming vacant and glassy as she processed the information.
"You know... She wouldn't nearly be as bad as this if you didn't provoke her." Suzuka pointed out timidly.
"Oh, where is the fun in that?" Nanoha grinned widely as Hayate snapped back into attention.
The train pulled up and all four girls got on, sitting primly on one of the empty benches. The ride to Nerima was a bit long, so they had plenty of time to talk while the train started to move. The subjects were a bit more tame after that, but not by much.
Nanoha had managed to make Hayate zone out once more before they finally hit the end of the ride, it was a bit of a disappointment to her actually. She had tried, she really had, but somehow the conversation had slipped away from her and gone from on her friends to actually on her.
"So what did you and Signum do last week?" Hayate asked curiously as she and the others got to their feet. "I never really got around to asking her, she was so red when she got back."
"Uhm.." Nanoha pursed her lips and tried to identify what her friend was talking about. "Oh! That's when we went to one of those famous wrestling events. It was the one with the cages, and somehow one of the contestants sneaked a barrel of cooking oil into the match. There was oil everywhere."
"Umm..." Suzuka blinked a few times as she tried to picture the event. The only thing that came to her mind made her blush heavily.
Alisa blinked a few times. "What in the..?"
"It was one of the fights nearby Nerima." Nanoha explained quickly. "They tend to get really weird really fast." The girl flushed a bit at the thought. "I wasn't complaining, since it was a half dozen men trying to wrestle with oil flying everywhere."
Hayate opened and closed her mouth a few times. "It's not really my thing... But now I wish I had gone anyway."
"Oh, there were a few women too." Nanoha added quickly. "They actually kept back and cheered at the other wrestlers though."
Suzuka blushed heavily at the imagery and hid her face while Alisa just groaned and slapped her hand to her head. "I swear Nanoha you are a bad influence."
All of the girls giggled as they walked out of the train station and into Nerima proper. Nanoha took the lead from then, taking a path through the convoluted streets that very quickly lost the other girls. As they walked they couldn't help but note the signs of wrecked areas and the numerous signs of various stores and dojos. The entire area was like a giant tourist trap in some points, and in others it was like the world had not progressed into the modern ages.
"This place is... Strange." Suzuka finally noted.
Nanoha shrugged as she passed a sign that stated 'Martial Arts Tea Ceremony.' "To be honest I think it fits Ranma and his father pretty well."
An outraged scream of rage came from another alleyway and all four girls winced. What sounded like a horde of people running began to reverberate across the area.
"I'm getting flashbacks to grade school." Alisa took a nervous step back.
"You mean when Ranma got everyone to chase him?" Suzuka looked around rapidly.
Alisa nodded as Hayate just looked at the two with an incredulous expression. "I thought you were making that up."
"Oh no, it does sound a lot like that time." Nanoha replied nonchalantly. "I think we should get out of the street now." The brown-haired girl began to herd her friends into a nearby store. The action sadly came too late.
"What a haul! What a haul!" A little old man with a massive bag of underwear skipped out in front of all the girls. He was tiny, wrinkled and old, dressed in a ninja outfit and with a pair of panties covering his face.
"Is that..." Suzuka blushed beet red as she turned to look at what was in the bag.
"Why hello sweet things!" The old man jumped right in front of all four girls, who took a step back. "What are such pretty ladies doing in a place like this?" The old man grinned lecherously.
"Just visiting a friend sir." Nanoha smiled warmly down at the man, ignoring how her friends backed up. "I do think that you have bigger issues than us though. That horde sounds like it's catching up."
The old man looked behind him with a raised eyebrow and then turned back the Nanoha. "You are a sharp one." He took a hop back and leapt from the ground onto his sack. "What's your name girl?" He asked, lighting up his pipe and ignoring the gradually strengthening sound of the horde.
"Nanoha Takamachi." The girl in question inclined her head.
"Pleased to meet you Nanoha!" The old man chuckled and glanced back quickly. "You can call me Happosai. If you can catch me later I would love to talk with a pretty thing like you!" With that the man jumped off his sack, grabbing onto it and dashing up the the girls. "Later sweet things!" He jumped past them and their clothing ruffled.
"That was..." Suzuka rubbed at her clothing a moment in confusion. "What the..."
"Huh?" Alisa pulled open her shirt and looked down.
"Well I'll be." Nanoha looked down at her body for a moment and then rubbed her legs together to confirm something. "I didn't even see him move."
"He took our underwear." Hayate stated flatly. "All of our underwear."
"Looks like it!" Nanoha chirped as she looked down her shirt as well.
"He... HE..." Suzuka went beat red.
Alisa took a step back and Nanoha blinked as the normally timid girl trembled. With a deep shuddering breath the girl took a few stumbling steps and then righted herself as she walked to a nearby street lamp. She gripped the lamppost as if supporting herself for a moment and then looked at the mob still chasing after the old man.
"GRAHHHH!" The purple haired girl roared and ripped the pole out of the street. "LET ME AT HIM!" She then began to sprint after the crowd.
"Nanoha," Hayate said quietly as Alisa gaped at the hole in the street. "Isn't she supposed to be the normal one?"
"Yep!" Nanoha chirped again as she made sure her skirt stayed down.
Alisa just sighed and hung her head. "Nanoha."
"Huh?" The girl turned to the blonde with a curious expression.
THWACK.
"Ieee!" Nanoha teared up as she clutched her head and Alisa growled.
"Stop being so amused!" The girl demanded.
"But it's funnnny!" The girl whined.
Hayate sighed at her friends as she looked at the running mob. "As funny as it is, someone should follow Suzuka, she doesn't know the area."
"I can do it easy." Nanoha waved and manifested Raging Heart, twirling the staff casually around and getting ready to make a magically assisted jump.
"Wait!" Alisa tackled the brown-haired girl before she could jump. "Change into something else first! You will flash the entire neighborhood if you do that."
"Oh.." Nanoha blushed slightly and looked down at her skirt, the standard school uniform for her school. "Yeah, that might be a good thing."
With a gestures her clothing shifted into pink free-flowing energy. Then in a flash she was dressed in her battle uniform, white and pristine. Looking down at her uniform Nanoha took the time to be sure that all her clothing was in the proper place, and then she leapt to a rooftop in a low key magical jump.
Hayate blinked a few times as she watched Nanoha. "You know, I think you shouldn't have warned her. I wouldn't have minded a free show."
Alisa just groaned and rubbed at her forehead. "You two are irredeemable perverts."
"True, true." Hayate nodded seriously. "Lets go to that dojo that Nanoha told us about instead of waiting here. I have directions stored in my device, so I can find it easy."
On the rooftops Nanoha leapt from building to building. She could easily fly to where the mob was, but she wanted to be low key instead of blazing through the air. Fortunately the mob was very easy to spot as it traveled across the neighborhood. Unfortunately, just as Nanoha managed to catch up to where the mob was, a wave of magic flowed over her, and the world went gray.
Recognizing a barrier being setup, Nanoha stopped where she was and looked around quickly. A spell this style was usually cast for only very specific reasons, so she should be able to spot the mage that cast it quickly. A massive blast of yellow light a block away quickly told who had cast the spell.
'Fate?' Nanoha sent mentally.
The response came quickly, and more succinctly than usual. 'One moment Nanoha. I'm dealing with an... Irritant.'
Nanoha jumped into the air and blasted fulls peed to where the blast had came from, and spotted Happosai cackling madly in front of Fate, who was clad in her barrier jacket, and looked remarkably irritated for her. 'Huh, he got your panties too.'
The old man was waving the item in question around, closer inspection revealed that he had Fate's bra on top his head as well. The bag of underwear was nearby and on the ground at least. "Wow, nice firepower toots!" The old man laughed and twirled the underwear around. "The lightning affinity really matches the look, if you know what I mean."
"Die." Fate responded, as angry as Nanoha had seen her in a long time. The girl shifted her position and Bardiche clicked and hissed as it shifted into a scythe. Her form blurred and sped towards Happosai impossibly fast.
"Yeow!" The old man hopped around as the girl blurred past him. "Ow, ow! How could you abuse a poor old man so?" He looked remarkably dirty from the attack, but almost unscathed.
"Ow." Nanoha touched down next to the old man with a small smile on her face. "You really got dear Fate mad didn't you?"
"Nanoha!" Happosai hopped at the girl and clung to her breasts, nuzzling his face into the cloth. "I adore the new look. Nice bra and panty combo as well."
The girls eyebrow twitched at the man nuzzled at her. "Ok, that's enough of that. Off or I let Fate murder you."
"Yes ma'am!" The old man hopped off, two suspicious items in his gi.
"I'll let that go again." Nanoha grit out and then smiled at the old man. "I'll even help you in exchange for one thing."
"Oh?" Happosai tucked her underwear into his gi. "What would that be?"
"Ahem." The girl knelt down and whispered into the old man's ear.
A few feet off Fate frowned at the two. She had meant to continue her attack, but then Nanoha had dropped in and into the line of fire. That the two were conferring even after the man had groped her made the hairs on the back of Fate's head stand up. It was when the two shook hands that Fate and the blonde saw her bra and panties get passed to the brown-haired girl that Fate finally figured out what had been causing the feeling of dread.
"Deal!" Nanoha tucked the two items into her barrier jacket and casually rested Raging Heart behind her back, placing herself in between Fate and Happosai.
Fate's eyebrow twitched. "You didn't."
"Yep! Your underwear in exchange for my protection!" Nanoha chirped cheerily.
Fate sighed and got Bardiche into a ready stance. "I am going to hurt you now Nanoha."
"Nyhaha." The white clad girl gave out a small laugh, clearly enjoying Fate's discomfort.
Fate shot forward and her device impacted on Nanoha's magical, the girl still casually standing with Raging Heart behind her back. With a grunt of effort Fate pushed forward, and the barrier shattered. With a twirl Nanoha managed to get Raging Heart in the way of the blow, and magical power sparked across the field.
Off to the side, Happosai frowned and looked from his bag of ill-gotten gains and back to the fight, clearly debating something. Finally he stopped, hopped onto his bag and pulled out his pipe to sit back and watch. For a moment that seemed all he was going to do, but at this first sign of the fight getting flashy he pulled out two small pom-poms and then began to cheer.
"Go Nanoha, Go Nanoha!" He cheered and began to wave the two items around.
"Oh look, I have a fan." Nanoha grit out as she blurred back and Raging Heart shifted into firing mode.
Fate blurred out of the way and behind Nanoha, shattering the small binding spell that Nanoha had placed behind her to trap the girl. "Lucky you." She spoke softly as she swept Bardiche in an arc towards Nanoha.
The girl bent forward, and in a page out of Ranma's book actually rolled on the ground, shifting so that her still charging device was pointed point blank at Fate. "I know, aren't I?" The device let loose a short blast of pinky light. Knowing that wasn't enough, the girl stepped back, lifting into the air a few feet and starting to swirl several dozen small balls of pink power around herself.
"Tch." Fate growled out as she dropped the shield that had stopped the blast and swept Bardiche back. The device clicked and shifted around and then hummed as it became a massive zweihander. "I'll be ending a bit of your luck today."
Nanoha just laughed and let loose her barrage of magic, sending the dozens of small lights at Fate, who dodged them nimbly. The girl twisted and turned, and in a few cases slapped the shots out of the air, ignoring how they exploded with terrifying force. Finally she was in front of Nanoha, who had been flying back and into the air. With a grunt he girl heaved the sword around her body and slammed it into Nanoha. The brown-haired girl blocked, but was forced down onto the ground again, cratering it as her feet impacted.
"Hold up, Time out!" Happosai yelled, and both girls stopped incredulously. "If you girls are going to fight dammit, do it properly." The old man grumbled as he set down his pom-poms and walked up to where the two blinked at the old man with complete confusion.
"First, Nanoha." The old man lectured. "Your block was technically good, but if you are in the air like that, and don't have leverage over the opponent, don't try to block, go with it and flow around. And that barrage you used was flashy, but if you know your opponent is that fast, just let them come to you and surround."
"Umm." Nanoha found herself nodding haplessly.
"And you!" Happosai pointed to Fate. "Who taught you how to use that bludgeon you call a sword? Your hips were moving all wrong! A blade that big is all about mass, if you want speed use something smaller. The way you were twisting you were losing almost HALF your power! I am ashamed to watch it."
"Urk." Fate took a step back.
"Now you two are flashy, but if I see such atrocious styles again I will really be annoyed. Kids these days." The old man muttered as he walked back to his bag, picking up the pom-poms again. "Now ahem. Go Nanoha! Go Nanoha!" He began to wave the two objects yet again as he cheered.
Both girls just looked at each other with looks of complete confusion. Finally they seemed to shake it off, and Fate took a few steps back. "That kind of killed the mood."
"I know." Nanoha sighed and brought up Raging Heart. "Want to settle this the old fashioned way?"
"Why not?" Fate shrugged and brought up Bardiche and the weapon shifted into it's firing mode.
Both girls concentrated, and a massive amount of power began to coalesce between them. Then like two flashlights coming on two massive beams of light washed across the field and towards each other. The two impacted in a titanic clash, and half the field that they had been fighting in was destroyed from the massive backwash of power.
Off to the side Happosai let out an whistle of appreciation. Just as quickly as the explosion started, it cut off. The pink light washed across the field and hit Fate with titanic force. The girl however, came out singed slightly and unharmed.
"Ow." Fate gave a quiet groan. "You still have more punch than me."
"Eh, you are still far faster than me." Nanoha shrugged as she walked over to where Fate was. "I win though."
Fate shrugged and placed her shoulder over Nanoha to support herself. "I'm not mad anymore. You will however be returning my underwear after you wash them."
"Awwww." Nanoha whined.
Happosai chuckled and puffed on his pipe as the barrier went down. Then he blinked a few times as he noted that there were quite a few angry women around him. One of them was holding a lamppost. "Ahh.. Hello ladies."
"Kay, we have all the dishes out, and both our pops out of the house." Ranma's mouth twitched slightly. "Still don't know why we are going to all tha trouble to setup this Kasumi."
"Silly Ranma." The older girl scolded slightly as she bent over and looked in the oven before smiling. "Having your friends go to all the trouble of coming here without properly welcoming them feels wrong to my sensibilities."
"I suppose..." Ranma shrugged. "They're more Nanoha's friends honestly."
"Considering they knew you when you were both children, I think you can count them as friends too." Kasumi took out the dish and placed it on the oven to cool. "Besides, poor Nanoha had such a poor time last she visited, I don't want her to think we are ungracious hosts."
Ranma's mouth twitched. "Ha. Alrighty then. I'll tell you when they get here, Nanoha's a bit far off still."
The bell at the door made Ranma frown. "Or I thought they were."
"Go check, Akane and Nabiki are still in their rooms and probably didn't hear that." Kasumi shooed Ranma away and went back to the dish she had pulled out of the oven.
Ranma rolled his eyes and walked out of the kitchen and to the area where the bell had sounded. The Tendo house was a large area comparatively, two stories with a dojo and a carefully maintained yard. It wasn't high class, but it was above the normal. It also didn't compare one whit to Alisa and Suzuka's homes, but that mattered little to Ranma. What did matter to him was the fact that the area was surrounded by a fairly stout fence that made it hard for people to drop in unannounced.
Upon opening the gate Ranma blinked a few times. "What the hell happened to you?"
Alisa and Hayate smiled weakly at the boy. Their usual neat appearance was messed, and both girls were sporting small blushes. Hayate was the first to speak up as she attempted to comb her hair back into place. "It's a bit windy... And we had a rather embarrassing incident with a local."
"Huh?" Ranma looked with a clueless expression at the slightly cloudy sky. "I don't get it."
"There is a pervert out there who can take panties and bras off a girl by just passing them." Alisa grit out bluntly. "We almost flashed half the neighborhood getting here."
"Erk..." Ranma blushed brightly and stepped aside. "Go ahead."
"Thank you." Alisa replied and walked inside stiffly. Ranma noted that she was clutching at her skirt rather tightly.
Hayate paused as she walked in and then smiled. "Nanoha and Fate got them back though. They just sent me a message that they will be here soon."
"That's..." Ranma paused for a moment. "Wait, he got those two as well?"
"Nanoha found it funny." Alisa called back from inside the house.
"She would." The boy muttered as he rubbed at his forehead. "Well feel free to have a seat, Kasumi wanted to prepare a treat for you all, and went full out."
"Really?" Hayate skipped into the house. "It will be nice not to have to eat my own cooking for once."
Ranma waved as the brown-haired girl left and looked up into the sky with a small frown. "The two must be flying here with Suzuka."
The martial artist shrugged and leaned against the fence of the compound and waited a moment. He did hear Kasumi greet the two guests, but couldn't make out the conversation that followed. Most of his concentration was on Nanoha and Fate's travel.
Finally he perked up and smiled as the two dropped out of the sky, Suzuka held between them. The dirty appearance made him blink a few times though. Both Nanoha and Fate looked as if they had just fought a few rounds.
"Did that pervert put up that much of a fight?" Ranma asked with a frown.
"Yes, she did." Fate pointed towards a smirking Nanoha.
Ranma sighed and rubbed at his forehead. "Please tell me that Nanoha wasn't stealing panties."
"I traded them!" Nanoha chirped and giggled as Suzuka glared at her. "Ok, ok, I gave them back, but that old man was amusing, and durable."
"Huh?" Ranma blinked as Suzuka went beet red and ran into the house.
"Suzuka planted a lamppost on his head, and when we left he was shaking it off." Fate offered calmly.
"Ah." The boy nodded and waved the two into the house. "I see she's still as strong as she always has been."
Once the initial awkwardness of the underwear thief had worn off the girls had found themselves enchanted by Kasumi's food, and the conversation was put on hold while they enjoyed themselves on some of the better dishes. Akane and Nabiki had joined up soon after Nanoha and Fate had arrived, so Ranma was a bit outnumbered by the girls of the group. So rapidly the conversation had turned to him.
"He was so adorable when he was tiny!" Nanoha gushed with a mocking smile. "I mean sure he was always dirty, but he always had to act like the little knight in shining armor."
Fate's mouth twitched as Ranma groaned and slammed his head onto the table, just missing his food. "Please, just kill me now and get it over with."
"I seem to remember him being the tiny imp myself." Alisa stated primly, with a small smile. "Didn't he have the teachers praying daily to the local shrine?"
"He did." Suzuka nodded. "The teachers threw a party when he left too, I heard my mother talking about it."
"Rotten little," Ranma muttered as he looked up. "I shoulda spiked their coffee with something before I left."
"To be fair you did manage to get the entire school chasing after you at one point." Fate pointed out calmly.
Nanoha giggled. "That was amusing, seeing him on top of the tool shed and taunting everyone."
"Really Saotome, do you practice that or does it come naturally." Nabiki asked with a slightly sarcastic edge. "I mean you're like a genius at pissing people off."
"Nabiki." Akane chided softly. "I'm sure that Ranma didn't piss off everyone he met."
"Doesn't Arf still want to pound him flat?" Nanoha asked Fate curiously.
"Um." Fate thought a moment. "I think she's given up on it lately, but for awhile she did."
"I know Vita still does." Hayate giggled as she spoke up. "She always comes home grumbling about that rotten Saotome whenever they spar."
"Tch, she's just mad that I can kick her ass nine times out of ten." The boy in question muttered.
Hayate laughed out loud and then smiled. "I know you have Signum wrapped around your finger though. She has your sparring dates marked on the calender and everything."
"Gah!" Ranma twitched out as the rest of the girls giggled. "We have to plan them out like that! When I fight her we end up needing a week to recover each!"
"A week, with the way you heal?" Akane asked curiously.
"Sounds more like an romantic rendezvous than a fight." Nabiki chimed in with a smirk.
"I know, doesn't it? Signum always comes back with the most satisfied expression on her face." Hayate replied with a cat-like smile.
Nanoha gave a fake gasp and hugged at Ranma with teary eyes. "You are cheating on me with Signum? But, but what about our kinky threesome with Fate?"
Kasumi, who had been quiet until that time sputtered up some of the tea she had been drinking and blushed. "Oh!"
The girls more familiar with Nanoha just rolled their eyes. Suzuka handed Kasumi and napkin while Alisa sighed at Nanoha and offered an explanation to the Tendos. "Nanoha's a rather, large, pervert. This is the girl who found a porno based on them and then showed it to all of her friends."
"Yeah, I'm still a bit annoyed at that actually." Ranma pointed out as he pried off Nanoha.
"You three are really that famous?" Akane tried to wrap her mind around the fact that the three of them were that well known.
"The organization we are part of has very few mages of our level. It doesn't help that Nanoha and Fate are some of the most attractive women in their positions." Hayate explained.
Fate nodded in agreement and then added."Ranma's not really part of the TSAB, but he's known as our associates, as well as a powerful fighter in his own right."
"So, like any famous people, you get parodies made of you." Nabiki's voice was dry as she spoke. "Aren't you a bit young though?"
"Mid-childa law is kinda funny like that." Fate spoke softly. "So long as it's not really us right now, they don't care. Technically though, we could be considered adults if we wished it. Mages of high level are considerably more mature than their age would indicate."
"Never quite got that myself." Ranma commented with a frown. "I know pops got into all sorts of trouble when he and I were tramping around."
"That's because your father is near insane with his training." Nanoha pointed out flatly. "I respect his knowledge, but sometimes he scares me."
"You just say that because he lectured you for hours about pushing yourself too hard." Ranma pointed out with a raised eyebrow.
"Wait you respect that lazy ass?" Nabiki asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Tch. He's an idiot, a thief, and a bastard." Ranma coughed out. "But he's my pops."
"There are worse parents." Fate offered quietly and somberly. "Genma cares. If he fails in all else, at least he loves his son."
"New topic!" Nanoha blurted out in an attempt to change the subject. "So Ranma, when are you going to marry Akane?"
"What?" Ranma jerked backwards. "Where tha hell is that coming from?"
"I'm not exactly happy with that idea either." Akane pointed out quickly.
"Didn't you say that your father wanted you to marry before a certain age?" Nanoha frowned and looked up into the sky. "Something about you carrying on his legacy?"
"Yeah pops said he want's me married, but there was nothin' about a legacy." Ranma muttered out. "Plus it doesn't have to be Akane."
"Huh?" Akane blinked a few times. "Since when did you get a choice? For that matter, why didn't you tell me?"
"I didn't?" Ranma scratched his head and inched back. "Pops would prefer it, but he didn't say to who I needed to get hitched to."
"Daddy was rather insistent that it be a Tendo." Nabiki pointed out. "He would be pretty offended if you didn't marry one."
"If he doesn't' want to I'm not going to force him." Akane muttered out peevishly. "Lets talk about something else please? This is kinda uncomfortable."
"Hmm." Fate pursed her lips and looked around the room as the everyone else feel silent. "Well, I did bring a few pictures of when we were children..."
"Oh no." Ranma went pale. "Please no."
"Noooo!" Nanoha wailed as Fate pulled out a large book of photos. "Not that book!"
"Well, you see here is what Nanoha and Ranma refer to as the 'wine incident'." Fate began calmly, ignoring Ranma and Nanoha's tears of despair.
The conversation went up, down and around. There were tears, and there were laughs. A fair amount of time was spent on Ranma's failings, but Nanoha dealt with her fair share too. Eventually everything began to wind down as it got dark, and it was time for everyone to leave.
"Thank you for having us." Suzuka bowed to the Tendos as the rest of the girls put on their shoes.
"It was a pleasure." Kasumi bowed back and handed the girl a small box. "A treat for you to eat on your trip back."
"Wow, it got dark." Nanoha looked up into the sky.
"Yes.." Fate trailed off as she looked into the distance. "Is that Happosai?"
Almost everyone's eyes went wide open as they watched the gigantic version of Happosai begin move in the distance. Then to add to the surreal scene a massive version of Genma grew into sight, and the two began to ponderously move towards each other. It was like watching an old monster movie. The two massive figures clashed like sumo wrestlers, and then a few nearby buildings crumbled.
Ranma's mouth opened and closed a few times as both Nanoha and Fate turned towards him. "Can you do that?" Nanoha asked with wide eyes.
"Umm, No?" The boy asked and answered at the same time.
"Darn." Fate spoke, and then blushed as everyone looked to her with surprised expressions. "What? I think it would be funny seeing Ranma-Monster."
"Hmm." Nanoha frowned and thought a moment. "If we add a helmet to his battle armor, he would look like those funny Giant Mecha TV shows."
"That would be funny." Fate nodded, and blinked as Genma opened his mouth in the distance and sent out a blast of magic at the giant Happosai.
Not to be outdone, Happosai opened up his mouth. However instead of a beam there were dozens of small little bombs. Genma jerked back ponderously from the explosion and then jerked forward, headbutting his opponent. There was a strangely hollow sounding crack, and both combatants dropped backwards.
"That is the perfect ending for the day." Nanoha finally declared. "Lets get out of here before anything else happens."
"Right!" The rest of the girls exclaimed.
"You know, you two had this coming." Ranma muttered with a smirk on his face as he looked at his suffering father. "I think you had like three news stations come around and try to film your expansion trick."
The two people in question just groaned from their place on the floor of the Tendo household. Apparently, while impressive the giant trick was expensive to maintain and had a nasty style of feedback. Thus both Genma and Happosai were unable to move and suffering from extreme pain.
"Respect your elders!" The old man wheezed out, and the groaned from the pain.
"Ya think I don't know about how you manhandled my friends?" Ranma raised an eyebrow at the geezer. "I should just drop kick you out of here, but I won't cause you are crippled right now."
Soun just shook his head from his seated. Normally he was flat out terrified of Happosai, but right now he was just tired from lugging the two to the house, through several city blocks. Fortunately his daughters were in bed now. It was embarrassing enough that Ranma had stayed up to see them.
"You are getting such a training session later." Genma wheezed out.
Ranma just chuckled at the man and sat at the table. "So why did you bring the ol' perv here in the first place?"
"This is the master of our school." Soun replied quietly, glaring at his guest. "Show the proper respect."
Ranma raised an eyebrow at the man and turned to the old and shriveled man on the floor. "I think the amount o' respect I am showin' the old bastard is plenty. He molested my friends." The teen paused a moment. "Though Nanoha thought it was funny."
"She's a good girl!" Happosai chuckled slightly as he shifted to get a better position. "Almost makes me regret not training girls."
"For once I am thankful for sexism." Ranma shuddered from the thought.
Genma just shook in fear as the very same thought came into his head.
Chibi-Nanoha runs across the field chasing a panicked Chibi-Fate. She then tackles the blonde and there is a dust cloud. Then Chibi-Nanoha runs away with a pair of white panties. Off in the distance are all the Chibi-Knights laying on the ground with swirly eyes. Chibi-Nanoha has taken their underwear too. Hayate is in the background cackling.
Ranma and Genma both clapped their hands together in prayer while Soun and Happosai looked at the two with confused expressions. After a moment Ranma shook himself and peered at the old man.
"Say, if you are the master of the school, then you're the one that made that rule that I can only be a master if I get hitched." Ranma hunched down and smiled a bit menacingly. "I don't suppose you could repeal that."
"Bah." Happosai eyed the teen and snorted. "For one thing, I ain't seen anything about your supposed proficiency, for another thing I made that rule because these two numbskulls were driving me insane with their wistful sighs. It was either make the rule and kick them into their wives or deal with their blathering for the next year!"
"Well, that should make it easy for you to repeal it then." Ranma smiled happily, tucking away how his parents met into one corner of his mind.
"Fat chance boyo." The old man pulled out a pip and lit it with a spark from his hand. "You look like the exact same type as your idiot of a father."
Ranma snorted in response. "If I need ta get married it's no real problem, it's just a hassle and all. With all the weeping, and the whole white dress and everything else."
"Really." Soun perked up at that. "Then we can hold the wedding with Akane tomorrow!"
Ranma gave the man a flat look. "No chance, not with her."
"Huh?" Soun looked perplexed then angry. "Are you insulting my little girl?" The air around his head darkened and he eyes began to glow red.
"Gaahh!" Ranma twitched and fell back. "What the HELL?"
"Answer the question boy!" The man's face distorted and a began to change into a demonic looking mask.
"If I get married it's NOT going to be Akane." Ranma shuddered and rolled back again. "In fact, I ain't marrying any o' your daughters period."
"You are insulting my girls!" Soun declared and shot to his feet, somehow managing to grab and don a set of samurai armor in an instant. "Die!" He pulled back on the bow he had grabbed and fired several shots at the boy.
"Hey, hey!" Ranma dodged the first few shots and the rolled his eyes. "All right this is silly." Sweeping back a bit the pig-tailed martial artist just said one word. "Nayru."
"Jest'!" The device replied, sounding almost amused.
In a flash Ranma's armor appeared and the next arrow deflected off his armor harmlessly. The boy looked on as Soun charged forward, firing the entire time. Then suddenly his entire body was banded up in bright white lines that restricted his movement and prevented him from firing.
"Listen." Ranma glared as he walked up to his host. "You have been really good about keepin' me here, but I don't give a damn about what who you think I should marry. You get pushy like this and I will just leave, no matter what pops says."
"But.. But.." Soun looked back to his friend. "Genma!"
"What do you expect me to do?" His friend called back from his place on the ground, but groaned as he heaved himself to his feet. It obviously hurt a lot, and the man was sweating as he walked to where his friend was bound. "Listen old friend. If the boy doesn't want to do it I'm not going to force him."
"Huh." Ranma looked a bit surprised at his father before shaking his head. "Listen, your girls are cool an' all, but they aren't my type."
Soun looked perilously close to tears, and then without warning he began to blubber. "Whahaha! Our plans and dreams of uniting the schools!"
Genma sighed and patted his friend on the back, before staggering and slumping to the ground. "There there."
Ranma rolled his eyes and walked inside to where Happosai was. "Now about that repeal."
"Not a chance boy." The old man cackled and blew out a cloud of smoke. "Really, you have to appreciate the good things in life. Marry one of those hot numbers you call friends, pop out a few kids. You know, actually insure the next generation is there."
The teen's eyebrow twitched. "Yeah... Lets not go there so I don't have to kick you across the district. How about this, you and I fight, then when I win you make me a master."
Happosai laughed. "Deal."
Happosai puttered around the attic of the Tendo home as he let his body recover. While he had put up a good front for the boy he was not exactly confident of his assured victory. You didn't get as old as he had without making sure things were stacked in his favor. There were too many variables for him to be totally confident of winning. Sure he could probably pull it off, but really why expend the effort when a bit of cheating would let him sail through.
The fight was tomorrow evening, not enough time to get a proper scope on the capabilities of the young upstart. Genma wouldn't be any help, the man was surprisingly hard to get proper information out of. Happosai could get a few ideas by the way the man had fought him at the bar though.
What he knew worried him. That armor the boy had worried him more. It was on par with his more dangerous artifacts, and worse it seemed fully controllable. So he probably needed to negate that and go from there. Maybe a bit of pre-match harassment to exhaust the boy too. He had a demon summoning scroll just begging to be used somewhere.
The old man nodded to himself as he hopped down the stairs and into the second floor of the house. Now to get an idea of how to negate that advantage. The boy should be asleep by now, and a little bit of thievery would be a great way to start things off. If he only knew what to look for.
"Hello Gramps." The voice made the old man blink and actually pay attention. It was the middle daughter of Soun. A hot number, but far from his type, she was too unfit physically.
"Now what are you doing up so late?" The old man asked with a raised eyebrow. "Were you waiting for little old me? I'm flattered, but you really aren't the girl for me."
Nabiki gagged and shuddered at the same time. "Just for that this is going to cost extra. How would you like some information on your opponent tomorrow?"
"Really now?" Happosai gave a small cackle and smirked at the girl. "Tell you what, tell me what you know and I can decide on the payment."
"Nah, uh." The girl waved her finger with a small smirk. "You don't get the goods until you cough up the cash. I can guarantee it will be worth your while though."
The old man rolled his eyes. "How much?"
"Ten thousand Yen." Nabiki made her offer with a wide smirk.
Happosai sputtered. "What are you trying to do, rob me? Five hundred!"
"Please, this is good information. A little old man like you fighting against a big strong guy like Ranma needs the help." The girl chuckled at the mans outrage.
"Five thousand then. It has to be good information though." The old man replied with a frown.
"Seven thousand." Nabiki countered quickly.
"Fine fine." Happosai muttered and fished in his robes. "If this isn't good information all your underwear is going to be missing tomorrow."
"Tch." Nabiki scoffed and took the money greedily. "This is prime stuff. I got a few tapes of when he wasn't careful in his fights, and I know what his weakness is. You take the gemstone he has hanging around his neck and drop it in this safe I know of and he can't do half the magic tricks he normally does."
"Really now?" Happosai chuckled a moment. "Magic items like that take a bit of proper handling. You wouldn't be trying to get this old man shocked would you?"
Nabiki rolled her eyes at the him. "If someone as old as you doesn't have a way of keeping himself from getting caught then you deserve what you get."
"Hahah!" The old man laughed a moment and smirked at the girl. "Get me those tapes and I can get you that gemstone, since you want it so badly."
"Oh, you saw right through me." Nabiki mock pouted. "It's not as if you can hide it, the very first thing his friends are going to check is you."
Happosai waved his hand and began to walk back up to the attic. "Give me those tapes by tomorrow."
The old man smirked to himself as he ascended the stairs. He did so happen to have a way of stealing something as magical as that gemstone would be. While Genma was the thief, he wasn't half bad himself. The thing was he knew what to steal and when to steal it.
The poor girl probably thought he would just gift wrap the thing, but if this item was as potent as he thought it wouldn't like being away from it's master. He only needed it contained for about a day after all. Once he was done with that, well...
What happened after that was up to the boy's friends. After all, the girl was going to be the one with the evidence. He was just the innocent old man defending his title. Now to figure out what he was going to steal the device with, and what to summon the demon to do. That part was actually probably going to be a bit harder than the whole theft thing.
With a groan Ranma twitched and rolled over, trying to decide if he should sleep in or actually get up today. In the back of his mind he knew that he had that match today, but since he didn't actually have school or anything else, he was sincerely tempted to just sleep in. He tossed the idea back and forth in his head for a moment before finally lurching to his feet and groggily moving to where he kept Nayru. Leaning down the teen frowned and then straightened up and looked around the room he shared with his father.
"What the?" The pig-tailed teen muttered and concentrated on his link with his device. "Where is she?"
With a deeper frown the boy kicked up his pack ad then rolled over his bed. His link with the device was totally silent as well, so he couldn't just call the device back. Finally in desperation he kicked his sleeping father and checked under that bed as well. Genma continued to sleep without worries as his son became increasingly frantic.
"Happosai." Ranma growled and the sprinted out of the room and down to where he heard the old man talking.
"Now this is just what the doctor ordered Kasumi!" The man in question smiled happily as he bit off another piece of his breakfast. "You are going to make some man deliriously happy, I know it!"
Kasumi just giggled softly from her place at the table. And giggled again when Ranma lifted up the old man bodily and shook him. "Now now Ranma, don't be too rough. Your match isn't until this evening after all."
"Where is Nayru!" Ranma growled out. "I know you have something to do with her missing!"
"Nayru?" Happosai looked utterly unconcerned about the manhandling. "Who is this Nayru? Is she another one of those beauties I have heard so much about?"
"Nayru is the gemstone I have around my neck all the time! Where IS she?" The teen shook the old man as he growled out.
"I have no idea!" The old master tolerated the shaking only for a moment before slipping out of the hold and darting to the opposite end of the table. "Besides, even if I did know, it's part of Anything Goes to go for the weakest point! That's actually why I summoned the demon."
"Wait, demon?" Ranma looked to the people around table and then to the old man. "What demon?"
"I wanted some massive oni, or maybe something tricky when I performed the ritual." The man in question said from his place at the table. "Instead I got some sort of jester girl. She's got no chest to speak of and she's creepy, but she said she could keep you busy all day. That's all I needed anyway."
"And where is this demon?" The teen asked with a frown.
"My cue I believe?" A high pitched voice made everyone turn.
Both martial artists in the room frowned. They had been sure that no one had been there before, and yet now there was something. Despite himself Ranma found the hairs on the back of his neck stick up. She was petite, dressed in a harlequin outfit who's colors seemed to be washed out. At first glance she looked cute more than anything else with the white painted face and sincere smile. Yet the sense of something wrong seemed to ooze around her.
"We've heard of your exploits!" She chirped and then disappeared and reappeared behind Ranma.
The teen jumped and twisted in surprise as the girl giggled. "And I couldn't resist taking the chance to play! You may call me Mad!"
"Gack!" Ranma jumped and twisted again in his attempt to get away as a massive plant burst from the ground and attempted to twist around him.
"And we are going to have so much fun!" The girl chirped again. "So, much, fun." A sinister cast flowed over her face and she smiled too wide for a human face.
The plant that had so suddenly burst from the ground wilted, and Ranma took a wary step back as a sickening gas began to seep from it. Then with a jump he exited the house as another vine attempted to grab him.
"Just till the evening right?" The demon girl looked to the still sitting old man who nodded warily. "I'm so sad. I would have loved to play forever and ever and ever and ever." The girl laughed shrilly and disappeared.
"I might have overdone it a bit." The grandmaster of Anything Goes frowned thoughtfully at the ruined floor of the house.
"Almost forgot!" Mad's voice came from nowhere, and the floor of the house repaired itself. "Can't be a bad guest now can I?"
"Ah well!" The old man shrugged his shoulders. "No point in worrying about spilled milk and all that. Do you have seconds?"
Kasumi looked from the floor of the house and then to the Grandmaster. Then with a shrug she went back into the kitchen to grab more food for the man.
"Come on! You can do better than that!" Mad's voice singsonged as Ranma dodged the whipping vines frantically.
There was no rhyme or reason to the attacks. No pattern to it, just an instant where the ground rippled and then a man-sized vine would whip out at him. Worse was that they didn't disappear when they finished. They would go limp and start to rot terrifyingly fast. The teen had already been forced to abandon the Tendo backyard and get to the backstreets. In crossed some corner of his mind that there should be people around right now. The streets were empty.
"Dance for me my puppet, dance!" The girl howled out and appeared before Ranma with her disturbing smile in place.
Not one to pass up a free opening Ranma slammed his fist into the demon's jaw, not holding back, and taking the lower part of the girl's face clean off. The girl toppled to the ground limply.
"Urk." Ranma went a bit green and staggered back. He really had thought the girl had been more durable than that.
Just as he meant to go look at the body a voice from behind him made him jump. "Oh me, oh my, you killed me!"
Twisting with all his speed Ranma looked behind himself and felt his eyes widen. There was the girl, missing jaw and all. Worse was the fact that small black bugs were starting to appear in the place of blood, and they were seeming to reform her porcelain white face. Soon she was whole with her smile still in place.
"Damnit." Ranma darted back full throttle and away from the girl.
"Now where were we?" The girl placed a hand on her face and pouted in thought. "I forget."
Whatever she would have said next was impossible to say as a massive blast enveloped her form. Reinforcements had arrived.
"Really Saotome, you find the strangest opponents." Vita set down in front of the boy.
"Indeed." Signum wound up whip Levantine and shot the weapon into the dust cloud where the girl presumably still was.
"Bout time." Ranma muttered and turned to be sure that the creepy demon hadn't snuck up behind him.
"The entire area is in a dimensional field. Very subtle and centered on you." Signum stated calmly as her weapon snapped back into sword form. "Fate, Hayate, and Nanoha are staying behind to see if they can locate Nayru. Considering what this creature is doing it's probably a good thing that it's up."
"Oh you ain't seen nothing yet love." The demon's voice made all three combatants look up and to the side where the demon was perched lazily on the rooftop. "You see, since all I was summoned to do was to keep Ranma-darling busy, I get quite a bit of power leased to me. Such fascinating things I can show you all."
"Lets not." Vita snapped out and with two quick motions knocked several blasts of power toward where the demon was perching.
"I am the one who lives for this." The girls voice came from all around them, and then she appeared off in the distance slowly raising her arms. "Destruction and Carnage I bring."
"Get her." Ranma muttered as he began to sprint toward the demon. "That sounds like a spell."
"Yeah I get that." Vita replied as she and Signum shot into the air and blurred with speed.
"Decay, and Rot, and Madness." The demon smiled widely and her body seemed to sag sickeningly. "Such awful and terrible things."
Signum's blade sliced the demon in half, and like tearing paper the demon's clothing was split in half and it fell to the ground, empty. With a frown she poked the cloth, and then looked up as both her comrades stopped next to her.
Just as one of them were about to speak, a moan came from the ruined battleground behind them. From the decaying remnants of the vines bodies lurched up, tattered remnants of former people. A veritable army of zombies lurched.
"You have got to be kidding." Ranma muttered as he looked at the horde.
Bit of a hiatus, sorry for that. That said, enjoy the new chappy.