I'm going to start working on chapter 14 right away. I think that it will be the last one or so and I have a really great idea for the ending, so see you later!
Don't cry
Chapter 14
The days that followed slipped away without he was really aware of it. He remembered the rain splashing on his naked skin at a moment. Why he has been half naked, he wasn't sure. It felt like the touch of the rain made him go crazy and he had hurried up getting rid of his shirt, before tasting the new sensation. He was cold, alone and lost. Nonetheless, he enjoyed every drop of rain that trailed down his face and then followed the curve of his neck and his chest. He wanted to get rid of all this hate. A sick laugh took over him and he let himself laugh it all away. And then it became pitch black.
Of course, he never fell asleep. It was too dangerous for him to doze off like that. Just as he didn't lose consciousness over a lack of strength; he wasn't weak enough to act this way.
Only, he dove into a state so deep that he had lost knowledge of what was going on around him. Now that he thought about it, the events came back slowly to his mind. It bothered him that he had been vulnerable for a moment.
He remembered pieces of what happened in the past hours. He had ran in the fields outside Konoha through the night, ignoring the cold wind and the rain storming against him and kept going forward, with no idea whatsoever of why he was doing this. Then he found himself in front of the door of his apartment, gasping and exhausted. The door opened and Temari showed up, surprised.
Gaara slid inside, but tripped in the doorway. The kunoichi caught him before the sand did purely by automatism and the two of them stayed stunned. Finally, he relaxed his body a little bit and let his sister walk him to his room. When she saw how wet his clothes were, she tried to undress him but Gaara stopped her by holding her wrist tightly in the middle of her actions. When he let her go, Temari hurried to exit the room, leaving her brother alone. He lied down on his bed and his head inclined on one side, he watched the rain falling by the window. He felt strangely sad, empty and tired, though he couldn't exactly tell what made him feel that way. A small voice has reappeared in his head since a while, his mother's. She was singing to him a lullaby that Yashamaru himself used to tell him and that made him even more nostalgic of the woman he had never met. However, his mother loved him. Someone loved him in this world.
Temari came back with a bowl of soup and put it down on his night shelf, before she sat down in a rocking chair, next to the bed. He said nothing over her presence; he didn't mind it. It was kind of comforting, actually. He told himself that maybe there was a second person that also loved him after, as he observed her.
Another memory had resurfaced. He was in his bed and Temari seemed to have left the room because he found himself alone after a quick inspection. However, he wasn't alone completely alone. His mother was there, whispering to his ear how bad Hinata has been to him. He became angry without really understand why, struggling with conflicting feelings. Hell, he never had to even deal with so much feelings before. Not upon what he considered before a trivial matter. Love, wasn't it a synonym for lust? So did he feel lust towards Hinata?
No… Lust sounded stained with an ill essence, associated with a perverted meaning. It didn't match with what he felt towards Hinata. Nothing was impure about it.
Gaara groaned in annoyance and got out of the bed, before walking to the window. He stared absently outside for a while, observing the sun shining brightly upon the village, the children playing innocently a few streets further, the birds flying into the sky. Then he shook his head; which one was really filled with dark intentions, the whole world or only him?
He opened the window and jumped out, bouncing from buildings to buildings, from tree to trees, looking for something, someone.
Suddenly, the sand ninja came to a halt. The hospital stood just in front of him. He approached the medical building, until he landed on a branch next to a window in particular. In the room, a patient was sleeping in his bed, unaware of the hatred Gaara bore towards him since the preliminaries of the Chunin exam.
The young sand ninja came down of the three in which he was perched. He was dangerously calm as he passed through the hospital main gate and surprisingly, he started noticing with an incredible light everything that surrounded him. He caught sight of a pink haired girl who walked in barely a minute after he did. He hid in a vacant room while she looked around for anyone. The nurses had left and so she decided to sign her name on the board. He snorted lightly at her innocent behaviour, and she turned around in surprise. He silently cursed him and luckily for him, the young girl shrugged and left. As soon as she was gone, he reappeared and perked at the board.
Sakura Haruno, hmph.
It was for the best that she didn't see him here. He hated weaklings like her. Her fight with the blond girl bored him to no end. Obviously, her world was pretty and well, with no bloody memories, unlike him.
Gaara took the nearest stairs and climbed the floors with no haste. He had plenty of time to kill the object of his torment, Rock Lee, the boy that was loved by his teacher, the one that knew the love of someone and was protected by that person. Something that he would never have.
His mother had left him, maybe because she had sense Gaara's hatred towards her or maybe because the demon had sniffed the good occasion to manifest itself. The gourd shook by itself, the sand within it swirling.
Finally, he stood in front of the room that he has been looking for. The Haruno girl just exited the room before he made it on the third floor. He opened the door and closed it behind him without a sound. A fresh flower has been put in a vase, the same one that Gaara used to offer to Hinata. At the memory, a sharp pain pierced through his head and he grabbed it between his hands. The cap of his gourd popped and fell on the ground. Like a snake, the sand flowed out and slid on the ground and then crept along bars of the bed to end around its next victim.
Starting then, he remembered everything clearly. Not only what happened next but also memories of the past, like his uncle Yashamaru smiling sweetly at him while rubbing his head or in blood, admitting that he had never liked him in the first place. Gaara placed one of his hands above Lee's face, shaking, while the sand moved around the sleeping boy more and more.
And at the critical moment, he came to close his hand and end it all… and realised that he couldn't move it, not even of an inch. A fist that connected with his face followed and without thinking, he rubbed the place he had been hit.
Two scoundrels had achieved to penetrate into the room, unbeknown to him, and one of them captured him with a shadow technique that he recognized quickly. It was them.
His shield of sand that had risen too late to protect him cracked a little and fell apart, bits of sand landing down on the floor.
For that matter, the sand had frozen around Lee's neck, interrupted rudely in its task. Gaara wanted to kill them both at this instant and go on with his activity, until that guy with blond hair and whisks on his cheeks, the idiot that won the preliminaries by pure luck, stated that Gaara also had a monster within in. Gaara then looked the blond moron with new eyes. Someone that was just the same as him existed?
He felt the urge suddenly to explain to them how he was born as this, a demon, to share with them his story, a story of horror, lack of love and many attempt of murders on him, a little boy that had the misfortune of being born in this shattered family, until he developed his own reason to live and exist, finally. All that fuelled his will to survive was to kill anyone that was stronger than him, because they threatened his very existence, and to love only himself, because no one ever loved him…
At that moment, he threw his sand towards the two frightened children, to feel alive another time…
Then another person came to stop him short in what he was doing, again. Only this time, it was that cherished child's teacher. His head began to hurt as he remembered the fight. He had nearly killed Rock Lee. Only a few seconds and he would've felt that euphoria that he always sought. However, at the last moment, someone blocked his attack with a simple sweeping of his hand, refusing to let the child die. Why didn't he have the right to the same thing? Why was he despised?
The man ordered him to leave the fighting for tomorrow. Wearily, Gaara made a few steps towards the door and threw a last threat to the boys. And of course, he never said things for nothing.
He would kill them all.
Kira peered inside the room before going in. Miss Hinata lied on her bed, covered by a heavy quilt and her head sinking into the many cushions that was given to her. He could hear her steady breath and sighed, reassured. Last night, he couldn't help being worrying by her fragile health. When he had put his hand on her forehead, he frowned deeply. Her fever hasn't gone down ever since they had found her in the rain.
Kira laid down the tray of food and pressed his hand once again against her forehead. It seemed a little better now, warm but still. His lips closed together formed a small smile, as he took the advantage of the mistress not being conscious to slide a few bangs of hers through his fingers. Her indigo hair were just as soft as they looked, just like her mother's. Mistress Hinata never developed any characteristics of the Hyuga, except for her special ability. And still, she was the heiress. It was true that she was too soft, too innocent and naïve, not to say weak, but he found that that was what made her special, and maybe this is why that boy from the sand village fell in love with her.
Three days ago, while they were eating in the branch members' dining room all together, chatting with lightness, they heard a loud explosion, followed by some screams. At first, they didn't make a move, confused. Then another crash occurred, and they all reacted immediately. The sounds came from the garden, but ceased almost after they got up. He arrived last, and tiptoed to see above the heads blocking his view. Through the murmuring, a few persons said the mistress's name out loud and Neji's.
Did something happen between those two? Kira growled, before running towards the garden, pushing people aside, not caring for politeness.
That Neji, he must have attacked the heiress!
Everybody knew that the boy tried to kill the heiress at the preliminaries but because they were specifically fighting in a Chunin Exam, nobody could point Neji for endangering the Heiress's life. However, Kira never forgave him. If he hurt her, if he did, he would rip his head off!
Finally, he reached the garden, but stopped in midway. The rain fell strong against the two Hyuga in the middle of the garden, surrounded by flowers. Kira glanced left and right; the buildings suffered great damage, while the ground had been turned around here and there. The vegetation had been ripped up. All the beauty that the mistress's departed mother had put into this place, all the effort was wasted away by a few blows. And her daughter cried in her cousin's arms, her head pressing against his coat while Neji looked away, staring towards the forest for something unknown to Kira.
The Heiress was inconsolable ever since. She mourned for someone, stopped eating anything at all and didn't say one single word. In her sleep, she would murmur a name and then whimpered, tears falling into the cushions, absorbed. She had caught a cold, as expected by her cousin. She didn't get up at all, at least not when he was there. Her sadness infected the whole clan. Even though Hiashi didn't want to admit it, Kira guessed that his uncle was affected by this. Every day, he came to watch over her a little, before going back to work. Hanabi came from time to time too, with flowers. The young girl said something about her not being able to do as beautiful bouquets as the sand ninja, but he wasn't sure that he heard correctly.
Actually, Kira couldn't really believe this sand ninja, who broke his mistress' heart, brought her flowers every day at the hospital. Then again, if they did date, that would've been normal. He never saw himself that boy who, from the rumours, loved the mistress. However, Hiashi apparently approved of him and the boy must have been really something, but did his uncle's opinion changed about him? After all, he was responsible for the damage done in the garden and most importantly, the attack towards Hinata and Neji. Nobody really understood what happened. Neji didn't say much either, and the heiress was knocked out.
Kira sighed once again. The heiress would recover from the heartbreak. But looking at her made him doubt. She took it pretty hard.
He got up and was about to go back to the kitchen when he felt something tugging his shirt. In no time, he turned around, staring in disbelief. The heiress woke up, finally!
Hinata rolled her tongue inside her mouth, still sleepy. The brightness of the room hurt her eyes; she didn't want to wake up, not yet. Still, she pulled out an arm from the heavy quilt that squashed her and pulled Kira's shirt. He appeared to be pleasantly surprised, and she wondered why.
Kira kneeled down next to the bed and whispered "Hello, Miss Hinata. Welcome back."
Hinata rolled her head on the side, fighting to keep her eyelids open. What was Kira doing in her bedroom? Why was she still in her bed in the middle of the day? She had many questions like that that were waiting to be answered, but as she tried to sit up in her bed, Kira pushed her back. "You should stay here and rest a little more, Miss Hinata. You caught a cold and you shouldn't push yourself too hard".
"I-I… caught a c-cold?" Weird, how her cheeks were so flushed by the heat, and her lips dry. How did she catch it though?
Oh. That's right. It was raining… when he left.
Her heart clutched, but she tried not show the sadness that suddenly appeared. Still, she could not stop the quivering of her lips, nor did she realise that she had lowered her head, wanting to keep her thoughts to herself. Gaara had left, deceived by the answer she has given him.
She turned her head away to hide her face, and her eyes fell on white flowers inside a vase. She gasped in surprise, bringing her hands to her lips. Did he… d-did he come back?!
Kira followed her gaze. "Ah, aren't they beautiful? It's no wonder that Hanabi has so much talent to choose carefully a bouquet, since she learned from you", he said with a smile. He didn't see Hinata's traits falling down.
Hinata forced herself to say something, anything. "Sh-she never needed me, her talents come to her naturally. W-where is she, by the way?" Of course the flowers came from Hanabi. No way would Gaara come back after she rejected him so cruelly. However, it would be just like him to break into her house without anyone noticing to leave a bouquet of flowers. It would be just like him…
She felt so tired at that moment and discouraged. Life kept going, while she lazed behind. Hinata sighed. Everything would go back to normal, would it? Gaara and she didn't know each other before and she had no problem with that. Kiba, Shino, Kurenai-sensei and Naruto always provided her the love she yearned for. Just not the same kind… "I-I want to thank Hanabi properly. D-do you know w-where she might be?"
"I'm sorry, Miss Hinata, but Hanabi went with uncle Hiashi to the main matches to watch Neji. They won't be coming home before the end of the day."
The matches… "W-w-w-what?!" Her voice pierced Kira's ears. He wasn't used to this tone of voice from Miss Hinata. Her stuttering also came back in force. "T-th-th-the main m-matches?!"
Less than a second later, she was already out of her bed, turning her head left and right. "Oh no, w-what will I d-do!"
Kira could only watch as Hinata ran everywhere, grabbing clothes and accessories. Then she turned around, giving him an embarrassed look. "B-But Miss Hinata, you're still sick! You can't go to the matches. Hiashi will kill me for that!"
Hinata bowed her head, pleading Kira. "P-please, I-I have to! I'll explain e-everything t-to Father, promise!" She waited eagerly for his answer. He inhaled deeply and turned around. "Alright, but don't do anything reckless." As soon as the door was closed, Hinata hurried getting her pyjama off. Gaara, I'll be there. Even though you don't want me anymore, I want to see you one last time. Just one last time!
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Kiba's nose itched and he frowned at the familiarity of the smell. He sniffed again, and assured that he wasn't wrong, he followed the odour, turning around himself. "Wha…? Hinata!"
He never needed his eyes to guess her presence. However today, he found that she had changed clothes. She switched her regular fighting clothes and her coat for a pair of black pants and a blue shirt with long sleeves. The color brought a little more of life to her face that was paler than usual. "Weren't you supposed to stay in bed?"
She finally met up with him, gasping. He looked at her, worried. "I… I didn't want… t-to miss t-the matches! Whew…" Then she glanced towards the field, searching for something. Her breathing calmed down a little bit. "T-they haven't started yet."
Kiba frowned. Despite that evidence, Hinata was still looking for something, or someone. "Hmph, your boyfriend isn't there yet, relax."
Hinata whirled around to face, shocked. The accusation made her blush with shame while somewhere in her head, a little voice reminded her of the situation. Head down, she avoided to look at Kiba. "W-we a-aren't t-together a-anymore…" She couldn't help choking on the words, almost stopping at such a simple sentence. It was so simple and yet, difficult! And she stumbled on difficulties, when all Hinata wanted was to pretend nothing ever happened, that she never fell upon a dangerous murderer that seduced her in the end.
"Huh?" Kiba was surprised, and she could feel his eyes on her, searching a sign that would tell that she was lying, but he couldn't find any. So he mumbled a few words of apology. "Oh… sorry. Don't mind me." Hinata couldn't help but to be sad that Kiba didn't sound more sincere than that. Of course, she had sensed that he has been jealous all along, but never wanted to believe it. And right now, she didn't want to deal with it, so she ignored him and concentrated on the battlefield. Gaara would show up soon, too soon for her tastes.
"Hey, I can see two open seats here. Follow me. Oh man, the matches are already beginning! Hurry up Hinata!"
But Hinata wasn't following him anymore. Her gaze was glued on the line of people walking towards the center of the field and especially one of these people. Gaara!
He stood next to his siblings and Neji, an infuriated look on his face. Hinata couldn't start imagining what went through his head, but despite that, she felt extremely ashamed at that moment. She couldn't get her eyes off him, noting every detail of his body to the last one. As if it would be the very last time that she would see him. And it might be.
Her mind was put somehow at ease as the first match began. Neji and Naruto took place, each of them evaluating the other one. Then Naruto launched three kunai that were easily deflected by Neji and the match began. She allowed herself not to think about Gaara, but worrying more about Naruto's life, the person she used to like. Her feelings might have changed a little bit, but she hoped that he would win against Neji, as unlikely as it seemed. And she knew this fight was for her, so she rooted for him with all her heart.
Just as she wished, he won the match fair and square, revealing a force unknown to all of them. She repressed the desire to giggle when he paraded around, intoxicated by all the cheering. After that, they had to wait a while, and a match was delayed, while another one was cancelled. Shikamaru almost his match, but he just gave up, out of the blue.
So that left only the match that was delayed, Gaara's.
Sasuke Uchiha appeared at the last second, the wind blowing in his air, looking as cool as ever. The world almost stood still at this moment.
Gaara finally showed up, no emotion whatsoever on his face, not a glance to see if she might be perhaps in the stands, waving at him. Only a clear desire to fight.
And kill. Just like she expected of him.
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Eh eh… Yeah, it took a really long time to update. So, for those who have sharp eyes, you might have noticed that the days in the story don't work. In Gaara's part, he was one day away for the matches while Hinata is three to four so… yeah, pay no attention to it. Also, I'm won't be sticking to the original story as much as before anymore.
So the chapter will end here, just to annoy you! The next one should be up in (less than a month). The exam period is starting but school should be over by December 15th, around that. Then I'll write, write and write!
Read and Review!
PS: I had to use Notepad to update my fic because it wouldn't work with Microsoft word and I couldn't contact service. I really wished that they would do something about problems in my account, it isn't funny!