Chapter 13: ...My Dear Executioner

Clary

Let me make one thing clear about my actions tonight: I should've known better than to believe Negan. He might keep his word, but the two-faced son of a whorebag will lie through his teeth just as many times. I learned that the hard way.

The Savior behind the wheel of the van we were all thrown into the back of was anything but gentle, hitting apparently every bump in the road so we'd be knocked into each other or into the side of the van. At one point, Daryl's right shoulder, the one Dwight shot, hit the side of the van. He let out a yelp of pain, which caused the guys up front to laugh at him. Bucky had to hold me down, locking his metal arm in place around my waist. "You remembered, didn't you?" he whispered. "Everything, I'm guessing."

"Laugh again, you sorry shits!" I shouted up at the Saviors. Dwight simply raised his hand, flipping me off. "Go fuck a goat, you dickless wonder!"

"Someone get her a gag," Dwight sighed.

"We're almost there," the Savior behind the wheel replied. "In fact, we are here."

"Where the hell are we?" Bucky demanded.

"Welcome," Dwight said, turning to look back at us, "to your new future."

Rick

"Any change?" Sasha called as I carried fuel to the RV.

"She's getting worse," I regretfully told them.

"Good call on the transport," Abraham complemented, stopping by the door with Sasha at his side.

"I figured she'd be more comfortable."

"Also means you got room for more. They're out there, so I'm gonna be there with you." He glanced over at Sasha. "We are."

"Package deal," she added, leading Abraham into the RV.

"Uh, what she said," Eugene told me as I noticed him behind the duo.

"Look, it's a long trip," I said. "And you're just getting over—"

"It's a superficial graze," he argued. "Proteins are binding, plus we need to discuss ammunition production and manufacture, so let's roll."

"Steve and I already tried," Abraham told me, climbing out of the RV to grab a bag. "Give him an inch, he takes it a mile."

"I'm only asking for twenty-three, give or take, depending on the route. I know I could be of some help. Now's the time and here's the place. Don't shine me. I'll be your anchorman. Yes, I damn will."

With that, he climbed into the RV, not giving me time to argue.

Carl

"Glenn's still not back," Enid tried as she followed me into the armory. "I need to be there for Maggie."

"I said no, Enid!" I replied, putting whatever guns and ammo we need into a bag.

"Carl."

"Look, you were wrong before. This place isn't too big to protect. And you need to stay back and help protect it."

"This place is ready. Most of us have been trained, you know that. If you were worried about an attack, you wouldn't be leaving."

"You know how far the Hilltop is? You know what could happen? Those Saviors are out there. You know what they did to Denise. What they tried to do with Maggie and Carol, to Clary, to Daryl, to Rosita, Eugene. That's not happening to you, alright? I'm not gonna let it."

Enid quieted down, watching me as I loaded my gun, then said, "You want to run into them right? You hope they show up. Jesus, Carl, this is about getting Maggie to a doctor! Not about your damn grudge match against them! Screw you, I'm going."

"Enid, stop!" I barked, moving to block her. "Just wait."

"Get out of my way. Carl!"

I didn't budge, but I did think of a way to keep her from going. "Just grab some pistols from the closet," I told her. "But hurry. We've gotta go now."

Enid ran for the closet, and as soon as she was in, I slammed the door shut, using a chair to keep it closed. "Carl!" Enid shouted from inside. "Dammit! Carl! Carl! What happens if you don't come back? How am I supposed to live with that? What the hell am I supposed to do?"

"Just survive somehow," I said, remembering the words she wrote on the paper she slid under my door, her way of saying goodbye after the Wolves. I walked out, trying to ignore the banging on the door as she tried to get out. I headed towards the RV, hearing Aaron and my father before I reached them. "We're ready to protect this place, and the Saviors know it," Aaron said. "That's why they grabbed Eugene."

"It's not up for discussion," my dad told him.

"Then you're just gonna have to punch me in the face and tie me up again. 'Cause that's what it's gonna take to stop me."

My dad sighed, giving in, and nodded Aaron on. He climbed into the RV, and I followed him in. I took a seat at the table, watching out the door as Steve arrived, his shield on his back as usual. "Abraham said you were coming," my dad said.

"You could use the muscle," Steve replied. "The Saviors are still out there. There's more of our people out there. Bucky, Clary, Glenn, Daryl. Michonne, Rosita. We gotta find 'em."

Rick jerked his head towards the door, signalling for Steve to go ahead in. He took a seat at the table across from me, quietly saying, "I could be wrong."

"What?" I questioned.

"About it being the Saviors. Hydra's hard to defeat. There might be more. They might've found them. Bucky and Clary might be back with them, not themselves anymore. We have to be ready."

"How? They're supersoldier assassins."

Steve reached into his bag, pulling out a black leather bound notebook with a red star, and a red leather bound notebook with a black star. "I know that book," I said, picking up the red one. "It's Clary's."

"Kind of," Steve replied. "It's actually about Bucky. He just gave it to her. Same with the black one. It's hers, but Bucky's in possession of it. That has everything you need to know about the Winter Soldier in it. And this..." Steve held up the black one, "is all about the Executioner."

"Steve… I can't look at that." I pushed the two books back towards him. "I can't think about what they did to her."

"Okay," Steve said, taking them back. "You don't have to. But if you realize that's not them, you have to do something. They both have shut down phrases. It's a word that basically knocks them out and they go back to who they are. You can't fight them, so you have to use them."

"You gonna tell me what they are?"

"Bucky's word is Sputnik. Kremlin is Clary's. Got that?"

"Bucky, Sputnik. Clary, Kremlin. Yeah."

I looked back towards the door as Steve flipped open the two notebooks, reading through them. I watched as Father Gabriel arrived, a rifle on his shoulder, to report, "We have twenty-four hour shifts set up on each of the watchtowers, each one of them fully supplied and ready. In the case that we're incurred upon, we have drivers assigned, evacuation and distraction, and the rendezvous we discussed. In the event of any emergency, my first priority is Judith. I will not fail you. Are you comfortable leaving me in charge of Alexandria's defense?"

My dad chuckled. "Yes."

"Hey, Rick," Spencer said, stopping my father before he could climb in the RV. "If the Saviors do show up… I don't know, I'm thinking, if it's not too late, should we try and make some kind of deal?"

"Tell them to wait for me," my dad said. "I got a deal for 'em." He climbed in the RV, closing the door behind him. "Alright, let's go."

"What the bitch?" Abraham exclaimed from the driver's seat, and we all stood as he slowed to a stop, looking to see what's in front.

"What is it?" my dad asked, pushing through us.

"Enemy close," Abraham answered. "Are we doing this?"

"No. We're getting out to talk."

We grabbed our weapons, but we didn't raise them as we followed my dad out of the RV. I looked over at Steve as we walked to find that his shield was on his arm. He's anticipating a fight, I realized. I stood next to Aaron as my dad stepped forward, his hands raised to show he wasn't looking for a fight. One of the men, probably a Savior, gestured down to a man lying on the ground below him. "He's someone who was with a whole lot of someones who didn't listen," the Savior called.

"We can make a deal," Rick called. "Right here, right now."

"That's right. We can. Give us all your stuff."

"Not this shit again," Abraham huffed under his breath.

"We'll probably have to kill one of you. That's just the way it is, but then we can start moving forward onto business." I tightened my grip on my gun, but I still didn't raise it, watching for the go-ahead from Dad. "All you have to do is listen."

"Yeah," he sighed, moving his hands to the machine gun he carried. "That deal's not gonna work for us. Fact is, I was about to ask for all of your stuff. Only I'm thinkin' I don't have to kill any of you. Any more of you, that is."

The Savior standing next to the head of this group made a show of shaking up a spray paint can, then painting an X onto the someone that wouldn't listen. The lead Savior sighed, saying, "Sorry, my deal is the only deal. We don't negotiate."

Rick nodded once, then waved his hand, telling us to go. "Me and my people are leaving."

"Okay, friend. Plenty of ways to get to where you're going."

Rick followed us to RV, then paused at the door, turning back to the Saviors. He called, "You want to make today your last day on earth?"

"No, but that is a good thing to bring up. Think about it. What if it's the last day on earth for you? For someone you love? What if that's true? Maybe you should be extra nice to those people in that RV, 'cause you never know." The Savior snapped his fingers. "Just like that. Be kind to each other. Like you said, like it was your last day on earth."

"You do the same," my dad told them, then climbed in, closing the door behind him.

For someone you love.

I didn't expect the words to hit me as hard as they did, but when they hit, she was the only thing I could think about. What Steve said about her being under Hydra's control again was all I could think about. In the days she was back in Alexandria, I saw what it did to her when she remembered Hydra. I saw the aftermath of all they put her through, and I never wanted her to have to go through that again. And at that moment, I thought she might have to. I thought I wouldn't see her again, and if I did, she'd either be the killer she wasn't or she'd be among the dead. I didn't know where the hell she was, I didn't know if she was alive, and that scared the hell out of me. God, Clary, where are you? Please, don't let today be your last day on earth.

Clary

As the door to the van we were being kept in opened, I saw that Dwight was standing there, wearing Daryl's vest and had his crossbow over his shoulder. I moved in front of Daryl, as if I could do something to block Dwight from hurting him any more. I felt Daryl's hand on my back, and I reached behind me, taking it. I gave it a gentle squeeze, murmuring, "It's okay, Daryl. It's gonna be okay."

Dwight looked from Bucky to me. "Alright, you two. You get to meet the big man first."

"Bucky?" I whispered, reaching beside me for his hand. More Saviors appeared, dragging us out of the van, while Dwight aimed Daryl's crossbow at our friends remaining in the van. As soon as we were out, they closed the doors again. Guns were prodded in our backs as we were marched to the back of one of the trucks, and Dwight forced us to kneel. Bucky and I looked at each other, then back to Dwight, giving him matching death glares. "It's called respect for the boss," Dwight snapped. "Learn it, live it, love it."

"Come any closer to me and I'll bite what's left of your dick off," I replied. Dwight narrowed his eyes at me, taking a step closer, and I bared my teeth. "I ain't lyin', dickless."

There was a laugh from inside the truck. It was one that would've belonged to a happy person before all of this, a laugh with humor. Now, it was empty. A humorless laugh, a dark chuckle. Once again, I found myself reaching for Bucky's hand. His hand wrapped around mine as soon as they touched, and it was then that I knew that Bucky was just as scared as I was.

The truck door opened, and a tall man in his late forties or early fifties stepped out. His hair was dark like his eyes, his beard salt and peppered. He wore a leather jacket, and as I looked him up and down, I noticed a baseball bat over one shoulder. I tightened my grip on Bucky's hand as I saw the barbed wire at the end. It made me wonder, what kind of a man is this if he carries a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire? It wouldn't do much with the walkers. It'd get caught in their hair, if anything. And walkers can't feel pain. The barbed wire, that was for a living person. I look up at Dwight, studying the burn on the side of his face. Daryl told me that it wasn't like that the last time they met, in the burned forest. What kind of man is this?

"Well, well, well," the man drawled out. "What do we have here?" He looked Bucky and I over, taking in our appearances, especially our arms. "My, my, my. Dwighty boy, you did good." He gestured towards Bucky. "You, I've heard of. The Winter Soldier, right? What you did in Vienna, that's impressive. But you…" He crouched in front of me. "You, I don't know. But judging by the arm, you're like him. What do they call you?"

"The Executioner," I said, dropping Bucky's hand as I lifted my chin, looking this man in the eye. I wasn't about to let him know I was terrified.

"The Executioner," he repeated. "I like it. Very… intimidating." He stood, stepping back as he looked down at Bucky and I. "Now… what am I forgetting? Oh, right! Introductions. Hi, I'm Negan. These are my men, the Saviors. And this…" Negan gestured to the bat on his shoulder. "This is Lucille."

"What do you want with us?" Bucky asked.

"Leave us," Negan ordered, and the Saviors turned to leave. Negan stepped back, sitting on the truck's tailgate. "You two can stand." Bucky and I stood, Bucky taking a step closer to me. "What's your name, Soldier? Your real name?"

"Bucky Barnes," he answered. "This is Clary Dixon."

"Well, Bucky, I'm glad you asked that. What do I want? I want you to work for me. And not in the same way your people will. They're going to gather, give me half of their shit. But you two, oh boy, do I have a job for you. I have my Saviors, and I have my lieutenants, but the one thing that I don't have? Mercenaries. And that's where you two come in. Supersoldier assassins, am I right?" Negan looked down at me. "Though you didn't bulk up like Captain America."

"Formula was different," I said. "But don't think that I ain't as strong as Bucky."

Negan's eyes drifted to my arm. "I'd bet you are." He swung his legs, looking at the two of us. "Like I said, I want you to work for me as mercenaries. 'Cause this world's a lot bigger than what you think it is. We've got some enemies, and I don't mean the dead. So, I'll give you two options. Do it the easy way, and do it voluntarily. Or you can fight me on it, and you'll still end up working for me."

Bucky took another step to the right, partially standing in front of me now. "My god," he said. "You're no better than Hydra. We won't do it. I'll die before I let anything happen to her."

Negan sighed, sliding off the tailgate. He left Lucille lying on it, instead pulling his gun out of its holster. "I can do that," he said with a shrug. "I mean, I don't really want to, but I can most definitely do that."

He raised his gun, aiming it directly at Bucky. I wasn't about to let Bucky be shot that day, or ever. Of course, I'm always willing to take a bullet for Buck, so I didn't hesitate to step in. I pushed Bucky to the ground, standing alone in front of Negan. I said, "You let my people go, I'll do it. Just me. Not Bucky. He's done his time. Seventy years, he's served. He goes free, and the others go free, too. You let them make it back to our home, safely. And the Executioner will work for you. Whatever you want."

Negan grinned wickedly, knowing he'd won. He said, "It's getting late. It'll be dark soon. Your people won't make it home before the sun sets. They have to get home safe, right? It's dangerous at night. So we'll let them go tomorrow. But tonight, you start working for me." Negan nodded towards Bucky. "Say your goodbyes, Soldier. She's going off to war."

Bucky didn't hesitate to get to his feet, wrapping his arms around me so tight I thought for a moment that he was going to break me. However, that didn't stop me from mirroring him. I wrapped my arms around him, squeezing my eyes shut as I breathed in his familiar scent. The leather from his jacket was there, and the ever present hint of metal from his arm. I don't know how else to describe it, but you know how different places smell different depending on the time of day? He reminded me of the woods at night, when a lot of people are too scared to go, but some feel safe. Bucky smells like safety, especially to me. He was home, and I didn't want to leave home again. That's why I instantly regretted my decision when I heard Bucky starting to cry.

"Hey, please don't," I whispered. I threaded my fingers through his hair, remembering how that used to calm him down when he was upset or scared. "It's gonna be okay, James. It'll be okay."

Finally, Bucky hissed, "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I couldn't see you like that again," I replied. "Go back with the others. Take care of them. Take care of Daryl."

"Don't leave me again," Bucky whispered. He released me, leaning back to look down at me; and I saw that his tears were rolling down his cheeks. I leaned up, wiping them away and kissing the spots where they were, as I fought tears of my own.

I made the split second decision, deciding that it would be easier on the others. "Bucky," I said, looking up at him. "The others, it's going to be hard on them seeing me working against them. That's why I have to ask you to do it. Say the words. Please."

"The words?" Bucky questioned.

"Don't bullshit me, Bucky. You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"Clary… I can't."

"James, please. I don't want this blood on my conscience. I want it on the Executioner's. And then I want you to tell me to follow Negan's commands." I took a couple steps back. "And one last thing. Tell the others I'm sorry."

Bucky closed his eyes, looking down, before taking a deep breath. "Okay."

"Thank you," I breathed.

I closed my eyes, letting my mind go blank like it was when they wiped me. Just like I said his activation words that one night, he said mine, in Russian as well. "Longing, rusted, sixteen, nightfall, furnace, nine, loyal, homecoming, seven… undead."

With each word, I could feel the Executioner rising, pushing me back. And when he said the final word, I was gone, and she was in my place. It was odd, it was the Executioner in control, but I still remembered everything that happened. Like some transformation of Jekyll to Hyde. I guess what's what happens when you activate the Winter Soldier or the Executioner without wiping us first. Clary's no more. It's only the Executioner. I opened my eyes, slowly looking up at him.

Bucky asked, "Palach?"

"Ready to comply," I responded in the language.

"Listen to me. If you're ordered to do something that you think is wrong in any way, you don't have to do it. Got it?"

"That… that's not the rules."

"They are now," Bucky said, speaking English now. "Those are the rules. You do what Negan says. And remember what I told you." He turned to Negan. "She's all yours."

Negan whistled, and Dwight and his men reappeared, seemingly out of nowhere. I watched as Bucky was escorted away, back to the van we came here in. "Executioner," Negan said, gesturing me over to him. "Your real name's Clary, right?" I nodded once. "You were with Hydra?" I nodded again. "How long?"

"Three months ago, I was out on a run. I was bitten." I lifted my right arm. "It's how I lost it. Some men from Hydra, they saved me, cut it off. I was already trained, thanks to the Winter Soldier. As soon as I recovered, they had me killing for them. So three months, I killed for them."

"How many people have you killed?"

"I lost track," I answered. "I don't know how many there were before Hydra. I stopped counting after thirty with them. They had me hit camps, groups that didn't want to work with them. Or were a threat."

Negan laughed, "You are gonna be fantastic working for me." He slung an arm around my shoulders, Lucille in his free hand. Negan turned me towards the horizon, watching as the sun set. "Good evening, my dear Executioner."

Carl

I leaned against the wall at Maggie's feet, looking through the blinds as I scanned our surroundings for walkers or Saviors. Or Hydra. I shuddered at the thought of the Nazi organization, praying that when my dad and the others rescued Clary, they eradicated them. I looked back at Aaron, who knelt next to Maggie. I asked, "Why didn't you help guard the place?"

"I owe her," Aaron said, looking down at Maggie. She fitfully slept, letting out whimpers every now and then. Aaron looked back at me. "What about you? Why are you here?"

"I owe them," I said, taking a seat by Maggie's feet. "I've been shot before. Maggie… her dad, Hershel, saved my life. I owe her." I looked down at my hands, then back to Aaron. "And Clary's out here. Steve thinks that Hydra might still be around. They're hard to take out. I don't know who it is, but whoever's out there, they might have Clary. She doesn't have a sense of who she is anymore. She doesn't remember how much she means to us. That's how she fought before. She fought so she'd make it back home to us. To me. She doesn't have that anymore. Adding in a fight to the mix… I'm worried she won't make it back."

"She'll be back," Aaron assured me. "She has to be. She knows we need her there. She knows we can't go on without her." He looked up at me. "She'll remember. One day, maybe not today or anytime soon, but one day, she'll know who she is. That's all you can hope for. That's all we can hope for. Clary's a fighter, a leader. We need someone like her with us."

"I don't think she's a leader, not anymore," I said with a shake of my head. "Before Hydra, hell yeah. I'd follow her anywhere, and I still would. But after all they did, Clary's not a leader anymore. They trained her to be submissive, to do whatever they told her to do. She can't lead anymore."

"Soldiers can lead," Aaron said. "They can. She can. She will."

"I hope so," I said with a small smile.

From the front of the RV, I heard Eugene say, "Logrun Road's a straight shot."

"We want visibility," Steve told him. "In enemy territory, you always want visibility."

"There, you got it on Shelton. Golf course, country clubs, sloping terrain. No bum rush from the boogeyman. We'd see them from a good piece. It is a longer trip by a third, but we'd get the scenic safety of clear-cut dingles and glens."

"You're being serious, right?" Sasha questioned.

"As coronary thrombosis."

"You got a route?" Dad asked. "Alright, let's go."

Rick

"Bitch nuts!" Abraham exclaimed as he pulled the RV to a stop yet again. I pushed through the others, leaning down to look out the windshield. To our right, more Saviors blocked the road. The left was clear, and we knew we couldn't go back. We came too far, and Maggie was getting worse. She needed help.

"Are we making our stand?" Sasha inquired.

Steve said, "Good a place as any."

"Yeah," Carl agreed. "We should end it."

"No," I argued. "Not now. They've been waiting. They're ready. With one of us behind the wheel, that's six on… sixteen, looks like. We're gonna play it our way, how we want it." I glanced back at Carl and Steve, who grew close in the time that passed since we thought Clary died. "Right?"

"Right," my son said. "But how do we know they're not corralling us? Like Terminus?"

I paused. "We don't. We just need to find another way around. Abe, go slow."

He slowly backed up a bit, then pulled the RV around, taking a left. We watched out the side windows, guns raised, as one of the Saviors fired three series of shots into trees. We continued on, and after a while, I moved back up between Sasha and Abraham. "How are we on gas?" I questioned.

"Half a tank," Abraham replied. "I pulled some more cans before we left."

"Those weren't the same men who blocked the road the first time," Sasha said.

"It's the same outfit, just different soldiers," Steve piped up. "They've got numbers."

I nodded, showing I understood. "We keep driving. We get her there."

"We will," Sasha confirmed.

Abraham added, "If we have to shove each and every one of them up their own asses."

He cursed under his breath as he pulled to a stop yet again, this time the road's blocked by a string of walkers, chained together. "We can't go through it," I said. "Can't risk the RV. You stay behind the wheel, just in case. We'll clear it."

We filed out of the RV, guns raised, and Abraham stayed inside, behind the wheel. As we made our way forward, to the walkers, Eugene said, "Putting together a red rover like that takes people. A lot of them."

"C'mon," I said. "Let's do this."

"Dad," Carl said, stopping me as I stepped up to face a walker with a familiar dread in its hair.

"That's Michonne's," Aaron added.

"That's one of the Dixons'," Sasha added, gesturing to a walker with arrows with green and white fletching. I reached up to pull the dread out, then moved to kill the walker with my hatchet, but gunfire rang out, and we all ducked down. "Get back to the RV!" I barked. "Go!"

They didn't listen, instead firing on the Saviors. They covered me as I chopped the walker's arm off, making a path to allow us through. As soon as I had the wall of walkers broken, I turned and ran, following the others back into the RV. The Saviors stopped firing, allowing us to pass. Steve and Carl sat at the table with Eugene and Sasha, staring down at the arrow on the table before him. "They have her," Carl said.

"They have them," Steve added.

"The corralling, it was getting us to those walkers."

"All to show us that they have them."

No one tried to argue, knowing that Carl and Steve were right. "What's that sound?" Sasha inquired, referring to the squealing from the RV.

"Undercarriage could've caught a bullet," Eugene said. "Or could be transmission. Could be nothing."

"They were firing at our feet," I said. "They blocked the road, but they weren't trying to stop us. They want us in this direction."

"Barton Road takes us north, but they gotta know we wanna go north," Sasha told us.

"Meadows," Eugene proposed. "Takes us east a piece but we can get back on track at Mayhew."

"We're down to a third of a tank. We could top off at the next stop, but no refills after that."

I nodded my approval, and Aaron pushed past them. "Rick, she's burning up," he said.

"Rick!" Abraham called, and I moved up as he brought the RV to a stop. This time, more Saviors blocked the road, more than ever before. Nearly three dozen, easy. And that was just the ones we could see.

"Go back," I ordered.

"Where? There's nowhere left to run."

Morgan

I only found her again because of the gunshot. The first time I found her, it was an accident. I found the man's horse, and I found Carol outside a library, a stab wound in her side. I did what I could, but she needed stitches. Then, when I went to take care of a walker making a lot of noise, she left. I continued on, trying to find her. Then, I heard a gunshot, and, wondering if it was her, I took off towards it. As I neared the origin of the gunshot, I heard another one, followed by a faint scream. I was close, but still not there. As I neared a building, a woman's voice that I recognized as Carol's called, "What, are you done? Unless you kill me now, I'm not gonna die! You decide! The world doesn't decide! You do! You don't get to walk away and get what you want!"

I jumped down from my horse as a man, one that was walking away, turned around, raising his gun on Carol, who lied on the ground. "Stop," I commanded, raising the gun Rick gave me. "Drop it. You can survive this. You can. Drop it. Please."

"No," the man replied, finger moving to the trigger. I fired first, firing to protect my friend. I squeezed the trigger, and I didn't stop until he hit the ground. I dropped down beside Carol, seeing the wound in her leg first, and then her arm. As I applied pressure to her arm, she begged, "Will you please just let me go?"

"Hey, it's not your time," I told her. "You are gonna come back from this."

I turned as I heard a second horse approaching, only to find the man who lost his horse, a second man on a second horse behind him. He raised a hand to show he meant no harm, asking, "What happened here?"

"I found your horse," I told him. "Found my friend, too. She needs help."

The men looked at each other, and the one without the horse said, "Then, let's get you some help."

He held out a hand, which I shook, sealing the deal. These men may have been our saviors, but they're not part of the Saviors.

Rick

Yet again, we had to stop. This time because of logs blocking the road, and as we got out, we noticed tire tracks on the dirt road. "These tracks," Eugene said. "They would indicate that they not only have people, but some big-ass toys and capabilities."

"What it indicates is that we are neck-deep up shit creek with our mouths wide open," Abraham corrected.

We turned as there was a scream and chains rattling, only to find a man being dropped off the overpass. Aaron aimed his gun as the man, whom I recognized as the same man that wouldn't listen to the Saviors, gagged, clawing at the chain around his neck. "Don't," Abraham ordered.

"I can try and break the chain," Aaron said, not lowering his gun.

"It won't work."

"I can try."

"It won't work," I repeated. "And we need the bullets."

So we stood by, unable to help, as he choked to death. Steve looked down, unable to watch. I thought it was a bit odd, the soldier that served in World War II unable to watch a death. It wasn't until after that I realized that Steve couldn't watch because he swore to protect Americans, as well as the people of the rest of the world, and he was unable to do anything to save this man.

Behind us, the logs suddenly caught fire, and the same Savior from the first group called, "You're treating your people good, right? Like it was your last day on earth? Or maybe one of theirs? You better go. It's gonna get hot. You go get where you're going."

"Go," I commanded, and we rushed back to the RV. As soon as Abraham was behind the wheel, he backed up, away from the burning logs.

As Abraham drove off, Steve said, "I could've done something."

"There was nothing you could do," Carl told him.

"There was. I don't know why I didn't. I could've thrown my shield, broken the chain."

"It's too late now," I said. "And there was nothing you could've done back there. He was already dead. The Saviors would've killed him, one way or another."

On a side road in the woods, Abraham finally pulled to a stop, and we gathered around the table. "What's the play?" Abraham questioned.

"She needs a doctor," I said as I rejoined them after checking on Maggie.

"There are two more routes north from here," Sasha told us.

"They're probably waiting for us right now," Aaron chimed in.

"So they're ahead of us, probably behind us," Eugene said. "But they're not waiting on us, per se. They're waiting on this rust bucket. And they don't know the moment-to-moment occupancy of said rust bucket. And the sun sets soon."

Once the sun was set, we moved out, putting the rest of the gas into the RV and getting Maggie ready to move. I met Eugene by the door, telling him, "That's the last of it. You see a car, try to siphon some gas, but other than that, keep moving."

Eugene nodded. "I'll have them thinking we're playing their game. All phases of the turn, level after level, move after move, I'll keep them spun. I assure you, I will. I got something for you." He reached in his pocket, pulling out a piece of paper. "It's a recipe, and it ain't gazpacho. How to Build Bullets 101." He handed me the paper, telling me, "Abraham can show you where, just it case. Stark knows how. We were working on it together. They know everything you need to know, just in case."

I looked up at him. "Thank you for this. For all of it. We're lucky you're here."

"I won't argue with that," Eugene said, and I had to chuckle at that. I shook his hand, then walked away to allow Abraham speak with his friend.

"You go steady on the pedal," Abraham instructed him. "You don't make that thing gulp."

"How come you never let me drive the truck?" Eugene questioned.

"Quite honestly, I didn't think you could do it. I was wrong. You're a survivor. You always were. We just didn't know it. Me and you both."

Abraham held up a hand for him to shake, but Eugene bypassed it and went for the hug. I stepped inside the RV, helping Aaron get Maggie out on the cot we rigged up for us to carry her on. Eugene stepped over once we were out of the RV, and Maggie looked up at him. "Thank you," she told him.

"Not a problem," he replied, stepping back to allow us to pass.

Steve remained for a moment, clapping him on the shoulder. "You're a brave man, Eugene," he said. "Thank you."

Eugene's smile grew at the compliment from possibly the bravest person alive, Captain America himself, and he watched as we took off into the woods. Carl and Steve acted as our defense, staying in front to take out any walkers, while Abraham and I each took an end, carrying Maggie, and Sasha and Aaron walked on either side. As we continued on, I heard the RV starting behind us, and I hoped like hell the Saviors were stupid enough to fall for it.

Aaron

"Aaron, please, just let me walk it," Maggie pleaded as we continued through the forest.

"Relax," I told her. "Just a few more miles."

Rick and Steve switched their positions, allowing Rick to walk ahead with Carl. I could hear Carl saying, "I heard what you said when we were leaving. We can do anything, 'cause we'll do anything we need to do. We have and we will. What happened to Denise, I'm not gonna let anybody die like that again."

"Carl," Rick started.

"What?"

Before Rick could answer, however, eerie whistles rang out around us. Immediately, Rick and Steve switched again, allowing Steve to take the lead, as well as command. "Go," he ordered, gesturing with his head in one direction.

We kept going, running as fast as we could without jostling Maggie too much. Steve led the way, Carl, right behind him with his gun drawn, and the rest of us weren't far behind. The whistles kept getting louder, converging on us, and more frequent. We skidded to a halt in a clearing as a light turned on, momentarily blinding us. Steve put up his shield, covering both himself and Carl at the same time. And I knew that if I lived through this, the sound of every Savior whistling together, like the screech of an inhuman creature from a horror movie, would haunt me until the moment I die.

As we realized we were surrounded, we backed into a circle, closing around Maggie. We kept our backs to each other, facing the Saviors on every side. Dozens of men, all armed, surround us. Some grinned maliciously, some remained expressionless. Where the light came from, I saw Eugene on his knees, looking terrified and somewhat ashamed.

"Good," the Savior, the first one we met today, said, stepping forward. "You made it. Welcome to where you're going. We'll take your weapons." He aimed his gun at Carl, causing Steve to lift his shield. "Ah, ah." The Savior pulled out a second gun, aiming it at Steve. "Drop them. Now."

Rick, seeing the gun on his son, tried, "We can talk about—"

"We're done talking. Time to listen."

The Saviors moved forward in groups of two, taking our weapons and patting us down. Steve glared at the Savior that took his shield, the way Daryl would glare at anyone that touched his crossbow. The Savior that did all the speaking moved to take Carl's gun, looking down at it. "That's yours, right?" he questioned. He leaned down, looking in Carl's remaining eye. "Yeah, it's yours." He raised his hand, flicking the hat. Carl didn't flinch, didn't do anything, and I wondered if the Savior knew how much of a mistake he made. He straightened, looking around at the rest of us. "Okay. Let's get her down and get you all on your knees. Lots to cover."

Sasha and I moved to take a side, two of the Saviors joining, and Abraham snapped, "Hold it. We got it."

"Let 'em do it," the Savior commanded. We lowered Maggie down, careful not to drop her. Abraham and Rick helped her up, then helping her to her knees. Abraham stayed with her, while Eugene was dragged over and forced to his knees as well. No one else knelt. The Savior told Rick, "We're gonna need you on your knees." Rick shared a look with Steve, silently asking him what to do. I could tell that even after everything, this was one situation where Rick was out of his league, and he needed someone else. Rick looked around at the rest of us before nodding once, silently telling us to comply with the command. "Dwight!"

A blond stepped forward, asking, "Yeah?"

"Chop-chop. Bring 'em out."

We watched as Dwight and a few other Saviors dragged five of the six that left this morning out of a van, forcing them to their knees in the line up. Of them all, Glenn was the one that fought the most, asking, "Maggie?"

"On your knees," Dwight barked.

On my left, I heard Carl whisper, "Where's Clary?"

The youngest Dixon was the only one that wasn't there. She and Bucky left together that morning, so she had to be with him, right? Unless… No, don't think about that. She's not dead. My eyes drift to Bucky as he's put on his knees next to Glenn, at the end of the line, and I could see his eyes widen as he saw Steve and the rest of us. He didn't speak, but his lips still formed the words. You shouldn't be here.

The Savior chuckled, looking us over. "Looks like we got us a full boat. Time to meet the man."

He stepped back, knocking on the side of the RV. A sudden thought came to my head, and I prayed that it wasn't true. She wouldn't turn on us like that. As the door opened, I braced myself for two things: to finally meet the big bad we've heard so much about, and to face the ugly truth.

Bucky

The door of the RV swung open, and the first thing that I saw was the spotlight reflecting off of Clary's arm. She stepped out first, Negan right behind her. The group around me sucked in their breath, a couple of them shaking their heads. They refused to believe that Clary would be there, on Negan's side. They didn't know that it wasn't Clary standing there, but the Executioner in her place. Negan put Lucille on his shoulder, remaining in the shadows, as Clary stepped out of them. Her face was blank, completely void of emotion; but it changed when she saw Carl on his knees and Maggie in pain. She still remembers us. Oh, shit. From behind her, Negan questioned, "Pissing our pants yet?" He stepped around her, out into the light, and Clary followed closely behind. "Boy, do I have the feeling we're getting close." He paced the line up, looking down at each of us. As he passed me, he gave me a small smirk. "Yep, it's gonna be pee-pee pants city here real soon." He stopped near Steve, who was kneeling between Sasha and Aaron. "Now, which one of you pricks is the leader?" He looked down at Steve. "Is it you, Captain America?"

One of the Saviors pointed to Rick. "It's this one," he said. "He's the guy."

Negan stepped away from Steve, stopping in front of Rick. "Hi. You're Rick, right? The Executioner told me about you. I'm Negan. And I do not appreciate you killing my men. Also, when I sent my men to kill your men for killing my men, you killed more of my men. Not cool. Not fucking cool. You got no fucking idea how not fucking cool that shit is. But I imagine you'll be up to speed shortly, yeah. You are so gonna regret crossing me in a few minutes." He grinned. "Fuck yes, you will. You see, Rick, whatever you do… no matter what… you do not mess with the new world order. The new world order is this, and it's really very simple. So, even if you're fucking stupid, which you very may well be, you can understand it. You ready? Here goes. Pay attention." He took Lucille off of his shoulder, placing it right beside Rick's cheek, just enough so the barbed wire was nearly brushing him. Negan went to move the bat, and Rick jerked his his head up, eyes on the Saviors' leader. "Give me your shit, or I will kill you."

"Today was career day," Negan continued, taking Lucille away as he stepped back, looking around at my people. "We invested a lot so you would know who I am and what I can do. You work for me now. You have shit, you give it to me. That's your job. Now, I know that is a mighty fucking big, nasty pill to swallow, but swallow it you most certainly motherfucking will." Negan stepped back in front of Rick, looking down at him. "You ruled the roost. You built something. You thought you were safe. I get it. But the word is out. You are not safe. Not even fucking close. In fact, you're fucked. And more fucked if you don't do what I want. And what I want is half of your shit. And if that's too much, you can make, find, or steal more, and it'll even out sooner or later. This is your way of life now. The more you fight back, the harder it will be. So if someone knocks on your door… you fucking let us in. We own that door. You try to stop us, we'll fucking knock it the fuck down. Understand?"

Rick didn't speak.

"What, no answer? Well, you didn't really think you were going to get through this without getting punished, did you? I don't want to kill you people. Just want to make that clear from the get-go. I want you to work for me. You can't very well do that when you're fucking dead, now can you? I'm not growing a garden. But you killed my men. A fucking whole goddamn lot of them, too. More than I'm comfortable with. And for that, you gotta fucking pay. So now… I'm gonna beat the holy fuck fucking fuckedy fuck out of one of you with my bat. Who I call Lucille, for those that don't know. Lucille, as you can see, has barbed wire wrapped around the end of her." Negan laughed. "She's fucking awesome. All of this, it's just so we can pick out which one of you gets the honor."

"Executioner," Negan called out in a sing-song tone, and she stepped forward. He turned back to her, holding Lucille out. "Hold her." Clary took the bat, holding it on her shoulder like Negan did. He chuckled, seeing how obedient she was. "I like her. You guys gotta get one of them." He looked back at Rick. "Ooh, that's right. Your Winter Soldier was replaced, and I took the new and improved one. Oh, well. She's mine now." Daryl let out a huff, shifting on his knees, and I shook my head at him. I knew that if he tried anything, he was going to get himself killed doing it; and Negan wouldn't hesitate to make Clary be the one to do it. Negan paced our lineup again, stopping in front of Abraham. The former Sergeant rose on his knees to meet him, not flinching back. Negan chuckled, obviously impressed with either Abraham's bravery or stupidity. Even I didn't know which one it was. "Huh." He rubbed the salt and pepper stubble on his chin. "Ugh, I gotta shave this shit."

Negan made his way over to Carl next, and while he didn't rise like Abraham, Carl didn't flinch away. Steve straightened slightly, not enough to be noticed by Negan but enough that I still caught it. I remembered that he and Carl had bonded over the past couple of months, and he was protective over the boy.

"You got one of our guns," Negan said, kneeling in front of Carl. "You got a lot of our guns, according to my Executioner. Shit, kid. Lighten up. At least cry a little." He got to his feet, stopping by Maggie this time. "Jesus," he drawled out. "You look shitty. Executioner, maybe we should just put her out of her misery right now. What do ya think?"

"No!" Glenn shouted. "No!" Negan turned as Glenn scrambled to his feet, and I reached after him, but he just slipped out of reach right as Dwight knocked him down with a punch. Maggie let out a cry, especially when Dwight aimed Daryl's crossbow at her husband. Negan shook his head, saying, "Nope. Nope. Executioner, get him back in line."

Clary walked over, taking Glenn's arm and dragging him back to the line up. She hissed, "Do that shit again, and I'll have to kill you."

"Alright, listen," Negan said. "Don't any of you do that again. I will shut that shit down, no exceptions. First one's free. It's an emotional moment, I get it." Beside me, Glenn was shaking, nearly in tears. Clary still hadn't moved, was still standing over him, and I realized it was her trying to protect him. I told her that if it felt wrong, don't do it. And she was listening to me. She couldn't outright protect us, but if she could literally stand in Negan's way, it might do the trick. Negan looked down at Rick, who was shaking as much as Glenn, obviously terrified. "Sucks, don't it? The moment you realize you don't know shit." Rick's eyes darted towards Carl, who hadn't taken his eye off of Rick. Negan gestured towards Carl. "This is your kid, right?" He laughed. "This is definitely your kid!"

"Just stop this!" Rick barked.

"Hey!" Negan snapped. "Do not make me kill the little future serial killer, not before his story ends. Too fucking interesting. Don't make it easy on me. I've gotta pick somebody, and everybody's at the table waiting for me to order." Negan paced back and forth, looking at each of us in turn. "I simply cannot fucking decide."

We all glanced at each other, thinking for a moment that we were off the hook, before Negan laughed. "I've got an idea. Executioner, get back here. I gotta see everyone."

Clary complied, standing behind Negan with his bat on her shoulder. I noticed how Negan still hadn't taken Lucille back, and I realized in horror that he was going to make her kill whoever he chose. For a single, selfish moment, I thought, Please, don't let it be me.

Negan pointed to each of us in turn as he said, "Eenie… meenie… miney… mo… Catch… a tiger… by his toe… If… he hollers… let him go… My mother… told me… to pick… the very best one… and… you… are…"

Negan trailed off, making a show to pointing to each of us.

"It."

"Abraham," I whispered, watching as Negan chose the redhead.

"Executioner, get your ass up here," Negan ordered, and Clary stepped forward, taking Lucille off her shoulder as she stood over him. "You know what to do, but wait a second." Negan turned to the rest of us. "Now, a couple of rules before we get started. Anybody moves, anybody says anything, cut the boy's other eye out and feed it to his father. And then we'll start. You can breathe, you can blink, you can cry. Hell, you're all gonna be doing that."

Negan turned back to Clary, nodding once. Go ahead. She shook, hesitating as she shifted Lucille in her hands.

"Clary," Abraham said, looking up as she stood over him. "Clary, it's alright." He rose on his knees once again, holding his head high. "It was gonna be one of us anyway. Don't hold back, little missy. Never hold back." Abraham turned to Negan. "And you… you can suck my nuts."

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sarge," Clary said, then swung. Abraham got back up, not wanting to go out any way but standing proud, even if he was on his knees."I'll see you in another life, brother." She swung again, trying to end it as quickly as possible. "I remembered you."

It was only when Abraham stopped twitching that Clary stopped. Sasha was in tears, Rosita shaking. Hell, we were all shaking, nearing tears. "Did you hear that?" Negan laughed. "He said, 'suck my nuts.'" He put his arm around Clary, looking down at Lucille. "Oh my goodness!" He took the bat from her, swinging it around. Abraham's blood splattered onto Rick's cheek, running down it into his beard. "Look at this! You guys, look at my dirty girl!" Negan leaned down, whispering something in Clary's ear as he gave her back Lucille. Clary stepped over to Rosita, Negan following behind her. "Sweetheart, lay your eyes on this." Clary looked away as she put Lucille in Rosita's face, forcing her to look at the weapon she used to kill the man Rosita loved. Negan looked from Rosita to Abraham's body, noticing how shaken she was. "Oh, damn. Were you… were you together? Executioner, were they together?"

"As far as I know," Clary answered. "I was gone for three months. Shit happens, times change."

"That sucks. But if you were, you should know there was a reason for all this." Negan stepped away from Clary, back towards the center of the lineup. "Red, and hell he was, is, and will ever be red. He just took one or six or seven for the team! So take a damn look." Rosita still wouldn't look at the bat. "Alright, that's fine. Executioner, you know what to do."

"You leave her alone!" Daryl shouted, scrambling to his feet. He knocked Lucille out of Clary's hand, knocking her to the ground in his haste, and socking Negan in the jaw. Negan stumbled back with the force of the blow, and Saviors rushed forwards, subduing Daryl before he could swing again. They got him on the ground after the Saviors threw a couple punches, and Clary got to her feet, picking up Lucille. She stood over Daryl, Lucille hovering over him, with Abraham's blood dripping on his face.

Before Clary could speak, Negan pushed around her, snapping, "No! Oh, no." He stepped backwards, putting his hand on Clary's back and pushing her forwards. "Keep him down, Executioner." He looked to Daryl. "That? Oh, my! That is a no-no." He stepped around Clary again, kneeling beside her brother. "The whole thing! Not one bit of that shit flies here."

That's when Dwight ran up, aiming Daryl's crossbow at its previous owner. He asked, "Do you want me to do it? Right here?"

Negan took a fistful of Daryl's hair, studying him for a moment as he continued to struggle against the Savior holding him down. Negan looked back up at Dwight. "No. No, you don't kill them. Not until you try a little." Dwight stood down, and he gave the other two Saviors a hand in dragging Daryl back to his place in line. Negan rose, and Clary dropped back behind him. She looked down, hiding her face in shame from the rest of us. "And anyway… that's not how it works. Now, I already told you people. First one's free. Then what'd I say? I said I would shut that shit down! No exceptions. Now, I don't know what kind of lying assholes you've been dealing with, but I'm a man of my word." At that phrase, Clary slowly lifted her head. She met my eyes, both of us realizing that this, too, was a lie. "I mean, you can't always keep it, because shit happens. But you can do your damn well best. And first impressions are important. I need you to know me. So… back to it, my dear Executioner." Clary stood to attention, shifting the bloodied Lucille in her hands. "Him."

I turned away from Clary, only to see Negan pointing towards us. For a moment, I thought he was pointed at me. Then, I realized he wasn't. My heart stopped as I realized he was pointing at Glenn, the Korean's eyes widening in horror. Clary shook her head. "Not him."

Negan took his bat from Clary's hands, pushing her to the ground behind him. Negan's men surrounded her, guns drawn, to ensure she didn't get up while he turned and swung the bat on Glenn. I flinched back, Glenn's blood spraying across my face, Maggie letting out a scream. Like Abraham, Glenn rose, moaning as he tried to form words. In all my years, in all the horrible things that I've done, I've never seen anything as horrifying as what I saw that night. Negan leaned down in front of him, asking, "Buddy, you still there? I just don't know. It seems like you're trying to speak, but you just took a hell of a hit! I just popped your skull so hard, you eyeball just popped out! And it is gross as shit!"

"M-M-Maggie, I'll find you," Glenn finally managed.

Negan straightened, looking to Maggie. "Oh," he said softly. "Oh, hell. I can see this is hard on you guys. I am sorry. I truly am. But I did say it. No exceptions!"

Negan spun, swinging, and Glenn's blood sprayed across my face yet again. Glenn didn't get back up that time, but it didn't matter to Negan. He just kept on swinging. Even after Glenn stopped twitching, after he was long dead, Negan kept on swinging. Until there was nothing left.

"You lying sack of shit!" Clary yelled, but she knew better than to attack him. "You said you'd let them go!"

"I was going to," Negan replied, turning away from Glenn. He pointed to Rick. "But he pissed me and my men off. So, yeah, it was going to be just one of you. Just the ginger. But you didn't follow the rules."

When I was with Hydra, they would wipe me if I broke the rules. In the beginning, I'd beg them not to. It was useless. They did it anyway. And in that moment, I found myself wishing that they would make me forget.