Rinoa
Instead of immediately attending to important SeeD matters we wound up in Timber's only pub where Quistis and Selphie seemed excited to play a game of pool, something I never would have pegged the two girl for.
"How do I play," I asked, forcing excitement. I was interested in learning, but my brain was buzzing with terribly mean thoughts. I know they're a part of the curse, but it's so hard not to believe them.
"Well there are rules and regulations-" Quistis began before getting cut off by Selphie.
"Just aim the white ball at the other balls! Just not the eight ball, cause that will end the game."
"Oh," I furrowed my brows as I watched Zell break the balls apart, one of the striped and two solids knocked themselves into the pockets while the others dispersed over the table. Selphie jumped up and down before positioning almost her entire body on the table to shoot one of the stripped balls into another pocket. She missed by just a hair, causing the ball to bounce backwards and knock into some of the other balls. I resolved myself to do my best to shoot something in while Quistis went off to order our drinks.
I failed miserably, but Selphie still cheered me on saying that it takes time to get better. I nodded once before leaning against the wall to study Irvine and Squall. I could have eaves dropped on their conversation, but I just didn't have it in me. I was stretching my powers too much as it was recently anyway.
So instead of eaves dropping I simply studied them. Well, Squall really. He was very handsome, even when he was scowling. Why does he scowl so much anyway?
"Here, drink up," Quistis handed me a drink before liberating my pool cue to hand me a different one. "That one is better balanced, you'll be able to hit things easier with it." I nodded as I watched her lean over the table. Quistis was lithe and poised and strong. The perfect SeeD. She even made hitting a ball into a pocket look graceful.
Maybe if I was more like her I would be worthy of Squall.
I frowned at the thought and sipped tentatively on the red drink in my hand. It was sweet with the bitter taste of alcohol lingering well after it was swallowed. The burning voices in my head dulled only a little, giving me enough time to concentrate on maneuvering the cue stick to hit the ball.
As I was poised to strike Selphie decided to speak.
"So Squalls been studying you all night," her voice was almost a pur as I hit the white ball a bit too hard, sending it jumping off the table and rolling towards the bar. Zell took it upon himself to retrieve the ball while I tried drowning the question with booze.
"He has been glancing over here fairly often. Maybe Irvine's talking him up to something?" Quistis tilted her head as she studied the young leader. I forced myself to look anywhere but the topic of conversation.
"He probably thinks I'm annoying," I frowned while studying a couple dancing in the corner by the juke box. My face heated a bit as Selphie laughed.
"He thinks Zell is annoying, and no one is as bad as him."
"I resent that," Zell frowned causing his eyebrows to dip in the center of his forehead. " 'sides, it's about time our leader took interest in someone. Can't be healthy to stick to yourself all the time."
"So how's library girl doing?" Quietist leaned against the table, taking the attention of Squall and myself. I motioned for a waitress to fill my cup while Zell sputtered trying to find an answer.
Zell muttered something about 'too busy for romance' before taking a shot at the pool table while Selphie and Quistis refused to let him off the hook so easily. It was nice, watching them all interact. They were like siblings.
'You'll never truly belong.' 'Who would want something like you as a part of their family?' 'If Caraway knew he'd willingly throw you out.'
My grip on the pool cue caused my knuckles to go white as I pushed the thoughts to the back of my head, refusing to give in.
'There has to be some way to get rid of this thing without forcing it on someone else,' I furrowed my brows in thought as my mostly empty cup was replaced with a full one.
I took a drink without thinking, only vaguely noticing the static feeling in my head as the voices seemed to drown themselves out. 'Whoever did this to Squall was trying to tear him apart slowly, to bring his self worth so low he wouldn't be able to really lead or fight.'
Edea.
The name bounced around my head as I passed my cue to Quistis so she could shoot for me. My head felt light as the revelation seemed to dawn on me. Unless she had some weaker sorceress under her thumb to do the work for her there was no one in recent history that would vying for Squall to be down for the count, and what better way to do it than have him tear himself apart?
It was a genius plan.
But I definitely wasn't going to let her get away with it.
Squall
"Absolutely not," I growled out as Irvine began pleading his case over why it was absolutely necessary for the 'pampered princess' to 'return to her kingdom' and 'retrieve important whatevers.' The fact that he didn't even know what it was that she needed so desperately from her cushiony jail cell didn't really sell his point.
"Come on, this is an easy mission. You don't even need all of us here. Just send her with Zell and they'll be back before you even notice she's gone." Irvine leaned back in his chair. He brought a beer up to his mouth with all the intentions of drinking it until he froze for a moment, a terribly wicked smile spreading across his face. "Unless you would very much notice she was gone. You've been very chummy with her recently."
"She's the only one here that hasn't been bothering me for years."
"Of course that is the only explanation as to why you would be seen flirting with her on more than one occasion." I narrowed my eyes at the man wearing the stupid cowboy hat.
"I don't flirt."
"Normally, no. You stumble over words and scowl a lot. But with her," Irvine pointed his beer towards the girl attempting to play pool with an over-enthusiastic Selphie and a clinical Quistis. Zell stood back a couple feet, leaning on his pool cue with a dazed expression on his face as Rinoa continued to attempt to line up her shot. He looked bored, but that was merely a cover. His eyes were alert, scanning the crowd for anyone stupid enough to bother them. "With her, you smile, and allow her to wear your jacket and I believe I heard you chuckle at one point." I was frowning as I turned back to Irvine, annoyed that he was studying me so intently.
"What's your point?"
"She flirts back. And if you gave her the opportunity to go to her home and gather up a few of her belongings she might even warm up to you a little faster."
"You're not going to drop this, are you?"
"Just send Zell and maybe myself with her and she'll be safer than the entire population of Galbadia currently thinks it is."
I clenched the bridge of my nose before sighing. With what I hoped was a fluid motion I brought my own beer up to my lips and drained it.
"I'll take her myself. Quistis can handle all of this," I motioned towards the entirety of Timber. "We'll be back in two days. Any later than that and you finish this mission and send two people to come retrieve us."
"Can't let her out of your sight, hmm?"
"She's my charge, even if Zell thinks he's responsible for her."
"Normally I'd give you some sort of talk about how you think the world rests on your shoulders and you can't save everyone, but you're right this time. So don't mess it up." Irvine's feet dropped to the ground and his boots clicked on the floor as he made his way to the pool table. He relieved Rinoa of her pool cue and motioned towards me. She seemed reluctant to part with the piece of wood, and the reason became evident as she stumbled towards me. Her eyes were dark and glassy as she studied me a moment before claiming Irvine's seat as her own. She swung her feet back and forth as she motioned for the bartended to fill her cup up with whatever she was imbibing in tonight.
"I was summoned?" She finally questioned towards me and I sighed.
"I'll be taking you to Caraway's tomorrow." I almost growled out the words in annoyance, but the smile that graced her face made me glad I hadn't. If she knew how reluctant I was to allow her to even step foot in Galbadia as a country, let alone its capitol city, then I wouldn't have been treated to such a dazzling smile.
"Thank you so much!" she continued beaming as she picked up her cup delicately and began sipping on the red tinted liquid inside.
"Celebrating a little hard tonight?" I asked as she leaned heavily back and downed the cup without taking a breath.
"The voices won't go away," she frowned at her cup before setting it back on the bar. She seemed to still a few moments later as she seemed to process that she had let important information slip.
"Ah," was all I said in response before motioning to the bartender to give us each another. I had been fortunate not to have felt the dark thoughts that normally suffocated me for almost an entire day.
"How do you deal with them?" Rinoa turned to me expectantly and I frowned.
"Much like you are now, I suppose."
"This isn't as fun as last night," Rinoa leaned forward, her arms supporting her body on the bar. She looked paler than normal, and she was shivering slightly.
"You know, heavy drinking is usually frowned upon during SeeD missions," I mused as she folded her arms on the bar and turned her head to face me, looking very miserable.
"I'm not a SeeD," she sighed out.
"Well if you decide to join us on future missions you will have to obey the rules just like everyone else.
"Maybe I should have stayed home." She groaned out, her foot tapping restlessly on the barstool.
"In Deiling City?"
"Garden," she shook her head a little violently, which she immediately regretted if the flushed look on her face was anything to go off of.
"I'm glad you think of Garden as a home." I felt myself smiling as I reached for my fresh beer. Rinoa shrugged before reaching for her cup. Her finger traced the lip of the glass as she seemed to be deciding something. I left her be as I mulled over how I was going to explain to Cid that I had disappeared in the middle of a mission to attend to 'personal matters.'
"After my mom died Caraway's mansion stopped feeling like home and started feeling more like a prison every day." Rinoa finally sighed out before pushing her cup away. "I think I've had enough tonight."
"Want me to have someone walk you back?"
"I'm sure I can find my way. I know this place like the back of my hand," her smile was weak as she pushed herself into a standing position and began making her way to the exit. I sighed before downing my last bottle of the night and following her out of the bar. One of the others would cover the tab before they left.
Rinoa was staggering in front of me and mumbling to herself, almost as if she was arguing with an invisible spectre. My heart clenched, remembering all the nights I had fought with myself, trying to justify my deeds against their terrible outcomes. I frowned as Rinoa almost tripped over her feet and let out a few expletives before she looked over her shoulder. Her glassy eyes brightened for a moment before she scowled and mumbled again. I shook my head at her before closing the distance between us, offering her my arm to keep herself steady.
She studied it for a long moment before grabbing my forearm and leaning on me. The smell of alcohol was more apparent out in the fresh air, but underneath I could smell her perfume mixed with my cologne from her wearing my jacket earlier. It was an interesting mix of flowery and musky. I kept the thought to myself as we walked in relative silence.