Worse

I am here to defend the right to offend.
Ayaan Hirsi Ali

'I have reached a decision.' Odin's voice vibrates through the room and the few people present. 'This court will gather again in 6 days to resume the inquiries. The counsel must berate the information that was presented today. Today, I can not make the decision with the necessary precaution. Lady Sif, until this court comes together again, you are banished from the palace for the time being. I must take the accusation serious.' He eyes each of the opponents thoroughly as if to prove his point.

Sif nods rigid, the first real reaction she's made since the All-father had left the room.

Loki sighs, if because of relief or because of resignation, he doesn't care.

'The court is dismissed.', Odin announces dramatically. The few people present start to gather in groups to talk and slowly move towards the doors.

His mother approaches him after Odin has withdrawn himself. She looks slightly worried about Loki but altogether quite relieved that this is finally over for now.

'Shall I accompany you back to your room?'

'No.', Loki says distracted, looking over at Thor who avoids his stare. 'I first need to talk to Thor.'

Thor is already on his way out of the room, when Loki walks after him after shaking off his mother, trying not to flinch from the effort of catching up. The blond seems not to want to talk to him, he probably is still mad.

'Thor, can we talk?', Loki says rather formally after finally catching up.

'Sure, brother.' Somehow he suspects the blond just says that because there is no polite way to decline.

They are already near Thor's chambers so they quickly retreat there.

'What is it?' His impatience is evident.

'Are you happy now?', Loki says angrily after closing the door behind them. He hadn't meant to say that, hadn't expected to get angry about the tone of Thor's voice.

Thor furrows his brow. 'Why should I be happy?'

'About the outcome? Your precious Sif has more time to prove that I am nothing more than the lying revengeful weakling everyone thinks I am. You think that too, right?'

'Loki, brother. Heed your words.'

Loki can tell Thor is about to explode, he doesn't mind. 'I am right, am I not? Who did you hope would be proven right?'

'Loki, if this is again because of your petty jealousy..'

'If I react like that, you tell me to stop. So what right do you have to be jealous? I did not sleep with half the maidens and warriors of Asgard!'

Thor swallows back his immediate anger. It gives Loki a sense of satisfaction, Thor had always been sorry for his behavior back then. 'No, but you tricked half of them to believe whatever lies you feed them! No surprise that you didn't sleep with them, please don't pretend it was because you didn't want to!'

'So you exchanged the maidens just because you could? That's deep, Thor.' His voice is dripping with sarcasm.

'I did it because I loved you. But of course, you know nothing about love!', Thor yells.

'I thought I did.', Loki says quietly. Maybe he had been mistaken.

'No, Loki. I didn't-' Thor immediately backtracks.

'You didn't mean it?', Loki asks. 'You don't trust me. You show that with every action of yours, with every word. What have I done that made you despise me so much? What makes you think I do not love you equally?'

'You are ignorant towards the love I feel for you. I want to be there for you, want to help you, and all you do is push me away. You are a fool, brother, for questioning my motives. I am worried for you.'

'You have a funny way of showing that! Is this your try to end this? Your plan to rid yourself of me?', Loki hisses.

'It is you who acts like I think only the worst of you! Do you have no faith in us anymore?', Thor exclaims. As if it would be Loki's fault.

'Don't you dare blaming me now! You are the one doubting me. Ever since you realized I am not such a big, strong warrior like yourself. Go on, say it. I am weak, I am no longer worthy of your affections.'

'That is insane, Loki.', Thor insists.

'If you want me gone, fine.' Loki turns around and leaves the rooms before hastening down the hallways to the healing halls, falling in his bed without removing his armor.

The blond maybe doesn't know it, but Loki knows for sure. Thor finally woke up. He had promised he wouldn't but he did. Loki had always known that it must end one day. A single tear escapes his eyes. He had just hoped for more time.

xXxXx

Thor is frozen by shock. He stares at the closed door while the words of his brother still echo in his mind. Thor had hoped for an apology or at least an explanation for yesterday's fight, maybe a temporary peace-agreement to talk about the trial but this he would have never expected.

His brother has never lashed out like this. Maybe he is just looking for a reason to break up with Thor, a small voice in his head whispers. Loki apparently doesn't care anymore so why should Thor? Still, he loves his ravenette. May his stupid trusting heart be damned.

Deep in his heart Thor knows there is something else. The sandy haired man is what stands between them. Why can't his brother see reason and simply tell him who he is?

Slowly he calms down again and tries to occupy his mind with more pleasant thoughts, which isn't working at all.

The next morning comes gray and rainy, mirroring perfectly Thor's mood. He is used to the rain that often pours down when his emotions run high or his spirits are particularly low. His friends minus Sif already occupy their table in the dining hall, all three looking just as gloomy as Thor feels. After a short silent greeting, silence settles again. His friends want to talk about the trial, but Thor is unsure if he can without increasing the rain even more.

'It is somehow silent without Sif.', Volstagg remarks.

'It won't be too long until we wish she'd be silent again.', Fandral says smiling.

'Do you believe Loki?', Thor asks quietly, fearing the answer.

Hogun answers: 'I do not doubt that he would have thrown himself in Sif's line for any reason less.'

'Funny, I would have guessed if he truly saw that, he'd let Sif do the dirty work for him.', Volstagg jokes. Noticing the raised eyebrow of his crown-prince, the red-head shrugs. 'He had always ambitions to overtake you in the succession of the throne.'

'But not like that.', Fandral intervenes. 'I do not know what to think to be honest. I can't even imagine how it must be for you, standing in the middle.'

'Fortunately we don't have to make the decision.'

'I guess the All-father has already made up his mind.', Hogun says.

'I fear so as well.', Thor confesses. Sif's temporary banishment would be seen as enough penance because none of them would be able to prove their statements and the use of truth potions is unfortunately forbidden during an inquiry by laws older than any living Asgardian can remember. Odin had never been more tempted to ignore them than now.

Because he doesn't care if he broods alone in his chambers or together with his friends, Thor accompanies them to the grounds. Battle doesn't wait for good weather, neither would the warriors of Asgard. Still Thor's thoughts drift to the trickster, undoubtably plotting against himself.

What makes him think that? Is a relationship not founded on trust? The ravenette apparently doesn't place any trust in him. Thor asks himself, if there ever has been trust in their relationship or if they always had the silent agreement on not talking about the lack of it. He wishes he could still trust Loki like he used to in their childhood, he could always count on Loki to be there for him, to rely on him, to be relied on. What had changed? Where had they gone wrong?

Can he still continue to be with Loki if the ravenette won't make up his mind? He doubts Loki had ever been really open to him, not because he didn't want to, but because he still can't trust Thor after all this time. Years and decades he had seen Thor replace him with random meaningless maidens, it had hurt him deeper than he ever let on. The blond had hoped to make it up to him somewhen, having apparently failed spectacular if Loki's words spoken in fury are any lead.

He doesn't want the best part of his life end, not like this. But is love enough to overcome the distrust that has settled in Thor's heart, to overcome all the lies Loki tries to feed him? Can he betray all his ideals for Loki's sake? Ignore his secretiveness? He doesn't want to live a lie and he surely doesn't want Loki do that. The ravenette's words don't leave him though, how he had left without a reason.

Does a relationship still makes sense when Loki doesn't want him anymore? The question is burning on his mind, makes his hands shake during their training, chills him to his bones. Panic flows through him, panic at the thought of what the answer could be. The others notice his distracted state and offer to shorten the exercise, all being drenched in sweat and rainwater. Throughout the warming up next to a grate, the dinner and their quiet conversations, the question doesn't leave Thor for a moment. Does Loki still want him?

After what feels like hours, Thor takes his leave. It makes even less sense to brood about it. There is just one person who can answer that question.

Loki's door stands slighty ajar. Thor hesitates to enter, he had intended to speak to his brother alone, to discuss their stupid fight. It is nonsense to keep this longer going than necessary, he hopes his brother would finally see sense and for once talk to him.

Thor edges to the door and can see the bed from this angle. Loki is fast asleep. Never would he leave the door open, especially when he is sleeping.

'Come in.'

He is not questioning how their mother could have guessed he was standing in front of the door.

'I didn't mean to disturb you.', Thor says, opening the door fully. Frigga sits next to the window through which the last light of the day seeps into the small room. She places the tome she had been reading on the sill.

'I couldn't wake him. Loki slept not much these past nights.' Frigga regards him with worry.

'I would like to say I am surprised.' Sometimes his brother would spend several succeding nights in the library, soaking up every word the old books could offer him.

She smiles weakly. 'You fought again, didn't you?'

'Should I ask how you know?' Thor asks himself if Loki told her or if this is another proof of her sixth sense regarding their lifes.

'I know my sons.'

'We had a little- discussion after Father's decision.' Thor is still surprised about the postponement, he can't believe Odin hadn't already made up his mind. Sif's banishment is proof enough, otherwise he wouldn't have relieved her of her duties.

She sighs. 'That is all?'

'I am not angry that he accuses Sif.' Thor is surprised by the truth. 'We somehow fought before. It was about, well, everything.' Everything is quite fitting. It still strikes Thor as unusual how Loki had yelled at him.

'You two are so different.' That sums it up. Maybe they are just too different. His doubts surface again.

'I came to make amends but I doubt he wants to hear it.' Does he really want to make amends or has he come to end the farce? He shudders.

She stands up and caresses his cheek. 'Just be honest with him.'

'Loki wants me to trust him. But how can I when all he ever tells are halftruths? Why can't he, just for one time, simply tell what's on his mind and not keep half of it to himself?' It frustrates Thor immensely.

'He means not to hurt you, Thor.', she tries to defend Loki.

'I know that he is afraid of being hurt, however he should know I would never..' Thor sighs.

'Loki knows, I am sure, but we both also know him. He was never easy.'

'I just wish he would be honest once. I don't know if I can live with his lies much longer.', he confesses. His heart aches at the mere thought of that. Could he even end it? Deep in his heart he knows, he would be content even with Loki's lies as long as the ravenette is at his side.

'Tell him, you'll never know until you talk to him.'

'Why would he listen? I tried to confront him.' He blames the comfort of his mother for letting that slip.

'About what?', she asks, evidently curious.

'It matters not much. But he evaded and refused to tell me anything. Now he won't even speak to me anymore.' Which is just part of the truth, both are evading each other.

She sighs again. 'Trust him to tell you everything you have to know. He is your brother. Otherwise confront him again. He is too much like Odin, tries to deal with everything alone.'

'He doesn't have to. But it is tiresome to show him he doesn't need to. Sometimes I don't even want to make amends.'

She seems dismayed. 'It is of course your decision. Your brother need you however, now more than ever.'

'Do you know something I don't know?' Suspicion grows in Thor.

'Loki will need your support.' Slowly Thor begins to understand what Loki means by Mother's cryptic behavior she's shown lately.

'In the trial? Father will never decide against Loki.' That much both of them know. But he doesn't quite believe this is what she meant.

'Among other occasions.', she evades his question.

'I am no child.' Why can't she simply speak her mind? Frigga had been keeping at least as many secrets as Loki from him. Thor feels like his whole family is keeping him in the dark, like everyone is in but him.

'Really? You quite often behave like one.', Loki murmurs. He yawns and stretches. How much he had heard, Thor knows not. 'What are you doing here anyway?'

'Talking to Mother.', he lies. Mother furrows her brow.

'I see.' Loki raises an eyebrow. He has been caught lying but Thor tries to suppress the urge to let it show.

Minutes later the blond leaves the room, making excuses about it already being quite late. He would talk to Loki when his mother wouldn't interrupt.

xXxXx

He doesn't remember how it started or when it ended. Loki just knows there had been yelling, accusing and cursing when he had last seen his golden brother. Upon waking up and seeing Thor who had vanished the evening before without any explanation, Loki had somehow lost it. How he came here of all places, he doesn't know and he doesn't care enough to find out. The bar is seldom used by anyone he knows, it is dark and gloomy enough to keep out most costumers who don't value privacy. The liquor is burning away the pain that has befallen his limbs, though not the one in his heart. That matters not much because by now he is drunken enough to not care about that big blond oaf who totally not deserves him.

The reason of the renewed fight is long forgotten when another blond shock of hair catches his attention.

'Hello Loki.', he seems genuine surprised to see him here.

'Hello Fandral.' Loki slurs a bit.

'Are you drunk?' Fandral asks flabbergasted.

'I shall hope so.' Loki grins widely. He certainly had drunken enough to be so and spend more than enough on the attempt.

'Why?' Can't Fandral see? Loki always suspected that the blond already knows about Thor and him, not that there would be much to know about now. So does he really need to ask why Loki gets drunk?

'Other people seem to find a lot of consolation in drinking far too much. Can't say I didn't try.' He is a little disappointed it didn't work the way he wanted it.

'What do you need consolation for?' Fandral frowns. Don't pretend, Loki wants to tell him.

'Can't tell you. It's a secret.' Loki chimes, knocking back the rest of his drink.

'A maiden?'

Loki laughs. 'Haven't you heard, Fandral? I am no real man. My father despises it. Maybe that's why I did it?', he muses. 'That's good. I tell him, it's all his fault.' Exactly what that gray-bearded bastard deserves.

'So you are into men?' He not really understands the question. Not that Fandral wouldn't know that he occasionally flirted with the blond while pretending to be drunk. Well, maybe he didn't know he was just pretending, but Loki can't see the difference.

So he nods, and orders another drink. With far more delicacy than the clumsy rude blond prince ever could.

'Who is it?' Fandral also orders but eyes Loki's drink strangely.

'It's a secret. Are you not listening? You would be shocked.', Loki grins widely again.

'Maybe you should go home, Loki.'

The ravenette sticks out his tongue, then starts to laugh loudly. 'You're funny. Where should I go? My family hates me. Everyone does.', he says grinning. He wouldn't be surprised if Fandral would feel the same about him.

Silence settles in which Loki has another drink. Or had it been two? He doesn't care and knows no one else does.

'Why doesn't he love me?', he asks no one in particular. Despair sweeps quickly through his body before being replaced by the pleasant numbness again.

'Come on, stand up.' Fandral stands up first, puts several coins on the counter and waits for Loki to do the same.

'Where are we going?', Loki asks with big eyes. He had been keen on continuing trying to get drunk enough to find consolation. Company hadn't been part of the plan.

'Surprise.'

It is a sure sign for just how intoxicated Loki got in the short time he spend here, that he merely shrugs, empties his glass and follows the blond. Not even the ravenette could explain the grin on his face or why he had the strong urge to laugh just about everything his friend says, he simply wants to forget about their fight, the possible ending of the best part of his life, everything he can't deal with at the moment. His vision is blackening around the edges, if it wouldn't be for his companion, Loki surely would have landed on the floor a few times more during his stumbling through the deserted streets of Asgard.

xXxXx

The feeling that something is wrong doesn't leave the thunder god the whole day. Ever since the stupid continuation of his dispute with his lover the feeling had been nagging at him. He is angry with himself for even responding to Loki's taunting words. Too well he knows the pride of Loki, knows how hurt he is, and still he had lashed out when the anger grew, when Loki's words rang true.

Thor regrets what he has said in his fury, he hadn't meant it, yet Loki refuses to hear his apologies. Whatever Thor had said must have hurt the unfathomable trickster more than he would admit. Maybe the whole thing about the strange blond really is just in Thor's head and Loki refuses because it grieves him how little trust Thor has.

It is late in the evening when Thor decides to drink away his worries and sorrows, that he realizes why he worries about Loki. He is still sick and had been in one of his rare drinking moods when Thor left him alone. Thor could never forgive himself if something were to happen to his brother.

On the opposite to him Loki doesn't have his usual drinking spots but Thor is sure it is useless to search near the palace. Loki would get as far away from here as he can, so no one would find him should Mother notice his absence. After hastening to Loki's room and making sure he truly is gone, Thor makes his way towards the city. Where he should start looking, he has no idea. Finally he has an idea.

'Hello.', Thor says quietly, after the door is opened.

'Hello, Thor. Good that you came.' Fandral motions him in. He looks very relieved.

Thor frowns but enters the apartment.

'How do you know he is here?', the other blond asks, leading the way to the parlor.

'Who?' Thor gets more and more confused.

Fandral turns around, and is surprised. 'Loki. Who else? Or why are you here?'

'I was looking for him, hoping you would help me. I didn't know he was here.', Thor confesses. What could his brother possibly do here? This is not the right time for jealousy, Thor tells himself. Loki hasn't fallen for Fandral, he just pretends every now and then for the sake of safekeeping.

'He was drinking with.. Let's call them unsavory characters.' That coming from Fandral who is known to linger around the darkest bars of Asgard, shocks Thor.

'What happened?'

'I brought him here so he wouldn't regret doing anything or say anything in public.' Fandral hesitates. 'Him being drunk in the healing halls was no better prospect.'

Thor nods. Just too well he knows his brother's drunk behavior when everything is funny and absolutely nothing important. In his life he had seen Loki drunk only a couple of times, he knows he isn't responding too well to alcohol, the reason why Loki mostly suppresses his drinking moods.

When he enters the room completely he already sees Loki lying on the ground, a giggling mass. He is possessively clutching an empty bottle which he lets fall the second he recognizes Thor.

'Hello, brother.', he slurs with a manic grin on his face.

'What are you doing here?', Thor asks softly though he can't keep the accusation out of his voice.

'Do you hate me?' The grin dies on Loki's face. 'You hate me.' The worlds seem to end for him.

Thor curses his luck. Of course tonight has to be the exception of Loki's fun escapades. He must have been brooding while drinking. Does he regret his hasty words?

'Where did you find him?' Thor turns back to Fandral.

'In the outskirts. Not a good place to be alone.' Thor can almost picture the scene. His brother wanting to coop with everything alone, being too proud to say the magic three little words with which Thor would be entirely his again, trying to erase the emptiness both are feeling each time they fight.

'Thor, please don't ignore me.', Loki whines, trying to stand up and catch Thor's attention.

'You know why he he was there?', Thor inquires, keeping an eye on Loki. The bottle had rolled out of his reach.

'He said something about his lover.' Fandral shrugs. 'You know more?'

'A little.', Thor states evasive.

'You two were fighting again, weren't you?' His friend had always been too perceptive.

Thor sighs. 'A little. He is disappointed I didn't quite believe him about Sif.'

'Thor.' Loki has managed to sit up, staring with big eyes up at him. 'I am sorry.' There they are. Those three words his brother would never utter while not being drunk. 'Don't hate me.'

Fandral frowns. 'He really must be drunk.'

Thor nods. 'Thanks for finding him.' He shudders when he thinks about Loki straying through the city alone.
'That's what friends are there for.' The other blond shrugs it off.

Thor casts an unsure glance towards the blond. Somehow he can't help but wonder what Loki might have said and what he really knows about the brothers. Finally he turns to Loki who had inched closer.

'We should go, Loki. You're drunk.' In the morning, he promises Loki silently, he would be more patient and insist on a calm conversation. That is the least Loki owes him.

'Thor. Please don't hate me.' He makes doe-eyes. 'I love you.'

'I love you too, brother.', Thor quickly says and suppresses the loving smile. Hopefully Loki would remain silent for the sake of their relationship. Fandral looks surprised at him, apparently Loki hadn't been that emotional before. It is still good to hear from the trickster that he loves him despite everything.

Loki vehemently shakes his head. 'No.' Either he doesn't believe him or he protests against the usage of the word 'brother', Thor doesn't know. The ravenette seems to forget about their company.

'Come here, Loki. You should go to bed.' Thor picks him up bridal-style. In this state he wouldn't be able to walk, furthermore, carrying him like this Thor makes sure Loki can't try too much.

'Not tired.' Loki says though he makes no attempt to escape Thor's arms. 'Don't leave.', he mumbles against his neck, cuddling into his arms. His hopes sink that their friend wouldn't notice.

'I won't.', Thor whispers back, to calm Loki.

'We will talk about this in the morning.', he adds, turning back to his friend. Fandral nods, letting them pass. Thor can only guess what the other blond knows or assumes but thinks it is way too much. Fandral knows he is angry with him for not bringing Loki straight back, however, can he guess the true reason for it? The way Loki noses his neck definitely isn't helping.

'Good night.', Fandral says quietly to Thor.

'Night, Fandral.', Loki chimes in. Thor shakes his head and leaves. That his brother tries to press kisses on his throat doesn't make the way home through Asgard's vast and mostly empty streets more pleasant.

xXxXx

Loki wakes from the light boring into his head. The pain in his head increases with further movement. Last night is more a blur than a memory. Groaning he shifts his weight and discovers that he is not alone in the surprising soft bed.

'What happened?', he grunts.

'You don't remember?', Thor's dark voice answers, making his head throb. After a short recount of the past night Loki rubs his hands over his face, trying to get a grip on the dull pain.

'You almost blew our cover.' Now there are definitely traces of fury in his voice.

'I know.' He remembers. Slowly Loki sits up to escape Thor's embrace.

'How could you be so reckless?', Thor demands angrily.

'Stop yelling.', Loki growls. His head feels like splintering.

'So, you go out and get drunk, almost tell Fandral about us and I shall be merciful because of your headache?' Sarcasm doesn't suit the blond but Loki's head is about to explode so he remains silent.

'Loki!' Thor truly exaggerates this.

'What?!', he snarls back.

'You risked everything!'

'I drank a little. Nothing you wouldn't do six times a week.' The little magic that is still under his command he uses to fight the worst pain.

'A little? You were a giggling mess on the floor! Basically you already told Fandral about us.' The blond talks himself into a rage.

'I am sorry, there was no intend behind it.' The blond completely overexaggerates the situation. 'And don't pretend it wasn't your fault. Everything was fine until you showed up.', Loki states.

Thor's eyebrows rise disbelieving. 'Until I-?'

'Why were you there anyway? If you didn't notice, I am no child anymore. I am not depended on your assistance.'

'I could see that.', Thor snaps back.

'Oh, you just love to pretend I am the only one who makes mistakes!' Loki climbs out of Thor's bed. He can't lie there next to him and listen to this.

'Well, right now you are overreacting! I am trying to understand you, Loki.'

'Are you now? That is fascinating.' Sarcasm taints his voice.

'You're never telling me anything.', Thor accuses. It might be true but right now Loki would rather drop dead than admit that.

'I am telling you more than anyone else.' With one exception, not that he would tell Thor.

'Than tell me who that man was!' A trace of despair is in his voice. This must be important for him.

'That is none of your business, idiot.', he hisses.

'It is like I personally offend you with it. Why won't you tell me? What is so bad you think I can't handle?' If Thor would just know.

'Why do you assume it is bad? Because everything I do is?' It is not bad, it is worse. Still Loki can't help but feel attacked and judged.

'Brother-' Thor wants to calm him, Loki doesn't want to calm down.

'No. No 'brother'. Just stop that farce.'

'You are lashing out without a reason.' Thor seems almost lost for words. 'You know what I mean. I feel like I don't even know you anymore.' It's a slap in the face.

'If you want this to end, you can have it. I have had enough. We're through!' Loki glares down at Thor, then turns around with determination. Tears brim in his eyes. Is he running away?, Loki asks himself.

'Where did that come from? Loki, wait.' Thor is hurt, Loki hears him rising quickly.

'You are not going anywhere.' Thor block the doors by easily overtaking him on his way to them.

'Let me go.' He just wants to get out of this living nightmare. Can't Thor just go away?

'No. First you are going to tell me what is wrong. You're running away, you're blocking me out. Do you want me to hate you?', Thor asks agitated, desperately trying to understand Loki.

It would be for the best. Thor grabs his upper arms when Loki attempts to push past him. He has to keep his face, he has said what he long feared. Thor must hate him, but he has to let him go. He can't let him continue a relationship he doesn't believe in. Loki nevertheless damns his stupid temper. But he can't keep Thor longer imprisoned.

Thor shoves him to the bed and forces him to sit.

'Do you remember your promise?' Blue eyes blaze in the soft morning light.

'Yes.', Loki whispers. He had promised years back to never lie to Thor when they are in bed.

'Do you want to end this?'

Loki hesitates only a split second but doesn't look at Thor. 'No.'

'Why do you say it then?' Thor furrows his brow.

He swallows. 'Because that's what you want.' Because Thor deserves better.

'I don't want that. I love you, Loki. I want to..' Thor sighs. 'Do you trust me?'

'Yes. Do you trust me?' Loki finally dares eye contact again.

'I do.', Thor says with more conviction than Loki would have deemed possible. With what does he deserves this?

'I am sorry, Thor.' He sniffles. Thor's arm draws him close, comforting him without words. 'I didn't mean to push you away so far.' He wills the tears away and sits up on his own.

'Are you going to tell me about him?', Thor asks softly.

'No.', Loki answers determinate. Can't he just let it rest? This has nothing to do with them.

Thor's face hardens, anger crosses his features and he stands up.

'Thor.' Loki stands up and grabs his wrist when Thor turns away to go. He cannot risk what Thor offered him when his love is being sincere and forgiving like this. Maybe it is time for his last resort. 'Let me explain.'

Thor takes a deep breath, then nods once.

'I am not free to tell you. I promised to protect him, with my life if necessary. And I will. I made a promise never to talk about him, and though I am willing to break it for you, I must keep it for him. His life would be in mortal danger when his name ever comes to the attention of the wrong people.'

'Why didn't you tell me before?' He is genuine surprised and relieved.

Loki sighs and looks over Thor's shoulder. 'I love you and I never planned for you to be part of this. It hurt me to hear you don't trust me.', he forces out.

'I am sorry, Loki. It is just.. I was jealous, I assume.' Thor sighs and pulls Loki into an embrace. 'I don't like to see you with anyone who'd endanger this.'

Loki laughs softly. 'He could never endanger us. No one could.'

Thor smiles a little. 'Can we just, I don't know, forget about all this?'

Loki nods and kisses him. 'Sounds like a good idea. How about reconciliation sex?', the ravenette grins.

He laughs, pressing his lips against Loki's. 'When you feel well again.'

'Listen, I-' He is sorry for treating the blond so ungrateful. For yelling when he should have explained. For being proud when he should have been understanding.

'It is alright.' Thor smiles loving. 'I know.'

The blond certainly knows him too well. He shouldn't have been so distrusting.

After Thor brought him back to the healing halls and kissed him good night despite the time of day so he could sleep through the effects of last night, Loki lies awake alone in the chamber, the light of the sun seeping in through the closed curtains.

It hurts to lie to Thor, but he would never betray the trust placed in him. He has no intention cheating on Thor, and in the end, he can't tell Thor about the other blond without endangering everything. Hopefully now his lover would finally cease asking.

xXxXx

'Are you going to tell him?'

Night has fallen over the realm eternal. The sandy haired man approaches the brooding ravenette.

'No, little one.' Loki lets his gaze wander over the bright outline of the city beneath them. 'How could I?'

xXxXxXx

Hello and thanks for reading.

Shocking revelation or was the last part too hidden? Sorry if it was, well we have plenty of time to find out all there is to know about our favorite stranger. And don't you worry, it will probably not be the ultimate end of their fight. (Unfortunately.)

Next week there will be one more regular update but the week after that (it should be the 29th of October) there will either be no update at all for one week or a postponed one cause I probably won't be able to write anything. I am sorry in advance.

Have a nice week(end), see you next Saturday. And maybe leave a review on your way out? Please? :)