Thursday, June 5th, 2014
…
Hisako stared at the whiteboard just to have something to do. She woke up and went to school, both feats of which she would have thought impossible the night before. Suzuka had come to class, too, already seated, with her head buried in her arms. She could have been asleep.
It would be another day of class. Many seats were still empty, that early in the morning, but at least one would remain that way. She hoped Yuri would stay at home, too.
"No one knows yet," Suzuka mumbled into her arms.
"They'll know soon." There would probably be a school announcement, and then they could at least stop trying to maintain straight faces in class. More students filed in, classmates or friends visiting friends. Hisako wasn't sure what she'd do if someone tried to sit in Mika's seat.
She already felt numb. The actual grief was gone, temporarily, and it was all she could do to appear aware of her surroundings. Lectures and notes would be beyond her, but at least her attendance would count for something. Maybe once everyone knew—no, she should keep doing things. Hisako knew she was the type of person to just shut down if given the chance; she had to keep active, keep pretending at normal habits if nothing else.
It would be better once everyone knew, in a terrible way. She had to believe that.
Mathias arrived, early as usual. She tracked his movements out of some sort of reflex. When he caught sight of the two girls, however, his expression changed in a strange way. He quickly looked away after catching her eye.
He sat down next to them, but in Haruka's, not Mika's. He didn't say anything at first, leaning forward, squinting a little bit. Analyzing.
Suzuka raised her head up high enough to make sure her glare was visible. Hisako glanced between them, nervousness bubbling beneath the weight of everything else.
Mathias opened his mouth, and closed it again with another thoughtful frown. Then he tried again, and asked, "Are you two alright?"
"Tired," Suzuka replied tersely.
"Yes, just tired," Hisako added.
"Is everything else alright?" he asked, and he sounded more confused than anything else.
Suzuka fully sat up in her seat, eyes narrowed and mouth pressed into a tight line. She gave Hisako a look out of the corner of her eye, and it clicked: Haruka had said something to him. It made sense that Suzuka had immediately told Haruka. It was right that she told her. In fact, she was fairly certain she had seen an email in her inbox from her that morning.
Hisako didn't want to lie to him. He'd find out soon enough, probably that day. But she couldn't say the words. Instead, she forced out, "It will be. I-Is there anything we can help you with? We're just a little tired this morning, not really up for much conversation."
He didn't seem satisfied by the answer, but he let the matter drop and rooted around in his bag. He offered her an intimidatingly thick stack of papers.
"Um." It took a moment to let her eyes properly focus. It was not going to be a great day.
"There is more research in English, but my translating skills are subpar and not fast, so that is just my first findings in Japanese. Mostly. I-I couldn't get through all of it," his cheeks reddened in embarrassment, "but that should be what you need."
"What I… need?" Hisako said, overwhelmed by the very strange gift. She scanned through the first several pages, finding more than one page in English, and pictures mixed in with the text, but she still didn't understand. Suzuka leaned over her desk, just as lost.
"Haruka told me to." There was a question in his voice. Suzuka regarded him again, still cool, but Hisako realized what the papers were when she came across a word she recognized.
Inanna.
"Mathias-san, what exactly did she ask you to do?"
"Shit, Haruka," Suzuka hissed when she understood the pile of research and what Haruka had done.
"She asked me to figure out a—uh, reference to something and then tell you. Something from a legend. She said it would help you with something, but she would not give me details. Could you explain?"
"We can't," Suzuka whispered immediately.
"I know we can't." Haruka was trying to get Mathias to take over in her stead, and probably—hopefully—remind them that they weren't alone after what happened to Mika. But Hisako would be damned before she put Mathias in danger. It said a lot that Haruka was willing to trust him, especially without warning Suzuka of it.
But no one else. If it had even the slightest chance of making anyone a target for Ngeshtin-ana, they couldn't let him in.
"She was just trying to get me to finish an assignment," Suzuka lied, running a hand through her messier than usual hair. Mathias' expression shuttered but she continued anyway. "You know me, or I suppose you don't, ha. Not the best student, and since she's not here to keep me going, I guess she thought she'd use you. Please, put it out of your mind."
"Ah. Alright." He didn't even sound sad. But Hisako knew that he knew he'd just been lied to. "Excuse me. I hope that helps you a little anyway."
He left Haruka's seat and their company. Suzuka groaned and laid her head down on the thick stack of papers. "Now I feel worse in an entirely different way. I didn't know crappy feelings could stack like this."
"You'll have to take these papers for now."
"We can look over them later, I guess." She chewed on her lip and her eyes looked a little watery. "Hey… Have you ever lost anyone before?"
Hisako felt a jolt of alarm—they should not be having that conversation in the middle of their classroom. But Suzuka looked so despondent, she had to answer. "Yes. My grandfather and uncle. But this…"
"This is different, yeah. I-I know." She sniffled, loud enough to draw attention by the nearer knot of classmates. She covered the noise with action, sitting up and swiping all of the papers into a pile in her backpack, and then schooled her face into something a little more presentable. The first bell rang. "Let's talk after class, okay? ...Please?"
"Yeah, of course."
At least the surprise of Mathias' research had done a little to get her back into the real world. Ms. Yamashita, a little later than usual, beat the last handful of students in as the second bell rang. Hisako's heart sank once again when she noticed the woman's somber expression.
"...Students, I have something to tell you. There will be a school announcement as well, but I would like to tell you this first myself."
Hisako had started crying again before Ms. Yamashita had finished. There were gasps and distressed murmurs, and while she knew it was in her head, she could have sworn she could feel the eyes of their classmates on her. As if they knew, just by the admission of Mika's death, that she had a hand in it. That it was her fault.
The PA dinged with the predicted announcement soon after. For a moment, no one in their class moved to go to the auditorium, but Ms. Yamashita broke the spell by standing up first. Their classmates filed out around them, yet Hisako could not bring herself to move. Suzuka also stayed in her seat. Her shoulders shook. Their teacher waited until everyone else had left, and then said quietly, "...I know you were close with Kuroki. You may stay in here if you'd prefer."
"Thank you," Suzuka choked out. Ms. Yamashita nodded and left as well. The door was loud as it clacked shut.
They didn't speak to each other. But it was reassuring to be near someone else.
"I guess… We can look at that stuff now," Suzuka mumbled.
"Y-Yeah."
She paused before pulling out the topmost papers. When she twisted around in her seat again to face her, her eyes and face were dry. "...Alright then, so it looks like this is a bunch of stuff pulled from some historical encyclopedias… You were right, I guess, this stuff looks like it's real. It exists."
"Ancient Sumer…" She didn't actually know where Sumer was. Not anywhere near Japan, at any rate. She flipped over to the next sheet and scanned over it without any enthusiasm. It seemed like it was the middle part of some sort of story, but she immediately recognized names. Inanna and Ereshkigal. In it, Inanna was disrobing as she went through Irkalla by herself, trying to get to her sister, who then killed her as soon as she reached her at the bottommost level.
It didn't make any sense. Not that most of it did, but Ereshkigal did not seem to hate Inanna and hadn't ever attacked her in Irkalla. Inanna didn't seem to carry a grudge, either, from what she felt. Sure, Ereshkigal kept referencing a suspiciously tragic past with one another, and Nergal and Dumuzi had mentioned it as well, but if Inanna had died by her sister's hand, then why was she still alive? Why was Ereshkigal the one condemned to stay in Irkalla? It was all too confusing.
"...Maybe trying to read these right now isn't the best of ideas. I can't really focus on this," Suzuka said with a heavy sigh. "Too many foreign names for me to keep straight right now. And I only recognize half of them. I'll ask Haruka tonight if she's looked over these."
"I wish she hadn't told Mathias-san to pass these onto us," Hisako murmured and passed the papers back to her.
"Yeah, me too." She laid down across Hisako's desk, stretching far enough to nudge her shoulder against her arm. Hisako made to move away to give her more space, but Suzuka chased the movement, so she stayed, and then, after a moment, set her head down in her arms next to her. "Have you talked to Kikuchi at all today?"
"No, I haven't. Have you?"
"No. I haven't texted him and… I'm sort of scared to. I don't know him as well as you."
She wanted to argue that. She felt like she hardly knew Yuri or Mika after the day before. She felt like she barely knew anything. Nothing about Inanna, or Dumuzi, or either of their sisters. Nothing about Yuri or Mika. Nothing to save or sway anyone. "...I'm scared, too," she whispered.
Suzuka wiggled one hand out to reach over and place over Hisako's elbow. She didn't say anything. Hisako wasn't sure what she even could say. But the gesture was appreciated, and she put her own hand over hers in thanks. They remained like that, in silence, until their classmates returned.
-.-.-
The girls aimlessly walked through the residential neighborhood just past Suzuka's home. Her presence was still a comfort, even if she didn't know what to say to her. But the shorter girl seemed to have no problem bringing anything up. "So, my parents are dead. I was pretty young when it happened, so I don't really remember it or them. I guess I've lost people before, but…"
"But it's different," Hisako finished. Suzuka nodded. "It's… really different."
"I feel guilty," Suzuka said frankly. She shrugged at the way the blonde turned to her. "About a lot of things. And about… the obvious. But things I didn't expect, too—I didn't know her favorite color. Did you?"
"I… didn't." Maybe it was green or blue. But she wasn't sure, and that disconcerted her.
"I didn't know much about her. So I just…" It was only then that Suzuka withdrew from the subject. She shifted her bag back and forth in her hands. "We were really close in some ways. She knew about all this magicky stuff, and we had those slumber parties. And we were in the same class last year, too. But I didn't really know her. I think that's part of why we failed."
"I think that, too." Suzuka was so much more articulate about it than she felt, and that felt off to her, but she was also content to simply lend an ear to her friend. Hisako, for all her love of talking, needed the time to adjust first. And now that she was hyperaware of what her friends were going through, she felt even more lost. How is Yuri-kun…?
"But I knew she really liked dogs. I wanted her to meet Dango. And I know she cared about helping people, and she wanted to feel useful, and I understand those things." Suzuka wiped at her eyes and shot Hisako a weak smile. She did her best to return it. "I guess this is sort of all coming back to feeling like I have to earn the right to grieve. I have to be good enough to. Th-That's pretty dumb, huh?"
"No, it's not. It's not dumb at all." They veered off the sidewalk into a small little park, with a couple of small children playing on the other side. Suzuka sat down on the nearest bench and with a groan, sat down and buried her face in her hands. Hisako sat beside her and wondered if she should try to put her arms around her or not. "We were her friends. We were there, and we—w-we failed. And even if those things weren't true, you're allowed to feel whatever you want."
"The wake's tomorrow," she mumbled through her fingers. "Are you going?"
"...Yes. Are you?"
"I would if you were. I've never met her family."
"I haven't either." She thought about the brief mentions Yuri had made during their rescue attempt. Attempt. We failed. It was far from a new thought, but every so often, it'd hit her all over again. They were just a group of kids, they had little idea of what they were supposed to be doing, and they had paid for their lack of knowledge and experience.
Hisako began crying and Suzuka hardly hesitated in putting her arms around her in a tight hug. She didn't mind the contact then. It didn't seem like it was hard for her to comfort and grieve at the same time, even if Hisako herself had trouble doing both simultaneously. "Shh, it'll be okay. We'll be okay. We'll keep going on, for her."
"Wh-Why are you—" She couldn't think of an ending to that sentence that didn't make her feel worse. Why was she better at handling that, why was she more composed, why was she better at being a girl? "I couldn't do anything," she hissed, angry at herself.
"That's not true! You got Ereshkigal there, and even if she freaks Tiamat out, she could've healed Mika. She kept the other two off of us, too, but you're the one who came up with that."
"She didn't, though."
"If I could've—"
"We can't go back and forth on this," Hisako broke in. After a beat, Suzuka nodded and dropped her arms from her shoulders. "If there's one thing I know, it's how this sort of guilt doesn't just go away because of nice words."
"...Sucks to hear that we just need time."
"Yeah, it does."
"Well, just so you're aware, I don't blame you for anything. Just like how I'm sure you'll insist you don't blame me for not doing my job—"
"It wasn't your job to—"
"See?" Suzuka said, nudging her lightly. She smiled gently. "Let's just… We can apologize to her at her funeral, and in the future, we'll just have to do better until we stop them and end this. That's what adults are supposed to say about something like this, right?"
"...Probably."
"It sucks to try to be the responsible one." She sighed, leaned back on the bench, and frowned up at the sky. "...It would've been cool to have her on our team. Would've drove Haruka up a wall, and I can only imagine how she's dealing with this. She didn't want to talk about it with me last night."
"How much do you think she told Mathias-san?"
"I don't know, but I'll make sure she doesn't say anything else to him. Until then, I guess we have homework, huh?"
"I can look them over if you'd like."
"Would you?" Suzuka asked with a hopeful look.
"Yes, I can." It would give her something to do, at the very least. And they had to be more prepared. If there was something in the mythology about Ngeshtin-ana or Irkalla… She didn't even know what to look for. But Haruka had nearly broken their promise of silence to deliver the information, so she had to think there'd be something valuable. Progress in exchange for not thinking for awhile; it would be perfect.
"Sweet sunshine, thank you. I was worried I'd start ripping up the papers or something if I came across anything about that sister."
"That's what you're grateful for?" Hisako asked before she could stop herself.
Suzuka didn't seem fazed by it. "Yeah! Dude, we're both sort of shit at this comforting thing right now, and I'm okay with that. I'm betting it all on feeling better after the funeral and after we can beat someone's face in during our next trip to Irkalla. So the less I think about it in the meantime, the better I'll do."
"So you'd rather have a friend than a therapist, huh?" she asked wryly. Suzuka beamed at her in response. Hisako reached out, and Suzuka met her halfway in the hug. She wasn't sure if she had noticed her hesitation. "I don't think I can play therapist right now, so I'll focus on being a friend."
"Good. We're in this together, after all."
With a flash, her Sun card reappeared in her mind, and then in her pocket. They had each other, and for the time being, Hisako was okay with that.
They parted soon after, backtracking to their neighborhood, and she was immensely surprised to find her father home. She quickly shoved the tarot card back into her pocket as he looked up from the couch. "P-Papa, you're home early." She had worried him the night before, staying in her room, but she thought she'd done an admirable job acting functional that morning.
Koichi didn't answer her immediately. He stood up and crossed the distance between them with a frightening sort of haste, and it clicked in her mind when he leaned down to eye level to search her face. "Hisako, are you alright?" The dropped nickname weighed on her heart.
She had to avoid his gaze. "I was just out with Suzuka-chan. We went for a walk."
She caught the way his expression broke out of the corner of her eye. "That's not what I meant. I got a call from the school today." There was a waver in his voice.
She felt guilty for not telling him the night before, but how could she have sat down and had that conversation with him? Especially with the timeline of it; she and Suzuka weren't supposed to know. Fear poked into the guilt that had settled in the pit of her stomach.
"Are you alright?" he repeated.
Almost all of the good feelings from her talk with Suzuka evaporated. She loved her father, and she cherished the close bond they shared, but she didn't know how to talk about Mika with him. She could only nod. He hugged her, he told her he was there for her, and he kept asking if she was okay, but it felt like there was a wall between them. She said as little as possible, and she could tell that hurt him, but what else could she do?
After a somber, awkward dinner, she pinned the Sun card back up to her board. Right in between the Star and the grey Tower.
-.-.-
Friday, June 6th, 2014
…
Yuri walked into the wake looking severely uncomfortable and unkempt in his suit. It was the first time either Hisako or Suzuka had seen him since they'd left him with Mika. None of the ceremonies had started yet, and it looked like it'd be a smaller affair, but there was a handful of upperclassmen and several of their classmates already there. There was an older couple whom Suzuka had nodded to, a couple families with small children, several adults who must have been family, and two teachers, Ms. Yamashita and Mr. Akiyama. The girls had already greeted Mika's parents, introduced themselves, offered their koden, and paid their first respects to Mika.
But it hadn't felt official until Yuri arrived.
Suzuka's hand tightened on hers as he walked past them without looking at them. Near the altar, Mika's mother's expression tightened into a scowl. It looked so much like her daughter that Hisako's stomach flipped over.
"You're not welcome here," the woman told Yuri.
Hisako was fairly certain Suzuka was about to break her hand.
Yuri stubbornly held out his condolence money straight to her without saying a word.
"You're not welcome here," she repeated, louder. Several seated guests shifted uncomfortably. Hisako spotted the teachers exchange a look and a couple of their nearer classmates started whispering to each other.
Yuri made things infinitely worse when he growled back, "I deserve to be here more than you."
She wasn't sure she gasped when she heard that or when the woman slapped him. "Get out of here!" she shouted with her hand raised again. "You killed our daughter! You hurt her and you hated her and now you've come to what, gloat?!"
"Dear, please—" Mika's father started, forcing his wife's arm back down, but she shook him off. Hisako was already on her feet, and she saw Ms. Yamashita halfway standing, too.
Yuri threw the envelope at them. "I don't care what you say to me. I never did. But how can you stand there and spout such crap about her? I wish she had better people to mourn her!" With that, he turned and ran back down the aisle.
"Yuri-kun!" Hisako stumbled out of her seat and rushed after him. Thankfully, he hadn't made it very far outside, just halfway across the lawn before he'd collapsed to his knees. He turned to her as she ran up and without warning her, wrapped his arms around her waist and buried his face in her stomach, sobbing.
Shock didn't begin to cover it. She tentatively put her hands on his head and carded her fingers through his dark hair and had to hope that helped. She couldn't believe he'd said those things to Mika's parents, and she could believe even less the things they'd said to him. And now she had the feeling he wouldn't be allowed back in.
"That's not fair…" She sunk down against him, tears burning at her eyes, and tried to process the fact that he had just been kicked out of Mika's wake. "O-Oh my god, Yuri-kun, how could she say such a cruel thing…!"
"She's a bitch," he rasped against her neck. As she started crying, he seemed to calm down, though he still had her in a tight hold. "She always hated me. She hated Mika. She's a horrible, cruel woman, and I can't stand to think of her in there!"
At a loss for words, she pulled back, wiped her eyes, and sniffed. "...Your suit looks horrible."
"I think I ripped a seam on your dress," he mumbled, eyes still wet and downcast.
"You what?!"
"Just me breaking everything I touch again."
Hisako frowned at that. She tugged him to his feet, although he cooperated as well as a sack of rice, and they went back to sit down by the side of the building. The day was nice enough that several of the windows were open. She couldn't believe they were about to spend the wake outside, but like hell she was going to leave him.
"...Haruka-chan had Mathias-san doing research for us."
"Really."
"I haven't read all of it, but it looks like now we have some background information on what's been going on." She kept her tone light, but reached over and gave his hand a squeeze.
He sighed, sunk down, and put his head against her shoulder. "You want to know what that was about, huh?"
"I do. Are you okay to talk about it?"
"I think I'll explode if I don't. Maybe you'll be able to tell me a reason why I'm stuck out here and they're in there." Yuri sighed and pressed his face against her arm. "So Mika and I have known each other since grade school. Somehow we became friends, don't ask me how or why she put up with me."
"She was your friend, that's why. She cared about you."
"Look where that got her."
"Do not talk about yourself like that."
"I thought you liked talking," he said bitterly. She managed to bite back her own anger but withdrew her hand to cross her arms. "Sorry, I'm sorry. This is just hard."
"You don't have to—"
"I meant this." He kicked his shoes at the grass they were sitting on. Overhead, a prayer filtered out of the window. Hisako unfolded her arms and he offered his hand again. She squeezed her eyes shut and took it, and mercifully, he began talking again to cover the sound. "Friends since forever. Friends learn things about each other, like how very unhappy someone is at home. ...We both were, but she had it worse. Her parents… Her mom, she was always saying such mean things to her. Putting too much pressure on her. Restricting what she could and couldn't do. She never hit her, not that I knew, but… God, I was such a dumb kid."
"I'm sure she valued your friendship very much."
"Yeah, she did. Which is why I'm a huge asshole. ...You know how much she loved dogs, right? Naturally, her parents wouldn't let her get one, but she was bound and determined. Having a dog meant she could make her own rules. The dumb, frickin' dog represented a lot more than it should have."
His words to Mika in Irkalla about getting her a dog made more sense, and it only made it hurt more.
"In middle school, somehow, we got the idea to run away together. She was babysitting and tutoring, and I got an allowance, so we thought we could save up. At sixteen, we were going to grab our shit and run for it. And she'd get a dog. Except I started getting attention." Yuri sighed raggedly and drew his knees up to his chest. His free hand gripped the dark fabric of his pants with white knuckles. "I started winning awards for those dumb paintings, and my parents started screaming it to the heavens. I became a prodigy. It's just something I do, in class or in my free time, so I didn't care—until someone bought one. I realized I could make money off of it.
"I thought if I could get a big enough reputation, I could sell paintings and do commissions wherever we ended up. We could run away and I wouldn't have to pick up a stupid job to pay rent. I could have my cake and eat it, too. You can probably figure out where this is headed by now."
"...You didn't go with her," Hisako said softly.
"It was never enough, you know? And I was scared. I was downright terrified that this newfound fame would go away. I finally had something here, and I clung to it, and meanwhile, it was getting worse for her. I kept putting off our plans, until finally, we had a huge fight over it. ...For whatever reason, she didn't go without me. She eventually told me that she still had her plan, she was just waiting until eighteen. So she still had to wait to get her dog. Because of me. So I was a selfish coward, and now, she's never going to get away from her parents and she'll never drag me out to go apartment decoration shopping and she'll never get that damned dog!"
"I'm so sorry," she said, and the words fell flat. "You were young, you both were. I'm sure she understood…"
"We were both kids and it was a stupid plan. But it was what kept her going," he replied tonelessly. He peeked up at Hisako through his shaggy bangs. "...Thank you, for being her friend. I-I think it helped."
"You don't have to thank me for that."
"Then, thank you for sitting out here and getting grass all over your butt and dress and missing this with me?"
"I was never much for tradition anyway," she said lamely, but he cracked a smile anyway. In the bright sunlight, she wasn't completely blinded by the flash of light. He didn't notice her wince. It felt a little like cheating, gaining something like that at the expense of Mika, but he had opened up to her on his own terms, so she had to focus on that. "Um, thank you for sharing that with me. I didn't want to press, but after that—"
"You owe me one. Have any tragic backstory you want to share?" The joke sent her heart into her throat and she nearly regretted the social link rank up. He didn't seem to notice the way her hands were suddenly sweaty, and said, "You can just help me catch up on the homework I've missed. I think I'm tired of story time for awhile."
"R-Right, okay."
"And… Just sit here with me for awhile. You could probably go back in if you'd like, b-but I'm not welcome, and I don't really want to leave yet."
"...Of course. But if I find that you've actually torn my dress you owe me."
"...I'll lend you my jacket to cover it."
"You actually did?!"
They didn't talk about Mika again until people began filing out of the building. Suzuka found them almost immediately, looking stricken, but she didn't mention the ceremony they'd missed. "In my mind we shared my incense for her." She sat down on Hisako's other side.
"More than I was hoping to get," Yuri said.
"Thank you, Suzuka-chan. I'm sorry to just leave you like that."
"I'm sorry I didn't chase after you, too." She set her purse and return gift down in the grass and all but crawled into Hisako's lap. She tensed at the contact but calmed a bit when she used the movement to hug Yuri.
"So, do we go back in to get our presents or what?" he asked.
"I-I'm not sure?" She'd never been to any sort of service by herself, much less one that she'd walked out on.
"I'm not going back in there."
"I'm not if you're not!"
"...If we had fire magic, we could've done all this ourselves," he said without warning. Both girls gave him matching looks of horror. Yuri turned away, but he didn't look all that apologetic. "Sorry. My self-censor is running on empty today."
"Are you two alright? Or, three." They looked up at their homeroom teacher, Ms. Yamashita, standing over them. "I had not expected that sort of spectacle in there."
"You know, just teenage drama—"
"Don't lie to me, Kikuchi. It's not my place to say anything, not now, but the least I can do is make sure you're alright."
"...I'm fine," he grumbled.
"Will I see you back at school tomorrow, then? All three of you?"
"Yeah, yeah."
"Hey, we've been there!" Suzuka piped up. Hisako nodded.
"I hardly would have blamed you if you had taken some time for yourselves."
"Should a teacher be telling us to skip?"
"It's not skipping if you're excused. But the three of you, I want to see you at class tomorrow, just so long as you're not pushing yourselves for it. I don't want more empty seats than I have to see."
The woman departed after that. They decided to leave with the rest of the mourners, hoping to blend in a little, even if most of them gave Yuri a wide berth. On the bus ride back, Hisako discovered that the seam on one of her shoulders was, indeed, ripped.
-.-.-
Saturday, June 7th, 2014
…
Hisako slunk around her own home like a dog with its tail between its legs. It wasn't like her father was pressing her for anything. Once he figured out she wanted space, he gave it to her, while being at home as much as he could for her. It was incredibly understanding of him and only made her feel guiltier. She wished she could confide in him, but what good would that do? He'd worry himself into the hospital.
She ducked into her room as soon as she could. He had only briefly asked how the funeral was and let her escape soon after. If he chalked it up purely to grieving… But she was paranoid that he was going to ask about the timing. He had gotten the call from the school the day after the came home and locked herself in her room to cry. At the very least, he'd be hurt and confused she didn't tell him about it then. She was supposed to be mature and worthy of his trust.
She shut the door behind her and swallowed back tears. The funeral was over. She had the weekend to cry and read that research. Next week would be better.
"Are you alright, my dear?"
Hisako grabbed the nearest thing—her desk lamp—and swung it around at the well-dressed figure. Dumuzi, literally cornered, could only raise his hands to protect his face. "Why are you in my room?!"
"I came to see how you were coping!" Dumuzi cried pathetically. He was so much less imposing in human guise, and without Inanna forcing her feelings into the situation, Hisako felt she could act rationally.
She hit him with the lamp again. "I just went to my friend's funeral! Because you couldn't handle your sister, despite your promise!"
"I did not aid her further! Inanna, please, think of your own sister, the lengths you have gone for her! Can you blame me for having reservations about raising my claws against her?"
Hisako deflated. It wasn't as if she had the energy to put into staying angry at him. She set the lamp back on her desk, hoping it wasn't broken, and checked the door again to make sure it was locked. "...Be quiet, please. I don't blame you, not really. But I'm not pleased you're here. I don't care for your sympathy right now."
"Then, a gift?"
She arched an eyebrow.
"Ninhursag."
"Bless you?"
"Your friend—Enlil wished to know who your deceased friend was," he said delicately. His body language was still submissive, but now that she knew what he really looked like, she easily picked out all of the nonhuman bits. Just the way he moved his arms and shoulders alone were off. "Nergal did not know because he had not seen her. I had. It was Ninhursag, a mother goddess of the earth. Another fertility goddess."
She felt her cheeks heat up despite herself. "I am not a fertility goddess."
He smiled a little but didn't respond to that. She would have had to hit him if he had. "I am very sorry about what happened to her. I wish it hadn't."
"Do you have anything else to say? I'm not in the mood to speak to you."
"I merely wanted to offer you that for—in peace, I hope. I will do my best to stop my sister. I hope this does not happen again, but Inanna, you surely must be aware that there is the possibility…?" he asked cautiously.
"Yes, I'm aware."
He looked as if he wanted to say something else, but must have decided against it. "Good. I-I will leave you to your proper grieving, then." And then, even more strangely, he seemed embarrassed by that. Dumuzi gave her a short bow, kissed her hair, and when she tried to hit him with the lamp, disappeared.
Hisako groaned and resigned herself to a long night of reading.
-.-.-
Tuesday, June 10th, 2014
…
"Why do I have to come along again?" Yuri groused, interrupting Hisako's explanation. Again.
They were all together because it was a Tuesday, but they weren't going into Irkalla. They couldn't, not yet. "For protection!" Suzuka sang. "Mister tall, dark, and punk."
Yuri had taken to wearing his hair back in a ponytail to keep it out of his face, which already changed how he looked, but it also caused most of their classmates to realize he had earrings, too. Almost everyone agreed he was trying to change his appearance because of Mika's death. The rumor mill marched on. Hisako and Suzuka, who had already seen him like that when he was fighting, weren't bothered in the least. And he did act as a good deterrent for any approaching passersby.
"As I was saying," Hisako broke back in, miffed, "Ereshkigal was kidnapped. Inanna went down to see her, but Ereshkigal had already become queen of Irkalla, and she couldn't leave, anyway. She tried to use that same rule to trap her sister—"
"You," Yuri said.
If he wasn't carrying most of their stuff, she would have told him to leave if he wasn't interested. "Inanna died in Irkalla. That seems like it's important to know!"
"Okay, so she died. How'd she get better? That's probably why you can come and go as you please, huh?" Suzuka asked, voice soothing. It didn't really help.
"There was a power vacuum. Ereshkigal had to take over Inanna's duties as a goddess, except she's associated with life and, um, creating more life, so since she had become a goddess of death after taking over Irkalla, it made her sick. By the time Inanna's backup arrived to save her, Ereshkigal wanted her gone more than anything else. But the rule still applied—someone had to take her place."
"And that's where hubby comes in, right?"
"Yes. Dumuzi wasn't grieving for his wife in a way that satisfied her, so she told Ereshkigal's demons to drag him back to Irkalla in her stead."
"He's more forgiving of Inanna than I'd be," Yuri mused. Suzuka nodded with a grimace.
"Well, apparently Inanna was really fickle, because she started lamenting his loss soon after. That's their winter myth. Everything dies because the main fertility goddess is too sad to do her duties."
"So, what about Tiamat?"
"But I wasn't done," Hisako grumbled.
"I'd almost rather be in Irkalla. I didn't sign up to be a pack mule, bodyguard, and captive student today."
"Oh no, you're learning!" Suzuka exclaimed in horror. "Okay, finish up your myth and then get to Tiamat."
"Well, mine has to do with Ereshkigal and Irkalla…"
"You can skip on Enlil's stuff if it'll make you feel better."
"I didn't read much about him. But he's one of the gods who Inanna asked for help. He didn't, so that's probably why Dumuzi doesn't like you much."
"Oh joy."
"So Dumuzi's sister, sad about her brother, offered to take his place for half the year in Irkalla, so he could see Inanna and then she'd be happy and make the crops grow. She didn't do it for Inanna, but him. And that's why they're both trapped down there, Inanna's not, and it's worrying to have them both running around. I still don't know how they're getting out…"
"Tiamat time!" Suzuka crowed.
Hisako sighed. "Tiamat is an entirely different myth. She's part of the creation myth. She died, too."
"Ereshkigal already told us that much," Yuri pointed out.
"She died to create the world. She was a goddess of chaos and the oceans, and she got into a big battle after her husband was killed. So your Persona was married, too."
"I hope my husband wasn't a bird man," Suzuka said with a fake swoon. "Chaotic ocean goddess, though. I can get behind that."
"Are you sure you don't want to hear anything about Enlil?" Hisako asked, a little surprised. But he shook his head. "Okay… How much further is it now?"
"Um… Maybe a block?" Suzuka guessed.
"You don't know?" Yuri hissed, hands tightening on his backpack. "You already have us wandering around back alleys and some shady shops, and we're all lugging around so much gold—"
"Let's not advertise that!" Hisako interrupted.
"One more block!" the redhead exclaimed as she spotted a sign. She ran on ahead, seemingly unburdened by her own bag, nearly giving Hisako a heart attack as she did so. She wasn't necessarily worried about the area of the city they were in, but she did not want the smallest member of their group on her own.
But they made it to the little shop in one piece. Suzuka went right in, whereas Yuri and Hisako stood a moment to look at the rather shabby front. The sign was broken, rusted, and hand-painted in places, there were bars over the windows and door, and what they could see inside was an unorganized mess of things. Supposedly, it was either a pawn shop or a collector's shop. Even Suzuka was a little confused on the details.
"...At least we'll be able to sell these gold coins, right?" Hisako asked, a little faintly. Yuri stubbornly waited until she went first, and then followed her in.
Suzuka was leaning across the counter, talking animatedly to a somewhat greasy-looking middle-aged man. His appearance did not improve Hisako's mood or opinion of the place. "Oh, and here are my friends! Guys, this is my cousin—well, he's with Kazu-nii, so close enough! Eiri Arisaka, these are my friends, Yuri Kikuchi and Hisako Fujihara."
"Nii?" Yuri echoed. Hisako elbowed him.
"Nice to see little Suzu-chan is growing up to have friends other than Haru-chan. Surprised she's not in on this illicit deal of yours, too."
"She's overseas right now as an exchange student. And aren't you the one helping with this illicit deal? You can't blame this on me," she said with a chuckle. Yuri and Hisako exchanged another concerned look. Suzuka caught it and hastily explained, "It's not illegal or anything! It's just a joke, 'cause I don't really talk to him or Kazumichi all that often, and then I call him up out of nowhere to ask if he'll buy gold coins."
"And you won't tell me where you got them," Eiri said mildly. He spread his hands on the counter and gave them a grin. "So let's see these gold coins of yours."
He was clearly not expecting anything serious from them. It was funny how his smile slowly slipped from his face when Suzuka reached into her bag, pulled out a handful of the coins, and set them in front of them. They glinted in the dim lighting. "We're pretty sure they're solid gold, because they're pretty heavy, but we figure you'd know a bit more about that, too."
The man picked one up with something like awe. "These… sure look real. What's this marking on them?"
"No idea!" Suzuka chirped.
"Suzuka, where did you find these?"
"I can't tell you that. We're willing to take a lower price for them, though, just so long as you don't pry too much."
"When did you become so secretive?" Eiri asked, but he sounded impressed. He turned the coin over and over in his fingers, held it up against the light, and then fished a box out of the cabinet behind him. He ran a magnet over the coins, which didn't react. He then bit one, and examined the mark it left, eyebrows shooting up in surprise. Suzuka took one of the coins back and chewed on it thoughtfully. "These are definitely gold, and a high percentage at that. Have you had these tested at all?"
"No, we were hoping you knew how to do that."
"I know how, but I don't have any acid with me right now. Checked the density?"
"That's, uh, mass over volume, right?"
Eiri set a coin on the scale and frowned at the weight. "Seven grams. Let's assume it's eighteen karats for easy math. That's about five grams of gold per coin, and gold is around four thousand yen per gram. So you're looking at a cool twenty thousand per coin." Suzuka spat out the coin.
He eyed the six on the counter, completely unaware of the rest in Yuri's bag. "...How many do we have again?" Hisako whispered to him.
"Seventy-eight."
"That's rough estimates for the numbers, and that's pretty close to market price. And that's assuming I buy them," he said as Suzuka scrubbed her spit off of the one. "But I'm still very interested in how you came across these."
"We didn't steal them!"
"Suzuka, I don't think you stole actual gold coins from anyone."
"Do you want to buy them or not? We can't tell you any details either way, that's part of the deal. ...And if you won't buy them, could you at least point us in the direction of some coin collectors who could? Pretty please?"
"Why should I enable this? I'm not sure a couple of teenagers should suddenly have that much spending money."
He still didn't know about the rest of the coins. Hisako began to sweat as she struggled to do the math in her head.
"Because you're family," Suzuka told him.
It took a long moment for his expression to soften, but it did, and he rubbed the back of his neck with a pleased blush. "W-Well, you always were a sweetheart. And I suppose this can count for not being in touch all that great the past couple of years."
"Did you know Hiroya's getting married?"
"Wha—no, I didn't!"
"I'll talk to him about inviting you and Kazu-nii if you do this for us," Suzuka said sunnily.
"Now that's playing dirty, and you know it."
"We have a bunch of gold we can't explain we're trying to sell. We're a little desperate," Yuri said without thinking. Eiri's eyes narrowed when he was again reminded of their presence.
"Think of what a nice wedding present you can get them once you sell all this gold!"
"You're trusting me an awful lot. These could be pure gold and I could be shorting you. I could be making up numbers off the top of my head. I could go tattle to your grandparents about this after you leave." It probably was pure gold, but they weren't going to argue the point. Maybe he knew that.
"We're okay with the lower number, but I trust you. We trust you." Yuri and Hisako eagerly nodded. "We just need this favor. You do a favor for us, we'll do a favor for you. Plus you get a ton of gold! How shiny and awesome!"
"Gold coins can be hard to sell if you have too many of them." Suzuka's smile became a little more strained. "But I do know a couple collectors in Tokyo. I'll do this for you on good faith, provided you don't use it to buy booze or cigarettes or something."
"Eiri-nii, I'm sixteen, I'm not gonna go buy beer with this," she groaned. "But we have a deal?"
"I guess we do." He shook her hand on it. She turned and gave Yuri a wide grin. He looked a little uneasy, but he shrugged off his backpack and turned it upside-down on the counter. He and Hisako ducked quickly to pick up the coins that dropped to the ground. "What the—?! Suzuka, you little brat! This isn't how you do business!"
"We had a deal!"
"How many are there?"
"Seventy-eight."
"How do you have seventy-eight old-ass gold coins on you?!"
"We have a pack mule," she said, patting Yuri's arm affectionately. He yanked his arm away with a scowl. Not that the girls couldn't have carried them, but he made things easier. "We have other things to sell, too, if you want non-gold-coins. Just thought we should open with the big numbers."
Eiri glowered at her. "Are you trying to fleece me?"
"No, we just really want to be rid of the things we've, uh, collected on our journeys."
"You're a schoolgirl! You don't have journeys!"
"How much do pearls go for?" Suzuka asked, bringing out a fistful of necklaces. Eiri buried his head in his arms on the pile of gold.
After he got over the shock of it all, he went along with purchasing their things just for the sheer ridiculousness. Hisako wasn't sure if that was a good thing or not, but it worked in their favor. And most of the things they were trying to sell were valuable.
He didn't have enough cash to buy everything once they figured out tentative prices for everything, but he did put them in touch with a jeweller he knew who would buy the pearls and the handful of strange stones the hellhounds left. Eiri also swore off any future dealings with them, but agreed to act as a connection to people who would, because he apparently became fond of the idea of turning Suzuka loose on his acquaintances.
"You have weird family," Hisako had to tell her as they left the jeweller, who was a nice old lady who almost began crying when she saw the "beautiful pearls". Awkward, but a little endearing, and at least she agreed to buy any future jewels or necklaces.
"I guess. Comes in handy sometimes, too. But even I'm at a loss when it comes to selling feathers, bones, or hair. Why'd we take the hair, again?"
Hisako shrugged. "I-I just sort of grab whatever's left over. It's easier to sort it out later."
"I'll take it," Yuri suggested. The girls turned to him in surprise. "I'll see if I can make brushes out of it. Unless you want to try to track down a wig maker or something."
"I don't think we have that much…"
"It was a joke."
"Oh! But I do have an aunt and uncle who can use the feathers and bones!"
Yuri facepalmed. "Really. You really do. How large is your family, anyway?"
"Mom's side of the family is huge. But…" Suzuka trailed off as she closed her bag again. She peeked up at Yuri unsubtly. "...I'll take it to them. I mean, it's only a couple things, and they're pretty light, so we don't need your carrying expertise anymore. You're fired."
"Um, are you sure?" Hisako asked as Yuri only stared at Suzuka.
"Yeah, I can do this one on my own."
"Why?" he asked bluntly.
"It's… a pet store. They always need supplies, and feathers can be turned into cat toys, and dogs like to chew on bones. Good for their teeth, I think."
"Then why—" Hisako cut herself off when she saw Yuri's expression; he looked like he'd been slapped. She looked back at Suzuka, who was staunchly avoiding his gaze as she rummaged around in her bag again.
She held out a fistful of hair, tied by a ribbon, and after he took that, an intimidating stack of yen. "This is your cut. I don't expect we'll make much off of feathers and bones."
"Keep it, I don't care. It'll be an exchange for the hair. I'll… see you two later, then." And with that, he left, leaving Hisako utterly clueless in his wake.
Suzuka started walking again without saying anything else about it. She had little choice but to follow. It took a bus ride across the city plus another hike through winding roads, but eventually they found themselves at a cheery little pet store decorated in yellows and greens.
"This is where Mika-chan worked," Suzuka mumbled just before she pushed inside.
Stunned, it took her a couple moments to get moving again. She remembered Mika had had a job at a pet store, but she had never thought she'd visit it. Definitely not in the current circumstances. Hisako finally followed her into the little shop, finding Suzuka already talking with an older couple. After a beat, she recognized them from the wake.
A loud, screeching squawk shocked her out of her thoughts. "Fool! Fool!" a parrot shrieked at her with its wings raised.
"Angelina, quiet! That is a guest!" the old woman shouted.
The grey parrot folded its wings again but maintained its evil look. She edged away nervously. It wasn't in a cage, just sitting on a perch near the cash register.
"Please, don't be nervous around her. She's very sweet normally, it's just… She's been very upset since she lost her favorite caretaker."
Hisako's heart leapt up into her throat. Suzuka reached over for her and drew her away from Angelina the parrot. "Auntie, uncle, this is Hisako-chan. She's a classmate of mine and was friends with Mika-chan, too."
"Oh, no. I do seem to recall someone with yellow hair like yours at the ceremony, but…" The frail old man peered up at her, as if trying to place her. It wasn't surprising he didn't exactly remember her, since she hadn't been there for most of it. "I'm very sorry you lost your friend. It's always tragic to hear of a young person passing, but Mika-chan was such a dear, sweet girl."
"Yes, she was," she mumbled. She could still feel the parrot's eyes on her. Mika had worked with that?
"I miss! I miss Mika-chan! I miss!" the parrot squawked, on cue.
"She does that every time she hears her name. Of course, Mika-chan was good with all of our animals, but Angelina is a very smart bird. She understands mourning."
"I miss! Mine!" Angelina insisted with a wail loud enough to set some dogs in the back barking. The sound of the dogs had her thinking of Mika all over again.
"Well, we don't want to cause a racket. We just stopped by because we found some things we think your animals could play with," Suzuka said loudly to be heard over the bird.
"That's very sweet of you, dear. Thank you very much." The old woman took the bag with the feathers and gasped at all the different colors. "Ohh, our kitties will love these! We only have three right now, but you know how rough animals can be with their toys sometimes. And look at all of these treats for our dogs! Thank you, both of you."
"You can just have them. Sorry we didn't try to make toys for the cat or anything," Suzuka said sheepishly.
"These old fingers can still tie knots well enough to make a cat toy or two," the woman said with a wink.
Hisako jumped when Angelina flapped over and settled on the man's shoulder. The bird jammed her face right up next to the bag of feathers. Suzuka chuckled, though at Angelina's curiosity or Hisako's skittishness, she wasn't sure.
"I can have? Just one?" Angelina asked hopefully. Hisako knew parrots were smart, and that they could talk, but it was her first time hearing one in-person. It was a little unnerving.
The old man pulled a purple feather from the bag and handed it to her. Angelina tweeted happily, took it gently with her beak, and stuck it in her own tail feathers. "Pretty birdy," Suzuka cooed.
"Yes, I am," she replied smugly. They all laughed at that, even if Hisako couldn't quite shake her sense of unease.
They said their goodbyes after the girls briefly said hello to the rest of the animals. The store looked lonely, with only the old couple and their sad parrot. It wasn't as if she disliked the bird, but something about her felt weird. "Don't be afraid to stop by to play with the animals at any time, both of you. They miss Mika-chan and would love the company."
"I'll try to visit a little more—" Suzuka started but was cut off by Angelina's shriek.
"I miss Mika-chan! I miss mine! I miss my tower!" the bird squawked.
Hisako gaped at her. Suzuka didn't catch on and just waved as she tugged her friend back outside. "So three teenagers walk into my cousin's shop and walk out a million richer. Each."
The shock of all the money warred with her shock at the parrot's word choice. The parrot would still be there later; the money won out. "I still can't believe… This is a lot of money."
"I am going to buy the nicest damned set of throwing knives I can find on the internet. And throwing lessons. And a new computer, I think. And maybe a decent wedding present for my brother."
Hisako had rather been thinking about hospital bills and replacement uniforms and wondering how she could offer to pay rent without her father getting concerned. "What about college?"
"What about college? We're still second-years and we'll… We'll have to visit Irkalla again. We'll get more stuff."
"...Next week?"
"We really should. There will probably be a talking shadow in her area, huh?"
"Probably. We should take it out before anything else happens."
"Yeah, probably." The bus ride back was quiet after that. Hisako's thoughts wandered from the money, to the parrot, to Mika, and then back to Irkalla. They'd learned some context from the mythology research Mathias had done, but she wasn't sure how truly helpful it was. It was just context. But it had kept her focused on that the past weekend, and that had been useful in itself.
It wasn't until she was back in her room, looking at the bills spread across her bed, that the money hit her. "Oh my god." She had almost a million yen, just sitting there. How was she going to explain that to her father when she couldn't even talk to him about Mika?
-.-.-
Knowledge: level 3/5 (+4)
-Studious
Confidence: level 2/5 (+0)
-Secure
Charm: level 1/5 (+0)
-Awkward
Empathy: level 2/5 (+4)
-Sensitive
Hisako Fujihara's Reluctant Fan social link has ranked up! The Sun arcana has reached rank 2.
Hisako Fujihara's Painter social link has ranked up! The Magician arcana has reached rank 4.