A/N: And switching back to thiefshipping now! I'm trying to balance it out a bit but it's easier said than done. I really like this chapter, because cuddling is one of the best things ever invented *cough* hint *cough*. It makes me so happy in real life and even just writing about it ~_^*
Disclaimer: Not Mine!
While Ryou remembered, it left Malik alone with his confusing thoughts. Sometimes it felt like he didn't know anything at all about himself. Well, no, he did know something.
He knew he had a crush on Bakura.
He knew Bakura often went through flirtatious moments that were always directed towards him, but he also knew Bakura wasn't really a 'relationship' kind of guy.
What he didn't know...there was a lot of things he didn't know but the most pressing at the moment was whether or not this was just a passing fancy, the need to experiment that a lot of teenagers went through, or something more.
Truthfully he was starting to suspect that he really was gay, for Bakura at least, but he was hesitant to put his heart on the line for the Thief King, not to mention his sexuality. Making out was great and all, but was Bakura even capable of liking someone in a deeper than physical way?
He had denied it before. Was the case still the same?
The make out with Mariku said it was.
The way he got pissed off earlier said it wasn't.
Over all, Malik had no idea whatsoever. He couldn't see Bakura hesitating to break his heart if he accepted his feelings for the other boy and the Thief King didn't return them.
"Things have been better since we started spending more time together...but it's so hard to know whether or not I can really trust him." Ryou's sad comment fell so in line with Malik's own internal musings that he wondered for a moment if Ryou could sense his thoughts.
"I know the feeling," Malik muttered in a bitterly sympathetic way and Ryou gave him a strange look, probably wondering what he was referring to, but chose to let it go. He wasn't the type of person that liked to push into other people's personal affairs, something Malik was extremely grateful for.
It was a nice break from the bossy attitudes of his crush and his older brother.
"I want to trust him though," Ryou added in a hopeful tone, blowing out his breath in a small thoughtful huff. Malik made a small sound of insecure agreement, not so sure on that one. He supposed some of him wanted to trust Bakura with his feelings.
The whole situation just seemed so shaky...and this was his first 'boy crush'. Not to mention they hadn't even known each other that long. The whole thing was a mess and his personal insecurities hardly helped the situation.
Seeking some comfort he asked, "Why do you have so much trouble trusting Mariku anyways? It's not all about the bullying thing is it?"
Please, please, someone be able to offer at least a little insight. What do I do? Can I really trust him? Can I trust me? Ryou opened his mouth slightly, looking at Malik nervously, and then looked away again.
"I...there's been plenty of stuff. I'll get over it one day," he finally said in a forced cheerful tone, those innocent eyes seeming to be drowning in the smothered anxiety that Malik had long since gotten used to looking for.
He continued to watch the whitette who looked like a perfectly innocent, happy, normal guy as he stepped up to the booth, chatting with the girl standing there who beamed at him brightly before handing over his popcorn.
Ryou took a second one and handed it over to Malik who thanked him, but even to his own ears it sounded wooden as he observed the other boy. He couldn't help wondering how he hid his anxiety so well. Malik wished he could do that.
As it was, he could see the amusement in Bakura's smirk when his own personal confusion got too hard to conceal.
Sighing, he dragged his feet back over to the bleachers, feeling his insides react when he saw that Bakura hadn't moved an inch from earlier. Finally he simply had to ask someone even if it was Ryou who had just as many problems as he did.
"Do you really think he...you know...likes me, likes me?" He questioned nervously, observing Bakura silently who was still glaring out at the field while the football players started to file back out. Ryou glanced at him and smiled, a real smile this time, and thankfully not as patronizingly as some people might have.
"I'm his twin, but I can't read his mind. Still, you should know, he's never treated anyone the way he treats you before. Just look at the way he's sulking! I've never seen him so upset over something so little before," Ryou laughed quietly, looking at his brother fondly.
Seeing Bakura pout was disturbingly wrong but also kind of cute at the same time in a strange way. Malik sighed, liking the sound of that and yet finding it hard to believe. What would it take to convince himself?
Probably Bakura confessing to his face that he really 'liked him, liked him' which wasn't likely to happen.
"You know if I were you," Ryou started innocently, turning to face him with wide eyes, "And I maybe wanted to know if I possibly had feelings for someone who might like me back a lot, but I wasn't entirely sure yet and that person wasn't extremely happy with me at the moment, I might try to make it up to that person sooner rather than later. You never know, it could help me understand his...or her...feelings for me a little better, and maybe my feelings to."
Malik gave him a disbelieving look at the rather translucent analogy, getting a grin and a wink for his efforts before Ryou all but skipped back to his seat, wiggling past Bakura who didn't even glance his way.
Malik glanced at the warm popcorn in his arms, then at Bakura and the open spot beside him that Malik had been formerly occupying. Giving it some thought and feeling his brain simply turning in circles again he finally pushed all coherent thought away and just went with what he was feeling –and what he was feeling was cold and lonely and wanting some attention from his crush.
Walking over cautiously, he hesitated beside Bakura who stubbornly avoided his gaze though his scowl grew a little more pronounced. A cheer came from the crowd and Malik knew it was time to make his move if he was going to at all.
Glancing at the field once more he promptly plunked himself down to perch on Bakura's knees, forcing the whitette to sit up straighter, making a sound of surprise at the sudden motion.
"I would have thought you were used to guys randomly dropping into your lap by now," Malik commented with a smirk, the expression only growing when he saw the way Bakura glared at him darkly, struggling to fold his arms without touching Malik's back that was mere inches from him.
"I haven't had any guys in my lap for quite awhile now for your information," he muttered, leaning away from the blond who was wrecking havoc inside his body without even trying, simply by sitting in his lap. Malik just munched his popcorn nonchalantly, looking smug. Finally he tossed his new 'chair' a cheeky smile, feeling relief flutter up inside him.
"Stop being so pissy and just enjoy the game," he said lightly, turning to face the field again before taking a deep breath and wriggling back in Bakura's lap so that his back pressed to his crushes rather firm and way too attractive chest.
Those silly butterfly feelings churned excitedly in the pit of his stomach, unable to dislike the implications, whether they were true or not, that Bakura hadn't been 'with' anyone since he started acting affectionate towards Malik.
Besides, he was surprisingly warm for someone who had been acting so cold, and Malik could feel every inch of hesitant surprise in his body language.
After a long moment of struggling to figure out whether or not Malik was being serious or not, Bakura decided not to let the opportunity go by. Leaning into his smaller figure, he wound his arms around his Egyptian's waist tightly from behind, cuddling their bodies together.
To his surprise, rather than stiffening up Malik relaxed, giving a small relieved sigh that he couldn't quite muffle.
"You're fucking cold, I should have known you had an ulterior motive," Bakura grumbled in his own accepting way and Malik shivered appreciatively in response.
"Of course," Malik replied in a casually sarcastic tone, slowly unclenching the muscles in his legs so that he could lay back, fully supported by Bakura's arms and chest. For the record, Bakura made zero complaints about the position, seeming perfectly content and maybe even happy this way.
"Can you see alright?" Malik asked quietly, feeling Bakura shifting behind him.
"Hm," was all he got in response, followed by Bakura's chin coming to rest on his shoulder. Malik turned his head slightly to the right and found himself face to face with two deep bloody brown eyes that stared into his lavender gaze unflinchingly.
Malik quickly looked back to the field, feeling heat rise up in his cheeks in what was probably a very obvious blush as he realized just how close together they were. Bakura confirmed this suspicion with a small chuckle right by his ear, making Malik blush harder, though at the moment he couldn't find a reason to regret sitting where he did.
Bakura was like an old familiar blanket, wrapped around him all cuddly and warm, something he never thought he'd connect Bakura with, but the sensation was all together there. Reaching down with only brief hesitation he grabbed Bakura's hands so that he could pull the usually harsh whitette's arms tighter around him, increasing the comforting sensation.
Bakura felt Malik coaxing him to hold him tighter and was too surprised to react for a moment, then gladly tightened his grip, hugging him even closer. There was no denying the way they were pressed together now and Bakura for one was grateful that at least for now Malik wasn't denying the way things were between them.
He knew better than to think it would last, it was dangerous to even get comfortable in his new position but the sensation of the smaller boys body so tightly in his arms just the way he wanted it wasn't something he was willing to give up that easily. He wanted him and, at least for now, he had him.
All thoughts of cherishing the moment while it lasted increased tenfold when one of the football players broke away from their huddle long enough to look up at the stands. Pulling off his helmet, it became obvious from all the wild blond hair that the person was Mariku and he was glaring directly at Bakura.
Obviously seeing Bakura cuddling his extremely willing little brother wasn't part of his 'game plan'. Bakura grinned hugely just to get on his nerves and Mariku flipped him off, waving his fist with its protruding digit proudly in the air. He shouted something that sounded distinctly like 'Fuck you 'Kura!'
Returning the rude symbol, Bakura shouted back, "Right back at you babe!" Ryou burst into a fit of giggles and Malik couldn't help laughing as well, mostly at the sound of Bakura using a word like babe. Somehow he made even that sound biting and witty.
Still laughing helplessly, Malik blew his brother a large kiss just to rub it in, giving Bakura an immense amount of smug satisfaction. Ryou frowned, leaning over to smack them both over the head firmly, bringing protests from their dying smirks.
"That's for distracting him from his game, on his birthday to!" Ryou chastised before turning to wave at Mariku cheerfully who blew him a kiss that made him blush even from across the field.
"That actually hurt," Malik whined, rubbing his head gingerly and Bakura removed one arm from around his waist to push his hand away impatiently, rubbing soothing circles across the place Ryou had smacked. In contrast to the gentle Touzoku's violent act, Bakura was being strangely...nice.
Malik was suspicious for a second but it just felt so damn good that he couldn't help but lean into the gentle touch. Bakura's other hand left his waist, coming up to trail across his shoulder and begin rubbing deeply when he found a tender spot.
He noted that the effeminate boy's shoulders were much too broad and manly for a girl's in comparison to the rest of his 'girly' physique. Malik let out an involuntary moan as Bakura hit another sweet spot on his back, then immediately snapped his mouth shut in embarrassment.
Ignoring the arousing sound as best he could given current circumstances, Bakura began running his fingers through surprisingly thick white blond hair. Such a curious color against that golden skin...Malik relaxed again, snuggling back against his chest affectionately and pulling his free arm back around his waist eagerly.
Bakura continued to stroke his hair absentmindedly, trying to ignore the fact that when Malik cuddled closer and tilted his head like that it put his neck at the perfect angle for some well placed hickies that Bakura would have gladly given him.
Not mine, Bakura reminded himself firmly, it seems like it right now but he's not mine...not yet anyways. That was something that needed to change though, very, very soon.
"Ne, Malik? I have an idea..."
A/N: What plan might that be? These two need to stop meddling in the Deathshipping...although it makes it that much more fun to write about ;)