Chapter Fourteen: Awkward Moments

For the spring holidays, Fiyero and Elphaba again visited Nest Hardings, though Elphaba wasn't too excited about it. However, at the suggestion they visit Fiyero's family instead (which they would have to do over the summer, anyway), she suddenly became quite set on seeing her own family.

It was a bit uncomfortable at first. Frex realized just as they arrived that all of the beds were single beds. He offered to help push the two twin beds in Elphaba's room together, but Fiyero stupidly said, "We'll be fine in a small bed. It's more… uh, yeah, uh… small." Fiyero gave Elphaba a look that clearly said "please don't hurt me" and then shut his mouth.

"He just means… well, actually, I don't know what he means, but we'll be fine, Father." Elphaba attempted to clear things up.

Frex didn't say anything to that. "Well, get yourselves settled. Did you have dinner on the train?"

"Yes."

"Okay. It's about time for bed, anyway. We'll talk in the morning."

Elphaba fell asleep instantly, barely having unpacked enough to change. Fiyero finished unpacking and got into bed next to her, wide awake. He was not sure why, but he didn't feel the least bit tired. For a long time, he watched Elphaba, half on her side, half on her stomach, facing away from him, breathing shallowly as she slept. Impulsively (he always did this while she slept, but she never knew it – if she did, she'd have killed him), he twirled her hair around his fingers and ran his hands through it.

There was a noise from the kitchen and Fiyero's attentions were drawn to it immediately. What if it were some kind of criminal? He should go out and at least see who it was. Fiyero didn't bother to dress.

Cautiously, he tiptoed down the hall and towards the kitchen. A form rifled through the cabinets, but Fiyero couldn't tell if it was anyone who lived in the house or not. Without thinking too much, he flipped on a light.

Frex whirled around, catching a shout in his throat. He stared at Fiyero for a moment, then shuddered and turned away. "Were you hungry?"

"No. I was just making sure it was just you in the kitchen. I… I didn't fall asleep right away, is all."

"And Elphaba's asleep?"

"Yes, why wouldn't she be?"

Frex had once again turned towards Fiyero and raised his eyebrows.

It was only then that Fiyero realized he was standing in the doorway of the kitchen naked. "Oh! No, I… we… sleep like this all of the time. It's more comfortable."

"Um, all right then. If you'll excuse me, I'm just going to take this glass of water and head back to my room." Frex did not want to walk to close to Fiyero.

Fiyero got the message. "Right. I'll, uh, go back to bed."

Elphaba looked up when Fiyero came back in the room. "What were you doing? I heard voices." After gazing at Fiyero for a long moment, she asked, "And what were you doing talking to someone naked?"

"I forgot to dress. I heard a noise, that's all."

"Let me guess, with our luck, you ended up running into either Nessa or my father."

"You're good."

"Which one?"

"Your father."

"Oh, that's rich." Elphaba muttered.

"I explained that we always sleep naked."

"That helps so much." Elphaba replied sarcastically. "You have a knack for saying the most awkward things, did you know that?"

"But…"

"Just don't before you say something else."

Fiyero sighed. He pulled Elphaba closer to him and kissed her warmly. "I love you, though. Is that awkward?"

She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck. "It depends how you mean it."

Later, Elphaba was sitting in bed with Fiyero, arms folded across her chest. It was almost morning. He said, "I'm sorry."

"How the hell do you forget that?"

"I forgot."

"You just forgot to close the damned door when we're having sex and in my family's house and anyone, as someone did, may walk by? Nanny is never going to let me forget that!"

"I figured no one would hear us?" He pleaded.

"Even if it weren't for the bedsprings, I'm sure loud panting and vigorous movement, no matter how quiet, might've caught her ear." Elphaba snapped.

"She's old."

"Anyone could've walked by!"

"At least it wasn't my family," he reminded her.

"They've seen us anyway," she mumbled, "maybe it'd be less awkward. You just have to get us in the worst situations, don't you?"

Breakfast was eaten in utter silence. One of the chairs had been broken (Shell had tried to jump up and down on it) and so Elphaba sat in Fiyero's lap uneasily as they ate from the same plate. He had to wrap his arm around her waist to keep her from falling off of the chair.

"So," Nanny said, just before the plates had been removed, "how was everyone's night?"

Elphaba sipped her tea coolly and said, "It was fine."

"I'm sure. When you're a married couple and can have sex every night, I'm sure that improves the quality of one's night."

"Nanny!" Nessa was horrified. "That is not your business."

"It shouldn't be. But sometimes one doesn't choose when something is one's business because people leave doors open." Nanny responded tersely.

Elphaba stood up quickly and glared at Fiyero. "I'll do the dishes."

"You can't, you're allergic to the damn water!" Frex spat.

"Oh. Well, I'll… I'll at least put them in the sink." She swiftly took the plate from in front of Fiyero, which he was still eating off of, as well as Nessa, Nanny, Shell and Frex's and disappeared into the kitchen. Fiyero tried to smile awkwardly. "That was my fault, last night."

Shell laughed immaturely. He was hitting puberty and sex was simply hilarious to him. Everyone gave him a bad look, but he couldn't help it.

Elphaba came back into the room. "I think Fiyero and I will go for a walk this morning. It looks lovely outside."

Fiyero and Elphaba took many walks during that trip.

"I don't know why I forgive you for all of the silly things you do."

"It's because you love me." Fiyero answered, taking her hand and kissing it.

"I think it's more than that. Even though I do love you, darling, I don't think that would stop me from being angry with you on occasion."

"It must be sex then," Fiyero decided.

Elphaba cocked her head and looked at him.

"Well, you're mad, and you love me, and you want to be mad, but then we have sex and it's so good you just can't be mad anymore."

"Thank you, Captain Ego." Elphaba rolled her eyes. "You think you're so incredible in bed, don't you?"

Fiyero's eyes widened. "Are you saying I'm not?"

"I don't want to have a conversation that consists of me stroking your ego."

"How about you stroke my…"

"Fiyero!"

"Come on, Fae, talk to me or I'll… I'll say something awkward in front of Shell."

Elphaba groaned. "Fine, you're amazing in bed. Happy?"

"No. Tell me why."

"What has gotten into you?"

"I know what's gotten into you, many, many good, steamy times."

"Fiyero, what in Oz is wrong with you right now?"

"I guess I'm a little excited."

"We're in the middle of a clearing outside; we're not having sex."

"I just asked you to talk."

"Fine. What makes it so good? I'm not sure I can explain. For one thing, you never hurt me. You're always gentle, unless I ask you not to be. There are times when I like being a little… rough and you're up for that, too. You focus so much on satisfying me and you do it very well."

"How?"

Elphaba looked like she was ready to kill him, yet she continued. "You've got this way of moving that just rubs me in all the right ways, touches me in all the right places. It's like we fit perfectly…almost. Sometimes I feel like it's a pretty damn tight fit, but I like it that way."

"So do I."

"Damn it, you've gotten me all… well…" She blushed.

"That's what I hoped."

"Not on the dirty ground!" She snapped.

"Mmmm, but Fae, that's what our clothes are for. We won't be using them for anything else…"

"That's just what I need, a semen stain all over my black dress." She turned and walked away.

He followed. "Okay, I'm a little aroused right now. I'm sorry."

"You're acting like a sex-crazed animal!" Elphaba headed back towards the house, raging.

"You could relieve it and I'd stop."

"That's it!" Elphaba stopped in front of the house. "We've been married six months and I know, love, that newly married couples are very passionate, but all it is with you is sex."

Fiyero had suddenly lost his sexual appetite for the moment. "That's not all it is."

"It seems like it."

"I… I'm sorry."

"Not enough," Elphaba flung open the door of the house, rushed in to her room and curled up on her bed, locking the door.

And so was the beginning of their first major fight as a married couple.